The Amazing World of Gumball (2011) s06e07 Episode Script

The Cringe

Uh, can I just Oh, yeah.
Sorry.
Uh, right.
I was just trying to get past, but Yeah.
Right.
Well, uh, h-have a good one.
Sure.
And you.
Yeah.
Okay, relax, man.
It's weird, but you can do this.
Just focus on your breathing.
Deep breaths.
It'll make the weirdness go away.
Aw, man! I can hear his breathing! Just stay on it, Gumball.
Relax harder! What is he doing in there?! Never mind.
Just inhale and exhale.
Nope.
Yep, not gonna happen.
Mm.
Oh.
Too early.
No, wait! And then all the water flows over the edge.
More water than you can ever imagine.
So much water, gushing.
A torrent of water.
Then it floods into another river.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yes! Uh, uh, uh! Hold on.
Hey! Um, I-I was just checking that you weren't, um Never mind.
You go! You go.
I'll just hang out and watch.
No, no! I meant "wait"! I'll hang out and wait! Hold on.
What am I doing? This is my chance! What the How?! You like my new shoes? I thought I'd mix it up a little.
It can't go on like this.
I know.
It's been so long since I had a bathroom break, I can't laugh without gargling.
Okay, first of all, ew.
And secondly, I'm talking about the insane levels of cringe between us.
It has to stop.
But how? We have to air out the awkwardness, let it all hang out, free and loose, flopping in the wind like a panting dog's tongue.
That sounds awkward enough already.
And then we'll roll in our awkwardness! Slather ourselves in it like a couple of oiled-up prize hogs until the bitter shame finally tastes sweet! I feel like I need a shower.
Funny you should say that.
Gym shower! How's that for awkward? Whaat? Just realized you are very much wearing shorts.
So? What's the problem? If anything, it makes it more awkward.
Uh, yeah, for me! That's like showing up for a costume party when everyone else is dressed for a black-tie event.
More like turned up to a black-tie event only wearing a black tie.
This won't work if we can't reach full cringe.
It's like a hot-air balloon trying to take off.
It's never gonna happen if one of the guys is still wearing his pants.
Wait.
What? Come on, man! Take 'em off! No way.
Just take 'em off! Leave it! Just take off your clothes! You know what? I can't see how this situation could get any more cringe-worthy.
Oh, I can.
Moon landing.
What's that? Yep, good answer.
But pass.
Leave me alone! Come on, man! That was nothing! We have to cringe so hard that firemen will have to use a hydraulic jack to unclench our heinies! Dude, please let me go! You're insane! Wait.
That's it! "Insane," "handsome," "talented"! No, I didn't say "handsome" and "tal--" Talent show! Let's audition for a talent show.
Welcome to "Elmore's Got Talent.
" Watch as the angler fish of fame lures small fry into its jaws using the blinding power of starlight.
Laugh at their crushed dreams.
Applaud as we create the idols of today so you can burn them tomorrow.
And now for the worst audition of the week.
Oink-oink-oink.
Akk-oy! Ug-ug-ug-ug-ah.
Oink-oink! Gak-gak-gak-gak.
Oink-oink! West Coast.
Bak-oy! Bak-bak-bak-bak! Oy-oy! Oink-oink! Aaaahhhhhh! You boys are very lucky to be alive.
You have experienced a cringe level of 100,000 DJ.
That's the equivalent of hearing I highly recommend stopping whatever it is you're doing before you end up with the clenching muscles of a 40-year-old clam.
Thank you, Doctor, but we've done enough.
I think we cured it, man! I guess we're gonna have to take things to the next level.
Good evening, honey.
When I said take things to the next level, I didn't mean with my mom! Look, kiddo.
I know it's hard for you.
It's a big adjustment.
Please.
Please don't.
I'm not here to replace your father, but know that if you want to you can call me Dad.
You're a teenager, and you need a male role model in your life.
You are You are becoming a man, and I know you have questions.
So let me give you "the talk.
" Now, when a man truly loves a wom-- Whoa! That's a good one! I can already feel it echoing through time! Time! Time! Hey, Gumball, this is your brain.
Enjoying the most beautiful day of your life? Well, do you remember when Say hello to Daddy.
Hey, Gumball.
Feeling happy? Well, do you remember when Hey, Gumball.
Enjoying your eternal rest? Well, do you remember when Wait a minute.
What's this? Yeah, yeah, I know.
Not my best look.
No need to rub it in.
Yeah, I'm not talking about the fact you look like the mushroom cloud from a girl-repellent atom bomb.
Look here, in the corner.
Ha! You look like the reason top hats were invented.
No, dude.
I meant we must have known each other when we were little kids.
We've got history.
Do you understand? Right.
I guess we have shared emotions that run deeper than we thought.
I am afraid there is no avoiding the inevitable.
I meant we have to go back in time to find out why we feel so awkward around each other.
Oh, you're right.
There! This looks like Exhibit A in the court case that gets you committed.
I mean, why would a memory machine need macaroni? They're cannelloni.
They cannellonise the time f-flux.
Look, in science, imagination is more important than intelligence.
Wow.
You know that's Albert Einstein, right? Really? 'Cause I got loads like that.
Like, um the bigger the bird, the sweeter the curd.
I think we just found Exhibit B.
Just get in the box.
So, what now? We go through the memories of all our awkward encounters to find out where this all started.
This is it.
The beginning of our repressed memories.
Come on! No standing on the bus! Uh okay.
You were just brushing off your lap, weren't you? Yeah.
That was pretty awkward.
Hey, I need a photo for the school blog.
That okay? - Oh.
- Uh Could you get on with it, please?! It's just, I wanted a photo of the cake? - Oh.
Uh - Oh.
It was the shoes.
I swear.
They -- They were all new and squeaky.
No, it wasn't.
It's better to catch it early.
Chicken pox can be a dangerous disease when you're an adult.
Hot Dog Guy's Yeah, it's like sharing a bath with your siblings -- Harmless when you're a boy, but a bit more challenging when you're a grown man.
Aah! What the Remembering this only makes things a million times worse! I thought we needed to fight fire with fire, but it only makes more fire! Which does make sense if you think about it.
Please don't tell me you're gonna set fire to anything.
No.
I was thinking more about fighting trauma with trauma.
Oh.
I remember nothing! I feel great! Me too! And this isn't awkward.
No.
No, no, no.
No, no.
No, no, no, no, no! Wa-- Uh?