Top Gear (US) s03e08 Episode Script
America's Toughest Car
Now, on "Top Gear" We try to find the toughest car in America.
Oh, very funny! Yeah! And the winner takes on the U.
S.
army in one of the toughest suvs on the planet.
Go, go, go! Move, move.
These days, most new cars seem to give up when they hit 150,000 Miles.
But there are some that seem to live forever, no matter how hard we try to drive them into the ground.
But what's America's toughest, most indestructible car of all? We decided to find out, but there were a couple of rules.
Each car had to be at least 20 years old and cost no more than $2,000.
We met in San Bernardino, California.
Look at this beauty, huh? '90 Volvo 240 DL wagon.
I mean, this defines unkillable.
I mean, the a pillars on this thing, you could hit a moose and be fine in this car.
Is this the handle so you can pick this piece of crap up and drag it to the gas station? I don't really feel like you have room to talk here.
Are you kidding? 1992 Chevy Caprice.
This is the definition of unkillable.
This thing is two tons.
It's a killer whale.
You managed to pick another old person's car.
Yes! Old people drive this.
That's why it has to be indestructible.
They're blind, they're deaf, they could have a stroke while they're driving.
They'll be fine in this car.
You hear that? Look out.
Oh, really? That's right.
When did you become a science teacher? Oh, come on.
This is the epitome of toughness in a car.
When you think of raw toughness and unkillability, you think of this.
1987 Toyota Corolla.
And it's the Peter Falk edition.
I don't get that joke.
I'm sure it references a one-eyed person.
Here's the thing This car raced in the WRC, Paris Dakar race, probably one of the toughest races - on the planet.
- This is crap.
And let me guess That's you.
Two tons, baby.
Yeah.
From a poor little old lady.
No! She wasn't poor.
Now, if you're looking for a safe car, then you have to look for the Volvo.
I mean, the 240 in this country was the measure of standard for crash test for years.
Plus it's made from Swedish steel.
We all know that's the toughest.
- What? - Swedish steel? Yeah.
From the people that brought you Ikea? And they've got meatballs and a pretty good massage.
Ok.
Let's do this.
- Come on.
- What are you doin'? I'm getting in.
It's There's get in your cars! On our journey to crown America's most indestructible car, we'd have to tackle ever tougher challenges, culminating in an almost impossible off road race.
The winner would be the car that survived the longest.
The first challenge was a simple drag race, and Rut was already embracing his mommy mobile's safety features.
Volvo, one of the first companies that started using air bags in cars, they came up with the three point seat belt, tempered glass While Adam's unwavering confidence came to a screeching halt.
My only concern is the brakes.
I hope there's enough there to stop me.
And true to form, Mr.
Mom was already experiencing his first hot flash.
Whoo, let me turn up this air conditioning for a minute.
You have air conditioning, Rutledge, you? I'm cold, I could use a sweater.
All right, you guys ready? You ready, Captain Air Conditioning? Brr! It's cold over here, let's do this.
3, 2, 1.
Go! Oh.
Oh, I got a good one.
87 horsepower! In fury! Cutting off the Caprice.
That's what I'm talkin' about! Oh! That's it.
Now we're going to test the acceleration.
Get up and run, baby.
And those guys are gone.
That's it.
Transmission shifted nice.
Fourth gear is good.
Makes a little noise.
There he is, almost no power to this thing at all.
Ok, a little bit of play in the steering.
I got a good Toyota! That's all I know.
And now we pass race boy.
No! I don't know if I'm going to break the speed limit here.
- Ha ha ha! - No! Very good! Ok, now let's see if we have any brakes.
I have brakes! I can stop! Not quickly, but I'm stoppin'.
Rutledge, maybe you should have turned the air conditioning off, I don't know.
I did turn it off.
That was full throttle.
That was incredibly slow.
I think this thing is solid and reliable and unkillable.
And slow as crap.
My two ton battering ram had taken the first challenge, and we learned two things.
First of all, Tanner can lose a speed challenge, and secondly, daddy day care was going to have to leave very early to pick up the kids.
It was time to head to our next challenge 20 miles away at the San Bernardino sheriff's training facility.
Toyotas are some of the best lasting cars on the planet.
80% of Toyotas sold in the last 20 years are still on the road.
I know this thing is a lot stronger than that Corolla, 'cause I've owned one of those Corollas.
They're great cars, but they're just not that strong.
Now the Caprice, that's a pretty solid choice.
Except that Adam's driving it, which inherently means it will get wrecked before we get to the end.
I chose the Chevy Caprice because bigger is better.
Bigger is tougher.
There's no petite Navy seals.
I have no idea how we're going to test the unkillableness of these cars, but the Chevy's clearly going to be the winner.
Tanner, do you think if Adam drove that Corolla, he couldn't kill it? Uhh I am pleading the fifth on that.
I could kill the Corolla with this.
We arrived at the local sheriff's shooting range and testing facility.
Oh, this doesn't look good.
A bullet-strewn hell hole where bad cars go to die.
Ohh! Seriously?! At least we're stopped.
Ooh, sorry, man, I was coming in hot.
Probably all it had.
You're going to scratch my pristine old lady there.
What are we doing? Let's see.
"To be reliable, a vehicle must be durable, "an attribute often described as being bullet-proof.
"To see which of your vehicles is the most durable, "you will each fire three rounds at each others' cars with this mossberg bullpup 12 gauge shotgun.
" Oh, God.
Adam's marine mammal of a Chevy was up first.
We'd each try to inflict as much body damage as we could to make the drive as uncomfortable as possible while avoiding the gas tank and engine.
They'd be tested later.
All right.
Here we go.
Kill it, kill it! Ahh! Yes! Oww! Wait a minute! He hit the door.
Good-bye, quarter panel.
Ohh! Look at that! Ohh.
Nice spread.
Ohh! Nice work.
That was awesome! Put it up.
That was terrible.
Tanner was up next.
Ah, yeah! Come on.
Oh! Sweet jeebers! Ohh! Ohh! Look at that! All right, that's enough.
Your car got ruined! Feel better? They make cop cars out of that.
That's nothin'.
That's a drive through Newark.
You want to know what you didn't count on? I'm next.
Rutledge's car.
Let's just see how the Swedish steel is in the back door.
Oh, God.
Ohh! Oh, gosh, that scares me! Yes! I didn't shoot your window, man.
Air conditioning, gone.
The Swedish steel was about to be introduced to American lead.
Ohh.
Were you trying to shoot the door handle? Ohh! I bet that door still opens, you jerk.
Our cars may have taken a beating, but now it was time for Adam and I to get some revenge.
Look.
What? I think I left my sunglasses in there, so just try to, you know Where'd you leave 'em, on the driver's side? No! Ohh! Good lord.
Right there? That was good.
Oh! Oh! You didn't have anything in the trunk, did you? I'm good.
I can drive right out of here right now.
Oh, no.
There's more.
Yeah, we're not done.
The true test of a car's build quality is how it stands up to rough roads, freezing temperatures, and, of course, high explosive incendiary devices placed in the backseat.
The challenge would be to see if our cars still started after an explosion.
I've never blown a car up before.
Ah, there's nothing to it.
Is it leather? Yeah.
It's real leather.
Not anymore.
So it's probably got some sort of flammable conditioner on the leather? That sucks.
- Ooh.
- Yeah.
You'll be fine.
Push the button.
I think you're going to have wheels and a roof rack left.
Earmuffs on.
Ok.
Now what? All right, this is very precise.
Boom! Ahh! Not funny, man.
I've had a lot of coffee today.
All right, I'm sorry, that wasn't nice.
- Uncalled for.
- I'm sorry.
Ok, you guys.
Here we go.
Should we count it down? 3, 2, 1, go! Coming up, we take things to new heights.
Shamu! Oh-ho! Yes! And the winner of the toughest car challenge tries to evade the U.
S.
military.
"Top Gear" had sent us to California to find the toughest car in America.
I had beaten out Volvo man and Toyota boy in the drag race.
No! Now we were testing build quality.
3, 2, 1, go! That was huge! Thank you, fellas.
Appreciate it.
Wow.
Good luck driving that around.
Look at your headrest, it's melted.
Oh, my gosh.
That car is going to be nasty inside.
I wouldn't know the full extent of the damage until I tried to drive it, but I had faith.
If there was one car that could survive this, it was my Volvo.
Adam was up next.
- Here we go.
- Give me a count, Rut.
- 3 - You don't need to cover your - 2, 1, go! - Safety first.
Oh, that was awesome, I felt the heat! - It's burning.
- Fire in the Chevy! Ohh.
What's he sending, an emergency cow? That fire is getting out of control.
Oh, that velour is toast.
I can hear it sizzling.
I think we've proven something here.
I don't know if we need to continue.
I think we did prove it.
Your car actually went like this "No!" Whatever.
Give me the detonator.
Toyota's going to show you how it's done here.
What's it going to show? Yeah, it's going to show I love what you do for Pow! Ahh! Shhh.
Toyota This wasn't looking good.
My Toyota was built for speed, not war games.
3, 2, 1 Ohh! No! Oh, it blew the door open! Ah! - It's fine.
- That was great.
- It's fine.
- Burn, baby, burn! It's fine.
You know when people are talking about, oh, if we drag race, I'm going to blow your doors off.
That's what happened.
You did it standing still.
Door's still attached.
And I bet it still runs.
My doors didn't blow open.
Yeah, sure, I lost two windows that were already shot out.
Other than that, that Volvo is pristine.
Look how tough the Caprice is.
You can barely tell anything happened to it.
The headliner of the Caprice is all burned and dripping down the Volvo.
Look at the leather bubbling and boiling.
- You're going to sit in that? - Yeah.
And you know what, I think mine will start.
I know mine will start.
I got no doubt the Corolla's going to start.
Let's do it.
Oh, yeah, look at that.
See how I can just go right in the driver door.
- Like it was meant to be.
- Much better now.
That should be an option The bullet burned option.
Oh, this smells bad.
I can't see a thing.
Ok Ok, you've looked better, honey.
Ooh.
That's terrible.
Well, it's not so bad in here.
I mean, there's a little char, a little melt.
It smells like marshmallows, tandoori chicken and dead yak.
Then came the moment of truth.
Crossing fingers.
Ok, Volvo.
She runs! You can do it, baby, you can do it.
Yeah! It starts up better than it did before.
The a/c still works.
I'd call that unkillable.
Yes! Yes! And the window works! Ha ha ha! Somehow, our four-wheeled cockroaches didn't die.
So we scraped the soot off our windows and headed to our next challenge ten miles away.
I didn't know you guys were leaving, I couldn't see.
The biggest difference in the car now is, of course, the charred interior, and the strong hint of toxic fumes in the air.
Other than that, she is still just as solid and as Swedish as it was.
I'll say minus one slightly annoying rattle, which is fixed, this car's basically perfect.
I still have all my power, my brakes work, my steering is still terrible, the air conditioning's busted, and it smells like a dock fire in here.
But other than that, I am very impressed with shamu.
You can't kill this car.
This thing can handle anything thrown its way.
You want to drop it off a building? That's fine.
Try to sink it in a lake? Totally cool.
The next challenge would test our cars to see if they were tough enough to survive a major collision, which we would simulate by dropping them from a crane.
The least damaged would win.
I like the crane.
How high are we going to drop 'em? Well, if you were to drop a car from say 15 feet, that's the equivalent of running it into a wall at 25 miles an hour, roughly.
- How do you know that? - I read a lot.
Ok.
I mean, I'm not worried about it.
- You should be.
- You should go first.
I'll go first.
Yeah.
I mean, it'll bounce.
This thing only weighs 2,000 pounds.
How do you want to drop it? I'm going to not do the engine, not do the back - where the fuel tank is - Ok.
Not the driver door, it's got enough damage from your bullet holes.
I'm going to do it on the passenger side.
Go right ahead.
Doesn't that seem a little higher than we talked about? - No way this thing drives.
- Ok.
Zero chance.
I just can't wait to see how it's going to get better.
I know this is going to make the car better somehow.
I'm excited.
You know, I admire optimism, but I'm really enjoying stupidity.
And you're loaded with it.
Pull the string.
Ok, I'm pulling the string.
Ohh! We were competing to find the toughest car in America.
So far, Adam had won the drag race, and the build quality challenge had been a draw.
Now we'll be dropping our cars 15 feet from a crane, the equivalent of a 25 mile per hour collision, to test crash survivability.
Tanner's pocket rocket was up first.
Ok, I'm pulling the string.
Ohh! That was a little big That was a little bigger impact than I thought.
We're bleeding.
I felt an aftershock.
That was like getting t-boned by a house.
What did it fix, though? That's what See, I kind of expected this headlight to be fixed now, but nope.
I think we're good here.
Only half the windshield is broken.
I bet that door still works.
Yeah, if you don't want to get in or out of it.
Look, try dropping a car that weighs twice as much - and see what happens.
- I certainly will.
- Yeah.
- I'll go next.
How are you doing to do it? You going to drop it on the nose? - No.
- Come on.
No.
I'm going to do the same thing here.
Taking the easy way out, huh? You can't kill shamu.
I think shamu's dead.
Right? Shh.
He doesn't know yet.
Oh.
He doesn't know.
All right, gentlemen.
Now we're just going to see the big girl bounce.
I think, because it's heavier, there's going to be a bigger crushing effect on the car.
I think so, too.
I think the engine's going to come dismounted.
It's just going to take a little bit of cosmetic damage and be able to drive it away.
We ready? Dude, pull the string, please.
People are going to think there's an earthquake in California when this drops.
Do it.
3, 2, 1.
- Shamu! - Pull it.
Oh, yes! Yes! I hit the dismount! It's a perfect ten.
I think there are no longer any body panels that line up straight.
That looks like oil.
That looks like oil coming out of there.
Oh, that's not good.
Oh, it broke off motor mounts.
The mounts are gone.
Oh, man.
You know what? I'm going to show you guys what an unkillable car looks like, 'cause I'm going to drop the Volvo on the back.
- Man's going butt first.
- Swedish steel.
Oh, are you in trouble.
That's going to hit, and I think it's going to fall over on your roof.
I think it'll actually be better, because the roof is so strong.
'Cause as you guys know, this is Swedish steel, the finest steel in the world.
Have you ever heard of Swedish steel before he started I thought it was like a pose.
What's the pose? Let's see it Swedish steel.
Give it to me.
What, this? Yeah.
That.
All right.
You guys ready? - Pull the string.
- Swedish steel! Oh-ho-ho! Oh! Look at that! Look at that! It's perfect! This is the best car ever made! There's barely a scratch on it! How did it fall forward? That was incredible.
The monty-mobile proved to have an incredible firm rear end, and that made daddy very excited.
Ooh, look at that crumple zone.
If you got rear-ended and you were sitting in that backseat right now, you'd be fine.
Look at the thing.
All it is, a little bit of rear impact damage, and that's it.
But it is hemorrhaging.
It's leaking a little.
You're right, what was I thinking? Good news, kids daddy's rear end is only leaking a little.
If it was truly unkillable, that wouldn't matter.
You wouldn't even care if it had fluid in it, you'd just start it.
So we're all leaking, so let's just start 'em up now.
- Let's see who starts.
- I'm in.
Bet the air conditioning still works, too.
- Really? - Yeah.
I'm not worried about a thing.
Ok.
I didn't think it could get more gross in here.
Buzzer works.
This isn't good.
Big girl go boom.
You can do this.
Amazing! Let me check.
Oh, yep.
Air conditioning still works.
Oh, I've got to turn that off.
Yes! That's what I'm talking I mean, I'm not surprised.
Yes! Yes! Yes! All right, on to the next challenge.
Our final challenge was five Miles away at Glen Helen raceway.
But how bruised and battered was my Swedish sensation? Hmm.
Little bit of a rubbing sound.
But I can hear Adam's car, and it sounds much worse.
That's the drive shaft.
Good girl! That's it, easy.
Like a little galloping horse.
Come on, baby.
That's it.
The Chevy definitely sounded like it was dropped on its side.
But Tanner sounded like he was dropped on his head.
This Corolla's having a hard time going this slow.
I'm just sayin', Corolla wants to run.
Wants to be free, wants to spread its wings now that it's come out of the cocoon.
Yeah, I definitely lost power steering.
I'm assuming the belt just slipped off.
I'd look under the hood but why, you know? We finally managed to limp to Glen Helen raceway, a mecca for motorcross and off-road truck racing.
But not for beaten up 20 year old cars.
You fixed it! How did you do that? This is like the best day ever.
Our final challenge was an obstacle-filled dirt course with suspension-punishing whoops, berms and a water hazard.
The winner would be the car that completed the most laps.
And to add insult to injury, all the oil would be drained from our vehicles.
Wait, ok, you take the blood out of the animal and then run it around the racetrack.
That's the idea? Yeah.
Pretty much.
You know what this looks like? This looks like the Paris-dakar rally.
Which the Corolla has competed in.
Yeah, but it had oil in it.
And it wasn't dropped from a crane before the race.
These roads are just like the roads in Sweden.
So the Volvo, without oil, just going to sail through it.
The Caprice is going to drive over this and drive through all the crap that's spewing out of you guys.
Can we race, please? Let's drain 'em, and let's race.
My strategy was like the hair of a Swede golden.
This is a race of attrition.
So you know what, I'm going to help that attrition rate and I'm going to take Tanner out, 'cause it's the right thing to do.
And I believe that Adam's car will take itself out.
And if I know Adam, I'm sure he also had a brilliantly thought-through plan.
It's not a good plan I have, but when we say go, I'm just going to slam into Tanner.
I may not win, but I'll feel a lot better.
I think I'm ok.
I'm not trying to be cocky or anything.
Would never want anybody to get that impression.
But I am, uh, I'm just going to go for it.
Here we go, in 3, 2, 1, go! Oh, jeez! Little friendly lay around here! I'm a little stuck in the middle! Ooh.
Oh! Oh! Oh, no! Come on, shamu.
Not in the water! Not in the water! Look at that! Oh, he takes an early lead! Ohh! Shamu! I got nothin'.
Look at that, over the whoop, over the whoop.
Oh, my gosh! That is gigantic! I'm a beached whale! Adam is down, Adam is down.
Oh, look out for the logs.
This is going to make it go a little too fast.
Oh.
Oh, wow! We were in California, trying to find the toughest, most indestructible car in America.
Oh! So far, each of our cars had survived the punishing set of tests Ohh! But our last challenge was the toughest yet.
The oil had been drained from our engines and we were tackling a brutal off-road course.
Whoever's car did the most laps before dying would win.
Adam had already beached himself on the first lap I got nothin'.
And somehow, Rutledge was in the lead.
Oh, look out for the logs.
Just going to make it go a little too fast.
Oh oh, wow! Ow! Ouch.
Oh, I feel like I got a flat tire, or two.
Oh, there was his tire, it popped.
Closer to pass.
Oh! Oh, Tanner is cheating! He is going around the whoops! That is crap! You're not even on the course! I need to catch up to Tanner.
And I need to pass him.
Oh, he's going to drill Adam! Ohh! Ahh.
Ow.
That hurt.
Adam's throwing things.
Ha! It's the Volvo, still alive! This is amazing! Oh, now Adam's just throwing stuff out there.
Whoo! This seems a little bit sketchy.
Corolla! Is it unkillable? It doesn't have any water, doesn't have any oil.
Oh, good God! Whoa-oh! Oh, no! Oh, come on! Come on.
Oh! That's No! No! Thank you, that's helping.
That's helping a lot.
I'm just going to keep going, ok? We'll see you later.
I had him! That was it, I had him.
Yeah! Drift machine! Whoo-hoo! Yeah! Oh, that was funny! Very funny! Tanner continued to celebrate in his usual understated way.
Oh! Good God.
Glass shards.
Until finally, the flaunting turned fatal.
Oh! Oh.
Oh, no.
Oh-ho! That's all she wrote.
Only like 18 laps without oil.
Unbelievable.
Corolla! What happened to your car? Shamu is beached.
Nice helmet through the windshield.
That's just sending you a message.
If I was really pissed, it would have been on the driver's side.
I don't know why you had to kill my car.
You were a freight train going through the whoops.
Oh, my gosh.
It was amazing, wasn't it? So what did we learn here today? You know what I think we learned, Rut? I think we learned, we really need to find out - how deep that water is.
- Ohh! - Oh, that's a - You are so strong.
He's angry! He's an angry little elf.
He's an angry little elf.
My 1987 Toyota Corolla was America's toughest, most indestructible car.
But there's tough, and there's military tough.
So I was headed cross country to Fort Campbell, Kentucky, home to the 101st Airborne Division a few other bad ass units that officially don't exist.
I was here to drive an SUV that has pure military pedigree.
The Germans call it the wolf.
It's served in over 60 different militaries, and it's the vehicle of choice for the Russian mafia.
This is the Mercedes Benz G63 AMG.
No matter what you think about the G63, there's one thing you can't argue with, and that's its military pedigree.
Paradoxically, though, these aren't driven by hardcore military tough types.
They're the starlets of Hollywood that you see behind the wheel of a G63.
I mean, it could be called the strangest truck on the planet.
On one hand, it's got body on frame construction, two live axles, three locking differentials, recirculating ball steering, which is rugged but old school technology.
Then amg got a hold of it, put in 536 horsepower.
Now it goes zero to sixty in 5.
3 seconds.
So it's basically the fastest farm tractor on the planet.
The 5.
5 liter bi-turbo v8 drags this 2 1/2 ton box to unlimited top speed of 130 miles an hour.
And it shifts so fast.
It's 6,000 rpm.
Just rattling through the gears.
There's 80 miles an hour.
That was quick.
Zero to sixty was 5.
3.
Now we're at a hundred 110, finding seventh gear, there it is.
120 Holy crap, here comes the end of the runway, 125.
Ok, we're braking.
That's the most dangerous part, is actually the slowing down.
It sort of weeble-wobbles its way down to the stop.
The G63 is most definitely quick, but has all the leather and chrome transformed this deadly German Shepherd into an over-pampered poodle? This is a truck, and have no doubts, it is a truck, that has changed very little fundamentally since 1972.
But, the thing that gets me is why you would take one of the best off-road machines in the world, put 500 horsepower in it and make it a grocery getter for housewives of Beverly hills, where it will never see dirt, or dust.
Strange.
So with all these luxury and performance distractions, paparazzi that are more likely to shoot you than an opposing army, has it completely forgotten its roots as a genuine military truck? To find out, I was going to put it to the ultimate test of military toughness.
Right now, I'm on the northern border of fort Campbell, somewhere around here in a small town called Cassidy mout.
It's m-o-u-t, or "miltary operations in urban terrain".
Now, my objective is to get down here to a safe house on the Southern end.
It's about ten miles as the crow flies.
Normally that wouldn't be a problem.
But today isn't normal.
I'm going to be hunted by deadly screaming eagles.
The 101st airborne is one of the most decorated units in American military history.
These air assault specialists have played a pivotal role in every major conflict from world war 2 to Afghanistan.
Good afternoon, gentlemen.
Chief Etchler, strike two.
This will be an unclassified briefing.
Today we have identified objective delta fox.
The guys after me today are a part of the second brigade combat team called strike.
He was raised in Europe where he received training in advanced driving techniques.
His most likely course of action is going to be to flee the area.
It is of utmost important that you guys are able to acquire this individual without harm.
I've got no idea what they're going to send after me.
They could just launch a missile, blow me to bits and be done with it.
But they're under orders to take me alive.
Say it again, this is not a kill mission, this is a capture.
And, they describe themselves as discriminately lethal, agile and adaptive.
Let's hope so.
Gentlemen, are there any questions at this time? Very well.
Go get 'em.
The mission would start at 0800 hours.
As the crow flies, it was just ten miles from start to finish.
But Fort Campbell has over a hundred thousand acres covered with hundreds of miles of roads and trails.
The 101st had no idea which one I'd take.
Because they had to take me alive, they had to use all their training and equipment to lure me into an ambush.
All I had to do was stay out of their trap.
Let's go, let's go! Open it up, come on! This was it.
The G-wagon and I against the might of the U.
S.
army.
Whoa! This thing is a beast.
As I made a run for it The eagles launched something I wasn't expecting A shadow drone, capable of spotting a pimple from 18,000 feet.
All right, camera down now.
I got to go all the way out there.
My God, this thing is so fast on the gravel! Ok, that's 90.
Whoa! That is fast through that little town.
With two miles down and eight to go, I got the feeling I was being watched.
They're on to us.
Shadow two one, strike team.
Strike team, go ahead.
Target vehicle's moving at an extremely high rate of speed from west to east through range 63.
Drones are absolutely relentless.
Some guy in a basement somewhere with a joystick.
That was nuts! Two one, maintain contact, continue to report location.
Now that the drone had located me, it was just a matter of time before the next wave of attack.
The 101st were launching two $11 million Kiowa Warrior helicopters.
These front line armed reconnaissance choppers would take over from the drone as the eyes and ears of the strike team, firing intel for ground forces and air assault teams to coordinate the attack and force me to retract.
If I couldn't shake them, it would be game over.
Top Gear had challenged us to find the toughest, most unkillable car in America, - and after being shot - Oh! - Bombed, dropped - Oh-ho-ho! And raced without oil, my Toyota Corolla had won.
My prize was being sent to Kentucky to try to escape the 101st Airborne Division in one of the toughest suvs ever made.
This thing is a beast.
The Mercedes G63 AMG.
Leather and bling aside, this is one of the most capable off-roading combinations.
If they can catch me in this on these roads, I don't think anybody's really got a chance.
Ok, here's the road.
Finally get to pavement.
I can let this thing open up.
Go, go, go, go, go, go! I'd made it off the gravel onto Palmyra Road, the main supply route that would take me directly to the finish line just seven miles South.
Shadow two one, straight main, out copy.
Straight main, go ahead.
Mercedes traveling South, Route Palmyra.
Holy! Kiowa helicopters.
It's gettin' real now.
These reconnaissance choppers will be firing intel to ground and air teams to coordinate the attack, forcing me into their trap.
Outrunning them on pavement's my only chance.
They go 130 miles an hour, and so do I.
110! They are right on top of me, unbelievable.
Whoa! 130! The G-wagon's speed wasn't enough.
I needed to break free and head for cover.
Here's a road.
Here we go.
Whoa! This thing's a bit of a handful.
Ok, I need to get into thicker cover than this.
They can definitely still see me here.
Oh, I got to get deep in the woods here.
Here we go, this is it.
This is how you hide a white G-wagon in the woods.
My plan seemed to have worked.
Up above, the Kiowas had switched to a search pattern.
I had lost them.
But for how long? The proximity sensors that are valuable in the mall parking lot are exceptionally annoying when you're actually Using the vehicle off-road.
I don't know why I'm whispering.
But I couldn't hide all day.
God, it covers ground so good! The G-wagon is eating the jungle alive.
The military-ness of this truck is awesome.
You can see why the Germans just didn't even try to reinvent it.
Oh, my gosh, does it get the job done.
Ok, we're back on the road, back on the road.
Finally, I was back on the tarmac with no sign of the Kiowas.
Half a mile ahead, I needed to make a right turn.
Then it was just four Miles to the finish.
Things were looking up.
All right, it seems pretty clear out here.
I think my hiding in the woods actually worked.
Holy they're right back on me! If they tracked me through that, I am in trouble.
The Kiowas now started to direct the ground forces to intercept me, including state of the art M.
A.
T.
V.
armored trucks.
All right, this obviously is not working.
Safe house is Over there.
All right, I got a right turn up here.
Whoa! Big military trucks.
I'm out of here, out of here, out of here.
That's bad.
That's where I need to go.
If I thought that was bad, things were about to get a whole lot worse.
28 infantry troops and two black hawks were about to take to the sky.
This is blackhawk 3-0-0, flight 1-2, 6-0-3.
We're clear for take-off, four left base, rowling 2-3.
Mission commanders had chosen an ambush point based on the intel from the kiowas.
The question was, could the ground forces and kiowas force me into it, or could I find a way out.
This is getting Very dangerous.
With the infantry closing in and more than three miles to the finish, the 101st were tightening their net.
Holy crap! I'm boxed in.
This is the only place I can go.
He's on me! This is not going to end well.
As I searched for a new way out, the blackhawks were delivering the infantry to the ambush sight.
Go, go, go, go! Go, go.
Holy crap! How many helicopters are there? The road is being completely cut off.
Ok.
They're leaving me absolutely no choice.
I'm being toyed with right now by the 101st airborne division.
This is a bad place to be, I can tell you.
This is not good.
I got helicopters chasing me, I got 22,000 pound tanks with turrets chasing me.
Up ahead was an intersection.
Both ways led to the finish line, but one was a trap.
Now it was my turn to roll the dice.
Did I go left or right? There are not too many people that have been chased by these men and women of the 101st and gotten away.
I had just a mile to get he tree line in safety.
If I guessed correctly, I'd make it.
If not, I was heading into a world of pain.
My only hope is just to go ludicrous speed.
Move, move.
I had just 300 yards to go.
With no infantry in sight, suddenly, things were looking very good.
But then, I saw something I wasn't expecting.
Stop sign? There wasn't a stop right Spike strips! Spike strips! Stop the vehicle! Reverse, reverse, reverse, reverse.
Go get him, get him, get him, get him! Hands up! Hands up, get your hands up! Move, move, move! Get down on the ground, on the ground! Oh The eagles had forced me into their trap.
It was game over.
I'll help you up.
The might of the 101st had been too much to conquer, but despite losing, the G-wagon had surprised me.
Even though these days it may be more bling than bang, it still has the heart of a military monster.
Oh, very funny! Yeah! And the winner takes on the U.
S.
army in one of the toughest suvs on the planet.
Go, go, go! Move, move.
These days, most new cars seem to give up when they hit 150,000 Miles.
But there are some that seem to live forever, no matter how hard we try to drive them into the ground.
But what's America's toughest, most indestructible car of all? We decided to find out, but there were a couple of rules.
Each car had to be at least 20 years old and cost no more than $2,000.
We met in San Bernardino, California.
Look at this beauty, huh? '90 Volvo 240 DL wagon.
I mean, this defines unkillable.
I mean, the a pillars on this thing, you could hit a moose and be fine in this car.
Is this the handle so you can pick this piece of crap up and drag it to the gas station? I don't really feel like you have room to talk here.
Are you kidding? 1992 Chevy Caprice.
This is the definition of unkillable.
This thing is two tons.
It's a killer whale.
You managed to pick another old person's car.
Yes! Old people drive this.
That's why it has to be indestructible.
They're blind, they're deaf, they could have a stroke while they're driving.
They'll be fine in this car.
You hear that? Look out.
Oh, really? That's right.
When did you become a science teacher? Oh, come on.
This is the epitome of toughness in a car.
When you think of raw toughness and unkillability, you think of this.
1987 Toyota Corolla.
And it's the Peter Falk edition.
I don't get that joke.
I'm sure it references a one-eyed person.
Here's the thing This car raced in the WRC, Paris Dakar race, probably one of the toughest races - on the planet.
- This is crap.
And let me guess That's you.
Two tons, baby.
Yeah.
From a poor little old lady.
No! She wasn't poor.
Now, if you're looking for a safe car, then you have to look for the Volvo.
I mean, the 240 in this country was the measure of standard for crash test for years.
Plus it's made from Swedish steel.
We all know that's the toughest.
- What? - Swedish steel? Yeah.
From the people that brought you Ikea? And they've got meatballs and a pretty good massage.
Ok.
Let's do this.
- Come on.
- What are you doin'? I'm getting in.
It's There's get in your cars! On our journey to crown America's most indestructible car, we'd have to tackle ever tougher challenges, culminating in an almost impossible off road race.
The winner would be the car that survived the longest.
The first challenge was a simple drag race, and Rut was already embracing his mommy mobile's safety features.
Volvo, one of the first companies that started using air bags in cars, they came up with the three point seat belt, tempered glass While Adam's unwavering confidence came to a screeching halt.
My only concern is the brakes.
I hope there's enough there to stop me.
And true to form, Mr.
Mom was already experiencing his first hot flash.
Whoo, let me turn up this air conditioning for a minute.
You have air conditioning, Rutledge, you? I'm cold, I could use a sweater.
All right, you guys ready? You ready, Captain Air Conditioning? Brr! It's cold over here, let's do this.
3, 2, 1.
Go! Oh.
Oh, I got a good one.
87 horsepower! In fury! Cutting off the Caprice.
That's what I'm talkin' about! Oh! That's it.
Now we're going to test the acceleration.
Get up and run, baby.
And those guys are gone.
That's it.
Transmission shifted nice.
Fourth gear is good.
Makes a little noise.
There he is, almost no power to this thing at all.
Ok, a little bit of play in the steering.
I got a good Toyota! That's all I know.
And now we pass race boy.
No! I don't know if I'm going to break the speed limit here.
- Ha ha ha! - No! Very good! Ok, now let's see if we have any brakes.
I have brakes! I can stop! Not quickly, but I'm stoppin'.
Rutledge, maybe you should have turned the air conditioning off, I don't know.
I did turn it off.
That was full throttle.
That was incredibly slow.
I think this thing is solid and reliable and unkillable.
And slow as crap.
My two ton battering ram had taken the first challenge, and we learned two things.
First of all, Tanner can lose a speed challenge, and secondly, daddy day care was going to have to leave very early to pick up the kids.
It was time to head to our next challenge 20 miles away at the San Bernardino sheriff's training facility.
Toyotas are some of the best lasting cars on the planet.
80% of Toyotas sold in the last 20 years are still on the road.
I know this thing is a lot stronger than that Corolla, 'cause I've owned one of those Corollas.
They're great cars, but they're just not that strong.
Now the Caprice, that's a pretty solid choice.
Except that Adam's driving it, which inherently means it will get wrecked before we get to the end.
I chose the Chevy Caprice because bigger is better.
Bigger is tougher.
There's no petite Navy seals.
I have no idea how we're going to test the unkillableness of these cars, but the Chevy's clearly going to be the winner.
Tanner, do you think if Adam drove that Corolla, he couldn't kill it? Uhh I am pleading the fifth on that.
I could kill the Corolla with this.
We arrived at the local sheriff's shooting range and testing facility.
Oh, this doesn't look good.
A bullet-strewn hell hole where bad cars go to die.
Ohh! Seriously?! At least we're stopped.
Ooh, sorry, man, I was coming in hot.
Probably all it had.
You're going to scratch my pristine old lady there.
What are we doing? Let's see.
"To be reliable, a vehicle must be durable, "an attribute often described as being bullet-proof.
"To see which of your vehicles is the most durable, "you will each fire three rounds at each others' cars with this mossberg bullpup 12 gauge shotgun.
" Oh, God.
Adam's marine mammal of a Chevy was up first.
We'd each try to inflict as much body damage as we could to make the drive as uncomfortable as possible while avoiding the gas tank and engine.
They'd be tested later.
All right.
Here we go.
Kill it, kill it! Ahh! Yes! Oww! Wait a minute! He hit the door.
Good-bye, quarter panel.
Ohh! Look at that! Ohh.
Nice spread.
Ohh! Nice work.
That was awesome! Put it up.
That was terrible.
Tanner was up next.
Ah, yeah! Come on.
Oh! Sweet jeebers! Ohh! Ohh! Look at that! All right, that's enough.
Your car got ruined! Feel better? They make cop cars out of that.
That's nothin'.
That's a drive through Newark.
You want to know what you didn't count on? I'm next.
Rutledge's car.
Let's just see how the Swedish steel is in the back door.
Oh, God.
Ohh! Oh, gosh, that scares me! Yes! I didn't shoot your window, man.
Air conditioning, gone.
The Swedish steel was about to be introduced to American lead.
Ohh.
Were you trying to shoot the door handle? Ohh! I bet that door still opens, you jerk.
Our cars may have taken a beating, but now it was time for Adam and I to get some revenge.
Look.
What? I think I left my sunglasses in there, so just try to, you know Where'd you leave 'em, on the driver's side? No! Ohh! Good lord.
Right there? That was good.
Oh! Oh! You didn't have anything in the trunk, did you? I'm good.
I can drive right out of here right now.
Oh, no.
There's more.
Yeah, we're not done.
The true test of a car's build quality is how it stands up to rough roads, freezing temperatures, and, of course, high explosive incendiary devices placed in the backseat.
The challenge would be to see if our cars still started after an explosion.
I've never blown a car up before.
Ah, there's nothing to it.
Is it leather? Yeah.
It's real leather.
Not anymore.
So it's probably got some sort of flammable conditioner on the leather? That sucks.
- Ooh.
- Yeah.
You'll be fine.
Push the button.
I think you're going to have wheels and a roof rack left.
Earmuffs on.
Ok.
Now what? All right, this is very precise.
Boom! Ahh! Not funny, man.
I've had a lot of coffee today.
All right, I'm sorry, that wasn't nice.
- Uncalled for.
- I'm sorry.
Ok, you guys.
Here we go.
Should we count it down? 3, 2, 1, go! Coming up, we take things to new heights.
Shamu! Oh-ho! Yes! And the winner of the toughest car challenge tries to evade the U.
S.
military.
"Top Gear" had sent us to California to find the toughest car in America.
I had beaten out Volvo man and Toyota boy in the drag race.
No! Now we were testing build quality.
3, 2, 1, go! That was huge! Thank you, fellas.
Appreciate it.
Wow.
Good luck driving that around.
Look at your headrest, it's melted.
Oh, my gosh.
That car is going to be nasty inside.
I wouldn't know the full extent of the damage until I tried to drive it, but I had faith.
If there was one car that could survive this, it was my Volvo.
Adam was up next.
- Here we go.
- Give me a count, Rut.
- 3 - You don't need to cover your - 2, 1, go! - Safety first.
Oh, that was awesome, I felt the heat! - It's burning.
- Fire in the Chevy! Ohh.
What's he sending, an emergency cow? That fire is getting out of control.
Oh, that velour is toast.
I can hear it sizzling.
I think we've proven something here.
I don't know if we need to continue.
I think we did prove it.
Your car actually went like this "No!" Whatever.
Give me the detonator.
Toyota's going to show you how it's done here.
What's it going to show? Yeah, it's going to show I love what you do for Pow! Ahh! Shhh.
Toyota This wasn't looking good.
My Toyota was built for speed, not war games.
3, 2, 1 Ohh! No! Oh, it blew the door open! Ah! - It's fine.
- That was great.
- It's fine.
- Burn, baby, burn! It's fine.
You know when people are talking about, oh, if we drag race, I'm going to blow your doors off.
That's what happened.
You did it standing still.
Door's still attached.
And I bet it still runs.
My doors didn't blow open.
Yeah, sure, I lost two windows that were already shot out.
Other than that, that Volvo is pristine.
Look how tough the Caprice is.
You can barely tell anything happened to it.
The headliner of the Caprice is all burned and dripping down the Volvo.
Look at the leather bubbling and boiling.
- You're going to sit in that? - Yeah.
And you know what, I think mine will start.
I know mine will start.
I got no doubt the Corolla's going to start.
Let's do it.
Oh, yeah, look at that.
See how I can just go right in the driver door.
- Like it was meant to be.
- Much better now.
That should be an option The bullet burned option.
Oh, this smells bad.
I can't see a thing.
Ok Ok, you've looked better, honey.
Ooh.
That's terrible.
Well, it's not so bad in here.
I mean, there's a little char, a little melt.
It smells like marshmallows, tandoori chicken and dead yak.
Then came the moment of truth.
Crossing fingers.
Ok, Volvo.
She runs! You can do it, baby, you can do it.
Yeah! It starts up better than it did before.
The a/c still works.
I'd call that unkillable.
Yes! Yes! And the window works! Ha ha ha! Somehow, our four-wheeled cockroaches didn't die.
So we scraped the soot off our windows and headed to our next challenge ten miles away.
I didn't know you guys were leaving, I couldn't see.
The biggest difference in the car now is, of course, the charred interior, and the strong hint of toxic fumes in the air.
Other than that, she is still just as solid and as Swedish as it was.
I'll say minus one slightly annoying rattle, which is fixed, this car's basically perfect.
I still have all my power, my brakes work, my steering is still terrible, the air conditioning's busted, and it smells like a dock fire in here.
But other than that, I am very impressed with shamu.
You can't kill this car.
This thing can handle anything thrown its way.
You want to drop it off a building? That's fine.
Try to sink it in a lake? Totally cool.
The next challenge would test our cars to see if they were tough enough to survive a major collision, which we would simulate by dropping them from a crane.
The least damaged would win.
I like the crane.
How high are we going to drop 'em? Well, if you were to drop a car from say 15 feet, that's the equivalent of running it into a wall at 25 miles an hour, roughly.
- How do you know that? - I read a lot.
Ok.
I mean, I'm not worried about it.
- You should be.
- You should go first.
I'll go first.
Yeah.
I mean, it'll bounce.
This thing only weighs 2,000 pounds.
How do you want to drop it? I'm going to not do the engine, not do the back - where the fuel tank is - Ok.
Not the driver door, it's got enough damage from your bullet holes.
I'm going to do it on the passenger side.
Go right ahead.
Doesn't that seem a little higher than we talked about? - No way this thing drives.
- Ok.
Zero chance.
I just can't wait to see how it's going to get better.
I know this is going to make the car better somehow.
I'm excited.
You know, I admire optimism, but I'm really enjoying stupidity.
And you're loaded with it.
Pull the string.
Ok, I'm pulling the string.
Ohh! We were competing to find the toughest car in America.
So far, Adam had won the drag race, and the build quality challenge had been a draw.
Now we'll be dropping our cars 15 feet from a crane, the equivalent of a 25 mile per hour collision, to test crash survivability.
Tanner's pocket rocket was up first.
Ok, I'm pulling the string.
Ohh! That was a little big That was a little bigger impact than I thought.
We're bleeding.
I felt an aftershock.
That was like getting t-boned by a house.
What did it fix, though? That's what See, I kind of expected this headlight to be fixed now, but nope.
I think we're good here.
Only half the windshield is broken.
I bet that door still works.
Yeah, if you don't want to get in or out of it.
Look, try dropping a car that weighs twice as much - and see what happens.
- I certainly will.
- Yeah.
- I'll go next.
How are you doing to do it? You going to drop it on the nose? - No.
- Come on.
No.
I'm going to do the same thing here.
Taking the easy way out, huh? You can't kill shamu.
I think shamu's dead.
Right? Shh.
He doesn't know yet.
Oh.
He doesn't know.
All right, gentlemen.
Now we're just going to see the big girl bounce.
I think, because it's heavier, there's going to be a bigger crushing effect on the car.
I think so, too.
I think the engine's going to come dismounted.
It's just going to take a little bit of cosmetic damage and be able to drive it away.
We ready? Dude, pull the string, please.
People are going to think there's an earthquake in California when this drops.
Do it.
3, 2, 1.
- Shamu! - Pull it.
Oh, yes! Yes! I hit the dismount! It's a perfect ten.
I think there are no longer any body panels that line up straight.
That looks like oil.
That looks like oil coming out of there.
Oh, that's not good.
Oh, it broke off motor mounts.
The mounts are gone.
Oh, man.
You know what? I'm going to show you guys what an unkillable car looks like, 'cause I'm going to drop the Volvo on the back.
- Man's going butt first.
- Swedish steel.
Oh, are you in trouble.
That's going to hit, and I think it's going to fall over on your roof.
I think it'll actually be better, because the roof is so strong.
'Cause as you guys know, this is Swedish steel, the finest steel in the world.
Have you ever heard of Swedish steel before he started I thought it was like a pose.
What's the pose? Let's see it Swedish steel.
Give it to me.
What, this? Yeah.
That.
All right.
You guys ready? - Pull the string.
- Swedish steel! Oh-ho-ho! Oh! Look at that! Look at that! It's perfect! This is the best car ever made! There's barely a scratch on it! How did it fall forward? That was incredible.
The monty-mobile proved to have an incredible firm rear end, and that made daddy very excited.
Ooh, look at that crumple zone.
If you got rear-ended and you were sitting in that backseat right now, you'd be fine.
Look at the thing.
All it is, a little bit of rear impact damage, and that's it.
But it is hemorrhaging.
It's leaking a little.
You're right, what was I thinking? Good news, kids daddy's rear end is only leaking a little.
If it was truly unkillable, that wouldn't matter.
You wouldn't even care if it had fluid in it, you'd just start it.
So we're all leaking, so let's just start 'em up now.
- Let's see who starts.
- I'm in.
Bet the air conditioning still works, too.
- Really? - Yeah.
I'm not worried about a thing.
Ok.
I didn't think it could get more gross in here.
Buzzer works.
This isn't good.
Big girl go boom.
You can do this.
Amazing! Let me check.
Oh, yep.
Air conditioning still works.
Oh, I've got to turn that off.
Yes! That's what I'm talking I mean, I'm not surprised.
Yes! Yes! Yes! All right, on to the next challenge.
Our final challenge was five Miles away at Glen Helen raceway.
But how bruised and battered was my Swedish sensation? Hmm.
Little bit of a rubbing sound.
But I can hear Adam's car, and it sounds much worse.
That's the drive shaft.
Good girl! That's it, easy.
Like a little galloping horse.
Come on, baby.
That's it.
The Chevy definitely sounded like it was dropped on its side.
But Tanner sounded like he was dropped on his head.
This Corolla's having a hard time going this slow.
I'm just sayin', Corolla wants to run.
Wants to be free, wants to spread its wings now that it's come out of the cocoon.
Yeah, I definitely lost power steering.
I'm assuming the belt just slipped off.
I'd look under the hood but why, you know? We finally managed to limp to Glen Helen raceway, a mecca for motorcross and off-road truck racing.
But not for beaten up 20 year old cars.
You fixed it! How did you do that? This is like the best day ever.
Our final challenge was an obstacle-filled dirt course with suspension-punishing whoops, berms and a water hazard.
The winner would be the car that completed the most laps.
And to add insult to injury, all the oil would be drained from our vehicles.
Wait, ok, you take the blood out of the animal and then run it around the racetrack.
That's the idea? Yeah.
Pretty much.
You know what this looks like? This looks like the Paris-dakar rally.
Which the Corolla has competed in.
Yeah, but it had oil in it.
And it wasn't dropped from a crane before the race.
These roads are just like the roads in Sweden.
So the Volvo, without oil, just going to sail through it.
The Caprice is going to drive over this and drive through all the crap that's spewing out of you guys.
Can we race, please? Let's drain 'em, and let's race.
My strategy was like the hair of a Swede golden.
This is a race of attrition.
So you know what, I'm going to help that attrition rate and I'm going to take Tanner out, 'cause it's the right thing to do.
And I believe that Adam's car will take itself out.
And if I know Adam, I'm sure he also had a brilliantly thought-through plan.
It's not a good plan I have, but when we say go, I'm just going to slam into Tanner.
I may not win, but I'll feel a lot better.
I think I'm ok.
I'm not trying to be cocky or anything.
Would never want anybody to get that impression.
But I am, uh, I'm just going to go for it.
Here we go, in 3, 2, 1, go! Oh, jeez! Little friendly lay around here! I'm a little stuck in the middle! Ooh.
Oh! Oh! Oh, no! Come on, shamu.
Not in the water! Not in the water! Look at that! Oh, he takes an early lead! Ohh! Shamu! I got nothin'.
Look at that, over the whoop, over the whoop.
Oh, my gosh! That is gigantic! I'm a beached whale! Adam is down, Adam is down.
Oh, look out for the logs.
This is going to make it go a little too fast.
Oh.
Oh, wow! We were in California, trying to find the toughest, most indestructible car in America.
Oh! So far, each of our cars had survived the punishing set of tests Ohh! But our last challenge was the toughest yet.
The oil had been drained from our engines and we were tackling a brutal off-road course.
Whoever's car did the most laps before dying would win.
Adam had already beached himself on the first lap I got nothin'.
And somehow, Rutledge was in the lead.
Oh, look out for the logs.
Just going to make it go a little too fast.
Oh oh, wow! Ow! Ouch.
Oh, I feel like I got a flat tire, or two.
Oh, there was his tire, it popped.
Closer to pass.
Oh! Oh, Tanner is cheating! He is going around the whoops! That is crap! You're not even on the course! I need to catch up to Tanner.
And I need to pass him.
Oh, he's going to drill Adam! Ohh! Ahh.
Ow.
That hurt.
Adam's throwing things.
Ha! It's the Volvo, still alive! This is amazing! Oh, now Adam's just throwing stuff out there.
Whoo! This seems a little bit sketchy.
Corolla! Is it unkillable? It doesn't have any water, doesn't have any oil.
Oh, good God! Whoa-oh! Oh, no! Oh, come on! Come on.
Oh! That's No! No! Thank you, that's helping.
That's helping a lot.
I'm just going to keep going, ok? We'll see you later.
I had him! That was it, I had him.
Yeah! Drift machine! Whoo-hoo! Yeah! Oh, that was funny! Very funny! Tanner continued to celebrate in his usual understated way.
Oh! Good God.
Glass shards.
Until finally, the flaunting turned fatal.
Oh! Oh.
Oh, no.
Oh-ho! That's all she wrote.
Only like 18 laps without oil.
Unbelievable.
Corolla! What happened to your car? Shamu is beached.
Nice helmet through the windshield.
That's just sending you a message.
If I was really pissed, it would have been on the driver's side.
I don't know why you had to kill my car.
You were a freight train going through the whoops.
Oh, my gosh.
It was amazing, wasn't it? So what did we learn here today? You know what I think we learned, Rut? I think we learned, we really need to find out - how deep that water is.
- Ohh! - Oh, that's a - You are so strong.
He's angry! He's an angry little elf.
He's an angry little elf.
My 1987 Toyota Corolla was America's toughest, most indestructible car.
But there's tough, and there's military tough.
So I was headed cross country to Fort Campbell, Kentucky, home to the 101st Airborne Division a few other bad ass units that officially don't exist.
I was here to drive an SUV that has pure military pedigree.
The Germans call it the wolf.
It's served in over 60 different militaries, and it's the vehicle of choice for the Russian mafia.
This is the Mercedes Benz G63 AMG.
No matter what you think about the G63, there's one thing you can't argue with, and that's its military pedigree.
Paradoxically, though, these aren't driven by hardcore military tough types.
They're the starlets of Hollywood that you see behind the wheel of a G63.
I mean, it could be called the strangest truck on the planet.
On one hand, it's got body on frame construction, two live axles, three locking differentials, recirculating ball steering, which is rugged but old school technology.
Then amg got a hold of it, put in 536 horsepower.
Now it goes zero to sixty in 5.
3 seconds.
So it's basically the fastest farm tractor on the planet.
The 5.
5 liter bi-turbo v8 drags this 2 1/2 ton box to unlimited top speed of 130 miles an hour.
And it shifts so fast.
It's 6,000 rpm.
Just rattling through the gears.
There's 80 miles an hour.
That was quick.
Zero to sixty was 5.
3.
Now we're at a hundred 110, finding seventh gear, there it is.
120 Holy crap, here comes the end of the runway, 125.
Ok, we're braking.
That's the most dangerous part, is actually the slowing down.
It sort of weeble-wobbles its way down to the stop.
The G63 is most definitely quick, but has all the leather and chrome transformed this deadly German Shepherd into an over-pampered poodle? This is a truck, and have no doubts, it is a truck, that has changed very little fundamentally since 1972.
But, the thing that gets me is why you would take one of the best off-road machines in the world, put 500 horsepower in it and make it a grocery getter for housewives of Beverly hills, where it will never see dirt, or dust.
Strange.
So with all these luxury and performance distractions, paparazzi that are more likely to shoot you than an opposing army, has it completely forgotten its roots as a genuine military truck? To find out, I was going to put it to the ultimate test of military toughness.
Right now, I'm on the northern border of fort Campbell, somewhere around here in a small town called Cassidy mout.
It's m-o-u-t, or "miltary operations in urban terrain".
Now, my objective is to get down here to a safe house on the Southern end.
It's about ten miles as the crow flies.
Normally that wouldn't be a problem.
But today isn't normal.
I'm going to be hunted by deadly screaming eagles.
The 101st airborne is one of the most decorated units in American military history.
These air assault specialists have played a pivotal role in every major conflict from world war 2 to Afghanistan.
Good afternoon, gentlemen.
Chief Etchler, strike two.
This will be an unclassified briefing.
Today we have identified objective delta fox.
The guys after me today are a part of the second brigade combat team called strike.
He was raised in Europe where he received training in advanced driving techniques.
His most likely course of action is going to be to flee the area.
It is of utmost important that you guys are able to acquire this individual without harm.
I've got no idea what they're going to send after me.
They could just launch a missile, blow me to bits and be done with it.
But they're under orders to take me alive.
Say it again, this is not a kill mission, this is a capture.
And, they describe themselves as discriminately lethal, agile and adaptive.
Let's hope so.
Gentlemen, are there any questions at this time? Very well.
Go get 'em.
The mission would start at 0800 hours.
As the crow flies, it was just ten miles from start to finish.
But Fort Campbell has over a hundred thousand acres covered with hundreds of miles of roads and trails.
The 101st had no idea which one I'd take.
Because they had to take me alive, they had to use all their training and equipment to lure me into an ambush.
All I had to do was stay out of their trap.
Let's go, let's go! Open it up, come on! This was it.
The G-wagon and I against the might of the U.
S.
army.
Whoa! This thing is a beast.
As I made a run for it The eagles launched something I wasn't expecting A shadow drone, capable of spotting a pimple from 18,000 feet.
All right, camera down now.
I got to go all the way out there.
My God, this thing is so fast on the gravel! Ok, that's 90.
Whoa! That is fast through that little town.
With two miles down and eight to go, I got the feeling I was being watched.
They're on to us.
Shadow two one, strike team.
Strike team, go ahead.
Target vehicle's moving at an extremely high rate of speed from west to east through range 63.
Drones are absolutely relentless.
Some guy in a basement somewhere with a joystick.
That was nuts! Two one, maintain contact, continue to report location.
Now that the drone had located me, it was just a matter of time before the next wave of attack.
The 101st were launching two $11 million Kiowa Warrior helicopters.
These front line armed reconnaissance choppers would take over from the drone as the eyes and ears of the strike team, firing intel for ground forces and air assault teams to coordinate the attack and force me to retract.
If I couldn't shake them, it would be game over.
Top Gear had challenged us to find the toughest, most unkillable car in America, - and after being shot - Oh! - Bombed, dropped - Oh-ho-ho! And raced without oil, my Toyota Corolla had won.
My prize was being sent to Kentucky to try to escape the 101st Airborne Division in one of the toughest suvs ever made.
This thing is a beast.
The Mercedes G63 AMG.
Leather and bling aside, this is one of the most capable off-roading combinations.
If they can catch me in this on these roads, I don't think anybody's really got a chance.
Ok, here's the road.
Finally get to pavement.
I can let this thing open up.
Go, go, go, go, go, go! I'd made it off the gravel onto Palmyra Road, the main supply route that would take me directly to the finish line just seven miles South.
Shadow two one, straight main, out copy.
Straight main, go ahead.
Mercedes traveling South, Route Palmyra.
Holy! Kiowa helicopters.
It's gettin' real now.
These reconnaissance choppers will be firing intel to ground and air teams to coordinate the attack, forcing me into their trap.
Outrunning them on pavement's my only chance.
They go 130 miles an hour, and so do I.
110! They are right on top of me, unbelievable.
Whoa! 130! The G-wagon's speed wasn't enough.
I needed to break free and head for cover.
Here's a road.
Here we go.
Whoa! This thing's a bit of a handful.
Ok, I need to get into thicker cover than this.
They can definitely still see me here.
Oh, I got to get deep in the woods here.
Here we go, this is it.
This is how you hide a white G-wagon in the woods.
My plan seemed to have worked.
Up above, the Kiowas had switched to a search pattern.
I had lost them.
But for how long? The proximity sensors that are valuable in the mall parking lot are exceptionally annoying when you're actually Using the vehicle off-road.
I don't know why I'm whispering.
But I couldn't hide all day.
God, it covers ground so good! The G-wagon is eating the jungle alive.
The military-ness of this truck is awesome.
You can see why the Germans just didn't even try to reinvent it.
Oh, my gosh, does it get the job done.
Ok, we're back on the road, back on the road.
Finally, I was back on the tarmac with no sign of the Kiowas.
Half a mile ahead, I needed to make a right turn.
Then it was just four Miles to the finish.
Things were looking up.
All right, it seems pretty clear out here.
I think my hiding in the woods actually worked.
Holy they're right back on me! If they tracked me through that, I am in trouble.
The Kiowas now started to direct the ground forces to intercept me, including state of the art M.
A.
T.
V.
armored trucks.
All right, this obviously is not working.
Safe house is Over there.
All right, I got a right turn up here.
Whoa! Big military trucks.
I'm out of here, out of here, out of here.
That's bad.
That's where I need to go.
If I thought that was bad, things were about to get a whole lot worse.
28 infantry troops and two black hawks were about to take to the sky.
This is blackhawk 3-0-0, flight 1-2, 6-0-3.
We're clear for take-off, four left base, rowling 2-3.
Mission commanders had chosen an ambush point based on the intel from the kiowas.
The question was, could the ground forces and kiowas force me into it, or could I find a way out.
This is getting Very dangerous.
With the infantry closing in and more than three miles to the finish, the 101st were tightening their net.
Holy crap! I'm boxed in.
This is the only place I can go.
He's on me! This is not going to end well.
As I searched for a new way out, the blackhawks were delivering the infantry to the ambush sight.
Go, go, go, go! Go, go.
Holy crap! How many helicopters are there? The road is being completely cut off.
Ok.
They're leaving me absolutely no choice.
I'm being toyed with right now by the 101st airborne division.
This is a bad place to be, I can tell you.
This is not good.
I got helicopters chasing me, I got 22,000 pound tanks with turrets chasing me.
Up ahead was an intersection.
Both ways led to the finish line, but one was a trap.
Now it was my turn to roll the dice.
Did I go left or right? There are not too many people that have been chased by these men and women of the 101st and gotten away.
I had just a mile to get he tree line in safety.
If I guessed correctly, I'd make it.
If not, I was heading into a world of pain.
My only hope is just to go ludicrous speed.
Move, move.
I had just 300 yards to go.
With no infantry in sight, suddenly, things were looking very good.
But then, I saw something I wasn't expecting.
Stop sign? There wasn't a stop right Spike strips! Spike strips! Stop the vehicle! Reverse, reverse, reverse, reverse.
Go get him, get him, get him, get him! Hands up! Hands up, get your hands up! Move, move, move! Get down on the ground, on the ground! Oh The eagles had forced me into their trap.
It was game over.
I'll help you up.
The might of the 101st had been too much to conquer, but despite losing, the G-wagon had surprised me.
Even though these days it may be more bling than bang, it still has the heart of a military monster.