Ride (2016) s01e05 Episode Script

Gone Guy

1 Today on the Rose Cottage agenda, preparing for our Guy Fawkes Bonfire.
What's a Guy Fawkes? What's a bonfire? I love bonfires! 1605.
Guy Fawkes was part of a conspiracy to blow up the King, but he failed, and a bonfire was lit to celebrate.
We continue this tradition each year.
Probably, I'm guessing, without the blowing stuff up part? Each house will build their own straw guy.
The best design, chosen by Lady Covington, will be tossed onto the bonfire.
Wait.
So you win the contest, but the thing you made gets destroyed? It's an honour.
Our house wins ten points.
Can we roast hot dogs, make smores and tell scary stories? There will be no hot dogs, and whatever that other thing is.
We will build a traditional guy, dressed in period clothing, just the way Lady Covington likes it.
That is how Rose Cottage always wins.
Always? Always.
But what if we try something different this year? We could - I have two more minutes for this meeting, and no time for interruptions.
Do you know why? Because they're coming to take you away somewhere quiet, and soothing? (GIGGLES) Because I am being forced to spend my precious time training you to ride a horse.
Something the rest of us had to master to even get here.
Wow.
Thanks.
Come prepared to work next time, girls.
We meet again before curfew.
Make sure this gets to Will Palmerston by lunch.
I think if Elaine had her choice, I'd be starring as Guy Fawkes in this year's celebration.
It'll be okay.
ELAINE: Bridges! Go, go, go.
Coming, coming.
We can't let Elaine win again.
She'll be insufferable.
I say we have our guy built professionally.
By who? Ye Olde Guy Shoppe? We don't need a professional, okay? We just need a plan.
Well, I offered one but I was ridiculed.
Ridiculed? That was nothing! Just slow your roll, gentlemen.
Okay? Same team, right? Fine.
I'm on the team.
I'll be the captain! Dudes! Alright, who's got an idea? I had a thought.
You guys would have to be ready for some next level prankage.
Yeah.
No excuses.
I'm not making an excuse! It is totally a real thing! He's giving me the evil eyes! And now he's giving you the side evil eye, which means he's about 5.
6 seconds away from doing his famous drop and dash.
(SIGH) At this pace, I'll be in uni before you get a saddle on him.
Okay, relax.
I'll try again.
( HORSE SNORTS) (LAUGHS) It's not cute.
We're being watched.
My reputation as your tutor is at stake here.
TK, Elaine's reputation is at stake, so you need to get it together.
He says that he's already one of the coolest horses in the stable, and he doesn't need your street cred to elevate his rock star status.
(HORSE GALLOPS) See? I told you! Evil eyes! (GROANS) Is there anybody out there? TK? Hello? Anybody? Oh, so now you want to participate? (SIGHS) Hey, did you get my - No, I can't go with you to the bonfire.
But we're a thing.
No, we're not a thing.
Yes, we are.
We're not a thing! We made it official before summer.
Elaine, yes, there was the end of year dance thing.
Okay.
But it was a moment.
We'd been in contact all summer.
You've been in contact.
No harm, no foul.
Um, I'm so busy with bonfire night to organize, and I'm tutoring that new girl, so I really barely Yeah, yeah, you must be jammed.
Right.
Completely.
So you see, Will, as much as I'd like to, I just don't have the time to invest in a relationship right now.
Sure.
Whatever you say.
I'm glad we got this sorted.
Alright, girls, we need to step it up.
We will beat Juniper House if it's the last thing we do.
Patel, you're on wardrobe.
Pinkus, you're on straw.
You - I don't know your name - secure a hat.
Uh, uh - Bridges is to trot four lengths and end in a reverse.
Elaine, Kit's not here.
May I make a suggestion? Perhaps Anya could take over construction of the guy.
(CHUCKLES) Wait.
You can't possibly be serious.
You're swimming in responsibility.
Everyone could use a hand once in a while.
Even you, Elaine.
But I always supervise the guy.
That's how we always win.
ANYA: I promise to check in with you.
Hourly if I have to! But I've got a plan! Exactly.
You've already planned it.
And Anya will follow that plan to a T.
Thank you, Ms.
Warrington.
The girls and I won't let you down.
We won't let you down, either, Elaine.
I promise.
That's settled then.
Back to work, girls.
Everyone is to do exactly as Patel says.
Am I clear? I think we can make a few teeny tiny changes to the plan, right? Just a few cosmetic things.
ELAINE: I hope you made some progress.
KIT: Maybe.
One: get TK to keep saddle on.
Two, get on saddle.
Three, ride TK.
Simple as that.
Got it? What do you think, dude? Got it? (LAUGHS) We can not fail.
We'll be here all day and all night if we have to, but you will get on that horse.
(HORSE GRUNTS) NAV: Nicely done, gents.
(LAUGHING) What are you doing here? What are you doing at Violet Cottage? Just borrowing a blouse.
Just hoping to run into a girl I like.
Which one? Which blouse? Which girl? Uh, Violet.
Well, you know, her name's Violet.
Hmm.
I don't think we've met.
What's with him? Uh That's Nigel.
He's considering Covington for his education.
His dad's in Parliament.
I'm not sure why that's relevant - Well, we should be going now.
Um, Nigel has a rather delicate constitution, and he suffers from vertigo.
And mumps.
And uh, cataplexy.
So - Yeah.
Uh, later! Cataplexy.
Violet? I know.
Six.
Oh, come on, buddy! (SIGHS) There's something wrong with this horse.
If you were less rigid, we may be able to figure something out.
Being rigid is what makes me a winner.
Look, I can't have you scoring a zero, and that is the score you'll receive if you don't ride.
See, that stresses me out.
You're my responsibility now.
You're Team Elaine, and Elaine always succeeds.
Fine, but stop pressuring me to ride, or I won't.
I'm afraid.
And then I will get a big, fat zero.
I won't accept that.
It's a legitimate problem.
Well, then solve it.
Are you two so wrapped up in yourselves you can't see what's going on around you? Mr.
Bridges, we just - You almost had a very dangerous situation on your hands.
That's enough for today.
Go on.
But dad, I - It's Mr.
Bridges right now.
Walk away.
Then I said, "How about a little glitz and glitter?" And he's surely the best guy England has ever seen.
Oh! Oh no! No, no, no, no! Madhu, I have to go! Where is he? Oh, this isn't happening! Where's our guy? He just went out for a walk.
His legs were stiff.
I think he maybe needed a little personal time.
Be real, Anya.
I don't have time for your comedy act.
Uh, I left him in the art room.
To dry.
I put a sign on the door.
Nobody's getting in there.
No one.
Why are you panicking? (LAUGHS) No, I'm not! Not at all! I'm just so excited.
Alright.
See you in a bit.
Good day, sir.
(SIGHS) (HORSES TROTTING) (LAUGHTER) Oh, someone went a little bit crazy with the glue gun.
I quite literally have no words to describe that.
My name is Robert.
My mother picked out my clothes.
(LAUGHTER) Excuse me, sir, but pardon.
The customers have complained, and you're going to have to leave.
What kind of disco is this? (LAUGHTER) Ahh! You guys are hilarious and all, but what if there's a, you know, Well, then Robert here will distract them with some of his sweet dance moves.
He could have a point.
Not Robert.
I mean the other guy.
The Canadian.
Thank you.
Yeah well, we might want to hide them somewhere a bit less obvious.
Yeah.
Thunder, if you see Elaine, let her know I'm looking for her.
(HORSE TROTTING) (GROANS) TK, come on! We're on the school's roster now, so we will need to ride together.
And a blanket is barely anything.
Plus, there's Elaine's reputation to consider.
Is anybody getting this? Elaine? (CELL PHONE RINGS) Hey, where are you? ELAINE: Setting up for the bonfire.
You'll have to complete what's on your list today with TK, and you'll have to do it alone.
Peaches, do I have to do everything for you? Hmm.
Well, it is going to be hard for me to do it on my own.
I could give it my all if I knew there'd be smores at the bonfire.
I don't even know what that is.
Perfection.
Graham cracker, chocolate and a perfectly toasted marshmallow.
Disgusting.
Absolutely not.
Oh, okay.
Well I'll just tell Lady C that I'm practicing on my own this afternoon.
I'm sure she won't mind.
(HORSE SNORTS) (SIGHS) Fine! Get me marshmallows! Stat! (LAUGHS) Hey, if you behave, I'll share.
Hey, it's getting late.
Get out of here.
You okay? Yeah.
All good.
KIT: You, my friend, seem to confuse being funny with being stubborn.
You're a horse, not a mule.
Nice outfit.
Is that for the bonfire? I'm not going anywhere until I get this guy tacked up.
My time's running out.
Okay.
Well, let him smell the blanket.
That's normally a good approach.
Let him cuddle with it.
And keep talking to him.
Alright, here we, um, here's a nice, cozy blanket.
Smells just like my jacket, dude.
Same thing.
(LAUGHS) I don't want to miss my chance at my first genuine English Yeah, and I don't want her to miss it either, mate, so get it together.
Yeah? She's been working with you all day, and now you're just being greedy and that's rude.
Here you go.
You're such a good boy.
Yes you are.
It's just me, buddy.
Just me.
It's fine.
Nothing to worry about.
Oh.
Ah, easy, Whoa, TK.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Oh! Okay.
Okay.
Uh, okay.
I'm riding.
I'm riding TK.
WILL: (LAUGHS) I can see that.
I'm riding! I'm riding TK! Whoa! Now I'm stopping.
Okay, let's not go crazy.
(LAUGHS) Oh! (LAUGHS) I did it! Yeah, and nobody can say you didn't.
(LAUGHS) Oh! Pardon me! What are you doing? Building an emergency guy! Sorry you had to start again.
How do you know? Uh, you messed up the last one pretty large.
Why would you say that? No reason.
I'm just - How's your romance with Violet? Great.
Yeah, she's great.
Um, kind of chews weird, but - Josh! (GROANS) Right this way.
First form is over there.
No, don't touch the food.
I'll tell you when you can touch it.
Thank you.
Hey, can you find me Anya? I need to approve our guy.
KIT: Come on, you have got to try these.
Yo, dude, you got a quick minute? Not now.
Is the coast clear? Did you drop something? I've totally botched this.
I don't know what to do.
Our guy is missing.
I've looked everywhere.
I tried to make one but it's a total disaster.
Give me one of those more thingies.
I'd like to taste one before I die.
What do you mean missing? Vanished.
Elaine is going to kill me.
I'm not going to lie.
That is a possibility.
But who would have done that? It doesn't make any sense.
(GONG RINGS) Lady Covington is ready to pick a winner.
Everyone to the dining hall for the judging.
Anya better have made a good guy.
Otherwise she's going to pay for it.
I didn't know the end was going to look like this.
How was your last meal? It was the best thing I've ever tasted.
(LAUGHS) Ms.
Wiltshire, Ms.
Bridges.
Lady Covington, exciting evening, isn't it? I would like a progress report.
Not about the exciting evening.
About the work you are doing together.
Well, I tried - And wow, did she succeed? I got on TK.
You did? Really? Well, of course you'll continue working together, as it seems to be working out so well.
Lady Covington, I really don't - (CROWD MURMURING) Good evening, students.
I'm sure you're all anxious to get to the judging.
So without further ado, let us begin.
Reveal the candidates! (CROWD WHISPERING) Could somebody please explain the meaning of this? There should be a dozen.
I'm dead.
I'm dead.
Where are the rest of them? She's going to blame me.
LADY C: We're missing Violet Cottage, Alder House, Clover - Excuse me, ma'am, I need to say something.
NAV: Lady Covington! If I may - We narrowed down the entries through a pre-screening and voting process.
I call foul play! Nav - She can't blame you if there's nothing to blame you for.
Excuse me, Navarro.
Might that be a Bingham uniform on your house's guy? It certainly is, My Lady.
Goodness me.
If I didn't know better, I would say that guy bears a striking resemblance to Headmistress Branson.
(LAUGHS) Oh, what a coincidence that our guy should depict our biggest rival.
Well, Rose Cottage entrant is frankly a bit of a dog's breakfast.
I'm rather surprised it made it through your pre-screening process.
Juniper House is awarded ten points.
(CHEERING) After your bonfire, enjoy yourselves.
But not too much.
And remember that curfew does remain at 22:00 sharp.
Will! (CHEERING) (FIRE CRACKLING) You just stick it in the fire, and then you blow it out.
That is cheating! Respect the marshmallow.
(LAUGHS) The evening's been quite a success.
I just don't understand what happened.
But I will find out.
Spill, Anya.
Well, when I went to go get our guy he was gone.
So - eat this.
You'll feel better.
I promise.
It's almost magical.
I love bonfire night.
Yeah, me too.
Thank you for finally helping me to ride.
Cheers.
(CHUCKLES) We should do this again some time.
Yeah! Um, I'm talking with my mouth full.
I'm sorry.
(LAUGHS) And you have made a bit of a mess.
You've got some chocolate here.
And here.
And sort of like all - Stop it! (LAUGHTER) Honestly, though, you have got a bit there.
(BANGING) (HORSES WHINNYING) TK! (HORSES WHINNYING) Whoa! Whoa! It's not safe in here.
You need to get outside! No, no, I need to get to TK! Dad! Wait! Dad! Outside! Kit, go.
Hey, trust me.
(HORSES WHINNYING) No! TK is freaking out, and my dad and Will are in there! Hey, We need an ambulance.
Yeah, to Covington.
Dad?! Dad! Hey, Kit.
Please, please.

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