SurrealEstate (2021) s03e04 Episode Script

1
[INDUSTRIAL NOISES]
LUKE (VO): Previously on SurrealEstate.
ZOOEY: Thank you for shaming
me into going to law school.
- LUKE: Who are you, really?
- WOMAN: Most people know me
by my nom de guerre. Death.
SUSAN: Tag Guinness is
our new research associate.
Tag, I need you. [YELPS]
TYLER: Luke roman is no ordinary doofus.
He has this link across the veil.
Just imagine if I
could hop into his skin.
WOMAN 2: If you fail,
if you inspire scornful laughter,
oblivion will not be punishment enough.
- [EXCITING SCORE FADES OUT]
- [MOURNFUL ORGAN SCORE]
Whoever claims to love god
yet hates a brother or sister
is a liar.
For whoever does not love
their brother and sister,
whom they have seen, cannot love god,
whom they have not seen.
I now invite Lisbet's children
to offer a handful of soil
as she is returned to earth.
- [EDGY SCORE]
- [SISTER SIGHS]
[SIGHS] it's not a contest, Barry.
Hm? Maybe I loved mom
twice as much as you two.
If you really want to quibble
I saw a front-end loader
- parked behind the shed.
- Stick it, Arlo.
- [WOMAN LAUGHS]
- Um, excuse me?
I should go first. I'm the oldest.
Rules are rules. Right, boss?
Uh, there are no rules I know of
but if we're having trouble
with the queue system,
might I suggest on the count of three?
- ALL THREE: One, two
- [DIRT CLATTERS ON COFFIN]
Three.
Goodbye, mom. Love you always.
See you on the other side, ma.
Take care of your beautiful self, Mom.
Love you.
Well, what do you know?
Barry hit the hole.
Get bent.
Mom can hear you guys, you know.
I'm pretty sure coffins are soundproof.
- Meant from heaven, dipshit.
- [SCORE ENDS]
And on that note, we bid
our beloved Lisbet goodbye,
until the day when we are all raised up.
- Amen.
- MOURNERS: Amen.
I think Barry should be
raised up first. He's oldest.
- [ARLO SNORTS, CHUCKLES]
- You can both go to hell.
[ARLO LAUGHS]
[THEME PIANO INTRO FADES UP]
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING BETWEEN MOURNERS]
God, why does death bring
out the worst in people?
[OPENING THEME]
[DISTANT MAN SCREAMING]
[SCREAMING, THEME FADE OUT]
ZOOEY: Hey. [CLEARS THROAT]
To my beneficiaries,
I, Lisbet Eno,
give, devise, and
bequeath all my possessions
to be shared equally
between my children.
Right, title and interest
of the family home, however,
shall not be named herein.
Rather, my children shall
convene upon the Eno home
to unanimously name a beneficiary.
All children must be
present for the duration
of deliberations, to be
made within 96 hours
or the house shall
be donated to charity.
Do what, now?
- Mom's stiffing us on the house.
- No.
She just wants us to decide together.
Like grown-ups
over the next three days.
Or else it goes [MIMICS EXPLOSION]
off to the goodwill like an old couch.
[SISTER AND A BROTHER SIGH]
- Is there a loophole here?
- [MISCHIEVOUS SCORE]
Like, is it legally binding
if mom was suffering a bout of dementia
during drafting?
Uh
your mom was sharp as a
tack up until the very last.
For what it's worth, I only knew Lisbet
a short while, but
she really was lovely.
And she loved you all very much
and it made her so
happy to think of you all
coming together and closing
this chapter on her life
and entering a new one,
side-by-side like responsible
adult siblings.
So, in that spirit,
can we please maybe hold our breath
for the next 96 hours
while we sort this out?
Please? [SHORT NERVOUS LAUGH]
[SCORE FADES OUT]
AUGUST: Uh, when you're
ready to jump back in,
I have a few tech
upgrades I'd like to share.
Just some digital applications
that elegantly augment
our rather analog devices.
Shall we, uh, set aside
some time to review?
Tomorrow all right? Nine A.M.? Hm?
[TWO SHARP KNOCKS AT DOOR]
Hey, uh, sorry to interrupt.
- There's no receptionist.
- [QUIET CREEPY SCORE]
Tyler! Hi.
Uh, everybody, this
is, uh, Tyler Macneil.
The owner of that hunk of burning love
on 712 Riverwalk that we just listed.
Tyler, this is my
partner, Susan Ireland,
and our associates August, Lomax.
Great to meet you all.
You guys good to finish without me?
AUGUST: Mm.
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING]
I'm excited to run you through the plan
I devised for your sale.
Naw. Let's talk about where I'm going,
not where I've been.
I just thought we'd get
Riverwalk on the market first.
[SIGHS] yeah, that's the past.
Show me my future, Luke. Dazzle me.
Okay. No problem. I got a long list
of possibilities. Let's narrow it down.
Give me specifics.
Oh. Hm. Let's see.
Maybe nine or ten thousand square feet,
five bedrooms, seven no, eight baths;
home office, oversized garage.
Nothing too big and
ostentatious, you know.
- It's not my style.
- [LUKE LAUGHS]
You laughing at me?
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
No.
Don't laugh at me, Luke. Ever.
I mean it, I will end
- [SHARP EXHALE]
- [SCORE ABATES]
Just don't.
I didn't mean anything by it.
Good.
[SOFT EXHALE]
I go running, uh, before work.
Gets my blood moving. You a runner?
Depends on what's chasing me. [LAUGHS]
Why don't you join me?
Seven A.M., my place.
Sure.
[DRAMATIC BOOM]
Just a warning, though.
I'm pretty fast.
- No problem. I cheat.
- [BOTH LAUGH]
[SCORE FADES OUT]
BARRY: Home, semisweet home.
Okay. So, anything you don't want,
we'll just set aside
for the estate sale.
And we will use these
[SIGHS] to mark the
stuff that you do want.
A little organizational hack
I picked up from a lovely
obsessive-compulsive
- I used to work with.
- [SISTER CHUCKLES]
- Dibs!
- [SISTER SIGHS]
[DRAMATIC ORCHESTRAL SCORE] Oh.
[ZOOEY SIGHS]
[BELL DINGS]
[SCORE CRESCENDOS, FADES OUT]
- SISTER: It's mine!
- I'm youngest! It was my wooby.
I have kids! If anyone
deserves a wooby, it's my kids.
- As the oldest
- ZOOEY: Ah, okay, okay!
How about we just put
a pin in this for now?
Okay? You guys have bigger fish to fry.
Look, I get it. Basic
civility is hard work,
so why don't we just call it a day
and we can pick it back up tomorrow?
- [MISCHIEVOUS SCORE]
- I am getting hungry.
- I could use some rest.
- And space.
I could use space from all of you.
Edwin Hubble could not describe
the amount of space I need from you two!
Great! So we agree!
Look at you! Go team!
[SCORE FADES OUT]
[LIGHT CLICKS]
- [LOUD CRASH]
- Oh! God
[OMINOUS SCORE] You again.
No. You again.
I'm your conscience, dipshit!
- What now?
- I'm just curious.
You're gonna let them keep
pushing you around like that?
It's mom's dying wish. We
We have to figure this out together.
Barry, Barry, Barry!
Don't fall for that shit!
The last thing they care
about is togetherness.
Remember the time they-they-they
ratted you out for smoking weed?
- I don't remember
- the end of twelfth grade!
You were grounded for a week.
You ended up missing prom,
one of the formative events
of a healthy adolescence.
You don't just bounce back from that.
So you ended up dating Tiffany.
Nice girl, but Jesus
on a jet ski, Barry,
the marriage is imploding.
Blowing up like Tunguska in 1908!
Now you're balding.
You're getting ear hair.
Who's responsible for that?
Who's responsible?
Trace it back to patient zero, bar.
Arlo.
Sheri.
So, you gonna let them
get away with that, bar?
Are you?
Over my dead body.
- [SCORE INTENSIFIES]
- [EVIL LAUGHTER]
[SCORE FADES OUT]
- [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
- [DOOR OPENING]
- Zooey!
- I know.
I didn't have to, but
my firm gets a discount
at this cute cafe every
Tuesday from 8:08 to 10:22.
Hm-hm. Why so specific?
I don't know. It was just
really fun to negotiate.
[MURMURS OF AGREEMENT]
Anyways, I just wanted to
spend my morning with you guys
instead of a bunch of suits.
LOMAX: Meh. Lawyers, am I right?
[SUSAN CHUCKLES]
Present company excluded.
- [ZOOEY CHUCKLES]
- So how is it? Is it great?
- [SOFT PENSIVE SCORE]
- Yeah, it is!
[CLEARS THROAT] It's
great. It's great. I just
Just who knew starting
over on the lowest rung,
up to my torts in paperwork,
could feel so, um
debilitating?
But, I guess sometimes I
just miss this. You guys.
Oh, we miss you.
Especially when the phone
rings for that sixth time.
[AUGUST LAUGHS]
[ZOOEY INHALES]
Wait. So where's Luke?
- [PHONE BUZZES]
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
Oh. Looks like he's still with Tyler.
Hm. It's not like Luke to forget.
- I doubt he forgot.
- [MELANCHOLY SCORE]
It just Wasn't important.
[SCORE FADES OUT]
Well, I gotta get back to work.
Uh, regroup when he's back?
Bye.
[TENDER SCORE]
Is everything okay?
Luke is being distracted
by a walking shiny object.
There's something
about this client. I
I don't trust him.
But you trust Luke, right?
Under normal laboratory conditions.
TYLER: It's awkward to say
and probably sounds even worse,
but the frail elderly?
They're good business.
And, these days, kids start googling
"assisted living" the first time
mom and dad misplace their keys.
[LUKE HUFFS] that's where I come in.
I make sure there's
dignity in the decrescendo.
What I build isn't nursing homes.
They're retirement villas:
White table linen
dinners, Cali King Beds,
meds served on the half shell.
[LUKE SIGHS, PANTS]
Thought you said you were a runner.
I didn't say I was a marathoner.
How long we been at
it now? Huh. Two hours.
Two hours?! [GROANS]
I'm late for work.
Just tell 'em you lost track of time.
Hydration?
- [LUKE EXHALES]
- [SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[SCORE ABATES]
Help yourself.
[WATER BURBLING]
Look, I got some
meetings to get to so, uh,
won't be able to look over
those listings you compiled.
You wanna reconnect after work?
- I guess.
- All right.
Just text me where. Gotta run.
- [DRAMATIC BOOM]
- Look at you.
The girls.
Oh, hello, alternative me
who's, really, really mean.
What is it this time?
It just occurred to me that there's a
a special kind of bond between
a mother and her daughter.
That's something that
your loser brothers
will never understand,
couple of rock throwers
with the emotional
intelligence of dryer lint.
But we know, don't we?
Yeah. We know.
It's like that time that your parents
missed thanksgiving.
You remember. 'cause of the storm.
- No.
- You cooked everything.
The turkey, the stuffing,
the potatoes, the yams.
Everything so it'd be ready in
time for when they got there.
You know who took all the credit?
Barry, the little tapeworm.
Barry is the worst.
Arlo broke your arm.
What? No. He did?
Yeah. He threw you down the stairs
to prevent you from telling
mom the truth about the turkey.
You see, they always hunted
in pairs, ganged up on you.
You never had a chance.
You were always so alone.
I was always so alone.
But this is where you draw the line.
With this house.
With this home.
My mother's home.
You know, I wonder what it's worth,
considering the current market value.
Probably a lot.
You need to know.
I need to know.
SHERI DOUBLE: Take it.
Take what's yours, by
any means necessary.
SHERI: What do you mean?
Rip it from their greedy little hands.
Leave them with bloody stumps
spewing tendons and blood
until their life force drains out.
[SHARP KNOCKING AT DOOR]
[DRAMATIC SCORE]
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
- [DOOR HINGES CREAK]
- ZOOEY: Hey.
- Hey, you.
How go the negotiations?
You know,
I think we need to find
out what the house is worth.
A decision this huge, we
do require all the facts.
Okay.
Actually, I know a guy.
[GENTLE SCORE]
I understand you're on a time crunch,
so I threw together a
quick market valuation
based on comps I had available.
- I think you're gonna like it.
- SHERI: Stop it.
- Well?
- I think this is a matter
for the executor, so
Oh. The executor.
ARLO: Worst avenger ever.
[SCOFFS] You're just
jealous that mom chose me
instead of you losers.
Loser? I'm a doctor.
[ARLO AND SHERI LAUGH]
You are a podiatrist.
- That's a doctor!
- That's a reach, is what it is.
It's a hell of a step up from
a master's degree in counseling.
SHERI: Hey, watch it, footboy!
It's a good thing you're a lawyer.
You're trained for this shit.
Yeah, I think I was sick that day.
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
- [FAINT LING JAZZ MUSIC]
LUKE: Those are the top contenders,
adjusted to your specs.
Best of the best.
I'm impressed.
Start making those appointments
and, hah, get looking.
[CREEPY SCORE]
- Another round here.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, ho-ho.
I don't know.
[LUKE SAYS A WORD INCOHERENTLY]
Something's gonna kill ya, right?
- [LUKE CHUCKLES]
- [TYLER LAUGHS]
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[SCORE ABATES]
So, was real estate always the dream?
(ECHOING, SLURRING) Yeah. Sure.
I mean, boyhood dreams aside,
this is what I always wanted to do.
Hm.
Boyhood dreams.
Go into business with me.
- [FAINT DRAMATIC BOOM]
- What do you mean?
These houses you're looking into,
they gave me an idea.
I'm diversifying my portfolio.
As an offshoot to the villas,
my vision is to
buy residential homes and rent them out
At the highest price
the market can bear.
Yeah. I heard some corporations
are doing that.
Look,
I got relationships with banks
that are just dying to finance me.
But I don't know the residential side,
which is your wheelhouse.
[LUKE EXHALES]
Think about it.
(ECHOING) Together we'd be unstoppable.
[EERIE SCORE]
- But first
- [GLASSES CLINK]
finish that beer.
[DRAMATIC BOOM]
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[RUMBLING]
[SCORE ABATES, FADES OUT]
[AUDIO RETURNS TO NORMA]
[LUKE SIGHS]
(SLURRED) What was that?
Huh, we just about lost you there, bud.
Think you've been overserved.
I've ordered Mr. Roman an Uber.
[EERIE SCORE INTENSIFIES, ABATES]
[TYLER SIGHS SOFTLY]
- [MISCHIEVOUS SCORE]
- [CUTLERY CLINKING]
Tomorrow,
no skipping lunch,
no matter how busy we are.
Low blood sugar is not our friend.
- (WHISPER) My god.
- [Sheri sighs]
Arlo, please pass the salt.
[SCORE INTENSIFIES, ABATES]
Now!
[SCORE INTENSIFIES, ABATES]
So you don't like my cooking?
If I meant that I would have said it.
I'll say it.
(WHISPER) Your food sucks.
- [SCORE INTENSIFIES, ABATES]
- [SHERI CHUCKLES QUIETLY]
You really are a renaissance man, Arlo.
Bad at so many things.
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
- [SCORE INTENSIFIES]
- [THUMP]
- [SHERI EXCLAIMS]
- [BLOOD SPURTING]
[SCORE ABATES]
[CUTLERY CLATTERS]
Wouldn't kill you to cook
your own damn dinners.
(WHISPER) Oh my God.
- [SCORE PAUSES]
- [SLURPING]
[LOUD MUSICAL ACCENT WITH FADE OUT]
SHERI: Their immaturity is the problem.
And their greed and their pettiness
and their weakness. They've
been like this forever.
This one thanksgiving, my
parents were going to be late
and I slaved away in
that kitchen all day.
It was supposed to be a surprise.
Instead it ended in a fistfight
and me breaking my arm.
[QUIET TENSE SCORE]
Okay, but you guys were kids then.
What about now? What do you want now?
I want them dead.
[SCORE INTENSIFIES, ABATES QUICKLY]
Oh! You know, sometimes.
[SOFT FAKE ROAR]
- [LAUGHS]
- [ZOOEY LAUGHS HALF-HEARTEDLY]
[SHERI SNIFFS DEEPLY]
Do you ? [SNIFFS]
Oh, yeah. What is that?
SHERI: Barry?
Arlo?
[EERIE TENSE SCORE]
[DEEP SNIFF]
[SNIFFS]
Oh.
[SNIFFS]
[DRAMATIC BOOM, RUMBLE]
Oh. Barry! Arlo!
- Who sprayed mom's perfume?
- (OVERLAP) Sheri, relax.
SHERI: Oh. This isn't funny!
If you are messing with
me you'll have to pay Barry
to remove my foot from your ass!
What are you talking about?
Spraying mom's perfume in here.
Make it feel like her
presence is in this house!
You are sick.
- You're sick.
- I should kick both your asses.
[MOCKING LAUGH] The
foot doctor got brave!
I'd run away in terror
if not for this pesky
plantar fasciitis.
Where are those sticky notes!?
[DRAMATIC STACCATO
ORCHESTRAL STRINGS SCORE]
[CLANG; CLANGING]
- Okay! Great! Great!
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
Everything's been tagged and sorted
and ready for tomorrow's estate sale.
Not quite.
(MEEKLY) what?
- [FADE UP DRAMATIC SCORE]
- [DRAMATIC BOOM]
Okay! Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Everybody back to neutral corners.
We can start fresh tomorrow, okay?
[THREE STACCATO STRING SCORE ACCENTS]
Go! Go! Go!
[SINGLE STACCATO SCORE ACCENT]
[CREEPY SCORE BUILDS SLOWLY]
[RUSTLING]
[SCORE SLOWLY INTENSIFIES]
Sorry. [SIGHS]
I was doing the client thing
last night. Lost track of time.
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
- Yes. Well.
- [AUGUST SIGHS]
- [LIGHT SCORE]
Despite a rather draconian non-compete,
I've managed to apply ASDRA knowledge
to our own modest technology.
For example,
now equipped with a retractable monocle,
allowing the sorting
of entities into genus:
Demon? Roadie? Poltergeist? Easy.
Plus, monocles are super dashing. Hm.
I'm sure the monopoly guy has
to fight them off with a shovel.
[CHUCKLES] our basic pkt device.
Our old standby now has
the utility to carbon date
energy fields so we can measure
how long an entity has been extant.
Oh, and, uh, the on button is now red.
Nothing says urgency like a red button.
- LOMAX: Mm-hm.
- And there's the gopher.
This remote device can now
detect and identify t-r-es.
Wait. I should know this.
AUGUST: Temporally resonant edifices.
Buildings that once stood,
but have been torn down.
I'm also in the process of installing
an agency breach alarm like
the one in our old office.
The one that could detect the roadies.
Exactly. I think it's important to know
if anything, or anyone,
has followed us home.
I worry that something
unwholesome might
imbed itself amongst us.
[SCORE FADES OUT]
Well, I for one feel safer. Susan?
Really great stuff, Augie. Thanks.
- [DOOR OPENS]
- [TENDER SCORE]
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING]
[SCORE FADES OUT]
MAN (WHISPERS): Psst. Arlo.
- ARLO: What now?
- Arlo.
Can I give you a little well-meaning,
constructive advice?
[ARLO SIGHS]
I guess.
Stop being a wussy bitch!
- Huh?
- Can't you see it coming?
Those two are gonna take
the house away from you.
Steal it out from under
your wussy bitch nose,
just like they did your bike.
Bike?
Jeez. Think, Arlo!
The hot 10-speed with the yellow bolt?
Eighth grade!
They traded it in for a
skateboard and a CD player.
You spent the summer alone.
Haven't had a best friend since.
But, Arlo, I have good news.
You do?
You're finally ready to fight!
I saw your little stabby fantasy.
It was awesome.
I laughed. I cried. I
stood up and cheered.
- You did?
- Yeah.
Time to make it a reality, Arlo.
Step up and kill them.
End their lives, then take what's yours.
[SHUSHING]
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[SCORE FADES OUT]
LOMAX: This is exactly what
our flipping house needs.
Check out these gorgeous old bricks.
They came from some
ruin outside of town.
I know this guy, Viktor,
he's kind of sketch,
- he runs a salvage operation.
- [GENTLE SCORE]
He sold them to me cheaper than new.
They are the answer to
that accent wall♪!
Ah. My mom would've loved these.
Rustic but with a history, you know?
I know.
Losing her really felt like losing home.
Think that's why it feels
so good to do this now.
You know, it connects me with her.
[EERIE DISTANT VOICES]
Check out this emblem here.
Did Viktor say what
this ruin used to be?
Mm-mm.
I'm gonna send this to tag.
- Maybe there's a story.
- [CAMERA CLICKS]
Nothing sells a house like a story
Mm.
Thanks for stopping by.
Things here are getting really weird.
Well, that phrase should
be on our business card.
- (LAUGHING) It should.
- Excuse me. Hi.
- ZOOEY: Hi.
- I live down the street.
I saw a lot of cars here.
I was just wondering if
everything was okay?
Yeah, we're just helping the Eno kids
settle up Lisbet's affairs.
Kids are all here?
Oh, yeah. It's like Ragnarok in there.
[WOMAN SIGHS] Mercy. They
still don't get along?
- [QUIET TENSE SCORE]
- So all that stuff is true?
Sheri's broken arm?
The time Lisbet missed thanksgiving?
Missed thanksgiving? Not a chance.
The Enos never spent a holiday apart.
Well, beyond that stuff
is there anything else you can remember?
Well
actually, there is one thing.
They used to talk to themselves.
A lot.
And it was disturbing.
Fighting words.
- ZOOEY: Hm.
- Yeah, I'll stop by later.
- I'd love to see them.
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
TAG: A caduceus is a medical symbol
and also the staff of mercury,
patron of thieves and outlaws.
The key crest makes this
exceptionally curious
but I have to dig
deeper before I can make
any solid identification.
Thanks. No rush. Just,
you know, curious.
So, sometimes the brick companies
would have a little stamp
like this to, uh, identify
bricks intended for a
big institutional job.
Great, thanks.
So what I'm saying, Susan, is
that it was probably like a,
like a big, institutional job.
[MISCHIEVOUS SCORE]
Okay. Super.
I'll get back to you, Susan.
Yeah, get back to me too, tag!
- [KEYBOARD CLACKING]
- [SIGNOFF SWOOP]
I think tag is crushing on you.
This is the new Susan Ireland.
The one who doesn't date
20-year olds, or colleagues,
or direct reports, or
bipeds, or anyone, remember?
I stand corrected.
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
- [INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[DRAMATIC ORCHESTRAL SCORE]
Why are you selling this?!
Uh, because it was in your sell pile.
No, it wasn't! Sheri!
Arlo! Who planted this?
The same jackass who planted this!
These cards are collector's items!
Okay, everybody just
needs to settle down.
And there they are.
The Eno kids.
BARRY: Rachel. You
You still live down the road?
I haven't seen you three in years.
[SUCKS TEETH] Sheri, look at you.
- Hi.
- [RACHEL LAUGHS WARMLY]
And Arlo.
[CHUCKLE] Rachel, why
do you have mom's quilt?
I was wondering how you
could possibly sell it.
It's special.
We're not. It's mine!
There is my junior choir robe.
This is my graduation gown!
Well, this piece is from my t-shirt!
Well, that's my flannel shirt! My jeans!
- [RACHEL SCOFFS]
- [TENSE SCORE]
What?
That's just not true.
'cuz your mother made this
from her own clothes and your father's.
She finished it when she
was expecting you, Barry.
And you're, you're sure?
Positive. I'm sorry.
You're all remembering it wrong.
[DISTANT WOMAN LAUGHING LIGHTLY]
[LAUGHING GETS CLOSER, MORE RAUCOUS]
(YELLING) Who did this?
[SOFT MOAN]
[TENSE SCORE CONTINUES]
Oh my god. My quilt!
(YELLING) Our quilt! Why would you ?
- [SHERI SPLUTTERS]
- No, wait, wait! Hold it.
Think about it.
The perfume. The quilt.
I heard a woman laughing just now.
So? What?
Is it
Mom?
Is she here?
Do you think that she's
mad at us?
ARLO: We're never gonna
sell a haunted house.
Who do we even call about that?
[SCORE INTENSIFIES, FADES OUT]
[DISTANT BIRDS CHIRPING]
Zooey sent us.
You're the spook wranglers.
We are real estate specialists.
SHERI: We could really use your help.
Sure. Just if it's mom, be nice, okay?
We're always nice.
- [DOOR OPENS]
- [DOOR HINGES CREAK]
Shall we?
Après vous.
[CREEPY VOICE DRONES]
[PING INTENSIFIES, ABATES]
There's something's
here and it's pissed off.
- The data shows something old.
- [TENSE SCORE]
Yet younger than Lisbet.
That's a handy device.
It's just start.
Cross-referencing, I can confirm
there's no maternal
link to the Eno children,
but there does seem
to be a familial link.
Doesn't make any sense.
[CREEPY SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[SCORE CRESCENDOS, FADES OUT]
Hm. No fancy takeout coffee this time?
I miss the company
motor oil I used to make.
You're too young for nostalgia.
It's not nostalgia, it's just
Okay, I didn't want to say this earlier
In front of everybody else, but
I'm actually having a
really hard time at work.
I guess I'm just feeling
really out of place.
You know, the fancy cappuccino makers,
the high-powered suits,
the business lunches.
- Sounds rough.
- [ZOOEY, THEN SUSAN LAUGH]
I just
I just mean it's not
here.
You know, it doesn't feel like home.
It takes time.
I felt the same way
when I first came here.
[QUIET TENDER SCORE]
Hey, you know lobsters?
Not personally.
[LAUGHS THROUGH NOSE]
So, lobsters, they molt.
And when they shed their
hard, well-worn exoskeleton,
the shell beneath is super soft.
They spend weeks in hiding
before it's safe to emerge.
Oh, I can relate. [SHARP
EXHALE THROUGH NOSE]
You're just getting accustomed
to the newness of it all.
A three-year fast-tracked law degree?
Starting at a firm
before finishing the bar?
That's a lot.
You are exceptional, Zooey.
But you're also human.
And apparently part crustacean.
[SUSAN LAUGHS]
Give yourself some time.
Live and breathe.
Before being trapped and boiled alive.
- Thank you for that.
- [BOTH LAUGH]
- [PHONE BUZZES]
- Oh.
Oh, god, it's the Enos. I gotta go.
- See you around.
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
- [ZOOEY SIGHS]
- Zooey! You got a second?
Uh
Oh, what are they gonna
do? Kill each other?
TAG: I've been looking through
the late Mrs. Eno's records
and there was a huge chunk missing.
Being me, I tried a couple of back doors
- into the data and found this.
- [GENTLE SCORE]
When she was 16, Lisbet Duval
that's her maiden name
gave birth to a baby girl
at St. Gertrude's hospital.
She never told me
about another daughter.
HERE'S WHY: The little
girl was named summer,
which is kind of ironic
because she had anything
but a sunny life.
Summer was snatched
away, as they tended to do
with babies born in such circumstances.
She lived in 13 foster homes.
Almost lost her in this period.
Then she turned up once more
in a shitty place the obituaries.
- No.
- TAG: Murdered at 15
By a foster brother who
stabbed her in the throat
and, well, yuck. Very sad.
Familial link. Half-sister.
Yeah, a bitter half-sister.
Well, it's hard to blame
her. A little lost girl
watching your privileged
brothers and sister
living their charmed lives.
It sucks. I'd be mad, too.
So, what? Summer was the one
putting all these false
memories into the kids' heads?
Wait Rachel did mention
that they used to always, uh,
talk to themselves.
It was summer.
Whispering bad things.
Making them all hate each other.
So she wants the kids
to do to each other
what happened to her.
Shit, I just left them alone.
[MENACING TENSE SCORE]
[SCRAPING; RINGING]
[LOUD CLANG]
You help Zooey. I'm gonna try something.
- What in the world?
- [SCORE ABATES]
When it comes to somebody
losing their mother,
there is only one solution.
I need you to trust
me on this one thing.
Always.
- [SCORE INTENSIFIES]
- [HIGH-PITCHED RINGING]
SHERI: You don't deserve
this place. Or a mother!
You brats had everything
and I had nothing!
You should all have died!
Had your throats cut out!
See how you like it!
WOMAN (YELLING): No!
ARLO: Mom?
- [DRAMATIC BOOM]
- [SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[RUMBLING]
[RUMBLING ENDS]
[SCORE ABATES]
(WHISPER) Oh.
Summer.
Baby.
It's mother.
[RUMBLING WHOOSH]
They took you away. [SHARP GASP]
Ah. I tried to find you. [GASPS]
So many times.
- [DRAMATIC BOOM]
- (yells) Liar!
- Mom!
- [MOM GASPS SHARPLY]
No. [QUIET SOBS]
Oh.
Oh.
[SHARP EXHALE]
I never forgot you, summer.
[SOFT INHALE, SHARP EXHALE]
[TENDER SCORE]
This piece of your baby blanket,
[GASPS]
it's part of the quilt that I
- You left me to die!
- No.
Then you went and had a new family!
A happy family!
I love my children.
All of my children.
It's not their fault.
Please!
- [DRAMATIC BOOM]
- [LISBET GRUNTS]
[SUMMER EXCLAIMS]
[ALL EXCLAIM]
[SUMMER EXCLAIMS WITH EVERY STRIKE]
[PANTS]
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[SOFT SHARP EXHALE]
It's time to go, honey.
Let's go together.
[SOFT EXHALE]
Oh!
- [LISBET SOBS]
- SUMMER (WHISPER): I love you.
[SHERI WHIMPERS] Mom.
[TENDER EMOTIONAL SCORE]
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING]
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
- [WHOOSH]
- [HIGH-PITCHED RINGING]
[SCORE FADES OUT]
- [BIRDS CHIRPING]
- SHERI: Okay.
So we've come up with a plan
and we have decided to sell.
Okay.
And split the profit four ways.
Four?
We'll never know summer,
but maybe we can do
something for her.
- For her memory.
- [TENDER SCORE]
Something not selfish and shitty.
Okay. Sounds noble so far.
So a quarter of the sale
should be directed to the
children's aid society.
In summer's memory.
And you all agree?
Yes.
Nice.
Well, I think your mom
would be super happy.
- And
- [CLICK]
look at that. With time to spare.
I knew you guys would do it.
You did?
God, no.
It's literally a miracle.
SUSAN: So leave your name and number
and I'll get back to you. Thanks.
- [BEEP]
- [GENTLE SCORE]
Hey, Susan! It's me.
Uh, just wanted to let
you know that I witnessed
some moltings today. The Enos.
Um, old pre-lobster me
would have thought it was,
you know, corny or emo,
but I guess I have a new appreciation.
And I'll still feel out
of place at the firm,
but my shell got a little tougher today
and that's because
of you. So, thank you.
Okay, bye.
[CLICK]
Oh, Judy, did you send
that box like I told you to?
[TENSE SCORE]
Good.
No, just a little inside
joke to an old friend.
Right.
[BEEP]
I'll send for the rest.
Oh, right! You're leaving.
You don't even care.
I'm trying.
[SHE SIGHS SOFTLY]
- No. Can't get there.
- [SHE SIGHS SOFTLY, SHARPLY]
You scare me, Tyler.
We used to laugh together all the time.
Now every time I laugh you get mad.
You get this look like you ha
Like you hate me.
[SCORE INTENSIFIES]
[SIGHS]
I don't even know you anymore.
What a shame. I'm quite extraordinary.
Especially deep down.
[SUITCASE HANDLE RATTLES, CLATTERS]
- [KEYBOARD CLICKS]
- [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
- [SCORE FADES OUT]
- Oh. You're still here.
- So are you.
- On my way out.
Promised my mom no more desk dinners,
which has been the
easiest to keep so far.
Anyway, this just came for you.
No return address.
- [RUSTLING]
- [RIPPING]
[CRINKLING]
[SOFT EERIE SCORE]
[FORCES AIR THROUGH TEETH]
What the heck is that?
[SCORE INTENSIFIES SLOWLY]
[DRAMATIC BOOM]
- Luke?
- [SCORE INTENSIFIES, ABATES]
[SOFT EXHALE] I have no idea.
[SCORE CRESCENDOS, FADES OUT]
[CLOSING THEME]