Moonshine (2021) s01e02 Episode Script

1
Previously on "Moonshine."
My big sis, Lidia, is back in town.
My daughter's an anarchist,
my son's clinically depressed,
Uh, my marriage might be over.
Just a goddamn mess.
"I, Felicia Finley,
leave my piece of the Moonshine
to Lidia."
What?
You've always wanted what's mine.
This is how the war starts, Lidia.
"May she finally turn this shithole
into something worth a damn."
Hey, hey, Fox Den,
anyone in need of some
high octane, renewal juju?
Life needs a kick in the ass?
Well, you're in luck, losers,
because it is summer solstice time.
With a pink hotel ♪
In some towns,
virgins drink from magical wells.
Other towns turn druid
and dance around giant stones.
My town feeds its sins to a goat,
and they barbecue the poor bastard
in a quest for sweet,
sweet absolution.
That's right, it is time
for the Moonshine's
annual anything-goes, Goat Roast.
The time of year when you,
your loved ones,
even that sexy tent buddy
whose name you can't remember,
get to beach-party 'til ya barf.
What's that? Nothing to hide?
No sordid sins to absolve?
Fresh out of crack pipe confessions?
Then, giddy up, still plenty
of time to make some mistakes.
Hey, farmer, farmer,
put away that DDT now ♪
Gimme spots on my apples ♪
But leave me the birds
and the bees ♪
Absolutely not!
That's not what we discussed!
No! I don't care! I don't
care what you're saying!
Absolutely not!
That you don't know what
you've got 'til it's gone ♪
You paved paradise
and put up a parking lot ♪
Less wanking, more working!
You're both late!
And the big yellow taxi
took away my old man ♪
Daniel, hey.
Yeah. I-I know. Sorry.
Uh, signals for shit. Hold on.
They paved paradise,
put up a parking lot ♪
Somebody's happy.
Dingo in a donut box.
Or there's a body out back.
I put her in charge this weekend.
Of my goat roast?
Oh, you're on bed rest.
Besides, we're too old
to absolve sins.
- People change.
- We're not people.
Hold on, hold on. Can you hear me now?
Okay, I think I got ya. Ugh!
Have you told the kids
about the separation?
No, and do not say I'm avoiding.
The girls have been avoiding
each other since the memorial.
This weekend should be fun.
Lidia and goats. No, not her speed.
It's gonna be a bloodbath.
I just don't understand
what you're still doing there.
This is where I need
to be right now, okay,
in control of my own destiny,
taking care of my mom,
supporting my family
Having them support me.
I really think it's gonna be
different this time!
Ah! No! Call you back.
Rhian! No! No! No!
You knocked that down,
you stupid yellow
It's my life, it's my life ♪
It's my life, my life ♪
It's my life, it's my life ♪
It's my life, my life ♪
There's no way I'm staying here.
There is, and you are.
Didn't even bring my retainer.
Well, luckily teeth
don't move very fast.
This is a hostage situation.
A legit kidnapping. I'm calling Dad.
Your father is swamped at the office,
and he agrees this is the best
place for you, this summer.
What about what I want?
What's there to do here?
What's not to do?
Um, finish my doc about the
exploitation of sex workers
on the Lower East Side?
Find another cause.
You okay?
At least happy-adjacent-slash-
not hating me?
Yeah, it's fine, Mom.
Look, I know this is a lot,
and I kinda sprung it on you,
but I want you guys to
experience this place
like I did back before, I dunno,
I resented the shit outta
everything my Mom did, too.
I don't resent you, Mom.
I don't resent you, Mom.
Finn, you are free to resent me.
It's a healthy and normal part of
Shutting up now.
Bacon or sausage?
What part of ovo-lacto vegetarian,
- do you not understand?
- God!
I can piss and hit a
mark at 15 feet, Ilene.
Ugh.
Maybe we need to uh,
get the hell outta Dodge?
Why?
Uh, because we live in a campground?
It's close to work. Like, on work.
It's true, it is super convenient.
But still, just weird, you know,
like your family's around,
all the time.
And I don't like the way
that Rhian talks to you.
She's just, you know,
super intense about the job.
It's just, I was thinking,
the apartment over the
Fluff 'N' Fold is for rent.
- One-eye finally got evicted?
- Yeah.
- Did I call that, or what?
- Yeah. You did.
But like, think about it.
We could have like,
a private backyard, and a shower
that isn't directly over
the shitter. Blinds.
Those digs are sweet,
but with what money?
Well, maybe we could sell the shrooms,
and then use the money
for first and last months.
With a bit left over to celebrate.
- Sure!
- You wanna get back in?
- I think I missed a spot.
- Oh, yeah,
it's just that I'm serious,
babe, because that apartment
isn't gonna be around forever,
so we need to harvest
the shrooms and start selling.
Okay, right after the goat roast.
I dunno, I'm not sure that I like
competing with a farm animal, Ry.
I promised my Mom I'd help.
Hmm. Can your Mom give you a blowjob?
Harvest time it is!
Woo!
Why aren't you at the station?
Uh, Ken asked me to check up
on security protocols
for the weekend.
Dad said "security protocols"?
And uh, I thought we could talk.
We talked at breakfast.
I thought of more things to say.
- Well?
- Over dinner, maybe?
Date night? No time.
Where is little Miss
Inheritance when the inbreds
in Cabin 5 turn their coffee
maker into a bong?
On top of the trailer,
where you left her all morning.
There will be time for sustenance
when the war is won, by me.
And remember whose side you're on.
I want peace. I wanna be friends.
We're sisters,
the opposite of friends.
- That's not a thing.
- Number 36.
Do not be friends with Lidia. Happy?
Uh, well, technically,
technically, I'm your boss, now.
Dad told me he asked you
to organize the weekend
and I'm fine with that.
I have a goat to pick up.
Oh! Well, come on, let us help,
me and the kids. Show us the ropes.
I barely remember the last time
I fed a sin to a goat.
1996. Lust Monkey.
Okay, fair. Mm-hmm.
But that was many sins ago,
and I-I'd like to
make up for lost time.
Rhian? Come on, seriously,
let's work together.
No fighting, no ego.
But I'm in charge?
Pinky swear.
- Staff meeting at noon.
- Okay.
So, who would like to climb the roof
and spend the day scraping
bird excrement?
Definitely Lidia.
- You're hilarious.
- Ryan, it is!
- That'll take all day!
- Better not,
'cause you're scraping down
the rental boats next.
I am also enforcing a strict
no-bare-feet-rule this year.
The last thing we need
is some drunk asshole
suing us for slicing off
a toe with broken glass.
Isn't barefoot kind of a vibe?
Yeah, I'm not really into the whole,
wear-shoes-on-the-beach, thing.
Like, sand in shoes, shoes
in cabins, sand in cabins.
And next thing you know,
I'm on my hands and knees
with a vacuum hose, for like, hours.
- Yeah!
- That is literally your job.
Some of us have lives outside
of this place, Rhian.
Dreams. Housing options?
- Heartwarming story. Moving on.
- Why so many changes?
Things have been running fine
for the past 40 years, right.
Potluck, people pay what
they can. We pony up a goat,
- and a few kegs.
- One keg, domestic,
is all we can afford. Questions?
- Hmm.
- Anybody else?
Um, I once paid three grand
for a back to nature retreat
in the Hamptons.
Everyone slept under the stars
- to reconnect with the Earth.
- And we care about
the adventures of some
rich asshole, why?
We could turn our lack of,
into a plus.
No Wi-Fi. We call it off-grid.
Limited supplies.
It's called a cleanse.
Feeding sins to a goat.
- Spiritual healing.
- Ooh!
With a bit of a re-brand,
we could charge more.
Get a few wristbands, Coachella it up.
Could solve our cashflow issues.
- See? Sammy gets me.
- Yeah, hippie chic.
- Whole new clientele.
- Uh, clientele?
Ooh, frickin' fancy!
- I bet they tip large.
- Yeah!
Do you think we could get it
together by the weekend?
Oh, my firm did dozens of pop-ups.
I could call my suppliers.
Bit of high-end décor,
drop a few viral hints,
hipsters love last minute.
- Great! Show of hands?
- Oh, yeah!
You responded to my lady dick pic
with a fist bump emoji?
I'm sorry, I-I just, I feel like
- Taking your pants off?
- Okay.
I know I made a ten-year
mistake marrying Rhian,
and I know that you wanna wait
for the right time to tell her,
but all this sneaking around,
I just don't know
if I can do it anymore.
Okay. Bye.
My producer's gonna be back
soon, anyway, so.
That's it?
I don't wanna put you in a situation
that makes you feel bad
because the guilt
is gonna make you spill
your feelings all over town,
and when news breaks
that Nora Finley-Cullen
is screwing her sister's husband,
who gets thrown in the lobster pot?
The champion slut,
or Mr. Squeaky Clean?
You're not a champion slut.
I better be. Do you think that you're
the only married guy I've slept with?
- I'm not so squeaky clean.
- Prove it.
Wah! Okay.
Flashlight dream ♪
Peaches and cream delight ♪
Roxy Roller ♪
Hey, Terry!
Five-bob job, she gets
bubble gum on her knees ♪
Roxy Roller ♪
Beautiful day!
Whatever you're on, it's working.
Optimism, spunk,
an entire can of dry shampoo.
I figured out a way to make
the goat roast profitable this year.
Ah! A pissing contest with Rhian.
No! I'm trying to help,
and I hope you will, too.
Have you discussed this with Mom?
You know how much she loves change.
Yeah, I don't wanna bother her
- 'til the details are ironed out.
- Coward.
She exhausts me.
I'm confident Mom
will eventually accept
that without change, comes bankruptcy.
Did you know they're six months
behind on water bills
and it's gonna cost 150K
to replace the septic?
Hmm, pass!
Please!
Come on, I need you
to read this on air.
"Feeling baaa-d?
Come to the Moonshine,
feed your sins to our goat,
and discover your Inner Goddess."
This is some major bullshit.
You know what's some major bullshit?
You being too cool to ever
care about anything.
- I care about things.
- Such as?
Parmesan crackers, uh, these boots.
- Hmm, sex?
- Hmm, right.
Top secret married lover man.
Are you judging?
No, but I am a little curious.
Have you ever considered
his poor, unsuspecting wife?
What does this have to do with goats?
Absolution of sins, babe.
A man's choice to cheat
on his wife is my sin, why?
All alone.
Shifting through the shards
of a toxic marriage.
Breaking her children's hearts,
forced to start a new life
amidst impossible odds.
You're the wife?
Daniel cheated,
and that's why you stayed.
Maybe.
Which is why you should feel
super charitable and help me,
before Rhian shivs me in my sleep.
Okay, pharmacist said
to take these with food.
- Wine doesn't count.
- Grapes are a fruit.
Did you know Eleanor
is planning to go back to New York?
All packed up, ready to bolt.
You haven't told the kids
about the separation, have you?
I will.
Days turn into decades, kiddo.
Just saying.
Lidia, I didn't expect
to see you still in town.
I decided to stay a bit longer.
You know, keep an eye
on the inheritance.
- Treat her mother like a child.
- My Mother should be in bed.
So, you're gonna be here
for the goat roast. Lovely.
So many sins, so little time!
You behind all these fun changes?
- Changes?
- Yeah, uh,
we decided to mix it up this year.
- We?
- Yeah, Goddess Fest.
Female empowerment. Love it.
I wanted to surprise you.
An estrogen-friendly
twist on weekend fun.
She never asks me when she
knows it's gonna piss me off.
How about you, Jill?
Need any sins absolved?
Oh, me and your Mom have been
feeding the same sins to goats
for three decades, now?
Oh yeah? How's that workin'
out for ya?
- Bea?
- Great.
Ah-ha. See? The Goddess will provide.
Best year ever. We are gonna
absolve so many sins.
Even yours, Mom.
How long is she staying?
Oh, she'll be tired of us and
back to New York soon enough.
Yeah, well, you let me know
if you need any help with that.
It'd be a shame if she got in the way
of our little arrangement.
Hi, little goatie!
Oh, my gosh, she's so cute!
Demon eyes, but cute.
Mean mothers. They will eat anything,
if they are hungry enough.
Very territorial,
just like that skinny blonde
one back at the farm,
clearly trying to move in
where she doesn't belong.
Wish I could take
her back to New York.
When is your mom going home, anyway?
No clue, but I'm out of here
as soon as Dad sends money
for a plane ticket.
So, why a goat?
Oh, you know "scapegoat."
It was your grandma's idea,
when we were kids.
We could choose one thing
we wanted to erase that year,
and then have one hell of a feed.
What do we feed it?
Oh, no, it feeds us.
We roast it on the fire.
It's delicious.
Well, first, we string it up,
and then we,
you know, bleed it up.
You wanna murder, then eat,
this beautiful creature
after it's helped absolve your sins?
No body, no crime.
Guard this with your life.
We need to stop the
senseless goat slaughter.
Yeah, right after the fish massacre.
There's blood on our hands
if we let them
- go through with this.
- We can call PETA.
The local chapter's like, one guy,
- and he's a total dick.
- Oh.
Uh, okay, so what's your plan, then?
We paper the town with posters,
like really blood ones
of slaughterhouses.
We block the gates with a protest.
Man, if we make enough noise,
like, we could go viral.
Liberate the lobsters, the goats,
- and our souls.
- Huh.
I was hoping to find a Finley-Cullen!
Wasn't me!
Hey, how does a newbie get
a tour of this place?
I wish I could oblige.
Four hands make swift work.
No better way to know a place.
Never been much of a relaxer.
Seagulls and algae, man!
Some day, they'll be our overlords!
- I'm Ryan.
- Oscar.
So, Moonshine been busy this summer?
Same old. Hopin' to see some
new faces this weekend
if big Sis has got anything
to do with it.
- Lidia, right?
- One and only.
She deal with the uh, day-to-day?
Not yet.
That'd be my Mom and Dad.
Rhian's the big cheese.
Likes to boss me around,
that's for damn sure.
Must be expensive to run.
Really high margins aren't uh,
a thing in a seasonal business.
Yeah, I guess.
How do your folks keep
this place afloat, anyway?
Little side hustle they got goin'?
Sorry to pry. I would just hate to see
a place like this so special go under.
Nobody tells me shit
about the money stuff.
But that don't matter.
Just me and my girl,
we got our own thing.
Big payday, right around the corner.
Do tell.
- Can you keep a secret?
- To the grave.
Magic mushrooms! Organic, home-grown,
limited batch, psilocybin.
- Next gen high.
- Serious operation.
Mushies were my ticket to sobriety.
My higher power.
Sounds intense.
Like a lawnmower of truth,
man! Ha, ha!
- Big local market?
- Bro, it's the Moonshine.
It's the Wild West, anything goes,
and everyone's invited.
Of course.
Hello, hello.
Growing up big
and strong, aren't ya?
Yes you are! Oh, you're doing so
Moonshine.
No, I don't know anything
about a Goddess.
This is a campground,
not a colon cleanse.
Goat? Yes, we have a goat!
Demon whore!
Oh, hey. Too low?
I didn't approve this.
Oh, come on,
you're not seriously upset
- about a little décor.
- Pinky swear?
- I'm in charge?
- If guests are paying extra,
- they're gonna expect extra!
- There's more?
A yurt. What?!
A pop-up juice bar,
hmm, flower-scented edibles.
How are we paying for all of this?
Suppliers get paid when we do.
Yeah, I know, we're still in the hole
- for the lobsters your kid stole.
- Rhian, chill.
We already have 50 confirmed bookings.
Hold this a sec?
Okay.
Woo!
Ryan, the oldest son,
- running drugs off the property.
- Heroin? Meth?
Is this tied to the missing
shipping containers
- out of the Port of Halifax?
- Not sure.
Mushrooms, small crop,
but where there's smoke,
- there's fire.
- Shrooms aren't worth the shit
- they're grown in.
- Okay, granted,
Ryan is not the sharpest axe
in the woodpile.
Yeah, he's a drunk. Dozens of DUIs.
He's not capable of remembering
his middle name,
let alone masterminding
a smuggling ring.
Maybe, but with a little bit
of pressure, I can, you know
I need something concrete -
phone records,
double set of books, actual drugs.
Ryan's twin sister, Rhian,
she's in the know
and I get a vibe from her.
See? Strategy.
Go after the sister,
get her to trust you.
Yeah, all about the trust.
Get a real in, or I'm
bringing your scrawny ass home!
Hey!
When you're smiling ♪
The sun is shining hey, hey ♪
Looking good!
Okay, testing, testing.
You love me.
Even shitshows need a soundtrack.
Oh, see, that's the spirit
of Goddess Fest,
everyone working together.
Female energy.
- Where do you want this?
- Uh, by the yurt.
You said yurt. Oh!
So, what's on-what's on the deck?
Oh, why, you think you're
gonna get to control this?
Well, a few requests.
A music person, you know that.
You can be the
Now I know why you wanted to talk.
- Rhian, look, I
- Admit it.
Admit what you've done.
Things haven't been good
between us for a long time,
okay? You and me, we just don't
Nope, we don't.
Which is why you
agreed to help Lidia
with her stupid idea?
Yes. Yeah, I-I did agree
to help move speakers
and carry yoga mats, but
What's that, clipboard?
My husband is sleeping with the enemy?
Rhian, we have a
situation at the gate.
This isn't over.
- Goats deserve justice!
- Get out of the way!
Meet goats! Not goat meats!
- This is utterly ridiculous!
- Goats deserve justice!
- Stop the slaughter
- Hey! What is going on!
Move!
You told me to find another
cause; I found one.
You're gonna upset your grandparents.
They should be upset.
They're serial killers.
Ugh, El, I know you're passionate,
and I respect that,
but this is tradition.
Not everyone objects
to eating goat meat.
Her name is Susan B. Anthony.
And my name is Mom,
you know, the woman
who grew you in my body,
and until you're 18,
has a say over what you do
and do not have control over?
You know, maybe she's right, El.
Yes, yes, I am right. Thank you, Finn.
You want me to abandon
the cause you told me to get?
Just go put your flower crown on.
Come on, move!
Thank you!
Mom's precious little suck up.
Let's get out of here.
Not cool, bro.
- Come on.
- It's about time.
Lidia you need a drink?
Yes, I do!
Cheers!
Ugh, I've raised socially conscious,
compassionate citizens.
It's a total nightmare.
You're gonna same some sage,
vaguely insulting thing
about women in full moons, aren't you?
Yeah, probably.
Rhian hates me.
Yeah, there's your sin. Self pity.
More like, stupidity,
thinking I could just
roll back into town
and the past would be forgotten.
Maybe you and Rhian
should just have it out,
- once and for all.
- Funny advice from a pacifist.
Well, I've had my share of squabbles.
You? Please!
Oh, I've earned my mellow.
Ugh, another fight with Rhian
is the last thing I need right now.
I-I have to believe
it's all gonna be fine,
that this weekend will be
a huge success,
that the spirit of Goddess Fest
will prevail, and
Whoa!
- Hey! Watch it!
- Bring it, bitch.
Whoa!
Have you seen my clipboard?
Uh, no?
Agh! Frig!
Have you checked out Goddess Fest?
It is so cool!
All hail, La Lidia!
We are gonna move so much product!
I have to talk to you.
Okay, no, you know what?
I'm so glad that you said that,
um, because I wanna be
sensitive to your needs.
I know that this is the only place
that you have ever lived,
but I promise you,
we're gonna make that
apartment a real home!
It's not that.
Did something go
wrong with the harvest?
- We screwed up!
- How?
Even if we sell the stash at a premium,
street value's for shit
on mushies these days.
- Who says?
- My new buddy, Oscar.
Oh. Hey, should we be telling people
about our illegal mushroom
growing operation?
No, no, Oscar's not just
people, he's a mensch!
He's real smart and he says,
meth or smuggling is where it's at.
How could we not know that?
Like, I thought that you did research
before we bought all of the equipment.
No-no. I thought you did.
Hmm.
Wow, that was my whole life savings.
I haven't even replaced
my hair extensions since May.
Babe.
You know what? It's fine,
because it is a little setback,
but we can fix it.
Yeah, we, yeah, we can!
- Crush it like a bug!
- Yeah! Ugh!
- How?
- Oh, I have no idea.
- You hidin' out?
- Yep!
Ground Zero, Goddess Fest.
Bunch o' lawyers who spend
hundreds of dollars on stained jeans,
20-year-olds wearin'
Woodstock t-shirts.
With some big city bullshit.
Yeah, it's cultural appropriation.
- It's a distraction.
- Yeah, that's it.
Lidia's really rallied the troops,
everyone's working together.
She hasn't told the kids
she and Daniel are separating.
It isn't healthy.
That's right, keepin'
secrets from your kids
and not talkin' about your
feelings, is unhealthy.
I shoulda sent
Lidia packing after the wake.
This isn't the place for her.
Tell it to the goat.
- Hi.
- Hi!
You inspired me.
At first, I was thinking
face painting,
but face tattoos are really
having a moment.
- Who knew?
- The Goddess did!
I have manifested 50 bucks,
already. Ah!
Get your-your Vishnu tramp stamp!
Get your Venus butt roses!
Make your face the constellation!
Give one sin slip
and a pencil to each guest,
- please and thank you.
- What's your sin, Mom, kidnap?
Accessory to goat murder?
Lying about your Botox?
It's for my headaches.
Interesting crowd. Nobody's puked yet.
- One sin slip.
- Thank you.
- Where is my clipboard?
- I have no idea.
Theft of personal property can
result in immediate expulsion.
Moonshine By-Law 65.
Do not walk away from me!
You need to chill.
Peace, love, and goat slaughter.
Remember?
Is this a game to you? Pass "Go"?
Get out of jail, free?
Steal my ding-dang office supplies?
Unresolved trauma,
number one cause of addiction.
- Piss off, Ryan.
- On it!
Hey, have either of you guys
seen the goat?
Yeah, tied up, where I left it.
No! Escapee, maybe. Hard to say,
but given the fact that
it's gone, I'd say it's gone.
Did you steal the goat, too?
Don't be absurd!
What's next, Mom and Dad's love?
- My husband?
- You know, there's meds for this.
Oh yeah, that's right,
I'm crazy. Crazy Rhian!
You got braces, what did I get?
Not therapy. Anything that
goes wrong with Lidia,
it's all bow down,
but when it's me, bananas,
overwrought, unable to conceive!
You are clinical.
Maybe, but this is my asylum,
Princess!
- No!
- Whoa!
Two decades of Pilates. Try me!
- Oh, yeah?
- Hold that!
- Okay.
- Oy, oy, oy!
Get away from me!
If you'd like to catch two
psychos going at it,
- come on down to the lodge!
- Shut up! Shut up!
Two full-grown women fighting,
at a nice celebration of the
Hey, you bunch of stuck up posers,
do you know what this is?
This is loser fest!
You're all delusional!
Watch it! My shit!
Get her!
- This one wasn't me.
- I wasn't even there.
- Oh, boo hoo, Saint Sammy.
- Eat me.
- They started it.
- Okay, fine, it's my fault.
Happy? But in all fairness,
I tried to keep you out of it.
Oh, quit sucking up and
tell me who stole my goat?
Probably Eleanor.
Poor thing, having to witness
her grown aunts and uncles
Seriously? Parenting advice?
Look how we turned out.
Uh, speak for yourself.
Admittedly, I have a few issues.
Okay, Rhian is right,
no goat, no goat roast.
No goat roast, no income.
We're gonna be tits-deep
in guests demanding refunds,
and I know nobody wants
to see my tits.
Where are we gonna find another goat
on a holiday weekend?
I have an idea.
Okay, keeping an open mind.
Do you remember last year,
when I was unjustly robbed
- of the title of Lobster Queen?
- No.
I wore the sexy Bo Peep costume.
- Oh! No.
- It was on Facebook.
- We're not friends, remember?
- I do.
Oh, can you get to the point?
We-we have a crowd waiting,
and it's a few hours 'til sunset.
My Bo Peep sheep is hollow.
Plenty of room for sins.
And I looked super hot
in my costume, by the way.
On Chinese New Year, in Central Park,
we send hollow paper dragons out
over the Jackie Onassis Reservoir.
What's that, you lived in New York?
You've never mentioned that before.
We'll float the sins out over
the great oceanic beyond,
instead of burning them
in the hell fire
of charred animal flesh.
I can work with this!
My turn!
Okay, people, bit
of spiritual improv, here.
We'll be feeding all sins
to a paper sheep,
which will then float out
over the ocean,
where hopefully some poor
seal doesn't choke to death.
Drone DVDs, 20 bucks.
Witness the celebration from
the eye of the Goddess herself!
You almost sold that.
Not the most subtle remodel, Lids.
- People seem into it.
- Yeah, they're high.
Oh I know. It's my add-on,
Flower of the Goddess edibles. Right?
Hey, did you get a couple?
Whoa.
You emancipated the goat.
Way to hostage release!
Wasn't me.
You let the goat out?
While you guys were complaining,
I actually did something about it.
- Anarchy in action.
- Dude, you are insane.
- Here.
- I'm on duty.
Oh, you'll do things when
Lidia asks, but not me?
Please, Terry, just do it!
Come on, she's giving out
more than me!
Oh, frig's sakes!
Don't let him bite you.
Happy now?
- Oh, Rhian!
- I don't have time to fix
- your plumbing again right now.
- No. No-no-no,
I just wanna say,
great job with all this.
Your siblings speak
very highly of you.
Wrong Rhian.
Oh, that looks so cute!
I listen to the wind,
to the wind of my soul ♪
Where I'll end up, ♪
Well, I think only God
really knows ♪
Oh, there he goes!
Wow!
And there they go, people,
all your sins.
God speed.
So beautiful!
Whoa
I'm kinda diggin' this.
Yeah.
Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
I gotta get the drone footage!
Get your sexy pilot on, babe!
I listen to my words,
but they fall far below ♪
Wooo!
Ryan, you missed the launch!
Look. You're flying too low.
I need a shot up over the water.
Don't think you get how hard this is,
especially when you're really,
really trippin' on mushrooms.
- Give it to me.
- Oh!
Bon voyage, goat.
Yeah, this stick is the, yah.
Oh, no, no. No, no, no, no
Oh! Oh, shit!
Shit.
I let my music take me
where my heart wants to go ♪
The sins!
Ooh, the Goddess is not happy.
Eat your heart out, Fellini.
I'll never, never, never, never ♪
I'll never make the same mistake ♪
I'll never, never, never, never ♪
I think this is your wife's!
Ew!
Then who is my father?
What kind of psycho hates avocados?
What is this one?
No way!
You aren't gay?
Oh, God!
The clientele would like a word.
Sorry, here.
Still beautiful, though.
This is part of the experience.
I knew it! I knew it!
I've had enough. Stop it! No!
Terry?
Your sin is safe with me.
Gimme that! Gimme that! Gimme that!
What?
What did it say?
What did it say?!
Uncle. Fine! Damn it!
I'm sleeping with your husband.
Oh!
That actually wasn't what I wrote.
But yeah, I'm sleeping with Nora.
I'm sorry, I-I tried to tell you.
The goat came back!
The is all your fault.
- Ahh!
- Oh, my God!
Waaaaaaah!
- Ahhhhhhhh!
- Oh, Rhian!
Oh, hey.
Hey.
What do you want now?
A kidney?
Oh, I just wanted to tell you that
everyone's out looking for the goat.
You know, to see if maybe
they can retrieve
- Stop talking.
- Okay.
Oh, um, I found this!
Would you mind adding
something for me,
please? My finger, you know.
Yes, of course, of course.
Okay.
- Number 43
- Mm-hmm.
- D-i-e.
- Mm-hmm.
I like your clipboard.
Beat it. Please.
I mean it. My boss mocks me.
I'm an analog guy - lists, laminate,
nothing gets me going like
a swift checkmark.
Got passed over twice by I.T. yes-men.
Hard to hold on to your values
in a digitized world.
Also, I'm really sorry
about your finger,
and everything else.
Rough day?
Yeah. Been there.
Anyway, if there's anything
you could ever need,
you know where to find me.
With your mother on the left ♪
Your daddy on the right ♪
Nothin' in the middle
but a bare-knuckle fight ♪
You're dizzy all day,
lookin' side to side ♪
Yeah. Oh no, yeah!
Oh
- Yeah.
- Okay.
So, just, yeah, be in-be in touch.
- Who's that?
- Oh, that guy?
He works at the casino in Halifax
and he might even have a job for me!
Blowjob, maybe.
Ryan, he saw my tattoo business,
and was admiring my
entrepreneurial spirit.
It wasn't your spirit
he was staring at!
That guy makes 40 grand a year.
I mean, that kinda money,
he can give people jobs.
He can have his mother over for tea.
You know what?
That's gonna be us someday!
That is gonna be us someday!
That's gonna be us someday!
Us someday, us someday!
Again, we are so sorry.
Here, take that complementary
pass for next year.
How bad is it?
Bad.
Are we talking bad,
next week will be better,
or bad, I need to rob a bank?
Look, we'll stick together,
and it'll all work out, right.
New day.
Said no Finley-Cullen, ever.
Dodged that genetic bullet, remember?
Which means, it's my job
to keep the rest of you
from losing hope.
Family fixer.
- Love you, Sammy.
- Love you, too.
Go, I got this.
Try to get along together ah ah ♪
Rubber band brains
all made of clay ♪
You want to whisper words
that would try to explain ♪
I'm not offering any parenting advice.
I can be easy ♪
I can be easy ♪
- Any sign of the goat?
- Nope.
At least someone's free.
Yeah, I um
actually, wanted to talk
to you about that,
why we didn't go back
to New York with your Dad.
You guys are getting
a divorce, aren't you?
No.
I don't know. Maybe.
This is a separation while
we try to figure things out.
- Don't you love him anymore?
- Oh, honey, of course I do.
But I married your dad
when I was really young,
And, you know,
before I knew what I wanted,
or who I really was.
Who are you?
I'm your Mom.
And I love you very much.
Well, I'm still stranded here.
How 'bout you, kiddo?
My family's insane.
Yeah.
Wanna talk about it?
I told Michael
I'd go play video games so.
Okay.
Oh.