The Real Ghostbusters (1986) s02e42 Episode Script

1
Ghostbusters! ♪
If there's something strange ♪
In the neighborhood ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters! ♪
If there's something weird ♪
And it don't look good ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters! ♪
I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪
I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters! ♪
Who you gonna call? ♪
Ghostbusters! ♪
Blow the man down matey
Blow the man down ♪
Way hey Blow the man down ♪
Blow the man down matey
Blow the man down hey ♪
Way hey
Blow the man down ♪
-Wrench.
-Oh, right.
Avast, lads!
Enemy ship off the starboard bow.
Prepare to fire.
Never set fire to a secretary, Winston.
Remember, she knows
where all the checks are.
We'll be just like Max Polopulus.
Sailing the tropical islands
in search of old pirate wrecks
laden with treasure.
Max who?
Max Polopulus. You know,
the famous treasure hunter.
Ray's been reading about him
in the newspapers for days.
Polopulus has just
opened a maritime museum
with an exhibit of his latest find.
Six hundred gold doubloons.
I can't wait to see it.
Screwdriver.
Yeah.
I'll bet folks will come from
all kinds of places to see that.
I've been sailing
these waters for 24 years,
and I've never seen a fog
as thick as this.
It's more like green molasses
than pea soup.
Uh, Captain.
I think something's out there.
Don't let the fog spook you, sailor.
Sound the horn.
And watch that radar screen.
Captain, look!
Gremlins at the Guggenheim?
Porcupines in the park? What now?
This one's a real mystery, Peter.
And you know how much I love a mystery.
Look at the holes in that thing.
I don't know,
I'm picking up tremendous latent P.K.E.
This could be bad.
I knew you'd say that, Egon.
Ooh.
What a mess.
It must be the housekeeper's week off.
We'll take the top. Peter, you take below.
Thanks ever so.
Whoop!
This is embarrassing.
Yoo-hoo! Anybody home?
Ugh, no wonder they call it the "mess."
Hello? Encyclopedia salesman!
Two for one, one for nothing!
Whoa!
Bad. Very bad.
We've made contact.
Peter encountered a G-class avian vapor,
with vocalization abilities.
No big deal. Birds always do this to me.
The P.K.E readings
are burying the needle.
I think the fog and
our tugboat haunting may be related.
No, you're kidding.
This is New York City.
We get fogs like this every day,
right, guys?
Arr! Shiver me timbers.
These be four men
who aren't afraid of ghosts.
They're there watching in the future,
as Captain Jack Higgins
takes back what's rightfully his.
I swear as I swore before,
none of us, ship,
crew or captain, shall rest
till the treasure I lost
be mine once again.
A strange vessel approaches
through the fog, Captain.
What are your orders?
We wait. Now, stand at attention, dog.
Show some respect.
There be times I'd love to kill this bird,
if it weren't already dead.
Attention!
Your vessel is unauthorized
in these waters!
Follow us to docks at once,
or we shall be forced to board you!
How this tiny berg has changed
since last we visited, Captain.
Aye.
Who would have thought
our right to safe passage
would be challenged by
a tiny canoe like that.
Fire!
All right, you sea dogs,
board their canoe!
Abandon ship! Abandon ship!
Hmm. Something tells me
trouble's coming our way.
Ugh! Guess who's coming to dinner, fellas.
Unbelievable.
That's actual ectoplasmic lumber.
A ghost ship carrying ghost pirates.
Astounding.
The last recorded event of this magnitude
happened 200 years ago.
Hmm. There's something
familiar about that figurehead.
Of course. The Stag.
That's Captain Jack Higgins' ship.
He was the blackest pirate
who ever sailed the seven seas.
Stay with us, mateys.
We'll either find our rightful treasure,
or we'll make away with
every valuable we can carry.
Do you think you can be doing
that somewhere else?
Forward, me mateys.
A treasure trove awaits,
ours for the taking!
All right, let's get him.
That's what I like, a plan.
I just hope our Containment Unit
is big enough to hold that thing.
Relax. We'll make sawdust
out of that ship.
Fire!
We'll show these landlubbers
what we're made of.
Heads up!
That was close.
You fellas all right?
I think so. And I've got another idea.
-Don't tell me.
-We'll hit them high
While we hit them low.
Argh! These boys don't know
when they're beaten.
Attack!
Show them no mercy!
I smell a rat, Pete.
Those guys could be smarter
than they look.
They'd almost have to be, wouldn't they?
I've got a bad feeling about this.
Be careful. They'll probably
come swinging from the sky.
Scram! Go away!
I think we need another plan.
Hey! Cut that out! Put me down!
Oh, no. That's not what I mean.
Stop! Stop!
Come aboard, mateys. Come aboard.
Our treasure beckons.
Let's go get them. And for a change,
let's rain on their parade.
Come on, back it up!
Get out! Get out of there!
Oh, no.
So this is the world of the living, eh?
My, how things have changed.
Aye. Look of them scurry, lad.
As timid as ever.
Our treasure be nearby.
I can sense its presence.
Aye. And there'll be
other treasure aplenty for the taking.
Be off, men.
Plunder be yours for the taking.
Be there no place you want to go?
The trouble is definitely this way.
But we've gotta get them
together in one place
if we're gonna contain them all.
I just wish I knew what those pirates
had on their minds.
It's as if they were after
something in particular.
Treasure at the Maritime Museum.
The gold doubloons found by Max Polopulus.
The strongbox had an emblem of a stag.
We've got to get there ahead of them.
I know a shortcut.
We can get there ahead of them.
Can't you get this heap going any faster?
I'm doing my best, man,
but the engine's sluggish.
And since I just tuned up this baby,
that can mean only one thing.
Slimer.
Hi, Ray.
Out! Now, Slimer.
Gentlemen, up till now it's been
three to one against frying Slimer.
Anyone wanna change their vote?
Let me get back to you.
Now, let's move.
My stars there be, matey.
Aye.
Look at the clothing on this one.
What will! What finery!
Well, howdy.
Hey. What the
Just what do you think you're doing?
Ow! Ooh!
Come back here,
you consarned varmints!
Ma was right.
Never should've left Houston.
Ah! There be maidens
who aren't afraid of pirates.
Oh, how long it's been since
Oh, since
Since what?
It's been so long I can't remember.
These aren't women. They're made of wood.
We've been swindled. This is an outrage!
Arr. And here come the rest.
So it's jewels you found, eh?
And nothing for your captain, lad?
Thank you, lad.
Arr! Fits like a glove.
And now if you've had your fill,
onto the real treasure.
Just what makes you so sure
this Max Polopulus is gonna help us?
Well, he seems like
a great guy in his press clippings.
You were right, Ray.
The emblem on the strongbox
is the same as the figurehead on the Stag.
We've got to get this
treasure out of here, fast.
No. Not under any circumstances.
There's forms to be filled out,
permission to be asked, and denied.
You can't just go around
borrowing exhibits
just because there's an emergency.
Now, please, leave and don't return
until you've gone through channels.
I've got a good mind
to go home and take a nap.
Let Captain Jack Higgins
have his treasure.
I can't believe how stubborn
Mr. Polopulus was.
And to think I admired him.
He's only human, Ray.
And still a man of science
in his own fashion.
And there may be another way.
Come with me.
I want you three to look at something.
I think we could work up
a pretty sneaky ambush
in these surroundings, don't you?
There the treasure be.
The call of the strongbox be near.
I can feel it in me bones.
Are you sure this'll work?
No. But I figured since you're
the one always coming up with plans,
it was my turn to have some fun.
Winston, are you ready?
Egon, are you ready?
Absolutely, Peter.
Slimer.
I told you to stay by the car.
I don't want you contained by accident.
Quick. Go hide somewhere safe.
Forward, mateys. The time has come for us
to retrieve our treasure at last.
I've always wanted to do this.
Fire!
Ghostbusters! ♪
Well, we've got some.
Do we contain them now or do we wait?
How am I supposed to know?
I just wanted to loosen them up.
They're loose. They're loose.
Next time I think of the plan here.
Ghostbusters! ♪
Set that Trap.
Hey, two at once is no fair.
I always wanted to do this.
Winston, that was definitely
one giant leap for ghostbusting.
Are you okay?
How come this never happens in the movies?
Follow those bird!
Please, get out of my museum.
What do you want from my life?
Hey, I know what you want.
But you're not going to get it.
You'll have to fight me for it.
A horde of ghosts couldn't scare me away.
Now a hoard that big
Maybe.
Where does my treasure be?
I sense it near.
Bye-bye.
Are you the one who stole me treasure?
Our treasure.
Me? Oh, no. II just work here.
At last, me beautiful treasure.
I can't wait to take it back
with me to the deep.
It's our treasure.
Captain, the landlubbers
are firing their weapons at the Stag.
Argh!
We don't have to stand
for that kind of treatment.
Way to go, guys.
Yeesh!
About time you showed up, you little spud.
No! Not that lousy parrot, too. No!
That's him! That's him!
He's the worst of the bunch.
Don't worry, Mr. Polopulus,
we know how to take care of him.
Blow the man down matey ♪
Blow the man down ♪
Way hey blow the man down ♪
Way hey blow the man down ♪