TaleSpin (1990) s01e48 Episode Script

Jumping the Guns

- [thunderclap]
- [man chuckling]
Spin it!
[men vocalizing]
Let's begin it.
- Ohh-ee-yeh
- TaleSpin
- Ohh-ee-yo
- TaleSpin
Friends for life
through thick and thin
With another tale to spin
- Ohh-ee-yeh
- TaleSpin
- Ohh-ee-yo
- TaleSpin
All the trouble we get in
with another tale to spin
Spin it!
Spin it, my friend.
- Ohh-ee-yeh
- Ohh-ee-yeh
- Ohh-ee-yo
- Ohh-ee-yo
- Ohh-ee-yeh, ohh-ee-yo
- Ohh-ee-yeh, ohh-ee-yo
[rapid vocalizing]
Spin it, let's begin it
Bear 'n grin it when you're in it
You can win it in a minute
When you spin it, spin it, spin it
So spin it!
TaleSpin! ♪
[ship's horn blows]
Pass the tanning butter.
I'm embarrassed.
And I'm chilly.
Can we put our coats on, captain?
[Spanish accent]
What? And ruin our perfect cover?
I am in disguise!
You are in disguise!
The Iron Vulture is in disguise.
Life is beautiful.
Within moments,
my love boat will sail
right under those Cape Suzette guns.
See how convincing you are, ladies?
You have caught the attention
of a handsome, young sailor.
Maybe he's trying
to tell us something, captain.
Nonsense. What could he
possibly be trying to tell us?
Now can we put our coats on, captain?
Ha ha!
Those Cape Suzette gunners can only
shoot what they can see.
They will not spot us
until it is too late.
For we are now the color of
invisible! Ha ha!
Today, Cape Suzette.
Tomorrow the world, eh?
[thunder crashes]
Not only am I a genius,
but I am very, very smart, too.
For this time, I have come
prepared for bad weather.
[evil laugh]
At last, I will sail into Cape Suzette,
right behind the noses of those silly
gunner-type persons.
Nice day for a rain cloud,
don't you think?
Looks like a cumulus piraticus to me.
When is that Don Karnage character
gonna learn he can't get past us?
Remember when he dressed up
that Iron Vulture of his
like a Broccoli Day
parade float?
Hee hee!
Big Bertha here sure steamed his stems.
Today Cape Suzette!
Tomorrow aah!
[alarm blaring]
Tomorrow's another day. Retreat!
I hate those gunner corps
with a passion fruit!
Better luck next time, Karnage.
Hold your fire.
That plane's packing our lunch!
Delivering sandwiches for Louie
can sure be a pain.
That runway's got more bounce
than my paycheck.
An amazing landing, as usual, Baloo.
Well, it was nothing.
I did it with my eyes shut.
And my teeth clenched.
Hey, gang! Feeding time!
Well, adiós. Enjoy your meal.
Have a nice weekend!
Hope I don't have to make
that landing again today.
Oh, Baloo?
I almost forgot to remind you.
Doggone it!
Remember to come back
for our 2:00 feeding.
Perhaps I will be back
for my 2:00 plundering!
And that will be my ticket in.
Oh, welcome back, Baloo, baby.
Hey, we got a pickle,
gonna put it in the middle
[both scat]
If my catering biz
is gonna keep buzzing, cousin,
I can't let you eat up all the profits.
Besides, I already packed you a snack.
Hey, what more
could a fellow want out of life?
I got my food, I got my health,
and I got my plane.
The Duck!
Where's my Sea Duck?!
I've been robbed!
There she goes, Louie!
I gotta catch her.
In what, cuz?
You were my only plane.
Hey, wait a minute.
Let me check the lost and found.
That's the best you can do?
[Louie] 'Fraid so, fuzzy.
Some old coot left it here
'cause it wouldn't hold any oil.
Louie, with your help,
this jalopy's gonna fly.
This plan is foolproof.
Which is the reason why
I am allowing you fools to handle it.
To your places, gentlemen.
To your places, idiots.
So, we fool the gun guys into thinking
we're the sandwich man.
Yeah. And then we take over
the big gun.
And when the Iron Vulture shows up,
we wave you right into the Cape.
For 57 varieties of plundering
and pillaging!
Be hasty with you.
My mouth is beginning to water!
And do not disappoint me.
[singing scat]
Keeping this baby oiled is a breeze.
Yech! Breeze?
It's a deluge.
There she is!
It's heading back to Cape Suzette.
Lousy bunch of joyriders!
Hang on, Louie.
We're going Duck hunting.
Here comes Baloo.
Right on time.
What's with the landing, Baloo?
Whoa, buddy,
you losing your touch?
[gasps] Oh, no!
The mayonnaise went bad.
The mayonnaise didn't go bad,
we did!
Oh, they'll love today's lunch special.
Stink bomb,
heavy on the mustard gas.
[clears throat]
This is Woodchuck calling Peter Piper.
Come in, Peter Piper.
This is Peter Piper.
Have you pickled their peppers?
We've chucked all the wood
that a woodchuck chucks.
They're in!
It is time to steal seashells
by the seashore.
There's my baby, Louie.
Let's go get her!
[grunts] All right!
Who's the creep
who stole my plane?
Darn rusted old seatbelts.
Us three creeps stole your plane.
Yeah. Happy landing!
[all grunt]
[panicked shouting]
[Louie stammering]
Louie, come on, stop.
You can stop now, we're OK.
Oh. Yeah.
Good thing we wore our seatbelts, huh?
[both screaming]
Good thing we wore our parachutes.
[Louie grumbling]
Uh-oh, updraft.
- Don't mind us.
- Just passing through.
So long.
[evil laughter]
[both yelling]
[Louie groans]
Next time I gotta remember
to bring a trampoline.
Next time I gotta remember
not to have a next time.
Aw, shucks, you boys
are doing this all wrong.
When you take a tumble like that,
you're supposed to tuck your ankles
and support through the knees,
like this.
[coughs] Of course I never fell
like that before, myself, exactly.
But I seen it done a million times.
- Look, pal
- O'Turret's my name. Barney O'Turret.
But my friends call me
well, they only call me that
when they're mad.
Look, Barney, pirates stole my plane,
and they've taken over the cliff guns.
What?! I worked those guns
before I retired.
No piratical types
are gonna get past my cliffs!
Then you'd better do something quick,
Barney, old buddy.
'Cause there's a rusty old Vulture
headin' our way.
It's the Iron Vulture, all right.
We need a radio or something
so we can notify the Coast Guard.
Well, old Barney will fix you right up.
Well, boys, let's go make that call.
Right up on that far ledge.
You mean
we gotta climb up there?
You OK, Barney?
I'll get this climbing thing under
control. Seen it done a million times.
You mean you've never
climbed this cliff before?
Never had to call anyone before.
[Baloo grunting]
How much more do we have to go?
Just up that next ledge.
Oops, missed.
Here, let me try, pops.
Hey, nice roping, fuzzy.
No problem.
Problem. Problem!
By the way, watch out
for them mountain goats.
They're real ornery.
Well, there it is.
[Louie and Baloo]
A phone booth?
You said you wanted
a radio or something.
This is "or something."
I'll handle this.
Kind of a tight fit.
Hello, operator!
Pirates have taken over the cliff guns.
Notify the Coast Guard.
Hello? Hello?!
Deposit five cents, please.
Anyone got change for a dollar?
Here, I got a nickel.
I'm lacking maneuverability.
Can you help me out, Barn?
Sure, no problem.
I've seen this done a million times.
I'll get it.
Man, I can't see it.
Move them size 14s, Baloo.
Where to?
[all grunting]
We got company coming, cuz.
You know, that goat's
beginning to get my goat.
Where's the nickel?
Where's the phone booth?
Where's Barney?
[Barney] I'm right here!
I got the nickel!
But the phone's dead!
You think the Coast Guard'll put
the stoparoo on those pirates?
You and me are
the only two in the world
who know those guns
are gonna be silent today.
I guess it's up to us to fix that.
You boys keep going.
I'll catch up.
Don't worry, Barney, old boy.
We'll come back for you.
I hope.
OK, let's crack this mountain.
Ooh! Ooh!
Watch this! Bomb bowling.
[all laugh]
- I love this game.
- No, no, it's my turn.
Hey! [chuckles]
This mountain climbing
ain't so bad.
Yeah, except for the mountain part.
And the climbing.
And the falling rocks.
[distant laughter]
Sounds like we're real close.
Climb this way.
You know, we gotta talk to the boss
about a raise.
We deserve one.
Yeah. We do all the looting,
and he gets all the loot.
- It ain't fair.
- They're right above us.
Why, I don't even own
a lousy pair of boots.
[muffled grunting]
Why, I'm tired of being stepped on!
[both] Huh?
Nice of you to drop by.
Now drop dead.
[both laugh]
[both] Not again.
[both] Yaaaah!
[both screaming]
Can I give you boys a lift?
[Louie] We're sure glad to see you,
Barney, old buddy.
Looky, somebody threw away
a perfectly good aeroplane.
Barney, you can fly?
But I seen it done a million times.
H-h-ow do you steer these things?
Push the lever forward gently.
[Louie and Baloo screaming]
[outlaws scream]
That was some stunt, Barney.
I knew I should have
stayed in bed this morning.
What happened to the ammo?
Looks like there are only
three shells left.
The ought to be enough
for three big holes.
Hey! My baby!
Here, Baloo.
I'm going with my duck.
Barney, grab those shells.
You know what to do.
Yes, siree, worked on that gun
for 50 years.
Polishing that barrel every day.
- You never fired it?
- No, but I seen it done
[both] Yeah, yeah. A million times.
Don't worry, boys!
I'll handle it!
You think old Barney
can handle those guns?
Well, he never climbed a mountain
or flew a plane before.
- We're in big trouble.
- We're in big trouble.
Labor Day! Labor Day!
No, no Arbor Day!
No, wait mayday!
That's it! Mayday!
What do you want, you idiot?!
Open up, it's an emergency!
Hold on, someone's at the door.
Who is it?
Repossession company.
We're here to collect.
We're too late.
What could you possibly come
all the way back here to ask me?
Can you open the hatch
so we can vamoose?
Sacrebleu cheese!
Get them!
I guess that's a no.
Keep the engine running, cuz.
I'll open the hatch.
Barney, old boy,
don't let us down now.
All right.
Now let's see here.
This one raises the barrel.
Yep, that's it.
This one here must turn it back and
And this one
I bet this one fires it!
Why are those three imbeciles
making the gun go boom-boom?
That's one.
Come on, Barney,
get something right, just this once.
How about this one? No
But this one here could
Nope, nope. That ain't it.
Time to make Baloo
black and blue.
Some other time, champ.
Do I have to do
everything myself around here?
[guns cocking]
I knew I should have read
my horoscope this morning.
What are you doing here?
- Where are the others?
- They fell down.
What?! Then who made the gun
go boom-boom?
[Barney] Let's see now.
A little higher up.
A little to the left. There.
That ought to do it.
Now I'll load the gun.
Well doggone it, how can I hit
something if it don't stand still?
Listen up, Karny, that first shot
was a warning shot.
Release Louie and turn back
or the next one will blow the beak
right off of this bird.
[shell whistling]
Ha! He is the worst shot
I have ever heard in my life.
It was worth a try.
In mere moments,
Cape Suzette shall be
a bargain hunter's paradise.
Free money. Free jewels.
Free seafood dinners.
My last shell.
Oh, darn, it got stuck!
Oh, shucks.
Shot three.
Yeah. Barney blew it.
Now I can truly say with confidence
today, Cape Suzette, tomorrow
Well, blow my nose.
I did it.
[both] He did it?
Turn around the ship
and run away with us!
[Louie] Ahem!
I propose a toast.
To us, three of the bravest
mountain climbers I know.
- Hear hear!
- I'll drink to that!
Say, Barney, I've been meaning
to ask you,
you worked on those guns for 50 years
but you never climbed a mountain.
How'd you get to work
in the morning?
Why, I took the elevator.
[both groan]
[men vocalizing]
Another tale to spin
Another tale to spin
[men vocalizing]
[man chuckling]
TaleSpin ♪
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