Phineas and Ferb s03e53 Episode Script
Doofapus (15 min)
That's one exotic dragon-fruit smoothie for you and one for you! I'm just saying as a non sequitur, a talking zebra just seems a little Forced? Yeah, forced! Hmm! The sweet taste of an unusual and exotic smoothie! You know, this smoothie isn't really unusual or exotic.
It's about as exotic as a staycation with Aunt Meryl! But, Buford, your postcard said that she had a pool.
She has a patio.
Tomorrow, we should work on Buford's penmanship.
Actually, most would consider dragon-fruit to be that exotic, indeed.
Known for its dazzling flowers, it is actually the fruit of severalâ What are you doing? Stâ Stop that.
Stâ Pâ Paâ Stop that.
You know, Buford's kind of right.
These smoothies are sort of exotic, but I think we can do better.
What do you think, Phineas? What do I think? Don't answer that.
Guys, I know what we're gonna do today! I wonder what kind of smoothie Perry would like? Come in.
Sit down, Agent P.
We have a serious problem.
It seems someone, and I'm not saying who, someone has spilled on the couch in the lobby.
Sir, Iâ A very expensive couch when we bought it in 1985.
Sir, all I did was turn the cushion over.
The stain was alreadyâ If the responsible party is present Sir, it was Agent M.
He spilled a latte in 1990.
Ugh, we were hoping to get him there a couple of years out of that couch.
Anyhoo? Uh Anyhoo, our surveillance operatives have been getting some mixed signals from Doofenshmirtz.
He was observed at the Danville Library, checking out books on Eastern Australia and hydrostatic cell fusion.
We haven't come up with any ideas about what he's up to Maybe he's trying to recreate Pangaea, sir.
Like I said, we haven't come up with anything yet.
So, we need you to get in there and find out.
Good luck, and be careful out there.
Okay, everyone! Ferb and I developed a device that can literally turn any solid into liquid, so we can enjoy all sorts of new and unusual flavors.
Isabella? Abracapocus! Wow, that was really impressive! I just got my Magic patch.
Let's try this again.
Behold! The State-of-the-Matter Transfer Device! All right, Buford, is that chicken ready? All set.
I-I got ya! There you are.
Liquid poultry.
Hmm.
Tastes like chicken.
I think we need to try something a little more Foul? Yeah, fâ No! Exotic! Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! Well, hello, Perry the Platypus! Over here.
No, here.
L-Look aâ Look a little more this way.
What do you think, huh? I've joined you in the genus Ornithorhynchus.
That's right, I am a platypus! That's right, I am a platypus! Yeah, hang on, let me turn off the dramatic lighting.
How did this come to be? Well, I'll tell you, since you didn't ask.
After years of being bested by your battle, I decided to fight fire with fire.
And in both cases, "fire" means platypus and "with" just means with.
It was simple! The best way to beat a platypus was to become a platypus! That way, our skills would be evenly matched.
So, after a couple of promising experiments and some intricate designs, I finally created the Platyp-inator! Pretty cool, huh? Now, before I defeat you, I think that I should further level the playing field.
There! Now I'm trapped, too.
And go! You'reâ Y-You're not struggling, I-I said go.
We should both beâ Yeah, like that.
Okay.
Isabella, you wanna go next? Why, yes.
How about a romantic dinner for two? Wanna sip, Phineas? Oh, no, thanks.
Oh, okay.
I understand.
You know, you want to keep yourself open to other drink options.
I get it.
Actually, I-I didn't want to say anything in front of everybody, but, it'sâ I don't like zucchini.
Oh.
And that is why we wear white shoes after Labor Day.
And I Oh, I knew it.
Phineas and Ferb.
Not very impressive, but suspicious.
Stacy, Iâ I gotta go.
Oh, and happy birthday! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Oh, laundry.
Sometimes, I feel like our first president, because I'm washing a ton.
Ah, yeah.
Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! You have to come out to the backyard! Oh, hey, Candace.
I feel like our first president becauseâ No time for the stand-up routine, Mom.
You've gotta come out to the backyard.
Okay, I'll be right out.
HURRY! (Song: When Platypi Fight) Let's go! The time is now, they're gonna do their dance No room for negotiation One's got a hat Neither has pants, but that bears no further explanation I think you know what's gonna go down Yeah, there's gonna be a platypus throwdown! Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! It's a fracas, it's a fray It's a monotreme melee Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! If you're watching at home, there's a seven-second delay Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! It's a duck-billed duel It's a beaver-tailed battle Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! Gonna smack you so hard that your teeth are gonna rattle It's a platypus fight! What is this thing? Some sort of souped-up techno-geek camera? I wonder what itâ Phineas and Ferb! No! Get off! Ew! Well, that's funny.
I could've sworn she said backyard.
Oh, well.
If anyone needs me, I'll be washing a ton.
Let's see, we've got horseradish, durians, and turmeric.
I've got a mountain yam.
I cannot wait to taste liquified sea salt.
Hey! Watch where you're steering those sneakers, bub! Candace? You're a smoothie? Phineas, you've gotta fix this! That is so cool! Uh, what does it feel like? It feels like you're in big trouble! Ferb, we're gonna need some sponges and a bucket! Phew! This whole evenly matched thing is exhausting.
How about we take a short break? Do you ever get tired of lugging this big tail around? I mean, sure, it's great for fighting, but it's kinda weird for sitting and stuff.
I just figure I'd ask you because, you know You would know.
U-Uh, sugar or agave syrup? Here.
I-I don't know if this is fur or really tiny feathers.
I can't tell.
It's so warm, but it breathes.
Well, back at it, I guess.
Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight It's a fracas, it's a fray It's a moâ Okay.
These are the last drops of her.
Hurry up and change me before that bird comes back! Sure thing, Candace.
We reversed the polarity, and it should do the trick.
Now, try not to ripple.
This does not feel like the reverse of being a bucket of water.
Hmm, so it would seem.
I don't know, I kinda like her like that.
She looks like Cand-berry sauce.
We gotta get her back into the right shape before we solidify her.
We're gonna need to adjust the contouringâ Cand-berry sauce.
Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! It's a duck-billed duuueeelll Hang in there, Candace.
This mold that Buford brought over should help us put her back together.
Tell me again why you have a life-sized mold of Candace.
I got life-sized molds of all my friends.
I'm not so sure how I feel about that.
All set, Candace! Now, wait right there.
Ha-ha.
Very funny.
Okay.
Here we go! Candace, come on out! I'm me! Glorious me! You did it! You guys are so o busted! You guys are so o busted! You guys are so o busted! Okay, Perry the Platypus, this isn't working.
I need to become something stronger than a platypus.
Let's see, what'sâ What's stronger than a platypus? Two platypuses, that's it! I've got just the thing right over here.
Behold! My Double-inator! There! Nice and clean.
Ha! Now we're both a couple of good-looking dishes.
Bah-da-da-duh-duh! Thank you, I'll be here all night.
Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Candace, watch this.
I was just looking at this plate, and I said, "There, nice and" Not right now! Candace, my hands are wet.
I'll just shoot myself with this baby, and then I will have the advantage because there will be two of meâ Anyone else see that? I wonder what that hit.
Whatever it is, there's two of them now.
Soon there's gonna be two of me, and then nothing can defeat me! Except maybe a bigger platypus made out of metal.
Yeah, like that.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus! Even though I'm also a platypus at this point, and, uh I hope this wears off soon.
The novelty has worn thin.
Come on, come on, come on! Oh, hi, Mom! I'm sorry, Mom, but you've got to see this.
Feast your eyes on puddles.
Feast your eyes on puddles.
Yeah, I saw 'em earlier.
But, Mom, they had a machine that would turn things into smoothie, andâ I didn't see it, Candace.
And Buford had a mold, of me! Buford's got molds of all of us, Candace.
Oh, there you are, Perry! Oh, well, I guess at least I'm back to normal.
Me, too! Oh, good for youâ Oh, whaâ?!
It's about as exotic as a staycation with Aunt Meryl! But, Buford, your postcard said that she had a pool.
She has a patio.
Tomorrow, we should work on Buford's penmanship.
Actually, most would consider dragon-fruit to be that exotic, indeed.
Known for its dazzling flowers, it is actually the fruit of severalâ What are you doing? Stâ Stop that.
Stâ Pâ Paâ Stop that.
You know, Buford's kind of right.
These smoothies are sort of exotic, but I think we can do better.
What do you think, Phineas? What do I think? Don't answer that.
Guys, I know what we're gonna do today! I wonder what kind of smoothie Perry would like? Come in.
Sit down, Agent P.
We have a serious problem.
It seems someone, and I'm not saying who, someone has spilled on the couch in the lobby.
Sir, Iâ A very expensive couch when we bought it in 1985.
Sir, all I did was turn the cushion over.
The stain was alreadyâ If the responsible party is present Sir, it was Agent M.
He spilled a latte in 1990.
Ugh, we were hoping to get him there a couple of years out of that couch.
Anyhoo? Uh Anyhoo, our surveillance operatives have been getting some mixed signals from Doofenshmirtz.
He was observed at the Danville Library, checking out books on Eastern Australia and hydrostatic cell fusion.
We haven't come up with any ideas about what he's up to Maybe he's trying to recreate Pangaea, sir.
Like I said, we haven't come up with anything yet.
So, we need you to get in there and find out.
Good luck, and be careful out there.
Okay, everyone! Ferb and I developed a device that can literally turn any solid into liquid, so we can enjoy all sorts of new and unusual flavors.
Isabella? Abracapocus! Wow, that was really impressive! I just got my Magic patch.
Let's try this again.
Behold! The State-of-the-Matter Transfer Device! All right, Buford, is that chicken ready? All set.
I-I got ya! There you are.
Liquid poultry.
Hmm.
Tastes like chicken.
I think we need to try something a little more Foul? Yeah, fâ No! Exotic! Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! Well, hello, Perry the Platypus! Over here.
No, here.
L-Look aâ Look a little more this way.
What do you think, huh? I've joined you in the genus Ornithorhynchus.
That's right, I am a platypus! That's right, I am a platypus! Yeah, hang on, let me turn off the dramatic lighting.
How did this come to be? Well, I'll tell you, since you didn't ask.
After years of being bested by your battle, I decided to fight fire with fire.
And in both cases, "fire" means platypus and "with" just means with.
It was simple! The best way to beat a platypus was to become a platypus! That way, our skills would be evenly matched.
So, after a couple of promising experiments and some intricate designs, I finally created the Platyp-inator! Pretty cool, huh? Now, before I defeat you, I think that I should further level the playing field.
There! Now I'm trapped, too.
And go! You'reâ Y-You're not struggling, I-I said go.
We should both beâ Yeah, like that.
Okay.
Isabella, you wanna go next? Why, yes.
How about a romantic dinner for two? Wanna sip, Phineas? Oh, no, thanks.
Oh, okay.
I understand.
You know, you want to keep yourself open to other drink options.
I get it.
Actually, I-I didn't want to say anything in front of everybody, but, it'sâ I don't like zucchini.
Oh.
And that is why we wear white shoes after Labor Day.
And I Oh, I knew it.
Phineas and Ferb.
Not very impressive, but suspicious.
Stacy, Iâ I gotta go.
Oh, and happy birthday! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Oh, laundry.
Sometimes, I feel like our first president, because I'm washing a ton.
Ah, yeah.
Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! You have to come out to the backyard! Oh, hey, Candace.
I feel like our first president becauseâ No time for the stand-up routine, Mom.
You've gotta come out to the backyard.
Okay, I'll be right out.
HURRY! (Song: When Platypi Fight) Let's go! The time is now, they're gonna do their dance No room for negotiation One's got a hat Neither has pants, but that bears no further explanation I think you know what's gonna go down Yeah, there's gonna be a platypus throwdown! Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! It's a fracas, it's a fray It's a monotreme melee Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! If you're watching at home, there's a seven-second delay Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! It's a duck-billed duel It's a beaver-tailed battle Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! Gonna smack you so hard that your teeth are gonna rattle It's a platypus fight! What is this thing? Some sort of souped-up techno-geek camera? I wonder what itâ Phineas and Ferb! No! Get off! Ew! Well, that's funny.
I could've sworn she said backyard.
Oh, well.
If anyone needs me, I'll be washing a ton.
Let's see, we've got horseradish, durians, and turmeric.
I've got a mountain yam.
I cannot wait to taste liquified sea salt.
Hey! Watch where you're steering those sneakers, bub! Candace? You're a smoothie? Phineas, you've gotta fix this! That is so cool! Uh, what does it feel like? It feels like you're in big trouble! Ferb, we're gonna need some sponges and a bucket! Phew! This whole evenly matched thing is exhausting.
How about we take a short break? Do you ever get tired of lugging this big tail around? I mean, sure, it's great for fighting, but it's kinda weird for sitting and stuff.
I just figure I'd ask you because, you know You would know.
U-Uh, sugar or agave syrup? Here.
I-I don't know if this is fur or really tiny feathers.
I can't tell.
It's so warm, but it breathes.
Well, back at it, I guess.
Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight It's a fracas, it's a fray It's a moâ Okay.
These are the last drops of her.
Hurry up and change me before that bird comes back! Sure thing, Candace.
We reversed the polarity, and it should do the trick.
Now, try not to ripple.
This does not feel like the reverse of being a bucket of water.
Hmm, so it would seem.
I don't know, I kinda like her like that.
She looks like Cand-berry sauce.
We gotta get her back into the right shape before we solidify her.
We're gonna need to adjust the contouringâ Cand-berry sauce.
Fight, fight! There's a platypus fight! It's a duck-billed duuueeelll Hang in there, Candace.
This mold that Buford brought over should help us put her back together.
Tell me again why you have a life-sized mold of Candace.
I got life-sized molds of all my friends.
I'm not so sure how I feel about that.
All set, Candace! Now, wait right there.
Ha-ha.
Very funny.
Okay.
Here we go! Candace, come on out! I'm me! Glorious me! You did it! You guys are so o busted! You guys are so o busted! You guys are so o busted! Okay, Perry the Platypus, this isn't working.
I need to become something stronger than a platypus.
Let's see, what'sâ What's stronger than a platypus? Two platypuses, that's it! I've got just the thing right over here.
Behold! My Double-inator! There! Nice and clean.
Ha! Now we're both a couple of good-looking dishes.
Bah-da-da-duh-duh! Thank you, I'll be here all night.
Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Candace, watch this.
I was just looking at this plate, and I said, "There, nice and" Not right now! Candace, my hands are wet.
I'll just shoot myself with this baby, and then I will have the advantage because there will be two of meâ Anyone else see that? I wonder what that hit.
Whatever it is, there's two of them now.
Soon there's gonna be two of me, and then nothing can defeat me! Except maybe a bigger platypus made out of metal.
Yeah, like that.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus! Even though I'm also a platypus at this point, and, uh I hope this wears off soon.
The novelty has worn thin.
Come on, come on, come on! Oh, hi, Mom! I'm sorry, Mom, but you've got to see this.
Feast your eyes on puddles.
Feast your eyes on puddles.
Yeah, I saw 'em earlier.
But, Mom, they had a machine that would turn things into smoothie, andâ I didn't see it, Candace.
And Buford had a mold, of me! Buford's got molds of all of us, Candace.
Oh, there you are, Perry! Oh, well, I guess at least I'm back to normal.
Me, too! Oh, good for youâ Oh, whaâ?!