Riverdale (2017) s06e17 Episode Script

Chapter One Hundred and Twelve: American Psychos

I cannot believe how quickly you
were able to pull this together, Vee.

Turns out, there's a
circuit of crime conventions,
plus the idea of a serial
killer fan convention
being held in Riverdale, murder
capital of small town USA,
is too delicious for fans to pass up.

We're selling tickets to
Slaughter-Con like crazy.

So, there will be a crowd?
Do you think that will
keep TBK away, Charles?
Not if he and you are the
centerpieces of the convention.

Most serial killers are narcissists.

So, if yours is all about him,
he won't be able to resist it.

He'll want to see what
all the fuss is about.

How dangerous is this going to be?
I don't want any more
dead bodies on my property.

There's an unwritten rule for serial
killers, don't kill where you eat.

Plus, we love our fans.
don't want to murder them.

Well, sounds like those attending
and those working at
the con will be safe.

But what about you, Bee?
I mean, you're the Clarice
to TBK's Hannibal Lecter.

He sees us as kindred spirits,
so that should offer me a
little bit of protection.

And we'll have an agent
stationed outside the house
to make sure that Charles
and my mom are safe.

Otherwise, I'll be close by.

Well, I will be too.

TBK doesn't know that he's
not in my blind spot anymore.

I should be able to
pick him out of a crowd.

Well, I've pretty much
finalized our event schedule.

Curdle will be performing
a simulated autopsy.

Agent Drake will be
giving a symposium on

Whatever that is.

We'll be hosting panels for the
Black Hood and the Starkweathers.

A Gryphon and Gargoyles tournament.

And, of course, for the main event,
a one-on-one sit down
with the Girl in the Well,
TBK's most famous survivor.

What about live entertainment?
Have you booked an act yet?
Kevin will be presenting
a few musical numbers
from the Holy Grail of
serial killer musicals.

- Sweeney Todd?
- Alas, no.

American Psycho, based
on the Bret Easton Ellis novel,
with songs by Duncan Sheik.

I made Kevin promise me that
he would push the envelope
with the staging and choreography.

Make it all very '80s club glamfab.

Andrews' strike
has upended my schedule somewhat,
and failure is not an option.

In one month's time, Bailey's
Comet will pass over this fair town,
and we'd better get the
railroad built by then.

Otherwise, we'll have to wait
another 65 years for its return.

What does a comet have
to do with your railway?
Well, Bailey's Comet possesses
unique celestial energies
that will benefit me in my plans.

So, mind-control the strikers.

You can do that, can't you?
Of course I can.

I heard back from the union delegate,
and they are supporting our strike,
which means they're
setting up a relief fund
to help cover living expenses
for any worker on the picket line.

That's right.

And until the work fund is activated,
all of you and your families
can eat at Pop's for free.

We're in this together.

Thanks for providing
those meals, Tabitha.

It makes a difference.

Of course.

Plus, honestly, anything to keep busy.

How's Chuck doing, do you know?
He's still in the bunker,
still trying to quiet
the voices he's hearing.

He's not drinking again, is he?
No, definitely not.

Well, that's good, then.

He'll be okay.
He'll beat this.

Pray tell.

What can I do for you?
Tell me.

Well, I wanted you to hear this from me.

Fangs and I are getting married.

My, my, my.
been awfully busy lately.

Ah! Toni, meet my friend Heather.


Is this the Heather you had told
me about from back in the day?
- Your first
- Indeed.

Heather and I recently reconnected.

I had no idea.
I'm I'm happy for you.

Um, well, I didn't know you had company,
so I'll get out of your hair,
but I wanted to let you know
that I'm having a little
bachelorette girls night out,
dancing at the Babylonium.

We're gonna crash Veronica's
after hours dance party
at the serial killer convention.

How apropos.

I would love it if
you came.
Both of you.

Cheryl, how are you feeling?
Do you wanna talk about Toni's visit?
Whatever for?
Your ex-girlfriend just told
you she's getting married.

It would be completely normal
if you felt strange or upset about it.

I am anything but
completely normal, Heather.

So, spare me your unsolicited advice,
and stop building a false
narrative about what I'm feeling,
because the fact of
the matter is, I'm fine.

God, I hope this was a good idea.

Welcome, foul fiends and friends,
to our first annual serial
killer fan convention,
To kick things off,
the Babylonium is proud to
present a little amuse-bouche
from American Psycho, the musical.

So without further ado,
please welcome Riverdale's
very own Kevin Keller
as investment banker by
day, serial killer by night,
Patrick Bateman.

I do suspect I'm one of few ♪
I can show you something new ♪
All the constraints ♪
They are all gone ♪
I'll confess no interest
in right and wrong ♪
Are you losing too much blood? ♪
Let it flow ♪
Let it flow ♪
Just keep breathing if you can ♪
You'll see I'm not a common man ♪
I'm needing so much more ♪
You will see ♪
Why do you have this?
That knife belonged to
your father, the Black Hood.

I bought it on eSlay.

Why did you bring it here?
I I wanted you to sign it for me.

You wanted her autograph?
You're my hero, Betty Cooper.

You're practically one of them.

What did you just say?
I would be honored to be your
first official kill, but
- Enough, we're done, come on.

- Hey!
Come on.

I am something other than ♪
A common man ♪
I'm not a common man ♪
Hello, citizens.

Enjoying your free meals, I see.


You'll need all your energy
when you resume work on my railroad,

Not a snowball's chance in hell.


You will walk out that door,
but you will return to work.

You will all return to work

So, what is hybristophilia?
Clinically speaking, it's
the term for when someone
is attracted to a
murderer or a criminal.

Basically, it's a kink.

The person is turned on by
evildoing and law-breaking.

It may sound abnormal,
but there are some people
who just have this innate attraction
to the darker, more taboo side of life.

It's actually a common phenomenon
Listen, to each their own,
I'm not judging anyone or anything,
but that's kind of weird, right?
I mean, who would be that
drawn to that kind of thing?
I don't know.

Hey, Tabitha, what's up?
I've got Toni here with me,
but they're gone, Archie.

Every single crew member left the diner
to go back to work for Percival.


Why am I not surprised?
Have you heard the good
news about Toni and Fangs?
My lawyer just gave
me the super fun update.

In that case,
would you like to join me in
cursing their unholy union?
I went by the site.

The guys didn't even
acknowledge that I was there.

They're working like robots.

Same with Fangs.

Percival's definitely
mind-controlling them now,
which begs the question,
why did he wait so long?
Maybe it's harder for Percival
to control larger groups
of people at the same time.

Well, if you're right, we might be
able to break his hold on the crew.

And we could figure out a tether
that could break Percival's spell.

Fangs said his tether
would be Baby Anthony.

Well, that makes sense.

These guys love their families.

That's why they're busting their asses
to provide for them, their children.

So we remind them what
they're striking for.

Better lives for their loved ones.

And I have an idea for how to do that.

Songs have always been a big
part of the labor movement,
used to create solidarity
amongst the workers.

Archie, you have the contact info
for everyone on Percival's crew, right?
And a guitar.

According to the Maleficarum,
this is the opposite of
a love spell, Kev-Kev.

This is a wedge spell
meant to drive a wedge
between lovers, obviously.

Uh, what's the wedge?
I'm leaving those details
for the universe to decide.

"I implore you,
spirits, to curse these lovers,
Antoinette Topaz and Fangs Fogarty,
with feelings of acrimony,
acerbity and vexation
towards one another.

May this drive a wedge
between them for all eternity.
What the hell do you all want?
We know what Percival is doing
to this crew, Uncle Frank,
controlling and manipulating them.

So, we and their families
are here in solidarity
to break Percival's spell,
and remind them that we stand together.

And that we support them
and believe in what they fight for,
which is a better life for
them and their families.

Oh, yeah? What's the guitar for?
As we go marching, marching ♪
In the beauty of the day ♪
A million darkened kitchens ♪
A thousand mill lofts gray ♪
Fogarty, what the hell are
you doing? Get back to work.

You walk off this job site,
that's it, you're done.

That a sudden sun discloses ♪
For the people hear us singing ♪
Carlos! You're fired!
Bread and roses ♪
Bread and roses ♪
You're fired! You're all fired!
Our days shall not be sweated ♪
From birth until life closes ♪
Hearts starve as well as bodies ♪
Give us bread but give us roses ♪
Day one down, and no TBK sightings.

There's still plenty of time
for him to make an entrance.

The main event isn't
till tomorrow after all.

By the way, where's the boyfriend?
Is this all a little too much for him?
Uh, he had some union
stuff to take care of.

But, yeah, he might have
been a little weirded out
by your symposium.

I get that.

Uh, listen, Betty.

I'm just gonna say it.

I'm attracted to you.

Oh, wow.


Thank you.
Thank you.

I'm I'm flattered.

But I'm with Archie.

Hmm, is that an exclusive thing?
Yeah, it is.

I hear you.
guess I was just thinking
that you guys are so different,
and we have so much in common.

Archie is cut from a
different cloth, yeah.

And maybe I've been
totally misreading things,
but I swear I've been
picking up vibes from you.

Vibes from me?

Tell me,
am I wrong about that, Betty?
Morning, Agent Cooper.

How'd you sleep?
When do you wanna head
over to the Babylonium?

Um, you know, you don't
have to come, Arch.

I'm 100% fine going alone.

There's tons of security.

Well, it wouldn't be bad
for me to check on the crew.

The condos kind of freak me out.

Maybe I'll take part of the day off.

That's totally fine.

It's fine.

Bonjour, Fangs.

I was in the neighborhood,
and thought I could drop off
some freshly baked cherry muffins.

Oh, uh, right now is
not a good time, Cheryl.

It's okay, Fangs.
You can let her in.


Oh, my, T.

Is something the matter?
Baby Anthony's been up crying for hours.

The doctor thinks it's colic.

We barely just got him down to sleep.

He started running a
It's so weird.

He's never been like this.

I see.

And when did you first
notice this affliction?
Yesterday afternoon-ish.

I think we're gonna have to cancel
the bachelorette dance party,
at least until we figure out
what's going on with Baby Anthony.

Of course.
Let me know if
there's anything I can do.

Wait, Baby Anthony is a wedge?
That wasn't supposed to happen.

Of course not, Kevin.

But we didn't specify
what the wedge should be.

This is your fault.

Oh, my God, I'm never
gonna forgive myself
if we hurt that baby.

Isn't there someone
we can call? An expert?
So, she professed her love for you,
like, out of some romance novel?
That's unprofessional.

Yeah, tell me about it.

- But it's made me start to think
- Uh-oh.

The truth is I
compartmentalize with Archie.

I don't talk about work.

I have dark thoughts, but
I don't go there with him.

With Drake,
I don't feel the need to censor myself.

Yeah, but Betty, everyone
compartmentalizes with everyone.

Thus, I don't see a problem here.

I mean, it's not like you're
actually attracted to Drake.


Betty Cooper, are you
hot for Agent Drake?

But I did have a dream about her.

And yeah, on paper, we're compatible.

Can I give you some advice?
A, don't go there with Drake,
and B,
talk to Archie.

Many of my relationships
have ended sadly
because we didn't have the
convos we needed to have,
or we had them too late.


Thank you, Vee.
I appreciate it.

Drake? Hi.

- May we have a word?
- Sure.
What's up?
Look, Betty's going
through a lot right now,
and you confessing your
attraction to her, not cool.

So here's a thought.

Why don't you focus on your work,
keep your libido to yourself,
and let my friend figure out her stuff.

Sound good?

If you'll excuse me.

Well, that should take
care of the, um, colic.

He's sleeping so soundly.

Thank you so much for coming, Heather.

- We were literally dying.

- Not at all.

As I said to Cheryl when she
called, I'm happy to help.

And as a registered
midwife and night nurse,
I know a little something
about crying babies.

And what you gave him
was literally just
Just a calming tonic that Heather
concocted in the greenhouse.

It must be the calming perfume
I concocted in my greenhouse.

With a spoonful of sugar.

Oldest trick in the bock.

Thank you.
Thank you so so much.

Thank you, Heather.

Basically, when I was in the Well,
TBK gave me a choice.

If I dismembered the body,
if I proved that we
were kindred spirits,
then he would let me go.

And what did you do?
I did it.

And it's haunted me every day since.

A devastating account
from a formidable survivor.

Now, I'd like to open it up
to questions from our audience.

Yes, you, with the Black Dahlia T-shirt.

First of all, I just wanna say
you're so brave and amazing.

Did you have a question?
I just want to know,
why do serial killers wear masks?
Generally, masks can help a killer
disassociate from the
violent act he's committing,
help eliminate any shame
that they might eventually feel.


Looks like we have a caller.

You're on with Alice
and Betty Cooper.

What's your question?
Tell us, pretty Betty,
why do you wear a mask?
I don't know what you're talking about.

I'm not wearing a mask.

Oh, Betty, don't lie.

You're wearing a mask right now.

A human mask.

But I've seen underneath it.

Your true face when
you cut up that body,
and it was beautiful.

Ladies and gentlemen,
I believe we have TBK, the Trash
Bag Killer himself on the line.

What is all this, Betty,
this convention you're putting on?
If you wanna share your
side of the story, TBK,
why don't you join me on
the stage if you're here?
This pathetic attempt to entrap me
is beneath you, Betty.

And if you did catch me, then what?
Would you lay down your sword,
move into a house with a white
picket fence and a red door
with your handsome, all-American
boyfriend in this sleepy, quiet town.

Do you think that's how this ends?
Maybe it does.

No, Betty.

It ends with you and me
and a kiss in the dark.

No, you're wrong.
That's not how
One of the most important lessons
I can impart to you as a witch
is to never cast a spell
when you're in an
emotionally volatile state.

It always backfires.


So, now do you wanna talk about
what you're so churned up about?
Is it Toni's wedding?
In truth
part of me was holding
on to the idea that
Toni and I were fated to reunite.

Realizing otherwise
was admittedly cutting,
but also,
I think it's you.

It's plain as day that I'm drawn to you.

I don't wanna get hurt again.

I understand your apprehension.

But Cheryl, all I know is that
we're getting a second chance.

Let's just have fun,
see what happens.

Well, there is Toni's
bachelorette party.

Veronica invited the girls over
to get ready in one of
her champagne suites.

We could possibly do that.

In honor of this being one of Toni's
final outings as a single woman,
the absinthe is flowing.

I had Katie Keane send us
these chic dresses from Lacy's.

So ladies, dig in, drink up
as you make tonight
all about Toni Topaz.

I want blackened, charred Mahi Mahi ♪
It works so well with Isaac Mizrahi ♪
I'll have soda and crème de menthe ♪
Tastes so good with
Oscar de la Renta ♪
The ginger mango ♪
Soy black bass ♪
Compliments ♪
The beige Bill Blass ♪
I will not touch a drop of red wine ♪
Don't wanna ruin The Calvin Klein ♪
Chanel, Gaultier or Giorgio Armani ♪
Moschino, Alia or Norma Kamali ♪
Should I rock the Betsey Johnson? ♪
Or stick with classic
Comme des Garçons ♪
No parachute or Fiorucci ♪
I'm with Prada ♪
I'm with Gucci ♪
When one goes shopping ♪
It's best to take care ♪
As some of us know ♪
You are what you wear ♪
Chanel, Gaultier or Giorgio Armani ♪
Moschino, Alia or Norma Kamali ♪
In a certain kind of neighborhood ♪
You might get away
with Vivian Westwood ♪
But by von Furstenberg we swear ♪
It's a wrap ♪
You are what you wear ♪
You are what you wear ♪
Hey, pretty girl ♪
Do you wanna dance?
Do you wanna get lucky?
Well, this is your chance ♪
The drinks are on me ♪
Can I be frank? ♪
I'm doing quite well
at my investment bank ♪
What do you do? ♪
What do you do for a living? ♪
No, don't answer that ♪
I don't care ♪
I'm just kidding ♪
You can ignore my friends at the bar ♪
They're trying to score ♪
But they never get far ♪
That was some girl ♪
I forget her name ♪
She thinks we're in love ♪
Does she think I'm insane? ♪
But don't mind that ♪
We should follow our bliss ♪
I know a great spot ♪
It's called the abyss ♪
Don't be nervous ♪
Invite your friends ♪
The night is young ♪
But it all depends ♪
Betty, what are you doing?
This is part of my act.

I thought we knew how
to party in Greendale,
but you Riverdale girls
really put us to shame.

You know, if you could spare a moment,
I would really love
to show you something.

Cheryl, it's
It's us
from when we first met.

I painted it a while back.

It's breathtaking.

Thank you.

You know,
I had more fun tonight
than I've had in a
really, really long time.

Oh, let me show you the light ♪
You got me falling
through endless skies ♪
And all my sins ♪
I didn't hear you come in last night.

Seem like you guys had a lot of fun.

Yeah, a lot of dancing and drinking.

And I saw TBK.

Wait, what?
I'm fine.

He slipped away before
I could get too close.

And what does this mean for
the last day of the convention?
Well, Kevin is bailing
on his final performance
because I messed up his vision.

So, I'm actually gonna step in.

To perform?
It's the perfect opportunity
to use myself as bait.

Once I start singing,
he'll be drawn to me.

Agent Drake and Veronica
are gonna lock all the doors
in and out of the casino.

If TBK is there, he
won't get away this time.

And I'm guessing if I
tell you that this is crazy
and dangerous,
you're still gonna go through with it.

This is who I am, Arch.

This is what I do.

And you have to be okay with that.

Or not.

But I have been thinking
about what he said on the phone
yesterday about houses
and picket fences.

And Toni getting married and
our pregnancy scare and
The truth is, Arch, I don't really know
if I want any of those things.

But I know that you do.

I do.

So is that a deal breaker, then?
Because I know it was
for you and Veronica once.

Maybe we should talk about this tonight.

When you're home,
after you've caught TBK.

I'll be at Pop's with the crew.

unless you want me at the casino.

I do.

But it might keep TBK away.

I'll be protected, though.

And whatever happens,
I'll come back here
and I'll text you.

Archie and I had that
talk that you suggested.

Okay, and?
And I don't know.

I don't know.
We'll just keep talking.

But I'm worried that we're
just too different, Vee.

That I'm too dark for him.

Too dark? Betty
By my count
I've killed more people than you.

My husband and my father,
both in cold blood.

- Geraldo accidently.

- Okay.

You don't need to go there, Vee.

Okay, my point is
We're all dark in Riverdale, all right?
And Archie's a big boy.

You'd be surprised what he can handle.

And shouldn't it be his decision anyway?
Agent Cooper.


We have a situation on
our hands in the office.

He had that gun on him.

The Black Hood's.

My father's.

Will you sign it so I can
complete my collection?
No! You psycho.

Do you know how many
people he shot with that?
Killed with that gun?
Consider it confiscated.

And you're lucky we're not arresting you
for carrying a weapon without a permit.

Drake, can you please
get him out of my sight?
I have a show to prepare for.

Of course.
Come on.

I'm so sorry, Bee.

Me too.

I thought TBK would come,
and that this would work.

Well, he should have been here.

Your song was worth
risking the electric chair.

We'll get him next time.

Well, anything I can
do to help, of course.

And let me know how round
two goes with Archie.

I will, Vee.
Thank you.

I should head out, too.

Get home safe.

Veronica was right, by the way.

You were incredible.

I gotta ask, though.

That song.

Who were you singing about?
Archie or TBK?
Have a goodnight, Drake.

He doesn't sound all right ♪
His voice, a little thin ♪
Does he need someone ♪
The way that I need him? ♪
Does everything he has ♪
Amount to enough? ♪
Does he need someone ♪
To hold when it gets rough? ♪
Am I someone he could linger on? ♪
Or would he simply ♪
Move along? ♪
Am I someone ♪
He would love more? ♪
Would I be just ♪
The girl before? ♪
A girl before ♪
A girl before ♪
He looks at me sometimes ♪
In a certain way ♪
All the fears I have ♪
Seem to fade away ♪
I know that I'm a fool ♪
To think that this is real ♪
I'm breaking every rule ♪
After he killed the guard,
he said he was gonna wait
for you in the garage.

No, Betty.
No, Betty!
Don't go.

he could linger on? ♪
Or would he simply ♪
Move along? ♪
Take off your mask.

Pretty Betty.

You brought a gun to our date.

I did.

It's my father's.

You're under arrest.

Get on your knees and
take off your mask.

Put yours on.

Stop denying who you truly are.

One of us.

an American psycho.

Do you know how many people have
said that to me over the years?
Including my father
Who first started
grooming me in this garage.

You have two options.

You kill me with your father s gun.

You and I claim the victims
waiting for us inside.

Your mother and brother.

We could dismember them together.

Why on earth would I do that?
Because we are soulmates.

You are

Put on that mask and you'll see.

As if putting on a
mask makes you a killer.

A girl before ♪
Do it.

You want to.

You're just like me.

I'm nothing like you.

Baby, what What happened?
I heard a gunshot.


TBK's dead.

Are you sure?

Is it really over?
I hope so.

Your nephew and Miss Tate
are proving to be
formidable adversaries.

And now that the workers
have established tethers,
it'll be difficult to reassert
control over their minds.

You want me to call in some guys?
To show some old-school union busting
like they did back in
Matewan and Harlan County?
No, Frank.

I want to go even more
old-school than that.

If the citizens of Riverdale
wish to stand united against me,
then the price they'll
pay for their defiance
will be truly biblical.

And then what happened?
And then, I shot him.

With that gun.

The same gun my dad
used to shoot your dad.

I think everything that
I've been feeling lately
distills down to this.

I fear that whatever was inside my dad,
whatever drove him to hurt people,
including your dad
that it's inside me, too.

I'm afraid that one day
I might not be able to
resist it.

And that you'll be a
victim to that darkness.

Or, at least fearful of it.

I'm afraid that you'll
look at me one day and
decide you won't wanna be
with me because of who I am.

Who I've always been.

That's not gonna happen, Betty.

Well, you don't know that.

But I do.

You may not trust yourself, Betty.

But I trust you.

With my life.

Your dad didn't make you a killer.

TBK didn't make you a killer.

Didn't they?
Do you remember that time
we found that baby bird?
It had fallen from a tree
and I had no clue what to do.

And you ran into the
house, grabbed a shoebox,
made a nest out of newspaper?
We looked after him.

We took turns until he
was strong enough to fly.

I hadn't remembered that until now.

All you see is the darkness.

All I see is someone
who, despite everything
that's happened to her

And you're still fighting.

And the fact that you're even worried
about hurting me or anyone else,
that shows what's in your heart.

Do you believe that?
Do you believe me?
I think I do.

I love you, Betty.

I love you too, Archie.

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