Shifting Gears (2025) s01e01 Episode Script
Restoration
1
Damn, you are lookin' good.
I've loved all this time
we've been spending together.
Ready to take this to the next level.
Man, are you talkin' to this car again?
She's got a name. Victoria.
Dude, you crazy.
With a trunk like that, she's a Felicia,
and you know it.
Okay, let's get back to work.
I don't wanna mess up Matt's good mood.
Yeah, he hasn't gone off
on his usual rant.
You realize I can hear
everything from in here?
Let me guess, the world's
goin' to hell in a handbasket?
We don't even make
handbaskets in the U.S. anymore.
You know what we do make?
Excuses, quitters, and diabetes.
And celebrities that use
diabetes medicine to lose weight.
You wanna lose weight? It's simple.
This hole here, bigger
than this one back here.
My rule for you?
When you get on a roll, so do I.
Well, I got something you're gonna like.
I, uh, hooked up the
high-voltage line to the motor
and I'm getting ready
to test the inverter.
I got a question for you.
Have you ever washed that hat?
Looks like a normal hat that
was left in Portland too long.
I can't wash it. It's my lucky hat.
Well, tell me when that starts working.
Hey, Matt, you're gonna wanna see this.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
[ENGINE RATTLING]
Is that my GTO?
I built that 15 years ago.
Then somebody stole it.
Hi, Dad.
There's the thief.
Wow, Riley. That was,
like, a 15-year joyride.
Well, the joy ends here.
I decided it's time for me to return it.
What are you doing here?
You got a lot of nerve
- coming back driving this time
- Hey, kids, say hi to Grandpa.
- Hey, Pops.
- Papa!
Hey, hey, hey.
Well, this is, uh, one tense garage.
Technically, it's a restomod shop.
A very tense restomod shop.
[ROCK THEME PLAYING]
- [KEYS JINGLING]
- [DOOR OPENING]
I see you still keep your house key
under the Reagan gnome.
You still speed through school zones.
House is still the same.
It's like she's still here.
Well, she's not.
Why are my grandkids out in the car?
I told them to wait there
so we can catch up loudly.
And also to call the cops, if necessary.
What are you doing here like this?
Is there something wrong with the car?
The car is the one thing
that's doing great.
That's 'cause when I build
stuff, it's built to last.
Except our relationship.
Well, that's pretty much on you, Riley.
Mm, that's on us.
It's like the only thing
we did together.
Can we try to talk to each
other like rational adults?
Have you watched the news lately?
That's not a thing anymore.
I just mean catch up.
Aside from a few
very awkward Christmases,
I've barely seen you.
How the heck are ya?
You barely spoke to me
at your mom's funeral.
- Not true.
- Yes, it was.
You just nodded a couple times,
like I'm the front desk guy at a gym.
I haven't seen you since then.
- I get why you're mad.
- Let's go way back.
How 'bout the last time
you walked out that door,
you looked back at me and said,
you remember that,
"I hate you, Dad."
And gave me a double bird.
I was 18.
The double bird was how
I ended all our conversations.
You walked out of here pregnant,
you bailed out of college,
and you went off with some "musician."
- Yeah, James is a musician.
- No, he's not.
He's a bass player.
Plunk-plunk-plunk.
Sit down, you're done.
He didn't even have the courtesy
to ask for your hand in marriage.
Oh, 'cause you would've said yes?
Hell no!
Can we take it down a notch?
I just drove from Vegas with two kids
who were six inches too far back
for me to hit from the front seat.
What are you doing here?
And where is Jimmy?
We're getting a divorce.
I'm broke, and I have
nowhere else to go.
I need a place to stay
until I find a job,
save some money, and figure out
what the rest of my life looks like.
So, a couple of days.
Hey, you weren't my first choice either.
There was a doomsday cult
I had my eye on, but
it wasn't kid-friendly.
Oh, God, this was all so much
easier when Mom was here.
A lot easier when your mom was here.
The only reason I have a relationship
with my grandkids is 'cause of Mom.
- You kept me at arm's length.
- 'Cause you're a lot.
You're a lot!
Well, demon meet seed.
What happened between
you and Plunk-Plunk?
He was on the road all the time, and
everything that comes with that.
Mom's death was a wake-up call.
What am I doing with my life?
Why am I still with James?
Sure, it pissed you off,
but is that a solid foundation
for a marriage?
I feel like such a cliché,
and I'm just so tired.
I really need your help, Dad.
You guys can stay here.
We'll see how it works out.
[SIGHS] Really?
'Cause I haven't changed a lot.
Neither have I.
♪♪
Today, America unveiled
steep tariff increases
This is exactly why I hate the news.
One person tells you the news,
and three others tell you
what you're supposed
to think about the news.
Like, I'm too stupid to form
my own angry opinions.
Then, why do you watch it?
You have to stay informed, little one.
Plus, the girl in the green's
kinda pretty, huh?
Huh?
She's, like, 80.
Well, so are you, so it makes sense.
That was your Uncle Sammy
calling from Fort Dix.
He says, "Hi. Love you guys,"
and, "Run! Get out now!
What are you doing? Are you insane?"
[MATT] There's waffles
there, coffee there.
Right now, I'm teaching the kids
how to hate-watch the news
while they eat.
Well, looks like they forgot to tell you
I have a no-screens rule during meals.
Well, maybe at your house that works,
but we're at my house now.
You can watch whatever you want,
as long as it's something I want.
And we totally appreciate
being in Papa's house.
But meals are the one time
you can tune out the world
and hear what's going on
in each other's lives.
Eh.
Alright, Carter.
What's going on in your life?
Not much. You?
Not much.
But China's still pissed at us.
while increasing others,
including the
- Do you mind, Dad?
- [TURNING OFF TV]
Okay, well, now that you're home, Riley,
what's, uh, what's your plan?
Uh, well, I have to get
the kids enrolled in school,
find a job of some kind.
Hey, not too late to go back to college.
FYI, I got my bachelor's degree online.
I graduated top of my kitchen.
You could get into law school.
That's always been your dream.
Uh, actually,
that was your dream for me.
Because you're smart,
talented, you know?
You, you like to argue.
You love to argue.
Might as well get paid for it.
[LAUGHING] You do love to argue.
Yeah, Pop's throwing shade.
Give me some, Pops.
There we go, yeah!
Yeah, good shade, Pops.
Anyway, I just have to get
my life up and running again.
Or at least, up and hobbling.
Wise words from my overachiever.
[MATT CHUCKLES]
Georgia, last time we talked,
you saw that Barbie movie.
You said you're gonna tear down
the patriarchy, right?
Old news.
My dream now is to become a billionaire,
like Lori from Shark Tank.
She travels by helicopter.
Well, good luck finding a man
that's okay with his wife
making more money than him.
I don't need a man to feel complete.
When you want to kill a spider,
a man's gonna look pretty darn good.
I have a shoe.
A woman that can
kill insects, I like that.
You should put that
on your dating profile.
Mom, can I get a dating profile?
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
Yeah, the whole block's gentrified now.
All the bars have mocktails.
They're not so bad
with a little vodka in them.
- So, what do you think?
- [GEORGIA GASPS]
- Pretty impressive, huh?
- This is the Scrub Daddy!
Lori from Shark Tank blew these up!
It's a sponge.
Hey, Pops, I recognize all this stuff
- from your Instagram.
- Oh!
What do you think?
Meh.
What do you mean, "Meh"?
You know, it's kinda lame, to be honest.
Uh, a lot of pics of you with old cars,
thumbs up, you know
Why don't you tell us
about this car right here?
- Go ahead.
- Okay.
This '70s muscle car,
we built for the studios.
Every detective in those movies
drove a car like this,
a detective that didn't
play by the rules.
He only trusted his very small,
adorable waitress named Trixie
who, unfortunately,
took two bullets for him.
It was a quick death, though.
You know, better than a thumbs-up.
- Can you take us for a ride?
- Uh, sure.
Hey, Riley, we're gonna
take a little ride.
- Do you want to go with us?
- No.
They need quality Papa time.
And I need quality no-Papa time.
[TIRES SCREECHING]
Why are we here? You gotta pee again?
- Yes!
- [CUTS ENGINE]
Listen, wanna take the wheel here?
- You took driver's ed, right?
- What?
Oh, no. I don't, I don't need to drive.
Mom got me an Uber account.
She pays to have someone
drive you around?
Yep. But it's worth it
for her to know her baby's safe.
Her words, not mine.
Besides, all my friends use Uber.
- It's the way the world works now.
- No, no, no.
Let me tell you how the world works.
Oh, hang on. My friends are
definitely gonna wanna hear this.
Listen, you screen-addicted
little freaks.
You can't go through life
being a passenger.
You gotta get out there.
You're gonna have to get
yourself to school, to work.
Work, something parents don't
even make kids do anymore
because they wanna be part of the crew.
So, put your phones down
and get your
vitamin D-deprived bodies out
and learn how to drive a car. Come on.
Jesus didn't Uber.
He takes the wheel. Huh?
Now, get over here and be
master of your own destiny.
Nah.
- I wanna drive!
- You hear that?
Your little sister wants to drive
and she can't even reach the pedals.
You probably know more about driving
than your brother does, right?
- Absolutely.
- Mm.
That's the go-ey,
and that's the stop-ey.
You hear that?
That's the go-ey. That's the stop-ey.
Maybe she could teach you how to drive.
You're not gonna let this go, are you?
I don't think I am.
Alright, fine.
[ENGINE RATTLING]
- It started making a noise.
- Like a click or a hum?
Like a
[IN HIGH-PITCH VOICE] This
was a mistake!
Yooouuu're
never gonna get along with your dad.
Oh, that's the brake pads.
Come on, Gabriel. You
were my brother's best friend.
You know how difficult my dad is.
Says the girl who was voted
"Mean for No Reason."
Oh, there's always a reason.
Your dad's not so bad.
He just loves you.
And cars. You and cars.
- The order isn't important.
- Oh.
My God! You still think
he walks on water.
I saw it with my own eyes.
It was a spilled bottle of antifreeze,
but he was definitely off the ground.
Gotta admit, though,
he was right about Jimmy.
Oh, please. You always hated Jimmy
'cause he rode a motorcycle
and got all the girls.
I don't care how many girls Jimmy got.
He just got the one he didn't deserve.
Shut up.
You shut up.
You shut up more.
Okay, fine, I'll try to be nicer
to your damn hero.
Hey.
Stitch saw the antifreeze thing too.
He was like an Olympic skater.
So elegant. So beautiful.
Do not make me be mean for a reason.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
- [CARTER] I'm gonna die!
- [ENGINE REVVING]
- [TIRES SCREECHING]
- I'm gonna puke!
Don't you dare! Swallow it!
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
- Look at me, I'm driving.
- [MATT CHUCKLES]
- Can I have this car?
- No.
I'm giving you something
far more valuable.
Self-sufficiency.
- Rather have the car.
- [MATT CHUCKLES]
Listen, stay off the street,
head down this alley,
we'll park behind the shop.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
You know, it's fun
seeing you and your dad
come back together again.
It's like watching those hurricanes
form their own tornadoes.
Since Diane passed,
it's really been tough on him.
Hell, all of us.
Gabriel makes us go
to Happy Hour on Friday.
Happy Hour, Riley.
My dad went to Happy Hour?
What'd he do for the other 59 minutes?
You know, I know he can be difficult,
but deep down inside
No, who are we fooling?
He a pain in the ass.
But you know what?
I can tell he's really
happy you're home.
[SIGHS] I am trying to make this work.
Maybe it's finally time to clip
the wings of my double bird.
- [TIRES SCREECHING LOUDLY]
- [LOUD CRASH]
What the hell?!
[STEAM HISSING]
We're okay, Mom! Carter hit the go-ey
instead of the stop-ey.
I told you I didn't want to drive.
I could use a mocktail.
You forced him to drive!
You couldn't respect his wishes?
Your kid was having
a great time out there.
You think you know what's best for them?
I'm their parent, not you.
It's-It's life lessons.
You-You can't coddle these kids.
Coddle?
Carter has got an Uber account?
You're paying for him
not to learn something
that he needs to know. What's next?
You pay Martha Stewart to
stop over and do his laundry?
- That's your opinion, okay?
- It's not an opinion.
As always, your opinion is
the only one that matters, right?
- It's an observation. Observation.
- Like me being a lawyer.
I said I didn't want to be one,
and you're still pushing,
- even today.
- You push kids in a direction
to encourage what they're doing.
Oh, please. You never gave a damn
- about what I wanted, okay?
- Oh, God.
It was always your way or the highway.
Well, I picked the highway.
Took it right back here, didn't you?
[EXHALES SHARPLY]
God, I thought I loved
my kids enough to put up
with whatever you dished out,
but, God, you're selfish.
You're selfish.
Your mom's funeral,
you stayed at a motel.
You didn't even stay here.
How do you think that made me feel?
James didn't wanna stay here with you.
Who cares about what
the bass player wanted?
Well, to be honest,
I didn't wanna stay here either.
I was too broken over Mom
to try to keep the peace
between you two.
Mom made a relationship
between you and me possible.
She was our bridge.
[MATT SIGHS]
It was a mistake coming here.
N-No, it wasn't. I-I like it here.
- The car thing isn't Pop's fault.
- Don't cover for him.
No, stop, I wanna see
where this is going.
I took your car one night back home
and accidentally knocked down our fence.
It freaked me the hell out,
and that's why
I haven't wanted to drive ever since.
That was you?
I blamed the punk-ass kid
across the street.
I slashed the tires on his dirt bike.
I think I'm just a bad driver.
No, no, no, no.
You just need more practice
in wide open spaces
in cars not owned by me.
I need a moment to cool down.
And you're grounded.
So, no hanging out with your friends.
We just moved here.
I don't have any friends.
Which will make it pretty easy.
[RILEY EXHALES SHARPLY]
[VIDEO GAME GUNFIRE]
- [GUNFIRE CONTINUES]
- [MATT MUMBLING]
Kill the old lady, Papa!
Why do I want to kill that lady?
She's the drug lord
you've been hired to take out.
- Alright. Here you go, lady.
- [GUNFIRE CONTINUES]
- There you go.
- [LOUD EXPLOSION]
Oh, God, look!
- Epic.
- Whoa!
You blew her head
over the Golden Gate Bridge.
You guys scare me.
[MATT EXHALES SHARPLY]
Is it weird to say
I love killing as a family?
I found Mom's flour sifter.
It's still covered in flour.
It's almost like she'll walk
through the door any minute
and start making apple cider cake.
I I never use it, and I
I'm not gonna ever wash it.
Yeah. Well, I'm glad you didn't.
- [RILEY SIGHS]
- Well, you, um
Um, we used that, uh, that morning.
She made those, uh, those biscuits.
And then, she's gonna go for a run.
Ah, boy.
Two hours later, um, her
heart stopped, and then, um
your beautiful mother
and love of my life
she's gone. Yeah.
Yeah. [SIGHS]
I'm so sorry I haven't
been there for you.
- Yeah.
- I wish I had been here more.
Yeah. Yeah, well
Yeah. Thanks.
Oh, thanks.
[SNIFFLING] Oh, boy.
It's been really different here, alone.
Um, I think that's why I watch
the news in the morning,
you know, so I can hear
a, a woman's voice,
even though sometimes it's Nancy Pelosi.
Yeah, ugh.
It's annoying the way
she's trying to save democracy.
- Maybe we could
- [SIGHS]
build our own bridge.
Ten minutes of news in the morning,
and then talk like a family?
Okay.
And then, um, if I want
to do something with your kids
that you don't like, you'll just look
at the roof over your head
and go, "Okay."
[SIGHS] I'm not sure you understand
how bridges work.
You are their grandfather and
should be given some leeway.
Okay, I'm good with that.
Plus, Carter needs to learn to drive
and I'm not getting in a car with him.
He sucks.
He's terrible.
You know, by the way, uh,
my insurance company
is gonna file a lawsuit
against you for the damages.
It's just a formality.
Mm. They'll settle quickly
when I file child endangerment
charges against you.
Told ya you should have been a lawyer.
♪♪
Knives on the right, forks on the left.
Carter, that's not your
right, and that's not a fork.
My kids are setting the table?
I'm teaching 'em manners.
It's like a lost art.
Like so many things.
Tennis, for instance.
- Oh, boy.
- [MATT] Alright.
It's elegant, strong.
It's a wonderful sport,
but it was too much for people.
So, thank gosh we invented pickleball
so old people can feel
like they're athletes, right?
But when you can hold
a tumbler of Chianti
while you're playing a sport,
it's not a sport.
Now that the TED Talk
no one asked for is over
I made Mom's biscuits.
She'd be very proud of you.
Ooh, hot, hot, hot.
So, what do you think?
[MOUTH FULL] It's so dry.
I can't breathe. [CHOKING]
They're soaking up a lot of butter.
I don't think you should do this again.
Damn, you are lookin' good.
I've loved all this time
we've been spending together.
Ready to take this to the next level.
Man, are you talkin' to this car again?
She's got a name. Victoria.
Dude, you crazy.
With a trunk like that, she's a Felicia,
and you know it.
Okay, let's get back to work.
I don't wanna mess up Matt's good mood.
Yeah, he hasn't gone off
on his usual rant.
You realize I can hear
everything from in here?
Let me guess, the world's
goin' to hell in a handbasket?
We don't even make
handbaskets in the U.S. anymore.
You know what we do make?
Excuses, quitters, and diabetes.
And celebrities that use
diabetes medicine to lose weight.
You wanna lose weight? It's simple.
This hole here, bigger
than this one back here.
My rule for you?
When you get on a roll, so do I.
Well, I got something you're gonna like.
I, uh, hooked up the
high-voltage line to the motor
and I'm getting ready
to test the inverter.
I got a question for you.
Have you ever washed that hat?
Looks like a normal hat that
was left in Portland too long.
I can't wash it. It's my lucky hat.
Well, tell me when that starts working.
Hey, Matt, you're gonna wanna see this.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
[ENGINE RATTLING]
Is that my GTO?
I built that 15 years ago.
Then somebody stole it.
Hi, Dad.
There's the thief.
Wow, Riley. That was,
like, a 15-year joyride.
Well, the joy ends here.
I decided it's time for me to return it.
What are you doing here?
You got a lot of nerve
- coming back driving this time
- Hey, kids, say hi to Grandpa.
- Hey, Pops.
- Papa!
Hey, hey, hey.
Well, this is, uh, one tense garage.
Technically, it's a restomod shop.
A very tense restomod shop.
[ROCK THEME PLAYING]
- [KEYS JINGLING]
- [DOOR OPENING]
I see you still keep your house key
under the Reagan gnome.
You still speed through school zones.
House is still the same.
It's like she's still here.
Well, she's not.
Why are my grandkids out in the car?
I told them to wait there
so we can catch up loudly.
And also to call the cops, if necessary.
What are you doing here like this?
Is there something wrong with the car?
The car is the one thing
that's doing great.
That's 'cause when I build
stuff, it's built to last.
Except our relationship.
Well, that's pretty much on you, Riley.
Mm, that's on us.
It's like the only thing
we did together.
Can we try to talk to each
other like rational adults?
Have you watched the news lately?
That's not a thing anymore.
I just mean catch up.
Aside from a few
very awkward Christmases,
I've barely seen you.
How the heck are ya?
You barely spoke to me
at your mom's funeral.
- Not true.
- Yes, it was.
You just nodded a couple times,
like I'm the front desk guy at a gym.
I haven't seen you since then.
- I get why you're mad.
- Let's go way back.
How 'bout the last time
you walked out that door,
you looked back at me and said,
you remember that,
"I hate you, Dad."
And gave me a double bird.
I was 18.
The double bird was how
I ended all our conversations.
You walked out of here pregnant,
you bailed out of college,
and you went off with some "musician."
- Yeah, James is a musician.
- No, he's not.
He's a bass player.
Plunk-plunk-plunk.
Sit down, you're done.
He didn't even have the courtesy
to ask for your hand in marriage.
Oh, 'cause you would've said yes?
Hell no!
Can we take it down a notch?
I just drove from Vegas with two kids
who were six inches too far back
for me to hit from the front seat.
What are you doing here?
And where is Jimmy?
We're getting a divorce.
I'm broke, and I have
nowhere else to go.
I need a place to stay
until I find a job,
save some money, and figure out
what the rest of my life looks like.
So, a couple of days.
Hey, you weren't my first choice either.
There was a doomsday cult
I had my eye on, but
it wasn't kid-friendly.
Oh, God, this was all so much
easier when Mom was here.
A lot easier when your mom was here.
The only reason I have a relationship
with my grandkids is 'cause of Mom.
- You kept me at arm's length.
- 'Cause you're a lot.
You're a lot!
Well, demon meet seed.
What happened between
you and Plunk-Plunk?
He was on the road all the time, and
everything that comes with that.
Mom's death was a wake-up call.
What am I doing with my life?
Why am I still with James?
Sure, it pissed you off,
but is that a solid foundation
for a marriage?
I feel like such a cliché,
and I'm just so tired.
I really need your help, Dad.
You guys can stay here.
We'll see how it works out.
[SIGHS] Really?
'Cause I haven't changed a lot.
Neither have I.
♪♪
Today, America unveiled
steep tariff increases
This is exactly why I hate the news.
One person tells you the news,
and three others tell you
what you're supposed
to think about the news.
Like, I'm too stupid to form
my own angry opinions.
Then, why do you watch it?
You have to stay informed, little one.
Plus, the girl in the green's
kinda pretty, huh?
Huh?
She's, like, 80.
Well, so are you, so it makes sense.
That was your Uncle Sammy
calling from Fort Dix.
He says, "Hi. Love you guys,"
and, "Run! Get out now!
What are you doing? Are you insane?"
[MATT] There's waffles
there, coffee there.
Right now, I'm teaching the kids
how to hate-watch the news
while they eat.
Well, looks like they forgot to tell you
I have a no-screens rule during meals.
Well, maybe at your house that works,
but we're at my house now.
You can watch whatever you want,
as long as it's something I want.
And we totally appreciate
being in Papa's house.
But meals are the one time
you can tune out the world
and hear what's going on
in each other's lives.
Eh.
Alright, Carter.
What's going on in your life?
Not much. You?
Not much.
But China's still pissed at us.
while increasing others,
including the
- Do you mind, Dad?
- [TURNING OFF TV]
Okay, well, now that you're home, Riley,
what's, uh, what's your plan?
Uh, well, I have to get
the kids enrolled in school,
find a job of some kind.
Hey, not too late to go back to college.
FYI, I got my bachelor's degree online.
I graduated top of my kitchen.
You could get into law school.
That's always been your dream.
Uh, actually,
that was your dream for me.
Because you're smart,
talented, you know?
You, you like to argue.
You love to argue.
Might as well get paid for it.
[LAUGHING] You do love to argue.
Yeah, Pop's throwing shade.
Give me some, Pops.
There we go, yeah!
Yeah, good shade, Pops.
Anyway, I just have to get
my life up and running again.
Or at least, up and hobbling.
Wise words from my overachiever.
[MATT CHUCKLES]
Georgia, last time we talked,
you saw that Barbie movie.
You said you're gonna tear down
the patriarchy, right?
Old news.
My dream now is to become a billionaire,
like Lori from Shark Tank.
She travels by helicopter.
Well, good luck finding a man
that's okay with his wife
making more money than him.
I don't need a man to feel complete.
When you want to kill a spider,
a man's gonna look pretty darn good.
I have a shoe.
A woman that can
kill insects, I like that.
You should put that
on your dating profile.
Mom, can I get a dating profile?
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
Yeah, the whole block's gentrified now.
All the bars have mocktails.
They're not so bad
with a little vodka in them.
- So, what do you think?
- [GEORGIA GASPS]
- Pretty impressive, huh?
- This is the Scrub Daddy!
Lori from Shark Tank blew these up!
It's a sponge.
Hey, Pops, I recognize all this stuff
- from your Instagram.
- Oh!
What do you think?
Meh.
What do you mean, "Meh"?
You know, it's kinda lame, to be honest.
Uh, a lot of pics of you with old cars,
thumbs up, you know
Why don't you tell us
about this car right here?
- Go ahead.
- Okay.
This '70s muscle car,
we built for the studios.
Every detective in those movies
drove a car like this,
a detective that didn't
play by the rules.
He only trusted his very small,
adorable waitress named Trixie
who, unfortunately,
took two bullets for him.
It was a quick death, though.
You know, better than a thumbs-up.
- Can you take us for a ride?
- Uh, sure.
Hey, Riley, we're gonna
take a little ride.
- Do you want to go with us?
- No.
They need quality Papa time.
And I need quality no-Papa time.
[TIRES SCREECHING]
Why are we here? You gotta pee again?
- Yes!
- [CUTS ENGINE]
Listen, wanna take the wheel here?
- You took driver's ed, right?
- What?
Oh, no. I don't, I don't need to drive.
Mom got me an Uber account.
She pays to have someone
drive you around?
Yep. But it's worth it
for her to know her baby's safe.
Her words, not mine.
Besides, all my friends use Uber.
- It's the way the world works now.
- No, no, no.
Let me tell you how the world works.
Oh, hang on. My friends are
definitely gonna wanna hear this.
Listen, you screen-addicted
little freaks.
You can't go through life
being a passenger.
You gotta get out there.
You're gonna have to get
yourself to school, to work.
Work, something parents don't
even make kids do anymore
because they wanna be part of the crew.
So, put your phones down
and get your
vitamin D-deprived bodies out
and learn how to drive a car. Come on.
Jesus didn't Uber.
He takes the wheel. Huh?
Now, get over here and be
master of your own destiny.
Nah.
- I wanna drive!
- You hear that?
Your little sister wants to drive
and she can't even reach the pedals.
You probably know more about driving
than your brother does, right?
- Absolutely.
- Mm.
That's the go-ey,
and that's the stop-ey.
You hear that?
That's the go-ey. That's the stop-ey.
Maybe she could teach you how to drive.
You're not gonna let this go, are you?
I don't think I am.
Alright, fine.
[ENGINE RATTLING]
- It started making a noise.
- Like a click or a hum?
Like a
[IN HIGH-PITCH VOICE] This
was a mistake!
Yooouuu're
never gonna get along with your dad.
Oh, that's the brake pads.
Come on, Gabriel. You
were my brother's best friend.
You know how difficult my dad is.
Says the girl who was voted
"Mean for No Reason."
Oh, there's always a reason.
Your dad's not so bad.
He just loves you.
And cars. You and cars.
- The order isn't important.
- Oh.
My God! You still think
he walks on water.
I saw it with my own eyes.
It was a spilled bottle of antifreeze,
but he was definitely off the ground.
Gotta admit, though,
he was right about Jimmy.
Oh, please. You always hated Jimmy
'cause he rode a motorcycle
and got all the girls.
I don't care how many girls Jimmy got.
He just got the one he didn't deserve.
Shut up.
You shut up.
You shut up more.
Okay, fine, I'll try to be nicer
to your damn hero.
Hey.
Stitch saw the antifreeze thing too.
He was like an Olympic skater.
So elegant. So beautiful.
Do not make me be mean for a reason.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
- [CARTER] I'm gonna die!
- [ENGINE REVVING]
- [TIRES SCREECHING]
- I'm gonna puke!
Don't you dare! Swallow it!
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
- Look at me, I'm driving.
- [MATT CHUCKLES]
- Can I have this car?
- No.
I'm giving you something
far more valuable.
Self-sufficiency.
- Rather have the car.
- [MATT CHUCKLES]
Listen, stay off the street,
head down this alley,
we'll park behind the shop.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
You know, it's fun
seeing you and your dad
come back together again.
It's like watching those hurricanes
form their own tornadoes.
Since Diane passed,
it's really been tough on him.
Hell, all of us.
Gabriel makes us go
to Happy Hour on Friday.
Happy Hour, Riley.
My dad went to Happy Hour?
What'd he do for the other 59 minutes?
You know, I know he can be difficult,
but deep down inside
No, who are we fooling?
He a pain in the ass.
But you know what?
I can tell he's really
happy you're home.
[SIGHS] I am trying to make this work.
Maybe it's finally time to clip
the wings of my double bird.
- [TIRES SCREECHING LOUDLY]
- [LOUD CRASH]
What the hell?!
[STEAM HISSING]
We're okay, Mom! Carter hit the go-ey
instead of the stop-ey.
I told you I didn't want to drive.
I could use a mocktail.
You forced him to drive!
You couldn't respect his wishes?
Your kid was having
a great time out there.
You think you know what's best for them?
I'm their parent, not you.
It's-It's life lessons.
You-You can't coddle these kids.
Coddle?
Carter has got an Uber account?
You're paying for him
not to learn something
that he needs to know. What's next?
You pay Martha Stewart to
stop over and do his laundry?
- That's your opinion, okay?
- It's not an opinion.
As always, your opinion is
the only one that matters, right?
- It's an observation. Observation.
- Like me being a lawyer.
I said I didn't want to be one,
and you're still pushing,
- even today.
- You push kids in a direction
to encourage what they're doing.
Oh, please. You never gave a damn
- about what I wanted, okay?
- Oh, God.
It was always your way or the highway.
Well, I picked the highway.
Took it right back here, didn't you?
[EXHALES SHARPLY]
God, I thought I loved
my kids enough to put up
with whatever you dished out,
but, God, you're selfish.
You're selfish.
Your mom's funeral,
you stayed at a motel.
You didn't even stay here.
How do you think that made me feel?
James didn't wanna stay here with you.
Who cares about what
the bass player wanted?
Well, to be honest,
I didn't wanna stay here either.
I was too broken over Mom
to try to keep the peace
between you two.
Mom made a relationship
between you and me possible.
She was our bridge.
[MATT SIGHS]
It was a mistake coming here.
N-No, it wasn't. I-I like it here.
- The car thing isn't Pop's fault.
- Don't cover for him.
No, stop, I wanna see
where this is going.
I took your car one night back home
and accidentally knocked down our fence.
It freaked me the hell out,
and that's why
I haven't wanted to drive ever since.
That was you?
I blamed the punk-ass kid
across the street.
I slashed the tires on his dirt bike.
I think I'm just a bad driver.
No, no, no, no.
You just need more practice
in wide open spaces
in cars not owned by me.
I need a moment to cool down.
And you're grounded.
So, no hanging out with your friends.
We just moved here.
I don't have any friends.
Which will make it pretty easy.
[RILEY EXHALES SHARPLY]
[VIDEO GAME GUNFIRE]
- [GUNFIRE CONTINUES]
- [MATT MUMBLING]
Kill the old lady, Papa!
Why do I want to kill that lady?
She's the drug lord
you've been hired to take out.
- Alright. Here you go, lady.
- [GUNFIRE CONTINUES]
- There you go.
- [LOUD EXPLOSION]
Oh, God, look!
- Epic.
- Whoa!
You blew her head
over the Golden Gate Bridge.
You guys scare me.
[MATT EXHALES SHARPLY]
Is it weird to say
I love killing as a family?
I found Mom's flour sifter.
It's still covered in flour.
It's almost like she'll walk
through the door any minute
and start making apple cider cake.
I I never use it, and I
I'm not gonna ever wash it.
Yeah. Well, I'm glad you didn't.
- [RILEY SIGHS]
- Well, you, um
Um, we used that, uh, that morning.
She made those, uh, those biscuits.
And then, she's gonna go for a run.
Ah, boy.
Two hours later, um, her
heart stopped, and then, um
your beautiful mother
and love of my life
she's gone. Yeah.
Yeah. [SIGHS]
I'm so sorry I haven't
been there for you.
- Yeah.
- I wish I had been here more.
Yeah. Yeah, well
Yeah. Thanks.
Oh, thanks.
[SNIFFLING] Oh, boy.
It's been really different here, alone.
Um, I think that's why I watch
the news in the morning,
you know, so I can hear
a, a woman's voice,
even though sometimes it's Nancy Pelosi.
Yeah, ugh.
It's annoying the way
she's trying to save democracy.
- Maybe we could
- [SIGHS]
build our own bridge.
Ten minutes of news in the morning,
and then talk like a family?
Okay.
And then, um, if I want
to do something with your kids
that you don't like, you'll just look
at the roof over your head
and go, "Okay."
[SIGHS] I'm not sure you understand
how bridges work.
You are their grandfather and
should be given some leeway.
Okay, I'm good with that.
Plus, Carter needs to learn to drive
and I'm not getting in a car with him.
He sucks.
He's terrible.
You know, by the way, uh,
my insurance company
is gonna file a lawsuit
against you for the damages.
It's just a formality.
Mm. They'll settle quickly
when I file child endangerment
charges against you.
Told ya you should have been a lawyer.
♪♪
Knives on the right, forks on the left.
Carter, that's not your
right, and that's not a fork.
My kids are setting the table?
I'm teaching 'em manners.
It's like a lost art.
Like so many things.
Tennis, for instance.
- Oh, boy.
- [MATT] Alright.
It's elegant, strong.
It's a wonderful sport,
but it was too much for people.
So, thank gosh we invented pickleball
so old people can feel
like they're athletes, right?
But when you can hold
a tumbler of Chianti
while you're playing a sport,
it's not a sport.
Now that the TED Talk
no one asked for is over
I made Mom's biscuits.
She'd be very proud of you.
Ooh, hot, hot, hot.
So, what do you think?
[MOUTH FULL] It's so dry.
I can't breathe. [CHOKING]
They're soaking up a lot of butter.
I don't think you should do this again.