The Suite Life of Zack & Cody s01e09 Episode Script

Band in Boston

And wait for the bell if it doesn't ring soon, I'm gonna yell school's out let's rock and roll school's out gonna lose control guys! Recess never ends school's out Hello! And I got in trouble too much homework, I'm seeing double my mom-- Tapeworm! Hey, what's the big idea? We need to practice for battle of the bands.
Yeah, they're holding it here at the tipton.
And the winner Which is gonna be us.
Gets to cut a demo cd.
Listen-- we're gonna become rock stars.
And perform all over the world.
Yeah! Guys, you're gonna have to practice someplace else.
There have been some complaints.
Who? Everybody in Boston.
But don't worry.
I have the perfect place for you to rehearse.
School's out let's rock and roll school's out gonna lose control-- Aw, not again.
I can't work with these constant interruptions.
Sorry, boys.
I'm a girl.
Whatever.
We've had some complaints about the noise.
But worry not, I have a place where your band can jam it to the Max.
School's out let's rock and roll school's out gonna lose control school's out recess never ends school's out party with my friends, school's out Whoo! Awesome! One more time! 1, 2, 3, I missed the bus as it came around and during gym class my pants fell down here I am in your life here you are in mine yes, we have a suite life most of the time you and me, we got the world to see so come on down just me and you know what to do so come on down just you and me and me and you we got the whole place to ourselves you and me, we got it all for free so come on down this is the suite life we've got a suite life Hit me with some sugar, sweet thing.
I'd rather hit you with some deodorant.
What is that smell? My band has to practice in the laundry room.
The place reeks like old underwear, but the acoustics are great! You guys have a band? Yeah.
The codester and I have put together a little group we like to call rock squared.
We're gonna win the battle of the bands.
Yeah? Or come in second since we're gonna be in the battle of the bands, too.
We? What's we? Who's we? Lance and I.
That dopey lifeguard who works here? He happens to be a really good musician.
Please.
It took him 3 hours to learn how to blow his whistle.
Whatever.
He has a band called waterworks, and I'm the lead singer.
So you're going to compete against us? Looks like it.
Gee, I kind of feel bad for you.
Our band has great music, a killer wardrobe, and we're also 12 and cute.
Yeah, well, I'm 15 and hot.
Ooh.
You are good.
There you are.
We've been rehearsing for half an hour.
How was I? Don't you know the meaning of the word "punctual"? No.
That explains it.
Come on.
Hey, Lance.
Our band is gonna pound you guys into dust.
All that will be left of you will be your guitar picks.
Ok.
Well, good luck with that.
Hi.
We still rehearsing tonight? I don't think so.
Lars spilled some water on 2 of our amps and all our instruments.
Oh, no.
Everything's, like, wet and, like, not working.
I thought water was good, but I guess it has a dark side, too.
Well, how much do you need to replace everything? About $5,000.
Without it, waterworks is down the toilet.
Wow.
5 grand? Nobody's got that kind of money.
[Laughs.]
"Nobody's got that kind of money.
" That's cute.
Ha ha! Oh, you were serious? Yeah.
Without equipment, we can't compete in the battle of the bands.
Well, if that's all you need to get your band up and running, I could take care of it.
Awesome.
And what would you want in return? Oh, nothing really.
Just put me in your band.
Absolutely not.
You're in.
1, 2, 3, I missed the bus as it came around and during gym class [Blows whistle.]
[Sighs.]
Now what? I can't understand the words.
What I wrote is "I missed the bus as it came around.
" Who cares? I do.
SCHOOL'S OUT IS AN EXPOS of the trials and tribulations endemic to the public school experience.
Do you know what he just said? Yeah.
He never gets girls.
Duh.
What do you think of my dance? Tapeworm: HA HA! AWESOME.
I think less flailing and more enunciating.
[Overenunciating.]
School is out.
Let us rock and roll.
Ha ha! [Blows whistle.]
And there goes the whistle.
The only one, yeah the only one What happened? We're kind of done, you know, with the song.
Well, how was I supposed to know? Everyone else stopped? I don't like this tangerine.
NO, THAT IS A TAMBOURINE.
A tangerine is what the audience is gonna throw at you.
I want to do something else.
Like what? I want to sing.
I think we should let her do it.
Ha ha! Have you swallowed too much chlorine? Well, yeah, but I still think we should let her try.
She could sing backup.
London, let's hear you sing.
Ahem.
[Off-key.]
you're the one I want the only one I need the only one for me I think I've lost sight in my right eye.
Is something dying in here? Yes Our chances of winning.
Yo, peeps, what's up? Rehearsal.
Where have you been? Shopping.
What do you think of my new outfit? I think Halloween was last month.
Dude, this is my rock star look.
There are other things important to a band besides the music.
Is one of them dressing like a circus monkey? I think Zack looks cool.
Thank you.
It doesn't matter how he looks if my song doesn't sound good.
[Scoffs.]
Who cares about your silly song? Silly song?! John Jacob JINGLEHEIMER SCHMIDT is a silly song.
SCHOOL'S OUT IS AN ANTHEM that speaks to generations of outcasts-- give it a rest.
You rest enough for everyone.
Would you two stop fighting? We are not fighting, we're having a creative discussion.
We are too fighting! Creative discussion.
Fight.
Discussion.
Fight.
I can't believe you're actually having a fight about if you're having a fight.
Tapeworm, help me here.
I'm on my pudding break.
Break over.
You got pudding in my whistle! And you got whistle in my pudding.
I'm sick of you people and your lack of discipline.
Well, we're sick of your bossy attitude.
Fine! Then I'm gonna take my bossy attitude and my song and find a band who appreciates me.
Fine! Take your stupid song.
What's stupid is your outfit! Hey, that's pretty cool.
Ok, 1, 2, I hate Zack! I don't know that one.
Ok, what happened? I quit the band.
No one was listening to me, and all Zack cared about was how he looked.
Did I mention I hate him? It might have slipped out.
Honey, when you're in a band with other people, you have to work together.
I am.
They're just not working with me.
They all say I'm too bossy.
Did I ever tell you when I was in band yes.
And how we couldn't work together and eventually broke up? Yes.
And then your boyfriend stole your car and ran off with your best friend.
We don't need to relive that part.
The point is you can't always quit just 'cause people don't agree with you.
Quitters never prosper.
I thought cheaters never prosper.
What happens to quitters? Quitters never win and winners never quit.
Well, there you go.
So you agree.
No.
I'm right and it's all Zack's fault.
Thanks, mom! I--actually Well, I'll try again later.
Ok.
From the top.
I hate Cody! And we're off.
Let me guess.
Cody's annoying you.
I can't believe he saw my new clothes and didn't feel the magic.
All he cared about was his song.
Honey, as a singer, I have to say that when it comes to music, the song is kind of important.
Really? And how many different outfits have you tried on for your show tonight? [Sighs.]
Did I ever tell you about when I was in my first band? Yes.
And how we couldn't work together and eventually we broke up? Yes.
And then your boyfriend stole your car and-- yeah, ok.
And what can you take away from that story? You need to pick better men? And? That I was right and it's all Cody's fault! Thanks, mom.
You know, I feel better now.
I gotta get better stories.
Maddie and London: THE ONLY ONE, YEAH staring out the window, the rain falls hard I can't escape the feeling of drowning now beneath the river-- caught in the pouring rain of true-- London, you're a background singer.
But I don't like being in the back.
It's just so Not the front.
You know, this really isn't working for me.
Aww.
Well, thanks for giving it a try.
We'll let you know what we do at the contest.
No, no, no.
I want to sing up front With you where everyone can see me.
After all, I sing good.
No, it's you sing well.
Thank you, maddie.
Then it's settled.
No, it's not.
Let me tell you something, sister.
You gotta keep London happy, like the dolphin who merrily swims through the ocean and buys the other dolphins instruments.
I will not let her ruin our chances to win.
Dudette, you're pinching my skin.
Sorry.
But this is important to me.
With this demo, I can become a star and once I'm a star, I can pay for law school.
Ok.
Well, how about this? We let London stand up front, but we turn off her Mike so no one can hear her.
Wow, I'm impressed.
I can't believe you came up with that idea, Lance.
You know what they say.
No, what? I don't know, I was hoping you would.
How hard can it be to write a song? I'm almost there.
What rhymes with "orange"? Nothing.
Everybody knows nothing rhymes with "orange.
" Oh, yeah? What about Norange? Thank you, Dr.
Seuss.
Zachary.
Codery.
What are you doing here? Getting my sheet music for my band.
Oh, you finally found somebody who responds to a whistle? Yes, and they're awesome.
Hurry up, Cody.
I'm ready to rock out! What in the world is that? You like it? Used to be a leaf blower.
I call it a sax-a-blower.
[Plays off-key.]
[Leaf blower turns on.]
[Turns off.]
[Coughs.]
Your band is arwin and Muriel? Do you see how insane this whole thing is? It's his fault! NO, IT'S NOT! IT'S HIS FAULT! It's both your faults.
This is one band, and it needs Zack's style and Cody's song.
So you two hurry up and work it out or I'll beat you like a pinata.
But what about our band? It's broken up.
[Sighs.]
First mother and the butcher and now this.
[PLAYS TAPS.]
[Leaf blower turns on.]
[Crash.]
Max, we have to go downstairs and set up.
Muriel, let Zack and Cody out of the closet in 10 minutes.
But I really wanted to get my groove thang on.
La la la la la la la la la la la la la [High-pitched, off-key.]
la Better and better every day, London.
Thank you.
Break a leg That way she won't be able to get up onstage.
Ok, did you turn London's microphone off? Hey, great idea.
Couldn't have done it without you.
Done what? It's a good thing you're cute.
Zack: YOU KNOW, THIS STINKS.
We could've won that contest if you hadn't been a jerk and quit.
I quit because you were being a jerk.
YOU'RE THE JERK! NO, YOU'RE THE JERK! Mom said I was right.
SHE SAID I WAS RIGHT.
Mom's losing it.
At least we agree on something.
Look, you have to admit you were acting a little bossy.
I had to be bossy because you were goofing off! I wasn't goofing off.
I was just trying to find our look.
I wanted us to be the best band ever.
So did I.
Well, at least that's Here's another one: If we don't get out of this closet, we're never gonna win the contest.
I agree.
Let's get out of here.
I agree.
Ok, stop agreeing.
You're annoying me now.
Want to get really annoyed? The door's locked! Both: LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! [Snores.]
[Rock and roll song ends.]
Announcer: THAT WAS LAST YEAR'S RUNNER-UP, Scarlet SPIDER.
And now, the battle of the bands continues with the tipton's own waterworks.
The only one, yeah the only one, yeah [Moaning.]
[Snores.]
Oh, no! They're gone! They've been sucked into a black hole, and they're hurtling through time and space.
Or they crawled through that vent.
Now let's not get carried away.
[PLAYS SWING LOW, SWEET CHARIOT.]
[Uses leaf blower.]
Aah! Aah! Aah! Whoa.
Good thing I landed on you or that could've hurt.
Yeah.
Lucky you.
SoYou're back.
Well, you can beg all you want, but I don't want to be in your lousy band.
Please, please, please let me be in your band! Sorry, arwin, we're rock squared.
We always will be.
Ahh! I wish I had a twin.
Maybe I can make one out of that leaf blower.
It doesn't make any difference because we're gonna miss the contest.
Maybe not.
You're in luck.
I was just about to do a test run on my new jet-propelled in-line skates.
WOW, THAT IS LUCKY! Yeah.
Ok.
I'm all right.
Incoming! All: AAH! I'm the one you want, the only one you need won't you take chances? you're the one I want, only one for me the only one I'm the one you want, only one you need [No audio.]
You're the one I want, only one for me the only one I need to use your Mike.
Use your own Mike.
Mine's isn't working.
Too bad.
The only one, yeah But I'm supposed to sing, too.
Not now.
Yes.
No.
only one, yeah Why not? The only one, yeah 'Cause you're a lousy singer! [Crowd gasps.]
London! What do we do? We're next and Zack and Cody still aren't here.
We'll do what all great rock stars do.
Trash our hotel room? We stall.
London.
London.
I'm sorry I embarrassed you up there.
Look, if you didn't want me in the band, why didn't you just tell me instead of humiliating me in front of all those people? Because we thought you would take your equipment away.
Well, I wouldn't have.
Really? Ok, maybe I would have.
See? But then you would've come to me with some sob story about how you needed the money for something stupid likeFood.
I should have told you from the beginning that you're not a very good singer.
A very well singer.
Right.
And then just dealt with the consequences, which would not have been as painful as this.
I'm sorry, London.
Apology accepted.
You know what's funny? Daddy owns a couple record companies and we could've made a cd anytime.
But now that you've told me what a lousy singer I am, what's the point? But you were so good on the tangerine! Yeah.
Why is it that you drive on the parkway but you park in the driveway? [Rimshot.]
[Crowd groans.]
What is this, an audience or a jury? Excuse me, excuse me.
Sorry.
Excuse me.
Max, where are Zack and Cody? Somewhere in the vent system.
Great.
'Cause a mother needs to know these things.
I don't know where they are.
They're somewhere in the vents.
Look out! I would if I could! I said it was a test run! Aah! Aah! I think I found them.
Zack and Cody in the house! [Applause.]
Hello, Boston! [Cheering.]
Yeah! 1, 2, 3 I missed the bus as it came around and during gym class, my pants fell down looked in my locker, couldn't find my books and now all the teachers gave me dirty looks came around with my backpack on then hittin' the books I stare at the clock and wait for the bell if it doesn't ring soon, I'm gonna yell school's out, let's rock and roll school's out Aah! Whoo! School's out, party with my friends school's out let's rock and roll school's out, gonna lose control school's out, recess never ends school's out, party with my friends school's out! [Cheering.]
Announcer: BY AUDIENCE REACTION, the winner is Rock scared! Thank you, Boston!
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