One Tree Hill s03e05 Episode Script

A Multitude of Casualties

Previously on One Tree Hill.
Well, well, well.
Mayor Mullins.
You drop your bid for re-election.
You're gonna endorse me for mayor.
Look, I don't want to be curious about you, but I can't help it.
I am.
Well, selfishly, I'm glad that's one battle you're losing.
I'm just scared.
Haley's really hurting, Nathan.
She hasn't written a song since you guys split up.
So what can Chris Keller do for you? He can help Haley with her music.
You want to dance? - Unless you're seeing someone.
- No.
Not exclusively.
Is everybody ready for Midnight Madness? That's what I'm talking about! The countdown to the start of the season is on! Let me hear you! Five! Four! Three! Two! One! Let the madness begin! So are you gonna tell me what's going on with Haley? You're breaking her heart, and you know that.
Lucas, this is a pep rally.
Where's your pep? She's your wife! You treat her like this, manipulating her, pushing her back to Chris! All right, you need to back up.
Now.
Really? Is that an order, Captain? - Don't push me, bitch.
- Why? You gonna do something about it? You're a coward.
You love Haley, but instead of dealing with it, you avoid her, treat her like dirt.
God, I used to wonder why you did it, and then I realized something.
You're just like Dan.
Now, the team that's gonna deliver us our state title, your Tree Hill Ravens! Damn your sperm, Danny.
Lucas Scott throws a roundhouse to Nathan Scott's jaw.
It's just past 12:00 and all hell's broken loose! Now this is truly Midnight Madness! Announcer tryouts for the season.
First official practice, midnight, Friday.
Whatever.
Hey, I was hoping I'd catch you.
- Why is that? - I don't know, I think we should talk.
About what? About what happened the other night at the masquerade ball.
I can't, Whitey wants to see me before class.
- But it wasn't that big of a deal, anyway.
- It was to me.
It was a nice moment, Haley, but it's over now.
I gotta go.
You know what hit me today? These are our last cheerleader tryouts ever.
Yeah, I'm really broken up about it.
Come on, how can you not love tryout day? Just the smell of it.
Like sports bras and desperation.
Speaking of desperate, how's life in the non-exclusive dating world? - Lucas isn't playing fair.
- Maybe he's not playing at all.
Exactly.
I mean, unless you count him dancing with that slut at the masquerade ball, he's been totally monogamous.
He knows the rules.
Why can't he just follow them? Brooke, when are you gonna quit this crap and accept the fact that a really great guy wants to be with you? Nothing good can come of this, okay? What are you gonna do? Force Lucas to go out and see other people? - P.
Sawyer, you are a genius.
- Okay, that is not what I meant.
Is this where we go for cheer tryouts? What tipped you off? Go Ravens! We have spirit! Yeah, go team! Let's go Ravens.
What, what, what, what.
A what-what-what.
Do it, do it, let's go.
T.
H.
S.
Is number one, yell "go"! T.
H.
S.
Is number one.
Big blue! Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, I'm fine.
Seriously, I'm fine, but does this mean I didn't get it? What part of this were we gonna miss again? One spot on the team and there's no one to fill it? It was like dance auditions for Crap, The Musical.
Sorry, am I too late? I got lost.
This new campus is totally confusing.
I'm Rachel, by the way.
Really? I thought it was Pamela.
Oh, right.
The party.
That guy wasn't your boyfriend, was he? Okay, you were late, now you're just wasting my time.
Just hit your mark and I'll start the song.
I actually brought my own song.
Whenever you're ready.
I'd like to thank you on behalf of myself and the group, and I hope we pass the audition.
- I'm sorry, what? - John Lennon.
The Let It Be album.
Girl knows her music.
Too bad she was late.
Sorry, Betty, was it? We'll be in touch.
It's Rachel, and I hope so.
So, I guess we found our girl, right? Oh, you just like her 'cause of that stupid Bee Gees thing.
No, I like her because she's good.
- You wanted to see me, Coach? - Nathan, good timing.
Look at this, triangle offense.
It all runs through to you.
- I'm ready, Coach.
- I know you are.
You know, it might not come as a surprise, but I'm making it official.
I'm making you captain of this year's squad.
- I don't know what to say.
- There's nothing to say.
You've earned it.
Well, in that case, I promise to do whatever I can to get you that championship.
Nathan, I appreciate that, but if we get that far, that trophy belongs to the team, it's not mine.
Team unity.
That's the captain's responsibility.
So I've been thinking about our whole "non-exclusive" thing and about how you haven't been holding up your end of the bargain.
I didn't know it was a requirement.
Lucas, in order for this to work, there has to be a balance.
I kiss a guy, you kiss a girl.
I kiss two guys - I kiss you twice.
- You kiss someone else.
Which is why I'm gonna pick a girl for you.
Say, somebody like her.
Okay.
Go ask her out.
Go on.
- Really? You want me to ask her out? - Yeah.
- You're sure? - I'm sure.
She's the one.
Okay, if you insist.
- Want that autographed? - God.
I knew you'd be happy to see me.
So, how's married life? What are you doing here, Chris? Truthfully, I was thinking, you and me should work together again.
- Are you kidding me? - Come on, you know Chris Keller Sorry.
Haley, you and I made great music together.
- Remember? - Yeah! I remember exactly what happened.
Do you? Yeah, so things weren't always easy, but if you just set that other crap aside That other crap was my marriage, Chris.
Details, Haley.
Come on.
Me and you.
Just music.
What do you say? - She said no? - Among other things.
The girl has a real potty mouth when she wants to.
So you just gave up? I mean, you didn't so easily last time.
Whoa, whoa, that's unfair.
And entirely correct.
Listen, you know I don't like to get in the middle of other people's relationships.
But Haley wants you, man.
I don't get it.
Why is it so important to you that she and I work together? I have my reasons.
And you wanna share them with me? Haley's music was a big part of her life.
Without it, she's just not Haley.
So what, she gets her music back, you get her back? No, it's not about that.
This is about Haley.
Well, it doesn't matter anyway.
She's not gonna go for it.
- We'll see about that.
- Whatever you say.
So, we'd make a pretty good team, you and me.
- Team? You and me? - What? You don't think I got game? Come on.
Come on.
How do you know I wasn't aiming there? See you, partner.
He's running for mayor? That conniving skunk.
Do you realize the amount of control the mayor has? The police department, the zoning commission, not to mention veto power over city council.
I was going to tell you, Karen.
To be honest, when Dan first brought it up, I thought he was joking.
I mean, he's running unopposed.
Well, then we're gonna have to find somebody who can beat him.
You know, I'd love to help, but my hands are tied.
I made a deal with the devil that I'd stand by his side through this election.
- In exchange for what? - A divorce.
Freedom for Nathan, for me.
Trust me, it was an offer too good to refuse.
Sure.
You know, I can still make things difficult for him.
The billboards look great.
TV ads air next week.
And thanks to a well-timed donation, the high school's generously agreed to officially retire my jersey this Friday night at Midnight Madness.
Which brings me to my platform, "Family First.
" A return to traditional values.
Safer streets, better schools.
Neighborhood watch programs.
A new and improved mass transit system.
Parents as role models I'm so sorry, Dan.
I didn't know we had company.
Can you see my ass through this? Deb, honey, it's a little early to be drinking, don't you think? Oh, come on, it's noon somewhere, right? Cheers.
Okay, we're done.
Do you see how the tendrils frame her face? Oh, my God, I look so hot.
Thanks, Rach.
- God, you rock.
- No, Bev, you rock.
- Hey, boyfriend.
- Hey.
- Are we still on for tonight? - Yeah, about that.
Here's the thing, when I asked you out, it was just to make Brooke jealous.
I see.
So, basically, you just took advantage of the new girl.
- Dude, that's just wrong.
- I'm sorry.
Lucky for you, I'm into wrong.
My address.
Pick me up at 8:00.
Yummy.
Tomorrow's Midnight Madness, so practice doesn't officially start till then.
That doesn't mean we can't get a head start.
Aye aye, Captain! So, today, we're gonna run full court, for thirty.
- Captain Scott? - It's just Nathan, Tim.
Captain Nathan, has it occurred to you to appoint a vice captain in the event that you're assassinated or smash up another race car? No.
All right, I've already split up the teams, you guys know who you are.
Everybody else just rotate in, all right? Yeah, about that, I notice you've got both centers.
How about we take Aero? That's a great idea, Lucas.
Maybe when you're captain, we can try that.
In fact, why don't you just go ahead and sit this one out, all right? - You're kidding.
- No.
I'm captain, and if you can't handle that, you can leave.
Fede, you're in.
Let's go.
Did I miss the tryouts? Everyone missed the tryouts.
- Why, are you interested? - Uh-huh.
- Okay, what's your name? - Gigi.
Okay, Gigi, do you have any prior experience announcing basketball? I see, so you're just a big fan of the game.
Gigi, you do realize this is a job where you talk? About basketball.
I'll be in touch.
There you go.
Thank you.
You too, huh? Don't freak, I'm pretty sure taste in coffee drinks isn't hereditary.
I was hoping I'd run into you.
I mean, considering you've been lurking outside my motel room.
Yeah, I'm really sorry about that.
It's okay.
I would've come out and offered you a soda.
The last thing I wanna do is complicate your life.
Well, I probably better go.
You know, there's this lunchtime concert.
This guy doing ska covers of Neil Diamond songs.
- That sounds awful.
- Yeah, I thought so, too.
- So you wanna check it out? - Yeah.
Okay, so wait.
You're saying that you were actually conceived at Woodstock.
Well, that's what my parents say, but their math's a little off.
They were pretty big hippies, though.
Got a picture of them somewhere.
Bear in mind, this was taken a while ago, but Oh, God.
- What the hell is this? - It's an article I wrote.
For what, Lying Bitch Monthly? - Peyton.
- You said you wanted to get to know me! - You said that there wasn't any article! - There wasn't, at the time.
You also said that you don't draw, but really, Ellie, this looks a hell of a lot like me! If you would just listen, I can explain.
You know what? Don't bother.
In fact, I've got a headline for your article, it's called, "Go to Hell.
" I just had a great idea! Does it involve trigonometry? I don't know what that is, so I doubt it.
You are gonna be a cheerleader.
- What? - I know, it's sudden, right? But I was thinking, you did such a great job filling in at last year's tournament that why not do the same thing this year, only permanently.
- Thanks, but I'll pass.
- Come on.
You're my roommate.
You're supposed to have my back.
That Rachel girl, she is stealing my life.
She's dating Lucas, which, okay, I accidentally orchestrated.
But my entire squad has a girl crush on her.
Basically, if you do not cheer, I'm screwed.
Brooke, I have a lot going on in my life right now.
Nathan's being all hot and cold and now with Chris back in town - Oh, my God.
- What? Oh, that's totally it.
That's exactly why Nathan's acting so weird.
He knows Chris is back in town and he thinks I had something to do with it.
Oh, yeah, great.
We've solved your riddle.
Can we please get back to mine? Give me an "H"! I can't! You can, and besides, I thought your goal was to be with Nathan.
You'd be with him all the time, pep rallies, and away games I know, I get it.
I just I think that if I join the cheerleading squad, Nathan would see it as some, like, pathetic attempt to get close to him.
That's funny.
It seems to me like worrying about what Nathan thinks is pathetic, is actually pretty pathetic.
Forget about Nathan.
Why don't you do what you want for once? Okay, I will.
No thanks.
Let me rephrase that.
Why don't you just do what I want for once? Come on.
Fine.
Oh, did I mention that Nathan's very often shirtless at practice? You know, taut and sweaty and bulging in all the right places.
All the girls notice.
Okay, see you.
You don't give up, do you? Peyton, I had to explain.
I couldn't leave things like that.
Maybe if you'd just read the article.
Fine.
Come in, I've got something for you.
I'm a writer, Peyton.
It's a big part of my life, but I never meant to hurt you and the fact that you even think that You wanna know what I think? I think you're just a lying junkie who probably doesn't even have cancer.
Oh, I see.
So this relationship that we have, if you can call it that, you can use it for your podcasts and your drawings, but I can't write about it.
Just get out, Ellie.
Out of my house, out of my town and out of my life.
Okay.
I will.
But know this, Peyton.
Your trust was always more important to me than any article.
You may not believe that, but it's the truth.
Damn it, Dan! What are you doing? Oh, in the spirit of your little fashion show earlier, I decided to take up photography.
I call this exhibit, "Deb's Toothbrush.
" Let's see, here's me Armor Alling the tires, with your toothbrush.
Scrubbing the toilet.
The neighbor's dog.
Oh, and my favorite, here's your toothbrush up the dog's So, basically, the plan is to parade me around in front of Brooke, rubbing her nose in the fact that you're out with an extremely hot girl who isn't her? - Yeah, pretty much.
- Cool.
Just show me where she works.
Oh, perfect timing.
You think it's working? Oh, yeah, but we can do better.
Whoa, I think this is a bad idea.
Welcome to Suburban Filth, can I help you? Yes, we're looking for some lingerie, something lacy, open cup, possibly edible.
Okay, joke's over, Rachel, let's go.
You know, I think you're in the wrong store, you're looking for Slut Barn, downstairs.
These will do.
Oh, and I need a pair for my sister.
She's kind of chubby, you know, your size.
Either you take her out that door or I'm gonna put her through the window.
Okay, look, I'm sorry.
I messed up.
- But you're the one who told me to see - Now, Lucas! - Let's go, Rachel.
- Yeah, okay.
Service here sucks donkeys, anyway.
Hey! I'm I wasn't expecting you.
Come on in.
I can't stay.
I just There's something I wanna talk to you about.
- Chris.
- How'd you know? Please, all this weirdness between us, I just figured.
Nathan, I didn't know he was coming back into town.
You have to believe me.
I would never work with him again.
- Actually, I think you should.
- You what? He's good for your music, Haley, and that's what you should be focusing on right now.
Nathan, working with Chris nearly killed our marriage.
- Do you remember how jealous you were? - Yeah, and that's just it.
I told you I needed to be able to trust you again.
- This is your chance.
- So this is like a test? You can call it what you want, but if you work with Chris and you end up having feelings for him again, I guess I'll have my answer.
That's ridiculous! Nathan, that's not fair! Maybe not.
But like I said, it's your chance.
Vote Dan Scott for mayor.
Appreciate your vote.
Vote for Dan Scott.
Dan Scott for mayor.
Hey, Nathan.
- Big night, huh? - Yeah.
I see you've managed to make it about yourself.
Come on, son.
Don't be jealous.
It's unbecoming to a captain.
And frankly, it makes you look like a tool.
Nathan.
- You okay? - Yeah.
My dad just ruins my life.
Pretty soon he'll be mayor and he can ruin everybody else's too.
Here you go, Dan Scott for mayor.
We go on in 10 minutes.
Where is everybody? Brooke, chill.
They're gonna be here.
Where the hell have you been? - You almost missed the routine.
- Sorry, Brooke.
I treated the team to a little preshow beverage.
- Brought you one.
- No, thanks.
- Brooke, relax.
It's okay.
- No, it is not okay.
First of all, this is my squad! Second Bevin, where are your cheer bloomers? I'm trying something new.
Okay, this squad is out of control and it is your fault.
- What are you gonna do, fire me? - Hi.
Nice outfit.
Well then, that's it.
Get out.
- You can't be serious.
- Oh, it's real.
Check your pompoms at the door.
Well, I don't know what to say.
- But, if that's what everyone wants - No.
Brooke, Rachel's the best cheerleader we've got.
If we want a shot at state, we need her.
Look, I make the rules and I say Haley's in! And, besides, the routine won't even work with an extra person.
- Sure it will.
Won't it, girls? - Yeah.
I'll be up front and Haley, is it? Just watch me for the changes.
Come on, girls.
Let's go stretch.
What? Okay, what the hell just happened? Good evening ladies and gentlemen.
Mouth McFadden, coming to you from the Tree Hill gym where in minutes, perhaps the most promising team in Ravens history will take the floor.
With me tonight is my new color announcer, Gigi Silveri.
Gigi, how would you describe the excitement here? Okay, then.
And Coach Whitey Durham is stepping to center court.
Welcome to Midnight Madness! All right! I want to bring out the cheerleaders in a minute.
But first, we've got some business we've got to tend to.
Twenty years ago, we had a player, one of the most talented I've ever coached.
Dan Scott scored a lot of points for this team, got a lot of rebounds.
After that, he sold a lot of automobiles, and I'm sure, in the upcoming election, he's gonna get a lot of votes, just not mine.
Dan, come up here.
Now, I thought that some years ago, we'd retired this jersey, but what the hell.
Unveil the damn thing.
Whitey Durham, everybody.
Class act.
It's an honor to be here tonight.
Looking around this gym sure brings back a lot of memories.
I played my heart out for those teams.
And I plan to put forth that same effort as your mayor.
Lord, Lord, where's Lee Harvey Oswald when we need him? And since I'm running unopposed, a vote for Dan Scott is not only the smart choice, it's the only choice.
Thank you.
Thank you, Danny.
That was a fine speech.
However, you made one small error.
I've just been told you'll be running opposed after all.
Ladies and gentlemen, the candidate that I'm endorsing, Ms.
Karen Roe.
Is everybody ready for Midnight Madness? That's what I'm talking about! The countdown to the start of the season is on! Let me hear you! Five! Four! Three! Two! One! Let the madness begin! Brooke Davis and the squad already in mid-season form.
And the newest cheerleaders, Haley James-Scott and Rachel Gattina.
Showtime.
Don't push me, bitch! - Don't push me, bitch.
- Why, you gonna do something about it? I'm just getting started.
Cool it! This isn't the pole dancing you do on weekends! Well, the new girl sure has a lot of spirit.
What is your problem! Say, you're the one with the problem! You dance like a cripple.
Nice splits though, you must have a lot of practice spreading your legs.
I also have a lot of practice making a fist.
Do you wanna see? Brooke, you don't scare me.
I mean, it's not like I'm a cookie or a donut.
Now, the team that's gonna deliver us our state title.
You're just like Dan.
Your Tree Hill Ravens! - What happened? - Who knows? Maybe somebody was being a full on diva skank.
You'd know.
You just bought yourself a nose job.
Let her go! Lucas Scott throws a roundhouse to Nathan Scott's jaw.
And over on the other side, Brooke Davis is choking the new girl! There's a hair pull, oh, an eye gouge.
Oh, and there's a painful shot to the groin! Now this is truly Midnight Madness! Gigi, I don't suppose you have anything to add.
Actually, this kind of turns me on! Never, in my 47 years of coaching, have I been so embarrassed by my players! What in the hell did I tell you about team unity? I'm sorry, Coach.
I ought to come over there and rip that captain's patch off that jersey! But I'm not gonna do it.
I don't get it.
I'm making you co-captains! God knows neither one of you deserve it, but this is our last season, and you two are either gonna make this work or tear it down! Either way, you're gonna do it together! So, what's the "C" stand for? 'Cause if it's chastity, I'm definitely in the wrong car.
It's a crazy night, huh? I thought you might be up for a little more fun.
Rachel, I told you before.
I get it, Lucas.
You're using me and I'm okay with that.
As long as you let me use you back a little.
Please, naked in the backseat is so last year, it's like, two years ago.
Brooke! This isn't what it looks like.
- Anyway, I don't get why you're so upset.
- You're kidding, right? You're the one who wanted to be non-exclusive.
- I'm just doing what you wanted.
- What I wanted? I wanted you to fight for me! I wanted you to say there is no one else that you could ever be with and that you'd rather be alone than without me.
I wanted the Lucas Scott from the beach that night, telling the world that he's the one for me.
How was I supposed to know that? You just are.
And one more thing.
Don't ever hit me again.
"It's tough to get to know Peyton.
"Like me, she tends to keep the world at arm 's length, "but in those fleeting moments she has let me in, "I've seen in her such indomitable courage and heart, "a young woman anyone would be proud to call her daughter.
" "Dan's the Man"? So you're running against me.
Who would have thought, What's your point, Dan? The point is, you came in second place then.
What makes you think it'd be any different now? Hi, guys.
As you know, I recently met my birth mother, and I really didn't like her.
As a matter of fact, I drove her away, and now she's gone.
But the part that really sucks You know that thing about judging a book by its cover? It's true.
Sometimes you gotta read the whole thing and, even then, you still might not know the whole story.
Get your guitar, and wipe that stupid smile off your face.
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