The Goode Family (2009) s01e04 Episode Script

Helen's Back

- Che! No! - See, that's why he didn't touch his breakfast cabbage.
He's been holding out for a big fat yam.
Oh, hello Helen.
I heared I'll be judging you on the Organic Gardening Club Tour.
When are you going to stark getting ready? We've actually been working for weeks, Margo.
Oh, my mistake.
I feel awful.
The Garden Club will be here in three days, and I want in.
Everybody pop a salt tablet.
No more breaks.
Rain.
How did you do that? This is okay.
We can work through it.
More rain! Okay, let's not panic.
We can use this time to dress up the living room.
The Gardening Club is very selective, so we need to show how diverse and multicultural we are.
I wear italian jeans.
I'm from Africa.
Yeah.
But maybe something a little more Mahkiekin! What can be more carrying and multicultural than sponsoring a Burmese child for thirty ears? Dear Mahkiekin, here's another two dollars.
I'm so glad to hear most of your family made it through the monsoon.
Even your imaginary friend is depressing.
Mahkiekin is not imaginary.
This is perfect, we just need to clear a spot.
Some place high, where everyone can see it.
Like a beacon! Let me help you.
Mom is dead, just like Bambi.
Mom's all better.
My back! The Goode Family - Season 01 Episode 04 - "Helen's Back" Easy now.
Relax and let this healing compress soothe away your aches .
It smells! My purging compost.
- There's a reason for that - I'm not giving up! Just relax.
We'll handle everything.
I'll take care of the household and Ubuntu and Bliss - will take care of the shopping.
- Cool! Oh, easy now.
We are on a supe r-tight budget this month.
In fact, I'm going to start making our toothpaste.
- Oh great: carey breath.
- What about the garden? - Well, ehm - Gerald, this is our shot! We need to hire a gardener.
Helen, we don't hire people to do our work.
It's elitist and classist.
Do you think Al Gore has a staff of people helping him? I'm not talking about the staff.
Hey, I brought some painpills for your back.
Well, that's sweet of you, but Helen never uses artificial painkillers.
You know, those pink ones look pretty natural.
Helen, stop.
We'll hire a gardener.
My suggestion is you get yourself some of them not so legals.
Find one with a noisy backpack, that's called a leafblower, it's a sign of status.
So you make the deal with him.
I can't hire a crew of latino gardeners.
I feel like some sort of Conquistador! Gerald, we have to hire somebody.
Ok, but we are not hiring any minorities to do our dirty work.
That's racist! It's whites only at the Goode house.
You know what this is? - Dad's purse.
- It's more than that.
This is our chance to make some financial decisions for ourselves.
Come on, there must be something you want.
No more landmines? Safe Non Toxic Non Reactive Poison Free.
Only $19.
99 If I get you (??? ) will you promise not to lose it? No! Ok, and when these are gone, we are going to have a conversation.
No, we're not.
Look, no poison! This is totally dented.
You gonna have to pay for it.
We can't pay for it.
We won't have enough money to buy dad's Flaxseed waffle mix.
But that's keeps it regular.
We need money.
- You gonna guys trade up.
- Year, trade up! What's that? This guy started with a paper clip and trade it for a pen, Then he kept on on trading till he ended up with a house.
I'm gonna trade this pick to a recording studio.
Greenville Yardworks Andrew's Organic Gardening Ah White! I tried to trade the bottle for Ray's house.
He said no.
We need to work our way up.
Everybody the gardener is here! Thank God! And he is As the driven snow, Helen.
What? Excuse me, men there seems to have been some sort of misunderstanding I'm sure you all very talented, but I hired Andrew to do my gardening.
Yeah, we work for him.
So what you want from us to do? Oh, nothing, nothing, I wouldn't dream of insulting your dignity by telling you what to do, no! That's why I specifically hired a white gardener.
So you firing us? - Because we not white? - No! No, no, no, no.
Well, yes but Give me a second here I know this somehow makes sense Look, we really need this job! Andrew does not pay us if we don't work! Well it sounds like Andrew is exploiting you Look, I really need help with my garden, and you really need work Why don't I hire you directly.
And pay you directly.
All of it.
No Andrew.
Very good.
I feel like I've really done something positive for the men.
You should see the great job they did on the garden! Thats great, Gerald oh! You know what will make you feel better? Cleaning out your system.
I'll get up some Flaxseed waffles, nature's brewn.
No! Mail! Burma? Letter from Mahkiekin! Oh, let me see it! Mahkiekin is escaping from the Myanmar and she's going to visit us! We finally going to meet! And will get to harbor a refugee! Almost no one gets to do that! That's wonderful! I can't wait.
Let's see It took three months just for the letter to get gere She is about the size of ten letters, so I am Mahkiekin! Mahkiekin! It's so wonderful to see you! I'll give you a hug, if I wasn't in an excruciating pain from a back injury! No oh, oh - Oh, that's much better.
- I fix! Oh, God! That's amazing.
Your fingers are so gentle, yet powerful Strong like bull! Oh, Mahkiekin, I just wish this was a better time for a visit I'll wait outside.
Gerald? And this, of course, is the rest-room.
Indoor shower? Hot water? Yeah, that's a waste of energy though, so we don't use it.
There's a rainwater shower outside.
Micro-wave! Only General have this.
I can't wait! It's not plugged in, we use it as a breadbox.
I'm sorry, this place is a bit of mess.
I'll scrub.
- You don't have to do that - I'll scrub! I'm gonna try to trade the water bottle for three Bob Marley t-shirts.
How is this gonna give us dad waffle mix? We flip it! Trading up is the new economy.
Get on board, or get left in the dirt! Hey, is that a glow in the dark yo-yo? You know, I thought it was a horrible time for Mahkiekin to be here, but she is God send, she has been so helpful around the house.
I know, and she is so grateful to you.
You can see it in the way she carries you to the car.
Hey! You've got a hobo squatting in your shed outside! Where's you fire extinguisher? I'll roust her.
In the shed? - Sorry I sleep! - No, it's ok We're are not mad, but we made up Bliss's trundle for you.
Likey here! Very good! Very much! We can't let her sleep in a potting shed.
But we can't impose our western notion of comfort on her.
Making her sleep inside, on the bed, will be cultural imperialism.
Good point.
Ola, muchachos! What brings you here? You day is "miercoles".
We need work.
Andrew always finds us work.
- Maybe we need Andrew.
- No, no, no, you don't need Andrew.
I will save you from all that.
Could you get'em to knock down that bee hive too? Muchachos! The bee hive, rapido! Fellas! For gas.
God, my back feel so much better.
Thanks to you.
So much meat! We don't eat meat.
'Course not Omega 4? I'll try it on Kent.
Margo, we're so excited about this gardening club tour.
Me and my guest, Mahkiekin.
Mahkiekin is a refugee from Myanmar.
Have you ever had a refugee guest Margot? How did you get one? I'm on a list! No hydrogen car, now this! Is your friend unhappy? Yes! I've really think she is Mahkiekin.
Oops, little dirt You know, Mahkiekin, not to get all Uncle Sam on yiu but you really should sweep up the potting shed, if you gonna sleep there.
I can give you this sylph or the sprite I can't give both, they will kill me.
Ok! I'll do it! Oh, what a rush! I heared the rumours about trash can full of doorknobs wait right here.
Flaxseed Waffle mix I have sylph and sprite.
Trade for waffle mix? I traded for waffle mix, we did it! Are you out of the freaking mind? I had us a (trifle clock) that's less than four moves away from a classic euro scooter! For sale No, we have the waffle mix, we have to get home for the tour.
But I'm on a roll, and the bulls are hot! Are you sure we ready? Tour-ready? Relax, we have everything all under control.
My boys are hard workers.
Rapid up muchachos, it's almost Tour time! Sure feels good to empower people.
It's the greatest buzz ever.
Party food ready.
I also bring you lemonade to refresh.
Ehm lemonade is good, but what was that juice you made the another day? Cucumber? - Is any more of that? - I squeeze some.
As long as it's no trouble She does so much, do you think we should pay her? - Gerald! - You're right I keep trying to impose my western values on her.
Oh, you've got yourself quite a plantation here.
He's so insensitive.
That's something you don't joke about.
Ah, I know, the plantaitons where horrible.
When I think of the indignities, those people suffered the slaves, not the owners No, the owners just set on their verandas, drinking cucumber juice, while the slaves toiled under the hot sun.
Did I just say cucumber juice? Oh, mister Gerald! I work all day and sleep in shed.
Gerald I'm a slave owner.
I'm a conquistador! Next stop the Goodes.
Hippy neighbourhood, so leave no valuables in the van.
Organic Gardening Club The Garden Tour.
We need to gabber up you crew and I need to Row Mahkiekin up in a rug.
Sorry I'm late.
Ubuntu, take the gardeners round back and over to Ray's.
Now! Gardeners! Helen, we can't roll Mahkiekin up in a rug, that's compounding the problem.
We need to hide her! Oh, Bliss can take her for a makeover.
Where is Bliss? It's too late! Quick, big smiles! Where is your Burmese refugee? I don't know it's all like I keep tabs on her.
She's probably enjoying her freedom somewhere.
I'll go look.
So Mahkiekin, are you there? Crap! So, Helen really must be cracking the weep.
- Literally? - No time.
Must serve noodle wraps.
Or else Helen will Professor Montoya, I would love to know, what a connoisseur such as yourself thinks of our garden.
I must tell you, I am completely and utterly faithful to my own garden, but those have got to be the sexiest eg g-plan I have ever seen.
How did you ever achieved this? Well, hard work our hard work Mister Gerald! I know you don't like us to use your water, but No, no, I don't like you to waste water when you come to the Tour as my guest.
Mister Gerald! I can only carry 5 trays Oh, look, it's our house guest and family friend Mahkiekin.
Here, let me take those.
No! Strong like bull! The appressed servant was bad enough, but the gardening group too? I thought it was your hard work Wow it hurts to say this but exploiting immigrant labour isn't what small scale organic farming is about.
Am I right? So, has everyone met the Burmese refugee I rescued? More like indentured.
That's absurd! I hurt my back, she' been helping out with a little cooking, cleaning Yes! Sewing, ironing massaging, painting nails She did my toes once, I couldn't reach them! And I assume, you're getting paid at least I no get paid, I sleep in shed.
This is horrifying.
I have only one question Do we call Immigration, or is this more of the Justice Department issue? Helen, in America people get paid for their work Unless they trade up.
Trade up? Like paper clip for a house.
We tried to trade That is what Mahkiekin was obviously doing.
- I've been meaning to do that myself.
- I heared it's the new economy.
What could she possibly have been trading up for? Her freedom? No This classic motor-scooter.
That Mahkiekin know it will make her the envy of all her friends.
She'll never have to ride the bus again.
with the goth kids or the theater dorks.
You're right! Flax Waffle mix never would affect slavery problem.
Yeah I feel great.
I think it is loveable.
So, cut the edge, yet so sensitive of you to use a barter system.
Ok, fine, she's trading up, but could someone explain to me why it is okay to exploit this latino yard crew to do their dirty work? Latino? My friend, I'm afgani, and these two are romanians.
What? What were you thinking, Margo? How could you assume that these men where latino? That one's wearing a leafblower So I guess because I don't have a leafblower, I must not be latino.
Because I am a professor of psychology, I must be a jew.
But this is not about me, it's about you! And you're dispicable racisism! No, no, Margo is not a bad person, she just had bad thoughts, maybe she could use some sensitivity training.
Maybe we all could.
I was just confessing the same thing to my nanny.
I guess we should be moving on now.
But we've learned so much from this house, it should be a permanent feature on the Garden Tour.
Welcome to the Club! Mister Gerald, you good man, but we are a client-based now, so we don't need you anymore.
Oh thank God.
But why did you let me believe you were latino? Ah, people seem comfortable with it.
Well, my back is all better, so there will be no moreworking from you, Mahkiekin.
Ok, just wrap up microwave.
And leave bread inside!
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