On My Block (2018) s01e03 Episode Script

Chapter Three

1 [SLOW POP MUSIC PLAYING.]
Knew it.
Get out the way! [IMITATES ENGINE SOUND.]
They want to know Let's show them all Let's make a scene Let's play along I want to feel the way you feel How do you feel? Let's take it slow Let's spend the night Let's keep it real And these emotions Tell me do you See us going all the way? And I'd be lying If I didn't say you've been You've been on my mind Tell me do you think of me [WOMAN OVER PA.]
Attention, students.
One last reminder to buy your tickets to tonight's Homecoming Dance.
A magical evening full of wonder, excitement, and romance can be yours for only 10.
99.
[CELL PHONE BEEPS.]
[GIRL.]
Mark, was that you? Romance, really? You want to encourage So, you going? - Yeah.
Do you - Do you [LAUGHS.]
- You go first.
- Do you need any underwear? - What? - Your mom's at Costco.
Um - I'm good.
- Okay.
Also, they ran out of your gummy vitamins, so your mom got you small, easy to swallow pills.
That cool? - Okay.
- [WOMAN OVER PA.]
However, this is not an opportunity to get freaky.
Remember: if you're not responsible, you'll end up with responsibility.
So, there will be no twerking, yiking, getting crunk, lit, or turnt.
For all you ladies, dress appropriately.
Nobody wants to see your lower butt cheeks.
Man, that's some bullshit! Did you hear that? Did you hear, no butt cheeks.
You know how many squats I do for these nalgas? Come on, people, no butt cheeks? And last but not least: no ID, no entrance.
No exceptions.
- [BELL RINGS.]
- That's my cue.
Got to roll.
Just a few more minutes.
I have a chem quiz.
How about later? Fifth period? Can't miss trig.
Sixth? - I could sneak out for ten minutes.
- Hey, so, tonight, will you dance with me? Of course.
I'll dance with you.
And Ruby and Jamal like always.
What about just me? Like a slow dance? No, no, no.
Hm-mmm.
Not like a slow dance.
A slow dance.
[CHUCKLES.]
- No, no slow dancing.
- Why? - Because we've never done it before.
- So? We've been doing a lot we've never done before.
Friends don't slow dance.
Especially friends dodging rumors they've smashed.
Oh, come on, it's just a dance.
Slow dances aren't just dances.
They're statements.
Let's just talk later.
Sixth period? Sure.
We can talk about how slow we're gonna dance, because it's going down.
She make a way So everything is all right But this I like Shit.
[RUBY.]
Olivia only sees me in a certain way.
To her, I'm "Inside Ruby," the guy she's forced to live with and buy underwear for.
Tonight, I got to show her that I can be "Outside Ruben," the guy who not only knows how to make killer chilaquiles, but can sexify a lady on the dance floor.
Tonight, I will redefine our relationship.
Awesome.
Happy for you.
So, while you and Cesar are getting sexified on the dance floor That's not what I'll be doing.
Whatever.
I just wanna know where I am in this situation.
- I don't know.
- Aha! Exactly! Because you both always forget about me! - We don't forget you.
- We ignore you.
- You gotta leave the cane at home.
- Not a cane.
It's a pimp stick.
Even worse.
Hey, do I crap on your accessories? No.
Do I think necklaces are tacky on dudes? Yes.
But I keep that to myself.
So you keep doing you with that tacky chain, and I'm gonna roll with my pimp stick that I need for my foot injury.
That isn't real.
- Why you got to neg me? - Relax.
No one's gonna neg or forget you tonight, 'cause this ain't eighth grade anymore, boys.
It's no "timid hands off.
" It's all "confident hands on.
" 'Cause tonight, everyone's gonna get loose and bump And grind.
High school dances are the worst.
Really? Dances in Houston are dope, and great opps to meet dudes.
Take a look around.
Every hot prospect you see today is gonna be sporting wood tonight.
It's not pretty.
Or impressive.
Dances are basically sex fests.
- In a bad way? - Yes.
They can expose you.
- How? - You can get roofied or pregnant.
And I'm not just talking about getting it in on the dance floor, which happens all the time.
I'm talking about slipping on something suspect on the way to the bathroom, and boom, you're immaculately concepted.
That's why you gotta have protection on the ready.
One minute you're dancing next to some rando girl, the next, you're getting up and into your new "girlfriend.
" - Trying not to get the herp.
- Come on.
Hey, 39 percent of all cases come from school-sanctioned events.
CDC doesn't lie.
Like I said, a relationship can be made and redefined by one sexy jam.
You really think a slow dance can redefine a relationship? Where have you been? Dances aren't about dancing.
They're about making statements.
- Positive statements.
- Like peeing every time you jump.
That's what happens after you get prego.
Even if you don't keep it.
Goodbye, romance.
Hello, trauma.
Plus the DJ they hired is some lame hipster from Silver Lake.
DJ Snigglebottoms! He almost played Coachella, so he's obviously fire.
I don't know, man.
I just don't know if one dance matters that much.
Okay.
What about Sylvia and Jesus, huh? They barely knew each other last year before the fall dance.
Until he basically draped her.
- Draped? - Dance raped.
He was all over her.
- She was all over him.
In a trance.
- Like a prisoner.
He marked her like a piece of property so no other guy would touch her.
- Then she had no other option but to - fall in love.
Look at them.
They're so ride or die.
Stockholm syndrome.
[SIGHS.]
Tonight could be a game changer.
And our own personal hell.
I'm wearing indigo tonight.
I thought we should claim colors to avoid outfit clashes.
Indigo? Any objections? Oh, and my pants have red pockets.
I know, it sounds weird, but it works.
What are the pockets for? Roofies? So, what time should we meet? Yeah, let's get that in the books.
The more specific, the better.
What are you guys thinking, like 8:00? 8:05? 8:10? I'm gonna play it by ear.
I'm not sure I'm feeling it.
What? Why? Not sure I'm in the mood to be objectified.
If I want to see boners, I'll just go online.
Didn't you hear Principal Sarge? The dance is a no-bone zone.
Are you kidding? Dances are cesspools of bad behavior.
I don't want to go.
Yeah, people get freaky, but what's wrong with getting freaky? I don't get it.
Explain it to us.
Why don't you wanna go? You were pretty excited this morning.
That was before I remembered how lame dances are.
And maybe we're just not in the mood.
Oh, is it your menses? Her what? - Her lady pond has runneth red.
- Lady pond? - What? What am I saying wrong? - [BOTH.]
Everything! You guys don't understand what it's like to be a woman and treated like an object.
- We have hearts! - [OLIVIA.]
And minds.
So, take out any question that we're going tonight.
The answer is no.
With a period, 'cause that's what it's actually called.
Olivia, let's go dine in a less hostile environment.
You read my mind.
What just happened? [SIGHS.]
[BELL RINGS.]
Hey! Why are you dodging me? What you said at lunch really hit home.
I don't want to objectify you.
I was just I was just, like, talking about women in general.
- Not me personally.
- You don't have to back down.
I'm not backing down.
You don't need to tell me if I can or can't back down.
I'm fine! Okay, what if we skipped the stupid dance? My dad's on a long haul, which means that Are you objectifying me? [SCOFFS.]
I know what you're doing, and it's not cute.
No, it's not.
I'm not just your boy toy, Monse.
Maybe it's a good thing you're not going to the dance.
It is? Maybe I can find a girl who's interested in more than my body.
A girl who just likes to dance.
Slow.
- We should go to the dance.
- What? Why? Because we can't let him I mean, them win.
No way.
We need to stand our ground.
[SCOFFS.]
Which is why we can't sit at home.
We have to go.
I'm totally confused.
We're falling prey to the obvious argument, which is that we have to sit out to make a point.
But the point is, we go.
If we don't, they win.
Still confused.
How are they winning? By repressing us! By staying home, it's like they're putting us in emotional burkas, giving us no choice.
[MONSE SIGHS.]
I get it.
We need to shed the burkas and flaunt the boobs.
- Yes! Our body, our choice.
- [OLIVIA CHUCKLES.]
- We have to go.
And look sexy.
- But not for them, for us.
- So, I'm dressing for you.
- And I'm dressing for you.
- Once I figure out how to look sexy.
- It's a good thing you know me.
[RUBY.]
She doesn't know me! I'm a feminist.
I'm woke.
I never slut shame.
I even have a small collection of Susan B.
Anthony silver dollars.
So, if my girl's gonna stay home, I gotta support her and stay home too.
So, you're gonna let the girls' decision dictate yours? - It's our first high school dance! - There'll be other dances.
Besides, my parents and the twins are out tonight, so Olivia and I can kick it here and Outside Ruben can make an inside appearance.
I'm still part of this scenario, right? If you really wanna be Outside Ruben, you need to actually go outside and show Olivia what she's missing.
[VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRING.]
I say this from experience.
Nothing drives a girl crazier than knowing someone else is out there waiting for you.
Trust me! I don't know, man.
I think I should just stay home.
Good.
You can help me clean the bathroom.
The twins had an accident.
Although, it looks like it was on purpose.
Uh Sorry, Abuelita, but I'm going to the dance.
Yes! [CELL PHONE CHIMES.]
Um I got to take care of something for Spooky.
Meet you guys later.
Yeah, I should go, too.
What time do you want to meet so you guys don't forget me? For the last time, that's not gonna happen.
Just come back in half an hour.
Or wait, I'm doing a charcoal mask, better make it 45.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
I should do a nose strip, too.
Okay, let's say an hour to be safe.
I'll be back in 50.
[DOOR OPENS.]
[SIGHS.]
Hey.
I'm still going to the dance.
- I thought you had a right to know.
- Cool.
Also, I heard what you said about objectification and promise to respect you as a woman.
Awesome.
[SIGHS.]
Would you like some help with that? Not that you need it.
We both know you're the stronger gender.
I mean, you have to be for childbirth.
Not that you have to have children.
Fertility does not make a woman.
I would love some help, thanks, but I'm heading over to Monse's.
Do you have time to carry it over? Oh No.
I have to get ready.
- Then I'll see you there.
- Where, Monse's? - The dance.
- You're going? Yeah, we changed our minds.
We can do that.
I know.
I'm woke.
You can't declare yourself woke.
Someone needs to tell you.
Thank you.
Now I'm woke about being woke.
This has been so enlightening.
Should we all go to the dance together? [CHUCKLES.]
I thought you had to get ready? I'm a dude.
I'm always ready.
Oh.
I look dumb.
Nah, you look more awkward than devoid of intellect.
What? The dress looks great! It's just, she looks awkward in it.
You know how some people are really good at saying the right thing at the right time? Yeah.
You aren't one of those people.
Let me give you some pointers.
[RUBY.]
You're so enlightening.
[OLIVIA.]
I'm not suggesting I had to bubble up Just to double up, I had to - [OLIVIA.]
Just think.
- [RUBY.]
That's an excellent point.
- [OLIVIA.]
And then speak.
- [RUBY.]
I feel you.
Makes so much sense.
Bubble up, I had to double up I had to bubble up I had to double up I had to bubble up Now I'm going to win One thousand bitches in my cell phone You can hear the money in my dial tone We don't do first Get your cell phone Dee and me, baby I love them redbones Let's roll.
- Don't say anything stupid.
- I know.
I need a new outfit.
[SIGHS.]
You know what would look good with that top? Heels.
Don't open that! That's the only stuff she has of her mom's.
It's sensitive, a sad story that I can't get into.
Grabbed the wrong one.
I hate when that happens.
Okay, so her mom left when she was two, and she's not over it.
- But don't ever bring it up unless she - All right.
- Which one should I wear? - I think they all looked good on you.
Ruby? No, I'm not falling for this again.
Oh, come on.
You can't leave her hanging.
You just have to be honest and sensitive at the same time.
- It's really not that hard.
- Fine.
I think the one she's wearing now nicely accentuates her figure.
You mean her boobs.
Classy.
- I can't win! - Neither can I.
Screw this.
There's nothing different about this dance than any I've gone to before.
Since I've worn jeans every other time, I'm wearing jeans and my good hoodie.
If somebody doesn't like it, they can suck a butt.
Hi.
I'm just waiting for Ruby.
[BOTH LAUGH.]
Do you smell something? [SNIFFS.]
My Lady of Guadalupe.
I didn't know they came in scents.
[CHUCKLES.]
[MAN ON TV.]
with a new piece of information, and no You like to date the line? What? No, no, no, no, no.
authorities had their Oh, Dateline.
Oh, yeah, I'm all over that.
[CHUCKLES.]
[GIRL.]
How the hell? How can they just do that? Don't be nervous.
I'll be your boner blocker.
- What's happening? What is it? - Some bullshit is what it is! They cancelled the dance because of a fight.
Man, I mean, really? Two putas got into it in Life Skills yesterday, but we still managed to make soufflés.
A fight ain't nothin'! It wasn't just that.
Some fool pulled out a gun.
Who cares? It took me forever to get ready.
I even shaved my chocha for this.
And it was a two-man job.
Hey, what's going on? Dance got cancelled because of a gun.
I was actually really excited about it and ready to dance.
- Too bad.
- Yeah, it is too bad, huh? The night doesn't have to be a total waste.
My dad is still gone.
That is a great idea.
Yo, Monse's dad's out of town, so party at Monse's! [CHEERING.]
[GIRL.]
Yeah! Monse! You said you were ready to dance.
Oh, my God, why are the police doing this to him? He's white! Because he's poor.
[MAN ON TV.]
I'd never, ever cheat or date her.
- How's your restless leg? - Much better, thank you.
[CHUCKLES.]
I'm glad.
Ooh.
This is nice.
You know, it's hard to find a kindred spirit who thinks like me.
Someone who knows that the real story is always the story behind the story.
You know, like Steven Avery or Watergate or RollerWorld.
RollerWorld? - What do you know about RollerWorld? - Nothing.
I know you know something.
I shouldn't have brought it up.
Every time I talk about it, somebody tells me I'm stupid for believing that there could be money buried in the neighborhood.
The only people who are stupid are the ones who believe those two Santos robbed that place for 50,000 dollars.
It wasn't 50,000? [CHUCKLES.]
- Two-fifty.
- No! Sí.
The Prophets were using RollerWorld to wash the money.
The Santos didn't even know what they were getting themselves into.
- "Wash the money"? - Mm-hmm.
Oh, money laundering.
Is that how the war started between the gangs? Every story behind a story has a beginning.
- Then start there.
- Where? The beginning! [LAUGHING.]
She keeps talking and talking, but that's the thing: she don't say nothing.
Telling us how to dress appropriately for dances and stuff, like, "Oh, your skirt can't be shorter than your fingertips," which is mighty prejudicial to me because I have long arms, and she has short, stubby arms.
You know? - [WHISPERS.]
Help me.
- Should we throw him a bone? And get stuck in Jasmine's quicksand? We'll never get out.
Okay.
I'm getting another refill.
You want one? Yeah.
Hey, play something lit.
On it.
I know I know I serve you like a queen Show you things you've never seen That you've been blind to - 'Cause you're the song - [CELL PHONE CHIMES.]
That keeps on finding me Be right back.
The rhythm and the melody And I can't fight you 'Cause I don't really know you I don't know what to say I know that I could show you I'm hoping that you come my I counted it three times.
Trust me, it's all there.
- [OSCAR.]
I don't want any problems.
- I know.
I don't want any either.
[CELL PHONE BEEPS.]
Where's that from? - Ready for our dance? - Are you crazy carrying that around? - You're gonna get yourself killed.
- Don't worry about it.
Worry about this.
[GRUNTS.]
- Oh.
- [MONSE LAUGHS.]
[OLIVIA.]
Hey.
[MONSE.]
Hey! Perfect timing.
- Cesar, enough! I hate tickling.
- I'm sorry.
I had to leave that room.
Jasmine was threatening to show us her "two-man job.
" - Seriously, I'll cover my eyes.
- No.
You're saving me.
We were just being stupid.
Come here.
Thanks.
I definitely interrupted something.
[BOTH.]
Nope.
Nothing.
Just so you know, I keep shit private.
I don't gossip.
I'm all about that lock and key.
- [CHUCKLES.]
- No doubt.
But Monse and I are just friends.
Really? You guys seem like you'd be together.
Monse's out of my league.
So, you've never, ever thought of getting together? No.
Would never happen.
- Why? - He's not safe.
[ALL LAUGH.]
[OLIVIA.]
That's hilarious.
[MONSE.]
Totally.
I'm gonna go grab a shot.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- [MAKES AIRPLANE NOISE.]
- [CHUCKLES.]
I know if I had that much cash, I wouldn't bury it.
I'd buy the new Jordans and probably a new metal detector.
And if there was anything left, I'd invest in solar.
The Santos had to hide the money.
They were feeling the heat from the Prophets and Feds.
So they hid it before they got arrested.
I guess they didn't know they'd be killed in prison.
Hmm.
- Think they left the money with family? - No.
Benito's family owned a smoke shop that I used to walk by.
And when it burned down, they couldn't afford to rebuild.
What about the other guy, Frankie? [CHUCKLES.]
He was stupid, but nice.
I made a dress for his girlfriend once, and he left me a good tip.
If If I go through my old receipts, I could probably find her name.
- Why do that? - Maybe it could lead to something.
No, don't worry about it.
If nobody's found the money by now, it's not gonna be me.
Mijo.
Come here.
Ah.
Why not you? Because it's one thing to think about finding the money, but what are the chances I actually could? Slim to none.
So? So I just don't see myself as someone who could do something this Special? If you don't try, it will haunt you the rest of your life.
Somebody has to find that money.
Why can't it be you, Hamal? - Jamal.
- Hamal every story behind a story has a beginning.
What if this one was yours? Ruby's not here, is he? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Where did Ruby go? [MUFFLED.]
I'm here.
[JASMINE SNORES.]
I'm here! My breath is fading! - Where am I? - My house.
Oh, thank God.
She threatened to drag me to Pimp Lane.
That's when I passed out.
Please tell me nothing happened.
I'm all about consent.
That's very noble.
You deserve a dance.
Might be easier to drink from the bottle.
You guys aren't going to make us dance by ourselves, are you? You heard her.
It's now or never.
- Come here.
- No.
Why? I'm not safe.
Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? I need your love I need your love I need your love I need your love Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? Will you be my one and only? I need your love
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