Scarecrow and Mrs. King (1983) s01e17 Episode Script

The Artful Dodger

[DOGS BARKING.]
[BEEPING.]
[LOCK WHIRRING.]
GRANGER: Can't I go ahead and clock in and then? SERGEANT: No.
GRANGER: Well, forget it.
I'm late.
SERGEANT: I'm sorry, but GRANGER: You know how far it is to Parking Lot S? SERGEANT: I'm sorry, Mr.
Granger, but you know the rules.
GRANGER: Everybody knows I work here.
I've worked here for 18 years! I've got see a security badge.
I left the damn security badge in my other jacket.
SERGEANT: I'm sorry, but I have orders.
What's this big deal about a rinky-dink piece of plastic? I have orders to Strict orders I cannot deviate from.
GRANGER: Can't I go ahead and clock in and then? SERGEANT: No, you don't understand.
I cannot let GRANGER: Well, forget it.
Just forget it.
[FOOTSTEPS APPRO ACHING.]
[ALARM BUZZING.]
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
AMANDA: Coming.
- Does this look all right? AMANDA: You look wonderful.
Maybe I should have worn a full skirt.
Gerald loves to dip.
I'm positive.
You look beautiful, just beautiful.
- You look divine, dear.
- Thank you.
"Divine" is not a word I generally use, but your mother is absolutely right.
- Hi, Alan.
- Hi.
- Sorry I'm late.
- That's all right.
You get two points for calling and two for the flowers.
- They're beautiful.
- Four points in one evening.
- Hello, Mrs.
West.
- Hello, Alan.
You come in the kitchen with me while I put them in water.
I thought you might be Gerald.
He's coming with the sitter.
And don't you apologize for being late.
I mean, Gerald makes a point of being 15 minutes early.
Which is terribly unnerving.
Usually leaves me with my hair half-combed.
- You look wonderful.
- Oh, thank you.
Well, it's big-band night at the Officer's Club.
Oh, they don't write music you can dance to anymore.
Oh, I tell you.
Well, of course, you wouldn't remember that.
No, of course not.
I'm much too young to remember Harry James and Count Basie.
Artie Shaw.
- You do.
- In my apartment in Paris I have a collection of all the original Ellington sides.
Oh, that's heaven.
That's Duke Ellington, Amanda.
- Who, Mother? - Duke Ellington.
AMANDA: Who? - Duke! Duke Ellingt Mother, I know that.
I practically teethed on your old Glenn Miller seventy-eights.
DOTTY: Little Brown Jug.
Ha, ha.
I still have that.
I don't play it anymore.
I mean, those little teeth marks in those grooves Well, they give me happy memories, but I wanna tell you something.
Now it's all video rock or whatever they call it.
There is just no romance.
Well, I wouldn't say there is no romance, Mrs.
West.
You know, I'm afraid if I keep postponing it I know, I know.
I'm sorry.
Go ahead.
I don't wanna keep you.
Uh, maybe next time you could come early and we'll talk about your records.
And your lovely art collection.
I would love to see that.
You don't have etchings or anything like that? - Oh, no, nothing like that.
- Mother, Alan doesn't collect art he sells it.
- Oh, I see.
- Paintings, sculpture.
- I see.
That's better.
I mean, it's much more active.
Ha, ha.
Oh, go on.
I don't want to keep you.
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye, Mother.
- I love you.
- You too.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Oh, he's so cute.
BILLY: And you say the security system was in place? Sentries, television scanners? Of course.
It was all by the book.
And you people wrote that book.
- It was your security plan.
- Couldn't be.
One of our jobs is designing security.
We have never had a breakdown, not at Landover, not You damn sure had a breakdown here.
Now, you got a man killed, Stetson.
We have a dead man because of you people.
Somebody walked through here, right through your security and trotted out with one-third of the MAB System, gentlemen.
One-third, Stetson.
You get your birdseed wholesale? Lee, back off.
We have to work with these people.
MAB System? You telling us that someone's got plans to our Mobile Anti-Ballistic System? That's right, our umbrella defense against enemy missiles.
Now, the total MAB System is on three large sheets of special plastic.
- Lf - Three sheets of plastic.
MORGAN: Now this isn't MAB, but it's similar enough.
The entire system is too sensitive to put in one packet so we have it on the three separate covers.
This was Cover 1.
So, what happens here? This one lays over another piece of plastic which lays over another? That tells the whole picture, the three sheets, read together? Who leaked that to you, Stetson? It isn't really tough to figure out when you consider what we do for a living.
Where are the other two pieces? Cover 2 is at Fort Belvedere, Cover 3's at Morrison Missile Depot.
Now, Cover 1 unfortunately will give the Russians a fairly specific area to photograph from their satellites.
Covers 2 and 3 pinpoint exactly where our anti-ballistic missiles will be at any given time.
- They could knock out our entire umbrella.
- Absolutely.
To relocate would take 18 months.
We'd be vulnerable the whole time to a first strike.
Because of your foul-up in security.
Look, you said that nothing else in that safe was disturbed, right? What's that got to do with it? Someone had very specific information.
They went straight to Cover 1.
He didn't search.
Of course he went straight to it.
God knows how many times he's waltzed through here before.
Or it could have been an inside job all along.
Are you saying this is an Army screw-up? I'm saying if MAB's system has been compromised let's find out how and why and save the name-calling till later.
Now, who was on duty when this went down? Uh, l I don't have that man's name right off, general.
Get the man's name, Sykes.
These men will want to talk to him.
Yes, why don't you do that, Sykes? Yes, sir, general.
Right away.
All right, Melrose, conduct your investigation but get into it and get it done.
I want answers.
We'll do our best.
I've seen your best.
This time I wanna see results.
Where have I gone wrong? I've been trying all evening to dazzle you and you simply refuse to be dazzled.
Oh, no, I don't mean to You know, I just [SIGHS.]
This is a lovely restaurant.
It was written up in the Food section of the paper.
They even had some recipes Changing the subject's not gonna help.
I'm very persistent.
- Now, who is he? - Who is who? The man.
There must be a man.
There must be somebody who's, uh, more attentive than I am who's better-Iooking and who has a deadlier aftershave.
- Ha, ha.
- What's his name? No, there isn't anybody.
No, there really isn't.
There's nobody special in my life.
I see, you know, uh, a few people and that's Here.
Maybe this will help improve my rating.
- What is it? - Open it.
- Impressed? - Oh, yeah.
ALAN: Moderately impressed? - No, no, very impressed.
Very impressed.
I had that made for you.
- For me? - Mm-hm.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
No, I couldn't take that.
It's only a copy.
In the clothing trade, they call that a knockoff.
The original is in the Topkapi Museum.
You know what that is? - Ha, ha, it's a ring.
- No, it's a very special ring, Amanda.
Some people call it a harem ring, others call it a concubine ring.
- A concubine ring? - Amanda, don't read anything into it.
I wouldn't read anything into it.
Boy Scouts wear Boy Scout rings and graduates wear graduate rings.
It's beautiful, Amanda.
I deal in beauty, remember? Now, how long have we known each other? Two weeks? - Two, two weeks.
- Yeah.
Okay, in all that time, you've allowed me some companionable handholding uh, one very noncommittal kiss at the front door.
Can you think that I would consider you in the concubine department? [CHUCKLES.]
I want you to wear that ring.
Now, you said I'm nice.
I'm not nice.
I am devious.
I want you to wear that ring because it's beautiful, so you wear it.
And when you're wearing it, you're gonna think of me and I really want you to think of me.
- Look at it this way.
We're friends? - Yes.
Good.
[LAUGHS.]
Now, because we're friends, and I'd like to be a lot more accept it for what it is.
It's a gesture of friendship.
It's a It's a It's a friendship ring.
- A friendship ring.
Sure.
- Mm-hm.
That's it.
- Nothing more than that, no strings.
- No strings.
Zero.
Zero strings.
Well, I'll just see if it fits.
- Try it on.
- It fits.
- It's supposed to.
It's beautiful.
Well, uh - I'll wear it on one condition.
- What's that? You have to explain it to my mother.
LEE: It just doesn't figure out.
Perimeter sentries are in 50-yard turnarounds.
There are 16 TV scanners on overlap rotation.
We've got coded key boxes on every - George, do you mind? - Nope.
You're not bothering me, Lee.
When was the last time you found a bug in a blueprint? Scarecrow, go ahead.
What's your point? My point is nothing.
Nobody could get past that system.
It has to be an inside number, not a security breakdown.
The Army is trying to dump it on us, Billy.
Tell that to Colonel Sykes.
Maybe I can do better than that.
Maybe I can prove it.
Now, tonight Francine and l No, I'm on the Kerensky thing tonight.
All right, then let me have Jenny Chang.
Morel, Leftwich, anybody.
I just need somebody with some smarts that can run a stopwatch and a microfilm machine.
- You're all clear, Mr.
Melrose.
- Thank you.
Listen, you can forget Chang, forget Morel.
Are you sure you don't want Fred Fielder? Are you sure you want me to answer that with a lady present? You said somebody with smarts, right? Wh? Oh.
No, no, no, I am I am talking about agents, not civilians.
You need somebody to run security backgrounds on civilian employees, right? Isn't that why we're talking microfilm machine? I hear Fred runs a dynamite microfilm machine, Lee.
[CHUCKLES.]
- Hello, everybody.
- Hi.
I hope I'm not interrupting right in the middle of some, uh, secret mission um, but I have, uh, have this.
- What is that? - It's from Payroll, my hours last week.
It needs your signature so it can go to General Accounting then it goes on up to Accounting then after that I think it goes to - Amanda, just bring it here.
Yes, sir.
Thank you very much, sir.
Right there, that bottom is Thank you.
I think it's, uh, 11 hours and maybe 15 minutes Fine, fine.
Whatever.
Ahem, Lee has something you can help with this evening.
Well, uh Oh, well, um, I - I'm afraid I can't tonight, I'm - No, look Look, if you're busy Ooh, Amanda, dear, is that why you're busy tonight? [CHUCKLES.]
Very busy, apparently.
Hmm? Amanda, do you know what that is? Yes, it's a, um It's a friendship ring.
- No, it's a concubine ring.
- It isn't, it's a friendship ring.
There's whole a collection of them in the Topkapi Museum.
- I know that for a fact.
- Yes, I know that.
It's a friendship ring.
It was given to me by a friend and therefore it is simply a friendship ring.
FRANCINE: Okay.
Sure.
Friendship.
[CHUCKLES.]
Sir, I could, uh, rearrange my schedule and change my plans if you need me.
No.
You've got a heavy date, forget it.
- I don't have a heavy date.
- No, really.
Who gave you that ring? Oh, I don't think you should ask me a personal question like that.
- I wasn't being personal.
- Especially here.
[AMANDA AND LEE ARGUING.]
Amanda.
Scarecrow.
Scarecrow! Amanda! Listen! Yes, sir.
I'm sorry.
Scarecrow, I've got just two words for you: Fred Fielder.
- How about 7:30? - I'll help you.
Good.
Now, if you'll just stop blindsiding each other and go get some concrete evidence that this PWAC thing isn't our fault - Excuse me, sir, what is a "peewack"? - PWAC.
Potomac Weapons and Armament Center.
- PWAC, okay? AMANDA: Okay.
Don't worry about it.
I've got a few ideas already.
You better.
If this business turns out to be our mess-up and it gets kicked upstairs, you know what that means.
- Iceland? - Iceland if we're lucky.
And national security goes down the drain.
- No trouble, then? - None at all.
This Mrs.
King I don't quite understand how you came upon her.
Why she's so valuable to you.
- We're curious about Mrs.
King, are we? - No.
Heh.
- Interested.
- Well, actually, you're responsible.
Your people gave me the agent responsible for security at PWAC.
Lee Stetson.
I did a little surveillance.
I found out that Mrs.
King is seen with him quite often.
She seemed to be my best link to him so I, uh I arranged things.
- She's not an agent? - She's an innocent.
Then what possible use can she be to you? You hired me for my expertise, Claude.
Why don't you depend on it? Because I don't quite understand.
You don't have to understand.
Don't clutter up your mind, Claude.
It's bad for the concentration.
As you can see, it's, uh, four moves to mate.
What about the other Pliofilms? One is of very little use.
We must have all three.
You'll have them.
You'll have all three.
With Mrs.
King's help, if it makes you feel better.
Mrs.
King is helping you? I couldn't do it without her.
I think it's really exciting, but I wish you'd told me you were going.
I didn't know there was another Ghiberti in Italy until I got the phone call.
Well, I'm sorry I have to break our date for tonight.
- It's him, isn't it, this 7:30 appointment? - "Him"? This man, this man that you, uh, that you won't tell me about? No, the 7:30 is a man, but it's, uh It's just It's business.
- Just business, huh? - Yes.
I'm sorry, it's none of my business.
Uh, I really should give you back your ring if you're going away.
Are you saying you don't want my friendship? Oh, no.
No, I'm not saying that at all, you've been You're very nice.
Keep it, will you? It's very important to me that I know that you're wearing it.
I'm sorry my business is going so well.
I'd like to spend more time with you.
I like to spend time with you too, Alan.
- Will you do something while I'm away? - Mm-hm.
What? Will you wear that ring and think of me every now and then? Another thing too.
This 7:30 appointment tonight keep it business.
- Business.
[CHUCKLES.]
Well, you haven't told me if I'm dressed properly for the job.
- You're fine.
- You said warm and comfortable something I could move in and I'm very warm and comfortable, can move in this.
- And you haven't told me what the job is.
- Exactly what I say.
- Exactly what you say.
- Right.
Do you think you could be more specific? I don't want you to tell me anything that's top-secret or anything that I'm not cleared to know but I can probably be a little more helpful if - Do you know how to run a stopwatch? - Yes.
- Do you know how to count? - I can count.
All right.
That's what you do.
You run a stopwatch and you count.
I run a stopwatch and count.
I'm not disappointed.
If the agency thinks it's important that I run a stopwatch and count then I'll run a stopwatch and count.
Amanda, believe me.
This is important.
- It is? - Yes.
I'm gonna try to prove that the agency didn't set up a faulty security system at PWAC, all right? Heh! Well, of course they didn't.
I mean, that's your job.
You set up security systems, you catch spies, you protect the country.
And nobody does it better.
Nobody.
And I'd like to see somebody prove that they could.
Well, thank you.
[CHUCKLES.]
It's, uh, kind of nice to have a vote of confidence now and then.
I mean it.
And you're right, it is important, it's very important.
It's more than just clearing our name in this.
Somebody got through that system.
Somehow.
We've gotta find him before he causes any more damage than he already has.
We have to stop him.
Okay.
Two sentries.
The scanner has to already be past this hedge.
- Right.
- Give me a count.
Okay.
Get ready.
Go, go.
We see the woman, but we don't see Stetson.
[LAUGHING.]
It's marvelous.
[DOOR BUZZES.]
Okay, Wally.
Yeah, the guard's desk is right next to the vault door.
They can see any move I make.
[WHISPERING.]
You were right.
Nobody can do it.
Yeah, unless Amanda, there's something I want you to do.
- Okay, Newton.
- Good night.
Uh, hello, excuse me.
I was wondering if I could ask you a question.
Of course, Mrs.
King.
Is there a drinking fountain around here anywhere? - Yes, ma'am.
Uh, you go right down - Sergeant the, uh, the question was addressed to me.
You go down this, uh, corridor to the first intersecting hallway.
It's about halfway down.
Uh, excuse me, but when I get down to that hallway do I turn right or do I turn left and which way? - You turn right.
- I go right and follow the corridor Right, right, right.
And Mr.
Stetson, is he inside the building as well? - Uh, right here, colonel.
AMANDA: Uh, well [AMANDA & LEE CHUCKLING.]
I, uh I got this in the vault.
Slot 36 if you want to put it back in.
- Then you did get in.
- Oh, yeah.
I got in.
Yeah, he was really good, like a cat burglar.
[CHUCKLES.]
Sounds very much like, uh, you've just proved your own lovely theory, Stetson.
The hell I did.
I got in on this.
Security plan for the entire complex.
Now, did our night visitor have the same thing and if he did, where did he get it? How would I know? Ha, ha.
You're the expert.
Well, maybe you can answer this.
It's a lot easier.
Where's your microfilm room? AMANDA: Finnegan, Gorlick, Gorsham.
Granger, J.
C.
There he is.
LEE: Good.
Let's see.
Uh, prior occupation: U.
S.
Navy.
Crypto clearance [IN UNISON.]
PWAC 66, machine operator.
Everything checks.
If everything checks, why are we checking him? You said that he seemed to have the perfect alibi for not having a badge.
Well, "seemed.
" That is the word, "seemed.
" The truth is when I talked to him, he had too slick an alibi too many cover stories.
You know, his parking place, his car, his wife, personal problems.
How do you check personal problems? I don't know, you could check his employment history and work record.
Uh, let's see.
"See file 1667B.
" Yeah, well, there's nothing in his background history that looks hinky.
Let's see, uh, dishonorable discharge, computer certification Argh! I don't know.
Zero.
[SIGHS.]
But how did somebody get by the guard's desk without the sergeant being distracted? I couldn't.
No, Granger had to be part of the operation.
I know it was a tap dance, but How do you prove it? There you go.
Granger, J.
C.
LEE: It's more of the same thing.
"Departmental citation, October 27th 1980.
" Medical leaves in '67, '71, '74 and '79.
Heart condition.
- Heart condition.
- Oh, forget that.
Find something really interesting like spy school, Moscow, '79 and '80.
Wait a minute.
If he had a heart condition, isn't that kind of a clue? Uh-uh.
Uh, my father My ex-father-in-law had a heart condition.
And they told him to exercise.
You know, they said, "Walk briskly, Jack.
Exercise, exercise.
" - Thanks for the family history, but - Don't you see what I'm saying? Didn't he become angry because he had to park so far? - Yeah.
- All right.
Then if he did why did he request they change his parking space to Lot S from Lot C, which is a lot closer.
You see that? Yes, I did.
Request granted in '79.
It coincides with his medical leave.
I don't know what it means.
I'll tell you what it means.
It means he blew his little alibi.
[DIALING PHONE.]
Yeah, sergeant, this is Stetson.
Would you have Mr.
J.
C.
Granger step in here for a minute? All right, I'll hold.
He's calling Granger's department.
Yeah.
He isn't? He didn't? Okay, thank you.
- What? - He didn't show tonight.
Grab an address off of one of those things, huh? [AMANDA GRO ANS.]
[AMANDA SIGHS.]
Come on, come on.
- Lee? - What? Rushing me will make me nervous.
[WHISTLING.]
Whistling is rushing.
[SIGHS.]
[KNOCKS ON DOOR.]
Not home.
Right.
Oh, Lee, do you really think you ought to break into Mr.
Granger's apartment? Sure, I can break in.
Just watch me.
Let's see, that one.
I had a feeling.
Yeah.
This is really pretty spooky.
In movies when you do this, somebody jumps out of the closet.
- There's a body hanging from the rafters.
- Oh, Amanda.
- It's breaking and entering.
- It's not breaking.
Just entering.
Come on.
The guy's probably not even here.
He's probably in Rio with a suitcase full of cash.
Oh.
So much for the movies.
Uh, Mr.
Granger.
Mr.
Granger? [CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING ON HEADPHONES.]
He's not asleep, is he? He's dead.
Yeah.
And so is the one lead we had as to who's ripping off our entire missile-defense system.
Well, how do you like the idea of America as a sitting duck? Is it that bad? It's that bad.
BILLY: How long had he been dead? - The coroner said about 10.
- Am I right, Amanda? - Um, between 9 and 10:30.
He said that from the degree of rigidity - No, that's enough.
Forget the rest, huh? - Thank you.
You see where this is pointing, don't you? - The Dodger.
LEE: You got it.
AMANDA: The Dodger? What? - What? Dodger? Used to be a cat burglar working Monaco, Costa del Sol, places like that.
When the rich switched to paste jewelry, he switched to military secrets.
The murder fits his M.
O.
He uses informants, offers them a ton of money, and then kills them.
Well, then, if it was this Dodger Excuse me, sir, um, but is that his name? Dodger? No, Dodger.
That's how Interpol catalogs him, okay? - Oh, sorry.
- You called the COs at Belvedere and And Morrison.
Sykes spoke with both men, right, Sykes? Yes, sir.
I told them about our theft and your suggestion that they change our setup.
- To what? - To Alpha System.
- Change it again.
- I will not.
Alpha is a perfectly good system.
Yes, it's a perfectly good system and a day old.
Look, if the Dodger had Granger at PWAC he's got people at Belvedere and Morrison.
One day is hardly enough time for anyone MORGAN: Colonel Sykes.
[MORGAN SIGHS.]
What do you say, Melrose? Scarecrow's right.
If it's Dodger, he would have people in both places.
Well, do we have a secure telephone line? - The gray one.
- Uh, here you are.
There you go.
Yes, General Morgan, PWAC, put me through to General Deardoff.
MORGAN [O VER SPEAKER.]
: Phil, Titus Morgan here.
I'm at the agency with Melrose and Stetson.
We're concerned about your security at Belvedere.
Sure, I know it's only been a day, Phil but, well, it's shaping up that our thief had an inside man and Melrose feels that if we did, that you could too.
Right.
Right, Phil.
Well, if I were you, I'd go to Code Whiskey- Zebra pronto.
I'd double my Security shifts as of, uh, 800.
Okay, good.
Sounds good to me too.
Now, I'll call Red over at Morrison and tell him the same thing, same code.
Right.
Okay, bye.
[ALARM BUZZING.]
Somebody shut off that damn siren.
All right, now somebody tell me just when it turned up missing.
The report is due soon.
WOMAN: Yeah, well, I'm getting around to it.
I must say, your performance so far has been remarkable.
You say that rather grudgingly, Claude.
Do you have a complaint? No complaint, no, but very deep concern.
The two Pliofilms are valueless without the third.
With our break-in at Fort Belvedere, I don't see how you're gonna secure it.
You're paying me money to insure that it is possible.
Ha, ha.
A very great deal.
Compromising the security of a nation as technologically advanced as this should be considered a bargain at any price.
You have no loyalties, have you? On the contrary, I have very strong and specific loyalties to myself.
Now, national boundaries, ideologies, they change with political climate.
I'm a practical man, Claude.
I like security and I happened to find it in a numbered Swiss bank account.
Now, you're free to feel as morally superior to me as it pleases you just as long as you pay me in cash.
- On delivery.
- On delivery, yes, of course.
As we agreed.
Now, if you'll excuse me I've got a little eavesdropping to do.
Cairo.
Cairo.
Then Iran? Would you please get that thing out of my face? Just your friendly neighborhood exterminator doing my job.
Well, some of us don't have bugs, dear.
Lee, the latest intel has the Artful Dodger in Cairo or maybe Iran.
Your intel doesn't know what he's talking about.
Come in.
No, sir, I agree.
If he had PWAC and Belvedere we gotta come up with something else.
Right, general.
I'll talk to you later.
That was Deardoff.
Before that was Morgan.
The whole Army's gone on alert.
You didn't see tanks in the street? No.
But we did check out Belvedere.
- Same deal? - It's close enough.
- It's our old friend.
- This time he hadn't killed anybody.
Yeah, not for a whole day.
What do you know? Okay.
Here's the plan.
As of five minutes ago Cover 3 is being moved.
- Good.
To where? BILLY: To Fort Keneally.
They've got a 20-truck convoy moving out right about now.
To Fredericksburg.
- Won't the Dodger just follow it? - Good, that's what we want him to do.
And Cover 3 won't be in the convoy? It'll be going out the back gate in a mail truck.
AMANDA [ON SPEAKER.]
: A what? BILLY: A regular ordinary mail truck.
AMANDA: With letters and postcards? BILLY: And two paratroopers armed to the teeth dressed in Post Office-issue clothes.
They'll have two jeeps, full Rangers on parallel streets and they'll be monitored all the way on Army Tac 3 frequency.
Pretty tight operation.
All right.
You just let our boy try to figure that one out.
They'll be taking regular streets, probably 16th and traveling in a normal Uh-huh.
And while it's heading to Keneally the convoy will be heading out somewhere.
- That's great.
AMANDA: Hmm.
[DEVICE CLICKING.]
We're getting something here.
Amanda, what have you got on you? Nothing.
Just my friendship ring.
I'm sorry, I had no idea.
BILLY: It's worse than we thought.
The mail truck's already on the road.
Morgan said he'd hop on the radio and try to reel them in.
An Army Tac 3? An Army Tac 3? Good luck.
Man, it is unreal, it is absolutely unreal.
The guy uses a civilian to get our info.
He knows everything that we know.
- Lee, I'm really sorry - "Sorry"? Sorry, sorry, sorry.
What good does that do us, huh? BILLY: All right, stow it, Scarecrow.
I, uh I am sorry.
That's all right.
Amanda, do you have a location on this Alan Squires? You got a phone number? Shouldn't we turn a radio on or something, sir? No, this is called "white noise.
" It blocks out any signal.
Nobody can hear us now.
Where do we find this guy? I'll tell you where.
You're gonna find him on the roof of that phony mail truck walking off with the third sheet of the Pliofilm.
He is gonna have the whole ball of wax unless we stop him right now.
All right.
I'll put an APB out on that Rolls-Royce and then we'll hit the streets.
- All right, let's move.
- You are staying.
AMANDA: I'm the one who knows what Alan looks like.
- She's right.
- I'm right.
[FIRST RADIO CLICKS.]
[EASY LISTENING MUSIC PLAYING OUT OF SECOND RADIO.]
Top Dog to Pony Express, listen up.
This is a recall.
Repeat, this is a recall.
[EASY LISTENING MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO.]
Why am I getting music? Terrific.
We're on this top-drawer mission and we get elevator music.
[EASY LISTENING MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO.]
I'm gonna try Vermont.
Cut across to 16th.
- What did the general say? - Road blocks at the bridge and agency vehicles are running parallels.
I can't believe I jeopardized the security of the United States.
It just doesn't seem possible.
Nobody's blaming you, Amanda.
The Dodger's a very sharp operator.
- How did he arrange to meet you? - He didn't.
I don't think he did.
It was an accident.
His car stalled when I was shopping I don't believe this.
I don't believe it.
So we got out and we were talking while we waited for the car club and he seemed nice and friendly and - Oh, yeah, and he picked you up.
- He did not pick me up.
- He did not give you a phone number.
- No, he didn't.
He always called me.
Heh, and that didn't tip you off? Oh, come on, Amanda.
Married guys and weirdos, they don't give you phone numbers.
He is not married.
At least, I don't think he is.
And he didn't seem like a weirdo.
He seemed nice.
He had a Rolls-Royce with French license plates on it and impeccable manners.
I mean, he had the most impeccable manners.
Ah, a guy in a Rolls convertible gives you a ring and a great line and you go for it.
- Just terrific.
- I said I was sorry.
Yeah, well, we are gonna be a hell of a lot sorrier if he pulls this off.
[SIGHS.]
[JACKHAMMER DRILLING NEARBY.]
Must be some kind of work going on up there.
Think they'll ever finish this town? [CHUCKLES.]
[JACKHAMMER DRILLING.]
Where the hell is that garbage truck think it's going? Hey, that sucker thinks [JEEP SCREECHING.]
[COUGHING.]
Home Plate, this is Lancer.
You have any traffic for me on mail delivery? WOMAN [O VER RADIO.]
: Negative, Lancer.
This is Home Plate.
AMANDA: Hold it.
Wait.
There's Alan.
[TIRES SCREECHING.]
- All right, now you stay here.
AMANDA: I will.
[GUNSHOT.]
[GUNSHOTS.]
Reloading.
- All right, ready? - Ready.
[FOOTSTEPS APPRO ACHING.]
Damn it! I can't get a clean shot.
Here.
You gotta be kidding, Scarecrow.
Come on, it's the quickest way down, Billy.
[AIR HISSING.]
[FOOTSTEPS APPRO ACHING.]
LEE: All right, hold it.
And drop the piece right there.
[BOTH GRUNTING.]
Oh! [GRUNTS.]
[LEE GRUNTS.]
Up and slow, buddy.
Up and slow.
AMANDA: Oh.
Oh, my gosh.
[GRO ANS.]
- Oh, watch it.
Watch it.
- Oh.
Oh.
Do I have any teeth left? - Oh, good.
- Ooh.
AMANDA: Your poor jaw.
LEE: Heh.
AMANDA: I feel really terrible.
We didn't have to go out tonight.
And especially we didn't have to come here.
This is very expensive.
Expense, that's the least of my problems.
[CHUCKLES.]
[CLEARS THRO AT.]
Would you like a straw? Uh, no.
No, uh, a straw wouldn't look right with soup.
You know, I can't sit here and eat a steak and watch you while you're in such pain.
I feel fine, Amanda.
Really.
I do.
Uh, no pain.
- Okay.
- All right? Yeah.
Lee? Hmm? Is, um Is this sort of, you know, an apology? An apology? Well, for anything that you might have said sort of in the heat of the moment and so you invited me to dinner to - Wait, wait.
What are you talking about? I eat here all the time.
The maître d' called you Mr.
Schuson.
[AMANDA CHUCKLES.]
Well, okay, so he's new.
I'm only trying to say that if it is an apology, it isn't necessary.
I mean, I know that I almost got you and the whole Army in a lot of trouble and you have a right to be angry.
No, uh, I wasn't angry.
Well, if you had been and if you had said a few things that you didn't mean and then if you thought that maybe you'd like to sort of, you know, apologize and so you invited me to dinner I just want you to know that I understand and I would think that would be really nice.
- Good.
- Does that mean it is? - Is what? - An apology.
[SIGHS.]
Okay, if you want to put it like that, yes, it was an apology.
Thank you.
[BOTH SIGH.]
Would you like your Jell-O now?
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