This is Us (2016) s06e18 Episode Script


1 Previously on This Is Us I don't see her making it through the night.
RANDALL: We're good now.
You made us good.
You tell him hey.
I'm pregnant.
You're gonna be a grandfather.
I'm not worried about forgetting about the big stuff.
It's the regular Saturday when the kids were little, a day when nothing big really happened.
We were just laughing and playing pin the tail on the donkey.
That's the stuff I'm not ready to let go of yet.
- Hey.
(TAKES DEEP BREATH) Did you know you have a tiny little scar - underneath your eyebrow? - Mm-hmm.
I never noticed it before.
(INHALES DEEPLY) It comes out when I'm in the sun, and I got a little sun the other day.
I can't believe I never noticed it.
(CLEARS THROAT) So - when I was a little girl - Mm-hmm.
there was this little playground right by my house that my dad would take me to sometimes, and it had one of those really lame slides that would give you burn marks on your butt.
- Oh, yeah.
- And, um, you know, one of those weird old rocking horse things that only had one eye.
The springy ones.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Totally creeped me out.
But then there was this one swing.
God, I loved that swing.
And he would push me on it.
And one time, I remember I turned around on the way back down, and my dad wasn't paying attention, and his watch clocked me right above the eye.
He felt so bad, but I didn't care because him pushing me in that swing was just my favorite thing in the entire world, you know? DAVE: And we swing.
It was such a treat for me, going there with him.
But I would just I'd spend the entire time worrying about when he would stop pushing me, when he'd say that it was time to go home.
Really wish that I had spent more time appreciating it when it was all happening, instead of just worrying about when it would end.
At least I still have the scar.
- Hmm.
- Um Randall's math thing got canceled today, so we have a completely free Saturday with no plans.
No football games, no playdates.
What should we do? Nothing.
- Nothing.
- Mm-hmm.
Oh, nothing sounds so nice.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
And swing, Rebecca.
And we swing.
- Ready, Randall? (WHOOPS) - Kate, touch the sky.
- And we swing! - Touch the sky with your feet.
There you go.
♪ - And we swing! - (CHUCKLES) - Higher! - And we swing! (BETH WHOOPS) (KEVIN LAUGHS) Swing.
Throw your arms up.
Ready? BOTH: Back and forth, and we swing! - And swing! - Swing.
- JACK: Mmm.
Okay, Mom's up.
- So since Randall's math contest got canceled - Mathletes.
- What? It's Mathletes, and it's not a contest.
It's a group of math enthusiasts who perform and compete at a, um Forget it.
I'll talk about it later.
- Go ahead.
- It just means we have a completely free Saturday.
Just us.
(GROANS) JACK: Oh, what? Come on.
Is it really that hard - to be all together for a day? - RANDALL AND KATE: Mm-hmm.
- Yes.
- (KATE SNICKERS) REBECCA: Okay, well, what do you guys want to do? - Whatever.
- KEVIN: Don't care.
(SCOFFS) O-Okay.
Katie girl, what do you got? Anything we want? - Mm-hmm.
- All day? Anything you want.
All day.
What do you got, Katie girl? - Several ideas.
- REBECCA: Oh, well, there we go.
Several ideas.
- Okay.
I like that.
- JACK: She's got ideas.
I like, I like people with several ideas.
(OVERLAPPING CHATTER) (RANDALL SIGHS) How's the writing coming? Slowly.
- Thanks.
- Service is in, uh, less than two hours.
I'm aware.
(SIGHS HEAVILY) What? Nothing.
I'm just checking on you.
I'm good.
(SCRIBBLING ON PAPER) (PEN CLATTERS) What, woman? I think we need to bang out a worst-case scenario.
- About what? - You.
You go first.
I don't even know what we're worst-case scenario-ing.
After burying your fourth and final parent, you lose it.
No parents left to bury, you spend the rest of your days going to other people's parents' funerals.
Just crying single tears at funerals of parents you don't even know.
I really don't think I'm gonna be going to You buy an RV.
(CLICKS TONGUE) Wake up one morning and say, "Beth, we need an RV.
" I say, "Sure, I can get down with an RV.
" You spend the rest of your days traveling back and forth between your parents' various resting places, just driving from tree to tree.
- Baby, I'm - Mind you, I didn't even mention Miguel.
I just realized that.
Maybe you realize it, too.
- You decide you need to go to Puerto Rico.
- (SCOFFS) Try and learn about his deceased great-grandmother's story, come back talking about swimming in the Atlantic Ocean with Miguel's great-grandmama's ghost.
- And I'm thinking to myself - Uh, Beth.
I'm okay.
I am appropriately sad, and I am appropriately anxious about this eulogy.
All right? I'm centered, and I'm looking forward to this quiet next chapter with my wife and our lives, and our eventual grandchildren.
Have you made a decision about deep-fried Oreos? (TAKES DEEP BREATH) Musing.
You? Same.
REBECCA: Hey, Bug, these lines looking straight enough to you? - Yep.
- Great.
I don't want to play four square with my parents.
It's lame.
Yeah, well, you should have contributed to the suggestions, then, Kev.
Kevin's right, this is stupid.
What is it with you two today? Hey, ladies.
Coming to check on your chalk work.
♪ REBECCA: Whoa.
Right? That was an assist.
That was an assist.
♪ (FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING) (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) If it's okay with you, I would like to say three things that will surely cross multiple ex-husband lines and protocols.
- Proceed.
- Okay.
Number one.
She was extraordinarily proud of you.
I am extraordinarily proud of you.
That was number two.
They get progressively more and more intense - as we go.
- Gotcha.
And the third one is a real doozy.
Today is a doozy.
So I love you, kid.
I love you.
And even though our marriage didn't go the distance, if Doc Brown showed up right now and offered me a ride in the DeLorean, I would go right back to that weight loss support group and make stupid faces at you.
(CHUCKLES) (DISTANT CHATTER AND LAUGHTER) That's a Back to the Future reference.
I know, I was married to you.
Yes, you were.
Yes, I was.
(DOOR OPENS) Kate? Kate.
Thought you wanted to watch the home movies next, right? It's raining pretty hard, huh? Hey, how about we play a game next weekend? Better yet, how about you play and I'll watch? I really just like being together.
Plus, only four people can play, and I just slow the game down.
That's okay.
I mean, all I want nowadays is to slow things down anyway.
Me, too.
Home movies? - Home movies.
- Okay.
(SIGHS) - KIDS: We love cake! - REBECCA: One, two, three.
Oh, wait.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
This-this is it.
- JACK: Uh-huh.
(DISHES CLATTER ON VIDEO) Come on, not on camera, please.
I'm a mess.
I'm covered in sauce.
Oh, yeah.
You know what? You're revolting, okay? - (CHUCKLES) - I I want to show you something that I've been working on.
Can I just finish the dishes first, please? Nope.
Get ready.
- Hey, Big Three.
Come on, come on.
Come on in, come on in.
Come on in.
Come on in.
(JACK LAUGHS) Come on in.
Come on in, Kev.
- Ready? - BIG THREE: Ready! REBECCA: Look at you guys.
How are you that little? - JACK: So tiny.
- Look how cute you were, Kev.
First came Me.
- JACK: And Dad said - "Gee.
" - JACK: And then came - Me.
- JACK: And Mom said - "We.
" - JACK: And then came - Me.
- JACK: And we said - "That's three.
" JACK: Big Three.
ALL: Big Three! Ah! Jack, are you kidding me? How long did that take? JACK: Oh, that was, uh that was l-less than potty training - but longer than the ABCs.
- (GASPS) You guys are so good! Come give me hugs.
- REBECCA: Little Kev.
- JACK: Yeah.
- REBECCA: Kev, look.
- Kevin, look.
REBECCA (ON VIDEO): Oh, my goodness.
You're so smart.
I've seen this like a million times.
- Yeah.
- (REBECCA SCOFFS) I'm gonna go upstairs.
Today sucks.
(CHATTER ON VIDEO CONTINUES) Two rays of sunshine.
Knock, knock.
- KEVIN: Go away.
- (SCOFFS) Uh-uh.
Enough, Kev.
Okay? Hey.
What's going on, bud? Yesterday we did the President Fitness thing.
I got the best time in the mile, and I did the most sit-ups.
I did just whatever on the sit and reach, but that's for girls anyway, so who cares.
So, what's the problem? I couldn't do any pull-ups.
I've just never been able to do them.
So you can't do a pull-up.
What's the big deal? I was just hanging there for, like, two minutes, and everyone was laughing.
At me.
They were laughing at me, Mom.
(CLEARS THROAT) First of all, I'm sure no one was laughing at you.
Maybe not.
Plus, I had Sophie tell a bunch of the girls that I was faking it, so all the unathletic kids didn't feel bad when they couldn't do one.
It played.
I really just couldn't do one, Mom.
But that's okay.
You know, not everything is gonna come easy to you.
♪ I think you're gonna have to work pretty hard to become the person I know you can become.
And it will make the big victories in life that much more special when you have to work a little harder for them.
Do you know what Dr.
Jaffey told us - when we went for your last checkup? - Hmm? He told us he thinks that you're gonna be really tall, like over six feet tall.
- Really? - Mm-hmm.
"A real jock," is what he said.
Oh, God.
That'd be so great.
(REBECCA SCOFFS) (SIGHS) I feel better.
Well, I'm glad.
I think.
(CHUCKLES): Actually, I I have no idea.
No, really, Mom.
- You always know what to say.
- I do? You're really good at this kind of stuff.
Thank you, Kev.
- You get one kiss.
- (GASPS) - KEVIN: Just one.
- REBECCA: I just get one kiss? - Yes.
- Okay.
Well, then obviously I'm gonna have to get more.
- Hey, stop it! Mom.
- (LAUGHING) (SIGHS) Can't believe I'm standing here.
My brother's wife's funeral.
You know before you came banging on the door of that trailer of mine, I had it pretty good, you know? I didn't care about anything.
You know, the good thing about not caring about anything is that you don't care when it's gone.
You really effed up my life, kid.
And your mother and father would be ashamed if they knew what you did to a sweet and sensitive old man like me.
- You dick.
- (SCOFFS) Okay.
You want to tell me what's going on with you? Not really.
But you're gonna make me, so I might as well, right? Mm-hmm.
Mathletes didn't get canceled.
I lied to you guys.
Why? (SIGHS) - There was this kid in math class - Mm-hmm.
He's been going kind of hard at me for the last week or so.
Anyways, he's been calling me Fuzz.
Fuzz? My-my lip.
There's hair.
- Don't you see that? - Oh, yeah.
He was just going hard at me yesterday, just as Rory Seltzer was sitting in the desk in front of me, and I just wanted to get all the attention off of me, you know? So I-I pulled Rory Seltzer's chair out from underneath him as he sat, and he went down.
Like, hard.
Dunne saw and she suspended me from Mathletes for a week, and I got detention.
There's a note, by the way.
You guys need to sign it.
You-you don't need to say anything; I feel awful.
I'm never gonna forgive myself.
And Rory Seltzer is gonna have a terrible life because of what I did.
I'm sure Rory Seltzer's gonna have a pretty terrible life anyway.
Don't be funny.
Please don't be funny.
Look, Randall, I I don't know how to discipline someone who's already harder on himself than I could ever be.
Okay? It's kind of confusing.
But I do know a thing or two about facial hair.
You want me to teach you how to shave? - Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
- Yeah? Okay.
- Got it? You ready? - Mm-hmm.
- I'm afraid I'm gonna cut myself.
- You won't.
- Okay.
- Go like this.
Hey, what are you guys doing? - Dad's teaching me to shave.
- I want to shave.
- Dude, you don't even have any facial hair.
- Yes, I do.
Hey Hold on.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Kev, put some warm water on your face first.
Go ahead.
Get some warm water on your face and then the shaving cream.
Okay? Just a little bit.
Spread it around.
No, go ahead.
Spread it around.
Yeah, spread it around.
There you go.
Go like this.
- Mm.
- (CHUCKLES) There you go.
See? Just like your brother.
- Mm-hmm.
- All right.
And then dry your hand off, okay? Randall, you're up.
Here you go.
Yeah, go ahead.
There you go.
Holy crap, dude! You're shaving.
Oh, my gosh, I know, I know.
Hey, guys, your sister wants Oh, my God.
What am I seeing right now? It was time, babe.
Oh, come on.
- Those cute little faces.
- Mom.
- Mom, please.
- All right, okay, I'm going, I'm going.
Hey, Kev, Kev, you're up.
Just nice and easy pressure.
Look in the mirror.
There you go.
Put a little more pressure on it.
Doing good.
Do one of these on your chin.
Go sideways to your chin.
KATE: Guys, come on, pin the tail on the donkey! Why does she want to do all this? I don't know, it's all baby stuff anyways.
I know, right, I mean (CHUCKLES) - we're shaving.
- (CHUCKLES) Hey, don't underestimate your sister, gentlemen.
She gets it.
At a very young age, she gets it.
What? Well, when you're young, you're always trying to be older.
Then, when you get old, you're always trying to go back, be back.
Try and appreciate the moments, you know? - Here, Kev, get a little on the side.
- KEVIN: Hmm? - Here? Here? - Yeah.
I mean, that's what we're doing, just collecting these little moments.
We don't recognize them when we're in 'em because well, we're too busy looking forward.
But then we spend the rest of our lives looking back.
Trying to, trying to remember them.
Trying to be back inside 'em.
Hmm, it's strange, the things you remember.
KEVIN: You're being really weird, Dad.
Mm-hmm, really weird.
One day you'll get it.
All right, looking good.
Hold on, hold on, let me have a look at you.
- Yep, still my sons.
- (BOTH LAUGH) Just checking in on you.
(SNIFFLES) Barely slept.
I was up all night writing a eulogy, and I can't remember a single thing that I said.
A depressing notion for a depressing day may I? It all just feels so pointless.
I spent my entire childhood worrying about losing her.
I spent the past decade abjectly terrified of it.
And now she's gone.
And yet the birds chirp on.
I notice that I'm hungry.
Five minutes ago, I thought about work.
Tomorrow I'll shower.
It just all feels so pointless.
That too depressing? Definitely less funny than your eulogy.
(LAUGHS) (SNIFFLES) We'll give you two a minute.
(SIGHS) It's not pointless, Dad.
Gonna be a grandfather.
Remember? A grandfather.
We're getting an early start.
You keep up with your chess while I'm gone, do you hear? - Okay.
- Okay, then.
Go back to sleep.
(EXHALES) Grandfather.
Strange word.
(EXHALES) Never thought of myself as either, really.
- Well, look at you now.
- Well look at me now.
Such a strange relationship: grandparent.
Not as complicated as parent, not as fraught.
But it's just unconditional.
Easy, pure love.
What an unusual thing.
To love someone so unconditionally when you know time probably won't allow you to be a big part of their story.
I don't remember my grandparents.
I can only access fleeting images.
The smell of pies.
She made pies, I think, my mother's mother.
My father's father smoked a pipe.
I remember the smell of that pipe.
Oh, I look at those two little girls.
I've known them all of seven months, and only now can I even comprehend how intensely my grandparents must have loved me.
And all I can remember are fleeting images.
Smells of pies and pipes.
I wonder what they'll remember about me.
A lot.
Yeah, a selfish thing to worry about, - I know - A lot.
Plus you got that really nice, really distinctive smell.
Well, thank God for that.
Like shaving cream and old sweaters.
(SIGHS) Memphis? - Memphis.
- All right.
Let's hit the road, Grandpa.
I've been checking my phone all day.
Hoping I'd receive an email, so I could tell you something that would maybe make you smile.
Just got the email.
Found out the sex of the baby.
It's a boy.
You're gonna have a grandson.
A boy? You're sure? Mm-hmm.
And, um if it's okay with you we'd like to name him William.
Your grandson is gonna be named after a man I never met.
But I know him.
'Cause I know you.
It's not pointless.
(SNIFFLES) A boy? - Boy.
- Aah! Finally! (BOTH LAUGH) About damn time, man.
We're having a boy! (LAUGHS) I'm having a boy, but It ain't nothing but women.
All my life, I got Black women here, Black women there.
Dej, I love you and you sisters and your mama, all the women in my life, but a little boy (LAUGHS) Little baby boy, do a little dance.
What are you doing? (BOTH LAUGH) Oh, are you planning on showing off for us? Yep.
(FOOTFALLS THUDDING) We have shaven.
Smooth as a baby's bottom.
KEVIN: Mm-hmm.
We're supposed to hang it.
You're supposed to close your eyes.
- KATE: Okay.
- RANDALL: Okay, okay, okay.
- Got the tape.
- (SIGHS) REBECCA: Feeling drowsy today.
- JACK: Yeah, it's a lazy day.
- REBECCA: Mm-hmm.
- They're shaving.
- I know.
Do you remember sitting here a few years ago, right on this couch? Mm-hmm.
You turned out to be a ten, Jack.
I mean, I would go higher, but I hate when people say "on a scale of one to ten," and then someone answers "12," you know? There are rules.
You're a 12.
Thank you.
I'm glad that you acknowledged that.
Of course I acknowledge.
JACK: Okay, guys, what do you say? (CLAPPING) - Let's get a blindfold on her.
- REBECCA: All right, Kate, let's - Let's do it! - Spin her around, see if she's still got it.
- KEVIN: No, no.
- RANDALL: I don't think she's gonna do it.
- KATE: I think I do.
- REBECCA: I think she does.
KEVIN: Have you been practicing in your room - or something? - REBECCA: Don't doubt your sister.
RANDALL: It's been a long time, okay? I agree with Kevin.
- Come on.
- REBECCA: I have faith in her.
Kate has always Whoa.
Hey, Bec, look at that.
- Holy cow.
- Is that thing for real? Hey, guys, look at that, look.
Babe, maybe there's a another family out there just like ours.
(SCOFFS) Yeah.
The Peasings.
And they live in - Minnesota.
- (LAUGHS) And they're very happy.
Yeah, they look very happy.
Jack, when the world puts something this obvious in front of you, you don't just walk away from it.
You could be missing out on something very important.
But I don't think we're gonna use it much.
- Do you want to use this? - RANDALL: Um, what am I doing? - All right, spin.
- What am I doing? JACK: Spin her, spin her, spin her.
REBECCA: Get her nice and dizzy and disoriented.
JACK: Oh, no, spin the other way, spin the other way! (ALL SHOUTING, CLAMORING) All right, give her the tail, give her the tail.
JACK: Can't believe you guys stopped her - REBECCA: Jack.
- JACK: What? No, I moved around the room.
RANDALL: Wrong way, wrong way, wrong way.
(ALL CLAMORING) Okay, don't give her any hints, Randall.
I'm not giving her hints.
There she goes.
(WHOOPING) Katie girl, no, are you peeking, what? - No! - How do you do that? Bug, come on, come on, tell us how you do that.
JACK: It's crazy.
Before you put the blindfold on, I look to see where you guys all are.
And you never shut up.
So as long as I know where you are, I always know where I'm going.
Baby girl.
- KATE: Hey.
- Hey.
(KEVIN EXHALES) KEVIN: You have a creepy glow about you.
(LAUGHS) I got some good news.
I got some very good news on a very sad day.
(SIGHS) We don't have parents anymore.
We still have parents.
You know what I mean, though.
What are we gonna do now? Like, with our lives? We're gonna do what she wanted us to do.
We're gonna live fearlessly.
I'm gonna open up so many music schools for the visually impaired that People are gonna start becoming resentful of blind musicians? - Exactly.
- Yes.
They're gonna say, "They have it too good.
" (ALL LAUGH) I'm gonna focus on the nonprofit.
Be home more.
I like my home.
Took me a long time to get it.
DNC wants me to go to the Iowa state fair.
Shake some hands, eat some junk food.
Deep-fried Oreos and whatnot.
And, uh if the folks who like to deep-fry their food like you then maybe You gonna go? - I'm weighing it with Beth.
- Mm-hmm.
But, uh, if she's down? For Mom? Yeah, for Mom I might go.
(KATE LAUGHS) Can I tell you guys my nightmare? We drift.
With Mom being gone and our busy lives, we drift.
And I'm not saying we wind up, you know, estranged or anything, but We're not gonna drift.
We could drift.
(CLEARS THROAT) If someone asks me to close my eyes and picture my family it's not Beth and the girls I see first.
My first picture is Mom and Dad and the two of you.
Younger, cuter versions of you two, but still - Same.
- Same.
Guys? First came? Me.
- And Dad said? - Gee.
- And then came? - Me.
- And Mom said? - We.
- (CHUCKLES) - And then came? Me.
And they said? That's three.
ALL: Big Three.
Big Three.
(SIGHS) Hey, Kate? If you drifted we'd drift right after you.
Can you really drift, though, Kev? 'Cause I can't remember if you ever actually learned how to swim.
(BOTH LAUGH) Yeah, well, I had to learn how to swim.
Growing up with you, all those tears, I would've drowned.
- Right in the kitchen.
- I'm sorry, I'm just in touch - with my emotions unlike some people, Robo-Kev.
- Yeah, I'm just saying, you know, people don't like their presidents all weepy and stuff, you know what I mean, you got to button that up.
She grabbed my hand.
Right at the very end.
You know, right before Yeah.
I know, I saw.
I wonder what that was.
I've missed that little scar.
Come on, you didn't even notice it for over a decade.
Was too busy looking at the rest of the face.
I'm scared.
I know.
But don't be.
KEVIN: Okay.
Let's be honest, now that I'm shaving, do I seem more like a man? - No.
- More like Dad? - You're getting there.
- I don't know, Kev.
I don't, I don't really see it yet.
You do know how much I love you, right, Bec? Babe? - JACK: Bec? - REBECCA: Who, me? Babe, do you, do you know how much I love you? You got, you got to appreciate the little things, Bec.
Babe, you have said that before.
He was, he was listening to what I said.
He says it all the time.
- Those are big things - No, the little things (ALL CLAMORING) - Hey, babe? - Yeah.
We did good.
You did so good.
There was so much left I wanted to do with them.
You will.
All right, go easy on me.
Oh, boy.
Oh boy.
(ALL CHATTING, CLAMORING) What? It's hard to explain, but you'll do all those things with them.
♪ REBECCA: Promise? I do.
I mean, it's not like I want to be there for anything weird.
I don't want to watch them shower or anything.
You won't.
But you'll be there.
♪ OTHERS: Oh! (ALL CLAMORING, LAUGHING) Oh! I can't dance.
Just focus on the kids.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No! No! No! No! No! No! (LAUGHING, CLAMORING) Quite a thing, isn't it? Us finding each other in that bar that night.
I don't know.
I mean, when the world puts something that obvious in front of you, you don't just walk away.
♪ (LAUGHING, CLAMORING) Get Randall! Get Randall! Get Randall! (RANDALL SHOUTING) JACK: You ready? I don't want to leave them.
You don't.
You'll see.
I love you.
I love you.

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