Space Ghost Coast to Coast (1993) s08e01 Episode Script

Baffler Meal

Zorak, take off the mask.
What mask?
You know what mask I'm talking about.
No, I don't.
Yes, you do. You're wearing it right now.
No, I'm not.
Come back here, you godforsaken mantis!
You do have a mask!
Shake power activate.
All right. Um, Mr. Shake is here.
Master shake.
Master is my name, master shake.
Master is my name, and thirst is what I tame.
What is that, and what's it doin' here?
I am dethirstifying the perimeter.
Uh, yeah, zorak, obviously.
Aquateen hunger force, assemble!
Frylock, the hunger hater tater.
Meatwad, ball of compressed meat.
The bun is in your mind.
Aquateen hunger force.
The bun is in your mind.
Meatwad, stand down!
- But it is.
- It's in your mind.
What's with the stupid food puppets?
Zorak, they're a delicious meal from burger trench.
- Burger trench?
- I found a bone in my shake there.
- Mm-mmm.
- No. No, man.
It was human.
Yeah. My dipping sauce had ticks in it.
The mantis mocks our mission.
We battle hunger with nutritious salt- and oil-based weapons.
Yeah, zorak, that's what they do.
And that's what you do from now on.
Um, sure, man, whatever.
- Not whatever.
- Forever!
- Not whatever.
- Forever!
Just get down from my desk, ok?
Frylock, cast your potato magic!
I sense hungry teens.
Could you get off that amulet, please?
I need to sense hungry teens with it.
I'm butterin' it.
With your foot on it, it's really messin' me up.
With foot sweat.
Please get off of it!
Uh, zorak, get off the man's thing.
Frylock, unsheathe your edible blade.
Stand aside, insect, or I shall
strike you down with my battered wedge
forged in corn oil.
Gimme that.
That's my sword!
Then we have ourselves a tasty little problem, then, don't we?
Don't we!?
Ok. Zorak, we're all a team now.
An aquateen.
- And there's no "I"
- In team.
Uh, but there is an "a" in team.
Right, which means, probably, partially,
whatever you do should be ok.
No, never! Your mantis is violating the contract!
- All right, I'm lost.
- What contract?
What are we talking about?
Enjoying your houseboat, hmm?
W-would you mind just not bringing that up right now?
No! Let's talk about it loudly.
No! Let's talk about it loudly.
So thathow you got that houseboat.
You sold us out for promotional considerations.
And a houseboat.
I didn't sell you out for a house The bun is in your mind.
I also received two cool speakers.
Are they surround sound?
Well It. Isit surround sound?
And, no, it is not.
- Whoa. Hold on a second.
- There's only one?
You will receive the second speaker
upon the elimination of all hunger.
You sold us out.
For a crummy houseboat.
And one serious speaker!
And one serious speaker!
- Look, guys.
- We're still doin' the show.
We're just takin' it in a new direction, that's all.
- Yes!
- A delicious direction!
At least
Now with 3 convenient locations.
- That was good.
- I want to turn invisible.
And I want jets.
Look, let's just get the guest out here, ok?
Yes. Bring forth the guest!
What do you do?
You fight hunger, or is hunger your villain?
Master shake is the almighty frozen drink.
Master shake is the almighty frozen drink.
Yeah. Uh, forget about that guy for a second.
What is going on in here?
We fight hunger, and that is all you need to know, lever man.
- To us you are very small.
- We are huge, lever man.
Lever man, don't mess this up for me.
Mess what up?
Oh, someone doesn't know about the
limited edition collector's cup deal.
Oh, no, no.
Hey, master shake collect all 4
from the entire Space Ghost, zorak,
Brak, and
The nascar driver rusty Wallace.
Moltar uh, how can I put this?
You scare children.
I'm the only one that wears a cup.
True, but you wear it in a bad place,
and you never rinse it properly.
How would you know?
Because I drank from it!
And, believe me, it smells, Buster.
The Moltar cup didn't test well. It's yucky.
Children didn't want to put their lips to it.
Yeah. So send Willie out here.
- Do it, lever-man.
- You know I'm the master.
Aah! Master, he took my eye.
Why would you do that, zorak?
Just because he doesn't look like you?
Yeah, that's the reason.
Well, just because someone's
different doesn't give you the right
to remove their face with your mouth your filthy green mouth
that is so odd and jagged.
You know, I sometimes wonder what Between two steamed buns.
Wait a minute.
Been a while since you had one of those, hasn't it?
Hee hee hee.
Up the chain, Willie.
- Greetings, alien.
- I am master shake.
Where'd you get them clothes?
This is a cup which contains my chocolate inner being.
- Hey! Hey! I'm doin'
- The interview here.
Willie, this is a cup which contains my chocolate inner being.
- Hey, there you go.
- Who do you fight?
- Go on, ghost.
- Tell him what you fight.
Um, I fight hunger, Willie.
Louder. Be proud of what we make you do.
Crime down these days?
It's a crime not to pick up a master shake
Now in artificial flavors
somewhat similar to strawberry.
We have a commercial that depicts this crime.
Maybe you've seen it, but I'll describe it for you.
I'm the pieces of meat that weren't
good enough to make the hamburger.
Well, how do people even hold you?
Well, you know the bun?
See, that's in your mind, so they gotta use bare hands.
Yeah, they're gonna rip out my eyes and thread an easy-grip
handle through the holes.
Please, God, kill me.
Then they go to a burger trench and order one of my shakes
because they cannot fight the hunger inside.
It imprisons them.
You can tell that they are burglars
because they wear masks over their eyes,
and they have striped suits.
Then we show them being arrested.
The ad is long, and it is in surround sound.
What planet are you from?
The planet of flavor.
Willie! Hey, Willie!
Hey, how you doin', Tex?
I'm the host of the show, not the cup.
Over here! Look at me.
Initiate hunger imagery.
Look, when we first talked, we said that you would be
running through occasionally with your food friends.
That is correct, because we are action heroes,
and running is action.
Mamas, let your babies grow up to drink master shakes.
Willie, get on the road again for a kid's baffler meal.
Willie, get on the road again for a kid's baffler meal.
Hey! This is outside the scope of what we talked about.
I am always on your mind.
The bun is in your mind.
The bun is in your mind.
- Oh, sweet delight.
- Meatwad is smokin' again.
Yes, keep changing that ad line, meatwad.
How about this one?
Reward yourself by eating a wad of
decayed meat with an oasis of greasy
honey mustard filling lodged
Will you just shut up for 3 seconds?!
Yes. Silence is golden.
Like my delicious golden fries.
They come with a kid's baffler meal.
Baffle yourself with flavor.
Ok, we heard you!
They haven't heard what the box is.
- What? What is it?
- What is the box?
Please tell us what it is, because you're gonna do it anyway.
Tell us all about the box, please!
It's a maze and coloring book.
Well, thank God!
I guess we know who doesn't want a houseboat.
Well come on, I didn't mean that.
You sure yelled it loud enough.
Please don't take awayproud Larry.
Then pronounce your love for me.
You know, this wasn't part of the deal.
- Bow down, and I will dominate you.
- That's the deal.
Now, hold on, master shake!
Is it clear who's in charge in here?
Hail master shake, warrior of the night.
You need to chill out and shut your lid,
cup, or else it'll be time
to shake it up.
And the drinks are on me,
'cause I'm tired of milkin' this shake,
and there's no free refills this time.
Excuse me, ma'am, but the machine
seems to be out of ice, and I just
purchased this.
Let me, uh, let me rework this.
You have stopped the flavor!
Yes, I did, because I don't even have a boating license.
Because I don't even have a boating license.
I suppose I could get one, but still Look, just chill out.
- Don't shoot.
- Don't shoot, please.
Really, I'm just a theater major.
Time to have some refried fries, fry man.
Time to have some refried fries, fry man.
This is a freakin' suit!
The bun is in your mind.
Meatwad? Meat dead?
Meatwad? Meat dead?
Make dead meat, more like it.
- No, wait.
- Don't shoot!
- It's me, Moltar.
- Ha ha ha ha ha!
No, see, he was beggin' to die, so I mangled him, ate him,
and put on his skin as a joke. Ha ha!
Ha ha! Huh?
And you're wondering why you didn't get
the cup with your little face on it?
Aaaaahhh! I'm dead.
I guess that's the end of your little
Wait. Before I ascend into
heaven free of all sin, I have a few
other thoughts I'd like to share.
Since I will no longer be working in television, which will
sadden advertisers and prevent me
from appearing with guns n' roses
at Philly's first union center in January,
because I'll be dead
I think I said that earlier.
So, to summarize,
classic rock will be forever changed.
Oh, no.
And I'm making a movie with axl rose.
It starts off in the desert Quickly, to the houseboat.
Where we are both hungry, and scorpions roam the earth.
Everybody buckled in?
To the club!
$4.00? For what?
Hey, baby, said the way you quake
gonna drink us down some master shake
you got a thirst you wanna quench
drive on down to burger trench
eat yourself a big meatwad
with honey mustard dipping sauce
you want an affordable place to dine
feed your kids for $3.99
what have I done to the future of classic rock?
Hey, baby, oh, baby, pretty baby
no one's under pressure now
Space Ghost: Nooooo!
- Hello?
- God, are you there?
Is this heaven, or am I in television?
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