Monk s04e11 Episode Script

Mr. Monk Bumps His Head

You sure this is it? This is it.
What time is it? I don't see him.
He'll be here.
Mr.
Monk, do you think he really has information about Trudy? Mm-hmm.
What if he's lying just to get the reward money? What if he's not? What if he's the real thing? Do you have the cash? I just don't want you getting your hopes up.
Natalie, I don't have an abundance of hope.
Let me enjoy the little I have.
Please, give it to me.
Okay.
Okay.
You wait over there by the facility thing.
You mean the bathroom? I believe they're called facility things.
I'm not leaving you.
Natalie, he said to come alone.
If he sees you here, he won't stop.
Mr.
Monk, my job is to help you, not to wait for you in the facility thing.
This is about Trudy.
I have got to do this.
Please.
All right.
But just promise me you won't pay him unless you're sure.
And if you need anything, yell.
Good luck.
[Door Closes.]
Psst.
Psst! Are you Monk? That for me? You said you had a picture.
You've been lookin' for a six-fingered man? Yeah.
Where did you get this? Took it myself.
I met him in Vancouver, Canada.
He was drunk.
He was talking about killing your wife with a car bomb.
What's his name? The picture's free, Mr.
Monk.
The name's gonna cost you.
Wait, wait, wait, wait Wait a minute.
- This sixth finger - Yeah, what about it? There's no hair on the knuckle.
This photograph has been doctored.
And the license plate is not Canadian.
You can't help me at all, can you? Give me the You can't - Give me the money! - Natalie! Natalie! [Pipe Clatters.]
Damn it.
[Engine Starts.]
Mr.
Monk? Mr.
Monk? ~~ [Up-tempo Folk.]
~ It's a jungle out there ~ ~ Disorder and confusion everywhere ~ ~ No one seems to care ~ ~ Well, I do Hey, who's in charge here ~ ~ It's a jungle out there ~ ~ Poison in the very air we breathe ~ ~ Do you know what's in the water that you drink, well, I do ~ ~ And it's amazing ~ ~ People think I'm crazy 'cause I worry all the time ~ ~ If you paid attention you'd be worried too ~ ~ You better pay attention or this world we love so much ~ ~ Mightjust kill you ~ ~ I could be wrong now ~ ~ But I don't think so ~ ~'Cause it's a jungle out there ~ ~ It's a jungle out there ~~ [Groaning.]
Hey.
What are you doin'? You can't ride back here.
Does this look like a Greyhound bus to you? No.
Buses have windows and seats.
It was a rhetorical question.
[Groans.]
Are you all right? Look, buddy, it's not me.
But if I get caught with a civilian back here, I could lose my insurance.
Listen, do-do you have any money? No, sorry.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Here.
Buy yourself some dinner.
What are you doing? Smoothing it out.
Why? I don't know.
Good afternoon, Kirby.
Cora.
They said it might rain later.
Oh, well, we'll know soon enough.
I got some food forJinxy.
That's his favorite brand.
They fed him a completely different brand at the shelter while I was gone.
You were gone? Yeah, I was on vacation.
I just got back.
Oh.
Good for you.
A little, uh a little weekend getaway.
Actually, I was gone for three months.
I was on that cruise.
You remember.
We talked about that.
You told me I should take a lot of pictures.
Did I? They'll be ready on Thursday.
I can't wait to show you.
Especially Greece.
I never knew there were so many islands.
Excuse me, Cora.
I'm sorry.
I just remembered.
I gotta I have to go pick up clean up the, uh, back room.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
I'll bring those pictures around.
Yeah, yeah.
You do that.
All right.
[Man.]
Hey, excuse me.
Hey.
Hey! Don't ponce my ride.
What are you doin'? It's just It's not quite straight.
What part of"Don't ponce my ride" don't you understand? Well, "ponce.
" Most of it.
All of it, really.
Look, man, this is a B.
M.
W.
5 Series, all right? I don't let my wife touch this car, and she bought me this car.
You think I'm gonna let you touch it? Buddy, what is your problem? I don't know.
I can't I can't stop.
I don't know what's wrong with me, but it's almost there.
Hey, how about I just rip you a new one? Uh, no.
No, no.
Uh, I don't need a new one.
Where you from? I don't know.
Well, how about you do this town a favor.
You figure out where it is you're from, and then get your sorry ass back there.
Okay.
Thank you.
~ Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys ~ ~ Don't let 'em pick guitars and drive~ Is that Willie Nelson? You hate country music.
~ Let 'em be doctors and lawyers and such ~ You been coming in singing and dancing every day this week.
What's his name? Well, maybe I'm just happy.
Isn't that possible? Sure, it's possible.
What's his name? [Monk Clears Throat.]
Oh.
Good morning.
Can you feed me? We can try.
- Breakfast, lunch or dinner? - Um Doesn't matter.
It's the same menu anyway.
Well, you can sit anywhere you like.
Oh Here.
How about right over here? You can watch the world go by.
Or not go by.
Here you go.
Sir? Excuse me? Are you okay? Did you get in a fight or something? Uh Can I get you something to drink? Do you have any bottled water? We can do that.
Wait.
I have a favorite brand.
It's the only brand I drink.
It's called, um It's called, um I can't remember.
I'll just bring you ours.
Talk to those guys.
Get a list of the regulars.
I want a list of all the truckers that park here overnight.
Yes, sir.
This is my fault.
I should never have left him.
You're supposed to say, "No, Natalie, it's not your fault.
Stop blaming yourself.
" Sorry.
Say it! It's not your fault.
Stop blaming yourself.
[Sighs.]
It's all my fault.
Captain! - What do you got? - Found his wallet.
I.
D.
's still in there.
Money's gone.
Robbery.
Well, believe it or not, that's good news.
Why? If it was a kidnapper, he'd have other things on his mind.
Captain, Mr.
Monk gets all his money from the bank.
They're brand-new bills.
Maybe they keep track of the serial numbers.
That's good.
We'll check it out.
Maybe this guy really did have a clue about Trudy's murder, and Monk solved the case.
I mean, he found the guy who killed Trudy and killed him.
And then he moved someplace else, changed his name and started a new life.
Without telling us? Happens all the time.
It does? It happens occasionally.
It's not unprecedented.
I never said it.
Good.
How was everything? How's that water? I like it! See? You have a new favorite brand.
It's a big day for you.
Yeah.
Now, I'm just curious.
Why do you have everything on different plates? Is it like a religious thing? I guess so.
Is that why you wash your hands every two minutes? - Probably.
- Well, to each his own.
All right.
Here you go.
Whenever you are ready.
Oh.
12.
50.
Is there a problem? Um, I only have five dollars.
You're having a rough time, aren't you? You know what? I'll pay the rest.
Pay me back when you can.
Debbie, what are you doing? I can tell he's an honest guy.
- I am? - Mm-hmm.
I think you're right.
I am.
Thank you.
I will pay you back.
I promise.
There's no rush.
We're both gonna die here.
Yeah.
Oh, excuse me.
How far am I from police headquarters? - [Laughs.]
- Headquarters? Excuse me.
You caught me cheating.
Don't tell anybody.
I won't.
What can we do for you? I'm a little confused.
Oh, that happens all the time.
Let me guess.
You got off the interstate, and you were looking for a gas station.
No.
No.
No, no, no.
I'm not I'm not lost.
Well, I am.
I don't know who I am.
You can't remember? Like, amnesia? Have a seat.
That's a hell of a speed bump you got there.
[Groans.]
I've got an ice pack somewhere.
- Has a doctor seen that? - I don't know.
- How'd that happen? - I can tell you how it happened.
- Cora? - A paint can dropped on his head, and he about fell overboard.
Overboard? How do you know this, Cora? Because I was there.
It was in Naples, Italy.
He was on my cruise.
- So you know this man? - Yeah, I know the man.
Of course I know the man.
He's my husband.
[Thunder Rumbling.]
Feel better? You should.
You slept for 15 hours.
I had the strangest dream.
L-I dreamt that you were a blond A blond? And you And you looked pretty.
Different.
Pretty different.
- What are you doing? - Well, I'm, uh It's just a religious thing.
- Don't play with your food.
Just eat it.
- Okay.
The roof again.
This place is a dump! Yeah, I'm sorry.
Aw! [Baby Talk.]
[Meows.]
We have a cat.
You love cats.
I love cats.
Jinxy, this is my new husband Jerry.
My name is Jerry? Jerry Little.
Jerry.
Short forJeremiah, which is my favorite name.
That's certainly a coincidence.
Isn't it? Oh Are these clothes new? I bought 'em yesterday.
They look good.
Ooh, that is a good look on you.
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
Well, where-where-where where are my clothes? You lost 'em.
You lost everything gambling.
I gamble? Mm-hmm.
Darling, you have a serious addiction.
Can't stop yourself.
Bet all your luggage and bet everything you own on red.
I was in the casino.
I was watchin' ya.
That's where we met.
Now what? The milk, um I feel I feel frightened.
You're afraid of milk? How is that possible? What-What is wrong with me? It probably happened when you banged your head.
Just give it a few days.
You'll be okay.
Maybe I should see a doctor.
Oh, you saw a doctor.
Don't you remember? Oh, right.
He told you to trust me and to do everything that I say.
Yes, dear.
Oh, oh.
Um, I'm gonna need some money.
I owe that waitress seven dollars.
What do you care? I just wanna do the right thing.
Maybe later.
Right now, you got some chores to do.
You love doing chores.
Oh.
Here's your list.
Fix-Fix the roof? No.
Mm-hmm.
No, l-I can't.
Sure you can.
You're a roofer.
I'm a roofer? That's your job.
I'll tell you what, tiger.
You fix the roof, and then later on tonight [Sputters.]
I'll show you how much I appreciate it.
[Panting.]
Here's your toolbox.
Up you go.
Now what? Uh, I'm-I'm afraid.
You're up two feet, Jerry.
You can do this.
That's why you became a roofer to get over your fear of heights.
And it worked.
You're world-famous.
Jerry, you're the king of all the roofers.
Now, up you go.
Yes, dear.
Oh! Ooh! I'm a roofer? What the hell? [Yells.]
Help! Help! Somebody get 'em off me! You recognize him? No.
His name is Teddy Mulligan.
You were right about Monk's money.
The serial numbers led us right to him.
He's confessed to everything.
He tried to con Monk out of the reward money.
Then where's Mr.
Monk? Mulligan says there was a fight.
Oh, my God.
And Mulligan hit him on the head.
Oh, my God.
And then he threw him on the back of a truck, and the truck drove away.
That's all he knows.
Is he Is he dead? I don't think so.
There's been no report of a body.
Hey, he's out there.
If somebody's seen him, we'll find him.
I promise.
[Bell Jingles.]
Hey, welcome back.
Good afternoon.
Hey.
Are you two, uh, together? Yeah, we're married.
We're married.
This is my husband Jerry.
Uh, my name is Jerry, and we're married.
Um No kidding? Well, congratulations.
Thank you, Gail.
Yeah, just like in the movies.
We met on that cruise I took.
Saw each other in the casino, and boom.
[Imitates Explosion.]
We knew, didn't we? We knew.
Love at first sight.
That's how it happened, evidently.
Is Debbie here? Uh, I owe her some money.
No, uh, she quit this morning.
She quit? Just like that.
Found this note on the door.
Said that her boyfriend's moving to Denver, and she's going with him and she doesn't know when she'll be back.
I was her best friend.
She didn't say a word to me.
There's something wrong with this.
Look Look at that smudge.
This note was written by a left-handed person.
But Debbie is right-handed.
That's right.
She is.
I don't think Debbie wrote this note.
Where does she live? Right next door.
- I have the key.
- What do you care about this girl? I just wanna check it out, dear.
Well, make it fast, 'cause gotta get home.
We got chores to do and lovin' to make and [Cash Register Dings.]
What if she comes back and finds us? You ever think about that? [Chirps.]
What are you doin'? I think I'm thinking.
- That's the way you think? - [Chirps.]
If you wanna look around, look around like a normal person.
You're embarrassin'me.
I gotta live in this town.
I'm sorry, dear.
But something is wrong here.
It looks like she's had this bird her whole life.
She wouldn't just leave it behind, would she? How are you noticing this stuff? I don't know.
I'm just seeing things.
Can I be honest with you? I wish you would concentrate like this on your roofing work.
Yes, my beloved.
Pregnancy test.
Looks like she had a bun in the oven.
How do you know? Those two little lines there, that means positive.
See, you pee on that end.
[Groans.]
Wipe! Wipe, wipe! Wipe! Give me I need a wipe.
All right.
Relax.
Ew.
Broken glass.
Broken glass.
This table has been moved.
I think somebody was fighting in here.
You see this tape? There was a rug right here.
It's still sticky.
Okay, why would she leave all of her clothes behind, but take the rug? Cora.
L-I think this poor girl has been murdered.
[Laughing.]
[Beeping.]
Sheriff, are you sure it's safe? I hate bees.
Don't worry about the bees, Larry.
Ned's got 'em all rounded up.
They're fast asleep, I hope.
Sheriff? Sheriff, what do you think about the waitress? Well, I think, uh What do I think? I think she went to Denver to, uh, be with her boyfriend.
I told you! No, no, no.
Sheriff.
Sheriff.
What about the parakeet? And the And the missing rug? And, look.
Look.
Wait.
Look.
What about the note? I don't think she wrote this note herself.
See that, Sheriff? Mister I'm sorry.
I forgot your name.
So have I.
Jerry.
Jerry.
Jerry, it's not like it is on TV.
In real life, things are pretty much the way they seem.
For example, this looks like a drunk-driving accident.
Right? Well, that's exactly what it is.
He-He was drunk? Oh, yeah, drunk as a skunk.
Zisk, local hotshot, plowed through that fence into these bees and got stung about a hundred times.
Idiot.
Okay, Sheriff, here's my list.
He knocked over five of my honeycombs worth $400 apiece, plus 20 feet of my fence.
Who's gonna pay for all of that? I'm sure he's insured, Ned.
He better be.
That boy's a brat.
A drunken, spoiled brat.
He always has been.
I'm glad he got all stung and swollen.
Ned, uh, why don't you head up to Lookout Point and see what you can do about those hornets' nests? We got kids gettin'stung up there every day.
I'm goin'.
I'm goin'.
But that punk owes me money.
- The windows are up.
- So what? Why didn't he stay in the car? He was surrounded by bees.
I would havejust stayed put.
Yakkity-yak-yak.
What are you talkin' about? He probably panicked.
Like I said, he was really wasted.
L-I don't think so.
I saw him just a few minutes before 8:00.
He drove right past our house.
There was a branch in the road.
He swerved to avoid it.
His reflexes were perfect.
- He couldn't have been drunk.
- He wasn't drunk? He deliberately drove his car into this bee farm? - Why would anybody do that? - I don't know.
And Debbie Barnett isn't in Denver.
She's been murdered.
Have you seen a doctor about that bump? It's not the bump.
It's some kind of midlife crisis.
All of the sudden, he's not happy fixing roofs.
He's gotta be Captain America.
What is wrong with you? Well, he got beaned pretty hard on the head.
Huh.
We're printing up 4,000 of these.
I'm gonna have 'em put up.
We're gonna post them in post offices, truck stops and drugstores.
Wait, wait.
Why the drugstores? I figure he's gonna have to buy wipes sooner or later.
You know, Captain, the amnesia that you're describing to me is actually quite rare.
Maybe, but it's all we got.
I have no body.
He hasn't contacted us.
- He hasn't contacted Natalie.
- Yeah, and we've notified every hospital in the country.
There's no sign of him.
Doctor, if I'm right and Monk is out there and he doesn't know who he is, what can we expect? From a psychological standpoint, we'd be in uncharted territory.
Adrian would be in a complete dissociative state.
He would be like a pilot who's flying in the fog without any instruments.
He's gotta be scared to death.
But in a weird way, if he's not seriously hurt, this could actually help him.
See, Adrian has always had a problem detaching Yeah.
Iooking at himself objectively.
So if you're right, he could be out there right now meeting himself for the very first time.
- He's meeting himself? - Mm-hmm.
That can't be good.
Hey, Jerry? Jerry? Hey, Jerry! Could I, uh, talk to you a minute? I've been thinking about what you said this morning about Roger pretending to be drunk.
Now, we found some blood in his car.
It wasn't fresh.
It was from the night before.
He hurt himself before the crash someplace else.
Well, could be.
In the meantime, nobody's heard from Debbie Barnett.
Do you really think there's a connection? Well, what do you think, Sheriff? Hmm.
I'm gonna go over and talk to Roger, see what he has to say.
You wanna join me? Yeah.
Okay.
It's the biggest feed store in the county.
Roger's father-in-law owns it.
He lets Roger run it.
[Coughing.]
Uh, I don't wanna tell you what those bags smell like.
Well, that's exactly what they are.
That's fertilizer.
My God! My God, this is worse than drug trafficking.
You gotta nail this guy.
- Sheriff.
- Roger.
How you feeling? Ah, you know, I'll be all right.
People always said I had a swelled head.
I guess they're finally right.
- What's he doing here? - You two met? - Yeah, you could say that.
- Well, this is Jerry, Cora's new husband.
He's been helping me out today.
Yeah, well, listen.
I know I did some damage out there, but tell Ned I'm gonna take care of it.
You know I'm good for it.
I was out there this morning.
From the tire tracks, it looked like you stopped, then turned around, and then then drove into that bee farm.
You mean on purpose? Are you kiddin'? You ever been stung 140 times? Because it's-it's no picnic.
Roger, you know Debbie Barnett, right? Yeah, sure.
Well, evidently, she left town without telling anybody.
I just talked to her parents.
They're mighty worried.
You haven't been seeing her, have you, Roger? [Scoffs.]
Sheriff Bates, you're talking to a married man.
Did you know she was pregnant? How would I know that? You like Willie Nelson, Mr.
Zisk? Yeah, he's all right.
You are left-handed, isn't that right? Carl, who is this guy? Look, I got work to do.
Just educate this man, all right? You tell him who he's talkin'to.
He's the guy.
Let's call the captain.
What captain? I don't know.
Jerry, I like your style.
As a matter of fact, I've been looking for a deputy.
A deputy? The sheriff said I would make a great detective.
He said I was a natural.
He said he would sponsor me, help me with the application.
Well, forget that.
Cora Darling, I think he's right.
Listen.
[Cat Screeches.]
The truth is, I don't like myself very much.
I have all these strange habits.
I'm nervous all the time.
But when I was there today at the scene of the crime, suddenly it all made sense.
Things were clicking in my head.
Click, click.
I'm not livin' with a cop.
I hate cops.
You're a roofer, understand? - Conversation's over.
- Yes, darling.
- I told you to stop dreaming.
- Yes.
Now, sit down here.
You trust me, don't you? I love you.
And You love me.
Say it.
I love you.
I'll meet you in the bedroom.
[Knocks.]
I've been waiting a long time for this.
What about our honeymoon? Oh, yeah.
I forgot about that.
That was magical.
Sit down right here.
And put your hands like this.
Now, lean in.
Trudy.
Trudy.
The name's Cora.
I'm sorry.
I'm remembering something.
Uh, there's a woman.
I think I'm having an affair with a woman named Trudy.
I forgive you.
Yeah.
I think I love her.
I don't care.
The truth is, I'm-I'm not so attracted to you.
Whatever.
The truth is, um, you sort of terrify me.
Hey.
There's no such thing as a perfect marriage.
Right.
All right, look.
This is my fault.
It's too much pressure.
Let's-Let's get out of here.
We'll be spontaneous, huh? Hey, I know.
Let's go to Lookout Point.
That's where all the kids go.
Oh, no, no.
We can't.
No.
Remember? The sheriff said, uh, they were having a problem up there with the bees and the hornets.
Everybody's getting stung.
Cora.
Should I lie down? I think I just solved the case.
Great.
Thank you.
Natalie! Natalie, hey.
We found him.
Is he okay? We're not sure.
A trucker saw one of the flyers, called in, said he dropped him off in Wyoming sometime yesterday.
Wyoming? Yeah, it's a little town called Purnell.
It's in the middle of nowhere.
The F.
B.
I.
's loaning us a jet, and we can be there in two hours.
Okay.
Okay.
Wait.
Is he sure? Was it really Mr.
Monk? The trucker gave the guy a five-dollar bill, and the guy kept smoothing it out.
Oh, he's alive! Ooh! [Man On Radio, Indistinct.]
[Buzzing Loudly.]
[Yells.]
There's a There's a bee in-in the car.
Well, there's about 20,000 of them out here, and they don't like visitors.
Here.
Put this on.
There you go.
One size fits all.
How's that feel? [Yells.]
Try to relax.
That's the most important thing.
Bees and hornets can smell fear.
The more nervous you get, the sweeter you are to them.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
There you go.
Jump in there.
Easy does it.
There you go.
Don't panic, now.
Don't move fast.
Get your arm in there.
Good.
Yeah.
I got it.
I got it.
Sweet as candy.
Put your arm in there.
That's good.
It's all good.
Sheriff, we got something.
[Monk Gasping, Grunting.]
We found her.
County coroner's on his way.
Poor kid.
How did you know where she was? Uh, it just seemed obvious.
Obvious to you.
Yeah.
Here's what I think, uh Happened? Yeah.
Yeah.
See, you were right about Debbie and Roger Zisk.
They were having an affair.
[Chirping.]
On Friday night, she must have told him she was pregnant.
She probably threatened to tell his wife.
And that was something Roger just couldn't allow.
He brought the body up here to dump it.
But he forgot about the bees.
Ow! They probably stung him a hundred times.
And now, Roger had a problem.
Eventually, somebody was gonna find Debbie's body here surrounded by bees, and when they did, they might remember that Roger showed up the next day covered with bee stings.
How would he explain that? He had to get stung again, this time in public [Engine Revving.]
So that he could explain the bee stings.
Ow! Help! Help! Somebody get 'em off me! He had guts.
I'll give him that.
Mm-hmm.
You figured all that out? What department are you with? Actually, I'm a roofer.
I'm just glad to h-help out.
Excuse me, uh, is your gun loaded? Yeah.
Could you do me a favor? Could you kill me, please? Why didn't you just stay in the car? There's a bee in the car! There's a bee in the car.
I'm gonna wake up the judge.
Then I'm gonna wake up Mr.
Zisk.
L I work with you.
I work with all of you.
You're a detective.
You're a great detective from San Francisco.
- You were married to a woman named Trudy.
- Yes, I know about Trudy.
- Natalie.
- That's right.
- I bet you have a million questions.
- Yes, I do.
What's-What's my name? Adrian.
No, really.
What-What's my name? Adrian.
Really? Yeah.
Okay.
- Mr.
Monk? - Sheriff.
If you're looking for a job, my offer's still good.
I appreciate it, but I have to get back to San Francisco.
I have a life, more or less.
Well, don't be a stranger.
I mean, to yourself.
That's good advice.
Here.
I missed you.
I missed you.
Cora.
[Sighs.]
Roof's leaking again.
You're a terrible roofer.
That's true.
I knew it wouldn't last.
You probably hate me.
No.
No, I don't hate you, Cora.
I'm not pressing charges.
You don't like me, though.
I don't know.
We haven't really met, have we? Monk? We gotta go.
[Baby Talk.]

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