Remington Steele (1982) s02e21 Episode Script

Hounded Steele

Where's Mildred? Cheese it! What could be so important about a dog that somebody would kidnap it, then shoot to keep it? - What does he want? - TheJennings Diamond.
If I don't get it to him by 10:00, he'll kill Mildred.
Once more into the breach! What do you say to that, eh? - Put it back.
- Huh? It's a setup.
"Sleepy Rest," huh? It looks about as restful as a split lip.
- Okay, lady.
- You wait for me, amigo.
- Capisce? - Okay, lady.
Shh! Ow! Ooh! Ow.
! Oh, good! Okay.
Okay, sweetheart, we got you.
Goody, goody.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Okay, here we go.
Cheese it! I told you to wait! I'll have your green card for this! Ah, morning, Mildred! Newspaper.
Laura! - No, I'm afraid I can't help you with that either.
- Laura.
! Sir-Sir, I don't know whether the steno pads we ordered are canary yellow or wintermint green.
Look, you'll just have to call back later about all this.
Yes, well, I'm sorry! Good-bye! - Have you tried this? - I made it.
I don't have to drink it.
It's like a hot cup of the Thames.
Where's Mildred? - Question of the hour.
- The newspaper wasn't on my desk.
The coffee is toxic.
My morning calm has been shattered- utterly shattered.
Bear up, Mr.
This is the first time Mildred has been late.
I'm sure she'll be here soon to restore order to our universe.
Shh, shh, shh.
Wait, wait, wait.
No answer from her apartment.
She must be on her way.
- You see? - Yoo-hoo.
! Anybody home? - Oh.
I have a 9:00 with Mr.
- Oh.
- Uh, Mrs.
Claireborne? - That's right.
I'm Laura Holt, Mr.
Steele's associate.
You remember, Mr.
Claireborne is the lady who asked us to locate her former classmates for a reunion.
Elmhurst Finishing School, Class of'47.
Oh, yes, of course.
Delighted, Mrs.
- I have you down for 10:00.
- Yes, I know.
I changed it on Friday.
Surely, your secretary told you? We've had a bit of a mix-up this morning.
Would you mind taking a seat out here for a few minutes? Uh, I'm looking for a Mildred Krebs.
Who isn't? Hello? Remington Steele Investigations.
- Where do you want it, ma'am? - I don't know.
No, I was talking to somebody else.
What were you saying? Tell me, Mrs.
Claireborne, would an accomplished woman like yourself know how to make a potable cup of coffee? Oh, well, I sometimes make it on Maria's day off.
My husband doesn't complain too much.
Is that what you mean? Mm-hmm.
Follow me.
This way.
Call back this afternoon and ask for a Mildred Krebs.
K-R-E-B- B-S.
This afternoon.
I don't know anything about it.
Thank you.
- Planning a nursery, are we? - What else can go wrong this morning? - Come on, girls.
This is it.
- You had to ask, didn't you? - Is Mildred Krebs in? - Not yet.
May we help you? - We're the Dragon Ladies.
- Oh.
- Mildred's bowling team.
- Of course.
That's Hazel, Esther, and I'm Rose.
- Hi.
- Uh-huh.
And what do you want? Plant lady.
Monday and Thursday.
Oh, right.
Go ahead.
What can we do for you ladies, huh? - We're looking for Mildred.
- She missed practice last night.
She's never done that before, and semifinals are tonight.
I tried reaching her until midnight, but no luck so we thought she might be off on another hush-hush assignment.
- Mildred? - I told you, girls.
They can't talk about it.
- Talk about what? - It's okay, honey.
We understand.
Mildred's told us the kind of work that she does.
The intrigue, the danger.
I didn't think you could talk about it if your top op was on a case.
Top op? - Mr.
- Would you excuse us for a moment, ladies? Regardless of whatever tall stories Mildred had been spinning, I'm worried.
That isn't like her at all, is it? - E-Excuse me.
- Oh, sorry.
I have a key Mildred gave me to her apartment in case of an emergency.
I suggest we use it.
- Excuse me.
- Sorry.
Uh- I'll- Ah, ladies, I don't think Miss Krebs is in any sort of trouble but Miss Holt and I are gonna make sure.
If you would like to check back later- - We can wait.
- She's the rock of our team.
We don't stand a chance without her tonight.
- Suit yourselves.
- Here you are, Mr.
Ah, Mrs.
Claireborne, would you be an angel and watch the phones for a moment? - Miss Holt and I will be right back.
- Oh, yes, I suppose so.
You're a godsend.
Uh- - Yes? - Who is this? Susan Claireborne.
Who is this? - Yes? - I'm calling Remington Steele Investigations.
This is Remington Steele Investigations.
Susan Claireborne speaking.
Forty-five minutes late and already they replaced me? - Pardon? - Put Mr.
Steele on the phone.
- I'm afraid Mr.
Steele isn't here.
- Then give me Miss Holt.
She's not here either.
You'll have to speak up.
Hello? Hello? Hello? Young people today.
The bed's made.
Everything's neat as a pin.
- No question where Mildred feeds her overactive imagination.
- Oh! Have a look at this.
Besides us, it seems the Dragon Ladies are all she has.
I never really thought about what Mildred does outside the office.
Neither have I.
It must get pretty lonely for her.
Divorced, no children.
Just a sister living in Seattle.
Makes it easy to understand why she might exaggerate to her friends.
- Add a little color to her life.
- And theirs too, obviously.
Oh, I hope nothing's happen- Ah, Mr.
Steele, Miss Holt, this is Kevin Masters.
- Hello.
- How do you do? I'm just here to get my dog.
- Excuse me? - You must be Shirley's friend.
- That's right.
- Who's Shirley? There he is! Good boy! Yeah! - Good boy.
! - Mildred! Mr.
Steele, Miss Holt, I'm sorry I'm late.
Oh! Oh! This man was shooting, and I couldn't get away.
Rest, Mildred.
- We'll talk later.
- Okay.
- How is she? - Fine.
She just needs some rest.
He must like you, Mr.
Bad dog.
I'm sorry, Mr.
I guess he's just excited by all the attention.
Perfectly understandable.
Masters, do you think you could fill us in on just what you and your dog are doing here? Oh, I can explain.
Shirley gave me a jingle so I rang up Mildred, and Mildred buzzed Shirley.
- Who's Shirley? - I am.
Shirley Mellish is the name.
Aw, look it.
! There's a good fella.
! Hello, Mr.
I see you made it all right.
- You Steele? - Me Steele.
Miss Mellish, do you think we might have a word with you? Sure.
Oh, boy.
- Straight through.
Do sit down, please.
- Thank you.
In matters of this nature, I find it advisable for subjects to focus on the initial stages of their narrative and then to proceed chronologically.
- What'd he say? - He means start at the beginning.
Ah, gotcha.
Masters drops off his pooch on Sunday, like always.
I groom dogs, see? I wash 'em, clip 'em, whatever they need.
I take care of his dog, and I put him out in the back, when I hear something.
I run out, and there's this guy making off with the dog.
So I chase the creep, but he hops in his car and drives off.
Not being a dimwit, I copied down the license plate number.
- But now I have a problem.
- Why didn't you simply call the police? See, I run the business out of my home for the last 15 years now.
You know, nice and simple, no formalities.
- And no business license.
- On the nose, honey.
So I don't think the boys in blue would take too kindly to that.
I think you're right.
But why did you call Mildred? I didn't call her.
I called Hazel.
Hazel called Mildred.
Mildred called me.
- Right.
Go on.
- So Mildred says no problem.
She'll have the dog back at noon today.
And so she does.
End of story.
- Thank you, Mrs.
- Sure.
It isn't enough that I have to cover for you as a detective.
Now I have Mildred to worry about.
I suppose we ought to have a little chat with her about misrepresentation.
Why don't you talk to her about it, being an expert in the subject? Come, now.
Calm down.
After all, she did get the dog back.
You're missing the point.
Obviously, she used my confidential sources to trace that license plate.
Personally, I find that offensive, and professionally, it's fraudulent.
Real detectives lose their licenses for things like that.
Perhaps you're missing the point.
Regardless of any improprieties, it appears that Mildred has had a harrowing time and for reasons which are presently obscure at best.
You're right.
First things first.
What could be so important about a dog that somebody would kidnap it, then shoot to keep it? Come here, fella! Come on! Laura, let's not be hasty.
I'm Kevin Masters.
It was my dog you recovered.
I just heard the whole story, and, well, I wanted to say thank you.
Oh, it was nothing.
Well, I'd better let you get back to sleep.
No, that's okay.
You can keep me up a little longer.
I thought you got along with dogs.
I do.
Dogs love me.
I love dogs.
That is obviously not a dog.
It's some other animal masquerading as a dog.
I see.
Wait a minute.
Look at this.
Am I imagining things, or are these real diamonds? Well, they do appear to be authentic enough.
Excuse me.
There's a gentleman here to see you.
Tell him to wait outside.
We're very busy.
The gentleman is very insistent.
In fact, he has a gun! Give me that.
Not that.
! That! Hey, that's my dog! Ooh! - Ooh! - Aah! Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
Eleven flights, Laura.
You're right.
He'll be in Poughkeepsie by the time we get down the stairs.
- Are you okay? - Are you all right? Grooming charges are on the house this week, Mr.
- Did you catch him? - No.
May we have a word with you, Mr.
Masters? Through here.
Excuse me.
This one's taken.
Would you mind telling me what makes your dog so popular? I don't know.
I'm as baffled as you are.
Come, now.
Dognappings at gunpoint are hardly an everyday occurrence, even in Los Angeles.
- What about this, Mr.
Masters? - His collar.
What are real diamonds doing on a dog collar, Mr.
Masters? That dog is all I have in the world.
He and I go back a long way.
I, uh- I don't have anyone to spoil, so I'm afraid I spoil him.
But why would somebody take the dog and not the collar? I don't know, but I'll pay you anything to get him back.
Take the collar as collateral.
That won't be necessary.
We'll see what we can do, Mr.
So I took buses, cabs, anything to get away from the man.
I have been to places in the last 24 hours that I never knew existed- West Covina, Azusa.
- Do you know there's a place called City of Industry? - Go on, Mildred.
- There's not much more to tell.
I thought I finally gave him the slip, but I guess not.
Perhaps we'd better start at the place where you found the dog.
The address is in my purse.
I called your friend Alan at the D.
to trace the car and it was a rental from Johnson Leasing.
So I called them and got a local address.
- You're not mad at me, are you? - We'll talk about it later.
For the moment, we're just glad you're all right, okay? I didn't think it would turn out like this.
When Hazel called, it seemed so minor.
A stolen dog, for crying out loud.
And, well, I'd been telling them all for a while now that, uh- that I'm more than a secretary.
- I couldn't say no.
- But you're very important to us as you are, Mildred.
Perhaps you haven't realized this, but you're very much appreciated around here, really.
Well, maybe.
But you two you're so young.
You're admired.
Your lives are important.
And I don't even pretend to understand your relationship.
But you do seem to have each other.
And, sometimes, well- Sometimes it's hard for me.
I'm just an old bureaucrat with a busted marriage and fading memories.
- Mildred.
- Come on.
Come- Here you go, Mildred.
Come here.
I mean- Sometimes, I don't know, I- I just wanna feel important too.
Yes! And they've asked me to stay on the rest of the day.
I mean, can you imagine, Carol? Me working? Actually, it's not nearly as unpleasant as I'd always imagined it was.
- Here she is.
- Ah, Miss Krebs, the ladies will see you home now.
Do you want me to make that court appearance for you on the Williamson matter, Miss Krebs? Oh, certainly, Miss Holt and extend my apologies to the judge.
I'vejust reviewed the Rothenberg dossier, Miss Krebs.
First-rate, as always.
Anything else we need to know about in your absence? I think you've been brought up to date but keep me advised of any developments in the Masters case.
- You got it.
- And Mr.
Steele? Don't you think we should do something about these plants? - Right away.
- Good.
- Come on, girls.
Let's take the limo.
- Good-bye.
- Good-bye.
- Bye-bye.
You know, Laura, I hadn't realized until this moment just how frustrating it must be for you to pretend - that I'm the head of this agency.
- It's about time.
For over a year now, you've had to put up with countless charades and indignities of the sort that I've just experienced for a brief moment and yet found quite demeaning, even at that.
It's truly remarkable the way you've been able to keep your emotions in check while I take the glory for all your efforts.
Truly remarkable, yes.
Keep up the good work.
Number four.
John Smith.
That's not an alias, you suppose? It's the man from Mildred's apartment.
Here we are.
- Oh, my.
- What is it? Jonathan Hemmings, Interpol.
Oh, my! I didn't know you had a dog, Laura.
He belongs to Mr.
Steele just loves dogs.
You say you knew this Hemmings, Lieutenant? Came to the office.
That was about it.
He said he was trying to find a former Interpol man, name of Anatole Blaylock.
Seems this Blaylock is still going around using Interpol credentials and contacts.
Any idea why? - Thanks, Tom.
- Sure.
I'll bet Blaylock is the one we're after.
It would explain what Hemmings was doing at Mildred's apartment.
He saw Blaylock chasing Mildred, picked up on her identity somehow and decided to check her out.
Laura, this case just became extremely interesting.
Several years ago, Interpol put Anatole Blaylock in charge of apprehending a brilliant thief known as "Le Renard.
" - The Fox.
- Mm-hmm.
Blaylock failed utterly, so Interpol had him cashiered out.
Apparently Blaylock became unhinged by it all.
How do you know so much about Blaylock anyway? Mmm.
Because for a while, Interpol thought I was the Fox.
- Were you? - There were times I wished I was.
- Good cookies.
- They'rejust chocolate chip.
- The recipe's on the package.
- But some people put nuts in 'em.
- Right.
- I don't like 'em with nuts.
Me either.
That's why I didn't put them in.
Here I am, prattling on about myself and I don't know anything about you, Kevin.
Not much to tell, Mildred.
I'm retired.
Nowadays, I mostly take walks with my faithful companion.
- Your wife? - My dog.
Oh! I love the little guy.
! Milly, it's us.
! Well, I should be going.
Oh, uh- Maybe I'll drop around tomorrow, if you'll be around, that is.
I'll be here.
Good day, ladies.
He's just a friend.
! Stay! When I say "Stay," you bloody well stay, damn it! - Wonderful technique.
- I'm close to a breakthrough.
I can sense it.
Ah! Laura, observe.
Sit! Sit- Stand! Stand.
Walkies! Walkies! - Mr.
Steele- - Huh? It sickens me to think that you and Old Yeller are members of the same animal family.
Get! - These scrapbooks are amazing.
- Mm-hmm.
- Sort of a catalog of classic burglaries in our time.
- Mm-hmm.
Some children collect comic books.
Others collect baseball cards.
You collected larcenies.
There's quite a lot here about le Renard.
Gentleman thief.
Only stole from the very rich.
Never used weapons, never caught.
- He dropped out of sight several years ago.
- Here you go.
This is the collar that was around the dog.
- You mean, Kevin Masters? - Le Renard? I don't believe it.
We have a master criminal for a client.
Makes for a nice change of pace, eh? Let's be serious for a moment.
Some of these articles mention an alleged accomplice, Doolittle.
He was never identified either.
Irish, isn't it? Doolittle? - I suppose so.
- Listen.
Will you be quiet, please! - I'm trying to listen.
- No, don't you see? Doolittle.
! Doolittle.
I would have thought a master thief would have grander digs.
You found him! Come in, come in! Well, hello there, boy! How are you? - Doolittle's a good dog, isn't he? - Yes, he's a fine- - Did I tell you his name? - You know I'm told that one of the great frustrations of being a master criminal is the inability to take credit for one's own craft.
Take, uh, Le Renard, for instance who pulled off such remarkablejobs as the Macedonian Chalice the Hapsburg Triptych, the Panther's Eye Ruby of Simba.
What restraint he must have not to throw open the shutters to the world and shout, "I did it!" You must love that dog an awful lot to give him a collar that could put you away, Mr.
Does Miss Krebs know? Please, come on in.
Sit down.
Well, what's this all about? Um, Anatole Blaylock.
- Blaylock? - Mm-hmm.
Cruel chap.
But not too quick, thank God.
I thought he quit searching for me years ago.
Why are you looking at me like that, Miss Holt? I'm finding it hard to believe that you're a famous cat burglar.
Dog burglar, actually.
I never cared for cats.
They're haughty creatures.
But Doolittle here and his forebearers, they've been a great help to me.
Haven't you? You mustn't judge me too harshly, Miss Holt.
I'm a man whose talents put him outside the law.
Actually, I learned my trade working for Uncle Sam during the war- undercover operations in Europe.
When the war was over, I stayed on in England.
- What happened to all the money? - You mean this? I spent it when I had it.
No regrets.
This place suits me fine.
Nice neighborhood, pretty quiet.
Gardening's my hobby now.
Must be the English influence.
You Brits really love your gardens, don't you? Well, I, uh- I guess you have to turn me in now, right? For what? Hmm? The statute of limitations on the Kronenbourg Necklace ran out years ago.
I don't see any evidence of wrongdoing in our bailiwick.
- That's mighty nice of you.
- Let's just say I have a soft spot for charming men with mysterious pasts.
- But we do have a problem to solve.
- Blaylock.
What do you think he wanted with Doolittle? I don't know.
But whatever he's after I don't think he'll stop now.
You are going to make a little call for me, Miss Krebs.
What makes you think I'll do that, Blaylock? Hello, Mildred? Are you- Yes, I get the point, Blaylock.
- 10:00.
- He has Mildred.
- What does he want? - TheJennings Diamond.
If I don't get it to him by 10:00, he'll kill Mildred.
So that's what he's after, eh? He wants you to steal for him.
And he was using Doolittle as leverage, but now he has Mildred instead.
He must've tailed me, seen I'd taken a liking to her.
- Mmm.
How does she sound? - Scared.
We'd better call the police.
Blaylock's already killed once today.
I believe he'll do it again if provoked.
Well, I better get ready to come out of retirement.
With all due respect, not even you can pull this one off.
Even if you do get into the Gem Exchange Building the diamond's in a case with a unique alarm system.
Disturb the glass in any way, and you set the bloody thing off.
- I don't have much choice, do I? - But it's impossible.
I know for a fact it isn't.
I may not have the tools anymore, folks but a retiree's got to keep his mind active.
See, I spend months working up a tough heist- all in my head, of course- and when I've solved it, I move on to another.
TheJennings Diamond was one of my assignments.
- Fantastic.
- I'll need some help though.
Well, it would be an honor to assist someone as gifted as, uh, Le Renard.
Come on.
Okay, boy, we're back in business.
Here, you take him.
By the way, what are we going to do after we steal the diamond? Well, he'll cleverly trap Blaylock into a web of his own devising.
Any idea how? One thing at a time, Laura.
One thing at a time, please.
Come on.
Once more into the breach! - Are you all right? - Fine.
A little grease on my glove.
That's all.
May I? A bit chilly.
Pull out 142.
Punch up 765.
Put this in.
They must be well into it by now.
What gives you the right to make another man steal for you? What gives me the right? That man destroyed my life.
Do you know what it's like to have your name dragged through the mud? To have your colleagues shun you? To be the butt of newspaper reporters and their stupid little columns? Huh? I was a good investigator.
I deserve better.
- But- - Shh! Yes, Sergeant? This is Inspector Anatole Blaylock of Interpol.
It might interest you to know I've uncovered a plot to steal theJennings Diamond tonight.
That's right.
The Gem Exchange Building.
I thought your department might want to share credit.
- I'll meet you there.
- I thought you wanted Kevin to steal for you.
Do you think money can pay for the humiliation I've suffered? No.
Tonight, when I announce to the world that Blaylock, the bumbler, the scapegoat has unmasked the greatest thief of our time- caught him in the act, as it were- I shall have what I've lived for these past five years- my vindication.
You'll never make it stick, Blaylock.
- Oh, no? - Oh, no.
Kevin will tell the police you forced him into it.
But he'll need you to back him up.
And you don't think I'll talk? I will sing a song that will put you- On the other hand, what business is it of mine? I mean, I hardly know the guy.
No, I wouldn't talk.
No skin off my nose.
Get your coat.
- Milly, it's us.
! - Don't answer it.
- I have to.
It's my bowling team.
- Get rid of them.
- But- - Unless you want your friends to join you.
- Come on, girl.
- You girls run on ahead without me.
A little emergency came up at the office.
- I'll get there by myself.
- But Mildred- Do me a favor on the way over.
Pick up my bowling ball, would you? It's at the Claremore Shop on Vermont.
- What? - The Claremore Shop? On Vermont.
Get your coat.
- My ankle.
- How bad? Huh? Bad enough to keep me here.
Well, that's it then.
No, it isn't.
Doolittle's all you need from here.
Oh, no.
I'm not taking him without you.
Tell that to Miss Krebs.
Look, I've explained the voice commands.
He'll obey you.
You're in good hands, believe me.
Come on.
Come on, Doolittle.
Come on.
How are we going to get Masters out of here? One thing at a time, Laura.
This way, Doolittle.
Okay, Doolittle, fetch.
- Fetch.
Go on.
- Go on.
Pick it up.
Okay, Doolittle, home.
! Slide.
! - Come on, Doolittle.
Bring it back.
- Come on, Doolittle.
- There's a good boy.
- Come on, sweetheart.
Come on, Doolittle, you bloody twit.
- Swell.
! - Come on.
Come here, Doolittle.
Come on.
- Bring it back! - Walkies! Come on.
You're an inspiration to us all, Mr.
Come here.
Give me your card.
Oh, thank you.
Good boy.
All right.
Diamond 1 to Diamond 2, report.
Diamond 2 to Diamond 1, in position.
Diamond 1 to Diamond 3, report.
Diamond 3 to Diamond 1, in position.
Get up! All right.
We're here- the corner of Claremore and Vermont.
All I see is the Gem Exchange.
Now what? I still don't get it.
It's a clue, Hazel.
Mildred's a top operative.
She wouldn't have sent us here without a reason.
We just have to figure out what it is.
So, what do we do? Reconnoiter, girls.
Diamond One, this is Diamond Three.
We have three female subjects out front- middle-aged, all wearing what appear to be bowling shirts with "Dragon Ladies" written on the back.
Please advise.
Damn! What is Mildred's bowling team doing down there? Sorry.
Can't talk right now.
What do you say to that, eh? - Put it back.
- Huh? It's a setup.
You see, Officer, there isn't any Claremore Shop so we interpreted that to mean the corner of Claremore and Vermont.
- The question is, why- - I'm sure you're right, but some other time.
- You don't understand.
- Take them away.
- Mildred wouldn't have told us that if there wasn't- Now what? - Hey! - Emergency call, sir.
- Hey, what's going on here? - I don't know.
What are you doing here? Some people got locked in the building accidentally.
- An old man got a sprained ankle.
- What? Everybody, up against the wall.
Come on.
Come on.
There's a perfectly good explanation for this.
- Yeah, I'm sure there is.
- Congratulations, Officer.
- You've just arrested a world-famous thief.
- Who are you? - What have you done with Mildred? - Against the wall! If you check that man's pockets, I'm certain you'll find theJennings Diamond.
They're clean, Lieutenant.
- What's this all about? - He has the diamond.
- He must.
! - This is the man you want! He killed an Interpol agent! - Will you listen to me? - Arrest this man! Doolittle, tango! Take him away.
Well, I suppose that dog is good for something, after all.
Uh, Mr.
Steele- - I think it's safe to say the Fox has finally retired.
- Mmm! At least he won't have Blaylock to worry about anymore.
According to the police, his failure snapped him for good.
He just sits in his cell repeating, "Le Renard, Le Renard.
" - How can I ever thank you? - How about picking up my dry-cleaning bill, eh? Hello.
Thought you might need a little more help today.
No way, Jose.
Remington Steele Investigations.
One moment, please.
- Good morning, everyone.
- I thought we might have lunch, Mildred.
Oh, great.
I only get an hour.
Yes? No, I'm afraid that won't do.
When we order canary yellow pads, we expect canary yellow pads.
Let me speak to your supervisor.
I thought you said she was a very important part of this agency.
She is, Mrs.
She is.