That '80s Show (2002) s01e10 Episode Script

Punk Club

1 [SIGHS.]
Mm-- Hey, remember to pick up orange juice.
Katie? Hello? Juice? Right.
Got it.
Hey, Roger! Hurry up! Stop yelling.
I'm trying to study.
Morning, kids.
Where's the coffee? We're out.
What the hell? Sorry.
I'll go to the store after class.
Oh, and orange-- juice.
I heard you.
Where's breakfast? There's no breakfast.
But this is blueberry pancake wednesday.
Yeah, I know.
With the Link sausage.
Do we have syrup? I don't know! Sorry.
I'll make pancakes for dinner tonight.
What are you talking about? Tonight is Lamb chops.
Look, I have a full course load this quarter, and I can't keep up with the house.
It's all right, honey.
Your school work is the most important thing.
You did Iron my shirts, right? Can't one of you go to the dry cleaners or fix breakfast? Hey, Hey, hey! I do my own laundry.
Sure, that's easy.
You dress like you're washing the car.
Morning.
Where's the coffee? There's no coffee.
Let's go.
Right now? Hello, I haven't done my hair.
You'll have to do it in the car.
Without coffee? There's no coffee! Sorry, Roger.
Katie's kind of falling down on the job.
And who gets hurt? You, if you don't come now.
I'm leaving.
Daddy, I'll get to your shirts, and I promise I'll make pancakes tomorrow.
Pancakes on waffle thursday? Have you gone insane? Karma Karma KARMA KARMA Karma chameleon you come and go you come and go may I? You always do.
[SIGHS.]
What are you doing? Crimping my hair.
It's portable.
Ah! You can take it camping.
Trying to put a little more hump in the hump day.
You know, some people do that in the bathroom.
I would have, if you hadn't rushed me out the door.
You see, my friend, looks are everything in this business.
Ah.
The business of being Roger.
Yeah.
It's an all-day, every day kind of job.
By the way, you still owe me for that tie.
Hey, I couldn't carry a wallet.
My jordaches hug major ass.
Hey, watch it! Damn! Crazy driver! You see that? She almost hit me! She was putting on makeup.
[SIGHS.]
Bozo.
What is that smell? Aah! Corey, I can't go to work like this.
Roger, you look fine.
No one's even gonna notice.
Wow! Nice 'do, Michael Jackson! Makes me want a pepsi.
Ow! That's it! I'm calling in sick.
I need a really good excuse.
Nobody ever questions mono.
Oh! Mono, the kissing disease! Sexy! You know, I'd pick a disease that people would actually believe that you could get, like, uh mumps or gingivitis.
I'll keep the mono.
Bro, I have to get this hair home.
Can I borrow your car? Hey! [IMITATES E.
T.
.]
E.
T.
, phone home.
Don't ask.
I wasn't gonna.
Hey.
Hey.
"Chaos.
" It's a new punk club.
It opens tonight.
New punk club.
Opens tonight.
First 50 in, free triage.
Cool.
New punk club.
Opens tonight.
Been there, done that, don't care.
Cool.
See ya.
Did you see that? She deliberately, on purpose, did not give me a flier.
Maybe she didn't see you standing right in front of her with your hand out.
What? Like I'm not cool enough for a punk club? Huh? A stupid punk club, is that it? Stupidpunk! Hey, easy on the language, Johnny rotten.
Don't take it so personally, Corey.
So she didn't hand you a flier.
Maybe I wanted to go.
Look.
Civil unrest is playing.
So what? You love them.
Come on, I'll pick you up.
We'll go together.
No.
You have to be in the mood for that kind of club.
Oh, right, Yeah.
That "Angry at the world, I hate everybody, I'm picky who I give fliers to" Kind of mood, right? Yeah.
That's the one.
Man, I wonder what she's gonna wear to that club tonight? Maybe that new mini-skirt she made out of safety pins.
What are you talking about? She said she's not going.
Yeah, you're right.
Everyone knows you don't wear safety Pins After labor day.
Rt, what are you doing? Hey, you work for me, right? Iron my shirt.
Ha ha ha! That's funny! I thought you said, "Iron My shirt.
" Ha ha! I did say-- look, we have a meeting with the manufacturers from taiwan in an hour.
Why aren't you dressed? Because I have no idea what I'm eating tonight.
Rt, this is business.
Put your personal problems on the shelf and throw something on.
We have to go.
All right, but when Katie gets here, I want you to have a little talk with her.
I cannot live like this! Sure.
Oh, remember, at the meeting, we're gonna do that thing we did last TIME: Good cop, distracting, sexy cop.
Right.
Oh, hi, honey.
Hi, daddy.
Well, I guess I'll just go up and get ready.
Hi, Sophia.
Katie, your father's very worried about you.
He is? Good.
I'm exhausted, 'cause after class and studying, I have to cook and shop and do laundry.
Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Don't you have a girl who does that? Sophia, I'm the girl.
Have you talked to him about this? A little.
I even yelled this morning.
I guess I'm not very good at getting my point across.
Well, it's obvious that once your mom left, rt expected you to take over the mother role and all the responsibilities.
Classic transference.
Oh, my god.
You're right! I learned something when I was in therapy.
Sophia, you saw a psychiatrist? Twice! I'm better now.
I'm glad.
Really.
Thanks.
Anyway you have to let rt fend for himself.
That's the only way he's gonna learn.
What if I pout and cry? That's how I got my canopy bed.
No.
Trust me, Katie.
If you give them everything they want, they want more.
If you deny them, they ask what you want.
Sophia, that is so smart! You're right! I'm not the maid, and from now on, someone else can clean up.
I'm through with-- Oh, my god! Look at what I'm doing! Did you see that? I saw that.
That was scary.
Stepford scary.
Sophia, every fiber in my being wants to iron this shirt.
Don't you dare! I don't think I know how to manipulate people.
It's fun! I'll teach you!   [LONELY PLANET BOY BY THE NEW YORK DOLLS PLAYING.]
Hi.
Uh weird.
I thought you weren't coming.
Uh Yeah.
You already said that.
[LAUGHS UNEASILY.]
You know, I'm so glad I didn't make a bet with Margaret.
She said you were coming, and I thought to myself, Why would tuesday lie to me? I didn't! So why didn't you call me to come with you? Sometimes these clubs aren't very good, and I didn't want to drag you out to a badclub.
Well, that's so considerate.
Thank you.
Hey, I didn't mean to hurt your-- that's right! Keep walkin'! and don't come back without a warrant! Stupid narc! Right--you just-- right? Hey, you gotta get your hand stamped if you want to get back in.
No, thanks.
Scared, huh? Hey, you're the girl that didn't give me that flier.
You think if I stare at you long enough, your head will explode? Are you asking if I think you possess those powers? Wait.
We need to talk.
All right.
I think we're alone now.
Look, I came here tonight 'cause I didn't think that you'd care that much.
You don't want to be seen with me.
What are you talking about? You came alone.
I embarrass you.
Ok.
Now you're just paranoid.
Paranoid? No, I don't think so.
I mean, you come to my house, you hang out with my friends, you drink at my club, and not once Have you ever invited me to be a part of your scene.
Well, it's just a timing thing.
Plus, you use the word "Scene.
" It's-- why can't you just be straight with me? Don't you trust me? Hey, wait! You followed me here! I mean, what's that about? No, no, no.
Not working.
No.
You're not gonna turn this around, all right? If you're too uncomfortable to be out with me in Public, then you shouldn't be out with me at all.
Hey, you better get in there, sir.
Renee stapled her tongue to the bar, and now Everybody's doing it.
You're the doctor, right? Heh! [SIGHS.]
You don't need a doctor, you need pliers.
Come on, I'll show you.
What are you doing home? I didn't go to work.
I can't be seen.
I'm a horrible mutant.
Roger, you gotta get over this.
It's not the end of the world.
Why do bad things happen to people with good hair? What you need is a couple of stiff drinks.
I'm already there.
Well, then, you need some dinner.
Come on.
Something smells good in the kitchen.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
Ah, yes! Monte cristo sandwiches.
Ha ha! Yes, indeed! My favorite! They are good.
Where are they? Sophia and I each made one for ourselves.
You didn't make one for anybody else? Nope.
It's my hair, isn't it? Oh, Hey, kids, don't feed the mutant! He'll never go away! Sophia, did you have that little talk with Katie? I did.
And did you talk some sense into her? I did.
Food's too good for freak boy! Well, you didn't do a very good job.
You do remember you work for me? Daddy, I don't work for you, and I'm tired of doing everything around here.
When she told me she mops floors, I almost passed out.
My grades are important.
I have to study, so we're gonna share the work.
The end.
Well, if that's how it is, then I guess I'll just have to learn to live with it.
Gosh, I'm hungry.
You know, I'm not gonna eat this-- yes, you are! You are gonna eat every bite! Ok, fine.
You know, those shoulder pads you ladies wear, they give you a false sense of power.
Come on, Roger.
You and I will make something.
Like what? Something! So, get this.
Then the townsfolk try to Stop Kevin Bacon from DANCIN' fat chance.
Excuse me-- I'm talkin' here! Margaret, just because I didn't bring Corey to the punk club, he thinks I'm embarrassed to be with him.
What does this have to do with  Footloose? Well, he's all upset and whatever.
Well, he should be.
Look, you went to the club, and you didn't want him to know about it, so why don't you just admit it? I don't care what people think.
I'm not embarrassed of anything.
Nothing embarrasses me.
I couldn't care less what people think.
I was so embarrassed when he showed up at the club.
Wow! You're shallow! I'm not shallow.
You're right.
I'm sorry.
You're more of a hypocrite.
Oh, god.
You're right.
How did this happen to me? Well, I guess you're like the preacher who didn't want to dance.
But then, when he heard the music, he couldn't help himself.
I'm telling you, this  footloose is a kick-ass movie! What are you doing? I'm making sure that every dish in this kitchen is dirty.
Why? Because I know Katie, that's why.
She won't be able to stand it.
First she'll wash just one, you know, for herself.
Then she'll do a few more, and then, before you know it, the whole kitchen is clean.
It is a slippery slope, my friend.
There's ketchup on the floor.
Good! This is war! Daddy.
Roger.
Katie.
Shopping for just one again, I see.
Until we agree on sharing chores, that's how it goes.
Fine.
Oh, by the way, we're completely out of clean dishes, so I guess you'll have to do a few, you know, just for yourself.
I don't think so.
Yes! They're paper plates, and they're all mine! Well, so much for your little evil plan.
At least I still have all my own hair.
Katie, is there something wrong With my look? No.
You're very handsome.
Yeah.
Uh, no, I know.
I but what's so wrong with my look that tuesday's embarrassed? Remember the   SESAME street song? You know, where the one thing is different from the other things? They showed 3 circles and a square thing.
Hey, I am not the square thing.
Ok.
3 bananas and a doughnut.
I'm saying, you didn't hate the doughnut.
You just had to get used to it.
Ok, I'm lost.
You're different in her world.
See, when Owen and I go out, everyone stares because he's in a uniform, but when I go to the naval base, I'm not in a uniform, so everyone stares at me.
Don't you think they stare because you're the only woman among 5,000 men? Oh.
Hee Hee Hee! I'm gonna wear something REALLY hot next time.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
Hi, tuesday! Hey, doughnut, there's a banana here to see you.
What are you doin' here? I can't exactly say I'm sorry, 'cause I've never actually said that and why start now? I think I'm tearing up.
I want you to come to chaos with me tonight.
Oh.
Did you bring a costume for me to wear? I already didn't say I'm sorry.
I'm trying.
You're wrong about what you think.
I'm proud to be with you, and I'm gonna prove it to you.
I wish you would.
You are so high-maintenance.
[GIGGLING.]
Ok.
Let's look at the chart.
Now, our research has shown us that most of our customers do not use our equipment.
In fact, most of them stop in 3 days, so I say we have a 24-hour return policy.
Now, who's with me? Let's take a break.
What? I ironed the cleanest one I could find.
You and Katie have to settle this.
Why? Wellyou smell! [PUNK MUSIC PLAYING.]
What are you staring at?! so he wears a shirt with a collar! Big deal! He didn't say anything! He didn't have to! Why are you acting like this? I don't need you to defend me! Well, somebody's got to, because these people are wrong! They can't judge you! I'm not gonna Let them look down on you because you're not as cool as them! I'm not superficial like they are! He's flawed-- completely flawed-- and I dig him! All right, that's it.
We're leaving.
Come on.
That's right! I'm with him! What? You want a piece of me? Huh? You want a piece-- no, no, no! Did I show them or what? Yeah, you sure did.
That you're crazy about your big dork.
Yes, I am.
Why do you care what people think? I don't.
I mean, if I did, why would I be with you? Is that a slam? No.
I just don't care what people think.
Ok.
You win the "I don't care what people think" Contest.
Are you happy? Ha Ha ha! All I'm saying is, the next time we go to one of your hangouts, could you not scream how proud you are to be with me? Ok, you big, hot dork.
Good.
You want to go back to the club? With you? Are you out of your mind? What is that smell? It's Roger's hair.
Oh.
Ok.
Item 120: Coffee.
I don't make coffee.
Ok with me.
I drink tea.
All right.
Katie makes the coffee, rt buys the coffee.
Fine, but she has to let me know when we're running low.
And that includes filters! Ok.
We've made the coffee.
Now, cleaning the coffee maker.
I'm not cleaning the coffee maker.
I'll clean it.
And if she finds it not cleaned in the morning, she doesn't have to make it.
Deal.
Ok.
Fabric softener.
I'm not waiting for the rinse cycle.
Ok.
Corey does the laundry.
Yeah.
That's good.
Now I gotta cut Loose Footloose kick off your Sunday shoes Please, Louise pull me off of my knees Jack, get back come on, before we crack lose your blues everybody Cut footloose
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