Pie In The Sky (1994) s02e07 Episode Script

Swan in His Pride

1 S02xE07 "Swan in His Pride" Feb 26, 1995 Volare Cantare Oh, oh, oh, oh Hey! Fabrizio Modiano, I´m arresting you on suspicion of the murder of Lorraine Foster.
What?! She´s dead, Barry.
Lorraine´s dead! And I´m arresting you for her murder.
Cuff him.
Have you read this? Yes.
Well? Well he only says "thinks.
" He thinks he got Delhi-belly in this restaurant.
It´ll have to be sorted out.
Finish that? Yes, Mr.
Crabbe.
Now, disinfecting this, this, and this.
Right, chef.
Bleach.
One part bleach to four parts water.
Boiling water.
Watch your hands, use the rubber gloves.
Right, Chef.
John, same out there.
I want the whole restaurant disinfected.
Well, I can´t do it all before supper, Mr.
Crabbe.
That´s all right.
Do it bit by bit the next couple of days.
Nicola will help.
What do you want?! Well, I´ve come to wash up.
Wash up?! Look at those boots! They´re filthy! Well, I´ll take them off.
Oh, please.
We´re disinfecting here.
Now, out, out! Get out! Get back.
Go on, out! Give him a brush.
Scrub outside.
- Coffee? - Oh, yeah.
Hang on! Wipe your feet.
It´s so hygienic, I can´t even go in.
I bet.
Thank you.
Hello, Freddy.
Hello.
Is he here? In the dinning room.
I´m afraid I´ve got to take him away for a few days.
Oh.
Just like the old times, Henry.
You and me setting the world to rights.
Well, just so long as it´s finished by 8:00 on Friday night.
What happens then? I get about 50 people turning up at my front door demanding to be fed.
It´s just a few inquiries.
But Assistant Chief Constables don´t do just a few inquiries.
It´s a murder.
A couple young girls.
Severn Constabulary think they´ve got a serial killer.
Well, haven´t they got policemen of their own? Yes, squad drawn from three counties.
Oh, but not ours.
- No.
- No.
No.
Sounds ominous, that.
It´s a discipline inquiry.
Ah, a disciplinary inquiry, eh? So, what went wrong? Their third murder.
Lorraine Valerie Foster, a Detective Sergeant on the murder squad.
Newspapers haven´t got hold of it yet.
Head Chief Constable has asked me to do the honors.
And you´re going to join the murder squad undercover, of course.
Me As an expert in computer profiling.
They´ve been told you had an FBI course.
But I haven´t, have I? Don´t you think they might notice that? I´ve got all the computer software and a profiling book.
You can mug it up.
It´s cold.
So is Lorraine.
She was my girl.
Why would I kill her? That was her job.
She didn´t care for you.
Oh, she did, and you´re jealous.
Drink your tea, Barry.
It´s all right, Connor.
I´m not going to hurt him.
Not yet.
I want to set my own agenda here, Henry.
There´s a lot at stake.
Really? What´s at stake? It´s just an expression.
Just an expression? There wouldn´t by any chance be a Chief Constable´s post coming vacant, would there? The Deputy Chief retires next year.
Oh, Deputy Chief.
Do a good job here, you´ll be in the running for that then, eh? I want to show you something.
Detective Sergeant Lorraine Valerie Foster as was.
Drowned.
She was fished out of the Avon.
She has what appear to be defense wounds on her arms, bruising and contusion all over her upper body, and this mark here.
Which is what? A ligature mark.
Something extremely strong.
Plastic coated wire, nylon line, that sort of thing.
That killed her? I couldn´t say at the moment.
She drowned.
But you don´t swim very well if you´re unconscious.
So, she could have been part strangled and then dumped into the river.
I couldn´t say at the moment.
Was it a sex crime? She appears to have recently had sex.
But whether that forms part of an assault and subsequent murder, I couldn´t say.
I´d have to wait for the results of the test.
So, the theory is she made love, was beaten up, part strangled, and then drowned? Like the wife at a Viking warrior´s funeral.
Obvious feminist.
That´s what I wanted to show you.
I´m sorry.
What? I know you.
Curiosity killed the crab.
Or at least got him shot.
But we´re not here to solve a murder.
Our subject is how the investigation was run.
Whatever you want, Sir.
You´re the chief.
Um, did she lose much blood? Not much.
The cuts are all superficial.
She´s got a broken nose, lungs are full of water, and there was some pink foam in her nasal cavities.
Classic drowning.
Um, what weapons were used to make those marks on her forearms and fingers? I don´t know.
No, we don´t know, do we? Well there was someone loved here.
Perhaps you better check in with your squad, Crabbe.
Yes, sir.
Perhaps I had.
Bye-bye.
Ms.
Watson, my man Crabbe, best not to mention his visit to D.
I.
Walker.
Careful! Don´t do this to me! Oh, you see, there´s a bend too many in the gubbins and air gets trapped.
You´re supposed to, you know, knock on the pipe.
Oh.
More than that.
Let it know you´re there.
Here! Do it again.
Steve, you´ve done it now.
Stop, man! Call a plumber! Yeah.
- Ha ha ha ha! - Higgins! Um, hi, Margaret.
Jan Connor.
Henry Crabbe, how do you do? I´ll take that.
Thank you very much.
Oh, we´ve put you over here.
All right.
Oh, this is Tenny Fine.
Henry Crabbe.
Hello.
Sir.
Aha.
D.
S.
Foster´s desk? We´re pushed for space.
There.
D.
I.
Crabbe.
No, Henry, please.
What are you, Henry, a Mac man or an IBM clone? Ah, a bit of both, really.
Ha ha.
Kept a clear desk.
Lorraine didn´t like paperwork.
Never here, that´s why.
Well, she wanted to get on with it.
Lot of good that did her.
Hey, Lorraine was a good copper.
So, how come she´s so dead? I´m sorry.
She was my friend.
You all right, Jan? Yeah.
What happened? Well, the boss will tell you.
D.
I.
Dave Walker is in charge at the moment.
Our real boss is suspended.
Chief Superintendent Willis? And who might you be? Assistant Chief Constable Fisher.
Can we talk? Shall I call my lawyer? Not yet.
Eileen White died the same way as young Vanessa Grove strangled, assaulted, then dumped.
And both women crossed the paths of this sorry excuse for a human being Fabrizio Barry Modiano.
He´s of Italian extraction, and Barry, as you can see, is handsome if you like them like that.
If it wasn´t for the fact that he´s a complete psychopath, would be a randy young female´s dream lover.
Instead he´s the stuff of nightmares.
Bloody nightmares.
You want some? I can send out.
No, thank you.
And have you placed him at the murder scenes? No.
Barry is a van driver.
And his delivery notes say he was out of town.
But delivery notes, you know, are about as trustworthy as a detective´s overtime claim.
Were there any witnesses to the murders? No.
Well, is that all? It was.
We believe Modiano was the man, but we didn´t have the evidence.
I thought he might boast about the murders to a girlfriend.
She got the idea from one of those profiling books.
Really? Lorraine jumped at the idea.
Ambition.
She convinced our chief super into letting her go and pull Modiano.
She kept notes.
She even tape-recorded him.
Let´s get this straight.
Are you suggesting that D.
S.
Foster volunteered to be the girlfriend of the prime suspect in a murder inquiry? Yeah.
And this was sanctioned officially? By Detective Chief Superintendent Willis, yeah.
And she slept with him to get a confession? She was explicitly told not to.
Aha.
But did he confess? No.
This was a very ambitious woman, Crabbe.
She bludgeoned old Charlie Willis into letting her do it.
Well, it´s true.
Our old governor has been hung out to dry.
We´re in the doghouse and some jumped up ACC has been appointed to lead an inquiry.
Well, you should know him.
He´s from your force.
I´d like to hear the tapes that she passed over.
They´re restricted at the moment.
All right, what about the notes? Likewise.
The press would have a field day with them.
Well, perhaps you could show me where Lorraine was found, if that´s not a secret, too.
It was there.
Ah, yeah.
And she went in Upstream.
We still don´t know where exactly.
But not far.
Yeah.
Life goes on, eh? What´s wrong? Oh, nothing.
Would you excuse me just one second, please? Thanks a lot.
All right.
All right? Well, yes, it is, if you´re not a swan.
Poor thing has swallowed fishing line.
Ouch! Happens round here quite a lot, apparently.
You think the line around Lorraine´s neck was fishing line? Well, it could be.
But what´s the great secret about Lorraine´s tapes? Oh, nothing.
Walker´s just paranoid.
He saw you with that ACC Fisher this morning.
Ah.
He reckons you´re a snide.
A snake in the squad.
No, Jan, I´m just here to help find Lorraine´s killer, that´s all.
Look, it was Modiano, we all know.
No, you all believe.
You all believe it was Modiano.
A jury is going to need far more than that.
Here, Sherlock.
Bootleg.
Thank you very much.
I don´t suppose there´s any chance of getting to see her notebooks.
Sorry.
They´re in the safe.
Aha.
Room for a small one?! - Henry! - George! You´ve come for the job.
What, a commis chef? Sous saucier.
Oh, sous saucier! It´s quite an important job, that is.
I´d say.
Haven´t I told you that? Actually, I´ve come about the room.
All made up.
I´ll show you.
Yeah, no, no.
You´re too busy.
Just tell me, I´ll find it.
Okay, chef.
First floor at the front.
Thanks.
You know, George, this kitchen really is something.
So is yours.
Yes.
Higgins?! How many times do I have to tell you, keep out of the way of the oven?! Now, get out of the way or I´ll cook you and serve you instead, you worm! Steve! Sorry, Margaret, but how am I supposed to cook? I´ve got no tap, and I´ve got this huge, great big doorstep in the middle of the kitchen.
I rigged you up a hose pipe from outside! Yeah, but he´s always standing in the sink! I´ll get him some Wellington´s.
Use the Baby Burco.
What, to stand on? Don´t be stupid! Steve! Look, I´m sorry, Margaret.
But he´s no plumber.
And you´re no chef! You´re a rude young man.
All right, all right, that´s enough.
Now, Mr.
Higgins, have you finished? Well, I´ve still got to tidy up, you know.
You can tidy up later.
Steve Look, we´re very busy.
And we´ve run out of side plates.
Right.
Mr.
Higgins, turn the water on.
Steve, turn the dishwasher on.
John, clear table 12.
Gentleman, a moment´s silence, please.
Thank you.
Pie in the Sky, hello.
Hello, John.
Mr.
Crabbe.
Is Margaret there? She´s a bit busy at the moment up front.
Can I help at all? No, no, no.
Just tell her I rung, would you? All right, sir.
John? This is Detective Sergeant Foster, tape two, Thursday.
Come here, Fabrizio.
Barry.
How many times? Barry.
No one calls me Fabrizio.
I like it.
It´s Latin.
Come here.
I´m tired.
Well, so am I.
But come here.
Mmm.
That´s better.
Mmm.
What can I do for you, Fabrizio? What? Do? Do.
I´m your girl.
I want to make you happy.
What can I do, Fabrizio? Ha ha.
Mmm.
I don´t know.
That? If you like.
Do you like? Yes.
Fabrizio! Do you ever fantasize? Sometimes.
Do you? Yeah.
What about? You.
This.
I could die happily like this.
Don´t talk like that.
I´d die.
Ow! Isn´t that better? Yes.
Much? Much.
And didn´t I die a little? No.
Not even in your fantasies, Barry? No! Not even in my fantasies.
Wouldn´t´ you like to just push me to that edge? No, Lorraine, I wouldn´t.
Come on, Fabrizio.
Do it.
Make me die a little.
Come on.
That´s better.
Crabbe.
It´s me.
Oh, hello, Margaret.
John said you´d rung.
How are things? Less than perfect.
Tell me.
Well, I´m sitting here listening to a tape of a dead woman trying to seduce a psychopath.
Then I´m supposed to read this American murder manual.
And after that, I´m on a promise to have dinner with Fisher for a bit of light relief.
Happy? I´m delirious.
Shh! How´s George Reagan? Oh, he´s still as twinkly as ever, thank God.
How are things over there? Spiffy.
- You sure? - Yes.
No probs, darling.
Listen, I must rush.
I just called to reassure you.
Well, so did I.
Okay, bye.
Bye.
Mr.
Higgins! Hello? Well? Well? We´re all waiting for a demo.
A demo? Steak and kidney pie.
Wonderful.
Well, it´s not bad.
Excuse me.
I know this is a lazy way to open oysters But you´re going to cook them anyway.
Exactly.
Now, anchovies.
Anchovies.
Trevor, do you note that? Here.
What´s that? All right.
I´ll tell you in a minute.
Trevor trained as a pastry chef in Paris.
Did you? It´s the real secret of a good kitchen employ good people.
You know, you´re exactly right.
I´ve been very lucky on that score myself.
And the wine, Henry? Mm, now Well, it´s metallic.
Cold.
Clean.
It´s a burgundy.
Rully 1919? Hmm.
Once my pen goes on that charge sheet, that´s the end for you.
No more second chances, no more Mr.
Nice Guy.
No more opportunities to confess.
We´ll be going for you.
What, you´re not now? Give your conscience a break! Confess! To what? I´ve done nothing.
Get out.
You´re free to go.
Get out.
Nice room? Well, we´ll keep it warm for you.
Angry men.
What did you expect? I don´t expect.
The trouble is Crown Prosecution Service will only be happy if we actually video Modiano dropping some poor cow.
Which, by the way, is going to happen unless someone helps Dave Walker catch him out.
Listen to the tape? Yes.
It´s Modiano, isn´t it? It´s Modiano and we´ve just let him go.
If it is.
Yes, I know.
If it is, we have to prove it.
You do.
Because it´s not on the tape.
By the way, do you like steak and kidney pie? Yes.
Do you think Walker does? Put it in a hamburger carton, he´ll never know the difference.
Really? Anything I can do? Yes.
What´s that? Ah, the swan in his pride.
Which is? One thing hidden inside another.
Invented by Richard II´s cook.
You start off with, in his case, a swan, then work your way down to a sparrow.
I started a bit more modestly turkey.
And then what? Goose, duck, chicken, poussin, woodcock, quail.
"Things sweet to taste prove in indigestion sour.
" Sorry? Richard II.
He´s right.
It´s ghastly.
My swan in his pride isn´t even a swan, but it´s a stormer with the business customers.
Really? Girls who think of themselves as gourmets, Henry, will pay for their pleasure.
I give my clients what they ask for.
Like swan in his pride.
Sweet sauces, complicated bits of butchery.
Jet-lagged, out-of-season vegetables.
And they give me money.
Lots of it.
And while we´re on the subject of advice, if the plates are too hot to handle, you can serve any rubbish on them and they still think you´re Escoffier.
Right.
End of lesson.
Okay, Escoffier, you take that lot.
Right.
And I´ll bring these.
Right, here we are.
Sit down, please.
Take the weight from the floor.
How is it, Henry? Oh, it´s done to a turn.
No, I mean the investigation.
Is it true you believe he didn´t do it? Well, I wouldn´t say that, no.
Well, what would you say? I´ll keep an eye on the pie.
Thanks, George.
Well, I would say that in your minds, you´ve already convicted Modiano.
And we´re wrong? You might be wrong, you might be right.
And is that what you told Fisher? You are his spy in the camp.
How are your ceps? - Well? - Well? What´s the report? How do you sum us up? Well, if I were to sum you up, I would say that as a group, there´s something about you.
I don´t know, it´s as if you´re hiding something.
What? Well, I don´t know.
It´s your secret, isn´t it? Have some wine.
Now, who was Lorraine´s boyfriend? What? Well, come on.
Lorraine was a very attractive woman.
But I don´t see a Mr.
Lorraine mourning in the wings? So, presumably she had a boyfriend.
Who was he? Well, Modiano just now.
Come on.
None regular.
Lorraine was a bit Flighty.
Oh, I don´t believe you two.
What? Would you talk about a man like that? Like what? We´ve said nothing.
Don´t over-react.
She had affairs, is that what you wanted to know? Oh, now who´s talking? She had affairs, lots.
People do.
Look, was there something particularly significant about Lorraine´s affairs? Jan, that will do.
She had one on the murder squad.
Who? The governor, Mr.
Willis.
You shouldn´t have done that.
I shouldn´t have needed to.
Henry Crabbe´s steak and kidney pie.
So, the ceps were a mistake.
Jan! Are you coming? No, I´m sorry, George.
You cooked it.
Yeah.
Henry, get your coat.
Excuse me.
Lorraine Foster´s notebooks.
Thank you.
You´d better leave now.
Well, see, I´m a Detective Inspector.
If there are any complaints, I can tell your D.
I.
to push off.
You can´t.
Oh.
Okay.
Uh, do you need anything? Um No, thanks.
I´m fine.
Fine.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Oh! Did I frighten you? A bit.
What do you want? I saw you with Crabbe.
Seem to be having trouble with your loyalties, Jan.
Enough of that! No more loyalties.
No more "all boys together.
" From now on only the truth will do.
The truth? Oh, enough! Oh! I´ll tell you what´s enough.
Charlie Willis´ reputation, Lorraine´s reputation.
They´re all down the drain.
That´s enough.
I don´t want to go as well.
Why should you? Yeah.
Why should I? That´s my girl.
Come in.
Oh, you sleep well? Oh, yes.
Great, thanks.
Breakfast? There´s white sausage, Irish bacon, fresh eggs, brack.
No, I´d love to, but I´ve gotta go out.
Oh.
Have you got a date? Well, sort of.
Work, you know.
Now, look at this.
See, are there any roads through here? No, it´s all private.
So there´s no way you could get a motor car down to the riverbank? I don´t think so.
Hmm.
Oh, very nice sort of work, eh? Yeah.
You see those nice hands? Mm-hmm.
Well, if you were to die suddenly in this town, those are the very hands that would dismember you and find out why.
She´s the pathologist.
Good morning.
Hello, thank you for seeing me.
I know you´re busy in court this morning.
And I don´t want to keep you.
No, that´s fine.
What´s the problem? Well a broken nose, abrasions on the head, arms, and fingers.
- The policewoman.
- Yeah.
What about her? Well, you said she sustained those injuries defending herself.
I didn´t.
We call those "defense wounds" because that´s how they´re typically received.
But it´s not the only way.
Well, how else? Being dragged roughly.
Or tumbling over a weir? Quite.
Well? What do you smell? Nothing.
Mushrooms.
I hope you brought me up here for a reason.
That´s funny you say that.
That´s what I thought the other day "I hope he´s brought me here for a reason.
" Meaning? Meaning you didn´t tell me Lorraine Foster was the bait in a trap.
Never mind about all that.
Those murdered women were dumped in those trees behind the road the first two.
- Were they? - Yes.
Not Lorraine, though.
Lorraine went into the river.
About there.
The other women were dumped at the side of the road.
Convenient? I expect so.
The problem is there are no roads that run down to this part of the river.
Well, he could have done the deed here.
A serious change of M.
O.
You have been mugging up that book.
The other big difference is that the first two women were moved by the killer after they´d died.
Whereas here, Lorraine was alive when she went into the water.
We´re not here to solve murders.
If it is a murder.
Go on.
Well, I spoke to Ms.
Watson.
She said Lorraine´s injuries could have been caused by her body passing over the weir.
Well, she was strangled.
She may have been caught up in old fishing lines.
You mean she could have just fallen in and drowned? Would that help? For you, sir.
Thank you very much indeed.
Is he one of ours? Of course.
Do you know how much they cost an hour? He´s a traffic cop, not a messenger boy.
Well, it´s good security, sir.
Ah, interesting.
What is it? Bit of forensic confirmation.
Of? Well, it´s not important now, sir.
Look If my report noted D.
S.
Foster´s ambition And if Willis is prepared to go quietly Well, he´s an exemplary policeman.
Oh, yes.
Well, you´d have done a very good job, sir.
You´ll be in pole position if the post of Deputy Chief Constable comes up.
Except There´s always an "except.
" Yes.
Except that your exemplary policeman has been having an affair with Lorraine Foster.
No.
It´s the talk of the squad.
Oh, God.
You can just see it now, can´t you? "Police boss and murder suspect in bizarre love triangle with dead woman detective.
" We´ve gotta resolve this, Henry, before the press get it.
"We," sir? What do you want to do? Lorraine Foster was my lover.
And then she became Modiano´s girlfriend.
Were you jealous? Ah Ahem.
Is there a problem, Inspector? Mr.
Willis should be cautioned and offered a lawyer at this point, sir.
Let´s just get it over with.
Carry on.
Did you kill her? No.
But I did as good sending her to Modiano.
Modiano didn´t kill her.
Where were you the night she died? At home.
If I´d known I needed an alibi Quite.
And you, Walker? What about you? In the office, then at home.
Yes.
You at home, he was at home.
Connor was at home.
Everybody was at home.
Well, is something wrong? Everybody was at home and yet Lorraine had made an appointment.
I´m sure she didn´t.
Well, I´m sure she did.
See if you can find it in her notebook.
No.
Here´s the last page.
No appointment.
You might find it easier if you hold it against the light.
You see, she wrote the message on the last page of the notebook, and tore it out, but it scored underneath.
"Meet me at the weir.
10 P.
M.
" Was that you? No.
Oh, no, of course not.
You were at home.
Well, I´ll just have to try someone else.
Connor, for example.
Not me.
Oh, no.
You were at home as well, weren´t you? Well, it´s a mystery.
Oh, well she put the note inside an envelope.
And then she leaned on the pad to write the address.
I´ve had the marks enhanced by our forensic labs.
And they´ve come up with a name.
Now, then, Dave, which Dave is that? This is a set You cooked this up between you.
It was you she wrote to, wasn´t it? Yeah, all right.
So, it was me.
But it´s not what it seems.
I´m sorry, Charlie.
But Modiano was made in heaven for Lorraine.
Mad, bad, and with a possibility of stardom built in.
It was a dangerous game.
And you shouldn´t have let her play it! Did you meet her at the weir? I warned her off.
And how did she take that? We had a row.
She didn´t want to be told.
Did you fight? - No.
- But you argued.
We had a row.
Yeah, we had a row.
She backed up, fell in the water.
That was it.
She fell in.
You had a relationship with her, didn´t you? No.
That´s why you came to me last night.
All that guff about his reputation and Lorraine´s reputation going down the drain.
You were just worried about yourself.
Well, he shouldn´t have let her do it! You were pimping her! - No! - Yes! How did she end up in the water? She fell.
You pushed her.
No, she fell! She was gone before I could get to her.
It was dark and fast-flowing there.
I just lost her.
- Happy? - Should I be? See you on the platform.
Are you the official farewell deputation? I frightened off your friend.
Listen, Jan, never forget, people like him are political.
They have knee-jerk responses to newspaper headlines and phone calls from MPs.
Meaning? Meaning that when someone starts banging on the table and screaming for a result, see who´s twisting his arm.
We all want results.
Yes, but the police have to play the long game.
Hysteria leads to stunts like Lorraine´s.
It´s sheer dull application that finds out your man.
And if it happens again? It changes nothing.
We have to persist.
It´s the only way.
You have to persist, miss nothing, and don´t let your head drop.
Okay.
Thank you.
God bless.
Bye-bye.
He´s coming! Oh, thank you.
I´m going.
Hang on! Me tools! Me tools! Margaret.
Welcome back.
Oh! Everything all right? Fine.
All right.
Now, you go and have a nice sit-down, and I´ll bring you a cup of coffee.
- But - No buts.
Everything under control.
There.
Thank you.
How was Reagan? Same as usual.
Fisher? Ugh, foul.
But you got your man? No.
Apparently, that wasn´t the point.
Oh.
So, that´s it then? No.
That´s never it.