One Tree Hill s05e07 Episode Script

In Da Club

Previously on "One Tree Hill" You're dismissing me from my own band? Yes.
Only it's not your band anymore.
- I just kicked you out.
- Mia, let's go.
- I think I'm gonna stay.
- You're an idiot.
I'm gonna head home.
I'm not feeling very well.
Well, maybe you're not on-air material after all.
- Don't get mad at Lindsey.
- I'm not mad at her.
- You sound mad at her.
- Maybe I just don't like her.
You don't have to-- I'm gonna go, Haley.
I want to pay rent.
I don't know how I'm gonna do it, but I'll figure it out.
I just -- whatever this is, I don't feel right about it.
Carrie could you not wear a bikini in the pool? All right, guys, bring it in.
It has been way too long since we all hung out together, and this is the first time we're all drinking together-- legally, that is.
So, here's to hanging with our crew-- the old and the new-- and to everyone getting what they want.
I guess one shot won't kill us, huh? Maybe it will.
Brooke, what was that? I wanted something that would remind everyone of me, so they mixed their most popular liquor with their sweetest.
The bartender did name it a "Brooke Davis.
" - Isn't that right? - Actually, I think you named it that.
I call it tequila and grenadine.
It's disgusting.
You know, not many people can handle a Brooke Davis.
It's definitely one of a kind.
I don't know about the old crew, but the new crew is ready to go home.
I thought you wanted to see the Honorary Title.
I thought I could handle being around Peyton-- who hates me, by the way-- but I was wrong.
Look, Tric's a big place, okay? Avoiding her shouldn't be too difficult.
Oh, I'll have no problem avoiding her.
It's you I'm worried about.
Thank you.
Water? I wasn't even planning on drinking until Brooke forced her self on us.
It's my turn to be responsible for a change.
You know, you've really come a long way in the last month, and I'm glad to have you back.
So is Jamie.
Oh, really? How come I wasn't invited to hang out with him and the guys, then? Skills has been really strict about this "no parent" rule.
And besides, Jamie's sleepover means you and I have the house to ourselves for a little private afterparty.
My own personal champagne room? Yeah.
Except you're the stripper.
- Jack and coke, bro.
- You got it.
Coach and teach.
What y'all two doin' here, man? We should be asking you the same thing.
Me? Nah.
I'm just taking a study break from "Les Mis.
" Well, don't stay out too late.
We got an early-morning practice.
Oh, all work and no player? Come on, man.
Ain't I been on time for every practice? Yeah.
You have been good.
What can I say, man? I'm learning from the best.
You could learn a lot more from Nathan than just basketball.
Thanks for the invite.
I'm usually at home online on saturday nights.
Okay, we're gonna have to work on your rock-star image.
This should help.
I can't tell you how much I love the Honorary Title.
Oh, good.
How would you like to open for them? - When? Tonight? - Yeah.
It's one song-- one song to open up.
And I didn't even have to unbutton a button.
Why didn't you give me any notice? I'm not ready.
I look awful.
- I don't even have a band, Peyton.
- This is why I didn't tell you-- I was scared you were gonna run off and disappear again.
But you look great.
And you can warm up in my office, and the house band will back you.
I hate you.
Hey! Where have you been? Closing the store, when Victoria came in and made me take inventory.
Don't get upset, but I may have let it slip that I was meeting you here.
We have more important things to worry about, like your big date.
I think you look great, but we need an impartial opinion.
Hey, Owen! Yeah, yeah.
Hi, hi.
How does she look? Hot, right? She's wearing a Clothes Over Bro's original.
You're the prettiest girl in the room.
Did you hear that, Milly? You're the second-prettiest girl in the room.
I can't wait to see the look on Mouth's face when he finds out he's on a date with you.
He doesn't know it's a date? Relax.
Owen doesn't know we're on a date, either, but that's not stopping me.
Hey, Owen.
Thanks.
- Hey, you.
- Hey.
You look nice.
Ah, thanks.
I keep thinking it's gonna fall off.
Where's Haley? I think she's in the ladies' room.
- Hey.
Two shots.
- How's tequila? Good.
I'm not drinking tonight.
Do you need to use the ladies' room, too? I'm trying to be good.
I'm not.
- What's this? - Rent.
Sorry it's late.
- You don't have to do that.
- No, I really do.
Well, I'm not taking it.
Fine.
I'll mail it.
What was that about? She had a rent check for me.
- I didn't take it.
- Why not? I don't feel right accepting money from Peyton, all right? We've been friends for too long.
I hate to break it to you, but most guys aren't friends with their exes.
Peyton's different.
Look, I know I said we could try avoiding her, but maybe we should work this thing out.
At least say something to her.
Fine.
Let's go.
You know when you said you don't like me? Well, I don't like you either.
There.
I said something.
- You gonna order a Brooke Davis? - If only it were that easy.
I brought you a present.
It's over there, wrapped in green, and you should ask very nicely before you try and unwrap it.
- Brooke, I-I don't know.
- What? Are you seeing someone? - No, I-- well, I-- - Darling, that was rhetorical.
Come on.
Mouth, Milly.
Milly, Mouth.
Fall in love, get married, invite me to the wedding, and sit me next to a really hot guy.
We met at the Clothes Over Bro's opening.
You're Brooke's assistant.
- Yeah-- Millicent.
- Well, that's a great job.
I was pretty much her assistant in high school, so Hey! You lightened your hair.
It looks awesome.
Thanks.
You and Nathan look great, too.
It must be nice to have him up and walking.
Yes.
I think I was more excited about his first steps than I was Jamie's, which is terrible.
So, how are you doing? Are you, um, are you still upset about that Peyton thing? Not as upset as I am that Lucas snuck off to see her the other night.
- He did not.
Why? - I haven't asked.
I'm not so sure I want to know.
You should ask him.
It's probably nothing.
I know.
It's just suddenly, everything we do involves Peyton somehow.
- Well, that's not true.
- Hey.
I'm sorry.
Whenever you get a second, I need to talk to you, okay? Sure.
Maybe it's a little true.
All right.
That better not be yours.
Aw, nah, man.
It ain't mine.
I don't even drink shots.
Please.
I-I'm more of a - I'm not old enough.
- Well, then whose is it? Oh, that's mine.
Just walked away for a second.
Walking away-- sounds like a good idea.
- Lucas, right? - Yeah.
This is for you.
Why are women so screwed up? - Let me guess-- Peyton.
- How'd you know? 'Cause she sent you a drink with a check in it.
Yeah, we're having a tough time with the whole "friends" thing.
How did you two do it so easily? - I make everything look easy.
- Nate Peyton and I were never in love.
Yeah, well, Lindsey's mad at me, too.
And yet you seem more upset about Peyton.
- I'm gonna go find Lindsey.
- All right.
- Oh.
You bought me a drink? - Not exactly.
What were you and Lucas talking about? Exes.
Girlfriends or wives? So, then she comes out of the bedroom wearing a cape, and she tries to convert me to scientology.
And then she goes to get me a cape, and I am crawling out the window.
Well, at least you go on dates.
Guys are usually only nice to me so they can meet Brooke Davis.
Really? You know Brooke Davis? Very funny.
- Do you need to answer that? - Uh, no.
It's just work.
Thanks.
- Kind of pathetic.
- What is? Paying people to ask for your autograph so you look famous.
Okay, I don't mean to brag, but half the people in this club are wearing my designs.
Well, I don't mean to brag either, but everybody in this club is drinking one of my drinks.
Hey, Owen.
Another round.
Looks like I'm famous, too.
I bet you we have sex right on this bar.
Okay.
Wait till I leave, please.
Look, I hate to be the one to break this to you, but your mom-- I know-- is a total bitch.
I get it.
No.
I mean, yes, but she's also here.
What? Oh, mother f-- Mother.
- What the hell are you doing here? - Will you keep your voice down? I don't want the guys in here to know I'm a mother.
Why? You want them to think you're a prostitute? I noticed you rescheduled the Macy's meeting without talking to me.
I did.
Because you work for me, not the other way around.
Ah, yes.
And you've made that crystal clear.
And since you seem to think you can do everything I finally have time to party.
- You're embarrassing.
- You won't listen to reason, so maybe embarrassing you out of town is the answer.
Do whatever you want-- not gonna affect me.
We'll see.
Hey.
There you are.
What do you need? Oh, I just wanted to interrupt you and Lindsey.
Told Mia she was opening tonight.
Great.
Is she excited? Kinda.
Mia.
Hey, are you okay? No.
I'm not okay.
I'm pretty far from right now.
I've never performed in front of a crowd before-- I mean, alone.
Well, I take that back.
I sang in my school play when I was 8, and Terry Adams made me cry.
You know, what if I choke? What if everybody laughs at me? What if I'm so bad, I destroy Peyton's label? You realize you just made every shot, right? That's amazing.
I always play well when I'm not thinking about it.
Okay, great.
So when you get up onstage, don't think-- just play.
- What if I fail? - Well, people fail sometimes.
- Look at Peyton.
- Hey! Mia, you're not gonna fail.
I promise.
Okay, it's like "rock, paper, scissors," only it's called "ninja, bear, hunter.
" - And why do you play this, again? - I don't get out much.
- Okay.
- Okay.
On the count of three.
One two three.
All right.
Hunter gets bear.
Okay.
Could you excuse me for a second? - Sure.
- I'll be right back.
Well, now, that looked kinky.
Want to try it naked? - What are you doing here? - Looking for you.
Come on, let's get out of here.
Listen, Alice, I think I think maybe we went a little fast.
I like you, and I like my job.
Marvin it's fine.
Go have fun.
Enjoy your evening.
Thanks, Alice.
I'm sorry I haven't been around.
Mia's performing tonight, and she's really nervous.
How have you been? I never realized how boring bars can be without alcohol.
Yeah.
Tell me about it.
Tric needs to establish a "no mom" rule.
- I'm a mom! - You don't count.
You got married and pregnant before you graduated high school.
You'll be safely locked in a home by the time you're 35.
Good talking to you, Brooke.
I got to get Mia backstage.
I'll see you in a bit.
It's good talking to both of you.
I'm not taking this.
Luke, if any other tenant wanted the office, you would charge them rent.
Yeah, but you're not just any other tenant.
I am now.
- Peyton, just-- - Look, if you keep talking to me, you're gonna get in trouble.
Something on your mind? No, but my mom is on my last nerve.
You got anything for that? Yeah-- alcohol.
So, what'd your mom do? I'll give you one guess.
- That's your mom? - No.
Oh, my God, it is.
I feel like I'm looking into the future here.
- It's a rough road ahead, by the way.
- Okay, we're not talking anymore.
Owen Well, looks like your future self's calling.
What do you like to drink in 20 years? Poison.
I wonder if Haley knows what kind of girl she hired to watch our son.
What kind of girl is that, exactly? The kind of girl that drinks like a fish and goes skinny-dipping late at night, when everyone else is asleep.
Oh, my God.
I-I I didn't know anyone was around.
I am so embarrassed.
Haley asked me not to wear a bikini, and then I do something even dumber.
I am so sorry.
I completely understand if you want to fire me.
No.
Look, no one's gonna fire you, okay? You do a great job, and Jamie loves you.
I'm just telling you to be careful, because if Haley had caught you, this would be a very different conversation.
- You didn't tell her? - No.
You made a mistake, right? It's not the end of the world.
Haley doesn't need to know everything.
No, she doesn't.
Hey.
I've been looking for you everywhere.
Well, if you keep looking next to Peyton, you're never gonna find me.
But I guess sneaking around with her at Tric is your new thing.
Okay, what's going on with you? Why'd you sneak over here the her night? I saw your car parked outside.
So that's why you've been so upset? Why didn't you tell me sooner? No, Luke.
You should have told me.
I didn't sneak here.
I wasn't even planning on coming here.
I saw the light on, and I tried to convince my friend to be nicer to the girl that I love.
Right.
See, I'm still trying to figure out which is which.
Lindsey.
Linds.
I need a new office.
Yeah, the one you have right now is far too big and free.
I'll settle for small and expensive.
As long as it's not Lindsey-adjacent.
Tell me I don't look like her when I dance.
Tell me I don't look like her when I dance! Okay.
If you tell me Lindsey's a bitch.
Oh, my mom's a bitch.
Lindsey's a bitch.
Is there a woman here tonight you haven't called a bitch? Well, I can think of one.
Lindsey is just threatened by you.
Why? It's not like I'm even after Lucas.
So you keep saying.
What? You don't believe me? Okay.
Fine.
Whatever.
But for the record-- you look exactly like her when you dance! Bitch! I do not.
Hey.
So, what were we talking about before you left? - How cute you are.
- Really? I-I think I would have remembered that.
I'm really glad Brooke set us up.
I'm sorry.
No.
I hate it when hot girls hit on me, too.
What's the first line of my song? - Didn't you write it? - So not the point right now.
Okay.
Relax.
You're gonna be great, Mia.
And, honestly, what is the worst thing that could happen? He just walked in.
Can I buy you a drink? Actually, my date took care of that.
Well, we're halfway there, then.
I hope you're not trying to sit on my lap.
I'm just looking for someone to dance with.
No, thanks.
You know where to find me.
I've never seen your jealous side before.
And you still haven't.
Okay.
What up, Nate? Yo, thanks for having my back earlier in front of old man Scott.
Quentin, how stupid are you for trying to drink in the same club as your coach? Look who's talking-- you flirtin' with that hot nanny - in the same club as your wife.
- I'm not flirting with anyone.
Oh, okay.
You had my back, so I got yours, but I know flirtin' when I see it.
And it look like she does, too, bro.
Okay.
She's almost on.
How's she doing? I think she'll be okay as long as the only lyrics to her songs are "why is Jason here?", "why is Jason here?" Why is Jason here? Because I invited him.
I'm sorry.
You what? Look, Mia, most people dream of the chance to stand up to the person that's kept them down.
This is yours.
Someone just tell me the first line of my song, please.
It's "I never feared the unexpected.
" Ladies and gentlemen, Mia Catalano.
Okay.
You're on.
- Really? You invited Jason? - Oh, hell no.
Hi.
You suck! Get off the stage, ho! Hey.
Why don't you shut the hell up? Choke.
Brooke.
Will you do me a favor? If it involves drinking and flirting with the hot bartender, then yes, I can.
You like Peyton and Lindsey, right? What kind of favor is this? I was hoping maybe you could talk to them.
I'd love to help you, Luke, but I honestly don't see the point.
I like Lindsey, but Peyton is my best friend.
And does either one of us really believe she didn't come back here for you? What's that? It's called a bitter shrew.
It's from her.
Thank you so much.
Hey.
What happened with you and Milly? I just don't think it's good timing right now.
I've been really busy with work lately.
Are you feeling okay? I hand-deliver a hot girl to you, and you're worried about work? My mother would want to adopt you.
Listen, I'm having enough problems with older ladies running my life.
What are you talking about? I've kind of been seeing my boss.
- Define "seeing.
" - Sleeping with.
Define "sleeping with.
" Well I wish you'd told me before I got Milly all worked up.
Oh, Millicent was great.
I really liked her.
I-I just Alice is considering me for an on-air position, and those are hard to get.
Marvin McFadden, did I just hear you correctly? - What have you become? - I know.
I know.
- Things have just gotten complicated-- - So uncomplicate them.
When you find the boy that I used to know you should have him give Milly a call.
You have two choices-- you can use the number or use the napkin.
I'm sorry.
I-I can't.
Please welcome the Honorary Title! Thank you, Jason.
If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have been so good.
You think you were good? The only reason people were clapping is I told them you were retarded.
You're just upset because the talent left your band.
Not as upset as I am that you left your granny panties in my bed.
Nathan! Nathan! Hey! He's not worth it, okay? Let it go! Yeah, it's not worth it, Nathan.
You're lucky.
You ain't that lucky.
You're so right.
Tree Hill is so much better than Milan.
- You are acting like an idiot.
- And you are acting like a child.
The difference is, I know my behavior's ridiculous.
Since returning to this god-awful town, you've lost your way.
Really? Is that what you think, mom? Because I feel like I have finally found it.
I am happy here.
I have friends who care about me.
These are not your friends.
Friends don't use you.
Neither do mothers.
Oh, please.
I've done nothing but help you.
Your little company was struggling until you came to me.
But if you think you can do it alone, just say the word.
You'll only lose a C.
E.
O and a mother.
Mom.
You're not a kid anymore.
So grow up.
When are you gonna grow up? This is our first time back in a bar since your accident, and already you're in another fight.
Have you learned nothing? What do you expect me to do-- just sit back and watch while some jerk harasses you? That's exactly what I expect you to do, because you're not always the guy that has to jump in and do something, and I'm not a damsel in distress.
And if your last bar brawl didn't make it clear, - you're not Superman.
- You're overreacting.
I didn't even hit the guy.
I just walked away.
No.
I pulled you away, and then Quentin hit him.
I guess he is really learning from the best.
Hey, I'm exhausted from spending the night avoiding you and Peyton, - so I think I'll catch a cab home.
- Hey, hey.
Don't be ridiculous.
- Come on, I'll drive you.
- It's not ridiculous, Lucas.
This is.
What are you talking about? Your hair looks great.
Of course you think so.
It's Peyton blond.
- I'm single white female.
- No, you're not.
I'm not blaming you.
I'm blaming me.
Ever since Peyton came to Tree Hill, I've been acting like a crazy bitch.
I'm neurotic, insecure, paranoid, jealous, - and that is not who I am.
- And I know that.
But it's who I've become.
I'm not stupid or blind.
I know Peyton's the reason you're writing again, and I refuse to be a chapter in that book.
Look, Lindsey.
Lindsey, wait.
No, I've been waiting-- for you, for the book.
I moved here for you remember? So you need to figure out what you want.
I want you.
And I want you to stop being in love with Peyton.
Looks like we're both screwed.
Why are you here? When I asked if we were dating, you laughed in my face.
Then you see me with someone else and send me a mean text? That text was not mean.
If you kissed her, then you would have seen mean.
It's fascinating that you have different levels of mean, but I think I'll get off at this one.
Haven't you learned? You only get off when I do.
Well, then I hope you just did, because we're done.
This is over.
I'm sorry to hear that, Marvin.
But if that's the way you really feel then you're fired.
Then I guess I'm fired.
But thank you for showing me that there are more important things in life than work.
You know what? Just rip up the check.
I'm moving offices, anyway.
Do you have an alarm in your head that goes off every time I'm happy with someone else? What do you want from me?! I fly to L.
A.
, I ask you to marry me.
You said no, so I moved on.
Why haven't you? 'Cause I should have said yes.
Luke, I was young and I was scared.
And I did not realize that by saying I wasn't ready, it would mean that we would never be together again.
Had I known that, I would have said yes.
- Peyton - No, Luke, I miss you every day.
And I've told everyone here that I didn't come back for you.
But I did.
Of course I did.
I still love you, Lucas.
Peyton, I You still love me, don't you? I have to go see Lindsey.
I came back for Lucas.
I know.
You've had your Lucas-stealing face on since you picked me up at the airport.
- What Lucas-stealing face? - The only face you've got.
Well, it doesn't even matter now.
He's with Lindsey.
Honey Lindsey doesn't stand a chance.
Trust me.
I have been the Lindsey between Lucas and Peyton, and it is not a great place to be.
Yeah, neither is the place I'm at.
Are you kidding? You're Peyton Sawyer.
The guy wrote a whole book about how much he loves you.
You think he still does? It has always been Lucas and Peyton.
You guys are meant to be together.
It's the way it's supposed to be.
So go and get your man.
And this time if he proposes, please say yes.
Okay? Wait.
If I came back for Lucas, then why did you come back? Duh-- for Lucas.
Game on, bitch.
Good night.
I think she's still pissed at me.
She'll come around.
I mean, what girl wouldn't want her guy to stand up for her? I know I would.
No, I mean, she's right.
I need to watch my temper.
All it ever does is get me in trouble.
Well, I'd love a guy to come to my rescue.
Does that mean I like trouble? I'm a little drunk, so in case I said a lot of inappropriate things tonight, I want you to know I meant all of them.
I think I'll go for a swim.
I knew you were watching the other night.
I'm glad you were.
But you can see a lot better with the lights on.
Buy you a drink? I better not.
I'm supposed to be an adult now, and I don't want to end up like my future self.
You're like, what, 22, right? So, legally, this is supposed to be new to you.
You're acting your age.
It's your mother that isn't.
Well, she just came here to embarrass me.
Isn't that what moms do? I guess.
You don't really think I'll end up like her, do you? Drunk at a bar with no friends? Never.
You got friends.
Right.
Okay.
So, are you gonna ask me out now, or what? Nah.
Too young for me.
Maybe when you grow up.
Is this the champagne room? Hales, I'm sorry, okay? I tried to be responsible tonight, but that idiot got out of line.
I promise I wasn't gonna hit him.
Please don't be mad at me.
I'm not mad.
I'm I'm disappointed.
- In me? - In a lot of things.
I guess I should just be happy you're not sneaking around with another girl.
Lindsey, I'm sorry.
I never wanted-- Lucas asked me to marry him.

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