The Epic Tales of Captain Underpants (2018) s01e13 Episode Script
Captain Underpants and the Troublesome Treachery of the Thieving Toot Fairy
1 [both laugh.]
[George.]
Previously on Captain Underpants George and Harold, our heroes, were on the verge of being expelled 'cause they couldn't stop pranking.
They went to the school superintendent, Dr.
Vil Endenemys, to protest, and he said [mimics Dr.
Vil.]
"Principals can't make up rules.
You bring me the rule book Krupp changed and I'll fire him!" But Mr.
Krupp locked the book in a safe and What's with the bear head? Dude, this recap is boring.
-Spicing it up with bears.
-Good call.
I'll speed it up.
[George.]
So the boys made a fart come to life and named him Smartsy Fartsy and told him to get the book, but Smartsy got all mean and tried to trap the whole school so they got Captain Underpants and they saved the day.
[exhales.]
Also, Melvin got banned forever from going to the smart school of his dreams and he blames us.
[exhales.]
Okay, I think that's it.
What are you drawing? The ultimate bear battle! Robo-Grizzlies versus Panda Knights! A conflict as old as time.
-And bears.
-[George.]
Awesome.
So George and Harold make comic books - We're cool! - Me, too! But they had a mean old principal Who told them what to -Blah, blah, blah, blah.
- So they got a hypno-ring And first, they made him dance Then, accidentally, kinda on purpose Turned him into Captain Underpants Tra-la-la! With a snap, he's the Captain Not the brightest man And don't forget, when he gets wet - You're back where you began - Blah, blah, blah Put it all together What could possibly go wrong? Now this is the end Of the Captain Underpants song - By George Beard and Harold Hutchins - Tra-la-la! Remember the previous episode.
We last left Melvin in this cupcake shop talking to this mysterious dude in the creepy robe.
Only you control your future.
Yeah, no, I get that.
But who are you and what possible reason could there be for your robe? It's dramatic! Dr.
Vil Endenemys, the school superintendent? Correct.
Thank you for addressing me by my name and title.
And I will use my power to get you accepted into Eliteanati Academy in exchange for a favor.
For that, I'll do anything! Except help George and Harold.
I need you to [both.]
help George and Harold.
Saw that coming.
[narrator.]
This is George Beard and Harold Hutchins.
George is the kid on the left with the tie and the flat top.
Harold is the one on the right with the T-shirt and the bad haircut.
-Remember that now.
-You're probably wondering why I asked you here.
-To eat onion rings? 'Cause we will.
-No.
I brought you here because I know you're trying to get my rule book.
So I hid it where you'll never find it.
And if you do somehow find it, I'll catch you trying to get it, which will bring you to my office for visit 500.
And I'll expel you.
[laughs.]
I can't lose! [Harold grunting.]
Fine.
Have one.
-[both chomping.]
-I said one! [muffled.]
You can't lose unless we win.
-What? -[muffled.]
Which we will.
What? I can't Just chew! [both munching.]
-You can't lose unless we win.
-Which we will.
Very well.
Then we know where we stand.
-Yes, we do.
-Our positions are clear.
-So we're done? -No, we have to wait for the check.
[background music playing in diner.]
-Can we have more onion rings? -No! [narrator.]
If you're thinking this is the Tooth Fairy, you're close.
If you're wondering why you're seeing it, there's a reason.
[farting.]
[laughing.]
Ah, we're one office visit away from being expelled.
We gotta get that book to Dr.
Vil Endenemys.
You got his name right! That class really paid off.
[computer.]
Congratulations! You know how to say "Dr.
Vil Endenemys.
" Hey, Stanley! What's sweating? Ha! Still me.
Hey, have you guys noticed someone sneaking into your room at night? But instead of taking teeth, they steal your farts? You mean like a Toot Fairy? Oh, you know who I'm talking about? No, but that's a great idea for a comic book.
Thanks! No one believes me.
I need proof.
I'm gonna stay up all night and catch that thief.
A stakeout! That's a great idea! I am not spending the night at Stanley's, watching him sweat and fart.
Not Stanley.
Mr.
Krupp.
We're gonna spy on him, and he'll lead us to the book.
We'll be on him like white on rice.
Stakeout! -[upbeat music plays.]
-[siren wails.]
Mmm, steak and rice.
I'll admit it.
Steak on a stakeout works.
We better check in on Krupp.
[woman on TV.]
Do you suffer from the suggestion that you might be suffering from something suggested? Interesting suggestion.
Yes! Ask your doctor about what he suggests for your suggested suffering suggestions.
That's a good idea, I'll do that.
He's still talking to the TV.
Man, that is one lonely dude.
He's not going anywhere until his hairs are curled.
Wanna make a comic? I got a great idea.
Me, too.
[both.]
Toot Fairy! [comic narrator.]
Everybody knows the Tooth Fairy, who flies around at night and trades teeth for money, which is weird, but okay.
The Tooth Fairy had a little brother named Toot Fairy, like with a "T.
" Toot! But he was mean, and instead of teeth, he collected farts.
Like on purpose.
What? 'Cause he was building a super fart bomb! He took all the farts and left everybody fartless, which, like You don't like other farts, but you like your own, right? And the kids loved the fart noises, like "brzzat" and "frap" and "weenk" and "ruppita, rup, rup, rup" and "skeep.
" You get it.
And now? No farts! They got all sad.
So Captain Underpants arrived to cheer up the kids with balloon animals! But he could only make a snake, a big worm, and a line on the highway.
The kids were like, "Cough-cough, lame!" Captain Underpants was like, "Sorry, I couldn't get into Clown College.
" "We miss our farts," said the kids.
So, Captain Underpants went after Toot Fairy.
'cause "tra-la-la.
" Captain Underpants found the Toot Fairy, and he's all, "Stop stealing farts!" Toot Fairy goes, "Too late! My super fart bomb super fart bomb is about to go off.
Time for global farticide! And I'll never tell you it's on top of the Eiffel Tower in France, comma, Europe.
That's a secret!" And, like, an hour later, tick-tock, Captain Underpants was all, "Ha-ha-ha, I figured out your sneaky puzzle.
It's on top of the Eiffel Tower in France, comma, Europe.
" And he flew there to stop the super fart bomb.
Captain Underpants got there and opened up the bomb.
"Cut the red wire.
" But there was no red wire.
They were mostly kinda blue, like, indigo.
Anyway, he had to make the ultimate sacrifice.
We mean fly into space to get the super fart bomb away from Earth! Earth! He made it, when the bomb went off! [mimics explosion, groans.]
And it blasted him all the way back to Earth, and it didn't look good until he landed in his pile of lame balloon animals, which got all twisted into funny hats for the kids.
"Yay!" they yelled.
"Tra-la-la!" The end.
-Has he moved yet? -[woman on TV.]
Are you lonely? -Do you wish you had friends? -Ha, who needs 'em? I've got it all.
I'm wearing hair rollers and talking to my TV in an empty house.
[groans.]
I can't take this anymore.
-He's never gonna leave.
-Allow me.
-[line ringing.]
-Hello? [mimics Italian accent.]
Hello-a, it's-a me-a, Pizza Pete! -Why are you doing that? -[normal voice.]
I panicked.
So-a, you know-a the place-a you put the rule book-a? Sure do, Pizza Pete.
Why'd ya ask? -Well, it's-a on fire-a.
-Fire-a? Fire-a! [screams, grunts.]
-Come on! -[engine revs.]
[tires screeching.]
Wow, that-a worked-a better than I thought-a.
You can stop the accent now.
[yelling.]
Fire-a! [screaming, grunting.]
Fire-a! Well, that was easy.
-He took the long way.
-But now we know where the rule book is.
More steak? Welcome back to Hank's Hidee-Holes, Mr.
Krupp.
Hank, fire in your Hidee-Holes! What fire? Ain't no fire.
But Pizza Pete told me my vault was on fire.
If I had a nickel for every time I heard that, I'd have, like, 23 cents.
So, there's no fire? Nope.
My Hidee-Holes are fire-free! That's the Hank's Hidee-Holes guarantee or my name isn't Hank.
Your book is safe in vault 17.
That's vault 17, just to say it again for no good reason.
Looks like we're gonna pay a visit to vault 17.
Why? Oh, right, 'cause that's where the rule book is.
-I'm all caught up.
-Time to do some recon.
Got something to hide? Hide it in one of Hank's Hidee-Holes.
Our underground tunnels are chock-full of deadly traps, futuristic doors, snakes, armed Mecha-arms, other snakes, and a robot sphinx.
You bet.
All leading to impenetrable titanium vaults.
How are we gonna get through that? The only way to get past all that is with a living gas cloud.
Good thing those don't exist.
[laughs.]
We know a living gas cloud.
Smartsy Fartsy.
But he's gone.
And Melvin broke the Elevapor 2000.
-So now what? -Now we need a new living gas cloud, which means we need Melvin to make a new Elevapor 2000.
But Melvin will never help us.
Unless we butter him up.
-Hey, buddy, we got some beaker -I'll help.
[shattering.]
Oh, it's so real.
-[Harold.]
An otter pirate.
-[George.]
And he's swinging a frozen ham.
Careful! There are incredibly fragile things in this room.
-Whoa! -[Melvin.]
Enough! The new Elevapor 2000 is complete, no thanks to you two.
Now we will proceed to the target location to retrieve the rule book.
[Toot Fairy.]
No! Now I will take that machine and have my vengeance.
Whoa, the Toot Fairy is real.
I was hoping Melvin would build a new Elevapor 2000.
And you simple twins did all the heavy lifting for me, Smartsy Fartsy! Smartsy Fartsy? Why were you dressed like that? I disguised myself as the Tooth Fairy to access bedrooms and steal farts.
Now, I'll use this machine to create a fart army and make all non-gasses kneel before me! So you're the Toot Fairy! [both laughing.]
You will fear me! [chuckles.]
I like your crown.
Silence! You will give me your respect! Or I will take it, along with all your farts! [laughing continues.]
I am no laughing matter! -[both laughing.]
-Melvin, you have friends? Over.
I meant you have friends over.
Why don't they join us for dinner? -Actually -I insist.
[gulps.]
So, uh, Mr.
Fartsy, have you done much traveling? Oh, yes.
As a disembodied particle, I floated thrice around the world.
Globetrotter.
Fascinating.
More of a globe-floater, if you will.
Bit of a drifter.
Oh.
[chuckles.]
Oh, you're so funny, Mr.
Fartsy.
Have you been to Paris? Ah, oui.
Paris.
You haven't lived until you visit the city of lights.
Let me describe it to you in excruciating detail.
I'll relish every word.
Smartsy's gonna notice we snuck out soon, so we've gotta move fast.
Melvin, you hack us into vault 17 while we go get backup.
I don't take orders from you chimps.
[echoing.]
Eliteanati Academy.
Help George and Harold.
I mean, sure.
Great.
Meet you back here.
-[doorbell rings.]
-George and Harold? What are you? -[fingers snapping.]
-[thudding.]
Tra-la-la! [mower engine running.]
It's okay.
School project! Why is that guy mowing his lawn at night? The FBI needs to access my files in the middle of the night, -and they sent a kid to do it? -I'm the best in the business.
I have a lot of government contracts and Oh, never mind.
[gasps.]
-Melvin, how's the hacking going? -This is your backup? Him? -Wait.
Back up? Okay.
Beep, beep.
-[Hank snoring.]
What did you do to Hank? I sprayed him with a very potent nightmare agent.
[screams.]
He'll be fine.
We gotta get that rule book before that evil fart gets bored of Melvin's mom.
-How dare you! -Beep.
Hey, this isn't so bad.
-[George and Harold scream.]
-Scaly pipes are leaking gas! -[snoring.]
-That stuff works on snakes too? -'Sup, guys! -[all gasp.]
-[hisses, snores.]
-They'll be fine.
Don't worry, chums, I got this! Yes! -[George cheers.]
-I'm getting my undies in a knot.
-[grunts.]
-We gotta keep moving.
Ugh! Wow! These are scarier snakes.
Why is there a river down here? -Harold, what are you doing? -I'm getting great stuff.
This one's just weird.
Checkmate.
[gasps.]
I am the robot sphinx, final guardian of the Hidee-Holes.
Answer my riddle and pass.
Fail and perish.
Let us begin.
A phantom finger and a dancing scimitar were weaving the strands of time Ow, jeez, that's my nose.
Man, that really stings.
Oh, come on! It isn't gonna hit anybody else? No time to figure that out.
This is it, vault 17.
All we need to do is make a smart fart and we're in.
Disgusting! Why don't we use literally any other gas but that? Sure.
What other gas you got? Fine.
Fart wins.
George, let 'er rip.
Will do.
But everyone be nice.
We don't want another Smartsy.
[farts.]
-[machine whirs.]
-[dings.]
-Hi, I'm alive now.
-Whoa! He sounds like the last fart guy.
[narrator.]
We can't afford another actor.
[laughs.]
Yeah.
Wait, what? So we need a favor.
Can you get into that door and unlock it? I don't see why not.
[bolt clanging.]
[both.]
Yeah! -Whoa! -[gasps.]
There's the rule book.
-Whoa! -[Harold.]
The pedestal's a bit much.
We don't have to be afraid of being expelled anymore.
[snickers.]
Ah -We've got a principal to fire.
-Oh! Oh! Can we stop and get pie first? And after, tell me who I am and give my life meaning? Sure, if there's time after pie.
[both gasp.]
[machine whirs, farts.]
So predictable.
You did exactly what I expected you to do and handed me my fart army! So begins a new era of ultimate gassiness! [Harold and George laugh.]
No! That's not funny.
I'm saying a serious thing! Can't we all just be friends? -No.
-[Melvin.]
Fart synthesis? Barbaric and beautiful.
-You monster! -He never even got to taste pie.
You crossed the line, the pie line.
Fart soldiers, farttack! [narrator.]
This time we're gonna show you the incredibly graphic violence.
We caught it on our phones and uploaded it so you can watch in Vide-O-Rama, with commercial interruptions, sorry.
Silent But Deadly.
- Twinkle Toilet! If you're going -[narrator.]
Cuts Like A Cheese.
- Chew-Chew-Choo -[narrator.]
Hot Air Buffoon! Hank's Hidee-Holes! Got something to hide? We got a hole for you.
Please save me.
A crazy fart locked me in one of my own holes, and I'm running out of oxygen.
[woman singing.]
Please rescue Hank He's got minutes to live Hank's Hidee-Holes Oh! No! Farts go out, not in.
Fart soldiers, infartrate them all! [George and Harold coughing, gagging.]
-You won't get away with this! -He already did.
Look at us.
And now I will seal you in this Hidee-Hole forever! Toodle-loo.
-I can't move.
So much pressure.
-[Harold farts.]
Good thinking, Harold.
We can fart our way to freedom! What? I mean, yes, exactly! Guys, fart like the wind! [all shouting, farting.]
We're not gonna make it! I'm farting as hard as I can! -[grunts.]
-[farts.]
Of course.
Ah! [Harold.]
Oh, no, they're everywhere! Well, this isn't good for tourism.
You've escaped? Oh, well.
You're just in time for Fartmageddon! [boys laugh.]
-Fartmageddon! -[cell phone clicks.]
No! That's not funny.
That's a serious word! You're not trapped.
You can fart yourselves free.
Just put your cheeks together and blow! [farting.]
[narrator.]
span style="style1"/The bloated residents of Piqua Ha-ha! farted their way back to normal.
Fart army, if the humans will not obey, make them fartsplode.
[all gasp.]
We gotta round up all these fart guys before we all explode.
-But how can we contain them? -Ooh, can I get one of these? Please! [clamoring.]
And stay in there.
[groans.]
I'll never get this taste out of my mouth! [narrator.]
He won't.
No! You've made a mockery of all things fart! The balloons, the noises, the jokes.
But I am not a joke.
I am a fart.
Alive and proud.
I want to be celebrated, not ridiculed.
Admired, not mocked.
Is it too much to ask that instead of being laughed at, I am liked? Actually, you're getting lots of likes.
What's this? Likes, you say? I am liked? They respect me.
From this day forward, humans and farts can live together, in peace.
[all cheering.]
As long as I continue to get theoretical admiration from strangers.
Aw.
Well, that was easy.
Okay, now we just need to Wait, wait, where is the? Rule book? After I was left behind in the tunnel, I went back.
So many snakes! To retrieve the rule book you forgot.
No big deal.
I'm fine.
-Wow! Thanks.
-Yeah, we make a great team.
Just get rid of Krupp.
-[mower engine running.]
-So when does the magic show start? [grunts.]
I'm naked and outside! Again! [screams.]
Can't believe we're getting rid of Krupp tomorrow.
Yeah.
[sighs.]
Hmm.
-Unless we don't get rid of him.
-What? If we get expelled, we've still got each other.
But being principal is all Mr.
Krupp's got.
-We gotta give the book back to Krupp.
-That'll be visit 500.
Yep.
[school bell ringing.]
-[door opening.]
-Huh? -[door closing.]
-George and Harold? [dings.]
[yells, laughs.]
-Whoo! Hee-hoo! -[glass shatters.]
[narrator.]
Krupp danced as if he'd practiced for this every night.
Because he had.
Yes! A whoop-whoop, whoop-whoop-whoop! Jaba-daba-ding-dong! [laughs.]
Yes! I've imagined this moment a thousand times, and now that it's here, it's even sweeter than I imagined! Imagine that! Oh, I just did! [laughs.]
[inhales deeply, blows.]
What? My rule book? -How did you get this? -It doesn't matter.
We were going to give it to Dr.
Vil Endenemys to get you fired before you could expel us but that felt like a mean thing.
And we thought, we're not like that.
We're not like -[whimpers.]
Me? -Yeah, you.
So we're giving it back to you instead.
We were wrong and we accept our fate.
And sorry.
We apologize.
What? Huh.
No.
[groans.]
No, no, no, no, no! You can't do this to me.
Not now.
I was so close.
But then you were nice! You even apologized! Now I can't expel you! I can't believe this is happening! Why did you give me my book? Wait, this isn't the rule book.
It's a cookbook.
-A cookbook! -[Melvin.]
That's right.
My mother's cookbook.
I switched the books! I couldn't trust you to do the right thing, with your bleeding hearts and miniscule minds.
-So I gave the real book to him.
-[Harold and George.]
Dr.
Vil Endenemys! -The school superintendent! -How long have you been there? That's right.
That is who I am.
And Mr.
Krupp, for crimes against academia and humanity, but mainly for scribbling rules in the rulebook, I pronounce you fired! George Beard and Harold Hutchins, for a history of behavior so disruptive, it can no longer be tolerated within these walls, I hereby pronounce you expelled! -But -Wait, I'm not done.
You see, my real name is not Vil Endenemys.
I hear you boys like rearranging signs, so rearrange the letters to find my true identity.
-Do we have to? -Can't you just tell us? No, you're ruining it! "Smelly Dive"? Really? Does that sound like a name? "Evil Enemy.
" You're getting closer.
Now try an actual name.
-Aah -Wait, I think I got it.
I see it.
But [both.]
"Melvin Sneedly"? I? You? Me? You what? That's right.
I am Melvin Sneedly from the future.
-Oh, and I'm a cyborg.
-[George gasps.]
I've come back to right the wrongs of my past, and I start by getting rid of all of you.
-What? -Not you, Melvin.
For I am future Melvin Sneedly, and you three are gone! [Melvins laughing.]
[George.]
Previously on Captain Underpants George and Harold, our heroes, were on the verge of being expelled 'cause they couldn't stop pranking.
They went to the school superintendent, Dr.
Vil Endenemys, to protest, and he said [mimics Dr.
Vil.]
"Principals can't make up rules.
You bring me the rule book Krupp changed and I'll fire him!" But Mr.
Krupp locked the book in a safe and What's with the bear head? Dude, this recap is boring.
-Spicing it up with bears.
-Good call.
I'll speed it up.
[George.]
So the boys made a fart come to life and named him Smartsy Fartsy and told him to get the book, but Smartsy got all mean and tried to trap the whole school so they got Captain Underpants and they saved the day.
[exhales.]
Also, Melvin got banned forever from going to the smart school of his dreams and he blames us.
[exhales.]
Okay, I think that's it.
What are you drawing? The ultimate bear battle! Robo-Grizzlies versus Panda Knights! A conflict as old as time.
-And bears.
-[George.]
Awesome.
So George and Harold make comic books - We're cool! - Me, too! But they had a mean old principal Who told them what to -Blah, blah, blah, blah.
- So they got a hypno-ring And first, they made him dance Then, accidentally, kinda on purpose Turned him into Captain Underpants Tra-la-la! With a snap, he's the Captain Not the brightest man And don't forget, when he gets wet - You're back where you began - Blah, blah, blah Put it all together What could possibly go wrong? Now this is the end Of the Captain Underpants song - By George Beard and Harold Hutchins - Tra-la-la! Remember the previous episode.
We last left Melvin in this cupcake shop talking to this mysterious dude in the creepy robe.
Only you control your future.
Yeah, no, I get that.
But who are you and what possible reason could there be for your robe? It's dramatic! Dr.
Vil Endenemys, the school superintendent? Correct.
Thank you for addressing me by my name and title.
And I will use my power to get you accepted into Eliteanati Academy in exchange for a favor.
For that, I'll do anything! Except help George and Harold.
I need you to [both.]
help George and Harold.
Saw that coming.
[narrator.]
This is George Beard and Harold Hutchins.
George is the kid on the left with the tie and the flat top.
Harold is the one on the right with the T-shirt and the bad haircut.
-Remember that now.
-You're probably wondering why I asked you here.
-To eat onion rings? 'Cause we will.
-No.
I brought you here because I know you're trying to get my rule book.
So I hid it where you'll never find it.
And if you do somehow find it, I'll catch you trying to get it, which will bring you to my office for visit 500.
And I'll expel you.
[laughs.]
I can't lose! [Harold grunting.]
Fine.
Have one.
-[both chomping.]
-I said one! [muffled.]
You can't lose unless we win.
-What? -[muffled.]
Which we will.
What? I can't Just chew! [both munching.]
-You can't lose unless we win.
-Which we will.
Very well.
Then we know where we stand.
-Yes, we do.
-Our positions are clear.
-So we're done? -No, we have to wait for the check.
[background music playing in diner.]
-Can we have more onion rings? -No! [narrator.]
If you're thinking this is the Tooth Fairy, you're close.
If you're wondering why you're seeing it, there's a reason.
[farting.]
[laughing.]
Ah, we're one office visit away from being expelled.
We gotta get that book to Dr.
Vil Endenemys.
You got his name right! That class really paid off.
[computer.]
Congratulations! You know how to say "Dr.
Vil Endenemys.
" Hey, Stanley! What's sweating? Ha! Still me.
Hey, have you guys noticed someone sneaking into your room at night? But instead of taking teeth, they steal your farts? You mean like a Toot Fairy? Oh, you know who I'm talking about? No, but that's a great idea for a comic book.
Thanks! No one believes me.
I need proof.
I'm gonna stay up all night and catch that thief.
A stakeout! That's a great idea! I am not spending the night at Stanley's, watching him sweat and fart.
Not Stanley.
Mr.
Krupp.
We're gonna spy on him, and he'll lead us to the book.
We'll be on him like white on rice.
Stakeout! -[upbeat music plays.]
-[siren wails.]
Mmm, steak and rice.
I'll admit it.
Steak on a stakeout works.
We better check in on Krupp.
[woman on TV.]
Do you suffer from the suggestion that you might be suffering from something suggested? Interesting suggestion.
Yes! Ask your doctor about what he suggests for your suggested suffering suggestions.
That's a good idea, I'll do that.
He's still talking to the TV.
Man, that is one lonely dude.
He's not going anywhere until his hairs are curled.
Wanna make a comic? I got a great idea.
Me, too.
[both.]
Toot Fairy! [comic narrator.]
Everybody knows the Tooth Fairy, who flies around at night and trades teeth for money, which is weird, but okay.
The Tooth Fairy had a little brother named Toot Fairy, like with a "T.
" Toot! But he was mean, and instead of teeth, he collected farts.
Like on purpose.
What? 'Cause he was building a super fart bomb! He took all the farts and left everybody fartless, which, like You don't like other farts, but you like your own, right? And the kids loved the fart noises, like "brzzat" and "frap" and "weenk" and "ruppita, rup, rup, rup" and "skeep.
" You get it.
And now? No farts! They got all sad.
So Captain Underpants arrived to cheer up the kids with balloon animals! But he could only make a snake, a big worm, and a line on the highway.
The kids were like, "Cough-cough, lame!" Captain Underpants was like, "Sorry, I couldn't get into Clown College.
" "We miss our farts," said the kids.
So, Captain Underpants went after Toot Fairy.
'cause "tra-la-la.
" Captain Underpants found the Toot Fairy, and he's all, "Stop stealing farts!" Toot Fairy goes, "Too late! My super fart bomb super fart bomb is about to go off.
Time for global farticide! And I'll never tell you it's on top of the Eiffel Tower in France, comma, Europe.
That's a secret!" And, like, an hour later, tick-tock, Captain Underpants was all, "Ha-ha-ha, I figured out your sneaky puzzle.
It's on top of the Eiffel Tower in France, comma, Europe.
" And he flew there to stop the super fart bomb.
Captain Underpants got there and opened up the bomb.
"Cut the red wire.
" But there was no red wire.
They were mostly kinda blue, like, indigo.
Anyway, he had to make the ultimate sacrifice.
We mean fly into space to get the super fart bomb away from Earth! Earth! He made it, when the bomb went off! [mimics explosion, groans.]
And it blasted him all the way back to Earth, and it didn't look good until he landed in his pile of lame balloon animals, which got all twisted into funny hats for the kids.
"Yay!" they yelled.
"Tra-la-la!" The end.
-Has he moved yet? -[woman on TV.]
Are you lonely? -Do you wish you had friends? -Ha, who needs 'em? I've got it all.
I'm wearing hair rollers and talking to my TV in an empty house.
[groans.]
I can't take this anymore.
-He's never gonna leave.
-Allow me.
-[line ringing.]
-Hello? [mimics Italian accent.]
Hello-a, it's-a me-a, Pizza Pete! -Why are you doing that? -[normal voice.]
I panicked.
So-a, you know-a the place-a you put the rule book-a? Sure do, Pizza Pete.
Why'd ya ask? -Well, it's-a on fire-a.
-Fire-a? Fire-a! [screams, grunts.]
-Come on! -[engine revs.]
[tires screeching.]
Wow, that-a worked-a better than I thought-a.
You can stop the accent now.
[yelling.]
Fire-a! [screaming, grunting.]
Fire-a! Well, that was easy.
-He took the long way.
-But now we know where the rule book is.
More steak? Welcome back to Hank's Hidee-Holes, Mr.
Krupp.
Hank, fire in your Hidee-Holes! What fire? Ain't no fire.
But Pizza Pete told me my vault was on fire.
If I had a nickel for every time I heard that, I'd have, like, 23 cents.
So, there's no fire? Nope.
My Hidee-Holes are fire-free! That's the Hank's Hidee-Holes guarantee or my name isn't Hank.
Your book is safe in vault 17.
That's vault 17, just to say it again for no good reason.
Looks like we're gonna pay a visit to vault 17.
Why? Oh, right, 'cause that's where the rule book is.
-I'm all caught up.
-Time to do some recon.
Got something to hide? Hide it in one of Hank's Hidee-Holes.
Our underground tunnels are chock-full of deadly traps, futuristic doors, snakes, armed Mecha-arms, other snakes, and a robot sphinx.
You bet.
All leading to impenetrable titanium vaults.
How are we gonna get through that? The only way to get past all that is with a living gas cloud.
Good thing those don't exist.
[laughs.]
We know a living gas cloud.
Smartsy Fartsy.
But he's gone.
And Melvin broke the Elevapor 2000.
-So now what? -Now we need a new living gas cloud, which means we need Melvin to make a new Elevapor 2000.
But Melvin will never help us.
Unless we butter him up.
-Hey, buddy, we got some beaker -I'll help.
[shattering.]
Oh, it's so real.
-[Harold.]
An otter pirate.
-[George.]
And he's swinging a frozen ham.
Careful! There are incredibly fragile things in this room.
-Whoa! -[Melvin.]
Enough! The new Elevapor 2000 is complete, no thanks to you two.
Now we will proceed to the target location to retrieve the rule book.
[Toot Fairy.]
No! Now I will take that machine and have my vengeance.
Whoa, the Toot Fairy is real.
I was hoping Melvin would build a new Elevapor 2000.
And you simple twins did all the heavy lifting for me, Smartsy Fartsy! Smartsy Fartsy? Why were you dressed like that? I disguised myself as the Tooth Fairy to access bedrooms and steal farts.
Now, I'll use this machine to create a fart army and make all non-gasses kneel before me! So you're the Toot Fairy! [both laughing.]
You will fear me! [chuckles.]
I like your crown.
Silence! You will give me your respect! Or I will take it, along with all your farts! [laughing continues.]
I am no laughing matter! -[both laughing.]
-Melvin, you have friends? Over.
I meant you have friends over.
Why don't they join us for dinner? -Actually -I insist.
[gulps.]
So, uh, Mr.
Fartsy, have you done much traveling? Oh, yes.
As a disembodied particle, I floated thrice around the world.
Globetrotter.
Fascinating.
More of a globe-floater, if you will.
Bit of a drifter.
Oh.
[chuckles.]
Oh, you're so funny, Mr.
Fartsy.
Have you been to Paris? Ah, oui.
Paris.
You haven't lived until you visit the city of lights.
Let me describe it to you in excruciating detail.
I'll relish every word.
Smartsy's gonna notice we snuck out soon, so we've gotta move fast.
Melvin, you hack us into vault 17 while we go get backup.
I don't take orders from you chimps.
[echoing.]
Eliteanati Academy.
Help George and Harold.
I mean, sure.
Great.
Meet you back here.
-[doorbell rings.]
-George and Harold? What are you? -[fingers snapping.]
-[thudding.]
Tra-la-la! [mower engine running.]
It's okay.
School project! Why is that guy mowing his lawn at night? The FBI needs to access my files in the middle of the night, -and they sent a kid to do it? -I'm the best in the business.
I have a lot of government contracts and Oh, never mind.
[gasps.]
-Melvin, how's the hacking going? -This is your backup? Him? -Wait.
Back up? Okay.
Beep, beep.
-[Hank snoring.]
What did you do to Hank? I sprayed him with a very potent nightmare agent.
[screams.]
He'll be fine.
We gotta get that rule book before that evil fart gets bored of Melvin's mom.
-How dare you! -Beep.
Hey, this isn't so bad.
-[George and Harold scream.]
-Scaly pipes are leaking gas! -[snoring.]
-That stuff works on snakes too? -'Sup, guys! -[all gasp.]
-[hisses, snores.]
-They'll be fine.
Don't worry, chums, I got this! Yes! -[George cheers.]
-I'm getting my undies in a knot.
-[grunts.]
-We gotta keep moving.
Ugh! Wow! These are scarier snakes.
Why is there a river down here? -Harold, what are you doing? -I'm getting great stuff.
This one's just weird.
Checkmate.
[gasps.]
I am the robot sphinx, final guardian of the Hidee-Holes.
Answer my riddle and pass.
Fail and perish.
Let us begin.
A phantom finger and a dancing scimitar were weaving the strands of time Ow, jeez, that's my nose.
Man, that really stings.
Oh, come on! It isn't gonna hit anybody else? No time to figure that out.
This is it, vault 17.
All we need to do is make a smart fart and we're in.
Disgusting! Why don't we use literally any other gas but that? Sure.
What other gas you got? Fine.
Fart wins.
George, let 'er rip.
Will do.
But everyone be nice.
We don't want another Smartsy.
[farts.]
-[machine whirs.]
-[dings.]
-Hi, I'm alive now.
-Whoa! He sounds like the last fart guy.
[narrator.]
We can't afford another actor.
[laughs.]
Yeah.
Wait, what? So we need a favor.
Can you get into that door and unlock it? I don't see why not.
[bolt clanging.]
[both.]
Yeah! -Whoa! -[gasps.]
There's the rule book.
-Whoa! -[Harold.]
The pedestal's a bit much.
We don't have to be afraid of being expelled anymore.
[snickers.]
Ah -We've got a principal to fire.
-Oh! Oh! Can we stop and get pie first? And after, tell me who I am and give my life meaning? Sure, if there's time after pie.
[both gasp.]
[machine whirs, farts.]
So predictable.
You did exactly what I expected you to do and handed me my fart army! So begins a new era of ultimate gassiness! [Harold and George laugh.]
No! That's not funny.
I'm saying a serious thing! Can't we all just be friends? -No.
-[Melvin.]
Fart synthesis? Barbaric and beautiful.
-You monster! -He never even got to taste pie.
You crossed the line, the pie line.
Fart soldiers, farttack! [narrator.]
This time we're gonna show you the incredibly graphic violence.
We caught it on our phones and uploaded it so you can watch in Vide-O-Rama, with commercial interruptions, sorry.
Silent But Deadly.
- Twinkle Toilet! If you're going -[narrator.]
Cuts Like A Cheese.
- Chew-Chew-Choo -[narrator.]
Hot Air Buffoon! Hank's Hidee-Holes! Got something to hide? We got a hole for you.
Please save me.
A crazy fart locked me in one of my own holes, and I'm running out of oxygen.
[woman singing.]
Please rescue Hank He's got minutes to live Hank's Hidee-Holes Oh! No! Farts go out, not in.
Fart soldiers, infartrate them all! [George and Harold coughing, gagging.]
-You won't get away with this! -He already did.
Look at us.
And now I will seal you in this Hidee-Hole forever! Toodle-loo.
-I can't move.
So much pressure.
-[Harold farts.]
Good thinking, Harold.
We can fart our way to freedom! What? I mean, yes, exactly! Guys, fart like the wind! [all shouting, farting.]
We're not gonna make it! I'm farting as hard as I can! -[grunts.]
-[farts.]
Of course.
Ah! [Harold.]
Oh, no, they're everywhere! Well, this isn't good for tourism.
You've escaped? Oh, well.
You're just in time for Fartmageddon! [boys laugh.]
-Fartmageddon! -[cell phone clicks.]
No! That's not funny.
That's a serious word! You're not trapped.
You can fart yourselves free.
Just put your cheeks together and blow! [farting.]
[narrator.]
span style="style1"/The bloated residents of Piqua Ha-ha! farted their way back to normal.
Fart army, if the humans will not obey, make them fartsplode.
[all gasp.]
We gotta round up all these fart guys before we all explode.
-But how can we contain them? -Ooh, can I get one of these? Please! [clamoring.]
And stay in there.
[groans.]
I'll never get this taste out of my mouth! [narrator.]
He won't.
No! You've made a mockery of all things fart! The balloons, the noises, the jokes.
But I am not a joke.
I am a fart.
Alive and proud.
I want to be celebrated, not ridiculed.
Admired, not mocked.
Is it too much to ask that instead of being laughed at, I am liked? Actually, you're getting lots of likes.
What's this? Likes, you say? I am liked? They respect me.
From this day forward, humans and farts can live together, in peace.
[all cheering.]
As long as I continue to get theoretical admiration from strangers.
Aw.
Well, that was easy.
Okay, now we just need to Wait, wait, where is the? Rule book? After I was left behind in the tunnel, I went back.
So many snakes! To retrieve the rule book you forgot.
No big deal.
I'm fine.
-Wow! Thanks.
-Yeah, we make a great team.
Just get rid of Krupp.
-[mower engine running.]
-So when does the magic show start? [grunts.]
I'm naked and outside! Again! [screams.]
Can't believe we're getting rid of Krupp tomorrow.
Yeah.
[sighs.]
Hmm.
-Unless we don't get rid of him.
-What? If we get expelled, we've still got each other.
But being principal is all Mr.
Krupp's got.
-We gotta give the book back to Krupp.
-That'll be visit 500.
Yep.
[school bell ringing.]
-[door opening.]
-Huh? -[door closing.]
-George and Harold? [dings.]
[yells, laughs.]
-Whoo! Hee-hoo! -[glass shatters.]
[narrator.]
Krupp danced as if he'd practiced for this every night.
Because he had.
Yes! A whoop-whoop, whoop-whoop-whoop! Jaba-daba-ding-dong! [laughs.]
Yes! I've imagined this moment a thousand times, and now that it's here, it's even sweeter than I imagined! Imagine that! Oh, I just did! [laughs.]
[inhales deeply, blows.]
What? My rule book? -How did you get this? -It doesn't matter.
We were going to give it to Dr.
Vil Endenemys to get you fired before you could expel us but that felt like a mean thing.
And we thought, we're not like that.
We're not like -[whimpers.]
Me? -Yeah, you.
So we're giving it back to you instead.
We were wrong and we accept our fate.
And sorry.
We apologize.
What? Huh.
No.
[groans.]
No, no, no, no, no! You can't do this to me.
Not now.
I was so close.
But then you were nice! You even apologized! Now I can't expel you! I can't believe this is happening! Why did you give me my book? Wait, this isn't the rule book.
It's a cookbook.
-A cookbook! -[Melvin.]
That's right.
My mother's cookbook.
I switched the books! I couldn't trust you to do the right thing, with your bleeding hearts and miniscule minds.
-So I gave the real book to him.
-[Harold and George.]
Dr.
Vil Endenemys! -The school superintendent! -How long have you been there? That's right.
That is who I am.
And Mr.
Krupp, for crimes against academia and humanity, but mainly for scribbling rules in the rulebook, I pronounce you fired! George Beard and Harold Hutchins, for a history of behavior so disruptive, it can no longer be tolerated within these walls, I hereby pronounce you expelled! -But -Wait, I'm not done.
You see, my real name is not Vil Endenemys.
I hear you boys like rearranging signs, so rearrange the letters to find my true identity.
-Do we have to? -Can't you just tell us? No, you're ruining it! "Smelly Dive"? Really? Does that sound like a name? "Evil Enemy.
" You're getting closer.
Now try an actual name.
-Aah -Wait, I think I got it.
I see it.
But [both.]
"Melvin Sneedly"? I? You? Me? You what? That's right.
I am Melvin Sneedly from the future.
-Oh, and I'm a cyborg.
-[George gasps.]
I've come back to right the wrongs of my past, and I start by getting rid of all of you.
-What? -Not you, Melvin.
For I am future Melvin Sneedly, and you three are gone! [Melvins laughing.]