Remington Steele (1982) s03e10 Episode Script

Breath of Steele

Da, da, da, da! - I'm Toni.
She's Teri.
- I'm Teri.
She's T- - Who would wanna kill two singing telegram girls? - How do you like that? The guy stiffed us.
- You ever seen this before? - Myron gave one to each of his golden circle.
Find the man who owns this atomizer and I'll show you a man whose breath smells of murder.
Man Chattering, People Laughing] - Surprise.
! - Whoo! Mmm! Whoo-whee! Oh, happy birthday, boss.
Oh, happy birthday, boss.
Oh, thank you, Mildred.
Mildred, I thought we made plans to take Mr.
Steele to dinner.
Well, where I come from, that's called three's a crowd, if you know what I mean.
- But- - Hope you get your wish, chief.
Oh, I'm sure Miss Holt will do everything in her power to see that I do.
Well, in that case, make it a pip.
Ta-ta! - Mildred- - Steady.
Tell me, Laura.
Is this sudden celebration merely an act of capricious folly or has it been steeping for some time, eh? I created you.
Remember, Mr.
Steele? Your birthday is a matter of record.
Mildred came across it while she was updating the files.
Oh, well, you might be interested to know that we have a tradition where I come from.
Really? Where is that exactly? It's quite a grand tradition, really handed down from father to son, from father to son, father to son.
- I get the picture.
What's the point? - The birthday boy gets one wish - but it must be granted by the stroke of midnight.
- Ah.
! Whoo.
! Da, da, da, da, da, da, da-da-da-da.
! Surprise.
! Bravo, girls! Bravo! Not exactly the wish I had in mind, Laura, but we're getting there.
It wasn't my idea.
Somebody doesn't want me to get my wish.
Oh, boy.
Why can you never find a hat when you need one? - A hat? - Here.
Here we go.
What are you doing? A little trick I learned from John Wayne.
Whoo-ee! Yes, well, I'd venture to say it's safe to get up now, Laura.
Steele, this is going to sound crazy but I don't think those shots were meant for us.
Oh? Then who? Just a minute, ladies.
Stay, stay, stay.
- Don't worry.
You don't have to tip us.
- No, no, no.
It's quite possible whoever fired those shots was aiming at you.
- Oh, my God.
- Stay calm.
We're trained investigators, and we're here to help you, Miss, uh- - I'm Toni.
She's Teri.
- I'm Teri.
She's T- It's gonna be a long night.
Who would wanna kill singing telegram girls? - Not just singing telegram girls.
- Actresses.
- Singers.
- Dancers.
- Penny Marshall's gardener said we're the next Laverne and Shirley.
- Penny Marshall's gardener? - Yeah.
We did his birthday.
Penny was supposed to be there, but she didn't show.
Tell me, girls.
Have you any idea who would want to kill you? - Not really.
- Haven't got a clue.
Little Murders.
Elliott Gould, Alan Arkin.
A random sniper picks people off in a New York high-rise building.
Okay, girls.
On your way.
I'm sure our man is scaling another high-rise as we speak.
Are you really going to send these poor, defenseless girls out to face Lord knows what? Merely one of our options, Laura.
Obviously whoever it was followed them here.
Now, where were you tonight? Ah, Mr.
Pleasure to meet you, sir.
Pleasure to meet you indeed.
Milo Minderbinder, Jinglegrams, Incorporated.
I believe two of my young ladies visited you.
- Those two work for you, do they? - Yes, sir, and I was just- wondering- Hello, Mrs.
Two of our girls, Toni and Teri were here tonight, and I'm doing a follow-up to see if their work was satisfactory.
Oh, yeah.
They left something I'd like to return.
It's not too late to salvage the evening, Laura.
I'll live, Mr.
It's only meringue.
Well, we can still catch the opening of the second act.
- Not if the lights go down, of course.
- The girls' calling card.
Well, let's hope Mr.
Flowers is a bit more accommodating.
I don't know how much more of this I can bear.
In this business, Mr.
Steele, you take the lemon with the meringue.
Flowers, I'm with Ji-Ji- Oh, dear me.
Oh, dear, dear, dear, dear.
And on my birthday too.
Congratulations, Laura.
You've managed to embroil us in a real case.
I think it's safe to assume whoever took a shot at Toni and Teri had something to do with Myron Flowers's murder.
- Odd.
- What's odd about it? There was meringue on the door and the wall outside the office.
Yet the only thing on Myron's face was aftershave.
So who did Toni and Teri accost with a pie in the face? Who indeed? - That Myron Flowers? - You know him, Mildred? Doesn't everybody? He's the Colonel Sanders of breath spray.
You said you went to Mr.
Flowers's office around 7:30? - Exactly 7:30.
- And you're sure it was Myron Flowers you surprised? - Positive.
- Little bald fellow about 60? Don't try to fake us, Mr.
The whipped cream was sticking all over his hair.
That I remember.
- Teri, Myron Flowers was bald.
- He was? Yes, and it's quite possible you two threw a pie in his killer's face.
- It is? - Can you describe the man you thought was Myron Flowers? - Like that.
- How old? - Thirty.
- Fifty.
- What color was his hair? - Jet black.
- Light brown.
- Eyes? - Brown.
- Blue.
- Hmm.
- Sounds like you really put the old peepers to him.
One thing is for certain.
He knows what you two look like.
Yes, and I'm afraid he's determined neither one of you will live to identify him.
Does that mean we have to stay cooped up here till you find out who that guy is? I think it's best.
We'll start with the security guard at Flowers Industries.
He oughta know who was in and out of that building tonight.
- But we have a gig tomorrow.
- Yeah.
We're doing Morgan Fairchild's manicurist's daughter's birthday party.
- That's showbiz? - Don't you realize what a great contact Morgan Fairchild's manicurist is? - Yeah.
She tells Morgan how great we are.
- Morgan tells her agent.
- Her agent tells a producer.
- And we've got our own series.
- Oh! - That's showbiz.
Don't worry, girls.
Steele will have this one wrapped up in no time flat, won't you? Mm.
Oh, yes.
With some judicious gumshoeing we should arrive just in time for the curtain call.
Johnson? - Heart attack? - He's the right type.
- Overweight.
- Unkempt and unloved, by the looks of him.
More than likely, he was killed to keep him from identifying Myron Flowers's murderer.
Have a look.
That's the blow that did him in.
If he was murdered, it must've been by somebody he knew.
No sign of forced entry, except for us.
- Handkerchief.
- Hmm? Oh.
Oh, well, I must say, the man had taste.
Appears to be solid gold.
Why would a security guard squander his money on a solid-gold atomizer? Unless it didn't belong to him in the first place.
This could've fallen out of the killer's pocket when he struggled with Johnson.
At least we have something to go on.
There can't be a lot of solid-gold atomizers floating around.
Uh- Yeah! Pick up your feet! Oh, my goodness! What on earth are you- - Come on! That was my favorite part! - Girls, put some clothes on.
- There's a gentleman present.
- Okay, Krebby.
And don't call me Krebby.
The name is Krebs.
And it's Miss Krebs to you.
- Yes, ma'am.
- Right.
Oh, boss, I'm sorry, unleashing these two on you and Miss Holt.
You hired them, Mildred? Never mind.
Your heart was in the right place.
Come on.
Come on.
This is a pigsty.
Let's move it.
Pick it up.
Come on.
All of it.
Rise and shine, Laura.
Rise and shine.
Laura? Laura? Laura, wake up.
There we go.
There's a good girl.
- They didn't get to bed till 5:00 a.
- Oh! - They stayed up all night talking about "the biz.
" - Uh-huh.
You know, it's funny.
Those girls and I are worlds apart and yet I'm not that much older than they are.
- Oh.
- Cool! What's this "dooda"? Aah! That dooda is evidence, before you smudged any meaningful fingerprints off it.
I got it.
No, you don't! Need I remind you this is my home and my phone? Hello? It's for you.
- Hello? Oh, hi, Petula! - Petula? - Uh-huh.
- Our answering service.
You two are guests in my home.
That means my clothes, my closets my dresser drawers and my phone number are strictly off-limits.
- You got it? - We got another gig, Teri.
! Woody Allen's West Coast barber's brother is having a bar mitzvah.
- Woody's sure to be there! - This is it, our big break! - I can feel it in my bones.
- Dibs on the shower! - Mildred! - Yo.
- They don't leave this loft.
- Right.
From here on, Krebs gets tough.
Look at this place.
Let's wrap things up so we can get back to normal.
Grudge? I'll tell you what kind of grudge I had against Myron.
I spent eight years of my life perfecting the formula for Flower Power.
I'm the genius behind it, not him.
He stole it from me, put his name on it and made a fortune.
I empathize with you, Dr.
Flowers working the trenches while a figurehead basks in the limelight.
It's enough to drive anyone to murder.
Certainly you don't think I had anything to do with Myron's death? You certainly had an excellent motive.
Last night was the 10th anniversary of Myron's deceit.
I simply hired Jinglegrams to remind him of it.
I would've gone myself, but I had a class.
Now I wish- I would have loved to have seen his face just one last time.
Well, it appears he robbed you of even that small consolation, Doctor.
Tell me- Have you ever seen this before? Yes.
Myron gave one to each of his golden circle.
- Just who are the golden ones? - Well, there's his second-in-command, Fitts my replacement, Brenda, and my ex-son, Chip.
- Ex-son? - Left me the same day his father did.
As far as I'm concerned, I no longer have a son.
If it's suspects you're after I would say Brenda and Chip are probably worth about $25 million more today than they were yesterday.
Find the man who owns this atomizer and I'll show you a man whose breath smells of murder.
Oh, how I long for the days when our cases truly puzzled me.
Of course, on the other hand, the sooner we solve this case the sooner we'll be able to address ourselves to more pressing matters.
What could possibly be more pressing than nabbing a murderer? Catching the opening act of 42nd Street.
I called the box office this morning.
Best seats in the house.
Mind the road.
I married Eliott, my first husband the Saturday after I graduated from high school.
Myron and I were married less than a month after my divorce from Eliott.
I've never been without a man in my life.
If this is too painful for you, Mrs.
Flowers- No, n-no.
Myron is dead, and nothing I can do will change that.
I just have to stop feeling sorry for myself and get on with the rest of my life, like it or not.
Oh, Chip! Oh.
This is my stepson, Chip, and my husband's personal secretary, Miss Evans.
- Oh, this is Mr.
- - Steele.
- How do you do? - I'm Laura Holt.
They're looking into the circumstances of your father's final journey.
Your father's untimely departure from this world has put two of our clients in a little bit of a, um, predicament.
Someone is trying to kill them.
We think it's the same man who killed your father.
Tell you what.
You guys find whoever did my father in, and I'll take care of the sucker.
Tell me.
Did the late Mr.
Flowers have any enemies? Enemies? Why, Miss Holt Myron was respected and admired by everyone who knew him.
She's incredible, isn't she? Mm.
Tell me.
Weren't you a little bit concerned when he didn't come home last night? Why, no.
I was with Joshua.
- Joshua? - Yes.
My guided imagery instructor.
- Oh.
- It wasn't uncommon for Mr.
Flowers to work in his lab for hours on end.
- He wouldn't even stop to eat.
- Yes.
That was Myron.
Dedicated, self-sacrificing, brilliant.
He'll be with me forever.
Me too.
- Brenda.
- Oh, thank God! Now I can land.
Now I can finally rest my wings at last.
I took the first flight back.
Brenda, I don't know what to say.
It is such a shock.
I mean, I can't believe it myself.
- Myron's really gone? - Gone, Nathan, but not "gone" gone.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Uh, Nathan Fitts, Myron's second-in-command.
- How do you do? Remington Steele.
- Laura Holt.
- They're investigating Dad's death.
- Uh, really? - Lose anything, Mr.
Fitts? - My atomizer.
I seem to have misplaced it.
- Aha.
- Here it is.
- Guess that blows the atomizer theory.
- Mm.
Our suspects not only have their atomizers, but also alibis as well.
Let's hope 42nd Street enjoys a long run.
The way things are going, you may be celebrating your 42nd birthday before we get to see it.
Those girls can identify me, Brenda.
It is only a matter of time before Steele- Brenda, please listen to me.
This is your problem too.
- If Steele gets to me- - I don't wanna hear about it, Nathan.
Do what you have to do.
Only just get us out of this.
All right.
That's it.
That's the last straw.
I don't care if it is a matter of life and death, those girls have worn out their welcome.
- Laura.
- I could strangle them! When I get through with them- - Laura? - What? - Where are they? Oh, oh.
If anything happens to those girls, I'll never forgive myself.
Yes, to say nothing of poor Mildred.
Laura- I, uh- I think you'd better have a look in here.
Oh, Mr.
Steele, it was so humiliating.
- Was it the man you thought was Myron? - He had this blue ski mask and- - Sunglasses! - Sunglasses? - The guy was wearing sunglasses.
- No way, Ray.
Mildred, did you get a good look at him? I'm sorry, Miss Holt.
All I remember is the mask.
Well, the most important thing is that you're all safe.
You'd better get dressed before you catch your death of cold.
Go on.
- Oh, Mr.
Steele? - Yes? You don't think any the less of me, do you, boss? I mean, now that you've seen me- Oh, of course not, Mildred.
Rest assured, I did the gentlemanly thing.
- I averted my eyes.
- Oh, bless you, Mr.
All right, girls.
Brains before beauty.
Why didn't the masked man kill them? And why did he make them take their clothes off? It doesn't make sense.
Unfortunately, sense is the one thing we're sorely lacking in this case.
Unless- Unless he was looking for this.
And what is so important about this thing? It has no distinguishing marks, no monogram.
Speaking of distinguishing marks, did you happen to notice the unique placement of the tattoo on Toni's- It was Teri, and I thought you averted your eyes.
Ah, yes, well, a detective's trained eye can be a nagging problem at times.
- Never a moment's rest.
- I wonder what's in this thing.
- Good Lord.
- Oh! - That could've been you, Mr.
- Or you, Miss Holt.
We've been carrying that thing around for the last 24 hours.
The bloody thing's lethal.
We'll have it analyzed, and we'd better look intoJohnson's autopsy.
I have a feeling a blow to the head wasn't what did him in after all.
Thank you very much.
The atomizer was filled with poison.
For that daisy fresh breath, no doubt.
- Ah, Mildred, how are our charges holding up? - They're in Miss Holt's office trying to convince Morgan Fairchild's manicurist to postpone her daughter's celebration until tomorrow afternoon.
- Hmm.
- Here's theJohnson autopsy report.
Thank you, Mildred.
I was right.
Johnson was poisoned by a mixture of ingredients found in most laboratories.
Which makes this little gem a murder weapon.
Yes, but whose is it? Chip, Brenda and Nathan Fitts still have their atomizers.
Therefore, it obviously belongs to Myron Flowers.
If he was half as obsessed about his breath as his intimates were then the murderer obviously thought he had a foolproof plan.
And since Myron didn't fall for it, he simply adopted Plan "B" and shot him.
Then used the atomizer to get rid ofJohnson.
Now, if you were the murderer where would you go to get your hands on the ingredients to make the deadly poison? - What are we looking for? - Methoxychlor bishydroxycoumarin hexachlorocyclohexane.
Piece of cake.
It shouldn't take too long, Miss Evans.
Plan on working with me for an hour or so.
- Nancy.
- Chip.
Oh, Chip.
Oh, Chip.
Chip, stop.
I have to ask you something.
Let's talk later, Nance.
We only have an hour.
- Chip, stop.
- Methoxychlor.
- You had a fight with your dad, didn't you? - No.
Don't lie.
I heard him tell his lawyer that he'd been betrayed by his own flesh and blood.
He said he had vipers in his nest, and he was going to clear them out once and for all.
- Are you thinking what I think you're thinking? - I don't know what to think.
- I'm scared.
- Look, Nance, just calm down.
- Chip, stop.
- Hexachlorocyclohexane.
So we had a shouting match.
Big deal.
It wasn't like it was the first time.
You know what a wild man he was.
It was about us, right? He found out about us, didn't he? He was going to cut you out of the will.
He said so.
I didn't kill him.
The old bird was my father.
- I've seen enough.
- On the contrary.
I don't think we've seen anything yet.
- Do you think Chip killed Myron? - It's a distinct possibility.
This case has been deceptively irritating from the outset.
I suggest we move cautiously, get a second opinion.
Whose? Tillema.
T-I-L-L- E- M-A.
I got it.
Tillema, the answering service shouldn't have given you this number.
- Tillema? Wait a minute.
- Shh.
Wasn't he casting director in Attack of the Terrible Snapping Things? - I can't hear you.
I'm sorry.
Just a moment.
- Mr.
Tillema this is Teri.
Tillema, the girls are booked for the foreseeable future.
- Don't listen to her! We'll do it! - Whatever it is! Hold just one moment, please.
Now, listen to me, you overgrown Shirley Temples.
It is my job to see to it that you live long enough to play character parts.
But you don't understand.
We have been bouncing around this town for six whole months.
- Knocking on doors.
- Singing our hearts out.
- Dancing our feet off.
- And what do we have to show for it? - Corns.
- We're practically over the hill.
- Washed up.
- Wiped out.
- All right.
- I've got the perfect part for you.
- Yeah? You can play a couple of corpses.
You walk out that door, and that part's yours permanently.
Now, park it.
Tillema, I'm awfully sorry to keep you waiting.
That's quite all right.
I am very determined.
- Ah, Mr.
- Mr.
Steele, what a surprise.
- We need to ask you a few questions.
- Questions? Oh, uh, come in.
Come in.
- We believe we know who murdered Myron Flowers.
- You do? - Yes.
Domestic homicide, it seems.
Classic case.
Greed, passion.
I knew you'd get to the bottom of it.
It was just a matter of time.
Fitts, you've known Chip all his life.
Yes, and I know he'll never forgive me for this.
We don't mean for you to condemn him in any way, but in your heart of hearts do you believe he could murder his father over Nancy Evans? Chip? - What? - Hmm.
Chip! Yes, of course! Chip! And Nancy! Yes! Yes.
Now it all makes sense.
- How so, Mr.
Fitts? - Well, um- Myron had plans- ambitious plans- for Chip but he never approved of his relationship with Nancy, thought she was too common.
Naturally, Chip tried to keep his relationship with her a secret but they're kids, and when kids are in love- Yes, we know: All the world's a stage.
Please don't misunderstand me.
I love that boy like a son, but he's impulsive.
Matter of fact, I heard him this morning making plane reservations.
- Where to? - Singapore, I think he said.
How hard would it be to disappear in that part of the world? Especially with 25 million in cab fare.
Fitts, I'm sorry you had to hear the news like this.
- I'm sure it must come as a bit of a shock.
- I'll cope, Mr.
Good man.
Good man.
Who's- Is this Petula? Yes.
This is Mr.
Tillema again.
Do you expect Toni and Teri to check in? Listen.
When they do, would you tell them please to meet me at 1209 Desmond Estates? Yes.
I've got something really juicy for them.
And so, returning to your father's office to retrieve the poisoned atomizer you had no alternative but to shoot him when you realized your original plan had failed.
But then, upon leaving the scene of the crime you encountered two singing telegram girls.
Knowing that they could identify you, you followed them and tried to kill them in my office.
That's a great story, Steele.
Unfortunately, it isn't true.
- I didn't shoot my father.
- We'll see about that, eh? Yes, we'll see about that.
This way, girls.
Don't be bashful.
There you go.
Now, may I introduce to you Chip Flowers? - Hi.
- How you doin'? Closer, girls.
Take a good look.
- I imagine it was a trifle dark last night.
- I thought you said the guy was gonna be here.
Take a good look.
I want us to be absolutely positive.
- Him? - There.
You see? - I've never seen that guy before in my life.
- Me neither.
- But that's impossible.
- Mr.
Steele, perhaps we'd better- Everything points to him.
I mean, his father cut him out of his will because he disapproved of Chip's liaison with Nancy.
You have got one minute to get out of this house.
Please try to understand, Mrs.
Steele is known for his rather unorthodox methods.
I assure you he's not accusing anyone.
He's merely attempting to eliminate suspects.
I don't exactly like the way this guy works.
In fact- Fantastic.
Thanks, Petula.
Tillema called again.
He wants us to come over for an audition! - That's great.
- I have a feeling about this.
Me too.
We're gonna knock 'em dead.
You can't expect textbook logic from every case.
If we've missed something, we'll find it, even if we have to go back to square one.
Square one? I've never gone backwards in my life.
How'd it go, boss? - You may be witnessing Steele's last case, Mildred.
- Oh, that bad, huh? - Mildred, where are the girls? - I thought they were with you.
- Mildred, where are the girls? - I thought they were with you.
- No.
They left us.
- Well, they didn't come out the front.
- I would've seen them.
- Then they must've slipped out the back.
But where would they go? Oh.
Hello? Who's this? Petula.
Oh, good.
This is Mildred Krebs with the William Morris Agency.
No, I won't.
The William Morris Agency never holds.
Now, listen.
I got a deal in turnaround here, and Metro wants to take an option on it.
And I think Teri and Toni would be absolutely perfect for the part.
What? I know they've got other offers.
Do you think the William Morris Agency would want them if they didn't? Now, where can I find them? Thanks, kid.
Hit it, Fred.
Thanks for the lift.
- We're gonna get this gig, Ter.
I know it.
- Yeah.
Two weeks from now, we won't be able to walk down the street without bodyguards.
We'll have a house in the hills, a billboard on Sunset- Toni, I just want you to know- Well, if it wasn't for you, I probably would've gone back to Sioux Falls a long time ago.
Oh, Teri.
If it wasn't for you, I'd probably still be working in my brother's auto body shop in North Hollywood.
- Well, I guess we make a pretty good team, huh? - The best.
Now, let's get in there and give them everything we've got.
Hello? - Mr.
Tillema? - Hello? Is anybody home? How do you like that? The guy stiffed us.
Not quite.
Stay put, Mildred! Come on! Hurry! Hurry! Here.
- Behind us! - Behind us! Who? - Fitts! - Fitts? Yeah.
Okay, okay.
I give up.
I did it.
I shot Myron Flowers.
Stop groveling, Fitts, and have some dignity, for heaven's sake.
- Mr.
Steele, Miss Holt! - What is it, Mildred? The coroner just called.
Myron Flowers didn't die of gunshot wounds after all.
Oh, good Lord.
Isn't anything routine anymore? - What did he die of? - He was poisoned.
- Poisoned? - Poisoned? Why would Fitts poison Myron and then shoot him? I didn't poison him and then shoot him.
I just shot him.
- That means you shot a dead man, Fitts.
- I did? - Yeah.
Just like showbiz, Fitts.
- It's all in the timing.
- Does that mean I'm innocent? - Not quite.
What does it mean? It means we go back not to square one, but to square three.
Fitts shot Myron, all right, but only after he'd been poisoned.
Why would you poison him if you were going to shoot him? How many times do I have to say it? I didn't poison him.
I just shot him.
Then who poisoned him? Hmm.
Do we have an answer? We're going to look awfully foolish if we don't.
- Obviously it was a man.
- How do we know it was a man? A man with a ski mask broke into my loft.
And any fool knows it wasn't Fitts, since he would've murdered Toni and Teri knowing they could identify him.
Which means the intruder was looking for something.
- The poisoned atomizer.
- And in order to poison the atomizer he had to have access to the lab.
- Chip! - Chip.
Seems our Mr.
Steele was right after all.
Oh, dear.
I couldn't run away with a man who's a murderer.
- You couldn't? - You couldn't? No.
It wasn't Chip and Nancy Myron found out about.
It was Chip and Brenda.
Apparently Brenda had one too many flowers in her bouquet.
Myron had to go.
I told you I would take care of Myron, Chip.
You told me Myron found out about us.
Yes, but what better way to manipulate you into murdering the one person that stood between her and the man she really loved.
You've been had, Fitts.
She never planned to run away with you.
It was Chip she wanted.
And what about Nancy? What were you going to do about her? That's what I'd like to know.
I loved you, Chip.
You loved me.
Yeah, but not like I love Brenda.
She's like- I don't know.
- She's something else.
- She certainly is.
She's busted.
Chip! Chip! Nancy, don't waste your breath.
Somehow, when you said we'd celebrate my birthday with 42nd Street then champagne at your place, I had an entirely different evening in mind.
We have the best seats in the house, Mr.
You know, boss, I think they have real potential.
- Oh, you've a keen eye for talent, Mildred, keen eye.
- Thanks, chief.
Cheer up, Mr.
Birthdays have a way of rolling around year after year.
Even a real birthday could not be as memorable as this one, Miss Holt.