The Fairly OddParents (2001) s01e03 Episode Script

Spaced Out

1 the U.
S.
Department of Education and Nickelodeon Puny humans! We shall now suck out your brains with bendy straws! [gasps.]
You can suck out our minds, livers, and spleens, but we will never surrender.
Silence, captain laser pants.
No one can save you now.
It's Crash Nebula! Hurrah! Intergalactic scum, your reign of terror ends Now! TV: Crash Nebula Crash Nebula, space hero, is on his way It's pretty cool, huh, Chester? Yeah.
Don't you think, A.
J.
? Positively.
TV narrator: Will Crash Nebula escape the evil clutches of the clutchulax? Tune in next week for another exciting episode of Crash Nebula! That was the best episode ever.
Right guys? Guys? Get him! Meddling humans! You'll never catch me.
[sniff sniff.]
I smell fun.
Two against one, huh? Mother ship! Come in, mother ship! This is Timmy calling Cosmo and Wanda.
Do you read? Aye, aye, captain Timmy, sir.
Uh, he said, "mother ship.
" that means I'm in charge.
Awaiting orders, your space macho-ness.
I need more firepower.
You've got it, kiddo.
More firepower, lackey.
I want a father ship next time.
Cool! Killer crash suit, dude.
Yes.
Wherever did you get it? Internet.
Cool.
Now all we need is an alien and we can reenact episode 621 of Crash Nebula.
[whispering.]
I wish we had an alien monster to play with.
Great job on the alien, guys.
It's so lifelike.
Of course it is.
He's real.
We're not so good at creating aliens.
Yeah.
So we borrowed one.
What! Queen Jipjurrulec, you seem troubled.
Yes, King Grippulon.
Our son hasn't tortured the prisoners yet today.
Hmm.
That's not like Mark.
Computer, find Mark.
Uh, readings show that your son has been taken to Earth.
[crying.]
Oh, not Earth! Assemble the star destroyers.
We'll blow up that foul planet and get our son back.
Uh, not necessarily in that order.
[screaming.]
Amazing.
A fully automated, automatonic space alien! Puny humans! What's up? I'm going to suck your brains through these bendy straws.
Cool.
Actual Crash Nebula dialog.
You Earth children are not afraid of me? Or my straws? [sniff sniff.]
Hey! Authentic alien bad breath.
I'm telling you for the last time [shouting.]
Keep it quiet up here! She's terrified the children in a way I could not.
You in the stupid alien costume, you're out of here! But Vicky-- You can play with your geek buddy after you clean up this room! Ooh, she's so Forceful! Queen: You wouldn't have to blow up all these planets if you'd just stop for directions.
Quiet! I'm still the King around here.
King of getting lost.
Silence! Psst! Timmy.
What is it? Uh, we have good news and bad news.
What's the good news? The alien we got you is actually a prince from the dreaded war planet Yugopatamia.
And his parents are on their way to destroy the Earth and rescue their son.
What's the bad news? Oh, wait.
That was the bad news.
Then what's the good news? I found a nickel.
OK, then I wish the alien was back home.
Well? Is he gone? Uh More good news, nickel boy? My nickel! It seems our alien prince has fallen in love with Vicky, and the rules say we can't interfere with true love.
We've got to talk the alien out of loving Vicky.
Dude, are you talKing to your fish? Yes-- uh, guys, we need to get the alien away from Vicky.
It's, uh, a collectable.
Superlative.
Hmm.
So why would she take it? She's not even a fan.
She'll probably sell it to buy makeup and other girl stuff.
Let's go.
Vicky: You know, I could sell your stupid costume for makeup and other girl stuff.
Vicky, the fear you instilled in the young ones was enchanting.
Hmm, you talk funny.
Are you from Europe or something? I'm a warrior prince from Yugopatamia.
My name is Mark.
Yech! You're a foreign exchange student.
Take off that stupid costume.
Does this form not please you? [sighs.]
LoOK, if you want to please me so much, why don't you make me a chocolate shake? Chocolate! That's like the foulest substance known on my planet! Ah ha! You rock! Alien toy, we're here to save you from Vicky.
I do not wish to be saved from Vicky.
Vicky's the foulest, most evil creature in the universe.
I know.
Isn't she awesome? You two will make excellent appetizers for Vicky.
Cool.
This is just like what happened in today's Crash Nebula episode.
Timmy: Yech.
How can anyone fall in love with her? Uh, Timmy, there's something we've got to show you.
Wanda: Seems like we have less time than we thought.
Oh, no.
I'd better go talk to the alien's parents.
Maybe they can talk some sense into their son.
Good idea.
We can't destroy true love.
But parents can.
Halt! Who goes there? Cosmo, Wanda, and Timmy of Earth.
We need to speak with Mark's parents.
If the King and Queen you wish to see, then you must face the perils three.
Now, puny human, you must skip across the dreaded Field of flowers.
They're beautiful.
I mean, gasp! Well, here goes nothing.
Really.
Amazing.
The flowers touch his skin, but he neither bleeds nor burns.
Ta da.
[gasps.]
Behold the second task.
You must hug the galaxy's cutest and softest teddy bear.
[gasps.]
You can do it, Timmy.
The fate of the Earth depends on it.
Oh, all right.
Teddy: I love you.
[screaming.]
We don't understand! He didn't burst into flames.
Never fear, my Queen.
Not even our mightiest warriors can survive the final test.
Is that? It can't be.
It is.
Chocolate.
Not so high and mighty now, are you, Earth punk? For your last task, you must eat the chocolate bar.
Sure.
I mean, not chocolate! Anything but that! Please don't make me eat it! Hey! There's peanuts in it! [screaming.]
You are truly the foulest creature in the universe.
You may speak to the King and Queen.
A mere child has passed our toughest test.
Your kind are very powerful indeed.
Oh, please don't hurt us.
We just want our son back.
I, Timmy, candy crunching warrior of Earth, have good news and bad news.
The good news is I've named my nickel Philip.
What's the bad news? It's a girl nickel! There's a problem with an Earth girl.
He's fallen in love with her.
I and my race of flower skipping, bear hugging chocolate eating warriors will not stand for this.
We-we'll talk to Mark.
We'll set things straight.
Just don't eat the chocolate again! [screams.]
Mark: OK, dudes.
Things aren't going well with Vicky, so I've decided to suck out your brains and give them to her as gifts.
You can suck out our minds, livers, and spleens, but we will never surrender.
Silence puny Earth children! No one can save you now.
Tim Nebula! Intergalactic scum! Your reign of terror ends now.
Excellent.
Another brain I can give to Vicky.
[door bell ringing.]
Oh, what now? Hello.
We're Mr.
and Mrs Chang, and we've come to pick up our son Mark.
Vicky: Mark? Get out here! My beloved calls me.
I'll be back to suck your brains out in a moment.
Later.
Mother, father.
What are you doing here? Mark, enough of this foolishness.
It's time to go, pal.
I cannot go with you, for I am in love with Vicky.
You see, she taught me something today.
It does not matter how hideous you are on the outside but how evil and vicious you are on the inside.
Right? Am I right? Well, if you're in love-- Uh, no, son.
It would never work.
She's not where we're from.
You mean Europe? OK.
Mark, listen to your father and go back to the ship--I mean, car.
Whatever.
I'll never forget you, Mark, for an exchange student from Yugo Europe.
Hey! I found a nickel.
Philip! Timmy, that was the best game of Crash Nebula ever.
Dude, you rock.
Thanks, guys.
Narrator: Will Timmy's secret ever be exposed? Will Cosmo and philip the nickel ever be reunited? Tune in next week for another exciting episode of The Fairly OddParents.
Cool! the U.
S.
Department of Education and Nickelodeon Captioned by the National Captioning Institute