Sonic Boom (2014) s01e08 Episode Script
Eggheads
Grrr! I don't care what anyone says.
Meh Burgers are the best burgers.
Mm! It's like Mardi Gras in my mouth.
Only no one in my mouth is handing out beads.
[all.]
Huh? What will he do with that skateboard? I think he's gonna ride it.
[all.]
Ooh! What? He's riding a skateboard.
How is that impressive? He's got serious street-wise style.
He's jumping six inches off the ground.
Radical speed! [villagers gasp.]
Oh, for the love of-- Wow, those were some sweet moves! Thanks, bro.
You hear that? He called me bro.
Yeah, I heard.
He's quite a wordsmith.
It's Swifty.
Swifty the Shrew.
I don't see what the fuss is about.
He's just a shrew in gaudy clothes.
I got it.
You caught my burger.
Radical speed.
Radical speed.
Give me a break.
I can feed people sandwiches.
Watch.
[coughs.]
Hey, lay off, man! Help! Help! My baby! Somebody needs to help that baby.
Say no more, compadre bromigo.
Time for some [all except Sonic.]
Radical speed.
[groans.]
[excited gasps.]
-Well, I'm saving the day too.
Time for some rescuing baby action hero-ness? I'll figure out a catchphrase later.
[all.]
Wow! Ow, my retinas! Glue! Get your fresh glue here.
Ugh! Remember, when you need a hero with style, give me a call.
I'm Swifty the Shrew.
Catch you around, dudes and lady-dudes.
I'd love to be his lady-dude.
Oh! Me too.
Oh! Fainting party! Agh! Lousy Swifty and his lousy in-your-face streetwise style.
Lousy hip urban lingo.
Did you see the way he pulled down his sunglasses and winked? Oh, he's perfect.
I know.
If he ever visited me, I'd disable all my booby traps.
You never disable your booby traps.
I know! [groans.]
This is one bodacious radical flying machine, duderino bro-guy.
Duderino bro-guy? [both.]
Totally radical engineering! [laughs.]
Hey, that's my best friend you're bonding with, punk.
Whoa, chillax, blue man.
What's the big dealio? The big dealio is I'm sick of you.
I'm sick of your gelled-back fur and I'm sick of your hip urban lingo with words like dealio.
Let's not go aggro, brozilla.
Can't help if I'm more handsome, styling and totally faster than you.
You're not faster than me.
Bro, you've got speed, but not radical speed.
Stop saying that! It's not even a thing.
Radical speed is totally a thing.
A race around the village will prove it isn't.
Ah, sounds dope.
Winner gets bragging rights.
-Agreed.
-And the loser leaves town.
Wait what? If you don't think you've got the skills I've got the skills all right.
I'm so full of skills that they're leaking out of my ears.
Not literally.
That would be disgusting.
See you at the race.
Man, can you believe that guy? What a lameoid.
That lameoid is my best friend.
-That didn't come out right.
-Swifty, you're the lameoid.
You're one thousand times the lameoid that Sonic is.
But look at my flashy threads and fly shades.
Yeah, look at his flashy threads and fly shades.
Knuckles! Swifty, get out.
So long, losers.
Swifty out! [cheering.]
Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for the race of a lifetime.
The winner will have the right to brag whenever and wherever he wants.
The loser will um let's see now be banished from the village forever.
That seems a little harsh, but rules are rules.
[cheering.]
Racers, on your marks.
Get set.
Go! How the-- What if Sonic doesn't win? He'll win.
Nobody's faster than Sonic.
Radical speed! Radical shut your pie hole! Ha-ha! OK, I won.
This is the part where everyone cheers.
[cheering.]
Radical smoothie.
He won? With time to get a smoothie? But how? I passed him.
I saw it.
Something smells fishy about this race.
I told you! I have irritable bowl syndrome.
Ahem.
I think it's time for someone to be all banished, yo.
Sonic the Hedgehog, in accordance with town byelaw 77415, subsection B paragraph 9, I hereby declare you uh banished.
No.
No.
No.
I can't accept that Sonic is gone.
But Sonic is gone! Ha-ha! You all fell victim to the charms of my greatest robot yet.
-A robot? -More like an army of robots.
[all.]
Radical speed! Sonic didn't lose the race.
There were just multiple Swifties all along the track.
I call shenanigans! It's too late for shenanigans.
Now, without your precious hedgehog hero to stop me, I can finally fulfil my lifelong evil dream.
Building my own theme park.
That doesn't sound very evil.
It might even create new jobs.
Silence! In my theme park empire your entire village will be forced to wait in long lines, buy overpriced merch and eat week-old turkey legs covered in preservatives.
[all shriek.]
And remember, it all started with a shrew.
[all scream.]
Waargh! We need Sonic! Ha-ha-ha! Get Sonic back! Oh, well, it's not that simple.
He's been banished.
Then un-banish him.
I can't just un-banish someone.
Un-banishing requires an assembly of the village council.
Then assemble them.
I suppose I could do that.
I hereby call to order the un-banishing proceedings.
OK, let's see.
Hedgehog comma Sonic.
Middle name: The.
Now, where oh where is his 1087-Q1B form? Just do it already! All in favour of un-banishing Sonic so he can save our lives, say "aye".
[all.]
Aye! -All opposed? -Nay.
I hereby declare Sonic un-banished.
-[Over radio.]
Un-banished.
-Go ahead.
[all.]
Unradical! [all cheer.]
My theme park! I was gonna make a killing off that merch.
Ugh! Aargh! Catch you later, Eggface.
-[cheering.]
-I did it! I have a catchphrase.
[clears throat.]
Catch you later, Eggface.
[all laugh politely.]
Ha! Catch you later Eggface.
[all groan.]
Let's not kill it, son.
Meh Burgers are the best burgers.
Mm! It's like Mardi Gras in my mouth.
Only no one in my mouth is handing out beads.
[all.]
Huh? What will he do with that skateboard? I think he's gonna ride it.
[all.]
Ooh! What? He's riding a skateboard.
How is that impressive? He's got serious street-wise style.
He's jumping six inches off the ground.
Radical speed! [villagers gasp.]
Oh, for the love of-- Wow, those were some sweet moves! Thanks, bro.
You hear that? He called me bro.
Yeah, I heard.
He's quite a wordsmith.
It's Swifty.
Swifty the Shrew.
I don't see what the fuss is about.
He's just a shrew in gaudy clothes.
I got it.
You caught my burger.
Radical speed.
Radical speed.
Give me a break.
I can feed people sandwiches.
Watch.
[coughs.]
Hey, lay off, man! Help! Help! My baby! Somebody needs to help that baby.
Say no more, compadre bromigo.
Time for some [all except Sonic.]
Radical speed.
[groans.]
[excited gasps.]
-Well, I'm saving the day too.
Time for some rescuing baby action hero-ness? I'll figure out a catchphrase later.
[all.]
Wow! Ow, my retinas! Glue! Get your fresh glue here.
Ugh! Remember, when you need a hero with style, give me a call.
I'm Swifty the Shrew.
Catch you around, dudes and lady-dudes.
I'd love to be his lady-dude.
Oh! Me too.
Oh! Fainting party! Agh! Lousy Swifty and his lousy in-your-face streetwise style.
Lousy hip urban lingo.
Did you see the way he pulled down his sunglasses and winked? Oh, he's perfect.
I know.
If he ever visited me, I'd disable all my booby traps.
You never disable your booby traps.
I know! [groans.]
This is one bodacious radical flying machine, duderino bro-guy.
Duderino bro-guy? [both.]
Totally radical engineering! [laughs.]
Hey, that's my best friend you're bonding with, punk.
Whoa, chillax, blue man.
What's the big dealio? The big dealio is I'm sick of you.
I'm sick of your gelled-back fur and I'm sick of your hip urban lingo with words like dealio.
Let's not go aggro, brozilla.
Can't help if I'm more handsome, styling and totally faster than you.
You're not faster than me.
Bro, you've got speed, but not radical speed.
Stop saying that! It's not even a thing.
Radical speed is totally a thing.
A race around the village will prove it isn't.
Ah, sounds dope.
Winner gets bragging rights.
-Agreed.
-And the loser leaves town.
Wait what? If you don't think you've got the skills I've got the skills all right.
I'm so full of skills that they're leaking out of my ears.
Not literally.
That would be disgusting.
See you at the race.
Man, can you believe that guy? What a lameoid.
That lameoid is my best friend.
-That didn't come out right.
-Swifty, you're the lameoid.
You're one thousand times the lameoid that Sonic is.
But look at my flashy threads and fly shades.
Yeah, look at his flashy threads and fly shades.
Knuckles! Swifty, get out.
So long, losers.
Swifty out! [cheering.]
Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for the race of a lifetime.
The winner will have the right to brag whenever and wherever he wants.
The loser will um let's see now be banished from the village forever.
That seems a little harsh, but rules are rules.
[cheering.]
Racers, on your marks.
Get set.
Go! How the-- What if Sonic doesn't win? He'll win.
Nobody's faster than Sonic.
Radical speed! Radical shut your pie hole! Ha-ha! OK, I won.
This is the part where everyone cheers.
[cheering.]
Radical smoothie.
He won? With time to get a smoothie? But how? I passed him.
I saw it.
Something smells fishy about this race.
I told you! I have irritable bowl syndrome.
Ahem.
I think it's time for someone to be all banished, yo.
Sonic the Hedgehog, in accordance with town byelaw 77415, subsection B paragraph 9, I hereby declare you uh banished.
No.
No.
No.
I can't accept that Sonic is gone.
But Sonic is gone! Ha-ha! You all fell victim to the charms of my greatest robot yet.
-A robot? -More like an army of robots.
[all.]
Radical speed! Sonic didn't lose the race.
There were just multiple Swifties all along the track.
I call shenanigans! It's too late for shenanigans.
Now, without your precious hedgehog hero to stop me, I can finally fulfil my lifelong evil dream.
Building my own theme park.
That doesn't sound very evil.
It might even create new jobs.
Silence! In my theme park empire your entire village will be forced to wait in long lines, buy overpriced merch and eat week-old turkey legs covered in preservatives.
[all shriek.]
And remember, it all started with a shrew.
[all scream.]
Waargh! We need Sonic! Ha-ha-ha! Get Sonic back! Oh, well, it's not that simple.
He's been banished.
Then un-banish him.
I can't just un-banish someone.
Un-banishing requires an assembly of the village council.
Then assemble them.
I suppose I could do that.
I hereby call to order the un-banishing proceedings.
OK, let's see.
Hedgehog comma Sonic.
Middle name: The.
Now, where oh where is his 1087-Q1B form? Just do it already! All in favour of un-banishing Sonic so he can save our lives, say "aye".
[all.]
Aye! -All opposed? -Nay.
I hereby declare Sonic un-banished.
-[Over radio.]
Un-banished.
-Go ahead.
[all.]
Unradical! [all cheer.]
My theme park! I was gonna make a killing off that merch.
Ugh! Aargh! Catch you later, Eggface.
-[cheering.]
-I did it! I have a catchphrase.
[clears throat.]
Catch you later, Eggface.
[all laugh politely.]
Ha! Catch you later Eggface.
[all groan.]
Let's not kill it, son.