Summer Heights High (2007) s01e05 Episode Script
Episode 5
Well, one of my big duties, and I've been doing it for the last five years or so, is evacuation procedures.
A fire in the school, everyone.
There's a fire.
There's a fire in the school.
Get out quick! I find that I use my acting skills to create the drama of the situation.
Christ, I can't believe this is happening.
Oh, oh, Christ! It adds a lot of realism and it really freaks the kids out.
Miss Allen from the library has got third-degree burns One big problem that a lot of schools are having to deal with at the moment is terrorism.
It's a big issue.
So, I have a drill which caters for that too.
There's a terrorist attacking the school.
I'm serious.
Get down.
Get in a tight ball, everyone And I also do what I call a random drill, which is, I just spring some kind of emergency onto the kids and we see how they deal with it.
There's a kid in the school with a gun.
There's a kid with a gun.
There's kids down.
Go.
I'm serious.
Mrs Wong, get them out.
There's a paedophile in the school.
There's a paedophile.
He's in the school - get out.
He's on the school grounds.
Yes, I think a school with a good evacuation procedure is a school that survives.
That'll be at lunchtime on Friday.
And it'll be in full costume, so you boys can get used to the skirts.
What if you can't be fucked doing it on the day? Well, I've just come back from a weekend workshop on EPBSM, which is extreme behavioural problem student management.
I want to see Thomas, Joseph, Leon and Jonah up the front here, and the rest of you can go.
What the fuck for, sir? Come and talk to me, boys.
What they've found is that if you have a problem child and you give them extra responsibility, then they can rise to it.
I want to assign to you a group of Year 7 boys who are not coping well in the school.
I'll assign one to each of you and I want you to be what I call a'big brother' to them.
No way, sir.
That sucks.
No way.
We hate Year 7 s.
It's a shit idea.
OK, hear me out.
Now, Jonah, you 'd be the leader.
It's not our fault they've got no friends.
It's not your fault.
But as an added incentive, if you can do this program seriously, I'll let you do a breakdancing demo at assembly on Poly day.
Thanks, sir.
So, man.
You 've gotta do the program.
You 're a legend, sir.
OK, alright? Let's go, boys.
Look, I'll come and introduce you to them at recess.
Yeah, sure.
Thank you.
Alright.
Roll it, roll it, keep it sexy.
Remember, you 're having the best night of your lives.
Wiggle the bum more, please, Candice.
We are midway through rehearsals for 'A nnabel Dickson The Musical'.
And the machine, I call it, is finding its rhythm.
Remember, Annabel really going off.
You 've taken the ecstasy.
These are the sort of schoolyard bin, um, but we've sort of we've added this lighting effect.
These are lovely.
These are our school benches.
If you can imagine coming on These are the ecstasy pills, which are a lightweight polystyrene for for dancing purposes.
These are for the cutters - the kids that are into the cutting on the arms.
So, various sort of suicidal themes, which the teenagers are into.
A noose, and we sort of simulate a hanging sort of thing.
I'm finding that I'm weaving the character of Mr G into the musical a lot more than I expected I would.
# She's a naughty girl with a bad habit # Bad habit # Sell it to me, Mr G.
Matthew is my dream Mr G.
He's got the look.
He's a very I mean, he's a good-Iooking boy.
# She's a naughty girl with a bad habit # And these are our costume ladies.
Say hello, mums.
Hello.
Hello.
They're doing a variation on the school uniform.
Um, and just tizzing it up with some more stage-friendly fabrics.
These are our slut outfits.
The slut outfits that the girls will be wearing in the nightclub scene.
Your Rosie's gonna look lovely in that on stage, Mrs Travis, isn't she? Yeah.
I'll leave you to it.
We haven't got long, so don't Less chat, more sewing.
OK, guys, listening, please? Raise your hands in the air if you 're happy with the new girls' school uniform concept.
It's been an amazing week.
I've set up a Student Representative Council, an SRC, and all my friends are in it, and Ashley, 'cause she begged to be in it.
And we're doing what we can to make some really cool changes around the school.
Uh, mobile phones allowed in class for texting purposes only.
Oh, it's a bit distracting.
Overruled.
I'm president, Ashley.
The school grounds around here are so crap, seriously.
So, I'm thinking, like, Diet Coke machines along there, guys.
The mirrors in the girls' toilets are really crap and dirty.
They're disgusting.
They're so small.
We really wanna get big ones, like, really massive ones, like, full-length so you can see your footwear.
We need another cleaner.
Let's get, like, two more full-time cleaners.
We wanna get a girls-only Year 11 common room where there's, like, laptops and stuff for everyone That would be so cool.
Just chill out.
So, there's, like, wireless Internet and, like, you know, so we can just chat on MSN at lunchtimes to each other.
Yeah, like, an Indian kind of thing.
Yeah.
These should be higher.
They're so low, guys.
Look what I have to do.
Awesome idea.
Let me get that down.
What about a study room? Ashley, shut up, please.
One of the big things that we're doing, and I'm so excited about it, is we're doing a Year 11 formal.
Can't believe you guys have never had one here.
No, we did, but they banned it 'cause they think it's a distraction.
Is that why? Oh, I thought it was the povo factor.
You 've been to about five, haven't you? Yeah.
Well, six, actually.
It's really embarrassing.
Six formals? Yeah, six formals.
I started going in Year 7.
I wanna show these guys how to have a good time.
Just 'cause you go to a public school, doesn't mean you can't go off, you know? Fuck.
Fuck.
We never should've fuckin' agreed to this.
They look gay as.
They look like they don't even have pubes.
Come on down, boys.
These are your Year 7 little brothers.
And, guys these are your Year 8 mentors.
You guys have to find each other - every morning, every recess, every lunchtime.
And you younger guys, you know like we talked about, if you have any issues, any problems, you talk to your big brother.
Alright, now, Jonah, as team leader, I thought you might like to run a little 'getting to know you ' session.
So, I'll leave you with that responsibility.
OK, sir.
OK, good luck, guys.
Fuck you.
Fuck.
You got the fat one - sucked in.
My one's a You got a fuckin' ranga.
And a fat one.
I'm gonna talk to them.
Don't talk to them.
We have to.
I'm not talking to them.
Screw you.
We have to.
If you want the breakdancing demo, we have to fuckin' do it.
Fuck you.
I'm not talking.
I'm gonna do it.
So, have you got problems? Nice new friends, Jonah.
Shut the fuck up.
They're not my friends, motherfucker.
I have to do it as a program.
They're homos.
So, um, 'P aedophile' Pete said that you 've got social problems or some shit.
The fat one, tell me first.
You are down like this.
I needed a fairly big space to put on the show and the hall wasn't big enough.
So, I've booked out the gym till the end of term.
Come in quietly, grab your balls and leave.
So, I'm phys ed's least favourite person at the moment.
Shut the door, please, David.
I decided that I'm going to do the show as an arena spectacular.
The arena-style seating will cascade upwards in a circular motion around.
We're hiring that in.
Normally, you play to the front of a stage.
Within the arena, it's all around.
It's around everywhere.
I'm performing there, there, there, there.
I'm using Toby, the Down syndrome boy.
He's back.
He auditioned for the show, didn't get in.
He was devastated.
So, I've brought him back as my assistant.
You need to get a highlighter and highlight these points for me.
He's really a sounding board if I have ideas.
We chat about that.
And, you know, he's my little creative adviser.
What do you think about getting Mr G and Celine to do two circuits instead of one? Yeah.
What do you think - one or two? I think, one.
You know, he sits at his desk.
He's not really allowed to leave the desk.
But, you know, he's getting to see how it works.
Where's a pen? Get me a pen, please.
I'm sorry, Ja'mie.
Um, we can't have the formal.
It's been a blanket rule now for five years that there are no formals Why not? Well, it's a distraction from school work and we just can't be held accountable for Seriously, sir! your actions at a formal, so We really wanted a formal.
It's a formal.
Just let us have it.
Ja'mie, girls, it's just not gonna happen, OK? Oh my God.
I can't believe that just happened.
I'm not taking no for an answer, guys.
We've gotta think of more ideas.
I really want the formal.
I just don't think there's anything.
Like, he will say no.
He was so definite, wasn't he? And he's got no good reasons.
" No, you can't have a formal because I say.
" He's just a dick.
We've gotta think of something else, guys.
We WILL think of something else.
There's nothing.
Shut up, guys.
I just thought of an idea.
What? Oh, my God.
We could do, like, a hunger strike.
Like, just don't eat.
Not eat at all? Don't eat, and say, "We'll keep not eating until you let us have the formal.
" Seriously.
No, we can get the whole of Year 11 involved.
We can go down to the oval Yes, and having a banner.
like, first period tomorrow, saying, like, "Give us a formal, or else!" Oh, my God.
That's great.
We should text everyone about it.
Hey, ranga.
Ranga! Go and get me a Strawberry Break from the canteen.
You pay for it.
Tell your ranga to do it.
We've worked out that there's some good things about having the little brothers around.
Like, you can make them do shit for you.
Like, do your homework.
Write this for me, bro.
OK.
Do neat writing - I have to hand this shit in.
It's kinda good, kinda bad.
They just make us do all this stuff that's, like, really mean.
Hey, ranga.
They call us names that we don't like.
They call me 'fatty'.
They call me 'ranga'.
They call me 'gay'.
Go and get me my bag from my locker.
And don't drop it.
Get me that strawberry milk first.
We have to be careful when teachers go past.
Gimme the ball! So, we make it look like we're doing the program well.
Just teaching the boys about some footy.
Hey, sir, just talking about life and social problems.
What do you need to know? Alright, carry on.
Yeah, so, little brother I want to thank you all for your role in meeting the deadlines with that.
So, thank you for that.
Sorry I'm late.
Now Sorry, rehearsal - hectic as.
Greg, I need a copy of your script for your show, please, 'cause Annabel's parents are very keen to read it and Yep.
OK? Yes.
Good.
Moving on.
The ramps should be done in the demountables today for the new special ed room.
So we'll be shifting the multimedia gear into that space that they've occupied.
Sorry, what's going where? Uh, special ed's moving into one of the demountables.
Temporarily? Uh, no, permanently.
I've had the room fixed up and there's ramps there and so on.
No, no, that's where we're putting the performing arts centre.
That's the site for the performing arts centre.
We agreed that we're gonna leave them empty so the department agrees to knock them down.
We've talked about it a million times.
Greg, drama's important, I know that.
But we haven't got the money Well, why do you think I'm working my head off on the production? So we do have the money to build it.
Look, I appreciate that.
I know you 're doing your very best.
But, I mean, I just can't change the plans now.
Now, Greg, a couple of the parents of the special ed kids have asked me why their children are not actually going to be in the production.
Special ed? The special ed kids didn't get through the audition.
Well, I'd like to see that they get an involvement in the production.
I mean, we can't have a school with prejudice and exclusivity and so on.
So, I'd like you to make sure those kids are included.
Well, I don't see why I should be making exceptions for kids that didn't get through the audition.
Well, Greg, I'm telling you to do that, please.
I don't want to have to ask you again.
Fine.
OK? Now, the last item Starving for the formal.
We're meeting on the oval first period.
Starving for the formal - see you on the oval.
Mr Cameron is totally gonna freak out when he sees the whole of Year 11 starving on the oval.
It's gonna be so cool.
Did you do around the lockers? Go around Year 11 lockers.
I think it's important to stand up for yourself.
When you really want something, you 've gotta go for it.
Do you know what I mean? Ja'mie, did you tell everyone it was first period? Yes, of course I did, idiot.
Keep it straight.
The banner looks awesome.
We're totally getting our point across anyway.
Yeah.
Are any of you guys hungry? We've been here for, like, 10 minutes.
You told me you were anorexic.
Obviously, you were lying.
You don't have to be a bitch to me.
I was.
Deal with it.
We're starving for a cause.
I know how to starve myself.
I'm just saying Get off the oval and get to class now! Oh, Mr Cameron, shit! Oh, my God! Sorry.
Stupid behaviour, Ja'mie.
Sorry, sir.
You girls are stupid for following.
We just want our formal, Mr Cameron.
Get to class.
Sorry, sir.
I'm really sorry.
Do you want Ms Murray involved? Jonah, Jonah, give me a second, please, mate.
Did you or did you not agree to put in a decent effort on this program? Yeah, but he pissed off.
It's not my fault he left.
Jonah, he left because he came to tell me that not only were you neglecting him, but that you decided it was appropriate to pick on him and call him names.
Yeah, I just made a comment about him being fat.
He is, sir.
Look at him.
Jonah, I gave him to you because he's not coping socially.
He called me a lard-arse homo.
Yeah, as a joke, idiot.
Do you think that's appropriate to say to a person with confidence issues, do you? You said his mother must have fucked a whale to get that much blubber.
Leon, don't make this worse.
He lifted my T-shirt and said I had manboobs.
Bullshit I did.
You know, I'm this close to banning the breakdancing demo on Poly day.
No fuckin' way, sir.
Yes, I am.
Yes.
Sorry, Lucas.
I was only punking you anyway.
That's not an excuse any more, Jonah.
I'm sick of this behaviour.
One last chance I'll give you.
Why don't you trust me for once, sir? Tomorrow - junior swimming carnival.
You and your mates are gonna chaperone your Year 7 little brothers for the whole day.
We get to breakdance if we do that? Yes, you can.
It's a deal? It's a deal, sir.
Come on, Lucas.
Come on, Lucas.
Teach you some moves.
See you at the swimming tomorrow, boys.
See you, sir.
We missed you, Lucas.
What did you say to him? What the fuck did you say to him? She's got no idea.
She doesn't have a showbiz bone in her body.
It hardly seems fair at all.
No bloody idea.
I'm trying to maintain a standard, I'm trying to put on a good show and I don't need bloody special education nightmares.
I'm not I don't want them in my show.
Just don't let it upset you, mate.
We should never have bloody taken them.
I remember the meeting.
Do you remember that meeting? We sat in there and they said all raise hands to special ed.
And I was hands down, no bloody way.
They're nothing but trouble.
I mean, they're great kids.
I love the kids, don't get me wrong.
I think they're wonderful.
Toby and I get along wonderfully.
But there's a time and a place, you know.
Mmm.
The kids themselves understood.
They came to the audition, they weren't good enough, they were told that They've had a life of not being good enough.
Surely they know it by now.
Do you know what we're getting? I mean, are they wheelchair or walking? I have no idea.
I mean, wheelchair, we're screwed 'cause we'll have to build ramps.
Although, some of the non-wheelchair ones aren't exactly easy on the eye.
You heard what happened at I can never remember the name.
They had this special education facility - health department closed them down.
What happened? Apparently, one of the parents found human faeces on the classroom floor.
Straight to the health department.
All the handicapped kids are gone within 48 hours.
What sort of teaching environment has poo on the floor? It's That's all it would take here, isn't it? Just a little bit of poo on the floor and they'd shut us down.
I think we should still not eat, right.
That should still happen.
The protest on the oval didn't really work, so I've come up with a new plan.
We can't.
We have to be strong.
I'm gonna go and see Mr Cameron.
I'm gonna tell him that I've started cutting my arms.
And, like, that's why I'm wearing the jumper.
I'm just gonna go in and go, " Oh, my God.
What do you want me to do? "Like, I'm gonna kill myself if you don't let us have it.
" Seriously, and if he doesn't let us have it then, then he's a bastard and it's like murder.
He should go to jail or something, 'cause I could die from cutting myself.
Sir, I'm seriously upset and I can't believe I'm doing this to myself.
But you said we couldn't have it and it was just humiliating for me.
And OK, well I think I'm gonna keep doing this until you let us have the formal.
OK, well, I'll have a chat to Doug Peterson about the cutting situation, OK? I've gotta get in contact with child protection services.
And we'll contact your parents as well and let them know what's going on, OK? Alternatively, I'm gonna put an idea to you, Ja'mie, and all you girls, that at the assembly next Friday, I'll be happy for the SRC to do a presentation for us.
We will review it and have a look and see where we stand on formals.
Oh, my God! Thank you, sir.
I love presentations.
Girls, don't let me down.
Oh, my God! This is where we always hang out for the swimming carnival.
We call it 'Fobs Hill'.
Hey, sir.
Sir.
Hey! Look at this.
We're doing my tag on every motherfucker.
Here's my dictation tag.
Get it? See where it's coming from.
Hey, Jonah's one.
It says, "Before I root you, are you over 16?" Get it? Over 16.
I mean Like, rooting.
The boys are doing it too.
The little brothers have all got the tag.
Show them the tag.
Show them the tags.
Makes them feel like they fit in socially with the group.
And, look, "68IOU 1.
" Looking after the little brothers is good.
I like being a leader.
Your boobs look fine.
We're all waiting for you.
It's good to teach them things.
I drew a Zinc bra on him.
See.
Give me the Zinc.
I wanna draw my dick on you.
A school that bans formals is a school than bans life.
Summer Heights High, you should be ashamed of yourself.
Firstly, formals can give hope.
They give povo people something to live for.
Lack of formals in a school can also seriously affect the development of a girl.
Without formals, you can seriously stunt girls socially and physically.
No offence, but it's not exactly fun around here.
A Year 11 formal could do so much for this school.
Let me explain.
Formals bring people together.
They bring groups together and remove the apartheid of the playground.
Emos.
Christians.
Asians.
Skanks.
Lesbians.
And hot girls all come together at the formal.
It's a social and cultural melting pot that goes off.
Emos can dance with the jocks.
Christians sit with skanks.
Asians share limos with lesbians.
And my group talks to the fugly girls.
That's right - formals bring people together.
We got really bored, so we got one of the little brothers to go and steal this sheet from one of the teacher's clipboards.
It's got the phone numbers of all the teachers.
So we're gonna punk them.
We're gonna take a photo of my bum 'cause our phone's it's a camera phone Press faster.
And then we're gonna send it to all the teachers.
Put Miss Wheatley in.
OK, Joseph, are you ready? Take a photo.
Oh, man, look at this photo.
Give it to Elliot.
Everyone look innocent.
Just do innocent shit.
I can't believe we're doing this shit.
This is it, boys.
School without a formal - action.
I hate school so much.
It's so bad.
Stop pushing, you fat sluts.
You 're a fat bitch.
You 're the fat bitch.
I hate you so much, you stupid Christian.
Freeze! See what I mean.
It's really bad.
School with a formal - action.
Wow, I love school so much.
Who's done the assignment? I have.
I did three.
It's such a great place to be.
Oh, my God, school is so cool.
It's such a happy environment.
Freeze! See what I mean.
It's a much better place to be.
So please, Mr Cameron, reconsider and let us have a Year 11 formal.
Before we go, I wanna give you guys an example of what you will look like going off on the dance floor at the formal.
Thank you, Ashley.
Fuck, man.
He knows, man.
He's worked it out.
How does he fuckin' know? Maybe he's coming for Elliot.
Elliot's got a white arse, bro.
Get yourself changed and go and sit out the front.
What are you fuckin' talkin' about You are a bloody idiot.
I'm sick of it.
If your boyfriend's been sending you photos, it's not my fault.
It's not him, sir.
Check the number.
It's probably one of the Year 7 s.
I know what I saw and I know it belongs to you.
How do you know what my arse looks like, sir? Have you been thinking about it? Yeah? You can forget about the breakdancing offer.
It's off.
Well, I don't even care, anyway.
You 've stuffed it up.
That's bullshit.
We don't even wanna do that shit.
We just wanna make it fun for the little brothers.
This is not on.
It's NOT on.
Now, just get your stuff and get out of my sights.
They wanted to start it.
Delete the photo, sir.
You can't keep it for your private collection.
# School's hard sometimes # You just can't get by # You need something fast # To get you high # Marijuana or maybe ecstasy # Stop! No # Take this advice from me # Pick her up, drop the dog.
And # Don't get involved with drugs # Just fill your life with hugs # Don't get in Don't get involved with drugs # Good.
We have some visitors.
Stop you there.
Thanks, Rodney.
Just talk amongst yourselves, guys.
Hi.
Mr Gregson, I'd like you to meet your latest cast members.
Diane and Jonathan.
Hello.
Um, Jonathan, if I can get you to come on through and meet the rest of the cast.
Guys, we have some new cast members.
Toby, you might wanna talk to Yes, how are you going? Oh, not too bad.
How's the, um, new special ed centre going? Oh, fine.
No problems at all.
Yeah, they're pretty messy rooms down there, the demountables.
Well, they can be stuffy.
Dirty.
Well, we've had the cleaners in this morning.
They've steam-cleaned the carpet.
It looks brilliant.
Oh, did you? I've just come from there, actually.
And nothing to report, then? No, no, no.
It's, no, going very well.
Yeah, the room's terrific.
Yes.
And, uh, things going well here for you, then? Yeah, yeah, it's good.
It's all coming along.
Mmm.
Alright, Greg.
Well, look, I'll leave it to you.
And thanks very much for not making a fuss.
Yes right.
Thanks.
Much appreciated.
Hello.
I'll get you up on the stage.
Rodney, can I get you to jot down, uh, ramps and masks, please? Now, I've spoken to Ms Murray about this issue.
Uh, and we agree that if the SRC are that keen, and they promise to organise everything, then we will go ahead with the formal.
OK, we'll have to move on, so let's have the music off.
Thank you, girls, please.
Just turn the music off, thanks.
Got a few other things to get through.
I'm goin' there.
Come on, then.
Why don't you come and get me? What are we gonna do? Stand here all day? Maybe.
You got your pants wet, sir.
We are on in 10 days.
Greg's really feeling the strain at the moment.
Look like a bloody brain-dead retard.
I'm really a big pussy cat.
Don't push me, Margaret.
You called her daughter a walrus.
Through the hoop.
Stop looking at me.
Oh, whoops.
# Want to go to school # That was shit.
Year 11 formal tickets.
Hand up if you think we should invite the lesbians.
It's such a good look going with a disabled guy.
I went with a black guy to my Year 10 formal for the same reason.
The formal committee's decided that lesbians can come to the formal.
I know you 're into girls.
I think it's a really good idea.
Don't freak out.
I'm gonna bash the shit out of that motherfucker.
Watch out 'MTV'.
# I come from the islands and that's no excuse # Fuck off, Year 7 s.
You can't read at all at the age of 13.
Fuck you, motherfucker.
You do not own the amphitheatre.
Keiran! You 're not allowed here anymore.
You do that shit again, I'll send you back to Tonga.
What's up, man? She ran onto the road! The car hit her! I know how to plan a good formal.
I'm not a lesbian, guys.
Get off him!
A fire in the school, everyone.
There's a fire.
There's a fire in the school.
Get out quick! I find that I use my acting skills to create the drama of the situation.
Christ, I can't believe this is happening.
Oh, oh, Christ! It adds a lot of realism and it really freaks the kids out.
Miss Allen from the library has got third-degree burns One big problem that a lot of schools are having to deal with at the moment is terrorism.
It's a big issue.
So, I have a drill which caters for that too.
There's a terrorist attacking the school.
I'm serious.
Get down.
Get in a tight ball, everyone And I also do what I call a random drill, which is, I just spring some kind of emergency onto the kids and we see how they deal with it.
There's a kid in the school with a gun.
There's a kid with a gun.
There's kids down.
Go.
I'm serious.
Mrs Wong, get them out.
There's a paedophile in the school.
There's a paedophile.
He's in the school - get out.
He's on the school grounds.
Yes, I think a school with a good evacuation procedure is a school that survives.
That'll be at lunchtime on Friday.
And it'll be in full costume, so you boys can get used to the skirts.
What if you can't be fucked doing it on the day? Well, I've just come back from a weekend workshop on EPBSM, which is extreme behavioural problem student management.
I want to see Thomas, Joseph, Leon and Jonah up the front here, and the rest of you can go.
What the fuck for, sir? Come and talk to me, boys.
What they've found is that if you have a problem child and you give them extra responsibility, then they can rise to it.
I want to assign to you a group of Year 7 boys who are not coping well in the school.
I'll assign one to each of you and I want you to be what I call a'big brother' to them.
No way, sir.
That sucks.
No way.
We hate Year 7 s.
It's a shit idea.
OK, hear me out.
Now, Jonah, you 'd be the leader.
It's not our fault they've got no friends.
It's not your fault.
But as an added incentive, if you can do this program seriously, I'll let you do a breakdancing demo at assembly on Poly day.
Thanks, sir.
So, man.
You 've gotta do the program.
You 're a legend, sir.
OK, alright? Let's go, boys.
Look, I'll come and introduce you to them at recess.
Yeah, sure.
Thank you.
Alright.
Roll it, roll it, keep it sexy.
Remember, you 're having the best night of your lives.
Wiggle the bum more, please, Candice.
We are midway through rehearsals for 'A nnabel Dickson The Musical'.
And the machine, I call it, is finding its rhythm.
Remember, Annabel really going off.
You 've taken the ecstasy.
These are the sort of schoolyard bin, um, but we've sort of we've added this lighting effect.
These are lovely.
These are our school benches.
If you can imagine coming on These are the ecstasy pills, which are a lightweight polystyrene for for dancing purposes.
These are for the cutters - the kids that are into the cutting on the arms.
So, various sort of suicidal themes, which the teenagers are into.
A noose, and we sort of simulate a hanging sort of thing.
I'm finding that I'm weaving the character of Mr G into the musical a lot more than I expected I would.
# She's a naughty girl with a bad habit # Bad habit # Sell it to me, Mr G.
Matthew is my dream Mr G.
He's got the look.
He's a very I mean, he's a good-Iooking boy.
# She's a naughty girl with a bad habit # And these are our costume ladies.
Say hello, mums.
Hello.
Hello.
They're doing a variation on the school uniform.
Um, and just tizzing it up with some more stage-friendly fabrics.
These are our slut outfits.
The slut outfits that the girls will be wearing in the nightclub scene.
Your Rosie's gonna look lovely in that on stage, Mrs Travis, isn't she? Yeah.
I'll leave you to it.
We haven't got long, so don't Less chat, more sewing.
OK, guys, listening, please? Raise your hands in the air if you 're happy with the new girls' school uniform concept.
It's been an amazing week.
I've set up a Student Representative Council, an SRC, and all my friends are in it, and Ashley, 'cause she begged to be in it.
And we're doing what we can to make some really cool changes around the school.
Uh, mobile phones allowed in class for texting purposes only.
Oh, it's a bit distracting.
Overruled.
I'm president, Ashley.
The school grounds around here are so crap, seriously.
So, I'm thinking, like, Diet Coke machines along there, guys.
The mirrors in the girls' toilets are really crap and dirty.
They're disgusting.
They're so small.
We really wanna get big ones, like, really massive ones, like, full-length so you can see your footwear.
We need another cleaner.
Let's get, like, two more full-time cleaners.
We wanna get a girls-only Year 11 common room where there's, like, laptops and stuff for everyone That would be so cool.
Just chill out.
So, there's, like, wireless Internet and, like, you know, so we can just chat on MSN at lunchtimes to each other.
Yeah, like, an Indian kind of thing.
Yeah.
These should be higher.
They're so low, guys.
Look what I have to do.
Awesome idea.
Let me get that down.
What about a study room? Ashley, shut up, please.
One of the big things that we're doing, and I'm so excited about it, is we're doing a Year 11 formal.
Can't believe you guys have never had one here.
No, we did, but they banned it 'cause they think it's a distraction.
Is that why? Oh, I thought it was the povo factor.
You 've been to about five, haven't you? Yeah.
Well, six, actually.
It's really embarrassing.
Six formals? Yeah, six formals.
I started going in Year 7.
I wanna show these guys how to have a good time.
Just 'cause you go to a public school, doesn't mean you can't go off, you know? Fuck.
Fuck.
We never should've fuckin' agreed to this.
They look gay as.
They look like they don't even have pubes.
Come on down, boys.
These are your Year 7 little brothers.
And, guys these are your Year 8 mentors.
You guys have to find each other - every morning, every recess, every lunchtime.
And you younger guys, you know like we talked about, if you have any issues, any problems, you talk to your big brother.
Alright, now, Jonah, as team leader, I thought you might like to run a little 'getting to know you ' session.
So, I'll leave you with that responsibility.
OK, sir.
OK, good luck, guys.
Fuck you.
Fuck.
You got the fat one - sucked in.
My one's a You got a fuckin' ranga.
And a fat one.
I'm gonna talk to them.
Don't talk to them.
We have to.
I'm not talking to them.
Screw you.
We have to.
If you want the breakdancing demo, we have to fuckin' do it.
Fuck you.
I'm not talking.
I'm gonna do it.
So, have you got problems? Nice new friends, Jonah.
Shut the fuck up.
They're not my friends, motherfucker.
I have to do it as a program.
They're homos.
So, um, 'P aedophile' Pete said that you 've got social problems or some shit.
The fat one, tell me first.
You are down like this.
I needed a fairly big space to put on the show and the hall wasn't big enough.
So, I've booked out the gym till the end of term.
Come in quietly, grab your balls and leave.
So, I'm phys ed's least favourite person at the moment.
Shut the door, please, David.
I decided that I'm going to do the show as an arena spectacular.
The arena-style seating will cascade upwards in a circular motion around.
We're hiring that in.
Normally, you play to the front of a stage.
Within the arena, it's all around.
It's around everywhere.
I'm performing there, there, there, there.
I'm using Toby, the Down syndrome boy.
He's back.
He auditioned for the show, didn't get in.
He was devastated.
So, I've brought him back as my assistant.
You need to get a highlighter and highlight these points for me.
He's really a sounding board if I have ideas.
We chat about that.
And, you know, he's my little creative adviser.
What do you think about getting Mr G and Celine to do two circuits instead of one? Yeah.
What do you think - one or two? I think, one.
You know, he sits at his desk.
He's not really allowed to leave the desk.
But, you know, he's getting to see how it works.
Where's a pen? Get me a pen, please.
I'm sorry, Ja'mie.
Um, we can't have the formal.
It's been a blanket rule now for five years that there are no formals Why not? Well, it's a distraction from school work and we just can't be held accountable for Seriously, sir! your actions at a formal, so We really wanted a formal.
It's a formal.
Just let us have it.
Ja'mie, girls, it's just not gonna happen, OK? Oh my God.
I can't believe that just happened.
I'm not taking no for an answer, guys.
We've gotta think of more ideas.
I really want the formal.
I just don't think there's anything.
Like, he will say no.
He was so definite, wasn't he? And he's got no good reasons.
" No, you can't have a formal because I say.
" He's just a dick.
We've gotta think of something else, guys.
We WILL think of something else.
There's nothing.
Shut up, guys.
I just thought of an idea.
What? Oh, my God.
We could do, like, a hunger strike.
Like, just don't eat.
Not eat at all? Don't eat, and say, "We'll keep not eating until you let us have the formal.
" Seriously.
No, we can get the whole of Year 11 involved.
We can go down to the oval Yes, and having a banner.
like, first period tomorrow, saying, like, "Give us a formal, or else!" Oh, my God.
That's great.
We should text everyone about it.
Hey, ranga.
Ranga! Go and get me a Strawberry Break from the canteen.
You pay for it.
Tell your ranga to do it.
We've worked out that there's some good things about having the little brothers around.
Like, you can make them do shit for you.
Like, do your homework.
Write this for me, bro.
OK.
Do neat writing - I have to hand this shit in.
It's kinda good, kinda bad.
They just make us do all this stuff that's, like, really mean.
Hey, ranga.
They call us names that we don't like.
They call me 'fatty'.
They call me 'ranga'.
They call me 'gay'.
Go and get me my bag from my locker.
And don't drop it.
Get me that strawberry milk first.
We have to be careful when teachers go past.
Gimme the ball! So, we make it look like we're doing the program well.
Just teaching the boys about some footy.
Hey, sir, just talking about life and social problems.
What do you need to know? Alright, carry on.
Yeah, so, little brother I want to thank you all for your role in meeting the deadlines with that.
So, thank you for that.
Sorry I'm late.
Now Sorry, rehearsal - hectic as.
Greg, I need a copy of your script for your show, please, 'cause Annabel's parents are very keen to read it and Yep.
OK? Yes.
Good.
Moving on.
The ramps should be done in the demountables today for the new special ed room.
So we'll be shifting the multimedia gear into that space that they've occupied.
Sorry, what's going where? Uh, special ed's moving into one of the demountables.
Temporarily? Uh, no, permanently.
I've had the room fixed up and there's ramps there and so on.
No, no, that's where we're putting the performing arts centre.
That's the site for the performing arts centre.
We agreed that we're gonna leave them empty so the department agrees to knock them down.
We've talked about it a million times.
Greg, drama's important, I know that.
But we haven't got the money Well, why do you think I'm working my head off on the production? So we do have the money to build it.
Look, I appreciate that.
I know you 're doing your very best.
But, I mean, I just can't change the plans now.
Now, Greg, a couple of the parents of the special ed kids have asked me why their children are not actually going to be in the production.
Special ed? The special ed kids didn't get through the audition.
Well, I'd like to see that they get an involvement in the production.
I mean, we can't have a school with prejudice and exclusivity and so on.
So, I'd like you to make sure those kids are included.
Well, I don't see why I should be making exceptions for kids that didn't get through the audition.
Well, Greg, I'm telling you to do that, please.
I don't want to have to ask you again.
Fine.
OK? Now, the last item Starving for the formal.
We're meeting on the oval first period.
Starving for the formal - see you on the oval.
Mr Cameron is totally gonna freak out when he sees the whole of Year 11 starving on the oval.
It's gonna be so cool.
Did you do around the lockers? Go around Year 11 lockers.
I think it's important to stand up for yourself.
When you really want something, you 've gotta go for it.
Do you know what I mean? Ja'mie, did you tell everyone it was first period? Yes, of course I did, idiot.
Keep it straight.
The banner looks awesome.
We're totally getting our point across anyway.
Yeah.
Are any of you guys hungry? We've been here for, like, 10 minutes.
You told me you were anorexic.
Obviously, you were lying.
You don't have to be a bitch to me.
I was.
Deal with it.
We're starving for a cause.
I know how to starve myself.
I'm just saying Get off the oval and get to class now! Oh, Mr Cameron, shit! Oh, my God! Sorry.
Stupid behaviour, Ja'mie.
Sorry, sir.
You girls are stupid for following.
We just want our formal, Mr Cameron.
Get to class.
Sorry, sir.
I'm really sorry.
Do you want Ms Murray involved? Jonah, Jonah, give me a second, please, mate.
Did you or did you not agree to put in a decent effort on this program? Yeah, but he pissed off.
It's not my fault he left.
Jonah, he left because he came to tell me that not only were you neglecting him, but that you decided it was appropriate to pick on him and call him names.
Yeah, I just made a comment about him being fat.
He is, sir.
Look at him.
Jonah, I gave him to you because he's not coping socially.
He called me a lard-arse homo.
Yeah, as a joke, idiot.
Do you think that's appropriate to say to a person with confidence issues, do you? You said his mother must have fucked a whale to get that much blubber.
Leon, don't make this worse.
He lifted my T-shirt and said I had manboobs.
Bullshit I did.
You know, I'm this close to banning the breakdancing demo on Poly day.
No fuckin' way, sir.
Yes, I am.
Yes.
Sorry, Lucas.
I was only punking you anyway.
That's not an excuse any more, Jonah.
I'm sick of this behaviour.
One last chance I'll give you.
Why don't you trust me for once, sir? Tomorrow - junior swimming carnival.
You and your mates are gonna chaperone your Year 7 little brothers for the whole day.
We get to breakdance if we do that? Yes, you can.
It's a deal? It's a deal, sir.
Come on, Lucas.
Come on, Lucas.
Teach you some moves.
See you at the swimming tomorrow, boys.
See you, sir.
We missed you, Lucas.
What did you say to him? What the fuck did you say to him? She's got no idea.
She doesn't have a showbiz bone in her body.
It hardly seems fair at all.
No bloody idea.
I'm trying to maintain a standard, I'm trying to put on a good show and I don't need bloody special education nightmares.
I'm not I don't want them in my show.
Just don't let it upset you, mate.
We should never have bloody taken them.
I remember the meeting.
Do you remember that meeting? We sat in there and they said all raise hands to special ed.
And I was hands down, no bloody way.
They're nothing but trouble.
I mean, they're great kids.
I love the kids, don't get me wrong.
I think they're wonderful.
Toby and I get along wonderfully.
But there's a time and a place, you know.
Mmm.
The kids themselves understood.
They came to the audition, they weren't good enough, they were told that They've had a life of not being good enough.
Surely they know it by now.
Do you know what we're getting? I mean, are they wheelchair or walking? I have no idea.
I mean, wheelchair, we're screwed 'cause we'll have to build ramps.
Although, some of the non-wheelchair ones aren't exactly easy on the eye.
You heard what happened at I can never remember the name.
They had this special education facility - health department closed them down.
What happened? Apparently, one of the parents found human faeces on the classroom floor.
Straight to the health department.
All the handicapped kids are gone within 48 hours.
What sort of teaching environment has poo on the floor? It's That's all it would take here, isn't it? Just a little bit of poo on the floor and they'd shut us down.
I think we should still not eat, right.
That should still happen.
The protest on the oval didn't really work, so I've come up with a new plan.
We can't.
We have to be strong.
I'm gonna go and see Mr Cameron.
I'm gonna tell him that I've started cutting my arms.
And, like, that's why I'm wearing the jumper.
I'm just gonna go in and go, " Oh, my God.
What do you want me to do? "Like, I'm gonna kill myself if you don't let us have it.
" Seriously, and if he doesn't let us have it then, then he's a bastard and it's like murder.
He should go to jail or something, 'cause I could die from cutting myself.
Sir, I'm seriously upset and I can't believe I'm doing this to myself.
But you said we couldn't have it and it was just humiliating for me.
And OK, well I think I'm gonna keep doing this until you let us have the formal.
OK, well, I'll have a chat to Doug Peterson about the cutting situation, OK? I've gotta get in contact with child protection services.
And we'll contact your parents as well and let them know what's going on, OK? Alternatively, I'm gonna put an idea to you, Ja'mie, and all you girls, that at the assembly next Friday, I'll be happy for the SRC to do a presentation for us.
We will review it and have a look and see where we stand on formals.
Oh, my God! Thank you, sir.
I love presentations.
Girls, don't let me down.
Oh, my God! This is where we always hang out for the swimming carnival.
We call it 'Fobs Hill'.
Hey, sir.
Sir.
Hey! Look at this.
We're doing my tag on every motherfucker.
Here's my dictation tag.
Get it? See where it's coming from.
Hey, Jonah's one.
It says, "Before I root you, are you over 16?" Get it? Over 16.
I mean Like, rooting.
The boys are doing it too.
The little brothers have all got the tag.
Show them the tag.
Show them the tags.
Makes them feel like they fit in socially with the group.
And, look, "68IOU 1.
" Looking after the little brothers is good.
I like being a leader.
Your boobs look fine.
We're all waiting for you.
It's good to teach them things.
I drew a Zinc bra on him.
See.
Give me the Zinc.
I wanna draw my dick on you.
A school that bans formals is a school than bans life.
Summer Heights High, you should be ashamed of yourself.
Firstly, formals can give hope.
They give povo people something to live for.
Lack of formals in a school can also seriously affect the development of a girl.
Without formals, you can seriously stunt girls socially and physically.
No offence, but it's not exactly fun around here.
A Year 11 formal could do so much for this school.
Let me explain.
Formals bring people together.
They bring groups together and remove the apartheid of the playground.
Emos.
Christians.
Asians.
Skanks.
Lesbians.
And hot girls all come together at the formal.
It's a social and cultural melting pot that goes off.
Emos can dance with the jocks.
Christians sit with skanks.
Asians share limos with lesbians.
And my group talks to the fugly girls.
That's right - formals bring people together.
We got really bored, so we got one of the little brothers to go and steal this sheet from one of the teacher's clipboards.
It's got the phone numbers of all the teachers.
So we're gonna punk them.
We're gonna take a photo of my bum 'cause our phone's it's a camera phone Press faster.
And then we're gonna send it to all the teachers.
Put Miss Wheatley in.
OK, Joseph, are you ready? Take a photo.
Oh, man, look at this photo.
Give it to Elliot.
Everyone look innocent.
Just do innocent shit.
I can't believe we're doing this shit.
This is it, boys.
School without a formal - action.
I hate school so much.
It's so bad.
Stop pushing, you fat sluts.
You 're a fat bitch.
You 're the fat bitch.
I hate you so much, you stupid Christian.
Freeze! See what I mean.
It's really bad.
School with a formal - action.
Wow, I love school so much.
Who's done the assignment? I have.
I did three.
It's such a great place to be.
Oh, my God, school is so cool.
It's such a happy environment.
Freeze! See what I mean.
It's a much better place to be.
So please, Mr Cameron, reconsider and let us have a Year 11 formal.
Before we go, I wanna give you guys an example of what you will look like going off on the dance floor at the formal.
Thank you, Ashley.
Fuck, man.
He knows, man.
He's worked it out.
How does he fuckin' know? Maybe he's coming for Elliot.
Elliot's got a white arse, bro.
Get yourself changed and go and sit out the front.
What are you fuckin' talkin' about You are a bloody idiot.
I'm sick of it.
If your boyfriend's been sending you photos, it's not my fault.
It's not him, sir.
Check the number.
It's probably one of the Year 7 s.
I know what I saw and I know it belongs to you.
How do you know what my arse looks like, sir? Have you been thinking about it? Yeah? You can forget about the breakdancing offer.
It's off.
Well, I don't even care, anyway.
You 've stuffed it up.
That's bullshit.
We don't even wanna do that shit.
We just wanna make it fun for the little brothers.
This is not on.
It's NOT on.
Now, just get your stuff and get out of my sights.
They wanted to start it.
Delete the photo, sir.
You can't keep it for your private collection.
# School's hard sometimes # You just can't get by # You need something fast # To get you high # Marijuana or maybe ecstasy # Stop! No # Take this advice from me # Pick her up, drop the dog.
And # Don't get involved with drugs # Just fill your life with hugs # Don't get in Don't get involved with drugs # Good.
We have some visitors.
Stop you there.
Thanks, Rodney.
Just talk amongst yourselves, guys.
Hi.
Mr Gregson, I'd like you to meet your latest cast members.
Diane and Jonathan.
Hello.
Um, Jonathan, if I can get you to come on through and meet the rest of the cast.
Guys, we have some new cast members.
Toby, you might wanna talk to Yes, how are you going? Oh, not too bad.
How's the, um, new special ed centre going? Oh, fine.
No problems at all.
Yeah, they're pretty messy rooms down there, the demountables.
Well, they can be stuffy.
Dirty.
Well, we've had the cleaners in this morning.
They've steam-cleaned the carpet.
It looks brilliant.
Oh, did you? I've just come from there, actually.
And nothing to report, then? No, no, no.
It's, no, going very well.
Yeah, the room's terrific.
Yes.
And, uh, things going well here for you, then? Yeah, yeah, it's good.
It's all coming along.
Mmm.
Alright, Greg.
Well, look, I'll leave it to you.
And thanks very much for not making a fuss.
Yes right.
Thanks.
Much appreciated.
Hello.
I'll get you up on the stage.
Rodney, can I get you to jot down, uh, ramps and masks, please? Now, I've spoken to Ms Murray about this issue.
Uh, and we agree that if the SRC are that keen, and they promise to organise everything, then we will go ahead with the formal.
OK, we'll have to move on, so let's have the music off.
Thank you, girls, please.
Just turn the music off, thanks.
Got a few other things to get through.
I'm goin' there.
Come on, then.
Why don't you come and get me? What are we gonna do? Stand here all day? Maybe.
You got your pants wet, sir.
We are on in 10 days.
Greg's really feeling the strain at the moment.
Look like a bloody brain-dead retard.
I'm really a big pussy cat.
Don't push me, Margaret.
You called her daughter a walrus.
Through the hoop.
Stop looking at me.
Oh, whoops.
# Want to go to school # That was shit.
Year 11 formal tickets.
Hand up if you think we should invite the lesbians.
It's such a good look going with a disabled guy.
I went with a black guy to my Year 10 formal for the same reason.
The formal committee's decided that lesbians can come to the formal.
I know you 're into girls.
I think it's a really good idea.
Don't freak out.
I'm gonna bash the shit out of that motherfucker.
Watch out 'MTV'.
# I come from the islands and that's no excuse # Fuck off, Year 7 s.
You can't read at all at the age of 13.
Fuck you, motherfucker.
You do not own the amphitheatre.
Keiran! You 're not allowed here anymore.
You do that shit again, I'll send you back to Tonga.
What's up, man? She ran onto the road! The car hit her! I know how to plan a good formal.
I'm not a lesbian, guys.
Get off him!