Trinkets (2019) s01e03 Episode Script

P*ssy Palace

1 Ow.
Brady, you're on my hair.
- What? - Wait, just let me Hold on, I'm almost done.
I know, but Brady, can we Ow.
Shit! Someone's home.
Um, hey, Dad.
Hey, princess.
What up, B-man? Hey, just, uh, just doing some homework.
I thought you were playing tennis.
Well, I wanted to drop this off.
I know you can't go a day without it.
So, you, uh you catch the game last night? Yeah.
Stanford's killing it this season.
Still planning on applying early? - I'm almost done with my application.
- Good.
When you're ready, let me know.
I'll put in a good word.
The director of admissions was my fraternity brother.
Really, Dad? Because you haven't mentioned that one before.
All right.
I'm heading to the office.
- Tell your mom I won't be home for dinner.
- Even on a Sunday? Those phones don't buy themselves.
Let's be more careful with this one.
I will.
Bye, guys.
Spencer! Turn that down! Elodie, what are you doing? These blinds are shit.
- I feel like I'm in a prison.
- Okay.
So, we can replace them.
I'll talk to your dad.
It's an easy fix.
It's really hard to sleep in here.
- Spencer's so loud every morning.
- I know.
Those cartoons drive me crazy, but he's eight.
Forget it.
I have to get ready for service day.
I left you a KIND bar and Go-Gurt on the counter.
Go-Gurt? - You guys miss anything? - No.
Hey, I saw they hung your self-portrait in the main hall.
You know I love your photos.
When are you giving me a copy? You liked it? I really liked it.
Yo.
Hey.
Hi.
How you doing? - I'm good.
- Good.
You're not.
Look at these little hands.
Sit with me.
Thanks.
- I'm Elodie.
- AJ.
I was new, once upon a time.
I like your backpack.
Vintage JanSport is having its moment.
It was my mom's.
She's the one with good taste.
Love that.
I'm putting together a protest-inspired lookbook.
Do you mind? No, go ahead.
It has to be illegal for the school not to bring us water.
They told us to bring our own on the permission slip.
What, do you, like, work for the school? I know soccer is like all legs, but honestly, that's sad.
Your shoveling is so weak.
Mind your own business, okay? Maybe you are my business.
- Here.
- Stop! Put it in the bag.
Yo, dude, you mind? We're trying to work here, all right? Keep going.
- Keep going on your little bike.
- Brady, come on.
Come on.
What? Hey, guys, look, I can't tell.
Is he homeless or just having the most epic walk of shame? Come on.
Keep going.
Have you ever considered shaving your head? I don't think I have the right head shape for that.
Your instinct as the new girl is to blend in, when it really should be to stand out.
They're planting those trees too close together.
Amber! I said six feet! Here.
I'm really sorry about what happened back there.
Thanks.
Put your hand here and then just, like I remember you being much stronger.
Damn, so you're saying I fell off.
I mean, at least I don't have a complete winter body.
Don't you ever miss wearing pants? Don't you ever wanna dig a hole and bury yourself? If my goal was to bury a body, it would be yours, and trust me, you would be six feet under by now.
- Did you hear that? She threatened me.
- Hey, hey.
Okay, why don't we all just try to stay in the service-day spirit? Yeah? All right.
She's such a troll.
That was a little aggressive.
I was just kidding.
- Hey.
- Yo.
Where'd you go? Just shopping.
Oh, is that what you call it? I went to Hollister.
I like their jeans.
What are we doing here? Things are about to get interesting.
I caught you lookin' how'd you know my name There's something cookin' underneath my hood Can I help you with something? Yes, where is the "girl-on-girl" section? Aisle three.
- You're gay? - You are, remember? You can get something for your girlfriend.
Yeah, good idea.
Oh.
It's a little small for me, personally.
- Totally.
- I was kidding.
Me too.
So, this is where we hang out now? Yeah, you know, a real Central Perk.
I thought you were just fucking with me.
No, I'm learning Elodie's kinky.
And, sadly, that's kind of a compliment from this one.
I didn't realize how much horsepower this had.
Lingerie? Are you really that basic? What else are you into? Horoscopes and fat babies? Right.
Because if everyone likes something, it must be lame.
Kinda.
Yeah.
I hope it's for you and not him.
Because otherwise, lingerie is just some one-sided patriarchal bullshit.
So, is this more your speed? I got a bicycle I'm cruising down the street I like to keep it who's a freak in the sheets? I mean, at the very least, you could just not pick the obvious choice.
And what am I supposed to do? Listen to your relationship advice? I'm just saying, like Do you even care about what pleases you? What about you, Elodie? You're awfully quiet.
What about me? What kind of stuff are you and your girlfriend into? Um You know, just the usual stuff.
I don't really have a lot to compare it to.
Aw.
That's cute.
Like you've been with that many people.
Wasn't Brady the first guy you boned? Can you please not yell that out? - You didn't answer the question.
- Yes.
Okay, I mean, how many guys have you had sex with? Two or three.
Depending on how you look at it.
- Who? - Don't worry about it.
Uh, guys? I kind of need your help in here.
I'm stuck.
Oh, boy.
Okay, so, what's happening here? Well, I figured they haven't been washed.
- So - I got you.
Let me guess.
First time you guys did it was Valentine's Day.
I'm seeing, like, rose petals on the bed and shit like that.
No, actually it was winter formal and it was the first night we said, "I love you".
Sounds about right.
Sounds pretty perfect to me.
It was.
Oh, my gosh.
Free.
Actually, it was pretty quick.
That doesn't sound surprising.
Everything before sex is kind of the best part anyway.
Sex can honestly be so weird, but also really good.
How about you, huh? Have you and your girlfriend done it before? Yeah.
A bunch of times.
Really? 'Cause I'm getting major virgin vibes.
Ignore her.
Was your first time as special as a winter formal? It wasn't anything special.
It was just, like, a Tuesday.
It's cute.
And it's for me.
So what's it going to be? There's just so many.
I don't know.
Maybe this will work? What would you need a cock ring for? Like, a strap-on? - It feels a little advanced.
- Yeah, how would that even work? So, can you show us a photo of Zoey? Like, I really need a visual, and like, what is her last name? Or, like, what does she even look like? You never even show us her, ever.
Okay, fine.
I don't have a girlfriend.
I've never had a girlfriend.
I've never had sex.
So, what are you? Like, pathological? I didn't mean to lie.
I just kinda came out the other day.
So, who is Zoe? She's a friend from home.
She has a girlfriend, just not me.
I've wanted it to be something more, but she didn't.
That sucks.
You know what you need? This.
Because before you love someone else, you got to love yourself.
I didn't mean to make things weird.
Turns out, not all of your advice is useless.
Excuse me.
Can I check your bag? Oh, hello again.
Yeah.
We cool? Good, because I'm having some sensitivity down there.
You know how it is.
What are your thoughts on this brand of lube? Slick, Moe.
I seriously thought we were going to be caught for sure.
Not me.
Who Oh, Luca, what do you want from us? "Cool show tonight at PT, 10:00 p.
m.
" Luca's kinda hot.
What? I can still tell.
Yeah, if you're into the whole dark, mysterious Oh, shit, it's your dad.
Oh, shit.
Oh, fuck.
That's not your mom.
Well, you know I love when I can get you all to myself.
You say that, but most of the time, you have ten guys around.
Well, no one's around right now.
I actually just remembered I got something for us.
Oh, yeah? I just thought maybe we could try this.
Why? What for? I talked to friends and they said that this could make things a bit more fun.
I'm not sure how you want me to take this.
- Brady, I was just - No.
Fuck this.
God, why is nothing ever good enough for you? So that's it? End of conversation? Yeah.
You should go.
- Brady - No, I asked you to leave! Well, shit.
That's not great.
It's unlocked.
I've seen a porn that starts just like this.
I bet I know how it ends.
I didn't think you would be coming by.
Why? We had plans.
Remember? Yeah, I remember.
I also remember seeing you flirt with your ex.
What? Does sitting next to someone on the bus count as flirting? 'Cause if so, I may have a lot of people to apologize to.
Oh, so you're just a bus whore.
Got it.
Oh, you caught me.
Don't shoot.
This isn't about the bus.
She came for me and you didn't do shit.
I really don't understand you.
You want me to pretend like we're not tight, but you also want me to have your back? No, I just didn't take you for such a lemming.
- What's a lemming? - Forget it.
Come on.
I'm being serious.
What do you want from me? Right now, I just want you to leave.
Hi.
Um Look I know the kind of girl used to getting what you want.
I just can't be a part of your high school drama.
I'll see you around.

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