One Day at a Time (2017) s02e09 Episode Script
Hello, Penelope
1 I can't believe you met when my mom treated you in Afghanistan.
- What was your injury? - I got shot in the face.
Dang! A tequila shot.
But it really burned.
And it got my shirt all wet.
My hero.
Thank you, Lydia.
If you were my medic, I would've faked an injury.
Stop it, Max.
Just kidding.
Don't.
Yeah.
Even though you are the embodiment of the alpha male, which normally I find [RETCHES.]
Looking at you up close with your chiseled features and your blue-green eyes with speckles of gold I get it.
I like it here.
Okay.
Can my mother and my daughter please stop trying to seduce my boyfriend? It's kind of annoying how easy it was for you to charm them.
[GROANS.]
I'm off my game.
Took me the whole dinner.
With you, it was three minutes of small talk, then, boom.
Okay, yeah.
I was there.
Yeah.
Well, it's your turn next week.
Elaine and Bernie Ferraro are excited to meet you.
Heads up, my dad's been listening to Spanish language tapes, so I'm not sure what that's gonna be.
My mother almost open-mouth kissed you, so the bar is low.
- [CELL PHONE CHIMES.]
- Oh.
I got it.
- "Pill time"? - Yeah.
That is a reminder for somebody.
Mami! [EXCLAIMS.]
Don't forget to take your pill! She's old, so she's got to take a lot of stuff.
She's forgetful, so the reminder's on my phone.
She doesn't know how to use this thing.
Okay.
So, Mami, you'll remember to take your pill, right? In the mouth this time? SÃ.
SÃ, of course.
I take pills because I am so forgetful.
Where am I? This is not Cuba.
- Okay.
- [PENELOPE.]
That's great.
- Okay, Mami, could you - Okay.
Okay.
Thank you.
I'm so sorry.
I don't want Max to know I'm on antidepressants.
Oh, pero, of course you don't want to tell him.
It's humiliating.
- It's not humiliating.
- Oh, no? Then I will tell him.
Oh, shut your mouth! Or I'll tell him you don't have eyebrows! [GASPS.]
Okay.
You got me by the cojones and I respect it.
Hey, how about we both go off our pills? And there will be so much more room in the medicine cabinet for rouge and lipstick.
Things we really need.
- Mami, your pills are to prevent a stroke.
- A stroke is all up here.
- You need to keep taking those pills.
- Okay! I'll stay a druggie.
- But I need some help.
Max? - ¿S� I have to take a pill.
But as we both know, I am old and weak, so can you carry me to the bathroom? Okay.
[THEME SONG PLAYING.]
My panic attacks are starting to come at some weird places, y'all.
I don't get it, because when I was a gunner I made 100 decisions a second.
But yesterday, I was in the cookie aisle and I was sweating.
Too many options.
Next thing you know, I'm hyperventilating in a bag of Milanos.
Then I had to buy those.
- And I don't have no money for Milanos.
- [ALL LAUGH.]
Okay, this is why you need to keep using the coping tools we've been talking about.
Meditation, exercise, doing service Or maybe just stay out of the snack aisle, girl! [LAUGHS.]
I'm sorry, Pam.
Tools are great.
I don't even realize I'm in a bad place until I'm bingeing Keeping Up with the Kardashians and I'm weeping.
God! I feel bad for those people and I definitely should not.
Yes.
Sometimes our brains lie to us.
I knew I needed help when I heard a recording of myself played back.
I was wasted, slurring obscenities at a toaster about my abandonment issues.
I did the same thing! Except, instead of a toaster it was a cop.
Recording our thoughts is a very useful tool.
Hearing them played back gives you some perspective, as though someone else were talking.
So, like, "Hello, Penelope.
It's me, Penelope"? - That sounds stupid.
- Yeah, that sounds stupid, Pam.
Trust me.
It helps.
Wait, you haven't shared yet today, Penelope.
Which, for you, is unusual.
Well, I gotta be honest, guys, I'm feeling great.
And my toolbox is closed and under the bed.
Well, it's wonderful to hear that you're doing so well, but No, not just "well.
" Freaking fantastic! Like, school, work, the kids It's all amazing.
Plus, she's got a hot new boyfriend.
Speaking of tools gathering dust under my bed! [LAUGHS.]
Yes, girl, yes! But, no, no, no! Come on! He's more than that.
He is.
I'm actually gonna meet his parents next week.
And my family loves him.
And I'm gonna stop talking because it looks like Ramona might wanna punch me in the face.
You're not wrong.
But I'm happy for you.
- Hello! - Hi! Hello, Mami! Okay.
Are you going to put me in a home? - No, Mami, we don't do that.
- That's right! We don't! And if you ever do, papito has instructions to break me out.
Relax.
I just really need your advice on something.
Okay, mi vida.
What problem can I solve for you? Well, I'm meeting Max's parents soon and I want to make a good impression.
- So you want me to come? - No.
I need you to tell me what to wear! [LYDIA SPEAKS SPANISH.]
Okay.
This one shows off my tetas, this one shows off my nalgas, but we can find one that shows off both.
Ah, sÃ! Give the people what they want! - [WHOOPS.]
- [BOTH LAUGH.]
Maybe we can go dress shopping Tuesday night.
Perfect! Oh, no! Isn't that when you're having your cuckoo party? You mean group therapy? Yeah, well, actually, I've decided to stop going.
[GASPS.]
If I hadn't been taking my medication like you told me to, I would be having a stroke.
- [CACKLES.]
- Come on! Therapy served its purpose and I'm really glad I did it, but I'm feeling like myself again.
Now I have more time for the kids and for you and me to hang out.
Let's go shopping! I might need a new lipstick.
- What's the matter? Are you tearing up? - [CRIES.]
You really are my daughter.
There was a period of ten seconds when the doctor took you out of the room and I have always wondered.
But no more! - [CRIES.]
- [CHUCKLES.]
- [PENELOPE.]
Thanks, Sister Barbara.
- Great CPR presentation, Mom.
Yeah, Mom, the presentation was amazing.
If this whole thing wasn't about saving lives, I'd say you killed it.
It could not have gone better.
Somebody asked me if I was your sister.
[CHUCKLES.]
Somebody asked if you were a sister.
As in of Christ.
Why do you feel the need to ruin people's joy? I went too far with the Sister Barbara joke.
No! Are you kidding? Everyone thought it was hilarious.
Yeah.
Even Sister Barbara laughed.
I had never seen her teeth.
I always assumed she had fangs.
It's not cool.
It's disrespectful.
Teachers have it hard enough, and then I make a joke at her expense? Like, "Great! Make a teacher feel bad about her job.
Nice work, Penelope.
" Mom, you did great.
Don't worry.
- I don't think before I speak.
- Who does that? Yeah, Mom, it's all good.
Let's go eat.
- We'll go get our stuff.
- Okay.
Mami, why don't you take the kids without me? - Huh? - Yeah.
I'm kinda amped up, and You know what? I'm gonna go for a run.
What? Why? I've wanted to get back into exercising and now I have time.
- I'm just gonna jog home.
- Now? Yeah! It's only a mile and a half.
- Oh, hey, Pen! - Hey.
Wow, you're all sweaty.
Oh, my God! If you joined an adult kickball team after saying you were too busy to join mine, you are on a long road to forgiveness.
- [SNIFFLES, PANTING.]
I went running.
- Is someone chasing you? - Oh, my God, are they still here? - What? No.
[CELL PHONE CHIMES.]
Max, stop.
I can't talk to you right now.
You don't want to talk to Max? What's wrong with you? Do you know how hard it is to get him on the phone? I've left like 60 voicemails.
I'm just in a weird mood.
I messed up the presentation at the kids' school, verbally abused a nun.
I'm adjusting to being off my meds.
I'm having caffeine late in the day.
I'm just a little stressed out.
Definitely want to hear about the verbal nun smackdown.
But you're off your meds? - Like your antidepressants? - Yeah.
Wow Your mom said you stopped going to therapy, but this, too, huh? So your doctor thought you were ready or Didn't do it through my doctor.
It was time.
It's fine.
Sure, sure, sure.
But is that really a DIY situation? I'm a nurse.
I know what I'm doing.
Do you know you just ran a 5K in scrubs? Why am I talking to you about this anyway? Your idea of stress is when your chest waxer goes out of town.
Roberto is the only one who doesn't make it sting! I would kill to have your problems.
Too much money, too much free time, too many parents.
I know you're upset, but you don't have to take it out on me.
- Please.
- Hey.
I've been around enough to know when people are not okay, and you don't seem okay.
I get where you're coming from.
You have no idea where I'm coming from! You've had everything handed to you! You had to get hooked on drugs just to be interesting! You don't sound like yourself.
I'm gonna go.
[LYDIA CLICKS TONGUE, SIGHS.]
Lupita, wake up.
I'm up.
Bueno, it's 7:45.
Did you forget to set your alarm? I'm not gonna go to work today, 'cause I don't feel well.
[SCOFFS.]
¿Y? I once went to work with a temperature of 104.
I was delirious and no one even noticed a difference.
I can miss work for one day, Mami.
You don't feel fever-y.
I don't feel well.
I know my body.
Please, just let me sleep.
Okay, mija.
I made you some sopa with fideos.
I'm not hungry.
Okay.
Let's cure this once and for all.
This cannot be cured with Vicks VapoRub.
Everything can be cured with Vicks VapoRub! It cured your TÃa Neni's appendicitis.
Her appendix was removed.
Who's to say which treatment helped her the most? I'm gonna go back to sleep, Mami.
I'm tired.
[SPEAKS SPANISH, SIGHS.]
I'll leave this right here.
Good, you're up! I hemmed your dress so it's ready for tonight! It's sexy but not too sexy.
Max's father will love you and his mother will still respect you.
[SPEAKS SPANISH.]
What is wrong? Por favor.
I shouldn't have bought that dress.
It was stupid.
I spent too much money.
Now it's hemmed, and I can't take it back.
No, it's okay.
You deserve a nice dress.
No, I don't.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
I can't do this.
I'm not gonna go tonight.
What? Tell me what to do.
Let me help you.
You can't help me.
I don't understand what's happening.
Everything is so good! I mean, papito is perfection.
Elena is very smart.
Max is an Adonis who loves you.
And then there is me! Your life is full of blessings.
[SHAKILY.]
I know.
Mami, believe me! I know! Please, could you just leave me alone? Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
It has been a week since my last confession.
There is something wrong with my daughter.
And I don't know what happened.
She was doing so well that she stopped going to therapy, finally.
Things have never been better between my daughter and me.
And now I can't get her out of bed! - Did you try the Vicks VapoRub? - [SCOFFS.]
Of course! So your daughter is depressed? Oh, oh, yes, yes.
She's even taking medication for it.
You know, I don't understand these things.
Depression, anxiety, OCD I was just thinking about them the other night when I got up at 3:00 a.
m.
to do my makeup and clean the sponges.
Well, just because you don't feel those things, uh, doesn't mean they aren't real for her.
I wish I could take away her pain and feel it for myself.
That is what mothers are for.
Señora, taking on someone else's suffering is not possible.
But is that not what Jesus did? Okay.
Good point.
I mean, you can't know and fix everything, including your daughter.
You can only be there for her while she fixes herself.
Thank you, Padre José.
I will try.
Good.
And remember, you are not God.
Ay I know that is true, but it's still hard to hear.
Hello, Penelope.
It's me, Penelope.
[SCOFFS.]
[SIGHS.]
This is so stupid.
[KNOCKING AT DOOR.]
Oh, hi.
You here to yell at me more? Maybe insult one of my mothers? Whoa.
Whoa.
Hey! Hey.
What's going on? I did this thing where I recorded myself thinking out loud.
Can you just listen with me, please? [OVER SPEAKERS.]
Hello, Penelope.
It's me Penelope.
[SCOFFS.]
This is so stupid.
Isn't it so weird to hear your own voice out loud? You want me to listen to the whole thing and then comment? Gotcha.
[PENELOPE OVER SPEAKERS.]
I can't sleep.
It literally feels like the weight of my life is sitting on my chest.
[EXHALES.]
And then I see those kids [EXHALES.]
Those beautiful kids and I'm so tired.
Maybe too tired to be what they need.
[CRYING.]
I want so badly for them to grow up and live full, happy lives.
But I can't teach them how to do that because I don't know how to do that myself.
I'm failing them.
I'm failing them.
They deserve so much better than me.
It's like when people tell me, "Be happy.
You have a great life.
" It makes me feel like garbage because I know.
But what's wrong with me that I can't appreciate that? That I can't feel it? And what's the point of living if you can't feel anything? [SIGHS.]
You were right.
That woman is not okay.
I know what the last part sounds like, but I promise I would never do anything like that.
I know.
But I think you know that healthy brains don't go to that place.
[SIGHS.]
You need to go back on your meds.
I don't want to be on a drug for the rest of my life! I shouldn't have to need it! I shouldn't have to need these either, but I do.
To see.
And to look rugged but also smart.
- It's not the same thing.
- Oh, no? Okay.
Wanna go for a drive? There's got to be another way to feel happy.
[SIGHS.]
So it's Fourth of July, 2011.
I'd been sober for a while, so I thought I'd celebrate with a beer.
Woke up three days later in an alley.
Then the bowling ball hit me.
I was in the gutter for a long time.
It's really slippery without the shoes.
That was the day I truly accepted that I can't have alcohol or drugs, ever.
Not a beer, not a glass of wine, not even six hits of acid at a Grateful Dead show, no matter how well it makes me dance.
I kinda get where you're coming from.
There's something I want that I can't have for the rest of my life.
And there's something you don't want that you have to have for the rest of yours.
[SHAKILY.]
I'm really sorry about all the crap I said to you.
Ah! I can take it.
We're best friends.
[CHUCKLES.]
Oh, man! I think you might actually be my best friend.
Now I'm really depressed.
- Hello.
- Ay, Mami! Jesus! Mami, I thought you were a ghost.
Please, you cannot see ghosts.
You do not have the gift.
Why are you still awake? [SCOFFS.]
I was worried about you.
Plus, the kitchen sink is not going to Fabuloso itself.
Are you feeling better? Not yet, but I'm gonna be.
Oh? So, not only did I stop going to therapy, but I also went off my meds a few weeks ago.
But I'm gonna go back on them.
And I'm going back to therapy.
I know my Cuban brain should be able to fight off the crazy like a matador in a bullfight or whatever.
But, Mami, I really I don't want to hear it.
Okay.
What? You do what you need to do to fix yourself.
And I will be here for you.
Hold on.
Is this some sort of reverse psychology? [SCOFFS.]
No.
I do not believe in psychology.
For me.
Thank you, Mami.
I love you, nena, and I just want you to be happy.
Hi! Got your text.
Glad your phone works.
Could've been useful two days ago when you stood up my parents.
My dad still insisted on ordering in Spanish.
We did not get what we wanted.
I hope you'll let me explain and make it up to you physically.
You have the floor.
I need to tell you something.
After you hear it, you can decide whether or not you still wanna be with me.
What is it? You have kids and live with your mom? 'Cause those are deal-breakers.
That [SIGHS.]
And I have depression and anxiety.
And I take medication for it.
And if I don't take the medication, it's not good.
You're a veteran.
Maybe you get it, maybe you don't.
That's what happened when I stood you up.
I tried to go off and [INHALES SHARPLY.]
Anyway, the meds help me stay in control of my life.
I'll probably have to be on them forever.
Okay.
So what's the thing that would make me not wanna be with you? 'Sup, bestie? Oh Making out with other bestie.
It's so awkward when your two best friends start dating.
What do you guys wanna do tonight? Oh, I got it.
Why don't all three of us Netflix and chill? [MUSIC PLAYING.]
- What was your injury? - I got shot in the face.
Dang! A tequila shot.
But it really burned.
And it got my shirt all wet.
My hero.
Thank you, Lydia.
If you were my medic, I would've faked an injury.
Stop it, Max.
Just kidding.
Don't.
Yeah.
Even though you are the embodiment of the alpha male, which normally I find [RETCHES.]
Looking at you up close with your chiseled features and your blue-green eyes with speckles of gold I get it.
I like it here.
Okay.
Can my mother and my daughter please stop trying to seduce my boyfriend? It's kind of annoying how easy it was for you to charm them.
[GROANS.]
I'm off my game.
Took me the whole dinner.
With you, it was three minutes of small talk, then, boom.
Okay, yeah.
I was there.
Yeah.
Well, it's your turn next week.
Elaine and Bernie Ferraro are excited to meet you.
Heads up, my dad's been listening to Spanish language tapes, so I'm not sure what that's gonna be.
My mother almost open-mouth kissed you, so the bar is low.
- [CELL PHONE CHIMES.]
- Oh.
I got it.
- "Pill time"? - Yeah.
That is a reminder for somebody.
Mami! [EXCLAIMS.]
Don't forget to take your pill! She's old, so she's got to take a lot of stuff.
She's forgetful, so the reminder's on my phone.
She doesn't know how to use this thing.
Okay.
So, Mami, you'll remember to take your pill, right? In the mouth this time? SÃ.
SÃ, of course.
I take pills because I am so forgetful.
Where am I? This is not Cuba.
- Okay.
- [PENELOPE.]
That's great.
- Okay, Mami, could you - Okay.
Okay.
Thank you.
I'm so sorry.
I don't want Max to know I'm on antidepressants.
Oh, pero, of course you don't want to tell him.
It's humiliating.
- It's not humiliating.
- Oh, no? Then I will tell him.
Oh, shut your mouth! Or I'll tell him you don't have eyebrows! [GASPS.]
Okay.
You got me by the cojones and I respect it.
Hey, how about we both go off our pills? And there will be so much more room in the medicine cabinet for rouge and lipstick.
Things we really need.
- Mami, your pills are to prevent a stroke.
- A stroke is all up here.
- You need to keep taking those pills.
- Okay! I'll stay a druggie.
- But I need some help.
Max? - ¿S� I have to take a pill.
But as we both know, I am old and weak, so can you carry me to the bathroom? Okay.
[THEME SONG PLAYING.]
My panic attacks are starting to come at some weird places, y'all.
I don't get it, because when I was a gunner I made 100 decisions a second.
But yesterday, I was in the cookie aisle and I was sweating.
Too many options.
Next thing you know, I'm hyperventilating in a bag of Milanos.
Then I had to buy those.
- And I don't have no money for Milanos.
- [ALL LAUGH.]
Okay, this is why you need to keep using the coping tools we've been talking about.
Meditation, exercise, doing service Or maybe just stay out of the snack aisle, girl! [LAUGHS.]
I'm sorry, Pam.
Tools are great.
I don't even realize I'm in a bad place until I'm bingeing Keeping Up with the Kardashians and I'm weeping.
God! I feel bad for those people and I definitely should not.
Yes.
Sometimes our brains lie to us.
I knew I needed help when I heard a recording of myself played back.
I was wasted, slurring obscenities at a toaster about my abandonment issues.
I did the same thing! Except, instead of a toaster it was a cop.
Recording our thoughts is a very useful tool.
Hearing them played back gives you some perspective, as though someone else were talking.
So, like, "Hello, Penelope.
It's me, Penelope"? - That sounds stupid.
- Yeah, that sounds stupid, Pam.
Trust me.
It helps.
Wait, you haven't shared yet today, Penelope.
Which, for you, is unusual.
Well, I gotta be honest, guys, I'm feeling great.
And my toolbox is closed and under the bed.
Well, it's wonderful to hear that you're doing so well, but No, not just "well.
" Freaking fantastic! Like, school, work, the kids It's all amazing.
Plus, she's got a hot new boyfriend.
Speaking of tools gathering dust under my bed! [LAUGHS.]
Yes, girl, yes! But, no, no, no! Come on! He's more than that.
He is.
I'm actually gonna meet his parents next week.
And my family loves him.
And I'm gonna stop talking because it looks like Ramona might wanna punch me in the face.
You're not wrong.
But I'm happy for you.
- Hello! - Hi! Hello, Mami! Okay.
Are you going to put me in a home? - No, Mami, we don't do that.
- That's right! We don't! And if you ever do, papito has instructions to break me out.
Relax.
I just really need your advice on something.
Okay, mi vida.
What problem can I solve for you? Well, I'm meeting Max's parents soon and I want to make a good impression.
- So you want me to come? - No.
I need you to tell me what to wear! [LYDIA SPEAKS SPANISH.]
Okay.
This one shows off my tetas, this one shows off my nalgas, but we can find one that shows off both.
Ah, sÃ! Give the people what they want! - [WHOOPS.]
- [BOTH LAUGH.]
Maybe we can go dress shopping Tuesday night.
Perfect! Oh, no! Isn't that when you're having your cuckoo party? You mean group therapy? Yeah, well, actually, I've decided to stop going.
[GASPS.]
If I hadn't been taking my medication like you told me to, I would be having a stroke.
- [CACKLES.]
- Come on! Therapy served its purpose and I'm really glad I did it, but I'm feeling like myself again.
Now I have more time for the kids and for you and me to hang out.
Let's go shopping! I might need a new lipstick.
- What's the matter? Are you tearing up? - [CRIES.]
You really are my daughter.
There was a period of ten seconds when the doctor took you out of the room and I have always wondered.
But no more! - [CRIES.]
- [CHUCKLES.]
- [PENELOPE.]
Thanks, Sister Barbara.
- Great CPR presentation, Mom.
Yeah, Mom, the presentation was amazing.
If this whole thing wasn't about saving lives, I'd say you killed it.
It could not have gone better.
Somebody asked me if I was your sister.
[CHUCKLES.]
Somebody asked if you were a sister.
As in of Christ.
Why do you feel the need to ruin people's joy? I went too far with the Sister Barbara joke.
No! Are you kidding? Everyone thought it was hilarious.
Yeah.
Even Sister Barbara laughed.
I had never seen her teeth.
I always assumed she had fangs.
It's not cool.
It's disrespectful.
Teachers have it hard enough, and then I make a joke at her expense? Like, "Great! Make a teacher feel bad about her job.
Nice work, Penelope.
" Mom, you did great.
Don't worry.
- I don't think before I speak.
- Who does that? Yeah, Mom, it's all good.
Let's go eat.
- We'll go get our stuff.
- Okay.
Mami, why don't you take the kids without me? - Huh? - Yeah.
I'm kinda amped up, and You know what? I'm gonna go for a run.
What? Why? I've wanted to get back into exercising and now I have time.
- I'm just gonna jog home.
- Now? Yeah! It's only a mile and a half.
- Oh, hey, Pen! - Hey.
Wow, you're all sweaty.
Oh, my God! If you joined an adult kickball team after saying you were too busy to join mine, you are on a long road to forgiveness.
- [SNIFFLES, PANTING.]
I went running.
- Is someone chasing you? - Oh, my God, are they still here? - What? No.
[CELL PHONE CHIMES.]
Max, stop.
I can't talk to you right now.
You don't want to talk to Max? What's wrong with you? Do you know how hard it is to get him on the phone? I've left like 60 voicemails.
I'm just in a weird mood.
I messed up the presentation at the kids' school, verbally abused a nun.
I'm adjusting to being off my meds.
I'm having caffeine late in the day.
I'm just a little stressed out.
Definitely want to hear about the verbal nun smackdown.
But you're off your meds? - Like your antidepressants? - Yeah.
Wow Your mom said you stopped going to therapy, but this, too, huh? So your doctor thought you were ready or Didn't do it through my doctor.
It was time.
It's fine.
Sure, sure, sure.
But is that really a DIY situation? I'm a nurse.
I know what I'm doing.
Do you know you just ran a 5K in scrubs? Why am I talking to you about this anyway? Your idea of stress is when your chest waxer goes out of town.
Roberto is the only one who doesn't make it sting! I would kill to have your problems.
Too much money, too much free time, too many parents.
I know you're upset, but you don't have to take it out on me.
- Please.
- Hey.
I've been around enough to know when people are not okay, and you don't seem okay.
I get where you're coming from.
You have no idea where I'm coming from! You've had everything handed to you! You had to get hooked on drugs just to be interesting! You don't sound like yourself.
I'm gonna go.
[LYDIA CLICKS TONGUE, SIGHS.]
Lupita, wake up.
I'm up.
Bueno, it's 7:45.
Did you forget to set your alarm? I'm not gonna go to work today, 'cause I don't feel well.
[SCOFFS.]
¿Y? I once went to work with a temperature of 104.
I was delirious and no one even noticed a difference.
I can miss work for one day, Mami.
You don't feel fever-y.
I don't feel well.
I know my body.
Please, just let me sleep.
Okay, mija.
I made you some sopa with fideos.
I'm not hungry.
Okay.
Let's cure this once and for all.
This cannot be cured with Vicks VapoRub.
Everything can be cured with Vicks VapoRub! It cured your TÃa Neni's appendicitis.
Her appendix was removed.
Who's to say which treatment helped her the most? I'm gonna go back to sleep, Mami.
I'm tired.
[SPEAKS SPANISH, SIGHS.]
I'll leave this right here.
Good, you're up! I hemmed your dress so it's ready for tonight! It's sexy but not too sexy.
Max's father will love you and his mother will still respect you.
[SPEAKS SPANISH.]
What is wrong? Por favor.
I shouldn't have bought that dress.
It was stupid.
I spent too much money.
Now it's hemmed, and I can't take it back.
No, it's okay.
You deserve a nice dress.
No, I don't.
[EXHALES DEEPLY.]
I can't do this.
I'm not gonna go tonight.
What? Tell me what to do.
Let me help you.
You can't help me.
I don't understand what's happening.
Everything is so good! I mean, papito is perfection.
Elena is very smart.
Max is an Adonis who loves you.
And then there is me! Your life is full of blessings.
[SHAKILY.]
I know.
Mami, believe me! I know! Please, could you just leave me alone? Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
It has been a week since my last confession.
There is something wrong with my daughter.
And I don't know what happened.
She was doing so well that she stopped going to therapy, finally.
Things have never been better between my daughter and me.
And now I can't get her out of bed! - Did you try the Vicks VapoRub? - [SCOFFS.]
Of course! So your daughter is depressed? Oh, oh, yes, yes.
She's even taking medication for it.
You know, I don't understand these things.
Depression, anxiety, OCD I was just thinking about them the other night when I got up at 3:00 a.
m.
to do my makeup and clean the sponges.
Well, just because you don't feel those things, uh, doesn't mean they aren't real for her.
I wish I could take away her pain and feel it for myself.
That is what mothers are for.
Señora, taking on someone else's suffering is not possible.
But is that not what Jesus did? Okay.
Good point.
I mean, you can't know and fix everything, including your daughter.
You can only be there for her while she fixes herself.
Thank you, Padre José.
I will try.
Good.
And remember, you are not God.
Ay I know that is true, but it's still hard to hear.
Hello, Penelope.
It's me, Penelope.
[SCOFFS.]
[SIGHS.]
This is so stupid.
[KNOCKING AT DOOR.]
Oh, hi.
You here to yell at me more? Maybe insult one of my mothers? Whoa.
Whoa.
Hey! Hey.
What's going on? I did this thing where I recorded myself thinking out loud.
Can you just listen with me, please? [OVER SPEAKERS.]
Hello, Penelope.
It's me Penelope.
[SCOFFS.]
This is so stupid.
Isn't it so weird to hear your own voice out loud? You want me to listen to the whole thing and then comment? Gotcha.
[PENELOPE OVER SPEAKERS.]
I can't sleep.
It literally feels like the weight of my life is sitting on my chest.
[EXHALES.]
And then I see those kids [EXHALES.]
Those beautiful kids and I'm so tired.
Maybe too tired to be what they need.
[CRYING.]
I want so badly for them to grow up and live full, happy lives.
But I can't teach them how to do that because I don't know how to do that myself.
I'm failing them.
I'm failing them.
They deserve so much better than me.
It's like when people tell me, "Be happy.
You have a great life.
" It makes me feel like garbage because I know.
But what's wrong with me that I can't appreciate that? That I can't feel it? And what's the point of living if you can't feel anything? [SIGHS.]
You were right.
That woman is not okay.
I know what the last part sounds like, but I promise I would never do anything like that.
I know.
But I think you know that healthy brains don't go to that place.
[SIGHS.]
You need to go back on your meds.
I don't want to be on a drug for the rest of my life! I shouldn't have to need it! I shouldn't have to need these either, but I do.
To see.
And to look rugged but also smart.
- It's not the same thing.
- Oh, no? Okay.
Wanna go for a drive? There's got to be another way to feel happy.
[SIGHS.]
So it's Fourth of July, 2011.
I'd been sober for a while, so I thought I'd celebrate with a beer.
Woke up three days later in an alley.
Then the bowling ball hit me.
I was in the gutter for a long time.
It's really slippery without the shoes.
That was the day I truly accepted that I can't have alcohol or drugs, ever.
Not a beer, not a glass of wine, not even six hits of acid at a Grateful Dead show, no matter how well it makes me dance.
I kinda get where you're coming from.
There's something I want that I can't have for the rest of my life.
And there's something you don't want that you have to have for the rest of yours.
[SHAKILY.]
I'm really sorry about all the crap I said to you.
Ah! I can take it.
We're best friends.
[CHUCKLES.]
Oh, man! I think you might actually be my best friend.
Now I'm really depressed.
- Hello.
- Ay, Mami! Jesus! Mami, I thought you were a ghost.
Please, you cannot see ghosts.
You do not have the gift.
Why are you still awake? [SCOFFS.]
I was worried about you.
Plus, the kitchen sink is not going to Fabuloso itself.
Are you feeling better? Not yet, but I'm gonna be.
Oh? So, not only did I stop going to therapy, but I also went off my meds a few weeks ago.
But I'm gonna go back on them.
And I'm going back to therapy.
I know my Cuban brain should be able to fight off the crazy like a matador in a bullfight or whatever.
But, Mami, I really I don't want to hear it.
Okay.
What? You do what you need to do to fix yourself.
And I will be here for you.
Hold on.
Is this some sort of reverse psychology? [SCOFFS.]
No.
I do not believe in psychology.
For me.
Thank you, Mami.
I love you, nena, and I just want you to be happy.
Hi! Got your text.
Glad your phone works.
Could've been useful two days ago when you stood up my parents.
My dad still insisted on ordering in Spanish.
We did not get what we wanted.
I hope you'll let me explain and make it up to you physically.
You have the floor.
I need to tell you something.
After you hear it, you can decide whether or not you still wanna be with me.
What is it? You have kids and live with your mom? 'Cause those are deal-breakers.
That [SIGHS.]
And I have depression and anxiety.
And I take medication for it.
And if I don't take the medication, it's not good.
You're a veteran.
Maybe you get it, maybe you don't.
That's what happened when I stood you up.
I tried to go off and [INHALES SHARPLY.]
Anyway, the meds help me stay in control of my life.
I'll probably have to be on them forever.
Okay.
So what's the thing that would make me not wanna be with you? 'Sup, bestie? Oh Making out with other bestie.
It's so awkward when your two best friends start dating.
What do you guys wanna do tonight? Oh, I got it.
Why don't all three of us Netflix and chill? [MUSIC PLAYING.]