Mighty Med (2013) s02e09 Episode Script

Less Than Hero!

Kaz, I have great news.
Tomorrow is the Domain's annual tournament for Dance Dance Superhero.
I also have great news.
Simon has grown a whole inch.
Anyway, the best part is, I convinced Skylar to come watch me win.
I can't impress her here where I'm a normo among superheroes.
But at the tournament, she'll see me as a dance dance superhero among normos.
That was actually really good.
You know, this friendship isn't gonna work out if we're both cool.
Gather round.
This is important.
Everyone, drop what you're doing.
Due to our near disaster with the Annihilator, I've devised a plan to increase the number of superheroes.
I'm lowering the minimum requirements to qualify for hero status from level nine powers to level six powers.
I'll be holding tryouts to re-evaluate all your previously undervalued, mostly pathetic powers.
Which reminds me.
Rodney, can I get a top-off? Hey, Horace, can I help judge the tryouts? Sure.
Your comic book expertise will be useful in judging superheroes.
What?! No fair.
I would be way better than Kaz.
I'm great at judging people.
Watch.
You stink! See, that's the problem, Alan.
You're not a people person.
You're more of an animal person.
That's not true.
Boo.
Wait, Alan, don't change back yet.
I need milk for my coffee.
As of today, anyone with level six powers or higher will be certified as a superhero.
Remember, if your only power is that you look like a lizard, you probably won't make the cut.
Okay, who's up first? You look like you could be useful.
So, what's your power? That was surprisingly dainty.
Dr.
Victrola, nobody listens to vinyl anymore.
Fred, I haven't seen you in months.
How you been? Great.
Then just okay.
Then really good, then not so good.
Then great again, then just okay.
And now, pretty good.
- How are you? - I'm fine.
Whoa! Didn't ask for your entire life story.
Anyway, I really wanna be a superhero, because my current job of driving that ambulance was pretty good, then just okay, then pretty good again, and then, not so great.
And now, really boring.
Kind of like that story.
Uh, so, what are your powers? I can travel at the speed of sound when I'm skipping, like this.
But much faster.
Yeah, sorry, Fred.
I can't certify you.
Lizard Man, I see you over there.
The fake mustache isn't fooling anyone.
Thanks for coming to watch me win the tournament, Skylar.
I'm just glad to get out of the Mighty Med.
Horace won't even let me try out to be a superhero again.
I feel like such a loser.
You're not a loser.
You're not a winner, but you're not a loser.
I am.
Even Lizard Man is more powerful than me, and all he can do is catch flies with his tongue.
I can't even do that.
See.
You know what they say.
Don't do that in public, it's creepy.
Okay, the future champion of Dance Dance Superhero tournament has arrived.
Ooh, I can't wait to meet him.
You think he'll autograph my hands? That's the only part of my body I never wash.
First of all, I'm the future champion, and secondly Anyway, the object of the game is to fight off the zombie villains on the screen and the more cool and elaborate your dance moves, the more points you get.
Watch.
I'll do a practice round.
Wow, you are good.
Can I try? Sure.
But it's pretty hard, and it takes a while to get I jumped three levels.
Is that good? Uh, it's pretty good, but not tournament good.
Connie, you should sign up for the tournament because you're not just good, you're tournament good.
I think I will sign up.
Maybe this is a chance for me to be good at something, and to get my competitive juices flowing again.
Thanks for bringing me here, Oliver.
You are the best.
Except at this game.
She's clearly better.
Look, Connie, I don't know if this is such a good idea.
I mean, you're already feeling pretty low.
Imagine what would happen to your self-esteem if you lose.
Oh, she's not going to lose.
You are.
I got an injured superhero needs attention, stat.
Where did that patient come from? Brought him in the ambulance.
Amba-lance? What amba-lance? Yeah, I can't say amba-lance.
So from now on, let's just call it the boo-boo car.
- So where is it? - It's right here.
It's invisible.
You can only see it with these glasses.
And you can only see these glasses with these glasses.
I can see those glasses.
Oh.
Wow! That's the coolest thing I've ever seen.
And it's not just your average invisible superhero hospital ambulance boo-boo car.
This one can fly 10,000 miles per hour and go anywhere in the universe.
Except Delaware.
We don't know why.
Dude, you have got to let me drive this thing.
I suppose I could, if you made me a level six superhero.
Are you trying to bribe me? Because if so, lower your voice.
I suppose I could, if you make me a level six superhero.
Okay.
I could bump you up to a level six if you had an additional superpower.
So I'm thinking of an even number between one and three.
Three.
Sure.
Three.
You must have psychic powers.
You are now qualified to be a superhero.
Thank you.
And here are the keys.
Are they invisible? No.
I just forgot to let go of them.
So, I heard you made Fred a superhero.
Who did you hear that from? From you.
I was standing over there, lurking.
This is where I come to lurk.
It's my lurk spot.
Anyway, I'm going to tell my Uncle Horace about this.
Unless What do you want, Alan? I wanna ride in the ambulance with you, because I love pushing buttons, and I bet this ambulance has many, many buttons.
So can I come with you? Fine.
Just don't do anything weird.
Got it.
Boop! Don't touch my belly button.
Sorry.
I told you, I love pushing buttons.
Welcome to the Domain's annual to-the-death blood battle.
Whoops, that's tomorrow's event.
Welcome to the Domain's annual Dance Dance Superhero tournament.
For our first match, Oliver will be taking on Connie! Uh, listen, Connie, maybe you should sit this one out.
I don't want this to affect our friendship.
That's sweet, but I think our friendship is strong enough to survive me completely crushing you.
You are doing down! Now, before we start, let's go over the rules, because they're pretty confusing.
Highest score wins.
I want a good, clean fight.
No biting, no tickling, and no dancing below the belt.
How can we not dance below our belts when our legs are below our belts? Easy.
Now they're above my belt.
Any other rules you wanna whine about? This is so cool.
We can go anywhere we want in the universe.
Where should we go? How about Antarctica? Antarctica isn't even a real place.
We should go to Never Never Land.
Uh-oh.
Superhero Gravitas has been injured by the villain the Ambusher in a South American rainforest.
- We better find Fred.
- There's no time.
Gravitas needs help now.
Starting engine.
Seriously? You know how much I love pushing buttons.
Stop with the belly button.
Initiating geo-satellite.
Activating auto pilot.
Opening garage door.
All right, now.
Let's see how fast this thing goes - That was awesome.
- That was nauseating.
Okay, there's Gravitas.
Now, be careful, and watch out for I was gonna say mosquitoes, but this is much worse.
I am the Ambusher.
Welcome to your final resting place.
Cool.
Because I could really use a nap.
Excuse me.
How am I supposed to sleep like this? Ambusher, why are you in a rainforest? There are so many more people in the cities to ambush.
I feel like I'm telling you how to do your job.
I'm creating a serum that will wipe out every plant in this rainforest, and once the governments of Earth see my power, they will bow down to me.
Oh, it's my wife.
She thinks I went to the market.
Alan, use your telekinesis to hit him with something.
I can't touch my hands to my head, or my fingers to your belly button.
And it's right there, taunting me.
Well, maybe someone will notice that we're missing, and send a superhero to save us.
Oh, geez.
Who are you? I am the Skipper.
A superhero, here to rescue these boys.
Wow.
How did you become a superhero? I bribed that teenager with an invisible boo-boo car.
This is really bad.
At first, it was pretty good.
Then it was kinda bad, and then, not so bad at all.
And now, it's pretty terrible.
It's gonna get really terrible.
Once I finish my serum, I'll destroy the rainforest, and you with it.
Hey.
This vine is stretching.
Must be from a rubber tree.
Maybe I can stretch far enough to get my phone off that rock.
Whoa! Got it.
Are you texting someone to come and help us? Yeah, in a minute.
First, let me finish this game of Bricklayer.
Ladies and gentlemen, did you see that? Because I didn't.
I was playing Bricklayer against Kaz.
You okay, Oliver? You look a little out of breath.
I'm fine.
Let's see you beat that, Con nie.
Well, you better take your "for sale" sign down, because you're about to get rented.
Owned.
You're about to get owned.
What happened? I have no idea.
The game must have shorted out.
Why did this have to happen? Why, dance gods? Why must you forsake us? No problem.
You just kicked the plug out of the wall.
Connie, you can't go.
Give it up, Oliver.
You're not gonna stop me from playing.
Look, I just got a text from Kaz.
We have to get the wormhole transporter, go to the rainforest, and save Kaz, Alan and Fred from the villain, the Ambusher.
You go.
I'm staying here.
What? Why? Because out there, I'm a former superhero without powers.
In here, playing this game, I'm finally good at something again.
Look, Skylar, you don't need this stupid game to feel good about yourself.
Even without powers, you're the greatest hero I know.
Kaz needs you.
Gus.
I'm withdrawing from the tournament.
I have more important things to do.
So do I.
But for the record, she forfeits, I win.
Nobody beats me at this game.
Nobody.
My serum is finished.
We can say good-bye to the rainforest.
Are you one of those kooks who thinks he can talk to plants? 'Cause so am I.
What are you doing here? Oh, never mind.
I'll just destroy you.
I don't know how we're gonna beat him without powers.
But we do have a power.
The power of dance.
Oh, geez.
Okay.
I have an idea.
I just need the key to the boo-boo car.
Whoa! All right, one of these buttons must open the door.
Thanks.
Man, that was a near disaster.
I really learned my lesson.
Never take a bribe to certify a superhero? No.
Always wear a protective cup over my belly button when I'm around Alan.
Boop.
Right now, let's get in the invisible boo-boo car and get back to Mighty Med.
Wait.
I feel like we're forgetting something.
Oh, right.
The severely injured superhero.
Horace, what's wrong with Nurse Gladys? Her new superhero name is Lady Spectrum.
And while her power to create rainbows makes everyone smile with delight, it wasn't very effective against the Harpooner.
Look, Horace, you have to make Skylar a superhero again.
She just defeated the Ambusher, and she's way more qualified than any of these new heroes.
No offense, Thermometer Man.
Well, I guess I could bump her up to level six.
Congratulations, Skylar.
You're a superhero again.
Really? Oh, sorry.
I have to take this call.
- This is amazing news.
- I know.
And it wouldn't have happened without your help.
You really impressed me today.
Nice moves out there.
Cha-cha-cha.
I really regret doing that.
And I really regret seeing it.
But at least I'm a superhero again.
- Skylar, you're not a superhero again.
- What? That was Dr.
Bridges.
We have to cancel our new classification system.
It turns out that Lady Spectrum was not the only new hero to lose their first fight.
What other hero lost? All of 'em.
Including Dr.
Frankel, whose only power is to manipulate sound.
I'm sorry, Skylar, but you can't qualify as a superhero now.
Will you stop it, Dr.
Frankel? It's not funny.
Ugh, this is the worst day ever.
Oh.
Now it's not so bad.

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