The Bear (2022) s03e04 Episode Script


[CARMY] Hey.
Do you know what day it is?
[CLAIRE] It's It's Wednesday.
But I really had to think about it.
[CARMY] No, I had no idea.
Does that happen to you?
[CLAIRE] All of the time.
[CARMY] Me too.
I really liked Wednesdays as a kid.
'Cause you were halfway
through the week?
I'm gonna tell you something.
Mmm, yeah?
I have to be honest. I like Mondays.
- Mondays?
- Mm-hmm.
Anything's possible.
- Exactly.
- Hmm.
Favorite day?
Not Sundays.
Anxiety for the week?
That's when the whole
restaurant's closed.
- Explain.
So, anxiety that I have
nothing to do, I guess.
- Um
- Mm-hmm.
You have a hard time turning
it off, you know, at night?
It's like that buzzing sometimes.
It's just impossible
to turn off, you know?
- It's impossible.
- Yeah.
Your heart's beating
kinda fast. Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm great.
Are you sure?
I'm sure.
- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm okay.
Should we ask each other
that five more times?
- Okay.
- [CHUCKLES] Okay.
May I ask you a question?
[CLAIRE] What the fuck is this?
- [CARMY] Hmm.
- What happened?
[CARMY] I grabbed a really hot pot.
Well, you must have really grabbed
it, 'cause it's really deep.
Yeah, I just wasn't paying attention.
Did it, um
Did it hurt so much that
it didn't hurt at all?
This, uh this girl came in
with, like, cuts all over her
on the Fourth of July.
It's always the worst day.
That and fucking Saint Patrick's Day.
- Yeah.
- Hmm.
What's the worst time in a restaurant?
Saturday at 8:15.
Well, think about that and then
multiply it by fucking hell.
- [CHUCKLES] Okay.
But this girl came in, and
she was so beautiful.
She was, like, 17, and
she was at this party,
and she was dancing and
It just It was really bad.
Well, what happened?
She, um
She tripped and fell onto a
glass table, and it just, like
It ripped through her,
and she had cuts all over her arms
and her back and her stomach,
and it was everywhere,
and she was bleeding,
and we couldn't figure out
what the source was,
and she didn't know
She didn't know what happened.
She didn't know where she was.
And, um
we were slammed, so I
read her chart wrong.
- Yeah?
- And she had a penicillin allergy,
and she went into shock, and it was
- it was fucking terrifying.
- Shit.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
So we gave her a shot
of epinephrine and
I felt
I just I felt horrible, and
she was in surgery forever, and
when she got out,
she was covered in stitches
and skin glue, and
she was gonna have scars,
like, all over her body.
But when she when she
finally woke up, she
she, like she couldn't stop laughing.
I don't think it hurt yet.
Okay. Just say it.
What do you think?
It's, uh
It's great.
- Honey.
Do you wanna say, like,
what you actually think?
I think it's small,
it's expensive and it's
a longer ride to work.
Okay. Well, I
You You're being pretty negative.
I'm not being negative.
I think you could stay
with me and save money.
Well, I already told you
I'm getting a raise, so
But you still haven't told me what
the partnership agreement says.
[WHISPERS] Oh, my God.
I can't. [STAMMERS] It's
They're still fine-tuning
it. That's why I can't.
- Nat hasn't sent it yet. Whatever.
- Have you felt these walls?
- They're thin.
- I haven't felt the walls.
- They're thin.
- They're fine.
No. I-I don't know what's flimsier
these walls or the partnership promises.
Do you want me to kill
you? I could kill you.
It's thin.
- I'm fine with thin.
- Sydney, it's thin.
Stop. You're just saying things.
I'm not.
- You're not?
I just think you're moving too fast.
Well, you don't want me to move out.
It's not that.
I-I just want you to take your time.
Well, I can't 'cause I
already signed the lease.
[SIGHS] We better go find you a couch.
- I want one of those, like, L-shaped ones.
- No. Secondhand store.
- Secondhand store.
- That's fine. Okay. Yep.
Good morning, zabka.
You awake?
You know who you sound
like? Cousin Neil.
You're gonna have fun today.
Frank's taking you to the
Museum of Science and Industry.
What is Frank?
What's Frank?
Yeah. Who's Frank?
Frank's Mama's fiancé, baby.
What do I call him?
I don't know.
Call him whatever you want.
But he's not my uncle, like Carmy.
No, baby. Nobody's like Carmy.
But you like Frank, right?
Everything's a little
different though, huh?
And you're by yourself.
I am not by myself. I'm with you.
Not when you're not.
You think I'm alone?
Mom does.
Did she [SIGHS]
Did she say "alone" or "lonely"?
I don't know.
Baby, I am good.
Can I have a hundred candles?
Right now?
- No, for my birthday. On the cake.
- Yes.
In two months, I will
give you a hundred candles.
I only told you and Auntie DD.
Where did you see Auntie DD?
In the store with Mom.
Wow. Okay.
She's coming to the wedding.
Auntie DD's coming to the wedding?
[LAUGHS] Amazing.
That's great. [LAUGHS]
- I love you.
- I love you.
- Hey.
- Mm-hmm.
- What are you thinking about?
Hmm. I promised I'd see her before
What's that saying? "Find DD
before DD finds you"? [CHUCKLES]
- Is that what it is?
- I think so.
- Okay.
- Are you sure me leaving is okay?
- Mm-hmm.
- I want you to.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
I'll be back a week from tomorrow.
- And we can FaceTime.
- I know.
- [WHISPERS] Two weeks away.
- Two weeks?
- Yes.
Up on a hill ♪
As the day dissolves ♪
With my pencil turning
moments into line ♪
- [TINA] Hey, Jerry.
- [JERRY] Hey. Morning, Tina.
Good to see ya.
- That's it?
- That's it.
- It's kinda dead.
- Yeah.
There's fewer and fewer
months to grow vegetables now,
and 'cause of that, there's
fewer and fewer farms.
Used to be you could come down here,
buy everything you
needed for a full menu.
All in one spot.
Whatever grows together, goes together.
Whatever grows together, goes together.
Thanks, Jerry.
- You take care now.
- You too.
- Make it more elegant.
- [TED] On the right?
- Looks a little loose, doesn't it?
- It's a little "angle-y."
- Make it flush. Make it plumb.
- Flush. There you go. That looks good.
- Think Bear's gonna like this?
- He's gonna love it.
I think he's gonna love it too.
- Carm, check this out!
- Come on in here!
- [TED] Come and check it out!
- Help! Help!
- [CARMY] No!
- [BOTH] Please!
[CARMY] Shut up! I don't want to.
- Come in here because it's nice in here!
- It's really cool.
- Help us help you!
- [TED] Help us help you!
- [CARMY] Coming!
- He's coming. Chill.
- You look good.
- You look good too.
- That a choo choo train on your tie?
- It's nice, right?
- That looks good.
- Yeah.
- What? What?
- Okay, let me
- Hey, no.
- Every major food critic
- Let me!
Every major food critic.
I hate this feeling.
- [NEIL] What feeling, Carm?
- [TED] Yeah, what feeling, Carm?
- [CHEF 1] Take us there, Bear.
- [CHEF 2] Thought you'd do better.
[CHEF 3] Maybe we've reached
as far as your talent can go.
I'm not sure. Um.
This looks good though.
This is smart. Um, good job.
- Um, Ted
- Chef.
Could you please help Ebra slice
bread to get the to-gos ready?
- Honored, dawg. Absolutely.
- And, um, hey, you.
Just, uh, put these in a binder
- by the hostess stand, okay?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, no problem. Thanks for coming in.
- Okay. Thank you.
[TED] Yeah. Thank you.
- I'm proud of us.
- I'm so proud of us.
- Proud of us. Yeah.
- Okay.
If any single one of these
people come into this building
- Yeah?
- you need to realize it's code red.
- Code red.
- Code red.
[TED] Red. Absolutely.
Wait, what if they already
came in here though?
Impossible. I've already
memorized every single one.
- But I just printed this shit.
- I pre-memorized.
- That makes sense.
- Exactly.
- Your memory's so sick.
- It's the best.
- It is the best.
- Yeah, I have the best one.
- Yo, honestly
- [CARMY] Ted!
- Yeah?
- [CARMY] Ebra!
Okay! Yo, I feel like Bear is
starting to, like, respect me.
- No.
- No, like, as a man. Not a friend.
If he respected you, he would
let me know that information,
because that's a lot of
information for him to hold in.
- Yeah.
- He needs to let things go,
and he would tell me
because I'm his best friend.
And then I would be the one that
told you that he respected you.
- He hasn't said anything?
- So you know, he hasn't said anything.
- How sick is it that I work here?
- It's the best.
- I love you.
- I love you so much.
- I'm gonna go help Ebra slice some bread.
- Go, go, go.
Yeah, slice the Shut up.
[EBRAHEIM] One double dip for Eli V.
Four basket for Robert.
- [STAFF MEMBER] Finally.
- Ebra, what do you got going on over here?
- Be with you in just a second.
- Yo, Cheech.
- What's up, Carmen?
Yo, yo, keep that
smoke out of my window.
You got fucking shit everywhere.
I got heartburn just looking at
this fucking whole deal with you.
You gotta make the sandwich nice
and neat. Fluffy, not stuffy.
- "Fluffy, not stuffy."
- Don't fuck with the baskets.
People are fucking
slobs, they're assholes.
They're gonna treat 'em
like shit. Get rid of 'em.
I would work the window.
Chucky would rock bags.
Mikey rocked the register.
Shit was like General Hospital.
I worked in hospital once.
Many people died.
You're a morbid fuck, man.
[EVA] Uh "Mer-horse."
- A horse?
- A "mer-horse."
- Oh, "mer-horse"?
- Yeah.
What would you be?
- Five [GIGGLES]
- Catapult
- [STUTTERS] Caterpillar.
- Oh.
- Why?
- I don't know.
It just was the first thing
that popped into my head.
- Can I change my answer?
- Yeah.
I wouldn't mind being a fox.
That sounds like fun.
- [EVA] Oh.
- I think they're so pretty.
- Is this it?
- Yep.
- Is it all science?
- And industry.
- It's more fun than it sounds.
- Hey, guys.
Hey, what's up, Frank?
Hey, Rich. Hey, baby.
Sup, Waldo?
- Yeah. Waldo.
Dad said I could call
you whatever I want.
- Oh.
- Yeah, I I did say that.
Oh. Waldo it is.
Hey, look, your mommy left
you a surprise on the counter.
Do you wanna go in for a second?
I gotta talk to your daddy. Okay?
- [EVA] Yeah.
- You got a sec?
[RICHIE] I love you, babe. Uh.
- Yeah. Shit. Sure.
- I'll be right in, kid.
What's up?
- Uh, she, uh, you know
She asked me what to call you.
A cousin or step-person
or whatever, so
Yeah, Waldo it is.
Could be worse.
Better than asshole.
- Better than asshole.
What's up?
I'm [CHUCKLES] I'm actually
feeling a little bit nervous right now,
which is crazy.
What are you nervous about?
I wanna talk to you about
something, but, uh [CLICKS TONGUE]
I'm not quite sure how to, uh
Frank, just spit it out, dawg.
I'm feeling really
shitty about something.
What are you feeling shitty about?
Shitty about, uh
I should've given you a heads-up
before I asked Tiff to marry me.
I'm not her father.
No. [CHUCKLES] No, no.
Man, I should have talked to you.
Your daughter is amazing, man.
- Oh, I'm aware.
- [STUTTERS] Right.
And Tiff's, like
Also amazing.
And I should've been a gentleman.
You look good, by the way.
I just wish I'd said something.
- You don't need my permission, Frank.
- No, no, I know.
But I also know that, like,
this could be a little weird,
and I don't wanna add to the weirdness.
I want things to be good. And
you and I are probably gonna spend
a lot of time together, so I just
And I like that, but, uh
Look, uh, whatever.
I'm talking way too much, so
How long have you had this house?
Uh, three years.
It's beautiful.
Thanks, man.
Your parents help you?
Uh, no.
No, they're teachers and divorced,
which is maybe why I felt [CHUCKLES]
I don't know.
Look, are you sure this is okay?
I'm sure.
I really appreciate that.
Hey, you're coming, right?
- You didn't RSVP.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've been slammed.
Yeah. No, I get that. But, I mean,
The Bear is supposed
to be, like, amazing,
and we're still waiting for you
to tell us when we can come in.
When it's perfect. [CLICKS TONGUE]
Hey, I'm Adam Shapiro.
- I'm the, uh
- Oh. From, uh, Ever.
- Yeah. Oh.
- Yeah. Hey.
It's so good to bump into you.
- Yeah. Nice to meet you.
- Yeah.
Oh, it's so funny. I, um
God, I shouldn't I probably
shouldn't tell you this.
I know it's early, but I,
uh, snuck into The Bear.
Oh, when?
Two weeks ago.
How did you, uh How did
you get past Carmen and Richie?
Well, they seemed pretty
busy yelling at each other.
- That's very embarrassing.
- [CHUCKLES] No, it's all good.
You know, I've been
there. Sea legs, you know?
But it was Other than
that, the vibe was perfect.
I was with a bunch of friends,
so it was kind of under the radar.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't even wanna ask how the food was.
it was excellent.
- Thank you.
- No, really. Excellent.
I mean, there was a scallop
dish that was lights-out,
and it felt really new.
New, like, uh
Like, uh, not Carmy.
Well, it's, um It was
both of us together, so
Right. Right. Well, it was really great.
Thanks. Thanks.
Um, thank you. I-I didn't think
that that's what you were gonna say.
- Oh, what did you think I was gonna say?
- Uh, I don't know. I don't know.
It's It's been a long month.
Ah. That bad?
No, just Restaurants.
Yeah. Right? Why do we
do this to ourselves?
- 'Cause we're crazy.
- [CHUCKLES] Yeah.
What was this month's crazy?
The kind that's inherited.
But, anyway, um, I'm
running kind of late,
so I should probably head out.
- I am too.
- Okay.
You gotta stop by and eat.
- Sure. Oh.
- We'd love to have you in.
- Yeah, that'd be really nice.
- Yeah.
- Um, it was really nice to meet you.
- Yeah, you too, Chef.
- Okay. Bye.
- All right.
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
- You good?
- Yeah.
Let me.
Thanks. Grapefruit.
- Read this?
Uh, the allspice.
We are keeping that
- Thanks. Or great.
- but it needs more heat, acid.
Okay. Well
[NEIL] Has anyone seen
the very colorful tape?
- No, not now.
- No?
- No.
- Okay. Oh
Well, okay.
What did you change?
Uh, lost the habanero.
Carmen, that was the
whole point of the dish.
I know, but we changed
it to scotch bonnet,
which is also a pepper, so
I know that it's also a pepper.
That's not the point. The
point is that you changed it.
Why don't you try it
before you get pissed?
- If you wanna change it back, you can.
- I'm not pissed.
I'm just
[SIGHS] You can't just change
Okay. You know what? Fine.
I know that it's good.
I know that it's better, even.
That's not the point.
The point is something that
you're not gonna wanna talk about,
which, you know, I think illustrates
that it really is the point.
[SIGHS] This communication between
front and back of house is killing us.
Hmm. Well, Richie's
out of his mind, so
Okay, sure,
but five minutes ago,
I had Nat type and print out menus
because I was told and she was
told that the menu was locked.
In that time, did you
tell her or anyone else
that the menu was not, in fact, locked?
That there would be a change?
- No. That's bad communication.
- Mmm. Yes. Yes, thank you.
Did you get the place?
That's good. Congrats.
- Thanks.
- You, uh, still not smoking?
- Still not smoking.
How's that going? It's been,
like, three weeks, right?
- Forty-one days.
- Okay.
You miss it?
Yeah, like, every ten seconds.
- How's your dad feeling about the place?
- Ah, shit, man. [GROANS]
- You all right?
- Yeah.
Yeah. It's going around.
Go ahead. Over here.
- [CARMY] Yeah?
[CARMY] All right.
- Mm-mmm.
- Not good?
Mm-mmm. Oh.
That's awful.
Kinda like it.
- How's it going?
- All right.
What's happening?
I am researching the star system.
- Hmm.
- Yeah.
I didn't realize you were
into astrology. [CHUCKLES]
Did you know that stars dictate
whether any given restaurant
is worth a walk, drive or flight?
- [RICHIE] I did not.
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah. They're based on taste, creativity.
- Mm-hmm.
One star is excellent.
What's two stars?
Two stars is better.
Natalie, may I express a thought?
- You may.
- Thank you.
Speaking for myself,
I do not give a flying
fuck into a rolling doughnut
about the gastronomical proclivities
of some dusty French
tire marketing exec.
I mean, I'm a Pirelli guy.
I have been from way back.
I would say that a Goodyear's probably
a more practical choice
for Chicago winters.
But fucking Michelin
mangia cazzo, no?
Okay. I'll let them know.
Hey, what is that?
Oh, uh, Zen garden.
Kyoto, Philosopher's Path.
[SUGAR] Explain.
Well, this, uh this director
that I admire, he visited this.
And when he got there, he was like,
"What is this? A bunch of
just rocks and combed sand?"
He didn't really, you know, know
what to make of it, but then,
slowly, he began to realize
Yeah. That the rocks are people.
And we're all separated.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Fucking yeah. Exactly.
And that this garden is, in fact,
an illustration of human nature,
and how we are, all of
us, alone in this world.
How did you know that?
Pete. He's a Friedkin fan.
Yeah. Well, you know, his
movies work on several levels.
I'm gonna go there someday.
You should take Pete.
- Mmm. Yeah, I'll get back to you.
- How's my niece?
- Oh
She's almost here. [SIGHS]
Hey, what was that?
Tell me.
I'm just, um
I'm thinking about how
to not let what's
what's in here
How to not let that get to her.
Yeah, I think about that all the time.
You do?
- I got nothing though. You have any luck?
- I have nothing. [CHUCKLES]
How's Evie?
You think, like, it's
better if I, like, back off?
What do you mean?
Like, I don't wanna back off
but is it confusing for her?
Like, you know how
everyone's talking about
how Frank is the shit, and, like
I don't know. Maybe it's
weird that I'm, like, around.
No, I think it would be
weird if you weren't around.
What does she think?
- Tiff?
- No. Evie.
She thinks I'm alone.
Are you?
Hey, did we make the week?
What's, um What's tomorrow?
Tomorrow we would have made the week.
- [SCOFFS] Fuck.
- Yeah.
A day late, 5,000 short.
Always. Always.
Fucking over and over and over.
- Jimmy's gonna fucking freak out.
Wonder who's calling me? [SIGHS]
Hey, this is Natalie.
Photos? For what?
[CARMY] Right. So cut here.
See how it's all nice and tight
under the pope's nose there?
[TINA] Why do they
call it the pope's nose?
[CARMY] Well, what's
it look like to you?
- Chef Sidney, a word.
- Sup?
Why is the Tribune
coming to take pictures?
Chef Sydney, why is Chef
Carmen saying "shit" like that?
Because we're being reviewed.
[TINA] Like, tonight?
they've already been here.
Uh-huh ♪
This is beginning to hurt ♪
This is beginning to be serious ♪
It used to be a game ♪
Now it's a cryin' shame ♪
'Cause you don't wanna
play around no more ♪
Uh-huh ♪
Sometimes I push too hard ♪
Sometimes you fall
and skin your knee ♪
I never meant to do all
that I've done to you ♪
Please, baby ♪
Say it's not too late ♪
To get you, uh-huh ♪
Get you, uh-huh ♪
Get you, get you, get you ♪
I can't believe ♪
What you've done to me ♪
What I did to them ♪
You've done to me, oh ♪
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