The Fall Guy (1981) s01e22 Episode Script

Scavenger Hunt

WELL, I'M NOT THE KIND TO KISS AND TELL BUT I'VE BEEN SEEN WITH FARRAH I'VE NEVER BEEN WITH ANYTHING LESS THAN A NINE SO FINE I'VE BEEN ON FIRE WITH SALLY FIELD GONE FAS WITH A GIRL NAMED BO BUT SOMEHOW THEY JUS DON'T END UP AS MINE IT'S A DEATH-DEFYIN' LIFE I LEAD I TAKE MY CHANCES I DIE FOR A LIVIN' IN THE MOVIES AND TV [ Siren Wailing ] BUT THE HARDEST THING I EVER DO IS WATCH MY LEADING LADIES KISS SOME OTHER GUY WHILE I'M BANDAGIN' MY KNEE I MIGHT FALL FROM A TALL BUILDIN' I MIGHT ROLL A BRAND-NEW CAR 'CAUSE I'M THE UNKNOWN STUNTMAN THAT MADE REDFORD SUCH A STAR [ Women Vocalizing ] I'VE NEVER SPEN MUCH TIME IN SCHOOL BUT I'VE TAUGH LADIES PLENTY IT'S TRUE I HIRE MY BODY OUT FOR PAY HEY, HEY I'VE GOTTEN BURNED OVER CHERYL TIEGS BLOWN UP FOR RAQUEL WELCH BUT WHEN I WIND UP IN THE HAY, IT'S ONLY HAY HEY, HEY I MIGHT JUMP AN OPEN DRAWBRIDGE OR TARZAN FROM A VINE 'CAUSE I'M THE UNKNOWN STUNTMAN THAT MAKES EASTWOOD LOOK SO FINE [ Colt Narrating ] THIS IS THE STORY OF ONE OF AMERICA'S GREAT UNSUNG HEROES.
I MEAN, YOU'VE SEEN HIM, BUT YOU NEVER KNEW WHO HE WAS.
YOU'VE CHEERED FOR HIM AND CRIED FOR HIM, WOMEN HAVE WANTED TO DIE FOR HIM.
BUT DID HE EVER GET ANY CREDIT? OR THE GIRL? NO.
HE WAS WHAT WE CALL A STUNTMAN.
AND THE REASON I'M TALKIN' SO FONDLY ABOUT HIM IS-- WELL, BECAUSE IT'S ME, COLT SEAVERS.
ANYWAY, PICTURE WORK ISN'T WALL-TO-WALL EMPLOYMENT.
SO MAYBE YOU WONDER HOW A GUY KEEPS HIS HEAD TOGETHER.
WELL, ONE WAY IS TO WAIT BY THE PHONE AND WAIT AND WAIT.
THE OTHER IS TO TAKE AN OCCASIONAL JOB FOR THE COURT SYSTEM OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, WHERE A MAN IS CONSIDERED INNOCEN UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY.
UNFORTUNATELY, SOMETIMES A LO OF THESE PEOPLE GET OUT OF JAIL ON WHAT WE CALL BAIL.
AND THEY RUN LIKE HELL.
THAT'S WHERE I COME IN.
I SOMETIMES PICK UP RENT MONEY TRYIN' TO FIND THEM AND BRING THEM BACK TO JUSTICE.
[ Thunderclap ] [ Thunderclaps ] I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, BUT I JUST SAW IT.
A KILLER GHOST.
[ Screams ] [ Man ] HOLD IT! FREEZE! JODY, TAKE HER PLACE! GO, JODY.
[ Screams ] - THAT CUE WAS TOO EARLY.
- ALL RIGHT.
HOLD IT! HOLD IT! CUT IT! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO DO? I'M SORRY.
THE SPECIAL EFFECTS MAN MISSED HIS CUE.
THERE IS NO CUE WHILE I'M ON CAMERA.
WE DON'T RISK ME.
YOU WAIT UNTIL THERE'S A STUNTMAN UP THERE.
[ Bell Ringing ] I PROMISE YOU, IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.
ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT.
THAT'S IT FOR TODAY, EVERYBODY! THAT'S IT.
AND YOU REMEMBER ONE THING, THERE ARE A LOT OF STUNTMEN AROUND, BUT THERE'S ONLY ONE JAN MURRAY.
BOY, A GUY CAN GET KILLED AROUND HERE.
- ALL RIGHT, FOLKS.
THAT'S A WRAP.
- YOU, NOT ME.
[ Chuckles ] YOU MEAN WE HAVE TO DO THIS AGAIN TOMORROW? WELL, JODY, ON YOU IT LOOKS GOOD.
[ Scoffs ] COLT, HOW 'BOUT IF I TAKE YOUR PLACE TOMORROW? I CAN HIT THE MARK.
THERE WON'T BE ANY PROBLEM.
I CAN SEE IN THE DARK LIKE A CAT.
IT'S A BAT.
AND, KID, EVERY STUN HAS A PROBLEM.
HERE, JODY.
COME ON.
LET'S GO TO WARDROBE.
[ Groans ] HI, COLT.
HI, HERVÉ.
HEY, WHEN YOU GONNA SHRINK ENOUGH TO DO MY STUNTS? WELL, YOU GOT ONE OF THE BEST THERE IS.
WELL, YOU KNOW, IT'S KIND OF EMBARRASSING FOR THE LITTLE GUY TO BE CALLED TO DO ALL THE DANGEROUS STUFF.
YOU KNOW WHAT? MY DOUBLE IS GONNA JUMP OU OF AN AIRPLANE.
YEAH, WELL, TREAT HIM NICE.
LET HIM WEAR A PARACHUTE.
DON'T WORRY.
BYE.
[ Laughs ] CATCH YOU LATER.
HELLO, JOE.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? WELL, IT WAS IMPORTAN TO ME TO MAKE SURE AN OLD FRIEND WASN'T ALL ALONE ON A MOMENTOUS DAY.
COME ON, I'LL GIVE YOU A RIDE BACK TO TOWN.
I DON'T WANT ANYTHING FROM YOU.
OH.
WELL, I DO FROM YOU.
NOW, WHY DON'T YOU DRIVE? I KNOW IT'S BEEN FIVE YEARS AND YOU'RE PROBABLY RUSTY, BUT DON'T WORRY, I'LL BE WATCHING YOU.
AH-AH.
HEY.
MAKE THAT MILK AND COOKIES.
WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, A KID? NO, YOU'RE IN TRAINING-- JUST LIKE A PILO 10 HOURS BEFORE FLIGHT.
YOUR NERVES HAVE TO BE STEADY, YOUR EYES CLEAR AND YOUR HEART PURE.
[ Man On TV ] BEAUTIFUL DROP VOLLEY FOR A WINNER.
YOU MEAN I GET TO DO THAT GAG TOMORROW? - YEAH.
- GREAT! HEY, WHERE'RE YOU GOING? I'M GOING OUT-- TO DO EVERYTHING I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO.
[ Man On TV ] GREAT PASSING SHO DOWN THE LINE.
THIS IS BAD FOR YOU.
NO, NO.
YEAH! [ Man On TV ] LAVER TO SERVE FOR THE FIRST GAME.
[ Static ] I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.
YOU CAN FORGET IT.
COME ON.
I'M NOT GONNA BE UNREASONABLE, JOE.
ALL I WANT IS 50%.
WE SPLIT THE FIVE MILLION.
WE'RE GONE BEFORE THE OTHERS KNOW ABOUT IT.
WISE UP, JOE.
THE ONLY TIME YOU DON'T SHARE IS WHEN YOU'RE DEAD.
[ Tires Screeching ] HOLD IT RIGHT THERE! HEY, OFFICER.
LOOK, THAT GUY, HE'S GOT A-- OH, THE HELL WITH IT.
[ Groans ] OKAY.
COME ON, WISE GUY, INTO THE CAR.
GET IN THERE.
[ Country ] [ Man On TV ] EXCELLENT FOREHAND RIGH ON THE LINE FOR A WINNER.
THAT MAKES THE SCORE 30-LOVE.
WELL, WELL.
THIRTY-LOVE.
WELL, AIN'T THAT SWEET.
HEY.
HEY, KNOCK IT OFF.
I LIKE TENNIS.
OH, REALLY, SWEETHEART? WELL, I BET YOU DO.
HEY.
HEY.
YOU CAN' HIT ME.
I'M A STUNTMAN.
IT'S LIKE TRYING TO HIT A SHADOW.
[ Siren Wailing ] [ Loud Snoring ] [ Snoring Continues ] I WONDER WHAT TENNIS MATCH HE WAS WATCHING.
DADDY.
HI, BABE.
I CAME AS SOON AS YOU CALLED.
[ Snoring ] YOU STILL MY GIRL? YOU BET I AM.
IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME.
HOW ARE THINGS GOING? WONDERFUL.
MY ACTING COACH SAYS I'M GETTING BETTER EVERY DAY.
HE THINKS I HAVE STAR QUALITY.
I TOLD YOU THA A LONG TIME AGO.
UH, YOU HAVE ANY LUCK GETTING COLLATERAL FOR MY BAIL? [ Sighs ] NO.
I'M SORRY.
[ Chuckles ] THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
UH-- HEY, UH, I'M IN SHOW BUSINESS TOO.
REALLY? YEAH.
HOWIE MUNSON.
JUNE EDWARDS.
I SPEND ALL MY TIME OUT AT THE STUDIOS.
OH, REALLY? HOW LUCKY.
DO YOU KNOW BARBRA STREISAND? KNOW HER? I WAS HER.
[ Laughs ] YOU KNOW, THE HARDEST PAR WAS FINDING A PAIR OF SIZE 13 HIGH-HEEL PUMPS.
I SEE.
HE'S BEEN NICE TO ME.
HE WORKS PART-TIME FOR A BAIL BOND COMPANY AS A TRACKER.
HE SAYS HE CAN FIND THE INVISIBLE MAN AND FOLLOW TARZAN FROM VINE TO VINE.
WHEN I CALLED ABOU MY OWN BAIL, I TOLD BIG JACK ABOUT YOUR FATHER.
DOES HE WEAR HIGH HEELS TOO? - WELL, AS A MATTER OF FACT SHE-- - [ Chuckles ] OH.
OH, NO.
YOU-- YOU'VE GOT ME ALL WRONG.
I'M A STUNTMAN.
I HAVE TO LOOK LIKE THE PERSON I'M DOING THE STUNT FOR.
OH, REALLY? AND JUST WHO ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE NOW? BOY, AM I GLAD TO SEE YOU.
I WISH THE FEELING WERE MUTUAL.
A BARROOM BRAWL? HOWIE, YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF.
- HEY, I'M INNOCENT.
- OH, REALLY? THAT'S WHAT THEY ALL SAY.
SO HOW COME IT TOOK YOU ALL NIGHT TO GET HERE? BECAUSE I ASKED MY SERVICE TO HOLD ALL MY CALLS.
ANYWAY, YOU SHOULD HAVE CALLED COLT.
I DID.
HE DIDN'T ANSWER.
OH, BY THE WAY, THIS IS JOE EDWARDS, THE GUY I TOLD YOU ABOUT.
ANY HELP YOU CAN GIVE HIM WOULD BE APPRECIATED.
HOWIE, I DON' NEED APPRECIATION, I NEED COLLATERAL.
- MY FATHER'S HONEST.
- OH, REALLY? THEN WHAT'S HE DOING HERE? I'M SORRY, I DON'T REALLY MEAN TO BE RUDE.
IT'S-- IT'S JUST THAT I GO CALLED OUT OF A NICE WARM BED.
I'M SORRY WE WOKE YOU UP.
I WASN'T SLEEPING.
MISS JACK.
MISS JACK, PLEASE, I NEED YOUR HELP.
- WILL YOU HELP US? - [ Snoring Continues ] BOY, YOU OUGHT TO FEEL REAL PROUD.
JUNE SEEMS LIKE A WONDERFUL GIRL.
THANKS.
UNFORTUNATELY, I HAD VERY LITTLE TO DO WITH IT.
WELL, THEN HER MOTHER MUST HAVE BEEN-- NO.
SH-SHE MISSED OUT ON THAT TOO.
SHE WAS BROUGH UP IN PRIVATE SCHOOLS.
- JOE EDWARDS.
- YEAH.
YOUR BAIL'S BEEN PUT UP.
YOU CAN GO.
HOWIE, I CAN' THANK YOU ENOUGH.
I DON'T BELIEVE SHE DID IT.
WHY NOT? WELL, BIG JACK'S A REALIS WHEN IT COMES TO LIFE.
UH, NO "TICKEE," NO LAUNDRY.
NO COLLATERAL, NO BAIL.
YOU SURE SOMEBODY ELSE DIDN'T DO IT? - WHO PUT UP MY BAIL? - STEVEN BATES.
I HAVE THE RIGHT TO TURN IT DOWN, DON'T I? - YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT TO DO.
- I'M STAYING.
OKAY.
UH-- HOWIE, UH, I-I'VE BEEN IN JAIL FIVE YEARS.
I THINK I CAN TRUST YOU.
[ Chuckles ] WHAT THE HELL AM I SAYING? I HAVE TO TRUST YOU.
MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT.
MY DAUGHTER'S FUTURE.
WILL YOU HELP ME? WELL, OF COURSE I WILL, IF I CAN.
LOOK, I GOTTA GET OU OF HERE ON MY OWN.
I-I-- I DON' HAVE COLLATERAL, BUT I HAVE THE CASH.
WELL, WHY DON'T YOU SEND JUNE TO GET IT? NO.
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
THEY KNOW HER.
I HAVE FIVE MILLION DOLLARS IN CASH, AND THESE MEN WILL DO ANYTHING TO GET THEIR HANDS ON IT.
LOOK, I'LL GIVE YOU A HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS IN CASH IF YOU'LL GO TO SAN DIEGO AND GET MY BAIL.
A HUNDRED THOUSAND? A HUNDRED THOUSAND.
HOWARD MUNSON.
YOU CAN GO.
HOWIE-- GO TO SAN DIEGO, FIND ROSE BUTTERWORTH.
SHE'LL GIVE YOU THE BAIL.
ROSE BUTTERWORTH.
WH-WHAT'S HER ADDRESS? I-I'M NOT SURE.
SHE MOVES AROUND A LOT.
BUT WITH YOUR EXPERIENCE, YOU'LL FIND HER.
PLEASE, IF NOT FOR ME, WILL YOU DO IT FOR JUNE? I-- I DON'T WANT TO SEE HER HURT ANYMORE BECAUSE OF ME.
PLEASE.
YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN HELP.
OKAY, OKAY.
I'LL HANDLE IT.
BUT I'VE GOT AN IMPORTAN STUNT TO DO FIRST.
I'D LIKE TO TALK TO YOU, IF YOU COULD SPARE A MINUTE.
WELL, WHAT ABOUT? I'D RATHER DO I AWAY FROM HERE.
I'M STEVEN BATES.
THIS IS ABEL ALLEN.
- YOU'RE THE GUY WHO TRIED TO BAIL OUT JOE.
- THAT'S RIGHT.
AND A LITTLE BIT OF A PARADOX.
I PUT HIM INTO PRISON IN THE FIRST PLACE.
HE WAS PART OF A GANG THA STOLE A FIVE MILLION DOLLAR NAVY PAYROLL IN HAWAII.
WE'RE WITH NAVAL INTELLIGENCE.
[ Mouths Word ] WHY ALL THE ROUGH STUFF WITH THE GUNS? EXPEDIENCE.
WE HAD TO GET YOU AWAY FROM THE JAIL QUICKLY.
YOU SEE, THERE ARE MEMBERS OF HIS OLD GANG STILL LOOKING FOR HIM.
LOOK, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOU AND I DON'T REALLY CARE.
AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, I'M READY TO FORGET THAT I EVER MET JOE EDWARDS OR EITHER OF YOU GUYS.
WE WERE HOPING YOU WOULD TELL US WHAT EDWARDS TOLD YOU.
- HE ASKED ME TO GET BAIL FOR HIM.
- WHERE? - SAN DIEGO.
- FROM WHOM? A WOMAN NAMED ROSE BUTTERWORTH.
MR.
MUNSON, YOU HAVE TO HELP US LOCATE THIS ROSE BUTTERWORTH.
YOU KNOW WHAT I KNOW.
SHE'S IN SAN DIEGO.
GO FIND HER YOURSELF.
NO GOOD.
LET'S SAY WE DO FIND HER.
SHE'LL BE SUSPICIOUS.
SHE'LL ASK US QUESTIONS ABOUT EDWARDS NEITHER OF US COULD POSSIBLY ANSWER.
WHEN HE GOT OUT OF PRISON, I TRIED TO CONVINCE HIM I WAS A CROOK TOO, THAT WE'D SPLIT THE MONEY, SO HE COULD LEAD US TO IT, BUT HE WAS TOO SMART.
SHE MIGHT BE THE MISSING LINK WE'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR.
AND IF JOE TRUSTS YOU, MORE THAN LIKELY THE WOMAN WILL TOO.
WELL, I STILL DON'T KNOW WHY HE TRUSTED ME.
HE HAD TO.
RAN OUT OF OPTIONS.
WELL, SHE ONLY HAS TO GIVE ME THE BAIL MONEY.
WHAT'S THAT GOT TO DO WITH YOUR FIVE MILLION BUCKS? EDWARDS STASHED THE MONEY WITH SOMEONE.
WE'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THAT SOMEONE FOR FIVE YEARS.
YOU MAY HAVE JUST GIVEN US THE LEAD WE'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR.
IF SHE'S IT, SHE COULD LEAD YOU TO ALL THE MONEY TO GET SOME OF IT.
I'D LIKE TO HELP YOU GUYS-- - IT'S YOUR DUTY.
- I'VE GOT A JOB TO DO.
- WE'LL CLEAR IT.
- NAH, IT'S TOO IMPORTANT.
MORE THAN YOUR PATRIOTISM? [ Colt ] HE STILL HASN'T SHOWN UP? NO, AND I'M GETTING REALLY WORRIED.
HE WOULDN' JUST DISAPPEAR.
NO, HE WOULD'VE PHONED OR LEFT A MESSAGE.
YOU DON'T SUPPOSE SOMETHING HAPPENED TO HIM, DO YOU? OH, I DON'T KNOW.
AFTER THIS FALL, I'LL FIND OUT.
[ Man ] READY, COLT? [ Buzzer Buzzes ] YEAH.
LET'S DO IT.
COME ON, KID.
QUIET ON THE SET.
WE'RE ROLLING.
SCENE 201.
TAKE 14.
MARKER.
[ Man ] ALL RIGHT.
ACTION.
[ Thunderclap ] [ Murray ] I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, BUT I JUST SAW IT.
A KILLER GHOST.
[ Screams ] ALL RIGHT, HOLD IT.
FREEZE.
JODY, STEP IN.
BE READY, COLT.
OUT, HONEY.
OUT.
- GO, JODY.
- [ Screams ] - COLT, YOU'RE ON.
- PLEASE, YOU'VE GOTTA HELP ME.
IN A MINUTE.
IN A MINUTE.
EVERY SECOND COUNTS.
JUST A MINUTE.
CUT.
CUT.
HOW MANY TIMES CAN I DO THE SAME SCENE? COLT, WHAT'S GOIN' ON? LOOK, I'M SORRY.
IT WAS, UH, MY FAULT.
LOOK, I CAN HAVE JODY DRIED UP AND WE CAN TRY IT AGAIN IN 20 MINUTES.
YEAH.
WELL, ALL RIGHT.
WE'LL TRY IT AGAIN THIS AFTERNOON.
NEXT SETUP.
[ Man #2 ] ALL RIGHT.
NEW SETUP.
I'VE REALLY DONE I THIS TIME, HAVEN'T I? BEFORE YOU DO IT AGAIN, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? WELL, MY FATHER'S BEEN ACCUSED OF BEATING UP A POLICE OFFICER.
- WHAT'S THAT GOT TO DO WITH ME? - WELL, WE MET YOUR FRIEND HOWIE IN JAIL.
- JAIL? HOWIE? HOWIE'S IN JAIL? - HE BEAT UP A BUNCH OF TRUCK DRIVERS.
COLT.
TELEPHONE.
UH-- TRUCK DRIVERS? COLT SEAVERS.
HI.
IT'S ME.
HOWIE.
HOWIE.
WHAT-- WHAT MADE YOU BEA UP A BUNCH OF TRUCK DRIVERS? IT WASN'T A BUNCH.
IT WAS ONLY THREE.
- WHY'D YOU BEAT UP THREE TRUCK DRIVERS? - I DIDN'T.
THEY KNOCKED ME OUT.
WELL, WHERE ARE YOU? I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT.
- HOWIE, YOU LISTEN TO ME-- - COLT, THE ONLY REASON I GOT TO CALL YOU WAS BECAUSE I TOLD THEM YOU WERE AS PATRIOTIC AS ANYBODY.
- TOLD WHO? - I CAN'T TELL YOU THA EITHER.
- LOOK, WHERE ARE YOU? I'M COMING TO GET YOU.
- NO, YOU CAN'T.
- WE'RE ON OUR WAY TO SAN DIEGO.
- WHAT ABOUT THE GAG? THERE'S STILL TIME.
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO FILL IN FOR ME.
LOOK, IT'S IMPORTAN TO YOUR CAREER.
- COLT, THERE ARE THINGS THA ARE MORE IMPORTANT IN LIFE.
- LIKE WHAT? OUR COUNTRY.
HOW-- HOWIE.
NOW, LET'S STAR AT THE BEGINNING.
HOW DID YOU GET HERE? UH-- BIG JACK.
AFTER SHE BAILED OUT HOWIE, SHE TOLD ME YOU COULD HELP ME GET MY FATHER OUT.
- WHY IS HOWIE GOING TO SAN DIEGO? - I DON'T KNOW.
YOU'RE COMING WITH ME.
WHERE ARE WE GOING? TO JAIL.
[ Man ] TWO BRUTES OVER ON THE RIGHT SIDE.
[ June ] BUT, DADDY, I KNOW YOU CAN TRUST HIM.
THE LESS BOTH OF YOU KNOW, THE BETTER.
LOOK, AT LEAST TELL ME WHY YOU SENT HOWIE DOWN TO SAN DIEGO.
- HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT? - HE TOLD ME ON THE PHONE.
WHAT ELSE DID HE TELL YOU? HE SOUNDED LIKE HE WAS GOING OFF TO WAR.
HE SAID HE HAD A COUPLE OF MORE MEN WITH HIM.
THEN THEY CAUGHT UP WITH HIM.
WHO CAUGHT UP WITH HIM? SOME OF MY OLD NAVY FRIENDS.
LOOK, DOES THIS PUT HOWIE INTO SOME KIND OF DANGER? WAIT.
I'M WARNING YOU.
IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO THAT KID, BELIEVE ME, YOU BETTER PRAY YOU NEVER GET OUT OF HERE, BECAUSE I'LL BE WAITING ON YOU.
DON'T YOU DARE TALK TO MY FATHER THAT WAY.
HE'S A GOOD MAN.
WELL, GOOD MEN DON'T RISK OTHER PEOPLE'S LIVES.
IT'S ALL RIGHT, JUNE.
HE'S RIGHT.
LOOK, WE'LL MAKE A DEAL.
- WHAT KIND OF DEAL? - YOU GET ME OUT OF HERE, AND WE'LL HANDLE THIS TOGETHER.
I SWEAR TO YOU, IT'S THE ONLY WAY.
ALL RIGHT.
COME ON.
BYE, BABY.
- [ Colt ] USE MY TRUCK AS COLLATERAL.
- YOU'RE JOKING.
YEAH, A LAUGH A MINUTE.
LOOK, I GOT A JOB TO FINISH.
YOU TELL YOUR FATHER TO WAIT FOR ME AT THE JAIL.
HE'LL BE THERE.
WHAT IF HE SKIPS? THEN I'LL BRING HIM BACK.
FREE? IT'S MY TRUCK.
[ Sighs ] AND MY MONEY.
CUT.
PRINT IT.
BEAUTIFUL.
COLT, I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU DOING THIS STUNT FOR ME.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
NO, THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU.
I MEAN, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH IT MEANS FOR ME.
JODY, DON'T BE GRATEFUL NOW.
OKAY? WHY NOT? 'CAUSE I HATE WATER-- EVEN AS A CHASER.
JOE.
YOU LOOK A LITTLE NERVOUS.
IF YOU MET COLLINS, YOU WOULD BE TOO.
YEAH? WHO IS HE? A NAVY COMMANDER.
THE DEADLIEST OF THE BUNCH.
WHAT DOES HE WANT? THE FIVE MILLION DOLLARS I STOLE.
WHY DON'T YOU GIVE IT BACK? I WISH I COULD, BUT ROSE HAS IT.
SHE'S IN SAN DIEGO? SOMEWHERE.
WHERE'S JUNE? UH, SHE WEN TO THE LADIES' ROOM.
ALONE? HEY.
EXCUSE ME.
HAVE YOU SEEN A BLONDE GIRL, ABOUT 18, GREEN SWEATER, PALE YELLOW PANTS? YEAH, SHE JUST LEFT.
WHICH WAY DID SHE GO? THAT WAY WITH A NAVY OFFICER.
OH, MY GOD.
HEY, YOU, WAIT.
HEY.
MOVE IT! - [ Tires Squealing ] - WHOA! ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? YEAH.
THEY GOT JUNE.
SHE'S IN TERRIBLE DANGER.
AND SO IS HOWIE.
WHERE TO, SIR? TO FIVE MILLION DOLLARS.
THERE IT IS, FOLKS.
CATCH THIS.
ROSE BUTTERWORTH, MARRIED 20 YEARS AGO, AND GUESS WHO TO? RIGHT THE FIRST TIME.
JOE EDWARDS.
- WHAT ELSE? - WELL, THAT'S IT.
- THAT'S IT? - IT LEAVES US NOWHERE.
HEY, THERE YOU GO AGAIN.
NEGATIVE.
NOW, WHERE THE HELL IS ROSE BUTTERWORTH? WHAT NOW? WELL, I WAS JUST TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT COL WOULD DO NEXT.
HE'S THE BEST, YOU KNOW.
HE'S THE ONE WHO TAUGHT ME ABOUT TRACKING PEOPLE.
[ Sighs ] DO YOU THINK THIS GUY IS STALLING? I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, MAYBE HE'S SMARTER THAN HE ACTS.
THAT WOULDN'T BE HARD.
WE-- HEY.
I GOT IT.
JOE EDWARDS WENT TO PRISON FIVE YEARS AGO, RIGHT? MM-HMM.
WELL, HE KNEW THAT ROSE LIVED IN SAN DIEGO, RIGHT? MM-HMM.
HE GAVE ME HER MAIDEN NAME, WHICH MEANS THAT SHE WASN'T LIVING DOWN HERE UNDER HER MARRIED NAME.
SO? SO, THE DIVORCE RECORDS ARE DOWN THE HALL.
[ Sighs ] BUT I KEEP TELLING YOU, I DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING.
HMM.
YOU'LL REMEMBER.
I FOUND SOMETHING BETTER THAN SODIUM PENTOTHAL FOR JOGGING THE MEMORY.
- WHAT'S THAT, SIR? - FEAR.
[ Stutters ] WELL, I'D FEEL TERRIFIED TOO IF I WERE FACING WHAT YOU ARE.
I'D TELL HIM WHATEVER YOU KNOW, MISS.
ALL MY DADDY EVER TOLD ME WAS THAT IF I WAS EVER IN ANY SERIOUS TROUBLE, I SHOULD CALL ROSE BUTTERWORTH IN SAN DIEGO.
ROSE BUTTERWORTH? AND DID YOU CALL HER? ONCE, A LONG TIME AGO, BUT THE NUMBER WAS DISCONNECTED.
DO YOU REMEMBER THE NUMBER? YES, I HAD TO MEMORIZE IT.
UH, 555-1001.
DAWSON, CHECK IT THROUGH INTELLIGENCE.
YES, SIR.
HELLO, MOBILE ONE.
I STILL THINK WE SHOULD HAVE FLOWN.
BY THE TIME WE MADE IT TO THE AIRPORT, GOT A PLANE, FLEW DOWN, RENTED A CAR, HOWIE WOULD HAVE FOUND YOUR ROSE AND HAVE BEEN LONG GONE.
- IS HE THAT GOOD A TRACKER? - WELL, I TAUGHT HIM.
[ Buzzer Buzzing ] LIEUTENAN COMMANDER COLLINS.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THANK YOU.
NUMBER'S FOUR YEARS OLD, DISCONNECTED.
I TOLD YOU.
I GOT THE ADDRESS.
LET'S GO THERE.
YES, SIR.
IT WAS FOR JUNE.
EVERYTHING I DID WAS FOR HER.
YEAH, WELL, MAYBE STAYING HOME AND BEING A FATHER WOULD HAVE BEEN ENOUGH.
ROSE AND I WERE DIVORCED WHEN SHE WAS VERY YOUNG.
WE FOUND HER A DECENT HOME.
WHEN SHE WAS OLD ENOUGH, SHE WENT TO A FIRST-CLASS FINISHING SCHOOL.
WELL, THAT'S EXPENSIVE.
WHO FOOTED THE BILL? ROSE DID.
HOW COULD YOU HAVE LOST TRACK OF HER? SHE SET UP SOME KIND OF TRUST.
MONEY WAS SENT TO JUNE EVERY MONTH.
I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM ROSE MYSELF IN OVER FOUR YEARS.
HOW DO YOU KNOW SHE DIDN'T TAKE OFF WITH THE FIVE MILLION? ROSE? YEAH.
NEVER.
SHE'S NOT THAT KIND.
SO JUNE NEVER LIVED WITH HER MOTHER? - NOT IN THE KIND OF HOUSE ROSE RAN.
- HOUSE? YOU MEAN THAT KIND OF HOUSE? - WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME BEFORE? - I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS IMPORTANT.
- ALL INFORMATION IS IMPORTANT.
- WELL, LET'S FACE IT.
THIS IS HOPELESS.
- THEY'VE GOT TOO BIG A LEAD.
- WE'LL TAKE A SHORTCU THROUGH VICE AND CORRUPTION.
SO WHY CALL ME? [ Colt ] BIG JACK, BRACE YOURSELF.
HOWIE REALLY HAS SKIPPED-- AND SO HAS JOE EDWARDS.
NOW, THAT MEANS A BUNDLE OF YOUR CASH AND MY TRUCK ARE ON THE LINE.
NOW, I NEED L.
A.
VICE TO FIND OUT SOMETHING FROM SAN DIEGO VICE.
YOU'VE GOT TO HELP.
HOW? - I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT VICE.
- YOUR FRIEND QUAID DOES.
I WOULDN'T ASK HIM FOR A FAVOR IF MY LIFE DEPENDED UPON IT.
LOOK, IT'S NOT YOUR LIFE.
IT'S YOUR MONEY.
[ Sighs ] ALL RIGHT, COLT.
WHERE CAN I REACH YOU? THERE IT IS.
ACCORDING TO THE DIVORCE RECORDS, THAT'S ROSE'S LAST KNOWN ADDRESS.
I TOLD YOU I'D DIG HER OUT.
THE QUESTION IS, DO THEY KNOW WHERE SHE'S GONE? WELL, LET'S FIND OUT.
UH, IT'S BEST WE KEEP A LOW PROFILE.
WHY DON'T YOU GO AHEAD AND SEE WHAT YOU CAN FIND OUT? RIGHT.
HERE'S SOME MONEY.
MIGHT HELP YOU GE THE INFORMATION.
I GOT IT HANDLED.
WHY DON'T WE PULL UP A LITTLE WAYS? WHY BE OBVIOUS? YOU WERE WONDERFUL.
SO WERE YOU.
UH, I HAVE SOMETHING I'D LIKE TO ASK YOU.
I'VE GOT THE ANSWER.
WHAT'S THE MATTER? UH, WELL, I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYPLACE QUITE LIKE THIS BEFORE.
YEAH, I SPOTTED THA RIGHT AWAY.
WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU? UH, IT'S BEEN FIVE YEARS SINCE-- OH.
SAY NO MORE.
LET'S TALK, UH, BUSINESS.
BUSINESS? YEAH.
OH.
HEY.
IF YOU COME THROUGH, THEN THERE'S GONNA BE 20 BUCKS IN IT FOR YA.
WOW.
REAL BIG SPENDER.
MAKE IT A HUNDRED AND I'LL GIVE YOU MORE THAN YOU EVER EXPECTED.
A HUNDRED? HOW? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I WANT.
TRUST ME.
A HUNDRED.
ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GO UP TO 40 BUCKS, BUT THAT'S IT.
GOOD-BYE.
UH, CLOSE THE DOOR BEHIND YOU.
HEY, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
SIXTY-SIX BUCKS.
THAT'S ALL I'VE GOT.
OKAY, COME ON.
YOU'RE KIND OF CUTE.
CAN'T WE STAY HERE? IT REALLY HAS BEEN FIVE YEARS, HASN'T IT? SO THIS WAS ROSE'S.
DOES JUNE KNOW? I GAVE HER THE PHONE NUMBER.
I THOUGHT YOU DIDN'T WANT HER TO KNOW WHO HER MOTHER WAS.
SHE DIDN'T.
I GAVE HER THE PHONE NUMBER IN CASE SHE GO IN TROUBLE, COULDN'T REACH ME.
THAT'S GREAT.
THEN THE NAVY FELLA KNOWS.
STAY HERE.
THIS SHOULDN'T TAKE LONG.
WHO'S THAT? THAT'S A BUSY LITTLE HOUSE.
[ Doorbell Rings ] WELL, WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU? OR IS THAT A SILLY QUESTION? UH, JUST BROWSING.
WHAT FOR? A FRIEND.
YOU FOUND ONE, LUCKY.
COME ON IN.
THIS IS, UH, NICE.
REAL NICE.
THANK YOU.
NO, NO.
WAIT A MINUTE.
HEY, YOU'VE GOT ME ALL WRONG.
- DO ANYTHING FOR YOUR COUNTRY, HUH, KID? - WELL, SURE I WOULD.
OH, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
I WAS LOOKING FOR ROSE BUTTERWORTH.
UH, WAS SHE IN THE BEDROOM? ALL RIGHT.
LET'S HAVE A VISI WITH MISS BUTTERWORTH.
I KEEP TELLING YOU, SHE'S NOT THERE.
JUNE! DAD.
- COLLINS! FORGET THE GIRL.
GET AFTER HIM.
- WHAT'S GOING ON, COLT? ALL RIGHT.
GET HIM.
INTO THE CAR.
LOOKS LIKE A CONVENTION.
- LET'S GO, KID.
- [ Woman ] WELL! [ Men Grunting ] MOVE IT! STAY WITH HER.
AH, JUST LIKE OLD TIMES.
EXCEPT I GOT FIVE YEARS AND A DISHONORABLE DISCHARGE AND YOU'RE A COMMANDER.
- WHAT ABOUT YOU, BATES, MAKE ADMIRAL? - I RESIGNED.
I OWN A SECURITY SYSTEM COMPANY.
YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE THE NUMBER OF CROOKED PEOPLE IN THE WORLD TODAY.
[ Horn Honks ] - TRUST THIS GUY? - OH, DAWSON.
ABSOLUTELY.
HE'S BEEN WITH ME FOR OVER TWO YEARS.
WE'VE SHARED A LOT TOGETHER-- AND SOON, FIVE MILLION DOLLARS.
- HE'S NOT GETTING ANY OF MY SHARE.
- OR MINE.
- I'VE BEEN THROUGH TOO MUCH.
- OH, WE ALL HAVE-- ESPECIALLY POOR JOE HERE.
[ Horn Honking ] HE'S A BULLDOG, SIR.
WITH YOUR PERMISSION, I'D LIKE TO TRY SOME EXTRAORDINARY MEASURES.
WHATEVER IT TAKES, DAWSON.
THEN WE CAN ALL GET DOWN TO SOME FACTS AND FIGURES.
[ Gunshots ] - ALL RIGHT.
LET'S GO! - [ Tires Squealing ] - [ June ] THIS WAS MY MOTHER'S? - SHE WANTED YOU TO HAVE IT.
IT'S BEEN IN YOUR FAMILY FOR OVER 200 YEARS.
ROSE ALWAYS LIKED OLD THINGS.
WAS SHE REALLY A MADAM? LOOK, KID, UH, YOU'RE GOING ABOUT THIS, UH, ALL THE WRONG WAY.
- WAS SHE? - JUNE, COLT'S RIGHT.
LET HER ANSWER.
WELL, SHE RAN THE PLACE.
I WONDER IF WE'LL EVER FIND OU WHAT SHE DID WITH THE MONEY.
MAYBE SHE TOOK HER SECRE WITH HER TO THE GRAVE.
SPEAKING OF WHICH.
- WHAT IS THIS? - A CLAIM CHECK-- SORT OF.
WHAT'S THIS FOR? YOUR MOTHER.
SO, MY ROOTS SEARCH IS OVER LIKE THIS.
ISN'T IT WONDERFUL? TAKE CARE OF HER, WILL YOU, KID? - I'LL MEET YOU BACK AT THE HOUSE.
- WHAT HOUSE? HOW MANY HOUSES DO YOU KNOW? UH, NO, NO, NO.
GO THE BACK WAY.
IT'LL BE SAFER.
LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING.
ARE YOU SURE HER ASHES ARE IN HERE? OF COURSE.
YOU SAW THEM GO IN? WELL, NO, BUT, WELL, WHY ELSE WOULD ANYONE GO TO THE TROUBLE? MY SENTIMENTS EXACTLY.
WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' HERE? ME.
NOW CAN I GO? I HAVE WORK TO DO, AND TIME IS MONEY.
I'LL TAKE THAT.
[ Chuckles ] THIS? THAT.
HERE.
- WHERE'D YOU LEARN TO HIT LIKE THAT? - I'M A BROWN BELT.
- YEAH, WELL, YOU'RE READY FOR BLACK.
- WELL, THANK YOU.
YOU THINK THE KEY IS IN HERE? WELL, LET'S FIND OUT.
NOT ME.
IT'S AGAINST MY RELIGION.
LOOK, I'M NOT GONNA DO IT.
GIVE IT TO HIM.
WELL, COME ON.
COME ON.
SOMEONE HAS TO.
GIVE IT TO ME.
- YOU WOULDN'T DESECRATE A GRAVE? - GRAVE? WHOSE? NOT ROSE'S.
WELL, THEN WHO IS IN THERE? ALL I KNOW IS ROSE WAS CREMATED AND I POURED HER ASHES OVER THE OCEAN FROM A BOAT.
- YOU'RE POSITIVE? - I OUGHT TO BE.
THE SEA WAS SO ROUGH I WAS SICK FOR DAYS.
WOULD YOU JUS GIVE IT TO ME, PLEASE? THANK YOU.
MR.
EDWARDS, TELL ME SOMETHING BEFORE THEY COME OU OF THE MAUSOLEUM.
IS THE ANSWER IN THERE? I DON'T KNOW.
YOU REALIZE YOU'RE IN A NO-WIN SITUATION? IF THEY FIND THE MONEY, THEY HAVE TO GET RID OF YOU.
IF THEY DON'T FIND THE MONEY, THEY'LL KILL YOU TRYING TO MAKE YOU TALK.
I'M YOUR ONLY WAY OUT.
[ Scoffs ] YOU? I'M WITH NAVAL INTELLIGENCE.
SO IS COLLINS.
THEY PUT ME UNDERCOVER WITH HIM TWO YEARS AGO.
THE NAVY WANTS THAT MONEY BACK.
I'M AUTHORIZED TO MAKE A DEAL.
HOW DO WE GET AWAY FROM COLLINS AND THE OTHERS? I DRIVE US AWAY.
THE NAVY PICKS THEM UP.
AND JUNE? SHE'LL BE FINE.
I PROMISE.
OKAY.
WE'VE GOT A DEAL.
ROSE WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF THE MONEY TILL I GOT OUT OF PRISON.
I DON'T KNOW WHA SHE DID WITH IT, BUT I FIGURE THE BEST PLACE TO START IS BACK AT THE HOUSE.
DEAL? DEAL.
[ Engine Starts ] ARE THESE ASHES HUMAN? - NO.
IT'S PAPER.
- WHERE'S THE RECORD ROOM? UH, DOWNSTAIRS, THE VAULT.
I WANT TO SEE ROSE BUTTERWORTH'S.
HERE.
THIS URN WAS PUT HERE FOR SAFEKEEPING BEFORE SHE DIED.
NOW HOW COME YOU DIDN' KNOW ABOUT IT? NO REASON TO.
IT WASN'T A BURIAL.
ALL RIGHT.
LET'S GO.
THAT'S JUST US.
OH, UH, Y-YOU CAN'T DO THAT.
THE DOOR DOESN'T OPEN FROM THE INSIDE.
NOBODY WILL EVER KNOW THAT WE'RE HERE.
IS IT TRUE? NO WAY OUT? NONE.
NONE.
- YOU SMOKE? - UH, NO.
I GAVE 'EM UP.
YOU DON'T WANT A CIGARETTE? NO, YOU GOT A MATCH? YEAH.
LET ME HAVE IT.
ALWAYS A WATER GAG.
[ Joe On Tape ] OKAY, WE'LL MAKE A DEAL.
ROSE WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF THE MONEY TILL I GOT OUT OF PRISON.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE DID WITH IT, BUT I FIGURE THE BEST PLACE TO START IS BACK AT THE HOUSE.
- [ Collins ] ALL RIGHT.
TURN IT OFF.
- YOU DOUBLE-CROSSING PUNK.
I CALL IT LOYALTY.
LET'S GO.
COME ON.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
[ Engine Starts ] DAWSON, IF ANY OF THE GIRLS GET SQUEAMISH, MAKE 'EM COMFORTABLE.
DAD.
- COME ON.
GET HER OUT OF HERE.
- COME ON.
COME ON.
COME ON.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
[ Sighs ] ALL RIGHT, JOE.
IT'S THE BOTTOM OF THE NINTH, TWO OUTS, TWO STRIKES, THE LAST PITCH.
- WHERE'S THE MONEY? - [ Laughs ] THAT'S JUST-- THAT'S JUST LIKE MY ROSE.
[ Laughing ] SHE'S ALWAYS-- ALWAYS DOING THE UNEXPECTED, YOU KNOW? [ Laughing ] I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE SHE HID THE MONEY.
SO, THIS URN MEANS NOTHING TO YOU, HUH? NOT A DAMN THING.
YOU TOLD DAWSON THE MONEY WAS HERE.
OH, COME ON, COLLINS.
I WAS IN INTELLIGENCE TOO.
YOU THINK I'D LET A YOUNG PUNK LIKE THAT FOOL ME? [ Collins ] DAWSON, GET JUNE OUT HERE.
- YOU LEAVE HER OUT OF THIS.
- OH, NO, NO, NO, JOE.
UH-UH.
YOU WANT TO OPEN A DOOR, YOU DON'T FORGET THE KEYS.
[ Howie Thinking ] ALL OF THESE ANTIQUES ARE REAL.
[ Allen ] DAWSON, YOU HEARD THE COMMANDER.
BRING HER IN HERE.
NO! [ Screams ] [ Punches Landing ] HEY.
[ Grunting ] DON'T USE THIS.
WHY NOT? I'LL TELL YOU LATER.
[ Groans ] [ Groaning ] WAIT.
RIGHT.
I'M ON YOUR SIDE.
WHA-- -WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME EARLIER? -I REALLY AM NAVAL INTELLIGENCE.
SORRY, ORDERS.
COME ON.
NOT ONE PIECE BROKEN.
KID, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? I FOUND THE MONEY.
YEAH, WELL, WHERE IS IT? YOU'RE STANDING ON IT.
A FIFTH-CENTURY PERSIAN RUG, WORTH ABOUT $80,000.
NOW YOU'RE SITTING ON IT.
WHAT? THAT'S AN ORIGINAL LOUIS XIV COUCH-- ABOUT $200,000.
SHE PUT ALL HER MONEY INTO ANTIQUES? YEAH.
I FIGURED IT OU WHEN I SAW THIS VASE.
IT'S AN ORIGINAL MING, WORTH ABOU TWO MILLION DOLLARS.
OH! [ Howie ] AND THEN THE TWO NAVAL INTELLIGENCE OFFICERS, ALLEN AND BATES, WERE WAITING FOR ME OUTSIDE OF THE JAIL.
THESE ARE TWO OF THE PHONY OFFICERS? NO.
ONLY BATES WAS PHONY.
ALTHOUGH FROM THE BEGINNING, IT SEEMED LIKE THEY WERE BOTH REAL.
WELL, HOW COULD YOU TELL THAT ONE OF THEM WAS A FAKE? HE SWITCHED SIDES IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FIGHT.
COLT AND I WERE BOTH SURPRISED.
OH, I'LL BET.
THEN THE TWO IN UNIFORM THA PICKED UP JUNE WERE BOTH BAD? RIGHT.
COLLINS MASTERMINDED THE WHOLE THING.
AND THIS GUY, DAWSON, TOLD JUNE'S FATHER THA HE WAS WORKING UNDERCOVER SO JUNE'S FATHER WOULD TELL HIM WHERE THE MONEY WAS HIDDEN, BUT HE REALLY WASN' WORKING UNDERCOVER.
HE WAS PHONY TOO.
UH, HOWIE, THIS IS GETTING REALLY CONFUSING.
WELL, NO, IT ISN'T.
I DON'T KNOW, HOWIE.
I THOUGHT I UNDERSTOOD IT ALL TILL YOU STARTED EXPLAINING IT.
ONE MORE TIME FROM THE TOP.
YOU SEE-- [ Door Opens ] HI, BABE.
DAD.
NOW, THAT'S THE REAL ONE? RIGHT.
UH, CAPTAIN ALLEN, THIS IS JODY BANKS.
HI.
HOW ARE YOU? IT'S ALMOST OVER, SWEETHEART.
THAT'S RIGHT, JUNE.
HE'LL BE COMPLETELY FREE AS SOON AS HE ISSUES A FORMAL STATEMEN TO NAVY INTELLIGENCE.
WHICH WE SHOULD BE DOING ABOUT NOW, JOE.
OH, CAN I GO WITH YOU? BABE, FROM NOW ON, YOU CAN GO ANYWHERE WITH ME.
AND THANKS TO YOU TWO, UH, IT LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE A CHANCE TO BE A FAMILY AGAIN.
JOE, COME ON.
I HOPE TO SEE YOU ALL AGAIN SOMETIME.
HEY, ANYTIME.
JUST CALL.
I'LL INTRODUCE YOU TO SOME MOVIE STARS.
OKAY.
THAT'S NICE.
SEEING THEM TOGETHER MAKES IT ALL WORTHWHILE, DOESN'T IT? YEAH.
WELL, THAT'S WHA BEING A FAMILY IS ALL ABOUT, KIDS.