Phineas and Ferb s02e04 Episode Script

Attack of the 50 Foot Sister (15 min)

(Song: Flawless Girl) You know you want to be her She's a Flawless Girl (Flawless Girl) All the boys say when they meet her She's a Flawless Girl (Flawless Girl) She's at the forefront of every trend Never less than 5 foot 10 And if you use our products, then You can be a Flawless Girl A Flawless Girl Flawless Girl.
Because nobody's perfect without using our cosmetics.
Oh, I'd be so lost without Flawless Girl giving me some pointers on how to look.
Hey, look! It says Flawless Girl founder, Blanca Dishon, will be at this year's Midsummer's Festival, in search of the next Flawless Girl spokesmodel.
And maybe I should sign up.
Just out of curiosity, when is the Midsummer's Festival? Probably in the middle of summer.
Which is about now! Oh, what do you know.
Must be the middle of summer.
It's the Baljeet Signal! Phineas and Ferb, days ago, you helped me build a portal to Mars.
Now, I beg you to help me win the Biggest Watermelon Contest at the festival.
Help me, Phineas and Ferb.
You're my only hope! Ferb, grab that Junior Chemistry Set you got for Bastille Day.
We're going to the festival.
Hey, where's Perry? Oh, for crying out loud! Who put a secret entrance at the bottom of the neighbors' koi pond? Okay, look-look-look.
To avoid a lawsuit, give the fish hats, and we'll make them agents, and uh Ooh, right! Agent P, your mission.
Um You know, Doofenshmirtz! Go! Perry! Hey, Baljeet.
Where's your watermelon? Here.
Look at it! It mocks me, bringing shame to my family.
Ferb, time for a little chemistry.
Hmm.
Could I borrow Ferb sometime? The Flawless Girl booth.
Where is it? Hey, you! Girl! Don't you ever look in the mirror and end up feeling bad about yourself? Well For just five dollars, you can feel good about yourself for no time! Oh, I don't need that.
I've got Flawless Girl cosmetics to make me feel good.
and bada bing bada boom, you've got your miracle growth elixir.
What are you guys up to? Hey, Candace! We're gonna help Baljeet win the Biggest Watermelon Contest.
What's that, a cantaloupe? Aww! Not for long.
It worked! Your miracle growth elixir has turned you into giant nerds! I will call my family and tell them to start putting up the shame curtains.
No way! It hasn't taken full effect yet.
You'll see.
Not through the shame curtains, I won't.
Next! You're Blanca Dishon! I'm Candace.
I'm here to become your next Flawless Girl.
Stand over by that sign, please.
Hmm.
Aren't you a little short to be the next Flawless Girl? Uh Yes.
Yes, you are.
But I'm 5 foot 8! Look, it's right in our song.
"At the forefront of every trend.
Never less than five-foot-ten.
" I thought you were just looking for a rhyme.
Nobody is perfect.
But you can come close by buying our complete line of Flawless Girl skin care products.
Next! So I can never be perfect! No matter what I do, I'll always be two inches too ugly! I need a sudden growth spurt in the next fifteen minutes.
Oh, honey, it's not bad.
I got it! Thanks, Mom! Uh You're welcome! All this waiting is maddening.
Maybe we should put some more growth elixir on it? Actually, it only works once.
Putting more on it won't make it grow anymore.
But be patient.
It's not done yet.
Yes.
It worked! I feel great! In fact, I feel flawless! It's amazing! Your height is now perfect! You're now in the running to be the next Flawless Girl.
So Are there Fireside Boys, too? Run! I am going to need a crane! And a new pair of pants.
There you are! So what happened? I'm in! Auditions start in two hours! Hey, is there something different about you? Who knows? Maybe I've grown out of my awkward phase.
Looks like you're growing into another one.
Oh, no! I have to find a mirror! Oh, thank goodness! I look totally normal.
Ooh! Are you okay, Candace? Wait a second.
If you look like that, wha– wha– wha– I've turned into Bobblehead Candace! No one will forego the five dollars to see my pathetic oddballs anymore.
I gotta find some new talent fast.
I'm gonna have to call you back, Nana.
Phineas and Ferb! They did this to me, they can undo it! Pssst! Phineas! Yes, strange talking tent? No, it's me, Candace! That's what happened to the growth elixir.
Please tell me you have some sort of shrinking antidote! No.
But don't worry.
We'll get right on it.
Someone's coming! Hello, boys.
The name's P.
P.
Otter.
I run the Oddball Show.
Aren't you gonna introduce me to your friend in the tent? Oh.
That's our sister.
Our big sister.
Ugh! Okay, sorry.
Candace, this is P.
P.
Yeah, we've met.
How would you like to make me rich beyond your wildest dreams? Sorry, I'm kinda going through something at the moment.
Well, if ya change your mind, give me a call.
Okay, guys, you gotta change me back! The Flawless Girl auditions are in a couple of hours! Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! What the–?! Oh, the festival is so loud I can't even hear my own evil jingle! Okay, guys.
Take it from the top.
Louder! A-one, two Doofenshmirtz Evil Incor— What the– Oh, what now?! A banjo-playing platypus? Perry the Banjo-Playing Platypus?!?! Uh, take five, guys.
Not you, Perry the Platypus, if-if I can just have a word with you.
It's a cute little trap, isn't it? I got the idea at my cousin Gertrude's baby shower.
Don't judge me, men go to baby showers these days! It was fun.
Presents, blindfolded diapering I'm sorry.
I-I'm off-topic, aren't I? I-It's this darn Midsummer's Festival! With the laughing and the music and the constant ringing on my bell to use my bathroom! Well, I'm going to put an end to it once and for all! You see, I have created a device that would cover the entire Midsummer's Festival with the worst smell in the history of mankind! Dirty diapers! And, yeah, I got all that from a baby shower.
How do you like me now, Perry the Judgapus? Can't you you just make up some kind of reducing cream? Or an amazing shrink ray device? Well, we'll see what we can do, but we're not magicians.
I'm a freak! I'll never be a Flawless Girl! There's only one place where a girl like me will fit in! The Oddball Show! It was nice knowing you boys! Tell Mom and Dad I love 'em! From now on, I'll be living amongst the carnies! Excellent! Now all we need is a big promotional stunt! Here's what I got in mind.
In a reversal of a familiar theme, you can climb a skyscraper carrying me dressed in this gorilla suit.
Um Okay How long have you been wearing that? All day! So, Perry the Platypus, I found a way to distill the smell of dirty diapers into a concentrated liquid form, which I will spread throughout the festival using my Smell-inator! And the next Flawless Girl is Oh, that is the most Flawless Girl I've ever seen! Is all this really necessary? C'mon, kid, you can't back out now! Candace, I've got some great news! I can't hear you! Oh, hold on! I said, "I've got some great news!" You are the next Flawless Girl! With your height, girls will never be able to live up to the expectations you'll set! They'll be forced to buy my product forever! Scram! She's my oddball! No! My Flawless Girl! She's a freak! She's freakishly beautiful! Wait a second! I just realized something! You both make money off the people's natural insecurities.
You show people oddballs so that they'll feel better about themselves, and you make beauty totally unobtainable so they'll feel worse about themselves! Look at me! I'm 50 feet tall now and it's still out of reach! Well, I've had it! Making beauty the focus of my life has distracted me from the real focus of my life.
Busting my brothers.
Giant Candace is out, peace! Growth elixir? So this is what she used! Let me see that! It's my growth elixir! No, it's mine! Mine! Mine! Now watch as the smell of dirty diapers pollutes the very molecules that surround this building! I just snap it into place and set the range for, say, Hear that, Perry the Platypus? That is the sound of smell! Nothing can stop me now! Uh-oh.
The whole universe? Not good.
Mom! Mom! Look what Phineas and Ferb did to me! I'm 50 feet tall! I don't even fit in.
the house.
I'm back to normal! "Normal" being a relative term.
Well, doesn't smell any different.
I wonder what went wrong.
Oh, here's my stinky poo-poo stuff! I thought I put this in the Smell-inator.
Nooooo! Agent P! Oh, no! That is– W-What was I thinking? So did you win the giant watermelon contest? I was about to when this happened! So the watermelon shrank? Well, either that or everything else in the universe just got bigger.
C'est la vie.
Shame curtains are not going to hang themselves.

Previous EpisodeNext Episode