Underbelly s04e01 Episode Script

The Worst Woman in Sydney

(THEME MUSIC) SONG: # It's a jungle out there # It's a jungle out there # It's a jungle out there.
# JACQUI JAMES: Once upon a time.
there lived a beautiful queen called Kate.
Queen Kate.
Eileen, water's gone cold.
Eileen, move your fat rump! She was loved and admired by all her subjects.
You look like you've put on a few pounds.
Not up the duff, are ya? Piss off, Ma.
Scrub me back? Do it yourself.
Oh, go on, be a sport.
As far as Queen Kate was concerned.
the world was very nearly perfect.
There was only one small blot on the landscape.
and that blot was young and blonde and pretty.
She too was a queen.
and her name was Tilly.
WOMAN: Mirror, mirror, on the wall Queen Tilly.
who's the most gorgeous tart and all? "Matilda Mary Devine "it's just gotta be you.
" It was the 1920s.
the district of Darlinghurst.
Sydney.
Australia.
And the underworld was ruled by two rival crime queens.
Tilly Devine a new chum from England with a talent for acquiring brothels.
And Kate Leigh who had a stranglehold on the city's bootleg grog business.
MAN: Katie? It's five o'clock.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) WOMAN: Mmm, hi, boys.
Nice to see ya.
Mm-hm.
(SINGS) # Started out just drinkin' beer # I didn't know how or why or what I was doing # Darlinghurst was the Sin City of its time.
Punters flocked there to indulge their vices.
and they were rarely disappointed.
# Believe me it's nothin' to do for better # About the only thing you couldn't get in Darlo was a drink after six o'clock.
Legally.
that is.
Of course.
sly grog was available on every street corner if you knew where to look.
if you knew the right door to knock on.
And most of those doors were owned by Kate Leigh.
After hours.
a respectable butchers shop was liable to turn into a bingo parlour- 'bingo' being the slang for 'booze'.
# Me and Pat Malone drinking on our ow-own # Whoa-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh # Tilly Devine launched her career as a prostitute back in London at the tender age of 16.
# Oh, the nips are getting bigger # Yeah-ee-yeah Oh-oh # That's how she met and married a handsome Aussie soldier.
Jim Devine.
What a catch.
# Ooh.
they're getting bigger # By 25.
Tilly controlled 18 brothels in Darlinghurst alone.
all of them cheek-by-jowl with Kate's sly grog shops.
Evening, boss.
You look nice.
Very ooh-la-la.
# Ooh, yeah, the nips are getting bigger # Come on, sing it! You know the words.
The 1920s weren't known as the Roaring Twenties for nothing.
It was a party that never stopped.
# Yeah, they're getting bigger # Bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger # Yeah.
# MAN: One for the scrapbooks.
"Worst woman"? Ought to kick that reporter up the bum.
It's a nice likeness.
You look bonny.
(CHUCKLES) Judge says Kate Leigh must be the worst woman in Sydney.
That sounds about right - bloody old cow.
Where's me clean shirt? You're missing the point! They're talking about her by name.
No mention of Tilly Devine.
Oh, so you wanna be the worst woman in Sydney, do ya? Jim, I wanna be recognised for what I am.
I recognise you, sweetheart.
I'd recognise that arse of yours a hundred foot down a mine shaft.
Come here.
Even 90 years ago.
the cult of celebrity was irresistible.
The trouble was there could only ever be one "worst woman in Sydney".
Oh! Morning, Mrs Leigh.
You're looking well, Mrs Devine.
Mm, mustn't grumble.
(CHUCKLES) That's a very handsome dog you got there, Mrs Leigh.
It's a Pomeranian, I believe.
I found him wandering willy-nilly around Woolloomooloo.
Didn't I, Spot? (PLAYFULLY) Yes, I did.
Yes, I did.
You know the Royal Family have Pomeranians? Oh, for afternoon tea, you mean? On toast? Imagine the pups this little fella'd give ya.
Be pretty dandy, eh? Mrs Leigh, I don't suppose you'd mind terribly if I don't mind giving youse a loan of him, I suppose.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Can't stand the thought of giving him back to that old battleaxe.
I bet you she don't even stand up when they sing the national anthem.
Hey.
You're plotting something.
No.
Tilly had no intention of returning Kate's prized Pomeranian stud dog.
She'd keep him for herself.
and.
with the help of chemicals.
disguise one of her own infertile inbred pooches and give that one back instead.
Simple.
Excuse me, Mrs Leigh? Tilly says, "Thanks very much for the loan of the bonzer dog.
" And here's a box of chocolates, with her compliments.
(PLAYFULLY) Are you my little baby? Yeah? Hey, you! Stop it.
Spot, walkies! Come on, boy.
(DOG WHIMPERS) What's the matter? God, you're older than I am.
(KNOCKS ON DOOR) Get out here, you thieving Pommy bitch! Octopus, knock the fuckin' door down.
You know Big Jim keeps a.
303 under his bed? Oh, yeah? I'll do it myself, cowards.
You're both sacked.
(POUNDS ON DOOR) Piss off.
I'm trying to have a fuckin' snooze.
TILLY: Oi! Knock it off or I'll call the cops! You pinched me dog! I never did no such thing! I want him back! You've got bats in the belfry.
You're nothing but a common thief! Hang on a tick.
Gardyloo! Oh! Uh! (GIGGLES) YOU FUCKIN' WHORE! (LAUGHS) I was gonna suggest you kissed and made up.
Now you got yourself an enemy for life.
(PORTENTOUS MUSIC) Big Jim Devine was right.
Kate was way too proud to ever forgive Tilly for trying to pull the wool over her eyes.
And that's how Kate and Tilly's decade-long feud started - over nothing.
over a borrowed dog.
This is the story of that feud.
Hang onto your hats - it's not gonna be pretty.
Come on! Come on! We're selling sex, not pots of bloody jam! Elsie, open up your gown.
I wanna open another house.
A big joint.
Make a splash.
We can't handle what we got now.
Oh, bloody hell, Peg.
Don't tell me.
You're not in the family way again, are you? I'm sorry, Till.
Why'd you think they invented frangers? (SIGHS) Backyard, now.
Everybody else, tummies in, tits out.
I found us a place in Crown Street.
You find the muscle, I'll find the girls.
I dunno, sounds like hard bloody yakka.
Oh, think of the money, though.
Haven't we got enough coming in? What kind of talk's that? You know, I would love to buy you a big, shiny new car.
Yeah, right.
You ready, Peg? OK, come here.
Just relax, girl.
It's alright.
It's really just you shoving it up Kate Leigh, yeah? Yeah, so what? I'm gonna rub that hairy clam's ugly face in the dirt.
Show her who she's fuckin' dealing with.
Go on, one more.
For luck.
You know, I could see me-self in a roadster.
Yeah.
Nice little Pontiac maybe.
Ugh! Oh! (UPBEAT MUSIC) Alright, boys.
Let's get cracking.
Oh! And stay out! Ooh! Oh! Get out of here, you bastard! Oh! Frank Green? Who the bloody hell are you? They call me Big Jim.
Like to offer you a job, son.
Yeah, what doing? Arrrr! Uh! Ooh! Take a wild guess.
(BABIES CRY) Aw! Hello, dear.
My name's Tilly.
And I was wondering, how are you gonna support yourself and the bubba when they kick you out of here? What about it, mister? Hello, Nugget! How's it going? Tilly Devine, wherever did you get that delicious hat? I got a business proposition for ya, you and your molls.
What she talking about, Nugget? Don't you take my name in vain.
Simmer down, Aggie.
Don't I always look after you ladies? (SCOFFS) Any of you bitches steal my clients, I'll bite your nipples off.
TILLY: Settle down, Aggie.
We're all friends here.
Go on, have some snow on the house.
Celebrate opening night.
Anyone else want a little bit of magic dust? Make the night go better.
Enjoy yourselves, girls.
And let's all make a big pile of money.
All present and correct, boys? You're a veteran, Jim? Oh, checking up on me.
Belgium, eh? Crikey, you must've seen some action.
Oh, he did, inside every cathouse between here and gay Paris.
Some things a man shouldn't have to see, Frank - goes against God.
Wish I'd served.
I was too young.
Sniper - that'd be me.
Good with a gun are you? I would be if I had one.
Lee-Enfield.
303 - that's what I want.
It's the first choice of soldiers the world over.
Hard to fit in your pocket, but.
Here we go.
Gentlemen, welcome to Tilly Devine's Palace of Pleasure for a taste of heaven.
I'd have called it Big Jim's Palace of Pleasure.
He's wearing the trousers.
Oh, the law won't allow it.
Why not? See, menfolk is not permitted to live off the moral earnings of women.
But a sheila can? Oh, that ain't fair.
Hello.
Who's this little moppet? It ain't no schoolhouse round here, love.
Um, is this a bawdy house? There ain't nothing for you here, dear.
Best run along home.
I should say it is a bawdy house.
Thank you.
Well (CHUCKLES) What kind of job? As a prostitute.
How old are you, my darling? And still at school? Have a woman's body.
Shall I show you? (LAUGHS) You ain't done this before, have you, darling? Alright, give us a butchers at your thrupenny bits.
Show us your tits.
Oi, shoo! And close the door.
(WHISTLE BLOWS) FRANK: Police, police, police! Police! It's a raid! Get the snow off the girls.
Flush it down the grease trap.
You go out the back way.
Police! Oi, what's the big idea?! We're raiding you.
Step aside.
What for? Running a disorderly house.
Now out of the way, Tilly, or I'll flatten you too.
Oh, it's a fuckin' outrage! I wanna see your fuckin' warrant! Go on, get that shit down the sink! Come on, hurry up! Gotta get you the bloody hell out of here.
What's the emergency? You're jail-bait.
Time to go home, little girl.
Stop right there.
Police.
Special Constable Armfield.
Oh, Jesus.
Bloody hell.
If you're flushing down the drain, cease and desist.
Is this some sort of costume? (PHONE RINGS) (PEOPLE YELLING IN THE DISTANCE) ARMFIELD: What's your name? What were you doing in a brothel? You do know what a brothel is? I can see you're a good girl from a good home.
Would you like me to telephone your parents to tell them you're alright? Won't they be worried about you? It's none of your business.
My name's Lillian.
Nellie.
Nellie.
Nellie, it worries me when a girl like you finds herself consorting with ne'er-do-wells in a place like that.
I've seen many a young girl stray, and I hope you're not one of them.
It's all too easy to lose your reputation, and once it's gone, it is gone forever.
Promise me you'll go home and forget about tonight's escapade.
If I stay there, I suffocate.
I just wanna live a little bit.
As a prostitute? Just wanna have some fun.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) Can I go now? JACQUI JAMES: Lillian Armfield was the first female police officer in Australia.
possibly the world.
Her job was looking after fallen women.
Nellie Cameron.
the middle-class schoolgirl with the perfect vowels.
would be her greatest challenge.
Why tonight, eh? Opening night - how bloody mean can you be? We had reliable information, had to act on it.
Pull the other one.
Yeah, and I bet I know who shelfed me.
And the hairy fuckin' clam's gonna pay for it, you mark my words.
KATE: Oi, get Bill a scone.
I baked 'em meself.
Uh, the tea'll be fine.
Thanks.
Wally, the scones.
Mrs Leigh, I appreciate any information you can pass my way.
But I will not be used as a weapon in your war against Tilly Devine.
Oh, I don't know what you're driving at, Bill.
It's Inspector Mackay.
Oh Put them scones away, Wally.
Now you listen to me, Inspector Mackay.
I'm a good citizen.
Just trying to do me duty.
So if I happen to come across information pertaining to the criminal activities of a certain slut in Palmer Street, I'll expect you to act on it, alright? Or I'll write a letter of complaint to the Premier.
Madam, I will not be threatened by you.
Or anybody else.
Now hear this.
I intend to conduct a search of these premises for illegal firearms.
You'd leave me defenceless in the face of me enemies, would ya? Can always pelt them with your scones.
Oh (HALF-LAUGHS) MAN: "No more remarkable woman ever strode upon "the stage of Sydney's night-life than Kate Leigh.
" Yeah? What about it? That's Sydney for ya.
Pussy town.
You tried your luck up there, didn't you, Squizz? Came running home with your tail between your legs, as I recall.
The jacks had it in for me the day I got there.
You know that.
(LAUGHS SOFTLY) My point, Norman - them crooks up there soft as butter.
That town's ripe for the plucking.
Just as long as your name's not Squizzy Taylor.
A very disturbing rumour's reached my ears, Norm.
A gang of scallywags are planning to knock over the bookies at Moonee Valley.
You heard about it? Lot of crime around, Squizz.
But a major job like that needs my blessing.
Five years ago, maybe.
I still run this town.
Your name keeps coming up in connection, as it were.
Man's got a right to make a living, support his family.
You can't deny me that.
Don't I cut you a piece of what's mine? You're not doing the business no more, Squizz! Not since you come out of stir.
I'm as big as I ever was.
You're like a brother to me, Norm.
I trusted ya.
And now I find out you're a knocker in the woodpile.
Oh, it's nothing personal, Squizz! I take betrayal very fuckin' personal! Ooh! Uh Right, you've got two choices, mate.
You get out of Melbourne while the going's good or I'll end it right here.
'Cause I don't wanna wait around for the day you decide I'm in your way.
Always wanted to see Sydney.
(CHUCKLES) You show them pussies who's boss, eh? And do me a favour? Yeah? Kick Kate Leigh in the balls for me.
(LAUGHS) Ooh! Oh (COUGHS) Ooh! Ugh! Ugh! JIM: This is a Colt self-loading semi-automatic pistol, .
45 calibre.
Stop an elephant, if you hit in the right spot.
Side-arm of choice for the United States Army.
Mate, it's bloody beautiful.
Well, make sure you keep it that way.
It's yours.
Mine? Yeah.
Whacko.
How much? It's a present, you twerp.
Why? Me and Tilly been needing a gunman.
Now we got ourselves one.
"How do? Frank Green, gunman.
" "Frank Green.
Gunman.
" (EVOCATIVE MUSIC) Down, boy.
Not you again.
NELLIE: So, what do you think? Do I pass muster? Through 'ere.
Where'd you get the clobber? Took my savings out of the bank.
You know what you're letting yourself in for? Yes, I think so.
Mm? Doing it with strange men for money.
How old are ya? Don't bullshit me this time.
Oh! Same age as me when I started.
Any diseases downstairs? Course not, you're a virgin.
That's good, they're in short supply.
Alright, it's 10 bob for the hour - that's straight sex.
Double it if they wanna tie you up or do anything funny.
The whole idea is to get the fella do his business quick as you can.
That way we shove 'im out the door quick smart, ready for the next bloke.
Questions? Um how many times can I do it in a night? As many as I like? We're gonna get on fine.
(BRIGHT PIANO MUSIC) SONG: # You say.
"Don't think so" # I just want you to believe # Even though I know # It's impossible for me # There goes another day # Don't suppose I'll come out to play with you # I'll just sit at home # Write another song about how I wanted to # TILLY: Yours to spend on yourself.
Mine.
And this goes into a bank account in your name for a rainy day.
And here's a little pick-me-up.
Make you feel nice.
Is it Turkish delight? Yeah, something like that.
Go on, treat yourself.
Morning.
Have a good night? My first shift and I made £2 10s.
I'm a bit sore, though.
Hm.
Do you know any rooming houses around here? Sure I do.
I'll show you, if you like.
Thank you.
Frank.
Nellie.
Frank Green.
Matter of fact, they call me Frank 'The Gunman' Green.
Really? Why do they call you 'The Green Gunman'? (CHUCKLES) Nellie? I see you didn't take my advice.
That's very sad.
Why don't you go get yourself a bloody husband, you old bat? (UPBEAT MUSIC) JACQUI JAMES: And that's how the career of Nellie Cameron was launched.
Pretty Nellie - destined to become the most notorious prostitute of her generation.
Why did a middle-class girl from a good family choose such a life? What drew her to Darlinghurst? What was she running from? NORMAN BRUHN: Look at all that steam, eh? This is us.
WOMAN: Watch out, Keith.
NORMAN: Keithy, oh! He's getting big.
He is.
GUARD: Passengers are reminded this service terminates Passengers travelling to Sydney With you in a tick.
Come to see us off? I'm touched.
Wanna make sure you don't change your mind.
A stake to get you started.
SQUIZZY: And take this.
You might need it.
And do me a favour.
You come across a Melbourne bloke up there by the name of 'Snowy' Cutmore, put a bullet in his fuckin' head.
He's an evil fuckin' clam.
And, Norm? Don't come back.
Never.
(SIGHS) Are you excited, boys? Hm? First train ride.
What he want with you? Who? Taylor.
Nothing.
Tell me again why we're doing this.
It's a business opportunity.
(WHISTLE BLOWS) (TRAIN HORN BLOWS) (TRAIN WHEELS SQUEAL AND CLANK) Get your fresh rabbits! Rabbitoh! Get your fresh rabbits! Rabbitoh! Get your fresh rabbits! There's bound to be another bloody war.
I don't remember it, the first one.
I was only a child.
Oh, you're lucky.
Next time, they won't stop till we're all blown to fuckin' bits.
STREET SELLER: Rabbitoh! Get your fresh rabbits.
I should really go and join the other girls.
I'm supposed to start at 2:00.
Who's the boss here? You know, it don't matter how smart you are, how brave, how pretty.
In the end, a human life means nothing.
SELLER: Rabbitoh! God made you so beautiful, Nellie girl.
Enjoy it while you can.
You're right, get to work.
Leave the old soldier to get drunk alone, eh? Christ, my fucking feet are about to fall off.
(SIGHS) Where's young Nellie? With a client? She went home sick.
Gut ache.
Oh.
Big Jim offered to drive her home.
Oh Get your fresh rabbits! Rabbitoh! Lovely fresh rabbits, Tilly.
Fuck off! Right you are, then.
Fucking off as per instructions.
(OMINOUS MUSIC) (TILLY CRIES) Missus.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) A slice of bread? I was thinking blue for the Pontiac.
Sky blue.
Match your eyes.
No reason we can't splash out right now.
New place is looking pretty good.
Turnover's healthy.
You just can't keep your dick in your pants, can you? Oh, you bitch! (SCREAMS) Oh! Oh! Oh, fuck.
(CRIES) I got the best apples in Sydney! They're the best! Get 'em here! Get your apples here! Penny a pound! Hey, mister, sink your choppers into one of these beauties.
Sydney's best apples right here on your doorstep! Best apples in Sydney! Get your apples here! Pound a penny, penny a pound! I've got the best apples in Sydney! Get your apples here! Penny a pound! See ya, love.
The best apples right here on your doorstep! Come get 'em! You boys be good for your mother.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) SONG: # Your smile.
beyond compare # Your style.
so debonair # One look from you and time # Pot of beer.
No such thing.
I said, "A pot of beer.
" He's right, mate.
There's no such thing.
I'll give you a schooner.
Or a middy, if you're a woman.
You a woman, mate? Pot goes under the bed, mate.
Full of shit, generally speaking.
Maybe that is what he wants.
Ooh! Oh! Tell him, Tom! Take him! He's high! Police! Get off him, you two! Butt out, Wickham! I'll have the three of you nicked! Get off him! Sergeant Wickham, Darlinghurst Police.
Step outside.
Fuck off.
What's your name? What's your bloody name? Norman Bruhn.
You a stranger in town? I only ask because I notice you're carrying a firearm.
Where you from? Melbourne? Yeah, that's right, Melbourne, where we flatten nosy coppers just for fun.
You're not familiar with the Pistol Amendment Act, Norman? If you're carrying an unlicensed firearm, it's automatic prison time.
You hand over the gun or I'll arrest ya.
Where do you want it, flatfoot? Hm? (LAUGHS) Give me my fuckin' beer.
Ahh.
(THROWS COINS) Keep the change.
(CHILDREN GIGGLE) (CAR HORN BEEPS) Peg said you wanted to see me.
I did.
How are you enjoying the work? Um I like it.
Hm? Suits my nature.
Little Miss Popular, aren't ya? So pretty.
And we're both making money, that's good.
You ever lead my husband astray again, I will rip your pretty face right off.
It wasn't Shut your fucking pan! Don't you dare blacken that man's name! (SIGHS) Remember what I said, alright? And we might even be friends.
Understand? (EVOCATIVE MUSIC) (SNIFFS) MAN: Calling Matilda Mary Devine, James Edward Devine.
Your Worship, the charges are riotous behaviour, consorting with women of ill repute, running a disorderly house and indecent language.
Hang the buggers.
Be quiet or you'll be ejected.
I'll shut her up, Your Honour.
Shut up, Till.
They're dog thieves, Your Worship.
Throw the book at them.
Fuck off, dobber.
What are you doing? Are you peeling vegetables in my courtroom? KATE: Yeah.
They're for me dinner.
So? MAGISTRATE: Bailiff, remove that woman.
Lock her in the brig.
I'm not going anywhere.
Your Worship, can we not proceed Silence in court! You will be charged with contempt if you don't hold your tongue.
And you will speak only when I say so.
Otherwise, you'll find yourself sleeping in Long Bay jail tonight.
Repeat the charges, Inspector.
Riotous behaviour, consorting with women of ill repute, running a disorderly house and indecent language in public.
I know.
All 'cause of her.
Fuck it! Tilly! You know, a real gentleman would offer to carry this for me.
A real lady wouldn't be shelling peas in court.
Oi! Ooh! (UPBEAT MUSIC) Oh! Ooh! Oh! Oh! (CLOTHING TEARS) Ugh! Oh! Get her off! Teach you to fuckin' shelf me! Oh! (SQUEALS) Oh! Get a fire hose? Where from? (KATE AND TILLY CONTINUE STRUGGLING) Arr! Oh! JIM: She's got a gun! WALLY: Katie? Katie? Where's your smart mouth now, huh? (SCREAMS) (SCREAMS) You fuckin' WALLY: Shut up! Leave it! Leave it, Katie! You're dead, ya hear?! WALLY: Come on! What are you fuckin' looking at?! JACQUI JAMES: Taming pussy town was going to be a little harder than Norman Bruhn first thought.
KATE: Bloody hurts.
Go easy.
Get yourself killed one day.
(EXHALES) That's why you're here, Wal.
To protect me, on account of the fact that I'm a poor defenceless woman.
I'm serious.
Forget Tilly Devine.
How can I? Who cares if she opens up a hundred brothels? No, she wants me dead.
(SIGHS) Just wish she'd piss off back to bloody England where she belongs.
Then all me troubles would be over.
You'd just find yourself another mortal enemy.
(KISSES) Smoke.
Snowy Cutmore? Squizzy Taylor says hello Whoa, whoa.
I'm not here to kill ya.
What do you want? Well, I heard you were a cruel bastard.
You like hurting people.
You do it for money and you do it for fun.
Just the kind of man I'm looking for.
Hm.
Who the fuck are you? I'm the man who's gonna take down Kate Leigh and Tilly Devine, and you're gonna help me.
So, what do you say? You up for it? I say, "Fuck off.
I'm busy.
" Melbourne! What do you want? Putting a crew together, looking for good men.
Thought you blokes might be interested.
Work for you? Not a chance.
I'm paying top wages.
I don't trust Southerners.
SID: Bunch of gutless wonders.
Ooh! Ugh! (GROANS) Oh! Oh Ooh! Let him be, Sid! What are you doing here? Looking out for you.
Us Melbourne boys gotta stick together.
But why? Changed me mind.
Decided I want me a piece of Tilly and Kate.
Good man.
JACQUI JAMES: Norman Bruhn knew he'd found himself a powerful ally.
the first step to seizing control of Sydney's vice.
What he didn't know - he had only a hundred days to live.
SONG: # It's a jungle out there # It's a jungle out there # It's a jungle out there.
#
Previous EpisodeNext Episode