Monarch Of The Glen (2000) s04e10 Episode Script

Series 4, Episode 10

Hello.
Come here.
What's his name? Useless.
Aw, who called him that? What are you going to tell your mother about me? Nothing.
What about us? What would Hector have wanted? My father is dead.
( Useless whining ) Useless! ( barking ) ( theme music playing ) You can't just send him away.
I just did.
- Archie: Morning all.
- All: Morning.
Tea? Coffee? That is so kind.
Well, Lexie, last night was wonderful.
Everything was perfect.
- Almost perfect.
- Golly: it was a triumph, lass.
Duncan: The whole day went off pretty well, eh, Arch? - Hmm? - you know, Big Eric being exactly where I said he'd be.
We're a good team.
I think I'll have a quiet day, contemplating a life of leisure, now that we have a new and very capable Lady of Glenbogle.
- I've got a lot to learn.
- So have I.
Still, I hope life will still spring a few surprises.
Coffee, mother? Thank you.
Do you know, I'd love to travel again.
Why would you do that? Why would anyone want to leave here? Well, a man has to settle sometime, somewhere.
It sounds suspiciously like pipe and slippers to me.
You're much too young for that.
Oh, look, there's Useless with that young man from last night.
Lexie: Oh, so it is.
Excuse me.
Would you like some more coffee, Molly? I couldn't shake him, he's taken a real shine to me.
- What do you want from us? - I came to return your dog.
A word of thanks might be a start.
Thank you.
- Now please- - what? Get off my land? You have no right to wreck my mother's life.
Oh, that's rich.
What about my mother? Her life? who do you think wrecked that? Let's not start a slagging match here.
I'm sorry, but that's in the past and that's where it should stay.
It does affect all of us, especially Molly.
- Somebody mention me? - It's nothing, mother.
What affects especially me? Hector's son.
But that makes Molly his mom.
Molly is not Paul's mother, Duncan.
Hector MacDonald, you dirty dog.
- Morning, Kilwillie.
- I'm looking for Archie.
Belated gift for the intended honeymoon.
- Rather generous.
- Two round-the-world air tickets, first class.
- That's slightly more than rather, old boy.
- Molly will be very impressed.
That never crossed my mind! ( shudders ) You didn't know Hector like I did.
Do you think he could have kept this from me for what, 30 years? Longer.
I was born in '66.
You and countless others.
You'll be blaming him for all of them next.
I'm not blaming anyone.
Excuse me, I've got a thousand things to do.
Paul- - Molly, I think you'll be pleased- - Not now, Kilwillie.
- Oh, I say, Archie- - later, Kilwillie.
- Lexie? - A wee bit busy, Kilwillie.
Is he telling the truth? There's a letter from the estate's solicitors.
I'm afraid there's very little doubt.
These things happen.
Well, heaven knows, Hector was no saint.
He made a mistake, end of story.
- Is there anything I can do? - No.
thank you.
I told him what this would do to her.
- Archie, don't- - he had no right to come here.
Maybe you could try showing a bit of leg.
I brought your mate.
Come on, at least hear me out.
Right, you started this so you're going to listen to me whether you like it or not.
Paul: He asked me to leave.
How clear do you need it? You have dropped a bit of a bombshell around here.
The dust will settle and you can all get back to what you're best at.
Which is? Keeping your precious acres free from the common herd.
Listen, pal, I'm just as common as you are so don't come the underdog with me.
You married well.
I married the man that I love, and believe me, he is worth the effort.
I hoped he and I could get to know each other.
- It takes time.
- I haven't got time.
A couple of days at most.
I doubt the ice will thaw that quickly.
It's worth a try.
A letter, your lordship, a letter.
- Very far from unusual.
- This one is, sir, for this one bears the royal seal.
I've been out looking high and low.
I guessed you'd gone courting with Mrs.
MacDonald again.
No, no, I was just looking for Archie- good lord! Bad news, your lordship? Au contraire.
Kilwillie Spring Water has been selected for the royal table.
Is that all, sir? Bested in courtship, second in Molly's affections, yet my foot is on the silken ladder leading to the ultimate prize.
Kilwillie, by royal appointment.
hah! ( car doors slamming ) Does Archie know about this? No, not yet.
He's come a long way to find us - and doesn't have much time.
- I'm not going behind Archie's back.
You take care of Paul, I'll talk to Archie.
See if I can bring him round.
What about Molly? Is this not rubbing her nose in it a wee bit? No, it's helping her face the truth, Golly.
You might come to regret starting this, lass.
I didn't start anything.
Look, he's here, he's more of a MacDonald than I am.
I know that.
So, do you not think he deserves to know something about his roots? Archie has to know, mind.
I mean, he doesn't take a scrap of notice of me.
I may as well be part of the furniture.
Archie has got a lot on his mind, son.
He doesn't mean to seem ungrateful.
I mean, like yesterday.
If it wasn't for me, Big Eric would still be staggering around out there.
I told you you did a good job.
Yeah, I know, but a pat on the back from Archie wouldn't go amiss.
It's my own fault, of course.
Well, I don't push myself forward.
I'm always in the background being good old Dunc.
Well, do it, assert yourself.
Why? no one would take any notice.
Can you hear anything? No.
No, neither can I.
- ( rock thuds ) - Dry as a bone.
The brochures came.
I know, everywhere we talked about is so expensive.
We got married economy class.
I want our honeymoon to be something really special, something to look back on when the house is overrun with little people.
Don't jump the gun, you.
Anyway, all I need is for you to be there.
That makes it special.
Well, that and the hot sun and the golden beaches.
How much do you love me? Oh, about that much.
A lot.
Good, because you'll need to.
- Paul's back.
- You've seen him? - No, I brought him.
- What? He's Hector's son.
You can't pretend he doesn't exist.
- Where is he? - Just hear me out.
- Where is he? - Paul is part of this family.
Okay? you can't just send him away.
For Molly's sake, as long as Paul's a stranger to her then Hector will be too.
- She loved my father.
- And he betrayed her.
If he was alive today, she would rant and rave but eventually she would forgive him.
- I doubt it.
- Paul is a living reminder of Hector, - just like you are.
- You are wrong to interfere.
Archie, this gives me the right to interfere.
I am part of this family.
Paul is too.
Where is he? You tell me where he is.
I'll take no time to dig a trench.
Yeah, so long as he comes up with the idea.
Duncan, Paul was just reminding me, there's the burn not 50 yards away.
What do you think? Have you any ideas? It's a fair way to move a house, Golly.
So, maybe we could? - Buy a bucket? - Buy a bucket, or? Hey, we could dig a trench.
- Great idea, mate.
- Excellent.
Badger! - How are you feeling? - Fine.
I wish you could talk to me about this.
Why? it's the past.
Live for today, look forward to tomorrow.
Yeah, but something as big as this, Molly.
Hector had a fling, there was a child, that's it.
If you want to talk to him - To whom? - Paul.
It's not too late.
Why on earth should I want to do that? Where is he? What are you playing at, Golly? I don't believe he means any harm.
He's done enough.
I don't want him running into my mother again.
Look, I'm concerned about Molly, too, but the lad has rights as well.
- Does he? - Yes, he does, Archie, and so do I.
A lot of this is my fault.
I have some amends to make here.
Archie, that fellow is attempting to steal my commercial assets.
We were looking for a source of water for the house.
- What's wrong with the well? - It's dry.
- It was okay last year.
- Underground springs run to their own plans, not ours.
He can't live here without water.
He'll have to live without mine.
I don't know if you've noticed, but it falls from the sky on a pretty regular basis.
Yes, and what falls on my land is my own.
Archie.
I don't want to fall out with you over this, but dash it all, my water's about to furnish the royal table.
I can't have it used by every Tom, Dick and Golly for their ablutions.
That is both petty and insulting.
Petty? Archibald MacDonald, consider our two great and ancient houses in dispute.
Okay.
Oh.
Badger.
Do you see the trouble he's caused? You shouldn't have got involved, Golly.
Don't take it out on him.
It's me you should be talking to.
I have nothing to say to you that I haven't said already.
Lads, lads! This is not like you, Archie.
I want him away from here.
No, son, this is my home, he is my guest.
Right.
It's on your head.
What about Kilwillie? He is the least of my problems right now.
You deal with it.
- ( knocking ) - Come in.
- Andrew: I hope this isn't a bad time.
- Not at all.
Do sit down.
You've no shortage of bedtime reading.
Do you know how few I've actually read? They're just a silent reminder of how little I know.
But we learn through living, don't we? I admit, I've been a bit overzealous in that regard.
Bet you wouldn't change a day of it.
Maybe the odd day.
But, whether it's my age, or maybe it's this place, but I'm ready to change, Molly.
Don't change too much, you'll completely lose your mystery.
I don't want to be a mystery - I want to be a very good neighbor, and a good friend.
Another Glenbogle casualty.
People come here and lose the will to leave.
Why leave- when everything you want is here? You and your husband were very lucky.
My husband.
Yes.
Actually there is something that you could do for me, if you'd be so kind.
Kilwillie: Kilwillie Spring Water will be the most sought-after, the most exclusive, the most hideously expensive manifestation of god's great bounty that ever fell upon our heads.
Your mission is to guard every drop and trickle of this priceless commodity.
Never in the history of bottled water has so much depended on so few.
Carry on.
Seems Mrs.
MacDonald has finally passed him over.
It still looks good to me.
Disciplined drawing, deft brushwork and a pretty sound composition.
But I completely failed to capture the character within.
- Where's it go? - This way.
- Mother? - Keep going.
Can I have a word? In here.
Golly needs your support.
Don't abandon him because of me.
I can't keep you out of Golly's house - but I can, and I will, keep you out of mine.
- Why? - Have you seen my mother? - this isn't about your mother.
- Her feelings aren't important? - of course they are.
She'll deal with this her own way, like we have to do.
I don't want this any more than you, Archie, but we are brothers, that is a reality.
- ( Archie sighs ) - Paul's right.
There is more to this than just Molly's feelings.
First Golly, now you, why can't we just focus on what's best for mother? Why can't we just think about what's best for all of us, Arch? Well, we'd better start by canceling the honeymoon.
What? I can't leave here with him around and my mother like that.
This place rules our lives, doesn't it? Glenbogle has to come first.
We're just caretakers, Lex.
We don't own it, it owns us.
Badger, some tins from the pantry.
Oh, artichoke hearts, gentlemen's relish and shoe polish.
Thank you, your lordship.
Did you happen to bring a tin opener? I thought butlers had those.
Oh, right enough, your lordship.
I'll collect these tomorrow morning when I bring the silver.
Very good, your lordship.
Molly, what have you done with it? Oh, that- it's where it belongs.
And before you say anything, the answer is definitely no.
- Really? - nothing to do with Hector.
It was a poor painting and I've been meaning to take it down for some time.
- I thought it was a good painting.
- No, it wasn't.
After all, I should know, I studied at the slade before I came here.
You don't regret that, though, do you? Heavens no, being the Lady of Glenbogle in this beautiful, isolated place and all those wonderful years with Hector, of course I don't regret it.
Whatever you might think, son, no man gives up his own child without a great deal of pain.
Sounds like experience.
It's my daughter.
I've seen her since.
How did that feel? Like looking in a mirror.
She was a stranger to me, but I knew her like my own hand.
Can't believe Hector lost any sleep over me.
Oh, he did, he did.
Many a time there'd be a knock on my door in the middle of the night, here he'd be, bottle of malt in his hand.
What did he talk about? What it would be like if he met you, what you looked like.
How you were getting on.
Caused me a few sleepless nights, too, I can tell you.
Not to mention some pretty ferocious hangovers.
- I've been thinking.
- And? And I don't think we should let Kilwillie call the shots.
I think we should strike back tomorrow.
Lexie: I just can't get through to her.
- I've tried but- - ( door opening ) - Morning, mother.
- Kedgeree for breakfast, Molly, your favorite.
No time, dear, I must pack.
What do you mean, pack? I'm leaving.
- What, for a holiday? - No, just leaving.
I'll go.
- Oh, give me a hand.
- You cannot just up and leave.
My mind is made up.
Don't try and stop me.
Let's talk about it.
I'll keep in touch, of course.
let you know where I am.
- I promise you, he won't come here again.
- Who won't? - Paul, I'll get rid of him.
- Archie, please.
- Badger? - Yes? I claim this land in the name of the Glenbogle estate.
I see.
Aye, right, well, surrender now and no one need get hurt.
Technically, it's not mine to surrender.
Now, shall I pour us some tea, whilst you think on that? Aye, pour us some tea.
Good lord! Tea with the enemy? He's just following my orders.
- You orders? - Aye.
Maybe now you'll listen to our demands.
I'll be negotiating with Archie.
I only talk to the organ-grinder.
Pompous ass.
He had the sheer affrontery to call me pompous.
Good lord.
I take it he'll be disciplined.
- It's out of my hands.
- he's in your employ.
- No.
- Then what is he doing here? He's my father's son.
Well, then he ought to know better.
What?! He's Hector's son, he turned up a couple of days ago.
Good god.
So you can see how your waterworks aren't exactly top of my agenda at the moment.
Hector? Does Molly know? - Mm-hmm.
- And? She's leaving.
- Good morning.
- Morning.
We'd like to speak to Sergeant Bowman, please.
Paul Bowman? He's left this as a contact address.
- Ah-ha.
- So, he's here? Yes, yes he was.
He dropped in just to say hello, but he's gone now.
Golly: Is there something you're not telling us? Technically, I should be in barracks.
You mean you're AWOL? I had compassionate leave, of course, when mom was ill.
And for the funeral.
So you haven't been back since? There was a posting waiting for me in Cyprus.
But with mom gone and the house and everything I've done a lot of overseas tours, but I've always had somewhere to come back to.
Somewhere I'm- you know, home.
Is there something we can do? I've caused enough trouble already.
Time I was on my way.
Is this a court-martial job, son? Yeah.
but if I'd found my father it would have been worth it.
What about going back, facing the music? - I can't, not yet.
- It doesn't seem right, though, just leaving with nothing.
I've seen the place.
You all.
It's better than nothing.
Golly: Come on, son.
Come on, I'll give you a lift to the station.
I've told Archie and Lexie, of course.
But I wanted you to know from me, not second-hand.
But where will you go? How will you live? There are one or two minor details to hammer out.
I have friends and contacts all over the world.
I could put you in touch with them.
You'd be guaranteed a warm welcome.
Thank you.
Or, I could come with you.
As a friend, nothing else.
I wouldn't dream of dragging you away.
Your cottage, you're so happy here.
Bricks and mortar, Molly.
That's not where the heart is.
I hope I haven't offended you.
Not at all.
It's a very kind offer.
And I shall give it some thought.
It's been a shock, son, for Archie.
It'll take him a wee while to get used to it.
It's been a shock for me too.
But it's more than that with him.
He looks at me and he sees something he can't handle.
I don't know what it is.
Golly: They'll be watching the station.
I'll take you back, wait until nightfall and then you can get past them.
Golly, I've got you in enough trouble as it is.
But Archie? Lexie? Oh, they'll be fine.
Well, me then? Your friendship means a great deal to me, Kilwillie, but the day has come for me to break the bonds of Glenbogle.
Archie did tell me a bit about the circumstances.
Hector? It came as a bit of a shock.
So Hector never confided in you? No, he didn't.
Just in Golly, apparently.
- Golly knew? - According to Archie.
And he said nothing.
I beg you to reconsider.
This is a time when you should be among your friends, Molly, - not all alone in the world.
- I won't be all alone.
Andrew's offered to come with me.
He's on the run from the army, he's put Kilwillie's back up, he's turned Golly against me, how can you defend him? Because he's your own flesh and blood, Archie.
- he's risked everything to come here.
- Yeah, to cause trouble.
To find out a little bit about your father.
A few scraps, other people's memories.
It means a lot, Arch, believe me.
He'll be gone by nightfall.
Go and see him, eh? You knew and you said nothing.
- I thought it was the right thing to do.
- For whom? I've carried this for 30 years and I would gladly carry it for 30 more to protect what I hold dear.
What? Hector's reputation? No, your family.
I'm leaving.
Are you? You did that once before.
How dare you? You know nothing about what happened that day.
Nothing at all, or why I left.
- I was 19.
I came back, didn't I? - I know, by then - Megan was already carrying Hector's child.
- And so was I.
- You can't blame me for that.
- I don't, but I don't blame Hector either.
Listen, Molly, it is too late for him to ask your forgiveness, but it is not too late for you to grant it.
You worked for Archie long? Born into it.
Part of the furniture, eh? Aye.
What is his problem? It's not really his fault.
He's got a lot to put up with, being the laird and all.
It can't be easy, doing that all on your own.
He lost a brother, didn't he? Jamie, aye, drowned trying to save the family labrador.
Archie was there, mind, but nothing he could do.
He loved this view.
He loved my mother.
He was an average fisherman, a rather poor golfer.
He loved his dogs, the hills, loved his malt, especially that.
He fought in Korea, he was stubborn, sometimes stupid.
He often talked too much, sometimes not enough.
And we thought the world of him.
Thank you, Archie.
Duncan told me what happened to Jamie.
I'm really sorry for you.
I want you to go now.
Andrew: Golly? I was looking for Kilwillie.
He said he was coming up to see you.
Did he? Something wrong? You've not heard then, that Molly's intent upon leaving? Well, is that a bad thing? I'd like to know who's been encouraging her.
- Well, perhaps she needs a break.
- No.
No, she needs to stay and face things.
If she runs now, she'll be running forever.
Maybe you're right.
I am right.
tie it and secure it.
His lordship that man has taken leave of his senses.
If we let him finish it, you can kiss goodbye to your water.
It's okay, we'll deal with it.
You don't have to get involved.
Well since I'm here, it's the least I can do.
Yeah, and I have a plan.
Good, Duncan.
I'll create a diversion, lead these three on a merry dance through the woods, and you two take down the fence.
Will they not just put it back up again? Paul: Yes, but sometimes you have to show the enemy you can be as bloody-minded as they are.
Drag them to the negotiating table.
- right, Duncan? - That was my thinking, exactly.
Okay, Duncan, let's go with it.
All right, Duncan.
Come on, lads, I haven't even started yet.
Come on.
We've got our diversion, let's get on with the job.
Badger? What brings you here? Just trying to walk off the effects of Golly's cooking.
Good lunch, was it? Venison, potatoes, fresh vegetables.
What was that sauce, Golly? It was red wine, mustard and wild thyme.
That must have been grand.
It still is.
We couldn't finish it.
We were wondering maybe if you could help us out there.
Well, what about my duties? There are times, Badger, when duty betrays common sense, and we foot soldiers, as it were, should unite to put an end to this madness.
Aye, aye.
We're lions led by donkeys right enough.
I'd be happy to take lunch with you.
Excellent.
This way, Badger.
Look after our guest, Golly.
My pleasure, Paul.
( humming ) I'm sorry, Badger, I hope you don't mind, but seeing as how they've captured Duncan.
I'd rather be a prisoner of a gentleman than a free man in a world gone mad.
Lexie: This water business is a farce.
You've let it get completely out of control.
Kilwillie's entitled to protect what's his.
Anyway, he didn't start it.
Paul did.
All his fault as per usual.
Give him a break, Arch.
He's upset everyone.
He's upset mother.
You can't blame him, it's not his fault.
- Where are you going? - There's something I have to do.
Send Duncan.
I can't.
I think he was finally beginning to believe he could do it.
You know, be the laird.
Molly, don't go, please.
- Kilwillie: Are we ready for the exchange of prisoners? - That we are, your lordship.
Good.
Send Badger over.
Not on your life.
You give us Duncan first.
This is my land, send over Badger.
I don't care.
You give us Duncan and we'll give you Badger.
- Badger! - Duncan! Lexie: Right, now let me through.
Now, Lexie, this is men's talk.
Out of your backsides, as usual.
Now, do you expect Golly to live without water? Well, it's a precious commercial asset.
And you really think that Golly's needs will make a scrap of difference to your business? This is a matter of principle.
Principle? Listen, there are people hurting round here.
Archie and Paul over there.
And what about Molly, too, Kilwillie? Don't forget about her.
And you are standing here bickering over a matter of principle.
Over a small amount of water.
Don't you know that there's more to life than that? Hear, hear.
I'm a reasonable man, Lexie.
If you've got a suggestion, I'll listen to it.
Thank you.
Now, we can start by taking care of our friends.
I have a plan which involves you all, and which, by the way, gentlemen, is not optional.
Come on.
Well? Well, the thing is, Archie, I've been a damned fool.
You were only trying to protect your own.
If it's at the expense of one's friendships then it's a very poor show.
Golly will have his water at an annual peppercorn rent.
That's very generous of you.
And didn't you have something else in mind, Kilwillie, as a sort of goodwill gesture? Oh, all right.
Golly can take advantage of my offer much sooner if he has some assistance with the building work.
What did you have in mind? I should like to place my estate workers at his disposal today.
Many hands, as we know, make light work.
- He'll be very grateful.
- We can help too, Arch.
No, no, I won't go to Golly's house.
You know why.
I know why you should- because he's your ghillie and you're his boss.
Okay, so I'll go and round up some helpers but the laird should be there, too.
As you said, Glenbogle does come first.
- ( knocking ) - Come in.
Here you go.
Not too much, is there? You tell me, Molly.
You've unfinished business here, and you know it.
- ( people talking ) - What's going on? Quite a turnout.
It'll be a good time to say goodbye at least.
No.
Pack a bag and slip out the back door? That may be my style, Molly, it certainly isn't yours.
Put you backs into it, lads.
Lord Kilwillie's orders.
He'll be back at headquarters, I suppose? Messed up, didn't I? Good old Dunc.
Can't even create a diversion.
Duncan! Aye, here we go again.
Golly: Better see what the man wants.
Boss.
Hey, Big Eric.
We'll not see his like round here for a while.
Nope.
read it.
They're yours, Dunc, you did a good job.
There's beer and food for everyone here.
All right? So, what can I do? Paul: You can give me a hand with this, I suppose.
- Where do you want it? - Up there.
Ready when you are.
Goodbyes are hard.
Molly: That's Hector's son down there with Archie.
His son, not mine.
Are you surprised I want to leave? No but I'll be surprised if you do.
I don't think you'll run away.
You're right.
Shall we join them? I'll go and unpack first.
( Useless barking ) It's fortunate that neither of you inherited your father's D.
I.
Y.
Skills.
- Useless? - Golly: He'll be back.
Look, Golly, I'm sorry.
I had no right to talk to you the way that I did.
This has been a lot tougher for you than most people imagine.
It was like he'd come back.
But it wasn't him, it could never be.
Archie, Archie, you were a child then.
Stop blaming yourself.
Jamie would have been a fine laird, but he couldn't have done more or better than you.
Don't look back anymore, son.
Perhaps I should talk to Paul.
I can't tell you how to feel but if I'd lost a brother I'd be in no mind to lose another.
( Useless whining ) Get away from the edge, Paul, come on.
Useless is stuck, poor lad.
He'll make his own way back.
No, he won't.
Come on.
Here.
Come on, Useless.
- Got him? - yep.
Here, give me your hand.
Come on.
Paul! It's Archie.
Archie! Where are they? Where are they? What's going on? I can't see them.
( large gasping ) Archie! - Have you got him, Golly? - I've got him, I've got him.
- On your feet.
- I've got him.
- Go! - I've got him.
- Let's get him out.
- Come on! Duncan: Come on, lie him down! Archie? You okay? Welcome back.
( whimpers ) You shouldn't be drinking beer, young lady.
And why not? Because you know what it does to you.
You, Golly, know far too much about me.
Listen, Molly, I really am sorry that I kept it from you.
Mrs.
MacDonald, I wanted to apologize- no, please, there's really no need.
So, you'll be staying for a while? No, I'm going to go back to my regiment.
Well then, you must visit us whenever you can.
Your father loved this place.
His heart was here.
Thank you.
So, it looks like I'll have you under my feet after all.
You know, Glenbogle wouldn't be the same without you, mother.
And it wouldn't be the success it is without you, Archie.
You've done it, you've turned this place around.
With a little help.
Kilwillie: So, you two, is the honeymoon back on the agenda? No, I don't think we can- well, mother's not going anywhere.
Golly and Duncan can look after the place.
I'm sure you'll keep a neighborly eye out.
So, what's to stop us? Oh, Kilwillie.
Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
- ( footsteps approaching ) - Come on, come on, don't keep the man waiting.
Lexie: We're coming, we're coming.
sorry.
It took so long - have you got the tickets? Yes, they're here, come on.
Molly: Let me help you.
- Duncan: goodbye! - Last one.
That's it.
Goodbye my darlings, have a lovely time.
Duncan: Take care.
See ya! Take care.
Bye.
- Bye! - Bye! ( theme music playing )
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