The Madame Blanc Mysteries (2021) s02e08 Episode Script

Christmas Special 2023

Do you remember the first time
That my eyes set on you
Your smile came from nowhere
For some time never
Or sometime soon
The road is a long one
I was only passing through
I was only passing through. ♪
Merry Christmas!
- Ready for an adventure?
- Yeah. Where we off to again?
My friend Lydia owns a beautiful
little hotel in the mountains,
and she wants us
to come in as partners.
So I said to her, "Entertain me
and all my friends for the night,
- "and we'll think about it."
- Ooh, I'm excited.
Yes, they're doing
a murder mystery night.
Oh, no, no. You kept that quiet.
Oh, don't be such a grinch.
It'll be a laugh.
I totally agree, Jean, and I know
Lydia's gone to a lot of trouble.
You see, Lydia, I like.
But I'm not too keen on the husband, Martin.
Absolute sleazebag.
The hotel is also
meant to be haunted.
Some poor madwoman
shot herself in the garden,
and, apparently,
her spirit has never left.
Oh, whatever you do,
don't tell Gloria.
- You know what she's like about ghosts.
- Yeah.
- Hiya.
- Oh, hello, love.
Where's Where's Cooper?
Oh, he's had to go back
to the States.
- His mum's not well.
- Oh, nothing serious, I hope.
Nothing that can't be sorted.
Think she was just missing her baby.
- I know how that feels.
- Yeah, we both do.
- Right, come on. Let's get going.
- No, no, we're waiting for Caron.
What, you
You've invited Andre?
Good grief, no.
It was Dominic's idea.
Well, it's this time last year
when he lost his wife,
and I thought it might be nice
if he could come.
I mean, Christmas must be awful
for him now.
Oh, talk of the devil.
Look at you!
Haven't seen you
in normal ish clothes.
Where are we going again?
A hotel in the mountains.
I'll explain on the way.
You're in with me and Jean
in Madeline.
- It's about an hour away.
- In Madeline?
Maybe we could use my police car
as it's uphill.
Madeline will be absolutely fine,
thank you very much.
Come on, ladies.
Now, it's a bit of a squeeze,
but you'll manage.
- There we go.
Only an hour or so.
In you get.
Absolute luxury.
Let's get going.
Where would you like your tea, sir?
Where I always have it, Johnson.
Will that be all, sir?
- What's that? Is that milk?
- English breakfast tea, sir.
- I asked for chamomile.
- Sorry, sir.
Oh, leave it.
How long, darling?
Do we need to stop for refreshments?
We've only been on the road
for ten minutes, darling.
It's only an hour or so,
so let's just push through, eh?
- Lydia?
- What do you want? I'm busy.
I have a very important evening
to prepare for
if we've any chance of Judith
and Jeremy investing.
- Yes. I am aware of that.
- You know this is our last chance?
And you know whose fault that is,
And that, dear,
is why I'm trying to fix it.
There's no way that Lloyd James will
invest on the outgoings we have now.
- Something has to give.
- Like what?
We have to let Johnson go.
Oh, we inherited the old fossil
I'm not sure. He does, what? Cooking
and serving as well as reception.
I've drafted a termination letter.
But you're right.
We do need him tonight.
We'll serve it on him tomorrow
when the guests have gone.
Ah. You must be
our murder mystery actors.
And you must be Madame Harris?
It is a pleasure to meet you.
I'm Yves, and these are my fellow
performers, Lea and Brigette.
- Bonjour.
- Bonjour.
Well, you come
very highly recommended.
Tonight is a very important night,
so we're pleased you're here.
Ah, we are very honoured to be here.
We are the best in the business
and won't disappoint you.
Darling, the key.
Is there anything you require
as part of the performance?
No, madame,
we come entirely self-contained
to provide a wonderful evening
of mystery and murder.
Oh, how splendid.
Jolly good. Right then. Johnson?
Johnson? Oh, where is the man?
Ah. Johnson, show the actors
to their room
and get them some refreshments?
This way.
It's gonna be a huge storm tonight,
I can feel it in my bones.
- Oh, yeah? What bone's that, then?
- The big toe on his right foot.
When it aches,
we know there's going to be a storm.
He's usually pretty accurate.
And when did you discover this
miraculous toe-shaped weather vane?
Oh, it's much more
than a weather vane, Dominic.
I discovered my rather unusual
talent in my childhood, actually.
My father never once
stepped on a golf course
without consulting me first.
- Wow, that is handy, innit?
- Oh, yes.
There will be a storm tonight,
old chap.
'Ey, nobody mentioned
to bring waterproofs.
You don't believe that rubbish, do you?
I mean, look at that sky.
- Hardly a cloud.
- Hmm.
You all right?
Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.
- Lovely view, in't it?
- Yeah, beautiful.
How dare you fill my hotel
with so many beautiful women!
Hello, you two, you look like
you've been working hard.
Preparing for your visit.
- Jeremy.
- Hello, Martin.
Lydia, good to see you.
And you must be Gloria and Jean.
- I'm Gloria.
- I'm Jean.
Forgive me. All this glamour
makes me a little giddy.
Let's see which rooms you're
staying in. Come with me, ladies.
So, four double rooms
have been booked.
Oh, no, that's not right.
We were told there were
two couples and two singles.
Oh, dear,
I must've written it down wrong.
We only have
four double rooms available.
Three of our other rooms
are under renovation,
and we need one room for the actors.
Oh, I can't share,
not with my hot flushes.
Well, what we gonna do?
- Well, Dom could share with Jeremy.
- Oh.
Then Caron and Gloria
can have their own rooms,
then I'll stay with you, Jean.
It's only for a night.
And I'm only little.
- Yeah.
- That's all sorted, then.
Be like being back at Harrow
without the beatings, eh, Dom?
Yeah, just like that.
Isn't she wonderful?
Come on, old chap.
- I've got the key.
- OK.
No, It's just around here, look.
It's up these stairs.
Hey, I loved her scarf.
Yeah. Oh, girls, I've left my bag
in reception. I won't be a minute.
All right, then. Oh.
- Oh, do you want a hand?
- No, I'm fine.
No, let me help you
with that big one.
- No, it's fine.
- No, look, come on, Gloria.
You can't do them both.
I can, I'm fine! You're all right,
it's bigger than you.
Do you want me to hold that chair
for you? Looks precarious.
No, I'm fine.
Er, hi, hello.
I'm Johnson the butler, by the way.
Just getting some cutlery down
for tonight.
Mrs Harris likes to have everything
just so
for the murder mystery night.
Great, well, I'll see you later,
- Room looks lovely, by the way.
- I'm glad somebody appreciates it.
- Oh, lovely.
- Thank you so much, Johnson.
Oh, here's the actors. Oh, look.
You're keeping all the handsome guys
to yourself.
They're all yours.
Hi, handsome.
My name is Cindy Savage.
What's yours?
- Andre Caron.
- Oh, French. How exotic.
What about you, big boy?
What's your name?
- Dom Dom Dominic.
- Oh, you're English.
Er, kind of. I'm from Stoke, so
I couldn't help but notice
your very long legs, Dom.
- May I call you Dom?
- Yeah.
- I can't hear you, Dom.
- Yeah, you can call me Dom.
I would guess that those long legs
are really good for running.
Oh, I don't really do much running.
I do driving.
Oh. Now, suppose I wanted to get out
of somewhere quickly?
Why would that be necessary?
I'm just saying,
if I needed to escape,
you could be
my perfect partner in crime.
- Oh, silly me! What did I say?
- You said the word crime.
You could sweep me up
and carry me into the sunset.
- What is she talking about?
- She's dropping clues.
Come on, roomie. Let's have a dance.
Oh, well, actually, I'm OK,
but I'm sure Dom would love to.
I think you would find
I was here first.
Let's ask Dominic to choose,
shall we?
Oh, I need the loo. What a shame.
Are there any toilets
on this floor, Judith?
Left out of here.
Left again, and then right
at the end of the corridor.
And the door is opposite
the Monti bust.
Thank you, Cindy Savage.
No, don't
I'm dying to know
what a Monti bust is.
You don't say anything
to my wife.
- Please.
- Look, I'll pay you
Oh, sorry. I was looking for
the Monti bust, whatever that is.
OK, I'll leave you to, erm
Oh, that's a Monti bust.
- CARON: I'm not sure what you expect.
Hey, you'll never guess
what I just seen.
Oh! Here we go.
- Oh, here we are.
- Tell you in a minute.
Ladies and gentleman,
boys and girl.
Welcome to the Sanguinet Club.
Hello, handsome.
- Ooh!
I'm afraid I have
some very bad news for you.
- Oh, dear.
- ALL: Ooh!
I bet my news is worse than yours.
Don't you come in here
playing the big man.
I know you stole my money.
He stole your money too?
- Why, I ought to
- The worst thing I ever did
was getting involved
with you two broads.
Well, you're going to pay, lover.
- Oh!
- What have you done?
You mean what have YOU done?
The road to the hotel
has been flooded by the storm.
We are on our own.
I will need your help.
I am Inspector Caron.
I demand that everyone
stays exactly where they are.
And please turn out your pockets
and handbags.
Whoever did this
is still in the room.
You will now all be searched,
one at a time.
Please cooperate.
These unusual circumstances
require unusual measures.
Er, Caron, you might want
to take a look at that.
No, this is not a real gun.
- This is a pop gun.
- It's the one we always use.
- He's right.
- This would not have killed anyone.
Sir, maybe it might be an idea
to get everyone
a whisky for their nerves.
Of course, but I would like you
to be accompanied.
I-I don't mind giving him a hand.
We could rustle up
some food as well.
Before you go,
do you have a tablecloth here?
I shall set up an incident room
in the reception area.
Dom, if you could take everyone
through to the morning room
to wait until I have had
a chance to question them.
Of course.
If you'd like to follow me through,
Jean, if you could take photos
of the crime scene,
- but please do not touch anything.
- No, of course not.
Judith's keeping charge
in the morning room.
Now, why was Martin
pointing at this painting?
It's called Queen Marie Antoinette
Of France
And Her Two Children
Walking In The Park At Trianon.
- Wow. Snappy title (!)
Also known as The Doomed Queen.
Oh. That's catchier.
It's by Adolf Ulrik Wertmuller,
a very famous Rococo artist.
- Is it worth much?
- Oh, this is a copy.
I just wondered why,
why he was pointing at it.
Let me do some notes and then bring
those dreadful actors in first.
She's got a look of Joan Sims.
We're on the board
of our local theatre.
Oh, really?
Well, I say board, we're now more
the primary shareholders, aren't we?
What kind of production?
I played Joan of Arc
a couple of years ago.
- Ah! My dream role.
- In French?
Australian. It was a reworking
of the original text.
Sold out for the entire run,
- weren't we, darling?
- Mm.
- Must have been VERY emotional.
- Oh, it really was.
And how long was the run?
Three nights.
- Theatre runs in my blood, you see.
- Really?
Oh, yes.
The business of show is something
that has always really beckoned me.
I'm not one for name-dropping, but I
was in Shirley's Shakers, you know.
We were very big
in the East Midlands.
I would have worked
all round the world
if it wasn't for my dropped arches.
Oh, now, darling!
Erm, Caron would like to speak
to the actors now, please.
Oh, them.
So we have Lea E'Mile,
Yves Cordon and Brigette.
How do you all know each other?
- ALL:
- We
After you, my love.
Myself and Yves met at Cours Florent
years ago.
Wow! Cours Florent.
What an amazing drama school.
It is.
- When were you there?
- Er 2009, 2010?
Can we concentrate, please?
- Of course.
- Sorry.
And you, Brigette?
It is my first time
with this company.
I was in between jobs,
and the audition came up.
And none of you
had ever met Mr Harris before?
Well, that, that's not quite true,
though, is it?
Well, when I popped to the toilet,
I saw you and Martin holding hands
and chatting.
Sorry, I tried to tell you, and
then they burst into action and
Well? Brigette?
I had only been on a few dates
with Martin.
And no,
I had no idea he was married.
I was shocked when I found out
he had a wife.
How did you meet?
I had no reason to kill him.
Even if he did lie on his social media.
If this is true, I will need to see
your messages on this dating app,
and personally to Martin.
E-Excuse me.
They were gonna sack Johnson?
- Yeah.
Oh, my God. Gloria!
Come back here! Oi!
All right. Uh-uh.
- He just dumped these on me and ran!
- Did he indeed?
Why did you make a run for it?
Did you know about this?
I heard them talking
about firing me,
but this is the first time
I've seen it in print.
How long have you
worked for the Harrises?
Over 30 years.
My previous boss was a lovely man.
Treated me with such dignity
and kindness.
What happened to him?
He died. Of a heart attack,
leaving his wife
and little girl behind.
And stricken with grief and
depression, she took her own life,
on that very terrace.
The day I saw that poor little child
walk down the drive alone
..was the worst day of my life.
Martin took over not so long after,
and has been beyond vile to me
ever since.
I only stayed because of Lydia.
But I am not a murderer.
I disagree.
I know you did it.
And I know where you hid the gun.
Come with me.
Jean, that is a crime scene.
You cannot go in again.
Trust me.
OK. Quickly.
You see,
you laid silver cutlery, not gold.
I think I know
where you hid the gun.
Money? You stole from them?
No. It is what I am owed.
I deserve much more.
We will have more questions,
but for now,
Dom will take you
back to the morning room.
- Come on.
- Lydia, wait!
I know she's told you everything.
- So you think it's me who killed him?
- I beg your pardon!
I haven't said a word about your
alley cat of a husband, actually.
Please calm down, madam.
Look, I know husband has had affairs
most of his life,
but here is something
you don't know.
The last little filly he had was 24
and managed to wangle 50,000 euros
out of him.
That's why
we needed your investment.
I had every reason to kill him,
but then I discovered
he'd cashed in his life insurance,
so that wasn't even an option
for me.
You see, he was worth more
alive to me than dead.
At least I still have the hope
that you might invest.
But now, I have nothing. I
I-I can't even afford to bury him.
- God!
please get the rest of them in here.
Can you all come in here, please?
Ladies and gentlemen
Can we go now? We've got another
booking to prepare for tomorrow.
This is a murder investigation.
Also, the floods have blocked
the road. No-one is going anywhere.
And may I remind you that a man
has lost his life this evening.
I would like you all to go
back to your respective rooms,
lock your doors and keep
your phones on at all times.
I have all of your numbers.
As soon as back-up arrives,
I will let you know.
Dreadfully traumatised
at what happened this evening.
But having a girls' night
is rather exciting, isn't it?
So, where did you meet Lydia?
Oh, we worked at the same office
together in London many moons ago.
Shall I let you
into a little secret?
Oh, go on.
- But you mustn't tell Jeremy.
- Oh, are you sure you wanna tell me?
Martin worked at the same office,
- I knew him very well.
- Oh, right.
I mean very, very well.
Oh, right.
Oh, he was devastatingly handsome.
And a phenomenal lover.
- OK.
- But an absolute cad.
I mean, I dropped him, of course,
when I found out what a bounder
he was. And then he got with Lydia.
Well, I guess what Jeremy
doesn't know can't hurt him.
Exactly. Poor old Lydia, though.
Martin never changed
his alleycat ways.
Mind you, he was quite discreet
at the country club. We all knew.
Still, I suppose
it doesn't matter now, does it?
No. No, I suppose it doesn't.
- What about a cheeky gin nightcap?
- Oh!
Judith, is that an Ergo hip flask?
I've not seen one of those for ages.
That won the British Design Award
in 1986. I love them!
Oh, I don't know what it is,
Jeremy bought it for my birthday
that year,
and I've never been caught short
Thought I locked that door.
Erm Judith, erm
make mine a large one.
Oh, wow. Those are class.
Really beautiful.
Now, to be honest, Dominic,
I usually sleep in the buff.
But I'm gonna make an exception
for you.
That's a lovely mental image,
thank you.
- WOMAN: Let me in! Let me in!
There is a murderer
wandering around.
You're not supposed
to leave your room!
Oh. Stopping, then, are you?
Good grief.
Who would have thought it, eh?
A thunderstorm, a murder, and
let's not forget about the ghost.
Ghost? What ghost?
Nobody mentioned a ghost.
Host. I meant host.
- Host.
- A poor, murdered host.
Dom, I'm really frightened.
It's all right, look,
I know you are, Glo.
Look, go back to your room, lock
the door and I will FaceTime you.
- Promise?
- Promise.
All right. All right, don't worry.
BOTH: Ooh!
Erm Would you like
to use the bathroom first?
Probably best.
- I need to exfoliate.
- Oh.
I said the blue one, dear.
- What are you doing?!
- Just trying to get your attention.
- What, by scaring me half to death?
- Sorry. What are you doing up?
I couldn't sleep.
I had to have a look around.
Everything's spinning round
in my head.
I just couldn't bear
the night talking.
Lord knows
what goes on in Jeremy's head.
No, no, no, don't turn that on,
we'll wake everyone up.
I've got my phone on me.
- Right.
- Right.
Just so I can see where I'm going,
you know?
Oh, right.
Well, they all seem a bit dodgy
to me, to be honest.
You can say that again.
There's something bugging me.
Now, Lea and Yves said they went
to the best drama school in France,
- but they're blooming terrible!
- I know.
I am gonna check the roll call
for that drama school.
Right. OK.
No sign of 'em.
There's something about Lea's name
that I can't put my finger on.
..our strongest suspects
are Lydia and Johnson. Correct.
Lydia, well, Martin's cheated
on her over and over again.
Maybe Lydia found out about Brigette
and just thought, "Enough's enough."
Yeah, but what about Brigette?
We don't know that she didn't have
any feelings for Martin, do we?
Well, they did seem very intense
when I saw them together.
Well, maybe, her fellow actors
Whoa, let's use that term
very loosely.
Huh! Well, maybe they helped her
hide the murder weapon.
But how?
Caron searched everyone
and everywhere,
and it's like that murder weapon
just disappeared into thin air.
- Mm.
- Oh!
I'll tell you what, though,
this place probably
- Ooooh!
- Ooh!
- It's all right.
- It's only the storm.
- Yeah.
That's exactly what they say
in horror films
before the fellow with the chainsaw
appears wearing his mam's blouse.
I've got a hunch.
Go on.
- We have to go in the dining room.
- Are you mad?
- Yeah, we have to.
- There's a dead body in there!
Please, Dom.
Yeah, and as Caron said,
it is a crime scene.
Yeah, I know it is,
but I'll put my gloves on.
Right, I'm off.
- This is too creepy for me. No
- No. No. Dom
Dom, just please, just give me a minute,
give me a minute.
Look. Right. So
..he was pointing at that painting.
What was he pointing at it for?
It's Rococo, it's just a print,
it's nothing special.
Oh. I wonder
Dom, hold this
and point it at the painting.
- Murder weapon.
- Oh, my God!
Help! Help!
What on Earth is wrong?
- He's alive, Andre!
- What do you mean?
He's not looking too chipper, but
he's just thrown off the tablecloth.
What are you talking about?
He's not alive. It-It was the wind.
It forced the window open, and
it blew the tablecloth off Martin.
Am I to understand that you just
entered the crime scene again?
Yeah, yeah,
I know we shouldn't have,
but, erm,
we found the murder weapon.
The murder weapon? But I searched
that room high and low.
- Where was it?
- Behind a secret panel.
OK, let me get my head round this.
Let's get some lights on.
Yeah. Yeah.
"Established 1987."
Caron, I think I know who did this.
I would like to thank you all
for your cooperation
and support in the last 24 hours.
My colleague would like to say
a few words.
Thank you, Andres.
Now, all three of you had a motive.
Johnson, you knew Martin
was going to let you go.
When I disturbed you
in the dining room,
you weren't reaching up for cutlery.
No, you were hiding stolen cash.
..I don't think you killed him.
..we now know
that you were dating Martin.
How do we know
how serious your relationship was?
I didn't know he was married.
And I certainly
wouldn't have killed him for it.
- Oh, he was very married.
- Indeed, Lydia.
If anyone had the strongest motive,
it'd be you.
So much betrayal.
Well, it would be enough for anyone
to want revenge.
But like you said,
why would you kill someone
who was worth more alive
than they were dead?
looks like there's nobody left.
Apart from you two. Yves.
Lea. But what possible motive
would you have to murder Martin?
We did it?
Oh, yes.
Yes, it was definitely you two.
Do you remember that painting
hanging up in the dining room,
the one that Martin pointed to
when he was shot, mm?
Well, that's a very famous Rococo
painting called The Doomed Queen.
But it wasn't the subject matter
that gave me the clue.
No, it was WHEN it was painted.
You see, in the rococo period,
morals were, er,
how shall we say? Loose.
And bed-hopping
was just part of life.
But how did those young aristocrats
get away with it in polite society?
'By leaving messages in fake walls.
'And sneaking
through secret passages.
'Martin wasn't
pointing at the painting.
'He was trying to tell us
where the murder weapon was hidden.'
This is how I see it.
Yves came through to the dining
room with a pop gun, and Lea,
you took your position near Martin.
Hello, handsome.
When Brigette turned the lights off,
on cue, there was a huge fuss,
and Lea, you shot Martin
at exactly the same time
that Yves fired his pop gun.
When you pretended to die,
you slipped the murder weapon
under the table, and Yves,
you quickly secreted it
in the hidden panel,
just before the lights came on.
Martin saw all this
in his dying moments
and he tried to tell us
where the gun was.
Lea, I'd suspected
you'd been here before.
No, I hadn't.
But you told Dom
where the bathroom was,
and you mentioned the Monti bust,
The Veiled Lady by Raffaele Monti.
A copy, obviously.
But giving precise directions,
well, that's a tad specific
for someone who is staying in a room
on the other side of the hotel
and claims they've never been here
You also said you met
at Cours Florent,
so I looked at the records
from 2009 to 2010.
You were never there. So why lie?
Lea, I think you blurted out the
first thing that came into your head
to try and cover up
who you really are.
You see, when I was typing in
your name, something rang a bell.
And then it came to me
when I saw the sign in reception.
Established 1987,
M Mile,
but there's an apostrophe
in front of the surname.
So I realised
that there was a letter missing,
and on closer inspection,
'I discovered that the missing
letter was the letter E.
'So it should have read M E'Mile.'
That's your name, isn't it, Lea?
Lea E'Mile.
Now, I think M E'Mile
was your father.
And you were the poor child
who tragically lost her mother
when she took her own life,
but what on Earth
did Martin do to you
to make you murder him
in cold blood?
I did live here.
When I was a child.
My father,
he died of a heart attack,
and my very vulnerable,
grief-stricken mother
was seduced by Martin.
She was lost without my father
and Martin seemed like the knight
in shining armour she needed.
He helped her run this place,
but had to keep her a secret
because he was married.
He finally convinced her
to sign the hotel over
on the promise he was going to
leave Lydia and make a commitment.
Only one week later,
three days before Christmas,
we got served eviction papers.
I saw my beautiful, heartbroken
mother walk into that very terrace
and kill herself
in front of my very eyes.
When we got the booking, all those
feelings came flooding back.
That's when we got the idea.
You must really love her, Yves assist in murder.
I assume it was you who wrote
the threatening letter?
I did what I had to do.
Sorry, something's bothering me.
If you knew where
the murder weapon was last night,
why didn't you just come down
and get it?
We did try and get it.
you and Jean stopped us.'
- 'Hello?'
The road is open again.
Back-up will be here in ten minutes.
Hey, Jeremy, it might be more useful
if that toe of yours
could predict a murder
rather than the weather.
My Auntie Mavis used to predict
the bingo with her arthritis.
Oh, fascinating. Did she win?
Yeah, bought herself a penthouse
in Marbella.
You were brilliant in there.
Oh! Thank you.
You were quite the detective yourself.
- Hey, at least no-one saw the ghost.
- No, no. No.
- I'll take that for you.
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