Speechless (2016) s03e04 Episode Script

N-E-- NEW JJ

1 Right, extra time for tests, consultation with a college counselor with disability experience.
Any other requests for your big meeting? "Nah.
It's your thing.
You got this, Moms.
" Moms.
Is that you or him? Me.
But you had to ask.
He's getting cooler.
Well, that's it, then.
Our very last IEP.
Would you like to mark the occasion in any way at all? Would you? No.
All right, well, you're gonna hate this, then.
Y'all ready for this Let's get ready for JJ's final IEP ever! The last chance for your mother to fight for all the services you need to make this last school year awesome.
Awesome.
Awesome.
Hey, JJ, I was skeptical, but I'm a sucker for merch.
[LAUGHS.]
And now, at 5'10 and an age she won't even disclose to her husband, give it up for the hero of the IEP, Maya DiMeo!! Yeah.
Whoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! - JIMMY: And it's time for Dylan.
- MAYA: Dylan! ALL: Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Go, Dylan! Are we ready to do it? Wait, if you're Dylan, who's the bear? [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES.]
Was it the guy who brought the balloons? JJ, what is with you and this jacket? It's a weird color.
Zippers give you trouble.
"Somebody said" Yeah, yeah, somebody said that you looked like Pat Sajak in it once.
But since when is that the bar? Let's lose it.
"Zip it.
" Sorry.
I can't be part of this.
W dude, you did it! I thought you couldn't do zippers.
"So did I.
Someone said I couldn't when I was six and I never tried since.
Wonder what else I can do.
" Well, let's find out! Let's do some stuff no one thinks you can! [SCHOOL BELL RINGS.]
Wait, you tried talking, right? Dylan, we're gonna go see Devon's band tonight at 9:00.
- You in? - 9:00? No, thanks.
I'll be making Z's.
What time do you go to bed? Well, my bedtime is 8:00, but I get screen time in bed till 8:15.
Perks of being in high school.
You got bed at 8:00 every night? Yeah, my parents always say, "10 hours of sleep is what a growing girl needs.
" Yeah, my whole family goes to bed early.
Okay What? Ray, is my bedtime super early? "10 hours of sleep is what a growing girl needs.
" - All right, let's do this.
- Whoa, whoa.
Don't you know the pre-drive safety checklist? I'm sorry.
I didn't have a lot of time to study.
Junior year, you know how it is SATs, researching colleges.
Look, kid, I wear a lot of hats at this school.
Low-stakes stuff.
I teach some Spanish wrong, they don't know donde the biblioteca is.
The world keeps spinning.
If you blow off drivers ed, people die! If you can't handle the duties of a high school junior without committing vehicular manslaughter, get out of this car! Now, I'm sure it's not lost on any of you that this is our last IEP.
And what a wonderful journey we've shared together.
You know, that being said, I will haunt you to your graves if I don't get exactly what I Maya.
Sorry to interrupt, but um, JJ's been on a self-empowerment kick.
Do you mind if, uh, he makes some requests? Oh, no! No, not at all.
That's wonderful, darling.
Go on.
Uh, "number one, I'd like unlimited time for tests, instead of time and a half.
" "Number two, I'd like to take tests in a private space.
" Oh, I didn't think of that.
You know, I was also thinking, if we "Number three" And "36, scheduling flexibility to accommodate attendance of college community classes.
" Goodness, JJ, such initiative.
It is with great pride that I say to all your requests, "We will look into them.
" When did you become so ambitious, darling? "I zipped my zipper today.
" What? But you can't zip your zipper.
"Turns out I can.
I can do a lot of things I thought people had to do for me.
" Oh, uh, do my zipper for 'em.
[LAUGHS.]
Okay, this was a bad idea.
And then he ran the meeting all by himself.
Well, that's great, right? Of course.
I've always wanted JJ to take care of himself.
But standing there listening to him do what I've done all these years, well, if he takes care of JJ, then what do I do? I got a C on my English paper! Junior year's too hard! I'm gonna fail my classes, not get into college, get a job delivering pizzas, but I failed drivers ed so I'm gonna kill 50 people on my first day and spend the rest of my life behind bars making other prisoners my "B"! You'll make them Uh-huh.
My life is over! When God closes a door, he annihilates one of our children.
What a day! I'll be in bed soon, too.
- Good night, Princess.
- Good night.
- Night Jenga? - Uh So, you all coincidentally decided to break your bedtimes tonight? Okay, here's the deal.
Three kids are a lot.
Bedtime is a parent's only reprieve.
JJ and Ray aging out of bedtime was bad enough.
And when it came time to give yours up, we just thought, "What if we don't?" And for what it's worth, we didn't think you'd find out.
You two let this happen? We like the downtime, too.
"You can be loud.
" Well, your wheelchair makes a low humming noise sometimes.
Look, look, this is mostly my doing.
I-I need my alone time.
These guys are not up much later than you.
Then I'm coming for you.
I'm never sleeping again.
You owe me night.
Yeah, I-I Ohh, how sweet it is.
Yeah.
Oh! Hey, I-I thought this was your free period.
"This looks fun.
I want in.
" You want to play? No, you can't be in here gambling with adults.
"'Can't'? Who are you, a zipper?" - [LAUGHTER.]
- What are you laughing at? You don't even know what that's referring to.
Uh, it's referring to you, zipper.
[LAUGHTER.]
- Out of my way, punk! - Ugh, I'm sorry, I've already given my lunch money to Corbin.
- I got you.
- Wait, Mom? What are you doing here? Is something wrong with JJ? No, no, no, no, I just had a bit more time on my hands.
So, you know, I know how upset you were about that C.
So I thought I'd come down here and talk to your jerk teacher.
You talked to my teacher about my C? Yeah, it's a B-plus now.
Oh, I'm sorry, was I overstepping? No, Mom, that's amazing.
Thank you.
You know, if you need more help, I'm happy to give it.
No pressure.
I mean, if it's not too much trouble.
Yeah, 'cause, I mean, I do have a bit more time now Enough games, I want it all.
Now, where's that Corbin? I am hugging my mom in the hallway, so he should be here any second.
Please just go to bed.
I promise you're not missing anything.
That's exactly what someone who stays up late doing something awesome would say.
Actually, what I like to do at night is read John Steinbeck's classic, "The Grapes of Wrath".
Out loud.
Your threat relies on me knowing that book is boring.
- And I don't.
- [SIGHS.]
Fine.
You want to see what I do? It's dumb stuff like this.
I don't fight crime.
I don't make inventions.
But we have a lot going on.
And I need to turn off my brain and recharge my battery with dumb stuff that doesn't matter.
Oh, my God, Dad, you just made five in a row.
Six.
Seven.
- Eight, nine, ten.
- Dad, you're awesome.
Are you the reason I'm awesome? Um, your mom's asleep, so yeah.
Yes.
Well, you clearly use this time.
I don't want to get in the way.
Maybe someday, you'll show me the other stuff you can do.
Okay.
Unless I can show you right now MAYA: There he is.
- "Maya DiMeo presents Ray's Junior Year.
" - "Ray's Junior Year.
" Yeah.
Study schedules, college prep, realistic goals and benchmarks.
And I hope you don't mind, but I took the liberty of identifying a few dating prospects I think you might have overlooked.
Have you really given Amy P.
a chance? Mom, this is so overly detailed and intense.
- I love it! - I knew you would.
Right, let's practice the line I taught you to say to girls.
Now you tell me your interests.
Very good.
See, I've labeled them Monday through Friday.
That way, you don't have to waste any brain space figuring out what to wear to school.
I am loving that Tuesday look.
Me, too! Oh, hey, guys.
You see Tuesday? "Mom's help can be nice.
But you need boundaries.
" JJ, the only boundary I need is between me and your jealousy.
Mom's been all about you.
Now it's Ray's turn.
Ray, before we go to the store, would you like to use the bathroom? You've had a lot of juice.
I have.
And I shall.
Thank you, Mother.
There we go.
Do the honors.
The perfect paper airplane.
Bet you it stays up there for five minutes.
You lose.
That was the most perfect spitball I've ever seen in my life! I could, um [YAWNS.]
I could show you how to do it.
Nah, it's getting late.
You should get to bed.
But you were gonna list all of the presidents in order of height.
Number eight might surprise you.
I'll go put on another pot.
Whoa.
Since when do you drink coffee? Since I realized how awesome you were at night.
10 worst parents of all time Number one will not surprise you.
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS.]
"Oh, no, I left my big history paper at home.
Will you get it?" Oh, oh, Mr.
Powers, can you do me a favor? Are you Ellen DeGeneres' exclusive online content? No? Then why are you talking to me during my free period? Uh, I-I just need you to help JJ while I go get his paper.
Oh, it's for JJ? Then, sure! Be right back.
Oh, people hang out in here? Bleak! JJ, you wanna play? Uh, "deal me in.
" Oh, wait, sorry, now that I know what you're going for, let me take that again.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
"Deal me in.
" Wait, you play poker in here for money during your free period? Oh, I don't know "I'm taking charge of my own life.
I zipped my zipper.
I just need you to help me.
" I read for JJ.
He's an even bigger zipper than your normal guy.
Maya, are you home? I'm here for JJ's history pap Mother's at the grocery.
And I'm taking a day off to rest.
Mother says, "Mental health is just as important ashysical health.
" I'm just looking for JJ's history paper, man.
Oh, got it.
[ELVIS PRESLEY'S "A LITTLE LESS CONVERSATION" PLAYS.]
Ooh! Boom! You are so good at this! Now, let's make this the best possible drivers ed experience for my Ray.
What's holding you back? Well, okay, well, I'm not big on lefts Hmm, "no left turns.
" What else? Uh, I don't really know what "yield" means? Forget that one.
Nobody does.
- What else? - The driver instructor.
He's tough love.
I find I'm more of a praise-based learner.
I'll be tackling that at the meeting.
- What meeting? - Dr.
Miller, the driving instructor, and I will be meeting to discuss how best to serve your individual drivers ed needs.
That sounds a lot like those IEP things you do for JJ.
I know.
Isn't that great? 'Cause I thought I'd done my last IEP.
"Just when I thought I was out they pull me back in!" Uh I feel like it was more, you were out and they were okay with that, and you, uh, you forced your way back in.
Hoo-wa! - I fold.
- I fold, too.
Oh, this is intense.
Maybe quit while you're ahead.
Oh All of it? "I won all that, didn't I?" "I know he's bluffing.
He has a tell.
He's doing it right now.
" Okay, enough, JJ! "I know what I'm doing.
I Z-I-P "zipped my zipper.
" I don't understand why you keep bringing that up! All right, you're out of cash.
If you want to stay in the game, what else do you got? So did you win? DR.
MILLER: Thank you for coming.
How are things at home, Jimmy? Well, you know, Dad drinks more than I'd like, and Mom's just kind of checked out You mean my current home.
Good! They're good.
Good.
I'd like you to take a look at Dylan.
[BAND PLAYING.]
[SIGHS.]
She looks kind of tired, huh? Is there any reason why she wouldn't be getting enough sleep? - I think I know what this is about.
- Mm-hmm.
It won't be easy, but I can fix it.
I'm a dad.
I make things better.
Oh, good.
Yeah, one thing at a time.
Nothing.
Don't worry about it.
Ray, I've got a surprise for you Ta-da! I made it for you.
That way, if you need me, you don't have to get up.
You can just roll right over.
Isn't this basically a wheelchair? Save your voice for the debate club.
But if you absolutely need to speak, here's this.
Look at you.
[GASPS.]
You're perfect, JJ.
I'm Ray! I'm Ray! Aaaah! Aah! Oh, thank God.
It was just a terrible, plausible dream.
Where are you going, Ray? Uh, I should probably get to school.
I think I can make my last class.
But not drivers ed, right? Because we still have to discuss your special needs - I mean, your needs.
- I don't think we need to have that meeting.
I mean, it has been great.
"Has been"? What a ridiculous tense to use for a clearly ongoing situation.
- Unless you want me to stop - No, no, I just I just don't want to feel like I'm hogging you.
You know, there's other people that need you like Dylan and And Pepper and I should really go.
- [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES.]
- Ray How could you let him take your chair? "He won it fair and square.
" Why did that dumb game matter to you so much? "I want to do things by myself.
" You've been doing tons by yourself.
The IEP, the zipper.
Plus, you really made "zipper" happen as an insult.
But it can't all happen at once.
You gotta be patient.
"All I've ever been is patient.
" JJ, I get it.
But listen, man, here's the good news What you did today is just because you're stupid.
Yeah, it had nothing to do with any disability.
You just didn't know when to stop.
You're moving.
Fast.
But we all need to know our limits.
"Can you help me get my chair back?" Yeah.
I can do business with the janitor.
I know his price.
[YAWNING.]
Man, what is with me? Yeah, let Daddy top you off.
I-I've had, like, a gallon.
It's It's not doing anything.
Well, maybe it's your body's way of telling you that this late-night thing has run its course.
But I love it Us doing stupid stuff, no distractions, no responsibilities.
I have a pretty big responsibility.
Oh, come on, Jimbo.
I mean, you've been the one giving me all the coffee.
Wait! Is this decaf? How could you? You gave me no choice.
It turns out, a growing girl really does need her sleep.
And you know, maybe when you're done growing, you and I will be the king and queen of the night.
You do magic, too?! Go to bed, sweetheart.
No.
No.
I'll just rest my eyes for, like, a minute.
And then [YAWNS.]
I'll be good to go You're pretty magic yourself.
[HORNS HONK.]
WOMAN: Hey, watch it! MAN: Look out! Take the next right.
You got this, Ray.
[HORN HONKS.]
Ray! You're doing wonderfully! Mom! Why are you here?! To give you the positive reinforcement you require and this healthful smoothie.
- Oh.
- Could you just Ooh, bugger! [TIRES SCREECH.]
Ray! That smoothie looked delicious! I need to get away from my mom! Hey! A left! Bravo, darling! Oi, compliment him.
It's how he learns.
Right.
Yeah, uh, uh, g-good job, Ray.
Way to, uh, close your eyes every time you turn.
[TIRES SQUEAL.]
- We're gonna die! - Oh, relax! Amanda, if we don't make it out of this alive, I want you to know that I love you.
I love you, too.
Hey, I thought we kinda had a thing happening? - Sorry, no.
- Oh, definitely not.
- [HORN HONKS.]
- You did great, love! Ray, stop! Oh! Well, you That was pretty good.
Leave me alone, Mom! I can't be your new JJ.
You have to find something else.
Way to go, Ray.
You failed great! Oh, hey, I missed you.
"Not so easy to replace me, is it?" No.
Darling, I'm so proud of you.
The way you've taken control of your life.
Your future is so bright.
But when I think about my future, I have no idea what my life looks like with less of you.
"I know how you'd H-E help me.
" [WHEELCHAIR BEEPS.]
Let's get ready for Mom's first IEP.
"How can we make this next year the best year yet?" That's so sweet of you.
Well? I'd just really like to know who was in the bear costume.
Six months of this.
[SCOFFS.]
That janitor is a shrewd negotiator.
"It's worth it.
" Hm.
You know what else could be worth it? Poker lessons.
Hey.
Wha? "Wow, I never knew I could do that.
" [SNORTS.]
Nice try.
[LAUGHS.]

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