Suburgatory (2011) s03e08 Episode Script

Catch and Release

It's inevitable.
Sometimes, your friends are going to make decisions that you just don't agree with.
I think I'm gonna cut bangs.
And sometimes, your only job is to be supportive.
I think I'm gonna dye my bangs pink.
But if you watch your friend make a decision that can hurt them without speaking up I'm so sick of these bangs.
I think I'm just gonna burn them off.
then what kind of friend are you? - Lisa, no! - Aah! - Oh, God.
- Ow.
And the latest bad decision So, this weekend's the big weekend.
The big weekend for what? My parents are going out of town, so I'm gonna ask Malik for his hand in marriage.
It's gonna be the most perfect proposal ever.
I'm gonna sweep that boy off his feet.
You said that already.
Lisa, come on.
Aren't we a little young to be thinking about marriage? Okay, first of all, we are not thinking about marriage.
I am.
And while I may be young in age, I have lived well beyond my 17 years.
I am an old soul, Tessa.
- I was born old.
- Right.
Also, Malik is your first real boyfriend.
And he also happens to be my soul mate.
Look, I know that you have yet to experience that kind of love Here we go.
but just because you and Ryan didn't last doesn't mean that we won't.
That's a fair shot.
But I still don't see what the rush is.
True love is the rush, Tessa.
True love is urgent and pressing and in need of our immediate attention.
This proposal is going down with or without you, so get on board or step to the left, because this train is leaving the station.
Suburgatory 3x08 - Catch and Release Original air date March 26, 2014 Okay.
Oh, hey, Monique.
I need you to make more of an effort with the drains.
Uh, I will.
You know, you always say that, but the hair in our pipes tells a different story.
I'm sorry.
I don't want you to be sorry.
I just want you to be better at your job.
Hand me my purse.
"Please" and "thank you"? What was that? - Nothing.
- Rough day? Not at all.
It was actually kind of slow.
So, uh, what are you thinking for dinner? Okay, Geoff, I need you to pick the squeakies up off the floor and put them where they belong.
I feel like you're a teenager that I constantly have to tell to clean his room.
Clean your room, Geoff.
Clean your room.
How about Indian? There's great shrimp korma down the street.
Do you think there's such a thing as soul mates? I know you have yet to experience that kind of love.
What the? Why does everyone keep saying that to me? But yeah.
Yeah, I think soul mates exist.
I just think it's extremely hard to identify them.
I just don't understand how you can be sure that you've met the one.
You can't be sure.
But you need to be sure, which is what makes the prospect of marriage so daunting.
Lisa doesn't think it's daunting.
She knows she wants to marry Malik, and she thinks I'm being a bad friend for not being supportive.
Well, being blindly supportive does not make you a good friend.
Being honest does.
But now that you've been honest, you have to back off.
It's Lisa's decision, not yours.
You can't let it ruin your friendship.
Uh not today, buddy.
We're gonna take a little break.
From what? Doggie day care? No, from Nora.
Yesterday, she was seriously bossy and borderline rude.
Did you call her on it? No.
That would have been rude.
You have to be honest, George.
You have to be honest, and you can't let it ruin your friendship.
A wise man told me that.
Yeah, and a wise-ass repeated it.
So, I know the train is leaving the station, and I just want you to know that I am on board.
Then let me see your ticket.
Seriously? Seriously.
This means so much to me.
I'm gonna keep this.
And I know marrying Malik seems crazy to you.
But to me, it's crazy not to.
My parents married young.
Malik's parents married young.
We were bred for long-term monogamy.
It's in our DNA.
Well, I think that's great.
I think it's great that you know what you want and you're going for it.
I'm going for it.
Go for it! - Hi.
- Hello.
I was happy for Lisa.
So why did I feel sad? As Lisa rushed towards the altar, George took the opposite approach.
Before things got any further along with Nora, he decided to do a background check.
Oh, hey.
Nora's not in today.
Yeah, no.
I know.
I I just stopped by to pick up this ball with the fake mustache attached to it.
That's a really popular item.
Oh, hey, George.
You know, Nora's not in today.
Yeah, no.
I know.
He just stopped in for the mustache ball.
Those are a riot.
Uh you know what? Since I have you both here, you mind if I ask you a question? Shoot.
Uh, is Nora a bitch? That was blunter than I had intended.
Here's the thing.
I know I'm putting you in a very uncomfortable position, and I apologize, but I can't tell you how many times this has happened to me.
I get involved with someone, I think I know who they are, and then bam they turn out to be somebody else.
And yesterday I have to get back.
Yesterday, Monique, I glimpsed something.
And I want to know if I saw what I think I saw.
Is Nora a big old bitch? Or not? Is she a bossy boots? You tell me, Geoff.
Don't lie to me, buddy.
That will be $13.
48, please.
While George proceeded with caution, I was mad at myself for not throwing it to the wind.
Watching Lisa carpe diem put me to shame.
She knew what she wanted, and she wasn't gonna let it get away.
I certainly wasn't ready to marry my ex-boyfriend Ryan.
But that doesn't mean I should have let him get away without a fight.
I had to go see him.
But since I didn't have a credit card Is this gonna be enough? Could you please not put that on my chair? Money is filthy, and I seriously can't believe you still use it.
Uh, where do you want me to put it? In the hamper.
I'm showing three direct flights to Orlando.
You know, make that two.
I don't like the equipment Delta uses on that route.
Looks like I can get you a bulkhead, which is good, 'cause you have one.
Are you gonna need a rental car? Um I don't exactly know where I'm going yet.
I still need to get Ryan's dorm info.
Mid-size or luxury? I see you in a Yaris or something comparable.
You're 25, right? No.
Not right.
We go to school together.
I know.
But you seem like you've been left back a lot.
Thanks a lot for coming through for me, Dalia.
I really owe you one.
No probs.
It was seriously my pleasure.
Why is my return flight to Lebanon? Like I told you, my pleasure.
Enjoy your trip.
Tessa! Come in.
Hi, Mrs.
I was wondering if you had Ryan's dorm info.
Oh, did you have something you want to deliver to Ryan, because we can hand-deliver it.
Big game tomorrow.
Shay clan is gonna be there to support him in more ways than one.
Ryan gets so pent-up before the games.
- You remember.
- He needs release.
They paid for my ticket.
It'll be good for you two lovebirds to see each other.
Anyways, Tessa, what was it that you had for Ryan? Oh, right.
Um it was just, uh this bag of my old clothes.
Well, I'm sure he'll love this.
That is gonna have to be your carry-on, dear, because mine is full of deer jerky and June's is nothing but boy shorts.
This is some real healthy fare you got going here tonight, Tracy.
I'm just trying to keep dad's cholesterol in check, ma.
You don't like it? No, I I like it.
A little fibrous is all.
Like something you'd feed a horse.
I like it, aunt Tracy.
Thank you, Shira.
Would you care for some more? Oh, no.
What's this over here? That's quinoa, dad.
Tastes like dirt.
Okay, let's change the subject, shall we? Lisa, anything new? Funny you should ask.
There actually is something I'd like to share with the family.
Last year, as you know, Malik and I split up briefly.
It was one of the darkest times of my life.
Prior to that, my karaoke song had always been "I'm So Excited" by The Pointer Sisters.
Ooh, that's a good one.
But during that time, I felt like I was just going through the motions, so my karaoke song became "Automatic" by The Pointer Sisters.
I like that one, too.
But then we reconciled.
And I've never been happier.
So, tonight, my karaoke song became "Jump," by The Pointer Sisters.
And I'd like to sing that for you now.
Uh, whoa, what's going on? Sounds like she's gonna sing us some Pointer Sisters.
All right.
Okay, Lisa! Oh, okay That's a bad girl.
Malik will you marry me? - What? - What? Oh, hell, no.
But I want to spend the rest of my life with him.
- Well, that's too bad.
- Malik's going to Howard next year, Lisa.
He applied early acceptance.
You did? I I was gonna tell you if I got in.
I haven't heard anything yet.
But you will.
We're not gonna let you throw away your future to marry some country-ass white girl who wants to be a child bride.
I'm not a child.
Neither is Malik.
Now, that's a grown man there, speak for himself.
Speak for yourself, Malik.
Do you want to marry me or not? Lisa, wait! You didn't give me a chance to explain.
Can you stop crying for long enough to tell me what happened? The train went off the rails.
Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed.
I guess he doesn't feel the way I do.
What exactly did he say? It's not what he said.
It's what he didn't say.
He didn't say yes.
I'm sorry, Lisa.
Are you? Yes.
Hey, I was on that train.
I showed you my ticket.
As bad as I felt for Lisa, I had to admit I also felt relieved relieved that Lisa wasn't marrying Malik, and relieved that I wouldn't have to see Ryan and June dancing at her wedding.
Heard you stopped by my job not looking for me.
Well well, I was actually just picking up one one of those.
Can I ask you a question? What's going on with you, George? Nothing.
What's what's going on with you? We've been hanging out for months now, and just when I finally feel like it's getting somewhere I catch you being a big old bitch.
What? Super rude to your employees no "please" or "thank yous", a total bossy boots.
"Bossy boots"? I'm done getting duped, sister.
I I've been done getting duped.
Who's duping you? Am I pretending like I'm someone I'm not? So, I'm a little bossy at work.
I'll cop to that.
But I'm the boss.
Look, there's a million reasons not to be with someone.
They grind their teeth, or they hog the blankets.
I I certainly hope not, because those are both deal breakers.
But when you're into someone, none of that other stuff matters.
You know, even if they do have a poorly trained dog and a hang-up on their ex and a teenage daughter and more facial hair than you'd typically like.
When you fall for someone, none of that other stuff matters.
George knew what Nora was saying was true, and he also knew, in that moment, that he hadn't fallen for her.
I should go.
I should let you.
Well, thanks again for including me.
It was really great getting a chance to see Ryan play.
Listen, I, uh I don't want you to beat yourself up.
I'm not.
It wasn't your fault.
I know.
I was in the stands.
I'm not the one who fumbled.
Oh, boy.
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's just a little strange that Ryan has never fumbled before in his life.
I think we can all agree that the most logical explanation is that some unholy force was at work.
It could have also been the rain.
It's not like you put a curse on our son.
Please, take your curse off our son.
Okay, you know, I'm just gonna head out.
Drive safely.
You know, Ryan's roommate never even left the room.
So, we didn't get a chance to Oh, my God.
Why didn't you say so? - That's it.
- Explains it all! How about a nice, warm breakfast? Oh, Sheila scrambles a terrific egg.
I do.
It had been a while since Lisa had slept over.
And even though it was more of a suicide watch than a slumber party, I was still glad I could be there for her.
I was thinking maybe I gave up on the bangs too quickly.
I don't know.
With graduation looming, it was just a matter of time before life sent us in our own separate directions, - but for now - Lisa! You're my best friend.
I couldn't imagine my life without you.
Lisa Marie Shay will you marry me? Yes.
Sometimes you have to let go.
There's no other choice.
In Lisa's case, I knew she'd be back.
We were best friends, and nothing was going to change that.
But as far as my own love story goes I guess we just have to wait and see about that.