The Fall Guy (1981) s01e16 Episode Script

The Snow Job

WELL, I'M NOT THE KIND TO KISS AND TELL BUT I'VE BEEN SEEN WITH FARRAH I'VE NEVER BEEN WITH ANYTHING LESS THAN A NINE SO FINE I'VE BEEN ON FIRE WITH SALLY FIELD GONE FAS WITH A GIRL NAMED BO BUT SOMEHOW THEY JUS DON'T END UP AS MINE IT'S A DEATH-DEFYIN' LIFE I LEAD I TAKE MY CHANCES I DIE FOR A LIVIN' IN THE MOVIES AND TV [ Siren Wailing .]
BUT THE HARDEST THING I EVER DO IS WATCH MY LEADING LADIES KISS SOME OTHER GUY WHILE I'M BANDAGIN' MY KNEE I MIGHT FALL FROM A TALL BUILDIN' I MIGHT ROLL A BRAND-NEW CAR 'CAUSE I'M THE UNKNOWN STUNTMAN THAT MADE REDFORD SUCH A STAR [ Women Vocalizing .]
I'VE NEVER SPEN MUCH TIME IN SCHOOL BUT I'VE TAUGH LADIES PLENTY IT'S TRUE I HIRE MY BODY OUT FOR PAY HEY, HEY I'VE GOTTEN BURNED OVER CHERYL TIEGS BLOWN UP FOR RAQUEL WELCH BUT WHEN I WIND UP IN THE HAY, IT'S ONLY HAY HEY, HEY I MIGHT JUMP AN OPEN DRAWBRIDGE OR TARZAN FROM A VINE 'CAUSE I'M THE UNKNOWN STUNTMAN THAT MAKES EASTWOOD LOOK SO FINE [ Colt Narrating .]
THIS IS THE STORY OF ONE OF AMERICA'S GREAT UNSUNG HEROES.
I MEAN, YOU'VE SEEN HIM, BUT YOU NEVER KNEW WHO HE WAS.
YOU'VE CHEERED FOR HIM AND CRIED FOR HIM, WOMEN HAVE WANTED TO DIE FOR HIM.
BUT DID HE EVER GET ANY CREDIT? OR THE GIRL? NO.
HE WAS WHAT WE CALL A STUNTMAN.
AND THE REASON I'M TALKIN' SO FONDLY ABOUT HIM IS-- WELL, BECAUSE IT'S ME, COLT SEAVERS.
ANYWAY, PICTURE WORK ISN'T WALL-TO-WALL EMPLOYMENT.
SO MAYBE YOU WONDER HOW A GUY KEEPS HIS HEAD TOGETHER.
WELL, ONE WAY IS TO WAIT BY THE PHONE AND WAIT AND WAIT.
THE OTHER IS TO TAKE AN OCCASIONAL JOB FOR THE COURT SYSTEM OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, WHERE A MAN IS CONSIDERED INNOCEN UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY.
UNFORTUNATELY, SOMETIMES A LO OF THESE PEOPLE GET OUT OF JAIL ON WHAT WE CALL BAIL.
AND THEY RUN LIKE HELL.
THAT'S WHERE I COME IN.
I SOMETIMES PICK UP RENT MONEY TRYIN' TO FIND THEM AND BRING THEM BACK TO JUSTICE.
BUT RIGHT NOW, I'M IN ASPEN, COLORADO, TRYIN' TO FI FOUR DAYS OF STUNT WORK AND FIVE DAYS OF SKIING INTO A SEVEN-DAY WEEK.
[ Woman Giggling, Laughing .]
[ Giggling, Laughing Continue .]
[ Man .]
ROBIN! GET OUT OF HERE! ROBIN! COME BACK HERE! [ Gasps .]
GET OUT OF MY WAY, ANDY.
THE MAN'S CALLING FOR YOU.
ANDY, PLEASE.
COME ON, ROBIN.
WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT.
COME ON, MRS.
STEVENS.
TALK'S GOOD.
YOU'LL FEEL BETTER.
THANKS, ANDY.
I'LL JOIN YOU LATER.
OKAY.
GET OUT OF MY WAY.
GET OVER THERE.
ROBIN, DON'T BE STUPID.
ROBIN, PLEASE LISTEN TO HIM.
[ Scoffs .]
YOU LISTEN TO HIM, HONEY.
I ALREADY TRIED THAT, AND LOOK WHERE IT GOT ME.
JORDAN, IF YOU EVER TRY TO COME AFTER ME, I'LL TELL THE WHOLE WORLD ABOUT YOU.
I'LL TELL 'EM EVERYTHING, AND I MEAN EVERYTHING.
NO! MR.
STEVENS! [ Groans .]
- MR.
STEVENS! YOU ALL RIGHT? - YES.
GET HER! SHE HAS TO BE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE.
TRY THE GARAGE WHILE I GET DRESSED.
[ Jody .]
HURRY UP.
LET'S GE THOSE DECALS ON THE CAR.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M ACTUALLY WORKIN' WITH COLT SEAVERS, EVEN IF IT IS ONLY A COMMERCIAL.
HEY, A STUNT'S JUST A STUNT.
IT DON'T KNOW IF IT'S IN A COMMERCIAL OR STAR WARS.
"A STUNT'S JUST A STUNT.
" THAT'S JUST THE WAY YOU SAID IT IN THAT ARTICLE YOU DID WITH AMERICAN FILM.
YOU SAID THAT? I HAD TO SAY SOMETHIN'.
I HAVE THE MAGAZINE BACK AT THE LODGE.
I'LL MAKE YOU A COPY.
OH, GREAT.
- COLT, THEY'RE ALMOS READY FOR YOU.
- OKAY.
BE RIGHT THERE.
WHO, UH-- WHO WAS THAT LITTLE SNOW BUNNY? THAT'S NO SNOW BUNNY.
THAT WAS MY ASSISTANT-- JODY BANKS.
ASSISTANT? [ Chortles .]
WHAT I HEARD IN FILM SCHOOL'S TRUE.
THE STUNTMEN ARE THE ONES WHO REALLY GET THE GIRLS.
- SHE REALLY WAS MY ASSISTANT.
- I THOUGHT HOWIE WAS YOUR ASSISTANT.
HOWIE'S MY COUSIN AND MY ASSISTANT.
TWO ASSISTANTS? THAT'S PRACTICALLY AN ENTOURAGE.
AND YOU'RE JUST A STUNTMAN.
JOSH, YOU'RE GONNA LOVE HOLLYWOOD.
[ Chuckles .]
[ People Cheering .]
[ Josh .]
LET'S DO IT.
COLT SEAVERS? WHEN YOU STAR PICKIN' UP SPEED, STOMP ON THAT PEDAL.
I WANT THIS BABY TO REALLY FLY.
WELL, MAYBE WE SHOULD'VE PUT SOME WINGS ON IT.
LIKE IN THAT BOND MOVIE.
I SAW IT AT FILMEX.
JOSH, CAN WE DO THIS? I'M GETTIN' COLD.
NEXT TIME, WE'LL DO IT WITH THE WINGS.
OKAY, NOW REMEMBER, DON'T FIGHT IT.
HAVE FUN.
[ Engine Starts, Revs .]
ALL RIGHT.
THIS WILL BE PICTURE.
[ Engine Revving .]
YOU READY? AND GO FOR IT! [ Loud Thud .]
HE DID IT! BEAUTIFUL.
GORGEOUS! CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S GET DOWN THERE.
[ People Cheering, Applauding .]
OH, UH, JODY? WOULD YOU LIKE A RIDE? [ Horn Honking .]
HI.
HI.
UM-- UH, EXCUSE ME.
UH, ARE YOU GOING BACK TO ASPEN NOW? NO.
WE'RE GOING DOWN TO THE POS OF THE SKI JUMP.
THAT'S CLOSE ENOUGH.
CAN I GET A RIDE WITH YOU? SURE.
JUMP IN.
THANK YOU.
DID YOU GET IT? HOW COULD YOU MISS IT? CALIFORNIA PLATE-- "FALL GUY.
" I DON'T THINK HE'LL BE HARD TO FIND.
LET'S GO.
[ Background: Country Rock .]
SHE RODE ALL THE WAY DOWN THE HILL WITH YOU, AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN GET HER NAME? SHE WASN'T VERY TALKATIVE.
AND SHE KEPT LOOKIN' OUT THE BACK WINDOW, LIKE SOMEBODY WAS FOLLOWING HER.
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT? I'M READY TO CLIMB INTO A NICE HOT TUB.
WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO ALSO CLIMBING INTO A NICE HOT TODDY? I'D SAY THE TWO ARE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER.
MISS, CAN I HAVE A HOT TODDY AND A HOT CHOCOLATE? MAYBE WE OUGHTA ASK 'EM OVER, HUH? [ Both Chuckling .]
GUESS THEY'RE DOIN' OKAY.
COLT, WHAT AM I DOIN' WRONG? I MEAN, I'M A MACHO GUY, RIGHT? I'M A STUNTMAN.
- AND I'M BY MYSELF.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY YOURSELF? - YOU AIN'T ALONE.
YOU'RE WITH ME.
- HEY, IT'S FRIDAY NIGHT.
WE'RE IN THE SNOW BUNNY CAPITAL OF THE UNIVERSE.
DID YOU SEE THE SELECTION AT THE BAR LAST NIGHT? - MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE IN THE BAR.
- TRUST ME.
NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN IN THE BAR UNTIL AFTER 10:00.
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MY HAT? I GOT THIS FOR THE TRIP TO ASPEN.
MAYBE I SHOULD'VE GOTTEN THE WHITE ONE.
[ Jody .]
COLT.
HOWIE.
HI, GUYS.
HI.
HOWIE, I LOVE YOUR HAT.
YOU WANNA TRY THE BAR, COLT? HEY, YOU SAID NOTHIN' HAPPENS IN THE BAR TILL 10:00.
BESIDES, I GOT A DATE FOR DINNER.
HEY, GIRLS, OVER HERE.
COME ON DOWN.
HOWIE, JOSH, JODY, I'D LIKE YOU TO MEE BAMBI AND THUMPER.
HI.
HI.
HOW ARE YOU? - UH, BAMBI AND THUMPER? - MM-HMM.
- COLT, WE'RE GONNA GO UP TO OUR ROOM AND CHANGE NOW.
- WONDERFUL.
OKAY.
BYE.
BYE.
BYE.
TWO OF NATURE'S LOVELIEST CREATURES.
WHERE'D YOU FIND 'EM, COLT? IN THE BAR-- 'BOUT 6:00.
[ Laughing .]
YOU DON'T REALLY HAVE TO CHANGE.
RIGHT.
YOU'RE FINE WITH US JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.
IT'LL JUST TAKE A SECOND.
IF I WENT OUT LIKE THIS, I'D PROBABLY COME BACK FROZEN STIFF, HAVE ICICLES HANGING ALL OVER MY-- HAT.
WELL, WE'LL WARM YOU UP.
I'LL BET YOU WOULD.
COME ON IN, LADIES.
MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME.
[ Door Closes .]
ROBIN.
HELLO, COLT.
HEY, WHAT IS THIS? TELL YOU THE TRUTH, I DON'T KNOW MYSELF.
I'LL BET YOU DON'T.
LET'S GET OUTTA HERE.
W-WAIT.
GIRLS.
JUST WAIT-- WAIT.
WAIT A MINUTE.
SHE'S JUST AN OLD FRIEND.
WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' HERE? I'M SORRY.
WHERE'S YOUR HUSBAND, THE CONGRESSMAN? - THAT'S FINISHED.
- WHAT'S THA SUPPOSED TO MEAN? I DISCOVERED HIM WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
[ Sighs .]
I EVEN TOOK PICTURES OF THEM.
I WAS GONNA LEAVE HIM ANYWAY.
HE TRIED TO STOP ME, AND I SHOT HIM.
SHOT HIM? [ Crying .]
COLT.
WAIT JUST A MINUTE.
NOW, WHERE DID YOU SHOOT HIM? [ Sighs .]
IN THE LEG.
IT WAS SELF-DEFENSE.
HE TRIED TO SHOOT ME FIRST.
DID YOU REPORT THIS TO THE SHERIFF? NO.
THERE WERE OTHER PEOPLE THERE.
AND THEY'LL ALL LIE FOR HIM.
YEAH, BUT STILL-- [ Knocking .]
WHO IS IT? [ Man .]
ROOM SERVICE.
ROOM SERVICE? STAY THERE.
ROOM-- DID YOU ORDER ANY ROOM SERVICE? NO.
I THINK YOU'VE GO THE WRONG ROOM, PAL.
[ Groans .]
[ Man .]
GOOD EVENING, SLICK.
WE DECIDE WHEN YOU NEED IT.
ROOM SERVICE WORKS A LITTLE DIFFERENT AROUND HERE.
WE DON'T TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER.
NOW YOU SAW WHAT HAPPENED TO JORDAN.
LISTEN, ROBIN, YOU'RE NEVER GONNA GET OFF THIS MOUNTAIN.
SO WHY DON'T YOU JUS GIVE ME THE PHOTOGRAPHS, AND WE CAN FORGET THIS LITTLE MISUNDERSTANDING? NO.
THOSE PHOTOGRAPHS ARE THE ONLY THINGS THAT ARE KEEPING ME ALIVE.
AND THIS GUN.
NOW JUST BACK YOURSELVES OUTTA MY WAY.
GO ON.
[ Grunts .]
MMM.
I WONDER HOW COLT'S DOIN'? JODY, DON'T DO THAT TO ME.
COLT'S UP THERE HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE.
BOY, YOU'RE EVEN DUMBER THAN YOU LOOK.
[ Groans .]
BYE-BYE.
WHAT AN ENTRANCE! WHAT A STUNT! [ Howie .]
SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE ELEVATOR, COLT? THANK YOU, FELLAS.
OOPS.
HAND ME THOSE BOOTS, JODY.
FROM THE WAY YOU DESCRIBED HER, SHE'S DEFINITELY THE GIRL I DROVE DOWN THE HILL.
YEAH.
WELL, WHEN I KNEW HER, HER NAME WAS ROBIN WILSON.
SHE WASN'T MUCH OF AN ACTRESS, BUT AS A PERSON SHE WAS SOMETHIN' KIND OF SPECIAL.
IF THINGS HAD GONE A LITTLE DIFFERENT, YOU NEVER KNOW.
- WHAT HAPPENED? - SHE GOT A BETTER OFFER-- JORDAN STEVENS.
ISN'T HE A STATE SENATOR OR CONGRESSMAN OR SOMETHING? YEAH.
CONGRESSMAN.
ROBIN GREW UP IN A LITTLE TOWN CLOSE BY HERE CALLED ROCK CREEK.
CAME HOME FOR CHRISTMAS, MET STEVENS AT A PARTY.
SIX MONTHS LATER, THEY WERE MARRIED.
- HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN SINCE YOU'VE SEEN HER? - UH, FIVE YEARS.
FIVE YEARS.
I'D SAY YOU'RE LUCKY SHE STAYED AWAY THAT LONG.
[ Phone Ringing .]
YEAH.
I'LL GET IT.
YEAH, HELLO.
[ Big Jack .]
HI, COLT.
IT'S ME-- JACK.
IT'S BIG JACK.
YEAH, IT'S ME.
WHAT'D YOU FIND OUT? WELL, I TALKED TO A FRIEND THAT WORKS FOR THE SECURITY COMPANY THAT PROTECTS CONGRESSMAN STEVENS.
AND GET THIS ONE.
ACCORDING TO HIM, STEVENS SHOT HIMSELF WHILE CLEANING A GUN.
THEY'RE TRYING TO COVER IT UP.
THE ASPEN SHERIFF'S DEPARTMEN HADN'T BEEN CALLED EITHER.
WHAT ELSE DID YOUR FRIEND HAVE TO SAY? WELL, JUST THA STEVENS AND HIS WIFE WERE AS HAPPY AS ONE COULD EXPECT.
- WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? - STEVENS KNOWS MORE GIRLS THAN HUGH HEFNER.
ROBIN COULD CAUSE HIM A LO MORE TROUBLE BY DIVORCING HIM THAN BY SHOOTING HIM, BECAUSE HE IS A SHOO-IN FOR THE NEXT GOVERNOR OF HIS HOME STATE.
SHOOTING HIM MAKES NO SENSE AT ALL UNLESS IT WAS REALLY SELF-DEFENSE.
- THAT'S JUST HOW I WAS READING IT, COLT.
- WHAT ABOUT THAT ADDRESS? - I KNOW HE'S GOT A HOME SOMEWHERE HERE IN ASPEN.
- OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
- DEEP CANYON ROAD.
- WHAT'S THE NUMBER? THAT IS THE NUMBER.
HE OWNS THE WHOLE CANYON.
OH.
THANKS, BIG JACK.
BE TALKING TO YOU.
[ Handset Settles In Cradle .]
WELL, POLITICS SURE PAYS BETTER THAN STUNT WORK.
COLT, I'VE BEEN THINKING.
SINCE YOU HAVEN'T HEARD FROM ROBIN AND SINCE THE SHERIFF DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT A SHOOTING, MAYBE THOSE TWO GOONS CAUGHT UP WITH ROBIN AFTER ALL.
IF THEY WERE STEVENS'S MEN, THEY WOULD HAVE TAKEN HER BACK TO HIS HOUSE.
WHICH IS EXACTLY WHERE WE'RE GOING FIRST THING IN THE MORNING.
[ Background: Soft Rock .]
[ Continues .]
[ Chattering .]
AH, REUBEN.
HAVING A GOOD TIME? I'M HERE, AREN'T I? [ Chuckling .]
I GUESS THAT'S YOUR ULTIMATE COMPLIMENT.
HOW'S OUR BUSINESS COMING ALONG? - RIGHT ON SCHEDULE.
- I'M COUNTING ON YOU, JORDAN.
- I WON'T LET YOU DOWN.
- I HOPE YOU DON'T.
OH, UH, EXCUSE ME.
LOOK WHO'S HERE.
[ Jordan .]
SO THAT'S HER STUNTMAN.
MAY I HELP YOU? I THINK CONGRESSMAN STEVENS IS EXPECTING US.
[ Andy .]
I THINK YOU MIGH JUST BE RIGHT.
HAVE A GOOD TIME, GENTLEMEN.
THANK YOU.
BRING HIM IN HERE.
NO WONDER THERE WEREN'T ANY SKI BUNNIES AT THE LODGE.
THEY'RE ALL RIGHT HERE.
YEAH.
WHY DON'T YOU MIX? GET A FEEL OF THE PLACE.
YEAH.
I WAS THINKIN' THE SAME THING.
I HAD A FEELIN' YOU'D BE AROUND HERE SOMEPLACE.
WELL, YOUR FEELING WAS RIGHT.
MR.
STEVENS WOULD LIKE TO SEE YOU.
WORKS OUT WELL.
I WANT TO SEE HIM TOO.
R-A-D-I-S-H? C-H.
I KNOW.
IT'S A LOUSY NAME FOR AN EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT, ISN'T IT? NO.
I THINK IT'S KIND OF HONEST.
HOW LONG HAVE YOU WORKED FOR THE CONGRESSMAN? EIGHTEEN MONTHS.
EIGHTEEN MONTHS.
YOU MUST KNOW HIS WIFE THEN.
NO.
I WORK OU OF OUR CAPITOL OFFICE.
I ONLY ARRIVED IN ASPEN YESTERDAY.
[ Chuckles .]
I'M SORRY.
I WAS JUST THINKING THAT MY WIFE IS A WOMAN OF UNIVERSAL TASTE.
LOOK, STEVENS, I'M NOT MUCH FOR SMALL TALK.
LET'S GET DOWN TO IT, HUH? ALL RIGHT.
I HAVE TO FIND MY WIFE BEFORE SHE FINDS ME.
SHE'S NOT EXACTLY RATIONAL AT THE MOMENT.
I THINK YOU ALREADY FOUND HER.
YES, I FOUND HER-- HIDING IN YOUR ROOM.
UNFORTUNATELY, YOU WERE EASIER TO HANDLE THAN MY WIFE.
AND NOW YOU'RE SCARED TO DEATH SHE'S GONNA SHOOT YOU AGAIN.
COME TO THINK OF IT, WHY DID SHE SHOOT YOU? SHE BECAME OBSESSED WITH THE NOTION THAT I WAS INTERESTED IN ONE OF MY ASSISTANTS.
UH, AS A MATTER OF FACT, THAT'S MY ASSISTAN RIGHT THERE, TALKING TO YOUR YOUNG FRIEND.
- HER NAME IS WENDY RADICH.
- [ Clicks .]
HAVE YOU EVER TRIED LIFT 7? NO, BUT IT SOUNDS LUCKY.
YOU NEVER KNOW.
THEY'VE BEEN BLASTING UP THERE EVERY MORNING.
THIS IS AVALANCHE COUNTRY.
YOU WILLING TO RISK IT? SURE.
WHY NOT? THAT'S HOW I GOT WHERE I AM-- BY PUTTING IT ON THE LINE.
AVALANCHE COUNTRY.
AVALANCHE COUNTRY, HERE WE COME.
- [ Audio Stops .]
- NOT MUCH PRIVACY AROUND HERE.
I'VE GOT THIS THING ABOUT SECRETS.
YEAH.
YOU DON'T WAN ANYBODY ELSE TO HAVE ANY.
[ Chuckling .]
NOW LOOK, LOOK.
I'VE GOT AN IDEA.
WE BOTH WAN TO FIND ROBIN, RIGHT? WHY DON'T WE JOIN FORCES? [ Scoffs .]
YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING.
$5,000 A DAY PLUS EXPENSES.
DOES THAT SOUND LIKE I'M KIDDING? PUT A SIGN IN THE WINDOW.
PUT A STACK OF MONEY NEXT TO IT.
SHE'S VERY DANGEROUS.
$5,000 A DAY DOESN'T GO VERY FAR WHEN YOU'RE DEAD.
YOU GOT A POINT AND A NEW EMPLOYEE.
AND ONE CONDITION.
WHAT? SLADE GOES WITH YOU.
YOU CAN KEEP YOUR MONEY.
NOW, IF HE'S NOT WITH YOU, HE'LL BE RIGHT BEHIND YOU.
YOU GOT ANOTHER POINT AND A DEAL.
COME ON, SLADE.
[ Remote Clicks .]
I'VE BEEN THINKIN' ABOU GOIN' INTO POLITICS, TOO, BUT IT COSTS SO DOGGONE MUCH MONEY THESE DAYS.
WHAT KIND OF FUND-RAISING TECHNIQUES DOES THE CONGRESSMAN USE? [ Wendy .]
I DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT THAT PART OF IT.
UH, THERE'S MY PARTNER.
I'VE GOTTA GO.
TOP OF LIFT 7 AT 4:00.
OKAY? GREAT.
I'LL BE THERE.
SEE YOU THEN.
I DON'T WANNA SAY ANYTHING, BUT I THINK WE'RE BEING FOLLOWED BY A MOUNTAIN.
THAT'S JUST SLADE-- SPECIAL AIDE TO THE CONGRESSMAN.
HE'S GONNA HELP US LOOK FOR THAT DANGEROUS WOMAN, ROBIN STEVENS.
WHAT? IN THE BACK, SLADE.
IN THE BACK? - LIKE THE MAN SAID, YOU'D BE RIGHT BEHIND ME.
- NOW LISTEN, SEAVERS-- BESIDES, YOU CAN COVER OUR REAR IN CASE ROBIN TRIES TO ATTACK FROM BEHIND.
TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT.
GET IN THE BACK, OR YOU DON'T GO.
I MIGHT HAVE US A LEAD, BUT SHE'S NOT GONNA BE VERY TALKATIVE IF SHE SEES US HANGING OU WITH THIS GUY SLADE.
WELL, STEVENS CLAIMS THE GIRL YOU WERE TALKING TO WAS THE REASON ROBIN SHOT HIM.
HOW DOES HE KNOW WHAT GIRL I WAS TALKING TO? STEVENS HAD YOU ON CLOSED-CIRCUI TELEVISION, WITH SOUND.
OH, TERRIFIC.
YOU MEET WENDY LIKE YOU PLANNED, AND I'LL KEEP SLADE OUT OF THE WAY.
[ Background: Soft Rock .]
THANK YOU, DARLIN'.
PUT THIS ON HOWIE MUNSON'S ROOM BILL, HUH? AH.
JACUZZI FOR THE OUTSIDE, THEN A LITTLE OF THIS COGNAC FOR THE INSIDE.
MAYBE I WAS WRONG ABOUT YOU, SEAVERS.
OH, THIS IS NO THE ONLY SURPRISE I HAVE FOR YOU, DEL.
PEACE? WELL, TRUCE ANYWAY, HUH? - AH, LADIES.
- HI, COLT.
- HOW ARE YOU? - FRIENDS OF YOURS? - FRIENDS OF OURS.
LADIES, LADIES.
COME ON DOWN.
OH, THANK YOU.
[ Giggling .]
UH, DEL SLADE, THIS IS, UH, THUMPER.
HI.
AND THIS IS, UH, BAMBI HERE.
HI.
- HERE YOU GO.
- WHAT WOULD YOU LADIES LIKE TO HAVE TO DRINK? OH, ANYTHING-- AS LONG AS IT'S NATURAL.
[ Laughs .]
- [ Gunshot .]
- [ Explosion .]
- WHAT WAS THAT? IT'S AN AVALANCHE! [ Screams .]
HOWIE! [ Siren Wailing .]
[ Man On Radio .]
ASPEN, THIS IS PARAMEDIC UNIT 3-NINER.
THE GUY'S IN GOOD SHAPE, AND HE LED US TO THE GIRL.
WE'RE COMING IN WITH HER NOW.
[ Man .]
YOUNG LADY'S VERY LUCKY.
SHE'S GONNA BE A LITTLE SORE FOR A FEW DAYS, BUT OTHERWISE SHE'S FINE.
CAN I SEE HER? FOR A MINUTE.
- WHAT'S THE MATTER, SLADE? - OH, NOTHING.
I THINK I'LL CALL THE CONGRESSMAN.
- HE'LL WANT TO KNOW WENDY'S OKAY.
- I'M SURE HE WILL.
THANK YOU.
SURE.
HOW ARE YOU FEELING? ALIVE, THANKS TO YOU.
I WAS PRETTY WORRIED ABOUT YOU THERE FOR A WHILE.
[ Knocks .]
WENDY, THIS IS MY PARTNER, COLT SEAVERS.
HI.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
YOU TWO WERE PRETTY LUCKY, HUH? LUCKY ISN'T THE WORD FOR IT.
THE AVALANCHE WASN'T AN ACCIDENT.
IT WASN'T? HOWIE, DO YOU REMEMBER HEARING A LOUD CRACK AND EXPLOSION RIGHT BEFORE THE AVALANCHE? YEAH.
NOW THA YOU MENTION IT, I DID HEAR ONE.
THAT WAS A SHO TO SET OFF THE DYNAMITE.
DYNAMITE? DO YOU THINK THE SKI PATROL DID IT? IT WAS JORDAN.
HE WAS TRYING TO KILL ME.
[ Howie .]
WHY? BECAUSE HE WAS AFRAID YOU'D TELL HOWIE SOMETHING ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN HIM AND ROBIN.
YOU WERE THE ONE THA SHE FOUND WITH STEVENS, WEREN'T YOU? YES, BUT THAT WAS JUST THE FINAL STRAW.
HE'S NEVER BEEN FAITHFUL TO HER.
BUT THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE, SOMETHING REALLY BIG.
- ONLY ROBIN KNOWS WHAT IT IS.
- STEVENS THINKS YOU KNOW.
THAT'S WHAT HE WAS AFRAID YOU'D TELL HOWIE.
THEN ROBIN'S IN MORE DANGER THAN WE THOUGHT.
WE'VE GOTTA FIND HER.
I GOT A FEW IDEAS ON WHERE SHE MIGHT BE, BUT-- GREAT, BUT WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO ABOUT THIS GUY SLADE? WE'VE GOTTA GET RID OF HIM.
WOULD YOU RING JODY BANKS'S ROOM, PLEASE? [ Phone Ringing .]
HELLO.
JODY, IT'S COLT.
HAVE YOU GOT PLANS THIS EVENING? YEAH.
I'M GOING OUT TO DINNER WITH JOSH.
COULD YOU MAKE THA ANOTHER NIGHT? WE'VE GOT TO REHEARSE.
REHEARSE WHAT? REMEMBER THAT BRAWL IN THE EASTWOOD PICTURE WE DID? OH.
I JUST TALKED WITH MY ASSOCIATES DOWN IN THE HILL COUNTRY.
THEY'RE GETTING READY TO SEND SOME OF OUR PEOPLE UP HERE.
I CAN HANDLE MY WIFE.
MAYBE YOU CAN, BUT YOU'RE NOT DOING IT.
YOU SEE, JORDAN, WE'VE GO QUITE A SIZABLE INVESTMEN AT STAKE HERE.
WE BOUGHT ALL OF THAT PROPERTY IN YOUR STATE BASED ON YOUR ASSURANCE THA WHEN YOU'RE ELECTED GOVERNOR, THE CASINO GAMBLING LAWS ARE GONNA BE LIBERALIZED.
AND THEY WILL BE.
IF YOU WANT, YOU CAN PUT A CRAP TABLE IN MY OUTER OFFICE.
THE WAY THINGS ARE GOING, WE'RE NOT EVEN SURE YOU'RE GONNA HAVE AN OUTER OFFICE-- IN THE GOVERNOR'S MANSION, THAT IS.
NOW, LOOK, UH, REUBEN, SLADE IS STAYING CLOSER TO SEAVERS THAN A NEW SKIN.
ANDY IS SCOURING THE AREA WHERE ROBIN GREW UP.
HE'S DOING WHATEVER HE HAS TO DO.
NOW WHAT ELSE DO I HAVE TO DO TO SATISFY YOU PEOPLE? WHY DON'T YOU SEND ME AN INVITATION TO YOUR WIFE'S FUNERAL? [ Howie .]
WHERE WE HEADED, COLT? WE'RE GOING TO ROCK CREEK WHERE ROBIN GREW UP.
IF SHE'S GOT ANY FRIENDS, THEY'LL BE HERE.
[ Slade .]
BUT YOU WON'T GET ANY INFORMATION OUT OF THEM, BECAUSE I'VE FOUND THEY'LL TRY TO PROTECT HER.
WHY DON'T YOU WAIT OUT HERE, SLADE? SEAVERS, I GOTTA HAND IT TO YOU.
YOU GOT NERVE.
YOU SAID YOU ALREADY TRIED IN THERE, AND YOUR FRIEND CAME BACK.
YEAH.
YOU ALREADY STRUCK OUT TWICE, SLADE.
IF ANYBODY'S GONNA STRIKE OUT, WE'LL ALL SWING THE BAT, RIGHT? LET'S GO.
[ Background: Country .]
HOWDY.
[ Continues, Indistinct .]
I TOLD YOUR FRIEND I DIDN' WANT EITHER ONE OF YOU IN HERE AGAIN EVER.
WELL, I GUESS HE FORGOT TO TELL ME.
CAN I BUY EVERYBODY A NICE, QUIET BEER? WE JUST RAN OU OF BEER.
UH, THIS ISN' STARTING TOO WELL, COLT.
I'M AFRAID YOUR FRIEND HERE ALREADY RUINED YOUR WELCOME.
HE'S NOT REALLY MY FRIEND.
WE JUST HAPPEN TO BE LOOKING FOR THE SAME PERSON.
YOU'RE NOT GONNA FIND HER IN HERE.
LISTEN, UH, I'M REALLY GETTIN' BORED WITH YOU HICKS.
YOU KNOW, CONGRESSMAN STEVENS WANTS HIS WIFE, AND I'M HERE TO GET HER.
WE DON'T WAN THE CONGRESSMAN TO GET UPSET, DO WE? YOU'RE JUS BREAKIN' MY HEART.
- THAT'S TOO BAD, 'CAUSE I'M GONNA BREAK YOUR FACE.
- [ Scoffing .]
OH.
COLT SEAVERS! YOU DIRTY, ROTTEN, NO-GOOD-- JODY, I CAN EXPLAIN.
OH, I BET YOU CAN EXPLAIN.
LEAVIN' ME WITH THREE HUNGRY KIDS FOR THAT WOMAN! HEY, CUT THAT OUT.
LEAVE HER ALONE.
SHE'S DOIN' JUST FINE.
[ Continues .]
HEY! HEY.
THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
WHO TAUGHT YOU HOW TO HIT LIKE THAT? YOU DID.
WORKED LIKE A CHARM, COLT.
SLADE'S GONNA BE BUSY FOR A LONG TIME.
[ Glass Crashing .]
NOW THAT WE GOT RID OF SLADE, WHERE DO WE FIND ROBIN? FIRST, WE FIND HER FATHER.
KNOCK IT OFF! COME ON! KNOCK IT OFF! [ Jody .]
HOW ARE WE GONNA FIND HIM? HE'S ALWAYS HANGIN' AROUND ON ROUTE 3.
WHAT IS HE, A PROFESSIONAL HITCHHIKER? NO.
MR.
WILSON, COLT SEAVERS.
YOU REMEMBER ME? HIYA, COLT.
NICE SEEIN' YOU AGAIN.
YOUR DAUGHTER'S IN TROUBLE.
I NEED TO FIND HER.
- COULD YOU HELP ME? - YES, I CAN.
SHE ALWAYS TRUSTED YOU, COLT, AND SHE SURE COULD USE YOUR HELP NOW.
[ Howie .]
COLT, THIS IS IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE.
HOW'D YOU FIND THIS PLACE? WELL, UH-- COLT, I HEARD THE INSTRUCTIONS, AND I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW YOU FOUND THIS PLACE.
ROBIN TOOK ME HERE A COUPLE OF TIMES.
[ Jody .]
I KNEW IT.
NO, NO.
IT'S NOT LIKE THAT.
ROBIN WAS INTO NATURE AND SURVIVAL.
COLT.
HOPE YOU GO THREE MORE OF THOSE.
I'M SORRY I RAN OUT.
IF I HAD LET ANDY AND SLADE TAKE ME BACK TO JORDAN'S HOUSE, HE WOULD'VE KILLED ME.
BECAUSE YOU CAUGHT HIM WITH WENDY.
- YOU KNOW ABOUT WENDY? - WHY DON'T YOU TELL US THE WHOLE STORY, HUH? JORDAN GOT INVOLVED WITH THESE MEN.
THEY STARTED OUT AS LARGE CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTORS.
- THEY WANTED TO BRING A NEW INDUSTRY INTO THE STATE.
- WHAT KIND OF INDUSTRY? CASINO GAMBLING.
THAT WASN'T WHAT THEY SAID AT FIRST, OF COURSE.
NO WONDER STEVENS WANTED TO SHUT ROBIN UP.
A SCANDAL LIKE THA WOULD RUIN HIS CHANCES OF BECOMING GOVERNOR.
AND HIS BACKERS' CHANCES OF LEGALIZING CASINO GAMBLING.
WE GOTTA GET YOU TO THE SHERIFF.
THAT'S THE SAFEST PLACE FOR YOU.
NO, COLT.
I'M SAFE RIGHT HERE WHERE I AM.
ROBIN-- NO! LISTEN TO HIM, ROBIN.
IF HE CAN FIND YOU, THEY CAN FIND YOU.
- WHAT'S HE DOING HERE? - DAN'S MY BABY BROTHER.
HE WAS IN THE ARMY THE SUMMER YOU WERE UP HERE FILMING.
WHAT HAPPENED TO SLADE AFTER WE LEFT? WE CHASED HIM OFF, LIKE WE THOUGH WE CHASED YOU OFF.
- YOU CAME STRAIGHT HERE? - THAT'S RIGHT.
OH, THAT'S GREAT.
ROBIN, GET YOUR STUFF TOGETHER.
KID, CHECK OUT FRONT.
[ Gun Cocks .]
NO NEED TO WORRY ABOUT OUT FRONT, SEAVERS.
THERE'S NOBODY OUT THERE.
ANDY, GET YOUR GUN FROM MRS.
STEVENS'S POCKET, PLEASE.
I WANT YOU TO COLLEC THEIR SLEEPING BAGS.
I WANT YOU TO PUT OUT THE FIRE.
OH, BY THE WAY, I'LL NEED YOUR JACKETS.
- I'M NOT GOING BACK WITH YOU.
- ROBIN, YOU'RE GOING BACK WITH ME.
AND YOUR FRIENDS ARE GONNA STAY HERE WITH MIKE UNTIL WE GET THAT FILM OUT OF YOUR CAMERA.
YOU CAN'T STRAND THEM OUT HERE.
IT'S 40 MILES BACK TO ASPEN.
I KNOW, AND THE TEMPERATURE'S DROPPING VERY FAST.
AND BESIDES THAT, IT'S SUPPOSED TO SNOW BEFORE MORNING.
ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GO WITH YOU.
BUT YOU CAN'T LEAVE THEM HERE TO FREEZE TO DEATH.
OF COURSE I CAN.
LET'S GO.
[ Slade .]
YOU WON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SEAVERS ANYMORE WITH MIKE GUARDING HIM IN THAT CAVE.
[ Howie .]
THAT WAS REALLY SOMETHING THE WAY YOU DECKED THAT GUY BACK THERE.
IT WAS LIKE OUT OF A MOVIE.
[ Colt .]
IT WAS OUT OF A MOVIE, KID.
[ Jody .]
COLT, I'M COLD, AND I'M TIRED.
I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN MAKE IT.
JODY, YOU HAVE TO.
IT'S OUR ONLY CHANCE.
ARE YOU SURE ABOU THIS SURVIVAL SHELTER? NO, BUT IT WAS FULLY STOCKED THE FIRST OF THE WEEK.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN FULLY STOCKED? OH, BLANKETS, SNOWSHOES.
MAYBE EVEN SOME SKIS.
HOW ABOUT A RADIO? WELL, THERE SHOULD BE AN EMERGENCY TRANSMITTER THERE.
[ Jody, Panting .]
GOOD.
WE CAN SIGNAL FOR HELP.
HOW FAST CAN THEY GET HERE? DEPENDS ON HOW BUSY THEY ARE.
CONGRESSMAN, THIS IS MIKE.
SEAVERS JUMPED ME, AND THEY GOT AWAY.
BUT THEY'RE HEADED UP THE TRAIL.
LEADS RIGHT PAST YOUR PLACE.
ROBIN TOLD HIM EVERYTHING.
YOU'LL NEED HELP.
I DON'T HAVE ANY HELP.
NEVER MIND.
I'LL TAKE CARE OF SEAVERS MYSELF.
HURRY UP.
I'M FREEZING.
PLENTY OF BLANKETS, BUT NO RADIO.
HOW FAR IS I TO STEVENS'S CHALET? IT'S 40 MILES BACK TO ASPEN.
- NO, NOT THAT WAY.
THAT WAY.
- THERE IS A PASS THROUGH THERE, BUT-- IT'S ONLY A FEW MILES, BUT THEY'RE A ROUGH FEW MILES.
LIKE I TOLD YOU IN THE CAVE, IT GOES THROUGH STEVENS'S VALLEY WHERE HIS HENCHMEN ARE.
MOST OF 'EM SEEM BUSY THOUGH.
WE DON'T HAVE A CHOICE.
- DON'T FORGE IT'S AVALANCHE COUNTRY.
- HERE.
TAKE THIS.
HOPE YOU GET TO ROBIN IN TIME.
- YOU GUYS GONNA BE OKAY? - WE'LL BE OKAY.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT US.
GOOD LUCK.
[ Gunshot .]
[ Gunshots .]
[ Stevens .]
AVALANCHE! LET'S GET OUTTA HERE! [ Starter Grinding .]
[ Andy .]
THE CAR'S STALLED! IT WON'T START! [ Stevens .]
SEAVERS CAN' GET AWAY.
THE AVALANCHE IS RIGHT ON TOP OF HIM.
[ Loud Rumbling .]
COME ON! QUICK! GET UNDER THE CAR! IT'S OUR ONLY CHANCE! [ People Screaming .]
[ Rumbling Stops .]
[ People Screaming In Distance .]
COME ON.
[ Robin Whimpering .]
COME ON.
COME ON.
[ Coughing .]
[ Siren Wailing .]
OH, JORDAN.
COME ON! [ Siren Continues .]
JOSH! JOSH! IT WAS FANTASTIC! DID YOU SEE IT? SEE IT? HELL, I WAS IN IT.
[ Siren Stops .]
[ Siren Approaching .]
COME ON! QUICK! GET IN THE AMBULANCE! IT'S STEVENS AND ROBIN IN THE AMBULANCE.
LET'S GET GOIN'.
JOSH, THIS JEEP GOT ANY GUTS? PLEASE, COLT! IT'S MY BRAND-NEW JEEP.
DON'T WRECK IT.
[ Tires Screeching .]
JORDAN! LOOK OUT! JORDAN! [ Screams .]
[ Screaming .]
HELP! HELP! [ Brakes Squealing .]
GET SOME ROPE, JOSH.
GO AHEAD.
I'LL GET IT.
[ Whimpering .]
HELP ME! [ Colt .]
ROBIN, HANG ON! JUST HANG STEADY.
I'M ON MY WAY.
HURRY, COLT! I'M SLIPPING! I CAN'T HOLD ON! HURRY, COLT! IT'S-- IT'S BREAKING! DON'T PANIC, ROBIN.
I'M ALMOST THERE.
HANG ON, ROBIN.
HANG ON.
WE'LL GET YOU.
OH! OH! [ Whimpers .]
[ Robin Crying .]
I CAN'T HOLD ON ANYMORE.
I GOT YA.
[ Crying, Whimpering .]
- A LITTLE MORE LINE, JOSH.
- PLEASE HURRY! I CAN'T HOLD ON MUCH LONGER.
STEADY, ROBIN.
JUST AS SOON AS I PU THIS ROPE AROUND YOU, WE'LL PULL YOU UP.
[ Bridge Creaking .]
[ Grunts .]
- [ Josh Straining .]
- COLT! [ Josh .]
YOU GUYS ARE HEAVY.
[ Colt .]
BOY, I'M GLAD THAT'S OVER WITH.
YOU CAME THROUGH FOR ME, JOSH.
I DID, DIDN'T I? IT FEELS GOOD TO BE A HERO.
EXCEPT-- EXCEPT WHAT? EXCEPT I SURE WISH I HAD IT ON FILM.
I THINK IT'S ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE THAT JORDAN COULD'VE SURVIVED THAT.
IF HE HADN'T HIT A DEEP SPO IN THAT RIVER WHEN HE FELL FROM THE AMBULANCE, HE WOULDN'T HAVE.
HOWIE, YOU AND COL ARE REAL HEROES.
OH, IT WAS NOTHIN'.
WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE, I'M GONNA SHOW YOU ALL THE GRATITUDE YOU CAN HANDLE.
ROBIN, I'M REALLY SORRY ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN JORDAN AND ME.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, WENDY.
I THINK YOU MIGHT HAVE DONE ME A BIGGER FAVOR THAN YOU'LL EVER KNOW.
COLT.
I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU'VE DONE.
I HAVE REALLY LEARNED MY LESSON.
NO MORE FANCY PEOPLE.
I'M GONNA SETTLE DOWN IN ROCK CREEK AGAIN WITH MY FAMILY.
CATCH YOU LATER.
BYE-BYE.
GOOD-BYE.
MMM.
COME ON, DAN.
COLT, YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THIS.
LOVE WHAT? - OUR MOVIE.
- OUR MOVIE? WHAT MOVIE? IT'S BASED ON THE LAST TWO DAYS-- KIND OF A MOVIE WITHIN A MOVIE, LIKE TRUFFAUT DID IN DAY FOR NIGHT.
DOWNHILL TO DEATH.
DON'T YOU LOVE IT? - I THOUGHT OF THE TITLE.
- CONGRATULATIONS.
BUT I FIGURE WE CAN COWRITE THE SCRIPT.
I'LL DIRECT, OF COURSE, AND YOU CAN DO ALL THE STUNTS.
WE'LL GET BURT AND BOB AND BARBRA TO STAR.
- WHAT A CAST, HUH? WHAT A FILM! - HOLD ON.
THE ONLY SNOW I WANT TO SEE FROM NOW ON IS ON TELEVISION.
BUT-- BUT I HAVE A PRODUCER IN L.
A.
READY TO TAKE A MEETING.
JOSH, YOU TELL THE PRODUCER TO TAKE HIS MEETING AND-- NEVER MIND.
JUST FORGET IT.
I'LL SEE YOU TWO BACK AT THE LODGE.
DON'T WORRY.
I'LL TALK HIM INTO IT.
COLT.
WAIT NOW.
JOSH-- CAN'T WE EVEN TALK ABOUT IT? NO, JOSH.
OKAY.
YOU CAN BE CODIRECTOR.
- JOSH-- - I'LL GET YOU YOUR OWN MOTOR HOME.
- JOSH-- - I'LL EVEN GET YOU YOUR OWN STUNTMAN.
[ Colt .]
OKAY.
I ACCEPT.
BU I WANT YOU TO BE THE STUNTMAN.
[ Josh .]
ME, COLT? THAT'S DANGEROUS.
I COULD GET KILLED.
RIGHT.

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