The Sex Lives of College Girls (2021) s03e03 Episode Script
Four to a Suite
1
Give me one good reason
to stay today ♪
BELA: I don't know
how else to put this,
but who are you?
I'm Kacey,
and if you ever forget,
just look at my pillows,
my towels, or my bedazzled tumbler cup.
Well, it's nice to meet you.
I'm Whitney.
- That's Bela and Kimberly.
- (KIMBERLY GASPS)
Should we play a game to help
you remember our names better?
Everybody pick an adjective with
the same letter as your name.
I'm Kooky Kimberly.
That's so nice, but I have to go
meet up with my boyfriend.
You found a boyfriend already?
Oh, no, we were already dating.
I transferred here to be with him.
Oh, that's so sweet.
Yeah, we've been together
since seventh grade.
- Oh.
- The hardest day of my life
is when we got our
college acceptance letters.
He got into Essex and I didn't.
So I went to Duke, we did long-distance,
and I tried as I could to stand out
as a transfer applicant and I got in.
That's like Cinderella. (CHUCKLES)
Seventh grade?
Sorry, I got stuck back there.
You can't control when you find love.
I'm sorry, are you engaged?
Oh, no, it's more serious than that.
It's a promise ring.
Calvin and I are saving
ourselves for marriage.
Holy shit, so you're a virgin?
Sorry, I think I said that too loud.
You did.
What are your boyfriends' names?
We're uncommitted at the moment.
Oh, I'm sorry.
No, it's more of like
a proud feminist thing.
Oh, I'm a feminist, too.
I'm a girly girl, through and through.
Is that the same thing?
Well, I better get going.
Do you want me to show you
around campus on your way?
I know the prettiest places.
And if you like ivy as much as I
do, do I have the pergola for you.
Oh, I'll be fine.
I really won't even be around that much.
I'll be with Calvin, like,
almost all the time.
But it was really nice to meet
you, Whitney, Bela and Kooky.
- Oh, that's not my
- (DOOR CLOSES)
Is it me or was she
super nice and smiley
but also a total bitch?
Wasn't just you.
I feel bad about myself.
Won't you dance with me,
dance with me ♪
Know how it feels
all the time ♪
'Cause I've been up dancing
alone, up dancing all night ♪
I want it, oh-oh. ♪
Okay. Mm. (GRUNTS)
Just so you know,
I really do need to study.
That wasn't just an excuse
to get you up here.
Okay, there is no need to apologize.
Stopping a hookup to study
is literally the hottest thing
you could for me.
(CHUCKLES) Okay.
I've never been with a bi guy before.
Oh.
Sorry, was that weird?
No, no. It's all good.
Uh, being cool with talking about
it sort of comes with the territory.
At least for me.
It's usually girls
who have a harder time.
Like, casual stuff, they're
fine, but then dating?
How so?
Well, a lot of straight girls think
that they can handle dating a bi guy
- Uh-huh.
- But then they sort of freak out.
You know, they're worried that
I'm secretly seeing a guy on the side
or that I'm gay and I haven't
fully come out yet,
a lot of stereotypes.
I, for one, am outraged.
And on behalf of straight women
everywhere, I am sorry.
Very progressive.
I'm nothing if not an ally.
I actually always thought
that the "B" in LGBTQ
should come first, BLGBTQ.
You said "B" twice.
And I'm fine with that.
So have most of your longer
relationships been with guys?
Yeah.
Yeah, I was with my ex for 18 months.
Oh. And what was he like?
He was fine. We're still friends.
- That's him.
- (GASPS)
- Wow, he's very attractive.
- Mm-hmm.
He actually kind of looks like my ex.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- I mean, not not.
- (LAUGHS)
Oh, my God, Eli.
Do we have the same taste in guys?
That's fun.
Below our knees ♪
It's ya backyard, shorty. ♪
Hey.
How was it?
A drug and alcohol counselor
spoke to me for five minutes,
handed me a pamphlet
and asked if I know Adele.
And you said?
Obviously I don't know Adele.
ARVIND: Bela!
BELA: Arvind.
Aw, you didn't have to get me
a box of chocolates.
Oh, I didn't.
I know. I was joking.
Oh. Oh! (LAUGHS)
- That's funny.
- It wasn't, though.
But no, I actually got this for
the bursar's assistant, Margaret.
She's recovering from a hip replacement.
I mean, not that she needed it.
She was pretty hip to begin with.
(ARVIND CHUCKLES)
- That's good.
- Yeah, I know.
I didn't come up with it.
I got it from hospitalpuns.com.
BELA: Well, I really like it.
Anyway, have a great day.
Okay, you are deeply bad at flirting.
Uh, I was not flirting with Arvind.
He's not the type of guy I go after.
My two types are like Jason Momoa
and small comedy men
who look like Rachel Maddow.
I think you should ask him
to lunch or something.
You can talk about your nerdy
desires to help other people.
You're the person I'm helping.
And yet, I'm unmoved. Hmm.
He's leaving
- What are you gonna do?
- (EXHALES)
BELA: Uh, Arvind?
Would you, uh, maybe want to grab lunch?
And talk FAF stuff,
give me a few pointers?
- I would love that.
- Yeah?
I'll message you.
I will message you right back.
- (BIKE BELL JINGLES)
- Beep, beep, beep.
KIMBERLY: Ooh, we're
getting our first papers back.
(GASPS) I got a C?
Actually, it's good.
I'm here first and foremost to learn.
I am a humble student
of the African American
studies experience.
It's not racist to be bummed
about a bad grade.
- Okay.
- Hmm.
"A+. See me."
What the hell does that mean?
Why would I need to see her
if I got a perfect grade?
Uh, Professor Phillips?
Just so you know,
I didn't cheat or anything.
I mean, I've only used ChatGPT one time,
and it was to help my mom write jokes
for a chili cook-off she hosted.
I didn't think you cheated.
At least not until
about two seconds ago.
(CHUCKLES)
But that's not why I
wanted to talk to you.
I thought your paper
was thoughtful and smart
and it had such a clear perspective.
I loved it.
Oh. Well, thanks. (CHUCKLES)
I really think you should consider
African American studies
as a possible major.
Uh, wow, that's so nice, uh,
but I'm already majoring in STEM, so
Yeah, definitely not.
Well, there's always a double major.
Totally, but, yeah, no.
Uh, STEM lab work is a lot,
and I also play soccer, so
I just don't know if that's
really, like, worth it.
Not worth it?
Just 'cause, like,
STEM leads to jobs?
Hmm.
No, Af-Am does, too, uh,
just not as much.
Well, I mean, like,
you clearly have a job.
And I'm sure it's rewarding.
I mean, not, like, financially
but in other ways.
No, I mean I'm-I'm happy for you
and the your job you have.
Thanks for that, Whitney.
I'm so glad I asked you to come see me.
You can go.
Yeah.
Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
I know you think
that I'm a lie. ♪
BELA: I'm meeting up for
lunch with this guy tomorrow.
- Oh, shit.
- Ooh.
- Are you not excited?
- I'm not sure.
I-I feel like I want to like him,
but he has this one thing about him
that's, like, my biggest turnoff.
He's nice.
Wait, that's the turnoff?
What, you don't like
nice people? I'm nice.
I like nice people.
I just don't like nice guys, sexually.
It's a boner killer.
Are we seriously
not all aligned on this?
You thought we would agree with you?
This is crazy to me.
Okay, you're watching Aladdin.
Who's the hottest character?
The answer is Aladdin.
The answer is Jafar.
He's so much hotter.
Aladdin's singing songs
and giving apples to babies.
Jafar knows what he wants
and he takes it.
- Mm.
- Okay, I don't like that.
Okay, I'll give you another example.
You're watching Hercules
We don't need another example.
And why are they all animated?
My point is, nice guys
are nice to everyone.
But getting the attention of a bad boy?
That makes you feel special.
Bela, I've seen you
get horny for a tree.
I'm pretty sure you can go
on a date with a nice guy.
I was not horny for a tree.
I just said it had muscular roots.
Okay, I am too hungry to handle
this. Can you take this one?
Maybe seeing a nice guy
is good for you right now.
Just give him a chance
and see what happens.
Fine.
But can I please
share my Hercules thought?
- If it's important to you.
- It is.
So, Hades is never shirtless
in the movie,
but if you look closely
Oh, hey, you three.
This is my boyfriend Calvin.
And these are my roommates
Whitney, Bela and Kooky.
Actually, it's Kimberly. I
meant to clear that up earlier.
- Oh.
- Would you like to sit with us?
Oh, it's okay.
Calvin and I are gonna find
a private spot to eat alone,
but enjoy your little girls' night.
Little girls' night? Okay, that time
she was definitely
being mean to us, right?
- Holy shit, you guys.
- What?
I think I saw Calvin
at a party last year
hooking up with some other girl.
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
- Are you sure?
- I'm pretty sure it was him.
And they were definitely kissing.
We have to tell her, right?
Whoa, hold on. You don't even seem sure.
Also, she might not even want to know.
I wouldn't want to know.
It's more peaceful to be clueless.
I agree with Bela.
- You do?
- You do?
Yeah, I mean, Kacey is basically
a complete stranger to us.
You wouldn't want your life upended by,
I don't know,
that random girl back there.
My friend Nell?
Okay, didn't know you knew her,
but you get what I'm saying.
We shouldn't tell her.
I see your point.
You should meet Nell, though.
She's very cool
and she has an air fryer.
Oh, shit. Okay, Nell.
(CHUCKLES)
♪
PHILLIPS: During Katherine
Johnson's 33-year career
I'm telling you, she hates me.
She hasn't looked at me once.
She can't look at everyone in the class.
Trust me, I've been sitting here
at attention like a meerkat
trying to get a moment with her myself.
Sure, but you
didn't accidentally insult
her entire set of life choices.
Okay, you got to let this go.
There's no way it bothered her.
Whitney Chase. Care to comment on that?
Uh, comment on what?
On who I was just talking about.
Oh. Oh.
Oh, them.
Um, they're great. Yeah, just
overall very inspiring.
And
I think I can speak for everyone
when I say thank you for
you know, telling us about they.
And who were we talking about?
- (COUGHS): Katherine Johnson.
- Magic Johnson.
(LAUGHTER)
Magic Johnson
and his involvement in Project Mercury?
Any other basketball players
help us get to space?
Maybe the cast of Space Jam?
(LAUGHTER)
Project Mercury was the first
U.S. human spaceflight program.
And it was successful in part
thanks to orbital mathematician
Katherine Johnson.
And tonight you can write me
a two-page paper
on the differences between her
and the greatest point guard
of all time.
MAN: Magic Johnson's not the greatest!
What? This is not up for debate.
- (LAUGHTER)
- WOMAN: What about Luka?
- Luka? Get out of my class.
- (LAUGHTER)
All right, you guys, settle down.
Let's get back into it.
At least she looked at you.
♪
LILA: Keep it sweeping, Cinderella.
Girl, why are you looking
at your phone so sad?
KIMBERLY: Yesterday Eli showed
me a photo of one of his exes,
and it was like this ripped muscle guy.
- Ooh.
- And at first I was like (GASPS) "Ah,
we have the same taste in men,
that's cute."
- Weird. Okay, continue.
- But now I'm on his page, and it's like,
he's been with a bunch
of guys like that,
but, like, no one who looks like me.
- Ah.
- And so I'm starting to feel
a little insecure about
how different I'd be
in sexual matters.
- Let me see one of these exes.
- Oh.
Oh, wait. Eli used to fuck with Jared?
I know him from Grindr.
- You're on Grindr?
- Yes.
And Scruff and Sniffies.
I use all gay hookup apps
for friendships.
Hell, I've met gay men on Google Sheets.
Okay, so what do you think?
Am I probably just, like, in my head
and it's nothing for me to worry about?
No, you probably should.
- Seriously?
- Bitch, I'm agreeing with you.
That guy looks like he can do
a thousand pushups.
You look like you struggle
to push open heavy doors.
Your bodies are different.
What? Okay, well, what can I do?
Let me give you some advice
from my upcoming book about sex
that I've not yet begun to write.
Now that you've seen what he's used to,
you got to play to your partner.
WOMAN: Hi, uh,
- can I have a cold brew?
- Just a sec.
Your romantic, ladylike,
Jane Austen-style sex
ain't gonna do shit for him.
He's experienced.
You got to be surprising, adventurous.
Suck a toe. Hell, suck a foot.
Am I right, Canaan?
Do not suck a foot.
He knows nothing about men.
If he's used to being with a Jared,
you got to give him a little Jared.
Trust me, I'm the Goddess of Grindr,
and, yes, that is my screen name.
Huh.
Oh.
Oh, shoot, did the customer leave?
So I said, "Toby, it's okay.
Sometimes I get homesick, too."
And before I knew it,
we were both crying.
- It was really cathartic.
- Mm.
What's your favorite thing
about being a FAF?
Have you shared any good cries yet?
Oh, crap.
Uh, I just remembered,
I have this thing I have to do.
- Oh.
- I'm sorry.
- Hi, Bela.
- All right.
Carla.
- Hi.
- I know we haven't talked yet this year,
and I just wanted to tell you,
whatever you've got going on,
I hope it's going well.
Thanks. You, too.
- It's going great.
- (LAUGHS SOFTLY)
Chicken nugget day.
- (CHUCKLES)
- (GRUNTS)
Are you okay? Are you?
- What's going on? Oh.
- (COUGHING)
Okay, she's choking.
Hey, everyone, stand back.
- Ma'am, consent to touch you?
- (STUDENTS MURMURING)
Okay. (GRUNTS)
(STUDENTS GASPING)
("FIRE IN MY HEAD" BY TWO FEET PLAYING)
(DISTORTED SHOUT)
Girl, I don't want
nobody else ♪
(BOTH MOANING)
You say. ♪
(RETCHES)
(CARLA PANTING)
Are you okay?
- I'm okay.
- She's okay.
- (CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
- So
CARLA: You saved my life.
- I'm feeling it ♪
- It happened.
I'm horny for nice.
I ♪
- I'm feeling it. ♪
- (ENTRY BELL JINGLES)
Good afternoon.
Or, I guess it's almost evening.
Good almost evening.
I was just walking by,
running some local errands,
and I realized I'd never been
inside this store.
What a wonderful collection
of goods you have.
So colorful.
First time in a sex shop?
Yes. Although, in middle school,
my friends and I did run through
the adult section
- of a DVD store.
- And how was that?
I kept my eyes closed
and bumped into a wall.
- Hmm.
- (GASPS) Oh, this looks nice.
And I need some new moisturizer.
My hands get so dry here
during the winter.
- That's ass lube.
- Oh.
You don't have to be nervous.
Sex is part of life, and this is a place
where you can buy things
to help with that.
- Mm.
- In that way we're no different
than, like, Best Buy or Target.
There's a rack
of edible underwear behind you.
Okay, we're a little bit different.
Sounds like you're here
for a specific reason.
How can I help?
I want the guy I'm seeing
to think I'm adventurous.
Are you allergic to latex
or any other textures?
No, but I'm allergic
to cashews and penicillin.
I don't think that will be a problem,
so let me show you around.
♪
(OVERLAPPING SHOUTING)
Whoo!
(SIGHS)
(PANTING)
(CHEERING)
- (WHISTLE BLOWS)
- That's practice, ladies.
Whitney.
- Can I talk to you?
- Yeah. What's up?
I want to try something
different for our next game.
How do you feel about me
moving Rina to center?
Well, that's my position.
No, right, it's just
you're so versatile,
you can play anywhere,
but Rina seems to particularly
thrive at center.
If this is about today's
practice, I know I was off,
but I've just been tired
and busy with classes.
Don't overthink it. It's just strategy.
It's gonna be for the best, I promise.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
♪
(DOOR OPENS)
Are you okay?
Whatever you're mad at,
it's accentuating your 11s.
Relax your face or they will stick.
Thanks, Kacey.
I'm surprised you're even here.
Oh, I know, it's like,
"Does she even live here?
Basically just to sleep.
Otherwise she's at C's place."
That's what I call Calvin. "C."
Isn't that cute?
What happened?
That first-year Rina took my position.
They moved me to wing.
KIMBERLY: Whitney, no.
The worst part is, it's my fault.
I-I'm tired because I put
too much on my plate
between classes and labs.
But I know what I need to do.
HGH?
No, I'm dropping a class.
Bye-bye, Af-Am.
You can't. That's our class.
The professor hates me.
She keeps giving me extra assignments.
Look, I'm just gonna
email her right now.
"I regretfully have decided
I must drop your class."
Send. Done.
Well, I support the dropping
of any and all classes,
and I will be celebrating with you
by getting drunk tonight at Omega.
- Hell yeah.
- KACEY: Oh, I wish I could join,
but Calvin's staying in to study,
so I'm just gonna take
some time for myself.
That's nice.
Sometimes, when I want to relax,
I just get into child's pose
and listen to a nice, long podcast.
Oh, no, I meant tinting my brows,
lifting my lashes,
glossing my highlights,
whitening my teeth,
and deep-hydrating my neck.
Y'all are so funny, though.
- Ah.
- ARVIND: Knock, knock. Hey.
Arvind, what are you doing here?
You mentioned you were out
of roommate complaint forms,
so I thought I'd come by
and drop some off.
Hi, everyone, I'm Arvind.
- Hi.
- BELA: Aw,
you didn't have to come all the way here
- for that.
- Oh.
That's so nice of you.
ARVIND: Oh, it's no biggie
at all. I had to come over
by this way anyway to meet up
with my girlfriend later, so
Oh. You have a girlfriend.
ARVIND: Yeah. Oh, you would love her.
Her name is Emily.
She's a FAF, too.
I mean, she's way cooler than me.
Get this: she plays
pop songs on the cello.
Hmm.
It's good to meet you all.
- Have a good rest of your day.
- (CHUCKLES)
I'm sorry, Bela.
That's what happens
when you like an Aladdin.
She's allowed to say that.
Mm-hmm.
Teaching our minds
to be smarter ♪
(BOTH MOANING)
Oh, you are so hot.
You, too.
Oh.
You down?
I'm down.
I'm so down.
(PANTS UNZIP)
Turn over.
What?
I said, "Turn over."
I think I'm good this way.
I went to the store
and I got you something.
I, um
I get what you're hinting at,
but it's just not something I want.
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
- Oh
- It's fine.
This is so embarrassing.
- Well
- Uh, I'm just
I'm gonna go.
You don't have to go.
Uh, I'm fine, I just yeah.
(DEVICE VIBRATING)
Goddamn it. Oh
Stop. Stop.
(DOOR CLOSES)
Ready, here we go ♪
Speeding up, I'm in control ♪
I'm always in the zone ♪
Stepping into the unknown ♪
- You did what?
- Why would you take Lila's advice?
- Lila's usually right.
- Literally when?
Maybe she just says things
louder than everyone else.
- Yes.
- Yeah, she does. Look,
I know you like this guy,
and I think you can fix it.
You just need to talk to him.
That's the only way to know
what he likes or doesn't like.
Or I could preemptively ghost
him before he ghosts me.
You can't ghost a ghost.
I know you're right. I'll talk to him.
Look, we've all had rough days,
so let's just take a breath
and appreciate that we are at a party
with muscly lacrosse boys
of wildly different heights.
WHITNEY: Agree.
- Should we get a drink?
- Yes.
You won't regret it ♪
Uh, yeah, you guys go ahead.
I'm gonna check up on Taylor.
- Okay.
- To the left, to the right like ♪
Drip drop ♪
Like when I hit it
with that ♪
Oh, shit. Is that Kacey's boyfriend?
(GASPS) Calvin?
Isn't he supposed to be studying?
WHITNEY: He's definitely studying
- her ass with his hands.
- I can't believe it.
I mean, it's possible they're
just grinding as friends,
like platonic grinding.
(KIMBERLY GASPS)
I knew it! Kacey's Calvin's a slut.
You'll hear from me.
Better.
I'm turnin' up the heat ♪
Till we sweatin'
through the sheets ♪
I always roll the dice ♪
That girl was hot. What was her name?
Oh, I have no idea.
I'm just saving her on my phone
as Hot Blonde with today's date.
I have a system.
What you drinking?
Cup full of vodka with a splash of rum.
It's sparkling water.
Girl, I don't know if I'm
supposed to check on you.
Honestly, it's fine.
I'm not even craving alcohol.
I'm too focused on my new goal.
Making out with all
of the women on this campus.
Can I help you with something?
Arvind has a girlfriend.
The nerd on the bike?
- That's quite surprising.
- (SIGHS)
- I'm sorry.
- Yeah.
I don't know much about her.
Except for what I found out
scrolling all the way back
to the beginning
of her Instagram account.
Oh, okay, you are
way cuter than this girl.
Thank you.
I did intentionally choose to
show you her worst photo, but still
I appreciate it.
It sucks to finally find a guy
who would treat me well
and he's unavailable.
Universe is a cruel bitch.
Nut up.
Make him realize
he should want you, too.
Here's what you do.
Send him a text saying,
"I can't wait to be
in your bed tonight."
Then send him another being like,
"Whoops, sorry, I meant that
for somebody else."
Once he reads that,
he'll imagine you naked
and bye-bye, girlfriend.
Last year I for sure
would have done that
- and added three nudes, but
- (PHONE CHIMES)
trying to make different choices.
I'm heading out.
- Is that the girl from before?
- Yes.
Maybe.
It's definitely a girl from before.
My system's not perfect.
♪
(SIGHS)
Bela. Bela, guess who's here. Calvin.
And he's making out with someone
who isn't Kacey.
Shit. All right, we might need
to tell Kacey.
- Where is he?
- Kacey, hi.
Ooh.
How's your self-care night going?
Kooky told me.
I texted her. She deserves to know.
So you're just responding to Kooky now.
BELA: Okay, Kacey, I know you're upset,
but let-let's take a minute.
You might not want to make a scene.
Obviously, we're gonna go watch.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Kacey? Uh, what are you doing here?
- And, um, what's in your hair?
- Don't talk about my hair!
Is this true? Are you cheating on me?
Calm down. You're being crazy.
Oh, he did not just tell her to
calm down and call her crazy.
I'm not cheating. We were just dancing.
Uh, he's lying. I saw them kissing
and I'm pretty sure I saw him
kissing someone last year.
KACEY: Oh, my God.
I transferred here for you.
I-I'm sorry, baby.
Just, long distance
was really hard for me.
(GASPS) Was it? Oh!
I am so sorry
that you had to go through that alone
being the only one doing it.
How far did this go?
Please, please tell me
that you didn't
You had sex with someone?
While I'm wearing
a promise ring you gave me?
I know it's wrong, but my dad is
a pastor and he forgave me.
Well, you and your ugly priest dad
can suck it.
We are so done.
Kacey, maybe we should go.
Uh-uh, he's the one who should go.
CALVIN: I'm not going anywhere.
KACEY: If you don't leave,
I am going to make a huge fucking scene!
Okay, fine. I'll go.
And you know that part of your
body you're insecure about?
It is weird!
Thank you so much for texting me.
And thank you, too, for having my back.
You don't even know me
and you looked out for me.
Of course. You're our roommate.
Yeah. We got you.
But, uh, you don't actually
want to stay here, do you?
No, I've literally never
looked worse in public.
Can you please shield me
all the way home?
- We can do that.
- Okay.
- BELA: Look away, keep drinking.
- WHITNEY: Sorry, excuse us.
♪
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
Hey. Sorry for stopping by so late.
That's not late. I was just
about to head out for a party.
A party that starts now?
Who's hosting it?
A frat run by possums?
Uh can we talk?
- Yeah. Come in.
- Thanks.
I wanted to apologize for before.
I think I did the thing you said
a lot of straight girls do.
Yeah, you did.
Well, actually, no straight
girl's ever done what you did.
That was next-level.
- Mm. Mm-hmm.
- Mm.
It's really simple.
Me being bi doesn't mean
you have to change a thing
about your sex life.
You don't have to overthink it.
I just wanted to be
a really awesome ally girl.
And I promise you can do that
without pegging me.
Yeah.
You don't have to guess what I want.
Trust me, I know exactly
what I want from you.
Well, what do you want?
("MORNING SEX" BY RALPH CASTELLI
PLAYING)
Wake up and we touching ♪
But I can't feel ♪
I got too many problems
I put off ♪
Oh, wait, are there any last things
I should know? Any dos or don'ts?
I think a great don't right now
would be talking.
- Okay. Got it.
- Yeah.
About your body. ♪
♪
Uh, hey, Professor Miller,
do we have any bigger scrub caps?
I think they're one-size-fits-all.
Oh, yeah, that's
what it says on the box,
but, um, these don't fit over my braids.
Oh. Okay, sorry about that.
Um, haven't encountered this before.
Um, I'll get them ordered,
uh, but maybe for today, you
just, you know, sit this one out
and observe from a distance.
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- Cool.
- Yeah.
♪
Sorry. Office hours are reserved
for my actual students.
You got a sec?
Sure. You already called
my career "pointless."
Why don't I show you
pictures of my kids?
You can rip on them, too.
I deserve that.
Uh, no, I was actually kind of hoping
I could get your take on, like,
the Black experience and STEM studies?
If there's anything to know there.
(LAUGHING): If there's anything to
Whitney, why do you
think I called on you in class
when I was talking
about Katherine Johnson?
To mess with me?
Well, it became that.
But I called on you
because it applied
to what you told me before.
How you're this STEM girl
and you don't have space
for all this Af-Am in your life.
I know it's not the 1960s,
but don't you think
there still might be
some merit to learning
about the Black people in science
that came before you
and the challenges they faced?
That does make sense.
Our history is linked
to any career we choose.
Even that of a lowly African
American studies professor.
I really am sorry.
Don't say it with words.
If I could, I'd like to stay
in your class.
What about that double major?
Mm, that is not quite where I'm at.
- (CHUCKLES)
- All right.
Well, I will get you to a minor.
I'm not above embarrassing you
in class again to get my way.
Oh, I know. (CHUCKLES)
Thank you.
("SUMMER SIMMER" BY ORANG UTAN
FEAT. WEST ROSE PLAYING)
Give me one good reason
to stay today ♪
BELA: I don't know
how else to put this,
but who are you?
I'm Kacey,
and if you ever forget,
just look at my pillows,
my towels, or my bedazzled tumbler cup.
Well, it's nice to meet you.
I'm Whitney.
- That's Bela and Kimberly.
- (KIMBERLY GASPS)
Should we play a game to help
you remember our names better?
Everybody pick an adjective with
the same letter as your name.
I'm Kooky Kimberly.
That's so nice, but I have to go
meet up with my boyfriend.
You found a boyfriend already?
Oh, no, we were already dating.
I transferred here to be with him.
Oh, that's so sweet.
Yeah, we've been together
since seventh grade.
- Oh.
- The hardest day of my life
is when we got our
college acceptance letters.
He got into Essex and I didn't.
So I went to Duke, we did long-distance,
and I tried as I could to stand out
as a transfer applicant and I got in.
That's like Cinderella. (CHUCKLES)
Seventh grade?
Sorry, I got stuck back there.
You can't control when you find love.
I'm sorry, are you engaged?
Oh, no, it's more serious than that.
It's a promise ring.
Calvin and I are saving
ourselves for marriage.
Holy shit, so you're a virgin?
Sorry, I think I said that too loud.
You did.
What are your boyfriends' names?
We're uncommitted at the moment.
Oh, I'm sorry.
No, it's more of like
a proud feminist thing.
Oh, I'm a feminist, too.
I'm a girly girl, through and through.
Is that the same thing?
Well, I better get going.
Do you want me to show you
around campus on your way?
I know the prettiest places.
And if you like ivy as much as I
do, do I have the pergola for you.
Oh, I'll be fine.
I really won't even be around that much.
I'll be with Calvin, like,
almost all the time.
But it was really nice to meet
you, Whitney, Bela and Kooky.
- Oh, that's not my
- (DOOR CLOSES)
Is it me or was she
super nice and smiley
but also a total bitch?
Wasn't just you.
I feel bad about myself.
Won't you dance with me,
dance with me ♪
Know how it feels
all the time ♪
'Cause I've been up dancing
alone, up dancing all night ♪
I want it, oh-oh. ♪
Okay. Mm. (GRUNTS)
Just so you know,
I really do need to study.
That wasn't just an excuse
to get you up here.
Okay, there is no need to apologize.
Stopping a hookup to study
is literally the hottest thing
you could for me.
(CHUCKLES) Okay.
I've never been with a bi guy before.
Oh.
Sorry, was that weird?
No, no. It's all good.
Uh, being cool with talking about
it sort of comes with the territory.
At least for me.
It's usually girls
who have a harder time.
Like, casual stuff, they're
fine, but then dating?
How so?
Well, a lot of straight girls think
that they can handle dating a bi guy
- Uh-huh.
- But then they sort of freak out.
You know, they're worried that
I'm secretly seeing a guy on the side
or that I'm gay and I haven't
fully come out yet,
a lot of stereotypes.
I, for one, am outraged.
And on behalf of straight women
everywhere, I am sorry.
Very progressive.
I'm nothing if not an ally.
I actually always thought
that the "B" in LGBTQ
should come first, BLGBTQ.
You said "B" twice.
And I'm fine with that.
So have most of your longer
relationships been with guys?
Yeah.
Yeah, I was with my ex for 18 months.
Oh. And what was he like?
He was fine. We're still friends.
- That's him.
- (GASPS)
- Wow, he's very attractive.
- Mm-hmm.
He actually kind of looks like my ex.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- I mean, not not.
- (LAUGHS)
Oh, my God, Eli.
Do we have the same taste in guys?
That's fun.
Below our knees ♪
It's ya backyard, shorty. ♪
Hey.
How was it?
A drug and alcohol counselor
spoke to me for five minutes,
handed me a pamphlet
and asked if I know Adele.
And you said?
Obviously I don't know Adele.
ARVIND: Bela!
BELA: Arvind.
Aw, you didn't have to get me
a box of chocolates.
Oh, I didn't.
I know. I was joking.
Oh. Oh! (LAUGHS)
- That's funny.
- It wasn't, though.
But no, I actually got this for
the bursar's assistant, Margaret.
She's recovering from a hip replacement.
I mean, not that she needed it.
She was pretty hip to begin with.
(ARVIND CHUCKLES)
- That's good.
- Yeah, I know.
I didn't come up with it.
I got it from hospitalpuns.com.
BELA: Well, I really like it.
Anyway, have a great day.
Okay, you are deeply bad at flirting.
Uh, I was not flirting with Arvind.
He's not the type of guy I go after.
My two types are like Jason Momoa
and small comedy men
who look like Rachel Maddow.
I think you should ask him
to lunch or something.
You can talk about your nerdy
desires to help other people.
You're the person I'm helping.
And yet, I'm unmoved. Hmm.
He's leaving
- What are you gonna do?
- (EXHALES)
BELA: Uh, Arvind?
Would you, uh, maybe want to grab lunch?
And talk FAF stuff,
give me a few pointers?
- I would love that.
- Yeah?
I'll message you.
I will message you right back.
- (BIKE BELL JINGLES)
- Beep, beep, beep.
KIMBERLY: Ooh, we're
getting our first papers back.
(GASPS) I got a C?
Actually, it's good.
I'm here first and foremost to learn.
I am a humble student
of the African American
studies experience.
It's not racist to be bummed
about a bad grade.
- Okay.
- Hmm.
"A+. See me."
What the hell does that mean?
Why would I need to see her
if I got a perfect grade?
Uh, Professor Phillips?
Just so you know,
I didn't cheat or anything.
I mean, I've only used ChatGPT one time,
and it was to help my mom write jokes
for a chili cook-off she hosted.
I didn't think you cheated.
At least not until
about two seconds ago.
(CHUCKLES)
But that's not why I
wanted to talk to you.
I thought your paper
was thoughtful and smart
and it had such a clear perspective.
I loved it.
Oh. Well, thanks. (CHUCKLES)
I really think you should consider
African American studies
as a possible major.
Uh, wow, that's so nice, uh,
but I'm already majoring in STEM, so
Yeah, definitely not.
Well, there's always a double major.
Totally, but, yeah, no.
Uh, STEM lab work is a lot,
and I also play soccer, so
I just don't know if that's
really, like, worth it.
Not worth it?
Just 'cause, like,
STEM leads to jobs?
Hmm.
No, Af-Am does, too, uh,
just not as much.
Well, I mean, like,
you clearly have a job.
And I'm sure it's rewarding.
I mean, not, like, financially
but in other ways.
No, I mean I'm-I'm happy for you
and the your job you have.
Thanks for that, Whitney.
I'm so glad I asked you to come see me.
You can go.
Yeah.
Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
I know you think
that I'm a lie. ♪
BELA: I'm meeting up for
lunch with this guy tomorrow.
- Oh, shit.
- Ooh.
- Are you not excited?
- I'm not sure.
I-I feel like I want to like him,
but he has this one thing about him
that's, like, my biggest turnoff.
He's nice.
Wait, that's the turnoff?
What, you don't like
nice people? I'm nice.
I like nice people.
I just don't like nice guys, sexually.
It's a boner killer.
Are we seriously
not all aligned on this?
You thought we would agree with you?
This is crazy to me.
Okay, you're watching Aladdin.
Who's the hottest character?
The answer is Aladdin.
The answer is Jafar.
He's so much hotter.
Aladdin's singing songs
and giving apples to babies.
Jafar knows what he wants
and he takes it.
- Mm.
- Okay, I don't like that.
Okay, I'll give you another example.
You're watching Hercules
We don't need another example.
And why are they all animated?
My point is, nice guys
are nice to everyone.
But getting the attention of a bad boy?
That makes you feel special.
Bela, I've seen you
get horny for a tree.
I'm pretty sure you can go
on a date with a nice guy.
I was not horny for a tree.
I just said it had muscular roots.
Okay, I am too hungry to handle
this. Can you take this one?
Maybe seeing a nice guy
is good for you right now.
Just give him a chance
and see what happens.
Fine.
But can I please
share my Hercules thought?
- If it's important to you.
- It is.
So, Hades is never shirtless
in the movie,
but if you look closely
Oh, hey, you three.
This is my boyfriend Calvin.
And these are my roommates
Whitney, Bela and Kooky.
Actually, it's Kimberly. I
meant to clear that up earlier.
- Oh.
- Would you like to sit with us?
Oh, it's okay.
Calvin and I are gonna find
a private spot to eat alone,
but enjoy your little girls' night.
Little girls' night? Okay, that time
she was definitely
being mean to us, right?
- Holy shit, you guys.
- What?
I think I saw Calvin
at a party last year
hooking up with some other girl.
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
- Are you sure?
- I'm pretty sure it was him.
And they were definitely kissing.
We have to tell her, right?
Whoa, hold on. You don't even seem sure.
Also, she might not even want to know.
I wouldn't want to know.
It's more peaceful to be clueless.
I agree with Bela.
- You do?
- You do?
Yeah, I mean, Kacey is basically
a complete stranger to us.
You wouldn't want your life upended by,
I don't know,
that random girl back there.
My friend Nell?
Okay, didn't know you knew her,
but you get what I'm saying.
We shouldn't tell her.
I see your point.
You should meet Nell, though.
She's very cool
and she has an air fryer.
Oh, shit. Okay, Nell.
(CHUCKLES)
♪
PHILLIPS: During Katherine
Johnson's 33-year career
I'm telling you, she hates me.
She hasn't looked at me once.
She can't look at everyone in the class.
Trust me, I've been sitting here
at attention like a meerkat
trying to get a moment with her myself.
Sure, but you
didn't accidentally insult
her entire set of life choices.
Okay, you got to let this go.
There's no way it bothered her.
Whitney Chase. Care to comment on that?
Uh, comment on what?
On who I was just talking about.
Oh. Oh.
Oh, them.
Um, they're great. Yeah, just
overall very inspiring.
And
I think I can speak for everyone
when I say thank you for
you know, telling us about they.
And who were we talking about?
- (COUGHS): Katherine Johnson.
- Magic Johnson.
(LAUGHTER)
Magic Johnson
and his involvement in Project Mercury?
Any other basketball players
help us get to space?
Maybe the cast of Space Jam?
(LAUGHTER)
Project Mercury was the first
U.S. human spaceflight program.
And it was successful in part
thanks to orbital mathematician
Katherine Johnson.
And tonight you can write me
a two-page paper
on the differences between her
and the greatest point guard
of all time.
MAN: Magic Johnson's not the greatest!
What? This is not up for debate.
- (LAUGHTER)
- WOMAN: What about Luka?
- Luka? Get out of my class.
- (LAUGHTER)
All right, you guys, settle down.
Let's get back into it.
At least she looked at you.
♪
LILA: Keep it sweeping, Cinderella.
Girl, why are you looking
at your phone so sad?
KIMBERLY: Yesterday Eli showed
me a photo of one of his exes,
and it was like this ripped muscle guy.
- Ooh.
- And at first I was like (GASPS) "Ah,
we have the same taste in men,
that's cute."
- Weird. Okay, continue.
- But now I'm on his page, and it's like,
he's been with a bunch
of guys like that,
but, like, no one who looks like me.
- Ah.
- And so I'm starting to feel
a little insecure about
how different I'd be
in sexual matters.
- Let me see one of these exes.
- Oh.
Oh, wait. Eli used to fuck with Jared?
I know him from Grindr.
- You're on Grindr?
- Yes.
And Scruff and Sniffies.
I use all gay hookup apps
for friendships.
Hell, I've met gay men on Google Sheets.
Okay, so what do you think?
Am I probably just, like, in my head
and it's nothing for me to worry about?
No, you probably should.
- Seriously?
- Bitch, I'm agreeing with you.
That guy looks like he can do
a thousand pushups.
You look like you struggle
to push open heavy doors.
Your bodies are different.
What? Okay, well, what can I do?
Let me give you some advice
from my upcoming book about sex
that I've not yet begun to write.
Now that you've seen what he's used to,
you got to play to your partner.
WOMAN: Hi, uh,
- can I have a cold brew?
- Just a sec.
Your romantic, ladylike,
Jane Austen-style sex
ain't gonna do shit for him.
He's experienced.
You got to be surprising, adventurous.
Suck a toe. Hell, suck a foot.
Am I right, Canaan?
Do not suck a foot.
He knows nothing about men.
If he's used to being with a Jared,
you got to give him a little Jared.
Trust me, I'm the Goddess of Grindr,
and, yes, that is my screen name.
Huh.
Oh.
Oh, shoot, did the customer leave?
So I said, "Toby, it's okay.
Sometimes I get homesick, too."
And before I knew it,
we were both crying.
- It was really cathartic.
- Mm.
What's your favorite thing
about being a FAF?
Have you shared any good cries yet?
Oh, crap.
Uh, I just remembered,
I have this thing I have to do.
- Oh.
- I'm sorry.
- Hi, Bela.
- All right.
Carla.
- Hi.
- I know we haven't talked yet this year,
and I just wanted to tell you,
whatever you've got going on,
I hope it's going well.
Thanks. You, too.
- It's going great.
- (LAUGHS SOFTLY)
Chicken nugget day.
- (CHUCKLES)
- (GRUNTS)
Are you okay? Are you?
- What's going on? Oh.
- (COUGHING)
Okay, she's choking.
Hey, everyone, stand back.
- Ma'am, consent to touch you?
- (STUDENTS MURMURING)
Okay. (GRUNTS)
(STUDENTS GASPING)
("FIRE IN MY HEAD" BY TWO FEET PLAYING)
(DISTORTED SHOUT)
Girl, I don't want
nobody else ♪
(BOTH MOANING)
You say. ♪
(RETCHES)
(CARLA PANTING)
Are you okay?
- I'm okay.
- She's okay.
- (CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
- So
CARLA: You saved my life.
- I'm feeling it ♪
- It happened.
I'm horny for nice.
I ♪
- I'm feeling it. ♪
- (ENTRY BELL JINGLES)
Good afternoon.
Or, I guess it's almost evening.
Good almost evening.
I was just walking by,
running some local errands,
and I realized I'd never been
inside this store.
What a wonderful collection
of goods you have.
So colorful.
First time in a sex shop?
Yes. Although, in middle school,
my friends and I did run through
the adult section
- of a DVD store.
- And how was that?
I kept my eyes closed
and bumped into a wall.
- Hmm.
- (GASPS) Oh, this looks nice.
And I need some new moisturizer.
My hands get so dry here
during the winter.
- That's ass lube.
- Oh.
You don't have to be nervous.
Sex is part of life, and this is a place
where you can buy things
to help with that.
- Mm.
- In that way we're no different
than, like, Best Buy or Target.
There's a rack
of edible underwear behind you.
Okay, we're a little bit different.
Sounds like you're here
for a specific reason.
How can I help?
I want the guy I'm seeing
to think I'm adventurous.
Are you allergic to latex
or any other textures?
No, but I'm allergic
to cashews and penicillin.
I don't think that will be a problem,
so let me show you around.
♪
(OVERLAPPING SHOUTING)
Whoo!
(SIGHS)
(PANTING)
(CHEERING)
- (WHISTLE BLOWS)
- That's practice, ladies.
Whitney.
- Can I talk to you?
- Yeah. What's up?
I want to try something
different for our next game.
How do you feel about me
moving Rina to center?
Well, that's my position.
No, right, it's just
you're so versatile,
you can play anywhere,
but Rina seems to particularly
thrive at center.
If this is about today's
practice, I know I was off,
but I've just been tired
and busy with classes.
Don't overthink it. It's just strategy.
It's gonna be for the best, I promise.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
♪
(DOOR OPENS)
Are you okay?
Whatever you're mad at,
it's accentuating your 11s.
Relax your face or they will stick.
Thanks, Kacey.
I'm surprised you're even here.
Oh, I know, it's like,
"Does she even live here?
Basically just to sleep.
Otherwise she's at C's place."
That's what I call Calvin. "C."
Isn't that cute?
What happened?
That first-year Rina took my position.
They moved me to wing.
KIMBERLY: Whitney, no.
The worst part is, it's my fault.
I-I'm tired because I put
too much on my plate
between classes and labs.
But I know what I need to do.
HGH?
No, I'm dropping a class.
Bye-bye, Af-Am.
You can't. That's our class.
The professor hates me.
She keeps giving me extra assignments.
Look, I'm just gonna
email her right now.
"I regretfully have decided
I must drop your class."
Send. Done.
Well, I support the dropping
of any and all classes,
and I will be celebrating with you
by getting drunk tonight at Omega.
- Hell yeah.
- KACEY: Oh, I wish I could join,
but Calvin's staying in to study,
so I'm just gonna take
some time for myself.
That's nice.
Sometimes, when I want to relax,
I just get into child's pose
and listen to a nice, long podcast.
Oh, no, I meant tinting my brows,
lifting my lashes,
glossing my highlights,
whitening my teeth,
and deep-hydrating my neck.
Y'all are so funny, though.
- Ah.
- ARVIND: Knock, knock. Hey.
Arvind, what are you doing here?
You mentioned you were out
of roommate complaint forms,
so I thought I'd come by
and drop some off.
Hi, everyone, I'm Arvind.
- Hi.
- BELA: Aw,
you didn't have to come all the way here
- for that.
- Oh.
That's so nice of you.
ARVIND: Oh, it's no biggie
at all. I had to come over
by this way anyway to meet up
with my girlfriend later, so
Oh. You have a girlfriend.
ARVIND: Yeah. Oh, you would love her.
Her name is Emily.
She's a FAF, too.
I mean, she's way cooler than me.
Get this: she plays
pop songs on the cello.
Hmm.
It's good to meet you all.
- Have a good rest of your day.
- (CHUCKLES)
I'm sorry, Bela.
That's what happens
when you like an Aladdin.
She's allowed to say that.
Mm-hmm.
Teaching our minds
to be smarter ♪
(BOTH MOANING)
Oh, you are so hot.
You, too.
Oh.
You down?
I'm down.
I'm so down.
(PANTS UNZIP)
Turn over.
What?
I said, "Turn over."
I think I'm good this way.
I went to the store
and I got you something.
I, um
I get what you're hinting at,
but it's just not something I want.
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
- Oh
- It's fine.
This is so embarrassing.
- Well
- Uh, I'm just
I'm gonna go.
You don't have to go.
Uh, I'm fine, I just yeah.
(DEVICE VIBRATING)
Goddamn it. Oh
Stop. Stop.
(DOOR CLOSES)
Ready, here we go ♪
Speeding up, I'm in control ♪
I'm always in the zone ♪
Stepping into the unknown ♪
- You did what?
- Why would you take Lila's advice?
- Lila's usually right.
- Literally when?
Maybe she just says things
louder than everyone else.
- Yes.
- Yeah, she does. Look,
I know you like this guy,
and I think you can fix it.
You just need to talk to him.
That's the only way to know
what he likes or doesn't like.
Or I could preemptively ghost
him before he ghosts me.
You can't ghost a ghost.
I know you're right. I'll talk to him.
Look, we've all had rough days,
so let's just take a breath
and appreciate that we are at a party
with muscly lacrosse boys
of wildly different heights.
WHITNEY: Agree.
- Should we get a drink?
- Yes.
You won't regret it ♪
Uh, yeah, you guys go ahead.
I'm gonna check up on Taylor.
- Okay.
- To the left, to the right like ♪
Drip drop ♪
Like when I hit it
with that ♪
Oh, shit. Is that Kacey's boyfriend?
(GASPS) Calvin?
Isn't he supposed to be studying?
WHITNEY: He's definitely studying
- her ass with his hands.
- I can't believe it.
I mean, it's possible they're
just grinding as friends,
like platonic grinding.
(KIMBERLY GASPS)
I knew it! Kacey's Calvin's a slut.
You'll hear from me.
Better.
I'm turnin' up the heat ♪
Till we sweatin'
through the sheets ♪
I always roll the dice ♪
That girl was hot. What was her name?
Oh, I have no idea.
I'm just saving her on my phone
as Hot Blonde with today's date.
I have a system.
What you drinking?
Cup full of vodka with a splash of rum.
It's sparkling water.
Girl, I don't know if I'm
supposed to check on you.
Honestly, it's fine.
I'm not even craving alcohol.
I'm too focused on my new goal.
Making out with all
of the women on this campus.
Can I help you with something?
Arvind has a girlfriend.
The nerd on the bike?
- That's quite surprising.
- (SIGHS)
- I'm sorry.
- Yeah.
I don't know much about her.
Except for what I found out
scrolling all the way back
to the beginning
of her Instagram account.
Oh, okay, you are
way cuter than this girl.
Thank you.
I did intentionally choose to
show you her worst photo, but still
I appreciate it.
It sucks to finally find a guy
who would treat me well
and he's unavailable.
Universe is a cruel bitch.
Nut up.
Make him realize
he should want you, too.
Here's what you do.
Send him a text saying,
"I can't wait to be
in your bed tonight."
Then send him another being like,
"Whoops, sorry, I meant that
for somebody else."
Once he reads that,
he'll imagine you naked
and bye-bye, girlfriend.
Last year I for sure
would have done that
- and added three nudes, but
- (PHONE CHIMES)
trying to make different choices.
I'm heading out.
- Is that the girl from before?
- Yes.
Maybe.
It's definitely a girl from before.
My system's not perfect.
♪
(SIGHS)
Bela. Bela, guess who's here. Calvin.
And he's making out with someone
who isn't Kacey.
Shit. All right, we might need
to tell Kacey.
- Where is he?
- Kacey, hi.
Ooh.
How's your self-care night going?
Kooky told me.
I texted her. She deserves to know.
So you're just responding to Kooky now.
BELA: Okay, Kacey, I know you're upset,
but let-let's take a minute.
You might not want to make a scene.
Obviously, we're gonna go watch.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Kacey? Uh, what are you doing here?
- And, um, what's in your hair?
- Don't talk about my hair!
Is this true? Are you cheating on me?
Calm down. You're being crazy.
Oh, he did not just tell her to
calm down and call her crazy.
I'm not cheating. We were just dancing.
Uh, he's lying. I saw them kissing
and I'm pretty sure I saw him
kissing someone last year.
KACEY: Oh, my God.
I transferred here for you.
I-I'm sorry, baby.
Just, long distance
was really hard for me.
(GASPS) Was it? Oh!
I am so sorry
that you had to go through that alone
being the only one doing it.
How far did this go?
Please, please tell me
that you didn't
You had sex with someone?
While I'm wearing
a promise ring you gave me?
I know it's wrong, but my dad is
a pastor and he forgave me.
Well, you and your ugly priest dad
can suck it.
We are so done.
Kacey, maybe we should go.
Uh-uh, he's the one who should go.
CALVIN: I'm not going anywhere.
KACEY: If you don't leave,
I am going to make a huge fucking scene!
Okay, fine. I'll go.
And you know that part of your
body you're insecure about?
It is weird!
Thank you so much for texting me.
And thank you, too, for having my back.
You don't even know me
and you looked out for me.
Of course. You're our roommate.
Yeah. We got you.
But, uh, you don't actually
want to stay here, do you?
No, I've literally never
looked worse in public.
Can you please shield me
all the way home?
- We can do that.
- Okay.
- BELA: Look away, keep drinking.
- WHITNEY: Sorry, excuse us.
♪
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
Hey. Sorry for stopping by so late.
That's not late. I was just
about to head out for a party.
A party that starts now?
Who's hosting it?
A frat run by possums?
Uh can we talk?
- Yeah. Come in.
- Thanks.
I wanted to apologize for before.
I think I did the thing you said
a lot of straight girls do.
Yeah, you did.
Well, actually, no straight
girl's ever done what you did.
That was next-level.
- Mm. Mm-hmm.
- Mm.
It's really simple.
Me being bi doesn't mean
you have to change a thing
about your sex life.
You don't have to overthink it.
I just wanted to be
a really awesome ally girl.
And I promise you can do that
without pegging me.
Yeah.
You don't have to guess what I want.
Trust me, I know exactly
what I want from you.
Well, what do you want?
("MORNING SEX" BY RALPH CASTELLI
PLAYING)
Wake up and we touching ♪
But I can't feel ♪
I got too many problems
I put off ♪
Oh, wait, are there any last things
I should know? Any dos or don'ts?
I think a great don't right now
would be talking.
- Okay. Got it.
- Yeah.
About your body. ♪
♪
Uh, hey, Professor Miller,
do we have any bigger scrub caps?
I think they're one-size-fits-all.
Oh, yeah, that's
what it says on the box,
but, um, these don't fit over my braids.
Oh. Okay, sorry about that.
Um, haven't encountered this before.
Um, I'll get them ordered,
uh, but maybe for today, you
just, you know, sit this one out
and observe from a distance.
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- Cool.
- Yeah.
♪
Sorry. Office hours are reserved
for my actual students.
You got a sec?
Sure. You already called
my career "pointless."
Why don't I show you
pictures of my kids?
You can rip on them, too.
I deserve that.
Uh, no, I was actually kind of hoping
I could get your take on, like,
the Black experience and STEM studies?
If there's anything to know there.
(LAUGHING): If there's anything to
Whitney, why do you
think I called on you in class
when I was talking
about Katherine Johnson?
To mess with me?
Well, it became that.
But I called on you
because it applied
to what you told me before.
How you're this STEM girl
and you don't have space
for all this Af-Am in your life.
I know it's not the 1960s,
but don't you think
there still might be
some merit to learning
about the Black people in science
that came before you
and the challenges they faced?
That does make sense.
Our history is linked
to any career we choose.
Even that of a lowly African
American studies professor.
I really am sorry.
Don't say it with words.
If I could, I'd like to stay
in your class.
What about that double major?
Mm, that is not quite where I'm at.
- (CHUCKLES)
- All right.
Well, I will get you to a minor.
I'm not above embarrassing you
in class again to get my way.
Oh, I know. (CHUCKLES)
Thank you.
("SUMMER SIMMER" BY ORANG UTAN
FEAT. WEST ROSE PLAYING)