Search Party (2016) s05e04 Episode Script
Leviticus
Hello, everyone.
I thought I'd make this video while in the bath because lately I've been feeling, well, naked.
I've been working on something that's been taking up a lot of my time.
And I'm about to apply myself more than I ever have in my entire life.
I've fully aligned with my purpose.
And I can't wait to share the news with you.
But the timing isn't quite right.
But what I can tell you is that it is going to directly affect the existence of you and everyone you've ever met.
This is going to be irreversible.
But don't be scared.
This is a mission of Lyte.
Well, look at you, all sexy and enlightened.
That's me.
You know, Portia, I really have to thank you for pushing me to do this endeavor.
It's gonna be the biggest thing since sliced bread.
And I owe it all to you.
Dory, I can't tell you how much that means to me.
I wish we could just melt into the same person.
Why can't we do that? Can we just invent that already? One thing at a time.
Hey.
Do you want to get dinner with me tonight? There's this really cute spot, and it has outdoor seating and gorgeous lighting.
That sounds lovely.
But let's see how the day plays out, okay? Yeah.
Yeah, we'll just see how the day plays out.
I love that 'cause it's kind of being present and Should I make a rez? Thank you.
Oh, wow.
- Nice, right? - Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
This isn't bad.
No, it's like super sexy.
- Yeah, of course.
- Thank you so much.
Oh, course.
Yeah.
You know, I like to treat you like the princess that you are.
Uh, Joe.
There's something that I really need to tell you and I feel, like, really nervous to say it.
Okay.
No, hey, hey.
Look, you know you can tell me anything, right? I'm I'm your supportive lover.
I just want you to know, like, you really mean so much to me and, like, I think I'm kind of seeing someone.
Like, I don't want to say too much about it because, you know, it's really new to me in a lot of ways.
But, um, yeah.
Wow.
I'm um - I'm actually relieved.
- What? I may be kinda seeing someone too.
- You? - Yeah, it's complicated.
- Oh, my God.
- I'm just trying to process it 'cause it's actually extremely confusing.
And I have a lot of conflicting feelings about it, but I hope I get to meet her one day.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
Yeah, you too.
- Yeah.
I hope he makes you really happy.
Oh! Wow! Oh, wow.
Oh, my gosh.
Ah, this is it.
This is it.
Yes, this is where we're gonna do it.
This is our new home.
- Yeah, yeah.
- God, this is so perfect.
This is just exactly what it should be.
- You know, I told them.
- I said I don't want offices.
You know, no divisions, no secrets.
Just community.
Oh, ah, my best friends.
Isn't this place of the times? I got the design team from Selfie Castle.
Doesn't it just make you want to take a million pictures of yourself? That is so smart.
People are just gonna be so jealous that we get to, like, sit and, like, stand in here.
Hey, you want to see the, um, lab? The lab? Yes.
God, it sounds so cool to hear it.
- Yeah.
- It's so cool to hear.
Yeah.
The lab.
Oh, boy.
Here we go, the lab.
Everybody, this is our resident genius Dr.
Benny Balthazar.
Hi.
- Hello.
- Hi.
Hi.
Very excited to be making history.
Yeah.
Benny graduated first in her class at MIT.
It doesn't get more science-y than Benny.
Oh, my God.
MIT.
That's actually one of the schools I consider pretending to go to, so.
- Oh, yes.
- I read about your lies.
Oh, thank you.
Well, Benny, it is an honor to embark on this journey with you.
Yeah, it's gonna be huge.
Well, do you mind showing us what y'all are up to? Sure.
So, obviously, we're gonna start with targeted amplicon sequencing.
Of course, obviously.
And then x-ray crystallography.
We'll see where that gets us.
So we have the most sophisticated technology in here.
Equipment that some of the most well-funded labs in the world don't have access to.
This is the most comprehensive library of natural and synthetic chemical samples that the world has ever seen.
You could do absolutely anything with these.
If there's a way to cure cancer, it's in here.
Oh, well, that would have come in handy when I pretended to have cancer.
Nobody is allowed in there ever.
In the wrong hands, this could start World War III.
So we are using a new technology that visually maps neurochemical reactions as they're occurring live in our test subject.
We're looking for anything traditionally associated with enlightenment.
The idea being that we can reverse engineer the chemical recipe for what you experienced.
Hmm.
I'm sorry, but this doesn't feel quite right to me.
To reduce my experience to just chemicals.
What I went through was so much more than that.
It was spiritual, metaphysical, divine.
I died.
And then I came back.
That's what the pill should be doing.
Yeah, well, uh, we'll look into that.
- Oh, hey, thank you.
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Hi, Kate.
Hi, Jose.
Welcome.
Try everything.
I liked the soda pop.
I like the cherries.
They're all good.
I'm sorry.
Do we own this candy store too? Oh, we don't own it.
No, they shut it down when I come in 'cause I think best when I got in candy me.
I, in fact, I'm micro-dosing sugar.
Dor, Dor! They have my favorite candy from when I was a kid and they're really impossible to find.
- They got everything here.
- Okay.
Um, I I I think what we're essentially trying to do is to reinvent the wheel.
Uh, so it could take the science a heck of a long time before it sees the light of day.
So the question becomes, what are we gonna do in the meantime? Research.
And meditate.
- Hmm.
- No.
We get people on board.
We get them lining up around the block and, uh, just Just clamoring for it.
Like, shouldn't we make a pill first? No, I think we need to create the need before the technology.
- See what I'm thinking? - Mm-hmm.
I think we need to pull some kind of, you know, magic trick so that we hypnotize the entire country into joining our cause.
And I know how to do it.
We're gonna do it through a a kind of a stunt.
Here.
Come here.
Come around here.
Come close.
Get in a little tight, a little tight, a little grouping.
Stay right there.
- That's good.
- Now - All right.
- Cast your gaze right about from where you are right around there.
- Okay.
- Watch this.
Bing.
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
You guys, it's like the future we've all been waiting for.
So what is this that we're looking at exactly? Well, this is a very carefully curated group of the most popular social media influencers whose followership adds up to collectively about a third of the American population.
They're just fantastic.
So watch.
I'm gonna isolate this lady right there.
- Oh, my God.
- I know who that is.
She looks, like, very hot in skates.
That's exactly what men want.
And then there's this fella.
Oh, yeah, that's the pop scientist.
He's like a joke in the legitimate science community.
Well, he's very likable.
- No.
- Here's the whole group again.
Wow.
I don't think I recognize any of these people.
But I have very young researchers who assure me that this gang has the attention of basically the entire world.
There we go.
Goodbye.
What do you think of that? Aw! So are you saying that you want these people to promote the pill? - Yeah.
- I want them to promote it.
But also, I want them to be the first to take the pill.
I think this could be a very exciting public example of what the road to enlightenment would look like exactly.
Hmm.
Well, if we did this, I would want to feel connected to these people, you know, to build a relationship with them over time so that I can teach them and love them and really know them so that by the time we actually take the pill, we're like we're like a real a real family.
Like disciples.
- Hmm.
- Hmm.
Yeah.
Imagine a group of influencers living on the premises and live-ing, so to speak, 24/7 from Lyte Headquarters.
They live there? But they look so annoying.
Trust me, we need these folks to be on board.
If they believe, so will everybody.
Oh, my God.
I'm having an idea.
I'm having an idea.
Okay, okay.
Maybe maybe this sounds crazy.
But what if we made it seem like anybody in America could be chosen for this, like a nationwide lottery? Like we act like there's this equal opportunity chance at exclusivity when really it's just pre-selected? - Oh, I love that idea.
- It's patriotic.
Well, it's something to chew on.
Certainly.
You may have noticed an unusual package in your mailbox recently.
That's because tech billionaire and public persona Tunnel Quinn is sending something your way.
Quinn had purported on social media that he had hoped to have every single package delivered to every American by last Wednesday but only 1/5th of the country has received their parcel as the US Postal Service is overwhelmed by this unprecedented situation.
There's an air of mystery around the purpose of this stunt, though Quinn did release this video yesterday.
If there's a light coming out of your box, you've been chosen to be a pioneer who's gonna take us all into a new dawn of human evolution.
Geez, you're gonna want this.
As of today, only two boxes have emitted a shining light, one belonging to fitness personality Dogey Dodge, the other to beauty and cosplay influencer Pepper Southerland.
Which begs the question, is this truly a random selection or are the people being selected social media famous? They want me.
I don't know what it is but they want me! Meanwhile, millions of Americans expressed disappointment as they open their boxes to see nothing but a black void.
And I can say from personal experience, it is quite hurtful to open that empty box.
Oh, my God! Is that Dr.
Richie Thinky? I'm such a fan of yours.
I was so stoked when I saw that you got picked.
My nephews are obsessed with your science experiments.
- Aw! - We that whole, like, baking soda volcano thing that you do in my living room.
- The Big Kaboomer? - Yeah, yeah.
Wow, that must have been messy.
Ugh! I'm so excited to meet you, Elodie on Wheels.
- I'm a huge fan of yours! - Shut up! Is it her? - Is it really her? - Oh, no! You daft little piggy! Where in the fuck have you been? The last time I saw you, I was literally holding your hair back while you were seriously blowing chunks into Angela Merkel's Louis Vuitton clutch at her disco-themed wedding in the Black Forest! - Oh, no.
Take it back.
- Say it's not true! Oh, my God.
- Was she so mad? - Are you kidding me? This is literally the Duchess of Bellhead.
No one's allowed to be mad at her.
That's so fun.
Are you both duchesses? No, I'm PeoplePlacesMarty.
I basically do, like, the most badass stuff with, like, the most badass people on the most badass planet in the entire solar system.
Are you PepperPaintsHerself? Yeah, I am.
And I'm dressed like a dragon today 'cause I'm having heartburn and it feels like fire.
And then I, like, almost wiped.
I just want to butt in and say that I'm getting really strong energy from both of you.
Are you both water signs? - Yes! - Yes.
Yeah, be careful this week, okay? A lot is being asked for you, so don't get too fluid.
Okay.
Thank you.
And I trust anything that you say because I am a huge fan of your weekly readings.
Yeah.
Do me a favor, okay? Don't give me feedback unless I specifically ask for it.
- Kay.
- Hey, did you guys have to fill out a shitload of paperwork for this? Like, why do they need so much of our medical history? I'm starting to get pissed that I don't know a single thing about this.
Hello.
Ah, there you all are! Oh, wow, you're all glowing.
Why don't you all take a seat? Please.
Get comfortable.
I want to welcome all of you.
Hi.
Hi, hi, hi.
Okay.
Well, I'm Dory Sief.
And I am the co-founder of Lyte.
And these are my amazing partners.
You guys want to introduce yourselves? - Hi, you guys.
- I'm Portia Davenport.
I am so excited by this! This is gonna be so fun and amazing.
And I'm here if you guys have any questions at all.
Yay! Hi, I'm Drew Gardner.
Um, I want to thank you all for coming.
And yeah, same.
So if you have any questions, feel free to just shoot 'em my way.
Um, I'm Elliott Goss.
It's so incredible to meet you guys.
And yeah, if you have If you have any questions, you can come to me.
Yes, the dragon.
Yeah, I guess just, like, what is this? Well, you've all been chosen to participate in the single most important experiment of all time.
We've been developing a remedy for anguish and ignorance that is going to enhance the collective human experience.
And we can't do it without you.
You've been selected to be the first pioneers to embark on the quest for enlightenment.
Wait! What? Oh, hell, yes.
I just wanted to give you a little taste of what I'm talking about.
So does anybody want to volunteer and be my little guinea pig? Oh, I will.
- Yes, Elodie.
- Why don't you come up here and join me, sweetie.
- Oh, God.
Okay.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
I actually think I hate all of them.
How many years do you think we're gonna have to know these people? Even more reason to make the pill so we can just fix them all.
- Are you okay? - I'm okay.
So what do you want to work on today? What do you mean? Is there a part of you that feels unaligned in your life? Anything you want to fix? Anything at all? Oh, gosh.
Where do I start? Um, I guess, well, I could use a boyfriend.
- Mmm.
- Ooh.
Great.
So what would a boyfriend do for you? Get me laid.
Sexual connection.
Good.
What else? I I well, I guess I've always been a romantic.
I've always just felt like happiest when I'm in love.
Hmm.
Can I say something that might not make any sense to you? Sure.
You don't want a boyfriend.
Hmm.
Mmm.
I do though.
Consciously, you do.
But when every part of us truly wants something Mm-hmm.
We can manifest it like that.
So the fact that you're sitting up here and you're telling me that you want a boyfriend but you don't have one, it tells me that there's some part of you somewhere that just isn't completely on board.
Mm-hmm.
You're not listening to every part of Elodie.
Would you like to hear what she has to say? Yes, yes.
What does she say? Okay.
Well, I'm going to embody Elodie, so that you two can have a conversation.
How does that sound? Trippy.
Okay.
Why don't you give me your hand, sweetie? Okay.
I think if you get into a relationship, you're gonna mess it up like you always do.
You're gonna scare him away because he's gonna realize how pathetic you really are.
You're unrealized and superficial.
And roller skating is not a point of view.
Is she really channeling right now? Every time you get into a relationship, you get ignored or rejected all over again.
So I'm going to reject every man that comes my way before he has a chance to reject me! So what now? You have to convince me that you're worthy.
Otherwise, you are going to die alone.
Ooh.
Do you see what happened there? We got in touch with the part of Elodie that is in resistance.
You won't acknowledge her power over you.
- Thank you, Elodie.
- Why don't you take a seat? That was amazing.
So here at Lyte, what we're trying to do is heal the wounds that put us in resistance with the things that we need.
That was the first step towards healing that particular trauma because you weren't born with that trauma.
Something happened in your life that fractured you.
We have hundreds of fractures.
It's overwhelming, isn't it? Yeah.
But here's the good news.
We are going to fix all of that.
And we're gonna do it with a small private group.
Just you all, me, Portia, Drew, Elliott, and some of the most well regarded scientists working in our time.
I mean I mean, how does that sound? - Awesome.
- Whoo! Normally, it would take a lifetime to heal all of these wounds.
But we are developing a pill that is 100% backed by science that is going to integrate all the tiny broken pieces of your souls in one fell swoop.
And with all due respect, if she can enlighten you guys, she can enlighten anyone.
I need this.
I have a lot of issues.
This is so messed up.
Do you want to share your thoughts with us, Dogey? Yeah.
I just have a problem with what I just saw.
You didn't become a part of her.
You bullied that girl.
I don't like this one bit.
Is that because maybe you're afraid to do this work? Um, no.
I think it's just all bullshit.
- Nah, man, expand your mind.
- This shit is real.
Ugh, I can't even with how low you vibrate.
Hey, it's okay.
He just has a choice to make.
Do you want to work on yourself and bettering the lives of everyone in the world or do you want to leave? There's a great restaurant right next door if you want to grab a bite on your way home.
Wow.
Fuck you.
Fuck all of this.
I'm Catholic.
He's famously closeted.
- Oh, okay.
- Is there anyone else who is having doubts about this? Because this is not something to take lightly.
This is a huge responsibility.
And you will be dedicating 100% of your lives to this cause.
People may not understand.
Family and partners, they may question you about this.
But that should embolden you because that tells you that their love has always been conditional.
That's an unfortunate truth because even our parents withhold love from us when we don't turn out how they envisioned.
But we will become a family together in our pursuit for unconditional love.
We are voyagers of true love for the betterment of humanity.
And if that is not something that you are interested in, then you're free to leave.
I'm with you.
Me too.
Same.
- I'm in.
- Yeah.
I mean, we have to.
Let's do this! Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
This is a day that I've been looking forward to my entire life.
I just didn't know it.
Every now and again, an innovation comes along that changes everything.
I've been lucky to be at the helm of several of these.
In 1992, I envisioned a world where people could send messages back and forth at the speed of light, allowing everybody to easefully make plans with each other.
I called it texting.
We love texting! And now I bring you the greatest breakthrough in the history of our species, universal enlightenment.
That's right.
And to explain it, I'd like to introduce my friend and business partner.
Together, we've been working on a formula to change the world.
Dory Sief.
Yeah, Dory! - Okay.
- So I don't get a kiss? Hmm.
I believe.
I believe that humankind can not only know love but be love.
That we are intended to transcend consciousness to survive.
Since the dawn of time, we have pined for an era where we reconcile the dilemma of who we are and why we are here and transmute ourselves into absolute peace.
We are evolving.
And we're so thrilled to present the very first to evolve.
These six test subjects were chosen from amongst 210 million Americans and asked to redirect their online presence with a new focus on the quest for enlightenment.
These pioneers are gonna be the first people on the planet to take the pill that's gonna bring about a revolution of love.
And now may I introduce my disciples.
- Whoo! - Whoo! First up, Leonora Hamsdale.
Red Lyte! Marty Plushfeld! Orange Lyte! Winnie Miranda! Yellow Lyte! Pepper Southerland! Green Lyte! Ritchie Thinky! Blue Lyte! Yeah! And Elodie Revlon! Violet Lyte! Yeah! Whoo! Yeah! Hey.
You okay? Yeah.
Yeah, I'm doing fine.
I thought I'd make this video while in the bath because lately I've been feeling, well, naked.
I've been working on something that's been taking up a lot of my time.
And I'm about to apply myself more than I ever have in my entire life.
I've fully aligned with my purpose.
And I can't wait to share the news with you.
But the timing isn't quite right.
But what I can tell you is that it is going to directly affect the existence of you and everyone you've ever met.
This is going to be irreversible.
But don't be scared.
This is a mission of Lyte.
Well, look at you, all sexy and enlightened.
That's me.
You know, Portia, I really have to thank you for pushing me to do this endeavor.
It's gonna be the biggest thing since sliced bread.
And I owe it all to you.
Dory, I can't tell you how much that means to me.
I wish we could just melt into the same person.
Why can't we do that? Can we just invent that already? One thing at a time.
Hey.
Do you want to get dinner with me tonight? There's this really cute spot, and it has outdoor seating and gorgeous lighting.
That sounds lovely.
But let's see how the day plays out, okay? Yeah.
Yeah, we'll just see how the day plays out.
I love that 'cause it's kind of being present and Should I make a rez? Thank you.
Oh, wow.
- Nice, right? - Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
This isn't bad.
No, it's like super sexy.
- Yeah, of course.
- Thank you so much.
Oh, course.
Yeah.
You know, I like to treat you like the princess that you are.
Uh, Joe.
There's something that I really need to tell you and I feel, like, really nervous to say it.
Okay.
No, hey, hey.
Look, you know you can tell me anything, right? I'm I'm your supportive lover.
I just want you to know, like, you really mean so much to me and, like, I think I'm kind of seeing someone.
Like, I don't want to say too much about it because, you know, it's really new to me in a lot of ways.
But, um, yeah.
Wow.
I'm um - I'm actually relieved.
- What? I may be kinda seeing someone too.
- You? - Yeah, it's complicated.
- Oh, my God.
- I'm just trying to process it 'cause it's actually extremely confusing.
And I have a lot of conflicting feelings about it, but I hope I get to meet her one day.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
Yeah, you too.
- Yeah.
I hope he makes you really happy.
Oh! Wow! Oh, wow.
Oh, my gosh.
Ah, this is it.
This is it.
Yes, this is where we're gonna do it.
This is our new home.
- Yeah, yeah.
- God, this is so perfect.
This is just exactly what it should be.
- You know, I told them.
- I said I don't want offices.
You know, no divisions, no secrets.
Just community.
Oh, ah, my best friends.
Isn't this place of the times? I got the design team from Selfie Castle.
Doesn't it just make you want to take a million pictures of yourself? That is so smart.
People are just gonna be so jealous that we get to, like, sit and, like, stand in here.
Hey, you want to see the, um, lab? The lab? Yes.
God, it sounds so cool to hear it.
- Yeah.
- It's so cool to hear.
Yeah.
The lab.
Oh, boy.
Here we go, the lab.
Everybody, this is our resident genius Dr.
Benny Balthazar.
Hi.
- Hello.
- Hi.
Hi.
Very excited to be making history.
Yeah.
Benny graduated first in her class at MIT.
It doesn't get more science-y than Benny.
Oh, my God.
MIT.
That's actually one of the schools I consider pretending to go to, so.
- Oh, yes.
- I read about your lies.
Oh, thank you.
Well, Benny, it is an honor to embark on this journey with you.
Yeah, it's gonna be huge.
Well, do you mind showing us what y'all are up to? Sure.
So, obviously, we're gonna start with targeted amplicon sequencing.
Of course, obviously.
And then x-ray crystallography.
We'll see where that gets us.
So we have the most sophisticated technology in here.
Equipment that some of the most well-funded labs in the world don't have access to.
This is the most comprehensive library of natural and synthetic chemical samples that the world has ever seen.
You could do absolutely anything with these.
If there's a way to cure cancer, it's in here.
Oh, well, that would have come in handy when I pretended to have cancer.
Nobody is allowed in there ever.
In the wrong hands, this could start World War III.
So we are using a new technology that visually maps neurochemical reactions as they're occurring live in our test subject.
We're looking for anything traditionally associated with enlightenment.
The idea being that we can reverse engineer the chemical recipe for what you experienced.
Hmm.
I'm sorry, but this doesn't feel quite right to me.
To reduce my experience to just chemicals.
What I went through was so much more than that.
It was spiritual, metaphysical, divine.
I died.
And then I came back.
That's what the pill should be doing.
Yeah, well, uh, we'll look into that.
- Oh, hey, thank you.
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Hi, Kate.
Hi, Jose.
Welcome.
Try everything.
I liked the soda pop.
I like the cherries.
They're all good.
I'm sorry.
Do we own this candy store too? Oh, we don't own it.
No, they shut it down when I come in 'cause I think best when I got in candy me.
I, in fact, I'm micro-dosing sugar.
Dor, Dor! They have my favorite candy from when I was a kid and they're really impossible to find.
- They got everything here.
- Okay.
Um, I I I think what we're essentially trying to do is to reinvent the wheel.
Uh, so it could take the science a heck of a long time before it sees the light of day.
So the question becomes, what are we gonna do in the meantime? Research.
And meditate.
- Hmm.
- No.
We get people on board.
We get them lining up around the block and, uh, just Just clamoring for it.
Like, shouldn't we make a pill first? No, I think we need to create the need before the technology.
- See what I'm thinking? - Mm-hmm.
I think we need to pull some kind of, you know, magic trick so that we hypnotize the entire country into joining our cause.
And I know how to do it.
We're gonna do it through a a kind of a stunt.
Here.
Come here.
Come around here.
Come close.
Get in a little tight, a little tight, a little grouping.
Stay right there.
- That's good.
- Now - All right.
- Cast your gaze right about from where you are right around there.
- Okay.
- Watch this.
Bing.
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
You guys, it's like the future we've all been waiting for.
So what is this that we're looking at exactly? Well, this is a very carefully curated group of the most popular social media influencers whose followership adds up to collectively about a third of the American population.
They're just fantastic.
So watch.
I'm gonna isolate this lady right there.
- Oh, my God.
- I know who that is.
She looks, like, very hot in skates.
That's exactly what men want.
And then there's this fella.
Oh, yeah, that's the pop scientist.
He's like a joke in the legitimate science community.
Well, he's very likable.
- No.
- Here's the whole group again.
Wow.
I don't think I recognize any of these people.
But I have very young researchers who assure me that this gang has the attention of basically the entire world.
There we go.
Goodbye.
What do you think of that? Aw! So are you saying that you want these people to promote the pill? - Yeah.
- I want them to promote it.
But also, I want them to be the first to take the pill.
I think this could be a very exciting public example of what the road to enlightenment would look like exactly.
Hmm.
Well, if we did this, I would want to feel connected to these people, you know, to build a relationship with them over time so that I can teach them and love them and really know them so that by the time we actually take the pill, we're like we're like a real a real family.
Like disciples.
- Hmm.
- Hmm.
Yeah.
Imagine a group of influencers living on the premises and live-ing, so to speak, 24/7 from Lyte Headquarters.
They live there? But they look so annoying.
Trust me, we need these folks to be on board.
If they believe, so will everybody.
Oh, my God.
I'm having an idea.
I'm having an idea.
Okay, okay.
Maybe maybe this sounds crazy.
But what if we made it seem like anybody in America could be chosen for this, like a nationwide lottery? Like we act like there's this equal opportunity chance at exclusivity when really it's just pre-selected? - Oh, I love that idea.
- It's patriotic.
Well, it's something to chew on.
Certainly.
You may have noticed an unusual package in your mailbox recently.
That's because tech billionaire and public persona Tunnel Quinn is sending something your way.
Quinn had purported on social media that he had hoped to have every single package delivered to every American by last Wednesday but only 1/5th of the country has received their parcel as the US Postal Service is overwhelmed by this unprecedented situation.
There's an air of mystery around the purpose of this stunt, though Quinn did release this video yesterday.
If there's a light coming out of your box, you've been chosen to be a pioneer who's gonna take us all into a new dawn of human evolution.
Geez, you're gonna want this.
As of today, only two boxes have emitted a shining light, one belonging to fitness personality Dogey Dodge, the other to beauty and cosplay influencer Pepper Southerland.
Which begs the question, is this truly a random selection or are the people being selected social media famous? They want me.
I don't know what it is but they want me! Meanwhile, millions of Americans expressed disappointment as they open their boxes to see nothing but a black void.
And I can say from personal experience, it is quite hurtful to open that empty box.
Oh, my God! Is that Dr.
Richie Thinky? I'm such a fan of yours.
I was so stoked when I saw that you got picked.
My nephews are obsessed with your science experiments.
- Aw! - We that whole, like, baking soda volcano thing that you do in my living room.
- The Big Kaboomer? - Yeah, yeah.
Wow, that must have been messy.
Ugh! I'm so excited to meet you, Elodie on Wheels.
- I'm a huge fan of yours! - Shut up! Is it her? - Is it really her? - Oh, no! You daft little piggy! Where in the fuck have you been? The last time I saw you, I was literally holding your hair back while you were seriously blowing chunks into Angela Merkel's Louis Vuitton clutch at her disco-themed wedding in the Black Forest! - Oh, no.
Take it back.
- Say it's not true! Oh, my God.
- Was she so mad? - Are you kidding me? This is literally the Duchess of Bellhead.
No one's allowed to be mad at her.
That's so fun.
Are you both duchesses? No, I'm PeoplePlacesMarty.
I basically do, like, the most badass stuff with, like, the most badass people on the most badass planet in the entire solar system.
Are you PepperPaintsHerself? Yeah, I am.
And I'm dressed like a dragon today 'cause I'm having heartburn and it feels like fire.
And then I, like, almost wiped.
I just want to butt in and say that I'm getting really strong energy from both of you.
Are you both water signs? - Yes! - Yes.
Yeah, be careful this week, okay? A lot is being asked for you, so don't get too fluid.
Okay.
Thank you.
And I trust anything that you say because I am a huge fan of your weekly readings.
Yeah.
Do me a favor, okay? Don't give me feedback unless I specifically ask for it.
- Kay.
- Hey, did you guys have to fill out a shitload of paperwork for this? Like, why do they need so much of our medical history? I'm starting to get pissed that I don't know a single thing about this.
Hello.
Ah, there you all are! Oh, wow, you're all glowing.
Why don't you all take a seat? Please.
Get comfortable.
I want to welcome all of you.
Hi.
Hi, hi, hi.
Okay.
Well, I'm Dory Sief.
And I am the co-founder of Lyte.
And these are my amazing partners.
You guys want to introduce yourselves? - Hi, you guys.
- I'm Portia Davenport.
I am so excited by this! This is gonna be so fun and amazing.
And I'm here if you guys have any questions at all.
Yay! Hi, I'm Drew Gardner.
Um, I want to thank you all for coming.
And yeah, same.
So if you have any questions, feel free to just shoot 'em my way.
Um, I'm Elliott Goss.
It's so incredible to meet you guys.
And yeah, if you have If you have any questions, you can come to me.
Yes, the dragon.
Yeah, I guess just, like, what is this? Well, you've all been chosen to participate in the single most important experiment of all time.
We've been developing a remedy for anguish and ignorance that is going to enhance the collective human experience.
And we can't do it without you.
You've been selected to be the first pioneers to embark on the quest for enlightenment.
Wait! What? Oh, hell, yes.
I just wanted to give you a little taste of what I'm talking about.
So does anybody want to volunteer and be my little guinea pig? Oh, I will.
- Yes, Elodie.
- Why don't you come up here and join me, sweetie.
- Oh, God.
Okay.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
I actually think I hate all of them.
How many years do you think we're gonna have to know these people? Even more reason to make the pill so we can just fix them all.
- Are you okay? - I'm okay.
So what do you want to work on today? What do you mean? Is there a part of you that feels unaligned in your life? Anything you want to fix? Anything at all? Oh, gosh.
Where do I start? Um, I guess, well, I could use a boyfriend.
- Mmm.
- Ooh.
Great.
So what would a boyfriend do for you? Get me laid.
Sexual connection.
Good.
What else? I I well, I guess I've always been a romantic.
I've always just felt like happiest when I'm in love.
Hmm.
Can I say something that might not make any sense to you? Sure.
You don't want a boyfriend.
Hmm.
Mmm.
I do though.
Consciously, you do.
But when every part of us truly wants something Mm-hmm.
We can manifest it like that.
So the fact that you're sitting up here and you're telling me that you want a boyfriend but you don't have one, it tells me that there's some part of you somewhere that just isn't completely on board.
Mm-hmm.
You're not listening to every part of Elodie.
Would you like to hear what she has to say? Yes, yes.
What does she say? Okay.
Well, I'm going to embody Elodie, so that you two can have a conversation.
How does that sound? Trippy.
Okay.
Why don't you give me your hand, sweetie? Okay.
I think if you get into a relationship, you're gonna mess it up like you always do.
You're gonna scare him away because he's gonna realize how pathetic you really are.
You're unrealized and superficial.
And roller skating is not a point of view.
Is she really channeling right now? Every time you get into a relationship, you get ignored or rejected all over again.
So I'm going to reject every man that comes my way before he has a chance to reject me! So what now? You have to convince me that you're worthy.
Otherwise, you are going to die alone.
Ooh.
Do you see what happened there? We got in touch with the part of Elodie that is in resistance.
You won't acknowledge her power over you.
- Thank you, Elodie.
- Why don't you take a seat? That was amazing.
So here at Lyte, what we're trying to do is heal the wounds that put us in resistance with the things that we need.
That was the first step towards healing that particular trauma because you weren't born with that trauma.
Something happened in your life that fractured you.
We have hundreds of fractures.
It's overwhelming, isn't it? Yeah.
But here's the good news.
We are going to fix all of that.
And we're gonna do it with a small private group.
Just you all, me, Portia, Drew, Elliott, and some of the most well regarded scientists working in our time.
I mean I mean, how does that sound? - Awesome.
- Whoo! Normally, it would take a lifetime to heal all of these wounds.
But we are developing a pill that is 100% backed by science that is going to integrate all the tiny broken pieces of your souls in one fell swoop.
And with all due respect, if she can enlighten you guys, she can enlighten anyone.
I need this.
I have a lot of issues.
This is so messed up.
Do you want to share your thoughts with us, Dogey? Yeah.
I just have a problem with what I just saw.
You didn't become a part of her.
You bullied that girl.
I don't like this one bit.
Is that because maybe you're afraid to do this work? Um, no.
I think it's just all bullshit.
- Nah, man, expand your mind.
- This shit is real.
Ugh, I can't even with how low you vibrate.
Hey, it's okay.
He just has a choice to make.
Do you want to work on yourself and bettering the lives of everyone in the world or do you want to leave? There's a great restaurant right next door if you want to grab a bite on your way home.
Wow.
Fuck you.
Fuck all of this.
I'm Catholic.
He's famously closeted.
- Oh, okay.
- Is there anyone else who is having doubts about this? Because this is not something to take lightly.
This is a huge responsibility.
And you will be dedicating 100% of your lives to this cause.
People may not understand.
Family and partners, they may question you about this.
But that should embolden you because that tells you that their love has always been conditional.
That's an unfortunate truth because even our parents withhold love from us when we don't turn out how they envisioned.
But we will become a family together in our pursuit for unconditional love.
We are voyagers of true love for the betterment of humanity.
And if that is not something that you are interested in, then you're free to leave.
I'm with you.
Me too.
Same.
- I'm in.
- Yeah.
I mean, we have to.
Let's do this! Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
This is a day that I've been looking forward to my entire life.
I just didn't know it.
Every now and again, an innovation comes along that changes everything.
I've been lucky to be at the helm of several of these.
In 1992, I envisioned a world where people could send messages back and forth at the speed of light, allowing everybody to easefully make plans with each other.
I called it texting.
We love texting! And now I bring you the greatest breakthrough in the history of our species, universal enlightenment.
That's right.
And to explain it, I'd like to introduce my friend and business partner.
Together, we've been working on a formula to change the world.
Dory Sief.
Yeah, Dory! - Okay.
- So I don't get a kiss? Hmm.
I believe.
I believe that humankind can not only know love but be love.
That we are intended to transcend consciousness to survive.
Since the dawn of time, we have pined for an era where we reconcile the dilemma of who we are and why we are here and transmute ourselves into absolute peace.
We are evolving.
And we're so thrilled to present the very first to evolve.
These six test subjects were chosen from amongst 210 million Americans and asked to redirect their online presence with a new focus on the quest for enlightenment.
These pioneers are gonna be the first people on the planet to take the pill that's gonna bring about a revolution of love.
And now may I introduce my disciples.
- Whoo! - Whoo! First up, Leonora Hamsdale.
Red Lyte! Marty Plushfeld! Orange Lyte! Winnie Miranda! Yellow Lyte! Pepper Southerland! Green Lyte! Ritchie Thinky! Blue Lyte! Yeah! And Elodie Revlon! Violet Lyte! Yeah! Whoo! Yeah! Hey.
You okay? Yeah.
Yeah, I'm doing fine.