The Magicians (2016) s05e08 Episode Script

Garden Variety Homicide

Previously on "The Magicians" I see blood on the walls.
I hear its voice.
It wants out.
Have you tried letting it out? Charlton? I once was possessed by the Monster too.
When all the scary creatures were pulled out, I held on tight as I could in your happy place.
I found this in Q's stuff at Brakebills.
Professor? I mean Dean Adiyodi? Yeah, come in.
What did you do with Fogg 17? I call that one Psycho Fogg.
Put him in the clean room.
He can't cast there, so.
I can't do what I need to do if I'm worried about how it's gonna affect you.
I think we need to be done.
I'm interviewing for the botany job.
Hamish Bax.
If I'm right, this should adjust circumstances in the entire greenhouse, allowing us to cast.
You risked everything for us.
The least we can do is to show you the truth.
You can't outrun me! Six children taken.
It's horrific.
- The Takers are swarming.
- It's my fault.
They're swarming because Seb summoned them with a spell using the gold I gave him.
I didn't know what he was gonna do with it.
The Takers that's how he stays in power.
He summons them - and only he can fight them.
- Jesus.
I go away to my nephew's bar mitzvah for one weekend and everything gets fercockt.
What are we going to do? We gotta kill the Dark King.
What? We're all thinking it.
Eli's Torah portion was all about the sanctity of life, and I found it very moving.
So, can't we, I don't know, peacefully overthrow him? No, we can't.
He's got a Centurion army.
I should know.
I'm one of 'em.
Also 300 years of propaganda convincing everyone they need him.
Also-also, 300 years? We're talking a powerful, immortal magician? Doubt you can just walk up and stab the guy.
I've been researching.
The Dark King survived seven assassination attempts since he took our thrones.
Must be big magic keeping him alive.
We have to figure out what it is.
Find out his weakness.
You're on board with this too? I mean, I'm here to stop an apocalypse that happens 'cause an evil force invades from a distant realm.
That sounds like the Takers.
Then it's settled.
We kill the Dark King, stop the Takers from pouring in, stop the apocalypse.
Who's in? Just a couple of Q's, like how are we gonna get close enough to the Dark King to learn his weakness and assassinate him? We're a cook, a maid, a army grunt, a Julia, and a Counselor/confidante.
You gotta admit, El, you're perfectly placed.
Plus, he's always dismissing his guards when you come around.
Why does me liking somebody always end up with them dying? You should tell your friends, Eliot.
That I don't want to save Fillory because I caught feelings? I'm saying they should know how you feel before they try to make you do something you regret.
No, I'll just look selfish, Charlton.
And I'll still end up having to do it.
- Talking to somebody? - Um myself and psyching myself up.
Fillory needs the Dark King dead and I am the obvious inside man.
You sound weird.
- You sound weird.
- Okay.
It's that Eliot.
Uh, look, I know I'm just the guy who has to live inside your tragic remembrances and all but I truly don't understand why you won't at least tell her.
Margo.
Look I'm not sure I can go through with this.
El, you have a crush on a boy who's bad for you.
Happens to all of us, but how do we get crushes out of our system? Lots of drinking, pining, some detailed sex fantasies.
No.
We bang them out.
Okay, that's great, except for the part where now I have to murder the guy I just hypothetically slept with, which is a thing that shouldn't really happen to a person more than once.
El, Fillory does need this, so if you can't do it, tell me now.
I know he has to die, but I don't hate him.
I don't.
I can't.
I can't make betraying Seb easier, but let me help make it simpler.
Say you didn't have to kill him yourself.
But I'm the one with access.
You just said it.
You're also my best friend.
If you can find his weakness, I'll find a way you don't have to be the one to do it, - I promise.
- How? I have no fucking idea, but I'll figure it out for you, okay? Okay.
You took the thing, the panel.
You can't just this is mass floricide.
Sorry, I had to bring the panel here so I could study it.
Sorry, I can't hear you over my plants dying.
Is this a western-facing window? And how we have a working classroom because, you know, school for magicians, not flowers.
Took the botany job 'cause you fixed up the greenhouse.
Should've known you'd just turn around and wreck it.
Here, let me explain how that feels.
Hey! - Wait, don't touch that.
- Huh.
Thick venation through the leaves, and look at the asymmetry here.
Wait, do you recognize it? Don't think it's terrestrial.
You'd need a classification expert with the right magical tools.
I know a taxonomist that's been around, you know, the multiverse.
Well, do you think we can get him to come here? Don't see why not.
- - I'll tell you why not.
Your pal Raylan is on the dean's "Do Not Admit" list.
You're Acting Dean.
Can't you just Alice.
- He's a botanist.
- Yes! Who visited a world called Anansia, home to some highly infectious shit.
He's still alive, isn't he? Magical phytologists do crazy shit, but Ray's smart.
I doubt he's carrying anything well, dangerous.
No offense, but I'm gonna trust the file with the red stamp.
Look, the only place on Earth right now with magic stable enough for Ray to examine it is in our lab, thanks to me installing the Circumstances Control Panel for you.
Don't you think figuring out the deal with magic is more important than translating some page you found about a plant? I found it in Quentin's desk.
This thing, it makes no sense except it was important to Q, so maybe it's important we figure out what it is.
If we test him thoroughly and he's clean, he can come.
- Uh hey, Fen.
- Yeah? - Can I ask you something? - Yeah.
Um, lately I've just been feeling a little bit off.
If we were on Earth, I'd know what to do, but is there, like, a magic plant or something out here that I can pee on to find out if I'm Pregnant! Shit.
Sorry.
God, I don't know why I'm crying, just babies, ahh! Um, do you know what you're gonna do? Um, I'm not so sure.
Do you want me to send a bunny to Penny? Uh, Penny and I are just we're sort of in a weird place.
Oh.
Actually, until I've had some time to process, I'd really appreciate if we could keep this - between you and I, please? - Of course.
I'm really good with secrets.
I've kept Eliot's fear of butterflies secret for years.
Until now, shit! - Sorry, I won't do that with you.
- Pregnant.
Made macarons.
Mango yuzu and matcha.
Anyone? Why? For sustenance? You love them.
Nice try, Hoberman.
We're on mission, so no distractions.
- Out.
- Sorry for interrupting.
Can you believe that guy? What are you talking about? You eat matcha everything.
Those macarons were a trap.
Josh is an emotional ninja.
He comes at you with sweets, and then you just confess things.
So you're still avoiding that conversation you owe him about leaving him in the past.
That is not gonna be a good talk, so we're not gonna have it.
We have real things to worry about, like how you're gonna find out the Dark King's secret.
And we can't enjoy mango yuzu macarons while we worry about that? Never take the food, Eliot.
Which gives me an idea.
Seb, I brought you something.
Oh, my God.
Are you okay? Six children.
Six children taken.
It's my fault.
If I'd have been there, I could've stopped them.
Being a king nobody knows what it's really like.
Seb do you think you could ever step down? I have to be king.
You don't have to be anything.
I could help you.
Eliot, I appreciate your concern more than I can say.
This is my burden.
I can't leave.
Is it something we can fix? A spell or a curse of some kind.
A choice I made a long time ago, tied to a conduit.
I thought it was the only way I could save Fillory.
A conduit? What do you mean? It was a lifetime ago.
So many lifetimes ago.
We could just get out of here.
We could just go camping or, um I'm sorry.
I forgot myself.
Look, Seb, we can make this okay.
Perhaps we shouldn't see each other again.
Sorry, Ray.
I gotta test you for spine-burrowing spiders.
You know the drill.
Chew, don't swallow.
Your Primula scotica isobelae is flourishing, Baxie.
Spit.
Everyone's panties untwisted? Because it turned purple? Purple is good, uncontrollably shitting spiders is bad.
Ray, what do you make of All right, Glasses.
I'm going to say a word that you don't know.
Phyllotaxis.
The arrangement of leaves around a central stalk.
Oh, you're one of those? Says the arrogant, dime-a-dozen academic with a plant fetish.
But later when you recount how you told me off, I'm sure you'll punch it up to be more of a dick chop.
Looks chaotic, but it's not.
If follows a mathematical sequence.
The leaves of this plant suggest that its origin is exceptionally exotic.
Or it is just a made-up drawing.
To an amateur, I could see that being the easiest explanation, yes, but no.
No, this has something.
Plants, they have a certain integrity to them, hmm? It's hard to fake that.
Do you think you can identify it? - Only guy who can.
- Mm, joy.
Would you be a sweetie and get me a spectral-reactive phytometer, a Bertric lens, and a pamplemousse LaCroix? - Happy to.
- No.
If I stay, I might kill him.
The Dark King's immortal because of a conduit? Like, a vitality conduit? Do we know what that is? Guess not.
It's an old naturalist ritual.
Draw life force from a stalk of corn to fight a summer cold, that sort of thing.
Seb's immortality comes from corn? What about a tree? He had a tattoo of one with what looked like maple leaves, only more jagged.
Oh! You can just talk.
Uh, that's a Blackwood tree.
Okay, so what if we locate the tree from Seb's tattoo and chop it down? Would that sever this conduit? In theory, yes.
He would be mortal and 100% stab-able.
So how do we find this tree? Who has two thumbs and aced their elective in dousing? Probably safer to send two of us, though.
Just in case something goes wrong.
Well, I'm a former tree goddess, I'll go.
No! You can't go on a long hike because you have the toe worms.
Oh, right, my toe worms.
I thought that was just a wooden toe thing.
You thought wrong.
There's a lot of misinformation about toe worms.
I have them.
You gonna make me take a hike? No.
No worm shame here.
Okay.
How about you, Margo? Could use your Centurion skills with all the Takers out there.
If you do that, it'll just leave me, and I kind of have a problem.
After our last talk, Seb told me to stay away from him, so I don't really think I'm in a position to, you know, stab him.
Yeah, but what if he needs you? You're his Magician advisor.
Fen and I will come up with a problem that takes two Magicians to fix assuming our toes can handle it.
It'll be touch-and-go.
Okay, but what if the Dark King can feel it when we chop down the tree and we have to act quickly? I just don't know how quick I can be, given everything.
Don't worry.
We'll make it work.
The fuck, Margo? You promised.
And I meant it.
You won't be the one to kill Seb, exactly.
Why are you being so weird and tricky about this? I thought I was clear.
- Thank you.
- Wait.
That is the worst mojito I have ever had in my entire life.
That's because not a mojito.
It's a potion.
I was gonna explain before you got all grabby, but I guess here we go.
Ugh.
Seb needs to die.
You can't do it, but I can.
So get ready to Ovary up, bitch.
Margo, did we just "Freaky Friday?" Bax! What did you do to him? He's fine, he's fine.
Give me my page back.
Look I will buy it from you.
Name your price.
Put it down now.
Holy shit.
I just pushed him.
It shouldn't have done that.
What the hell was that? We need to seal this room.
Jesus, Bambi.
That was kind of nonconsensual.
You drank before I could explain.
I have been trying to figure out to help you.
This is the only way I could think of to keep your hands clean of Seb's murder.
Except they literally won't be.
Those are my hands.
Look, you're the one who can get close, I'm the one with the will to stab.
El, I love you, but we have to do this thing.
Even you agree with that.
This is the best compromise I could come up with.
So listen up this spell's got a little quirk you should probably know about.
Tell anyone we've swapped and we won't be able to swap back permanently.
That is good to know.
Strange.
It's like you're Eliot but not Eliot.
Oh, my God, you're seeing Charlton.
What kind of a name is Charlton? Family name.
I never liked it.
He lives in my head your head.
And why is there a man living in your head? Charlton and I were Monster victims together.
He stayed in my head when you pulled the Monster out.
I held on real tight.
So if he's in your head, why didn't he swap with you? I have no idea.
Honestly, this is all very new.
I'd have given you a heads-up if I'd known your plan.
Listen.
Charlie, stay the fuck out of my way.
Hey, Bambi? Before you go all Bambi, and scare him off, why don't you maybe let him help you? I've managed just fine without a Tyler Durden up my cooch, thanks.
I'm just saying this Seb situation is pretty complicated.
You're not exactly a subtle relationship person.
From what I've seen, he's right.
He's gotta ride a really fine line with the Dark King.
He lost his love, but he likes me, so that feels like a betrayal.
That is a lot of drama to track.
What about you and Josh? Since I'll be going on a long walk to cut down a tree with him, is there anything I should know? Yeah.
If Josh tries to pull you into any kind of talk, just don't.
I was a little surprised to get your message after our last convo.
I know things got complicated.
The circumstances have changed.
Castle has been struck with a strange sleeping curse.
Is that what happened to wow.
We've kept it quiet.
Obviously, it requires a magical solution, but I'm afraid it's beyond me.
I think I know this curse.
Good news, there's a cure.
Only prob: It takes a bit of cooperative spellwork.
You need four hands to do it.
- I see.
- So you wanna solve this, we're gonna have to work together, even if it makes uncomf or whatevs.
You sound strange.
I haven't been feeling myself.
Since our last talk.
Yes.
Let us work together to solve this curious malady, for the good of Fillory.
That could've gone smoother.
Sleeping pollen worked like a charm.
Or a curse, I guess.
Oh, Umber's balls.
Margo just keeps leaving her uniform lying around.
Makes me feel like a maid.
Right.
Julia, let me take over.
Rest is good for the baby.
Not a baby.
Still baking.
But it'll become a baby.
You do know how this works, right? Look, Fen, I just want to live my life without this defining every aspect of it, you get me? Okay, well, if that's the truth then why haven't you done something about it? It's not a hard procedure, not even in Fillory.
You think I should abort it? I'm saying you should make a choice.
You're letting something into your life that you can't control and in lots of ways will control you.
It'll make you happy, or devastate you.
Yeah.
Look, I've been pregnant before, and it was really bad.
And I knew this time if I told everyone about it, they'd get worried and overprotective and I just wanted to take one of the next nine months to feel like maybe this time it wouldn't be so terrible, you know? Nine months? What are you talking about? It's Red Monkey Month.
- Red Monkey what? - Everything goes faster in Red Monkey Month.
Healing, crop growth, weirdly, not monkeys.
I'm sorry, are you saying that my pregnancy is going to be sped up? Julia, it already is.
As long as you stay in Fillory.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
- Get the fuck away from me.
- What's wrong? I thought I saw a butterfly.
You never know where they're gonna go next.
Lavender rose macaron? - I know they're your favorite.
- I'd better not.
Margo, it's a snack, not a trap.
You're a really good baker.
Also taller from this POV.
I learned to dial in that recipe while I was stuck in the past.
Fen had her knives, I had baking.
Oh, yeah.
That must've been tough for you both.
It was.
I mean sorry, I didn't mean to bring it up.
We don't have to talk about it.
Okay.
How much further, you think? It's just we thought we lost you guys, and it was a scary time, so So we must be getting near Seb's tree, huh? Are we really not gonna do this? Look, I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt when you wanted to abandon me in the past, but I know it wasn't about me.
Still, Margo, I have to ask.
Do you wanna break up? I mean, are we even a thing that can be broken up? I what do you think? Sometimes I feel like that's what you want.
Look, when we got together, I said I wasn't into games, and do you remember what you said? Oh.
You said, "Fuck games.
" That does sound like me.
I can accept it's over if you just say the words.
Josh, I wanna talk.
I really do, but I can't.
Except to say that maybe I need a little more time to forgive myself.
Oh.
Uh, really? Yes! Because I've realized that deciding to leave you in the past was a mistake a big one.
And now I need to earn your forgiveness, which may take a while, so we can kind of keep things status quo in the meantime.
I sure, sure.
Great.
Now, which way to the tree? Uh I think Ray was hosting a symbiote.
- He was possessed? - Not possessed.
It's rare, but a few fungus species have been known to join consciousness with other creatures.
You're still you, you just share brainpower, thoughts.
And then you explode.
Well, I'm not a mushroom guy, but I think that's because Ray merged with the fungus a long, long time ago.
Is he shit, are they dead? Ray is, but those particles that came out of him were fungal spores.
They'll want a new host body.
I sealed them inside the lab, but it might be a good idea to close the air vents.
Yeah, hi.
New to this job.
I have no idea how to control the school vents.
We need to evacuate.
Knew I should've trusted my instincts.
Hey, hey! There's a, um Eukaryotic photosymbiont.
Yeah, there's a monster on the loose.
Head to the Physical Kids' Cottage to be quarantined now.
Alice, give us the plant page Then we'll stop spreading.
Oh, oh.
Okay! New theory: The fungus can spread to multiple hosts.
This might be a zombie plague situation.
- What? - What? I say this is the man who blew up my Brakebills.
You're the worst goddamn dean we've ever had.
Yeah, I'm not here for a lecture from my prisoner.
Just hiding from spores.
Oh, so you remember that this room is hermetically sealed, but not to consult the "Do Not Admit" list? I did everything a dean is supposed to do.
A dean is supposed to have strong instincts, like knowing anyone who'd visit Anansia is also insane enough to visit other worlds with infections for which we cannot test.
- Do you want to help or what? - Yes.
I can provide a solution in exchange for my release.
How do we know you really have one? I developed a potion with a Dr.
Maria Pilkin.
You can check with her.
But she died in this timeline.
No deal.
We'll find our own way.
You cannot save your students without my help.
See, in our timeline Pilkin's work was published after her death, so it's in our library.
Gave away your leverage.
Thought a dean was supposed to have strong instincts.
I will get out of here, and then I'll turn you into lobsters and eat you.
Uh, okay.
Okay, the book we need is right there.
- See any twitching? - Just assume they're all infected.
And assume they're all looking for us.
It's too risky for us to go in together.
I know where it is.
I'll go.
Hey.
Remember, magic is unpredictable outside the lab.
So no phosphoromancy.
Good thing I have experience being invisible from high school.
Ooh, ooh.
You got us the book and a guinea pig.
Nice work.
It said the potion should work fast.
Penny.
Oh, shit.
Penny.
Just give up the page, Alice.
Almost ready.
Great.
Uh Margo, you have to draw this out.
The second they wake, Seb will dismiss you.
No shit, Sherlock.
This is all part of my plan to win him over.
How is finishing the ritual early and in silence part of your plan? Because I taught it to him wrong, so to fix it, I'm gonna have to get real close and personal.
Eliot? Something in the middle section doesn't feeling right.
The energies aren't moving as they should.
Hmm.
I can walk you through it.
Wait.
That's not right.
Here.
We should keep our distance.
It will make things easier.
Right.
Of course.
If you need my help, just ask.
Jesus' clits.
I know how to work a guy, Charlton.
Yes.
You do, Margo.
As Eliot, you're coming on too strong.
Seb likes Eliot's vulnerability.
Don't be pushy, just open up.
He and Eliot are close because of the losses they share.
I can show you the rest if you're ready.
But first, I think I owe you an apology.
- Eliot, that's not necessary.
- It's just I haven't felt this way in a really long time.
I think the fact that we both it just felt safe with you, you know? On that mountain we both felt it.
There's nothing wrong with wanting more.
I wish I could give you more, but I just can't.
I must put Fillory first, even if it means I suffer.
I do hope you understand that.
I get it.
It's hard to be king.
People don't know what you go through.
Now let me show you how to do that spell correctly.
Are we close to the tree? I don't mean to rush.
You're the expert.
Okay, that's it.
I'm not buying it.
- Not buying what? - Any of this.
Emotional, agreeable, patient? - You're not Margo.
- Who else would I be? This is Fillory.
I don't know.
You could be a hallucination, or or a shapeshifter, or an agent of the Dark King.
But I'm not.
Josh, I'm shit.
I wish I could explain.
Oh, well, until you do, I'm not taking you to the tree.
Got it? The antifungal kind of worked.
We got the spores out of him.
Yeah, and into Penny.
It must be the fungus' networking ability.
Long as it's alive in other hosts, it can still direct its spores into whoever it wants.
So why not into us? We were right there.
Penny was closer? I thought you were an expert.
I told you this isn't my area.
At this point, my best advice? Give the fungus what it wants.
No.
Ever since I found this page I knew it was important.
If the fungus wants it, I was right.
I have to know what it means.
Is it worth dying over? Is that what Quentin would want? For you to die, too? Back the fuck off, botanist.
Sorry.
Maybe I overstepped.
It's just Remember that plant I put on the windowsill in the lab? Yeah, you only screamed at me about it.
Scottish primrose.
It's this fragile little flower.
Even grass can kill it, so it has to survive on cliff walls where nothing else can.
It was my wife Isobel's favorite.
Primula scotica isobelae.
You named it after her? You remembered the name.
She loved that stupid flower.
Kept it alive without any spellwork.
Huge point of pride.
But I thought it was just kind of silly.
Then she died, so now I keep it alive.
If it's anything like that, I get why you'd wanna keep that page.
How long ago? Five years.
You? A lot less.
So how long until, you know, it feels less like it's eating all of you? I'm kind of still waiting.
I just feel like I'm gonna be this walking whatever-I-am forever.
I did too.
It starts like this tight ball in your chest, but over time, it gets lighter because it just kind of spreads into the rest of you.
It's like your own personal symbiote.
Yeah, kind of.
Except not murderous and weirdly paper-focused.
Just, uh sad.
Yeah.
Make it to a year.
It'll still suck, but it gets quieter.
I promise.
Shit.
I know what to do.
Damn.
I actually felt bad for him, for what he's been through.
He's a nice man, but an evil king.
It doesn't make sense.
He seems kind.
He seems sad.
Why the fuck would he summon those monsters into Fillory? Eliot.
I think we're finished.
It worked.
Before you go, perhaps we should talk? I don't know why he summoned them, but I don't think we're gonna get another chance at this.
Not as easy as it looks, is it? Josh, please.
Eliot's waiting for the signal.
If we don't chop down the tree, he's screwed.
We're screwed! You said you wish you could explain.
That means there's something to explain, so explain.
So you've been wanting to talk to me for weeks about what happened between us, but when I finally apologize you accuse me of being possessed.
Right, apologize.
Does that sound like Margo to you? Fine! Maybe I was saying what you wanted to hear, 'cause you never let up.
You keep trying to get me to talk about something I don't wanna talk about.
Okay.
Fine, I get that.
You wanna know the truth? You picked someone who will never put your first.
There's no fixing Margo I mean me, 'cause chances are if I had to relive it, I'd make the same decision.
So stop asking me to apologize for something I don't feel sorry about.
Now you sound like you.
Not that I won't feel differently tomorrow.
No, you won't.
You're very clear.
The Conduit Tree's that one over there.
Cut it down.
I'll give Eliot the green light.
Oh, God.
I'm fine here.
Go help the others search the castle for any remaining victims of the sleeping curse.
What you said last night did you mean it? Um Oh, right.
Uh, Eliot asked Seb if he'd consider giving up the throne.
He even offered to help him, but Seb said no.
Eliot, are you all right? Yes, sorry.
Of course I meant it.
Because I've been thinking.
Margo, the candles.
That's the signal.
They cut down Seb's tree.
- Eliot? - It's now or never.
Eliot should be done by now.
- Well, they're in a hurry.
- Gods, we're in trouble.
Here, take my extra knife.
All the knives in the world won't get us past the Centurions.
Do you have a better plan? Are you under a hex? A witch's spell? What's going on? I can explain.
Just there will be serious consequences if I do.
No, you can't tell him.
Margo, you'll be stuck in there.
There will be serious consequences if you don't explain.
You asked and I'm here.
So you gonna give up the page or make us spore you, too? I'll give it to you.
If you tell me why you want it.
It's an instruction manual.
- For what? - The World Seed.
It's magical botanical organism.
Legend is, the seed is pure potential.
The right nurturing, it can grow into almost everything even an entire world.
Well, if you want the page, does that mean you already have the seed? We're done talking.
Alice? What are you doing to us? Me? I'm just keeping you talking.
All that shared brainpower and you never thought to yourselves, where's Bax? I mean, you had us stumped for a while.
It seemed like if we got you out of one host you'd just keep spreading yourself to other ones, but you didn't.
For some reason, you were limiting yourself.
Some of your spores didn't try to spread.
Bax wasn't sure why because fungi can typically grow and grow.
But you're also a consciousness, like us.
And we have limits.
Try to juggle too much at once and we're useless.
It's a professor thing.
Just go with it.
So I have Bax spreading you too thin to affect your hosts mentally or physically.
You won't be able to control them anymore.
- You're killing me.
- No.
Don't worry, you'll be a part of your host forever.
You're just getting quieter.
This is the worst fucking job ever.
Penny, are you okay? Got your page.
Did you know why you wanted it? It's fading, but to sell.
There was this huge debt to pay.
I don't know what for, but when The Couple came to collect, we didn't they didn't ask any questions.
A couple of? No.
The Couple.
Weird name, but I remember feeling scared shitless.
The Couple has power.
It has resources.
It's been looking for the World Seed page a long time, and they are not good people.
And they know I have what they want.
I don't think that's gonna be the last person or thing to come after it.
The hell was Coldwater doing with instructions to something so powerful? Yeah.
I have no idea.
Jesus Christ, El.
You had one job: Don't blow up my relationship with Josh.
- And what did you do? - I'm sorry.
There's no way to avoid that conversation.
He's just so goddamn persistent.
Tell me about it.
By the by, Charlton's gonna go hang out in your beach memories for a while.
Think the whole Seb thing was hard on him.
So um, what did you and Seb talk about? You know, before? Don't do this to yourself.
I ended your relationship.
Seems like I deserve whatever pain's coming my way.
That wasn't your fault.
You were just dealing with some shit I set up way before you took over.
So in summation, we're both equally skilled at destroying our own happiness? Yeah.
Well, at least we used our powers for good? How fucked up is it that I miss him? El, there's nothing wrong with you.
He was hot and complicated.
Those are the ones worth banging.
You've just had some shitty luck with boys so far, that's all.
It doesn't mean you don't deserve love or that you won't ever find it.
Well, at least I have better luck with friends.

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