The Real Ghostbusters (1986) s01e01 Episode Script

Ghosts R Us

Ghostbusters ♪
There's something strange ♪
In the neighborhood ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters ♪
There's something weird ♪
And it don't look good ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters ♪
Somebody seen a ghost?
All right.
Hey, Peter! Would you look at this?
It's raining chocolate.
I hope they have soft centers. Ouch!
There's a definite PKE source inside.
Multiple entities.
This could be more dangerous
than it looks.
This is a unique
scientific opportunity here.
Come on, let's go.
Reminds me of a college
party I went to once.
We have three Class-5,
full-torso apparitions.
Amazing. But what bizarre,
warped dimension
do you think they came from?
Possibly New Jersey.
Hmm. Almost no intellect reading.
Egon, Ray, excuse me,
but could we move this gig along
before all this chocolate
makes me break out?
Boy, are they dumb-looking.
All right, you party animals,
it's cleanup time.
OK, OK, we know you're in there.
So come out with your claws up.
I don't think they're taking us seriously.
OK, Winston, then let them take this.
Opening the trapnow.
They're in.
-We got them.
-All right.
-Check. The place is clean.
-Well, yes and no.
It's all over folks, we got them.
Like taking candy from a ghouly. Ha.
Gentlemen, I'm the owner of this plant,
and I can't thank you enough.
True, true.
But as a token of my appreciation,
please accept this.
A year's supply of my finest chocolates.
Oh, yeah, how sweet it is.
Hi, guys.
Hi, Janine.
And how's the most beautiful
secretary in the world?
We brought you a little surprise.
Oh, guys, how sweet.
You're right. I am surprised.
-What's wrong?
-Hey, watch it.
Guess she's allergic to chocolate.
No, they're empty.
- Empty?
- Except one.
-I've been slimed.
Stand back, I'm gonna blast him.
This time I'm really gonna
Whoa, Peter, take it easy.
I'll discipline Slimer.
For shame, Slimer.
You've been a naughty ghosty.
Naughty? Naughty?
Come on, Ray,
he's been a major pain.
One more mess-up, Slimer,
and you're history. Got that?
Oh, We're gonna hit the sheets.
It's been a rough night.
- Hold all our calls, Janine.
- Hey, piece of cake.
Cake? Oh, boy.
It was a figure of speech, Slimer, OK?
Yeah, be right there, guys.
Soon as I dump these
Class 5s into cold storage.
Welcome to our 220-volt,
10-megawatt ecto-containment unit.
Nighty night.
Oh, boy.
- Anybody down there?
- Oh, no.
What is it?
Hello? Yo, anybody down there?
Funny, I could have swore
I heard somebody.
Oh, no.
One more mess-up, Slimer,
and you're history.
Move it, Zonk, we're waiting on you.
And I don't like waiting.
I'm coming, Pop.
-I told you to put him on a diet.
-I did.
But he only lost weight from his head.
I-I'm here, Pops.
You better start losing weight.
And comb your hair, it's a mess!
Yeah, it's all defslop
It's mess, Pa.
Now what are we gonna do, dear?
We're gonna run them gum heads
right out of business.
Right out of bUh--uh
But how, Pop?
You fool!
Now, say, "Ah."
Everybody out. Let's go.
We're experienced ghost grabbers.
We'll take it from here.
Oh, it's you, Pop.
Have no fear, Dr. Venkman
and his staff are here.
Everything is under control.
It sure is,
thanks to these two wonderful people.
Yeah, we've got the ugly beast
right in here.
We're from Ghosts 'R Us.
And you'll be hearing
a lot more from us.
Better luck next slime, Ghostbusters.
If it goes "Boo," we know what to do.
No, ma'am,
this is the real Ghostbusters,
not Ghosts 'R Us.
Never mind.
Hey, who is Ghosts 'R Us anyway?
I've had 20 calls for them today.
Yeah, that's what we'd like to know.
They're stealing all our customers.
I can smell a bogus a mile away,
and those guys are definitely bogus.
Not according to
my PKE meter, Peter.
I got a solid reading
from their containment unit.
There was definitely
a Class-5 phantom in there.
Ghostbusters, we're still number one.
Mm-hmm. Right. Gotcha.
All right, champs. Smalldorf Hotel.
Major disturbance.
Let's roll.
This time,
nobody beats the Ghostbusters.
Uh-oh. This looks bad.
Stand back, folks.
Go home, Ghostbusters.
This one's a wrap.
Thanks to Ghosts 'R Us.
-Who are you guys?
-Yeah, this was our call.
We got the ghosts,
ladies and gentlemen.
No problem.
How'd you get here before us?
Because we're numero uno.
Yeah, and you aren't-o.
You know, there's something
very familiar about those guys.
Something very ugly about them too.
Whoever they are,
they're putting us right out of business.
Did you see those
dumb Ghostbusters' faces?
Looked like they'd seen a ghost.
Uh, I hate this stupid can, Daddy.
How much longer
do we have to do this?
One last time, Zonk.
Then the Ghostbusters
will be history.
Comb your hair.
Spook Central calling Ecto-1.
Go ahead, Janine.
There's something freaky going on here.
What's wrong?
This whatchama-diddle
says we're three ghosts short.
That's impossible.
Nothing can escape that system
unless it's shut down.
Hey, wait a minute.
That's who those
Ghosts 'R Us goons look like.
The three Class 5s
we nailed this morning.
You're right, Peter.
Who could forget faces like that?
But how did they escape?
Oh, no.
Somebody must have
shut down the containment unit.
See, I knew I should have blasted him.
Hold on, guys, we got a call.
Stay calm, sir. Help is on the way.
Oh, good. The sooner the better.
Yeah, the better, the soon
The soonQuickly.
This one's a biggie, guys.
An old toy factory in Brooklyn.
But what about those escaped Class 5s?
Knowing them, they're
probably already there.
Then let's go.
Let's bag those turkey
They're coming.
They're coming.
They're coming.
They're coming!
And we're gonna be
ready for them.
They're coming!
Some toy factory!
This place is weird.
Look who's talking.
What are we doing here then, Pop?
Looking up an old friend, dear.
Yeah, Terlock's in there.
He's the Class-7 phantom
who haunts this dump.
Class-7? Oh, well, that's a lot
But they're very Powerful.
Right. That's why Terlock's
gonna make those Ghostbusters
run for the next state.
Watch this.
Hey, Terlock! It's me, Slug.
Come on out. Come on, Terlock!
We need you to do a first-rate
haunting for us.
Huh? Uh, that's great,
Terlock, but we're not ready yet.
Come on, Terlock, quit kidding around
Wait a minute. Where's Terlock?
He's gone. Permanently.
And you
have disturbed me.
Well, what do you know?
For a change,
we're actually the first ones here.
Make that the second ones here.
Would you believe the third ones?
It's at least a Class-8
free-roaming vapor.
Worse. A full-magnitude Class-10.
Whatever it is, it's about to mash
Manhattan into cheese spread.
OK, boys, roundup time.
Winston and I will ride herd.
Ray, you and Egon
head them off to detach with Ecto-2.
You got it.
All systems check?
Switching on power. Ready for launch.
All right. Let's kick some ectoplasm.
All clear behind us.
Prepare for launch. Launch!
Hey, Egon, ever gotten around
to taking those flying lessons?
Just checking.
There was a time I thought ♪
That I would never stumble ♪
Can you move it? I said step on it.
I'm not paying for this.
I've been going in circles ♪
What the
Late at night I see your face ♪
Peeking through my ♪
Going insane ♪
I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster ♪
Up and down you're driving me crazy ♪
Now I'm getting readings
from those Class 5s up ahead.
-Perhaps we can contain them there.
Ecto-1 to Ecto-2.
Looks like our ghosts
are headed for the river.
But traffic's killing us.
Hang on, Winston. I know a shortcut.
Woah-oh you're driving me crazy ♪
Uh. Ecto-1 to Ecto-2.
We're on our way.
Roger. We'll block the far end
of the bridge.
Ecto-2 to Ecto-1.
We've got them covered at this end.
Nice touchdown, Egon.
Psychic energy's increasing.
We'll have visual contact in four seconds.
Three seconds, two seconds, one second.
Trap open.
Here they come!
Wait up for me!
They're in. All by themselves.
But it's not over yet.
Ecto-2 to Ecto-1.
Uh. We're gonna require some assistance.
This is bigger than anything
we've ever encountered.
Yeah, and it sure looks mad.
Hang on, guys. We're almost there.
All this is because of Slimer.
If he hadn't messed up,
we'd be home in our jammies right now.
I don't like that gleam in his eyes.
Which eye? He has four.
What hit me?
Same thing that hit me.
Quick. Aim for the monkey.
Bring her around for another run!
It worked!
Great plan, Ray.
What's it take to stop this guy?
It's going after Ecto-2.
And we can't stop it.
All of this is because of Slimer.
If he hadn't messed up,
we'd be home in our jammies right now.
Slimer, wait. No, Slimer. Don't do it!
Get ready to jump, Ray.
I'm setting her on full-power overload.
Why do I suddenly want sushi?
In five seconds
the power unit goes terminal.
Slimer, I hate to say it but
you look marvelous.
Now, that's what I call a happy ending.
Not for everybody.
Uh. Did we win yet, Pop?
Ah, shut up!
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