Regular Show (2010) s06e17 Episode Script

Happy Birthday Song Contest

1 And voilà.
Oh, this cake looks so yummy! And voilà.
Oh, this cake looks so yummy! And now I'm gonna eat the whole oh, this cake looks so yummy! And now I'm gonna eat the whole thing all by myself.
And now I'm gonna eat the whole thing all by myself.
Mmm! Thing all by myself.
Mmm! Ca-a-a-a-a-ke.
Mmm! Ca-a-a-a-a-ke.
Want cake.
Ca-a-a-a-a-ke.
Want cake.
Need cake.
Want cake.
Need cake.
Why don't we just go Need cake.
Why don't we just go get some cake? Why don't we just go get some cake? Are you kidding? Get some cake? Are you kidding? Do you know how crazy the cake Are you kidding? Do you know how crazy the cake prices are in this town? Do you know how crazy the cake prices are in this town? Ever since that prices are in this town? Ever since that bakery cartel moved in, they've Ever since that bakery cartel moved in, they've kept the prices up and the bakery cartel moved in, they've kept the prices up and the supply down.
Kept the prices up and the supply down.
Darn bakers! Supply down.
Darn bakers! Fellow Americans, does this Darn bakers! Fellow Americans, does this ever happen to you? Fellow Americans, does this ever happen to you? It's Susan's birthday, ever happen to you? It's Susan's birthday, everyone.
It's Susan's birthday, everyone.
Come on, let's sing.
Everyone.
Come on, let's sing.
Hap Come on, let's sing.
Hap aaaaaaaah! Hap aaaaaaaah! Are you sick to death of this aaaaaaaah! Are you sick to death of this tried old birthday song? Are you sick to death of this tried old birthday song? Yes, I am! Tried old birthday song? Yes, I am! Well, boy, howdy, so am I! Yes, I am! Well, boy, howdy, so am I! Hi, it's me farmer Jimmy, well, boy, howdy, so am I! Hi, it's me farmer Jimmy, part-time Turkey farmer and hi, it's me farmer Jimmy, part-time Turkey farmer and social advocate, but you already part-time Turkey farmer and social advocate, but you already knew that.
Social advocate, but you already knew that.
But what you may not know is knew that.
But what you may not know is that old birthday song offends but what you may not know is that old birthday song offends my musical sensibilities so that old birthday song offends my musical sensibilities so deeply, I barely have words to my musical sensibilities so deeply, I barely have words to describe it.
Deeply, I barely have words to describe it.
That's why I'm holding a contest describe it.
That's why I'm holding a contest to write a new birthday song.
That's why I'm holding a contest to write a new birthday song.
Not only will the winner create to write a new birthday song.
Not only will the winner create history by finally overthrowing not only will the winner create history by finally overthrowing "happy birthday," but you also history by finally overthrowing "happy birthday," but you also get a year's supply of our "happy birthday," but you also get a year's supply of our farm-fresh birthday cakes! Birthday cakes are not actually farm fresh.
Actually farm fresh.
I'll see you at the farm I'll see you at the farm not singing that song, but your new one! Not singing that song, but your new one! Dude, a year's new one! Dude, a year's supply of cake? Dude, a year's supply of cake? We got to write the next supply of cake? We got to write the next "happy birthday" song.
We got to write the next "happy birthday" song.
"Happy birthday" song.
Can we get the next three days Can we get the next three days off from work? Can we get the next three days off from work? Um, no.
Off from work? Um, no.
But, Benson, we have Um, no.
But, Benson, we have to go compete in a birthday song But, Benson, we have to go compete in a birthday song contest.
To go compete in a birthday song contest.
If we don't write a song to contest.
If we don't write a song to replace "happy birthday" If we don't write a song to replace "happy birthday" Wait, the song that replace "happy birthday" Wait, the song that wins this contest will replace Wait, the song that wins this contest will replace "happy birthday"? Wins this contest will replace "happy birthday"? You can go to the contest.
"Happy birthday"? You can go to the contest.
Nice! You can go to the contest.
Nice! I'm counting on you Nice! I'm counting on you guys to put that I'm counting on you guys to put that "happy birthday" song in its guys to put that "happy birthday" song in its grave.
"Happy birthday" song in its grave.
I can't I just Hey, muscle man.
Three.
Three.
Will you listen to three.
Will you listen to our new birthday song and tell Will you listen to our new birthday song and tell us what you think? Our new birthday song and tell us what you think? Por supuesto, us what you think? Por supuesto, bro.
Por supuesto, bro.
Okay, so, this is bro.
Okay, so, this is the first thing we came up with, Okay, so, this is the first thing we came up with, so it may be a little rough the first thing we came up with, so it may be a little rough still.
So it may be a little rough still.
Unnecessary still.
Unnecessary information noted.
Unnecessary information noted.
Ready? - Information noted.
- Ready? Ready? Okay, one that sound was my Okay, one that sound was my new leather workout boots Okay, one that sound was my new leather workout boots still breakin' 'em in.
New leather workout boots still breakin' 'em in.
And, two that song Still breakin' 'em in.
And, two that song I've never heard anything more and, two that song I've never heard anything more beautiful.
I can't believe we nailed the new song on the first try.
Nailed the new song on the first try.
I can believe it.
Try.
I can believe it.
We've been totally nailing life I can believe it.
We've been totally nailing life recently.
We've been totally nailing life recently.
So, how far away is recently.
So, how far away is this farm exactly? So, how far away is this farm exactly? Looks like it's this farm exactly? Looks like it's gonna take us all night.
Looks like it's gonna take us all night.
I'm getting hungry! Gonna take us all night.
I'm getting hungry! There should be a diner I'm getting hungry! There should be a diner coming up.
There should be a diner coming up.
We could stop there.
Coming up.
We could stop there.
All right.
We could stop there.
All right.
All right.
Pie.
Pie.
Pie.
Pie.
Ca-a-a-a-a-ke! Pie.
Pie.
Ca-a-a-a-a-ke! 50 bucks a slice?! Ca-a-a-a-a-ke! 50 bucks a slice?! Quit your gaspin'.
50 bucks a slice?! Quit your gaspin'.
It's a fair price.
Quit your gaspin'.
It's a fair price.
No dessert? It's a fair price.
No dessert? No thanks to No dessert? No thanks to the cake cartel.
No thanks to the cake cartel.
I can't decide the cake cartel.
I can't decide between "sherbet" or "sherbert.
" I can't decide between "sherbet" or "sherbert.
" Between "sherbet" or "sherbert.
" it's your birthday, it's your birthday, birthday it's your birthday, birthday happy, happy birthday Birthday happy, happy birthday aaah! Make it stop! Happy, happy birthday aaah! Make it stop! But it's your birthday, aaah! Make it stop! But it's your birthday, sweetie.
But it's your birthday, sweetie.
I don't want it to be my sweetie.
I don't want it to be my birthday if they're gonna sing I don't want it to be my birthday if they're gonna sing that song.
Birthday if they're gonna sing that song.
Aaah! That song.
Aaah! Can't somebody do something? Aaah! Can't somebody do something? Happy, happy birthday Can't somebody do something? happy, happy birthday That poor kid.
Happy, happy birthday That poor kid.
Ohh! That poor kid.
Ohh! Are all birthday songs terrible? Ohh! Are all birthday songs terrible? Dude.
Are all birthday songs terrible? Dude.
Birthday, birthday Dude.
birthday, birthday happy, happy birthday, birthday, birthday happy, happy birthday, birthday happy, happy birthday, birthday Holster them hand birthday Holster them hand claps, bro.
Holster them hand claps, bro.
Claps, bro.
That song was so cool.
That song was so cool.
Did you guys write that? That song was so cool.
Did you guys write that? Yeah, we're did you guys write that? Yeah, we're entering it in this birthday Yeah, we're entering it in this birthday song contest thing.
Entering it in this birthday song contest thing.
Yes? What?! A contest?! Yes? What?! A contest?! No, no, no.
What?! A contest?! No, no, no.
Thank you for letting me know.
Huh? Huh? We made it! Huh? We made it! Well, this is quite a we made it! Well, this is quite a turnout.
Well, this is quite a turnout.
Welcome all to the first Turnout.
Welcome all to the first and last farmer Jimmy welcome all to the first and last farmer Jimmy birthday song competition! And last farmer Jimmy birthday song competition! - Birthday song competition! - Are you folks ready for a new Are you folks ready for a new birthday song Are you folks ready for a new birthday song - Birthday song - A song to replace the most A song to replace the most overused song of all time, one a song to replace the most overused song of all time, one that takes a beautiful day of overused song of all time, one that takes a beautiful day of celebration and turns it into that takes a beautiful day of celebration and turns it into the worst day of your life?! Celebration and turns it into the worst day of your life?! Ohh.
The worst day of your life?! Ohh.
Yeah.
Ohh.
Yeah.
Good, then! Yeah.
Good, then! Each of our contestants will good, then! Each of our contestants will perform a new birthday song, and each of our contestants will perform a new birthday song, and our judges will rate them perform a new birthday song, and our judges will rate them 1 through 10, with a highest our judges will rate them 1 through 10, with a highest possible total of 30 lit 1 through 10, with a highest possible total of 30 lit candles to clarify 30 candles good.
Zero candles bad.
And there are no trick candles.
Zero candles bad.
And there are no trick candles.
I've checked.
And there are no trick candles.
I've checked.
In conclusion, the contestant I've checked.
In conclusion, the contestant with the best score will receive in conclusion, the contestant with the best score will receive a year's supply of farm fresh with the best score will receive a year's supply of farm fresh cakes.
A year's supply of farm fresh cakes.
May the best new birthday song cakes.
May the best new birthday song win! May the best new birthday song win! Win! It's nice to enjoy it's nice to enjoy the presence of your friends it's nice to enjoy the presence of your friends nice to enjoy sweet treats The presence of your friends nice to enjoy sweet treats baked a real fine cake nice to enjoy sweet treats baked a real fine cake it's gonna make you shake baked a real fine cake it's gonna make you shake baked a real It's gonna make you shake baked a real as we melt away baked a real as we melt away by candlelight as we melt away by candlelight By candlelight and have a and have a ha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ppy And have a ha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ppy so I can sing you ha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ppy so I can sing you a little song so I can sing you a little song 'bout the day a little song 'bout the day you came out of your mom 'bout the day you came out of your mom mom, get off the stage! You came out of your mom mom, get off the stage! presents are comin' Mom, get off the stage! presents are comin' b-b-b-b-b-better roll up presents are comin' b-b-b-b-b-better roll up your sleeves, sleeves, sleeves b-b-b-b-b-better roll up your sleeves, sleeves, sleeves s-s-s-s Your sleeves, sleeves, sleeves s-s-s-s ha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ppy s-s-s-s ha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ppy b-i-i-irthday ha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ppy b-i-i-irthday oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh B-I-i-irthday oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh Oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh and just when you think you're and just when you think you're safe and just when you think you're safe it's your birthday again safe it's your birthday again and again and again and again it's your birthday again and again and again and again Aw.
And again and again and again Aw.
And again Aw.
and again party hard and again party hard Party hard 28 now, that was a good 28 now, that was a good birthday.
Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm! Birthday.
Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm! That's a tough number to beat, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm! That's a tough number to beat, and only one song left in our that's a tough number to beat, and only one song left in our competition.
And only one song left in our competition.
Please welcome last year's competition.
Please welcome last year's Thanksgiving song winners, please welcome last year's Thanksgiving song winners, mordecai and rigby! Thanksgiving song winners, mordecai and rigby! Whoo! - Mordecai and rigby! - Whoo! - Whoo! - Well, this is just Well, this is just our little version of Well, this is just our little version of "happy birthday.
" Our little version of "happy birthday.
" "Happy birthday.
" Oh, no! No, no! Oh, I'm sorry.
Did somebody say my name? Happy birthday himself.
Did somebody say my name? Happy birthday himself.
The guest of honor is here! - Happy birthday himself.
- The guest of honor is here! - The guest of honor is here! - Oh, quite the party.
Oh, quite the party.
- Oh, quite the party.
- I've had better.
I've had better.
Hey, stop that! I've had better.
Hey, stop that! Stop what? Hey, stop that! Stop what? Happy birthday, you stop what? Happy birthday, you scoundrel, you're ruining the happy birthday, you scoundrel, you're ruining the contest! Scoundrel, you're ruining the contest! Get off of my stage! Contest! Get off of my stage! Or what you're not gonna get off of my stage! Or what you're not gonna invite me to your birthday or what you're not gonna invite me to your birthday party? Invite me to your birthday party? - Party? - Ohh! Ohh! Ohh! Dude, we were just Dude, we were just about to sing our song.
Dude, we were just about to sing our song.
Yeah, what you just about to sing our song.
Yeah, what you just did was not cool.
Yeah, what you just did was not cool.
Oh, you want to know what's did was not cool.
Oh, you want to know what's not cool? Oh, you want to know what's not cool? Writing a new birthday song is not cool? Writing a new birthday song is what's not cool.
Writing a new birthday song is what's not cool.
America loves "happy birthday.
" What's not cool.
America loves "happy birthday.
" You love "happy birthday," America loves "happy birthday.
" You love "happy birthday," mordecai and rigby.
You love "happy birthday," mordecai and rigby.
That's not true! Mordecai and rigby.
That's not true! "Happy birthday" is a tried, old That's not true! "Happy birthday" is a tried, old song, and the people want "happy birthday" is a tried, old song, and the people want something new.
Song, and the people want something new.
Isn't that right, America? - Something new.
- Isn't that right, America? - Isn't that right, America? - Yeah! Yeah! Shut your cakehole, America! Yeah! Shut your cakehole, America! You'll never win the birthday shut your cakehole, America! You'll never win the birthday song contest when you're up you'll never win the birthday song contest when you're up against happy birthday! Song contest when you're up against happy birthday! ha-a-a-p Py birthday against happy birthday! ha-a-a-p Py birthday to you ha-a-a-p Py birthday to you no! No! To you no! No! happy birthday to you No! No! happy birthday to you happy birthday, happy birthday to you happy birthday, dear everyone! Happy birthday, dear everyone! Dear everyone! Happy birthday to you happy birthday to you So, what does that Happy birthday to you So, what does that ah! So, what does that ah! Happy birthday ah! happy birthday to you happy birthday to you yes! - To you yes! - happy birthday Yes! happy birthday yeah, happy birthday! Happy birthday yeah, happy birthday! To you Yeah, happy birthday! To you to you! To you to you! Happy birthday, to you! happy birthday, dear happy birthday, dear Bob Dear Bob Austin Bob Austin that's right say their Austin that's right say their names! That's right say their names! Happy birthday names! happy birthday to you happy birthday to you To you You'll never overthrow my song! You'll never overthrow my song! There'll be no birthdays without you'll never overthrow my song! There'll be no birthdays without it! There'll be no birthdays without it! - It! - Then all is lost.
Then all is lost.
I guess you can't solve every then all is lost.
I guess you can't solve every problem with an overly I guess you can't solve every problem with an overly complicated farm-themed song problem with an overly complicated farm-themed song contest.
Complicated farm-themed song contest.
Guess I'll have to throw away contest.
Guess I'll have to throw away that year's supply of cake, but guess I'll have to throw away that year's supply of cake, but you already knew that.
That year's supply of cake, but you already knew that.
Wait! Whoa, whoa, whoa! You already knew that.
Wait! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Give us the chance whoa, whoa, whoa! Give us the chance to sing our song.
Give us the chance to sing our song.
Goodbye! Thanks for coming! - To sing our song.
- Goodbye! Thanks for coming! - Goodbye! Thanks for coming! - today's gonna be a-okay today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, c.
J.
Your birthday happy birthday, c.
J.
celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, c.
J.
celebratin' your birthday what are you doing?! Celebratin' your birthday what are you doing?! today's gonna be what are you doing?! Today's gonna be a-okay today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday happy birthday Your birthday happy birthday Randall happy birthday Randall celebratin' Randall celebratin' your birthday celebratin' your birthday that sounds simple and fresh.
Your birthday that sounds simple and fresh.
Hey, that's pretty catchy.
That sounds simple and fresh.
Hey, that's pretty catchy.
today's gonna be hey, that's pretty catchy.
Today's gonna be a-okay today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' A-okay 'cause we're celebratin' no, stop it! 'Cause we're celebratin' no, stop it! Your birthday No, stop it! Your birthday happy birthday, everyone Your birthday happy birthday, everyone celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone celebratin' your birthday today's gonna be a-okay celebratin' your birthday today's gonna be a-okay Today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone Celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone happy birthday to you happy birthday, everyone happy birthday to you come on! Happy birthday to you come on! Celebratin' your come on! celebratin' your birthday celebratin' your birthday aah! Birthday aah! happy birthday to Aah! happy birthday to get off of my stage! Happy birthday to get off of my stage! we're celebratin' get off of my stage! we're celebratin' your birthday we're celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone Your birthday happy birthday, everyone Happy birthday, everyone celebratin' your birthday celebratin' your birthday today's gonna be a-okay celebratin' your birthday today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone Your birthday happy birthday, everyone celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone celebratin' your birthday today's gonna be a-okay celebratin' your birthday today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' today's gonna be a-okay 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday 'cause we're celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone Your birthday happy birthday, everyone celebratin' your birthday happy birthday, everyone celebratin' your birthday Celebratin' your birthday 30 candles a perfect 30 candles a perfect score! 30 candles a perfect score! Mordecai and rigby are the score! Mordecai and rigby are the winners! Mordecai and rigby are the winners! - Winners! - Fine.
Who needs you, anyways? Fine.
Who needs you, anyways? You see how you like the fine.
Who needs you, anyways? You see how you like the limelight, the collecting of all you see how you like the limelight, the collecting of all those royalties.
Limelight, the collecting of all those royalties.
And just wait until people start those royalties.
And just wait until people start getting sick of your song And just wait until people start getting sick of your song then you'll see how it feels! Getting sick of your song then you'll see how it feels! And then you'll all come then you'll see how it feels! And then you'll all come crawling back, back to and then you'll all come crawling back, back to good 'ol happy birthday! Crawling back, back to good 'ol happy birthday! - Good 'ol happy birthday! - Later, losers! Later, losers! Later, losers! Later, losers! Later, losers! Wow! Great job, guys! Later, losers! Wow! Great job, guys! Yeah, you wiped the Wow! Great job, guys! Yeah, you wiped the floor with that creepy cake.
Yeah, you wiped the floor with that creepy cake.
It was nothing.
Floor with that creepy cake.
It was nothing.
No biggie.
It was nothing.
No biggie.
Well, congratulations, boys.
No biggie.
Well, congratulations, boys.
You certainly earned that year's well, congratulations, boys.
You certainly earned that year's supply of cakes.
You certainly earned that year's supply of cakes.
Ye-e-ah! Supply of cakes.
Ye-e-ah! You'll have to go over some Ye-e-ah! You'll have to go over some details with my lawyer, but you you'll have to go over some details with my lawyer, but you already knew that.
Details with my lawyer, but you already knew that.
- Already knew that.
- Just sign here to claim your Just sign here to claim your cake and acknowledge that your just sign here to claim your cake and acknowledge that your song will probably never replace cake and acknowledge that your song will probably never replace the original "happy birthday" song will probably never replace the original "happy birthday" song.
The original "happy birthday" song.
Bring in the lump sum! Song.
Bring in the lump sum! Lump sum? Bring in the lump sum! Lump sum? Lump sum? Well, you guys wanted Well, you guys wanted cake.
Well, you guys wanted cake.
Cake.
Free cake!
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