Upload (2020) s03e04 Episode Script

Download Doctor

- Oh, fuck! Fuckety, fuck-fuck!
- [VIV] Stay calm.
- We just have to stop the bleeding.
- It's just
Here. Um, put this up your nose.
Or-or this. Oh!
- Or-or this.
- A potato? Mom
Viv, stop. Look, you're making it worse.
Hold on. This. It's super absorbent.
- Oh.
- Aw, Nevaeh, you're all grown up,
but, guys, it's a nosebleed, okay?
It's-it's already stopping. I'm fine.
- It's fine. I'm fine.
- [NORA] Okay, what if it's not?
All right? Rupert
Tilford had a nosebleed
right before his, you know, his head
Blew up all over the place.
Honey, maybe you should go see a doctor.
[NATHAN] What's a doctor gonna do, Mom?
I'm a scientific anomaly.
Look, he's right, a
regular doctor can't help,
- but the doctor who invented download might be able to.
- Nora.
Look, I found him. Oscar
Mayer Intel fired him
but he's still living in San Francisco,
and-and it's not that far.
I'm supposed to be laying
low. Public transpo has
more cameras than a movie premiere.
- I'm fine.
Have you guys ever flown private?
I've got a hookup. You're gonna love it.
- You were the last one ♪
- Video ♪
Killed the radio star ♪
Video killed the radio star ♪
'Cause in my mind and in my car ♪
- Hey. Movie's over.
- We can't rewind, we've gone too far ♪
[SIGHS] Oh, we should
be at the doctor's soon.
I was thinking
I don't think we should
tell him I'm a download.
The more people that know about it,
the more dangerous it is, right?
So just, please, promise
me you won't say anything.
Fine. I promise.
So what are we gonna do?
I have a plan.
Do you actually have one
or are you just saying it confidently?
I'm just saying it confidently.
Well, you sounded sexy saying it.
Maybe I should come over there, then.
Maybe you should.
I'm okay.

Ooh, that's cute.
Caption: "business trip, bitches."
Hashtag "retreat yo self." Post.
Oh, take another one.
Take another picture.
Oh, my battery just died.
Oh, it's so crazy how that happens
almost every time we
take a
take a photo.
Sorry, I
I popped, like, three
Ambiens on the plane.
Three Ambiens?
I don't sleep since my husband left me.
Lucy, I had no idea.
It's okay.
Look, I can't believe
that I am saying this,
but if you ever need s
Good talk.
What is she doing in San Francisco?
Call Nora.
Hey. It's been a while.
You will not believe where I
What is that noise?
Uh leaf blowers.
L.A. people are so
bougie with their lawns.
Oh, you're in L.A.?
Yeah, yeah.
Uh, in-in a sauna. Whew.
- Why?
- Nothing. Never mind.
Um okay.
Hey, you know what, I'm kind
of in the middle of something.
So, um, catch up later?
Yeah. Sure. Whatever.
- Car, child locks on.
Do the choppy-choppy thing.
Fast enough?
Oh, I have to go.
Hey, I'm still covered in oil.
So, what do you want
to do today, Brownie?
I'm down for anything as
long as it doesn't cost money.
Don't you work today?
Nope. Shop's closed. Ringworm outbreak.
Mr. Brown. Fifth floor?
- Yes, please.
- Oh, uh, push it yourself
- 'cause I'm on lunch.
- What?
It's 9:40 a.m.
What do you even eat?
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Oh. Okay, frisky.
No, Luke told me about a hack
to get to the first floor,
but we've never been able to try it
'cause the AI guy doesn't
let us push the buttons.
Baby, this is the first floor.
No, no, no, no.
Like, the very first first floor.
Okay? The showroom for the
Lakeview 1.0 beta version.
It's super lame, but it has a
bar with a free drunk setting.
Hmm. Well, I guess it was just a myth.
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
- That was fun.
- Yep.
Not again.
Ms. Kannerman's gonna kill me.
[LUKE] I'm so screwed.
If I don't find funding by tonight,
I'll be joining you down there tomorrow.
At least you get apples
for snacks. I-I like apples.
It's an onion.
Ugh! Blecch. God.
I can't munch onions
like a fucking horse.
Uploads are not allowed to work.
How am I supposed to
keep myself in the style
to which I have become accustomed?
I know a way.
Are you willing to do
something a little sketchy?
Yes. What is it?
Okay, so,
head into the Grey Zone, go south.
You'll see a warehouse.
Ask them where the cheese
is. They'll hook you up.
Grey Zone south, warehouse,
cheese. Grey Zone south,
- warehouse, cheese. Got it.
- Cheese.
- Thanks, Yang.
- Hey. So,
you're cool and I feel
like we really click.
Would you maybe want to go on a
Huh. Wonder what she was gonna say.
Yeah, Grey Zone south,
warehouse, cheese.
Grey Zone south, warehouse, cheese.
Can I help you?
Hi. Yes. My husband,
or common-law spouse
irrelevant info, but, um,
we were taking a nice
walk and we got jumped.
Oh, my God. By whom?
Hoodlums. Just violent hoodlums.
- [MAN] Are you okay?
- [NORA] I-I am,
but, um, he got kicked in the head.
Ow. Fuck.
- Unbelievable.
- Could I borrow your phone to call a doctor?
Well, I could take a
look at him. I'm a doctor.
- What? Oh.
- Are you really?
- Unbelievable.
- Oh.
[NATHAN] Thank you.
Man, you're limping. They
really roughed you up, huh?
Oh, no. I sprained my
ankle kicking their asses.
But, oh, they got me
with a cheap shot. Ow.
- Ow.
- Straight through.
[MANSOUR] A hundred
years ago, Founders' Grove
started as an elite institution
where a handful of powerful
and morally corrupt men
would retreat to make decisions
that would affect everyone.
But today, it welcomes our women
and gender-diverse into the fold.
No one is as naturally
devious as those non-male
Horizen rock stars.
So, please join me and give them a big,
inclusive round of applause.
[LUCY] Thank you. Thank you.
All right, thank you. Thank you, Lucy.
- Thank you.
- [MANSOUR] Mm-hmm.
So, PaneraAeon's been
growing their subscribers.
But we've stalled.
Last quarter was so bad
we had to shut down our
Civic Integrity unit.
I want to hear some big-picture ideas.
Aleesha, let's hear your thoughts,
no matter how
disorganized or histrionic.
Uh uh, yeah. Uh
Actually, my family
recently visited Lakeview.
So, did they love it
or did they love it?
They thought it was crusty as hell.
Look, I have money
for the first time in my life.
I can afford to upload to Lakeview,
but I wouldn't want to.
I get that
I'm not Horizen's target demo,
but why can't I be?
Sorry, guys, she's new to this.
I would like to hear more.
Where are the clubs or the sports teams?
I heard, hush-hush, from my nurse friend
at Mt. TacoBell-Sinai, that
Adele is on her last legs.
Why don't we lock her down
before PaneraAeon does?
What do you think, Karina?
It's bold. I like it.
Well done, Aleesha.
Uh, I know another demo we could target.
Research suggests
children recognize brands
by one and a half to two years of age,
and brand allegiance follows soon after.
So, let's get 'em excited about dying
before they learn to
read the fine print.
Jesus, Luce, you're a mother.
That was Vern's idea. He has no shame.
- [MANSOUR] Oh, God.
- Vern!
Yes. Definitely.
There's no sign of a concussion.
Well, can you scan the rest
of him, just to be sure?
I mean, those hoodlums
they beat him like a piñata.
Okay, that's an exaggeration.
Normal lungs, normal stomach.
Upper GI, lower GI. Penis.
All in excellent shape.
You only have 14% body fat.
That's very fit.
Fourteen? It's usually ten.
Everything is checking out normal.
You're free to go.
Okay, great. Thanks, Doc.
He's a download.
[CHUCKLES] She-She's kidding.
No, I'm serious. He is a download.
No, we've been day drinking.
We are so drunk.
You know what? Check,
if you don't believe me.
[NORA] "Property of Ingrid Kannerman."
It says that?
How long have you been downloaded?
Twenty-six days.
Look, and I-I know the longest
a download pigeon has lasted is 84,
but considering that
he weighs a lot more,
- that maybe
- [KAPOOR] Oh, I see
you have a medical degree
- from the University of TikTok.
Well, don't you want
to hear how he's doing?
I mean, his stomach's a mess.
Everything's spicy,
and he farts constantly.
[GASPS] You noticed.
Also he's had a nosebleed.
Actually, I've had four nosebleeds.
I want you to take one
of these every morning
to manage your symptoms.
And if they get much
worse, then re-upload.
Now, forget that you ever saw me.
And if you come back here again
I'll have you arrested
for trespassing. We clear?
Okay. Is there a symptom that
maybe we should look out for,
like go to the hospital and upload if
- Call NextDoor-ADT.
- Hang up.
Call Domino's. Thanks, Doc.
- [OPERATOR] Yeah, Dr. Kapoor,
what's your pizza order?
I'll take a personal pan
with pepperoni and jalapenos.

- Is that
- Uh
Hello, adventurous dying person,
and welcome to Lakeview, a
digital life extension by Horizen.
I'm looking up reviews
from when it first opened.
"One star. My avatar has no eyelids
and also no butt crack.
It's just one big cheek." Oh, God.
"The creepy concierge stares
into my soul." [SHORT CHUCKLE]
"To be honest, would
choose death next time."
Where's the cheese?
Oh, you're my kind of mouse, beefsteak.
Headset, script.
Cheese is for closers.
You're late.
Because you had me combing through
eight hours of surveillance tapes.
And? Was he at Freeyond?
You're asking me if Nathan Brown
the guy we killed,
the guy who lives across
the hall from you
you're asking me if he came
back to life for an afternoon
so he could spy on our
meeting and clean bathrooms?
It would be unwise of
you to keep implying
that I have digital dementia.
Do yourself a favor.
Beef up the security
- for tonight's meeting.
- Yeah, I'll get on that.
Who do you want me to call,
Ghost Blasters? [SNORTS]
It's "Busters," you twit.
Ghoul Busters?
Have you dreamed of
upload for a loved one
but never been able to afford it?
UpandUp will get them
situated and conscious
within a week of your check clearing.
And here's the best part.
We'll set them up with
a job in our call center
to make them self-supporting."
[WOMAN] Isn't that illegal?
The three regulations:
can't vote, can't work,
can't copy.
We are anticipating
a change in the rules
with the next election.
Trust me, I'm an upload,
and I'm taking advantage of this.
- And your son
- [MAN] Elijah.
Elijah's going to love working here.
Better than being stuck
on some drive. [CHUCKLES]
[MAN] Can we think about it?
This offer will not last
forever, but if you act now,
- Elijah will.
[BOTH] We're in.
Great. I'll email you the paperwork,
and have a blessed day.
Delores! Got 'em!
First sale. Congrats
I mean, that doctor was acting off.
Wasn't he off?
I-I don't think you
should take those pills.
Oh, I have an idea.
How about I promise you
I won't take the pills
and then, without talking to you,
I just start taking the
pills? Mmm. Kind of like this.
Oh. Hilarious.
Yeah, you know, I love bits
where people I care about
most in the world die
right in front of me.
- It's so fun.
- Forget it.
[SIGHS] Can we hack a Casper
Sit and Sleep drone this time
and fly home on a mattress?
Well, I was thinking we
should stay here for tonight.
- Mm-hmm.
Whatever would we do here
without my mom and Mauricio hovering?
Uh, well, one of them has
a grandchild in the Castro,
and the other's wife lives in Chinatown.
Deliver hard drives.
So hot.
- Wow.
I mean, I know I shouldn't,
but I kind of love the tartan.
Argle? Argyle? Plaid?
Ingrid. Shit.
- Boo! Aah!
- Aah!
- Shit.
- I scared you. I scared you.
- No.
- Yes, I did.
- No, you didn't.
Admit it.
- Oh, what is
- What?
Oh, here's the switch.
- Whoa!
Hey, man, uh
we're not looking for trouble, okay?
We're just looking for the bar.
The bar is just over here.
Ingrid, stop messing around.
Have a blessed day.
Five sales, five bitcoin.
Zalan's happy, beefsteak.

Hey. Can I hide here?
Mansour got pulled into a meeting,
and I swear I will sui-scan right now
if I have to talk to Vern ever again.
- Yeah. Hide with me.
Thank you.
It's Aleesha, right?
- Karina.
- I know.
You're kind of a big deal here.
After today, I'd say
you're the big deal.
I've been trying to get Mansour
to modernize Lakeview for years.
You got him there in 30 seconds.
That's that's some skill.
[BARTENDER] Can I get you a drink?
Yeah, what are you having?
A dirty martini.
That sounds perfect.
It has been a while since
I had a free night, though,
so I might have to
remember how to have fun.
- It's easy.
- We got a open bar.
- Oh, well, then let's get some tallboys
- after these martinis.
- Wow.
Someone from upper management
knows what a tallboy is?
You are not the only
one who didn't grow up
in Horizen's target demo.
Actually, would you want to go somewhere
a little more quiet?
Yeah. Sure.
My buddy from college,
Holden, lives in this building.
Oh, I don't want to
put your friend at risk.
Eh, Holden's a bicoastal lawyer.
Place is always empty. Oh.
We can crash here.
How are we gonna get in?
back, Nathan Brown.
You're saved in the door?
Yeah. I actually used to live here.
Oh. So you two were roommates?
Um, I'm gonna go wash up, okay?
Okay. I'll find some food.
Huh. I guess Holden's a
bit of a plant daddy, huh?
- [WHISPERING] Nathan. I think we were followed.
- Nathan.
- What the fuck?
- [EXCLAIMS] Oh Holden.
Oh, my God. How
You're dead. I went to your funeral.
Are you a ghost?
No, I'm not a ghost.
Look, this might sound crazy, but
I downloaded.
- You downloaded?
- Yeah.
And then you came to see me?
- Oh
- That's so fucking romantic.
- Oh, um,
- um
- Hi. Hey. Hi.
Norm-Norma Nor-Nora,
Holden. Holden, Nora.
Old college buddy, huh?
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
I mean, technically, we
were buddies in college,
and then also
hung out, uh, off and
on, for several years.
- Hung out?
- Hung out?
- Yeah. Yep.
- Yeah.
We'll talk about this later.
- Super.
- Do I know you from somewhere?
We met at Nathan's funeral.
Oh, right. Sorry, you just
looked different ambushing
me in my apartment.
You were his coworker, right?
Actually girlfriend now.
Oh, ha.
This is very awkward.
So, I totally misread
this situation, yeah?
So, what are you doing here?
I will explain everything,
but we're starving. Can we eat first?
Or we could leave,
because clearly we're
imposing on your ex-girlfriend.
It's-it's fine. It's okay.
Uh, there's an Indian place nearby.
- That might kill me.
- [NORA] Yeah.
Nathan can't really handle
spicy food since he downloaded.
Oh, geez. I could order a pizza.
No mushrooms. I know you're allergic.
That would be great, but way too spicy.
Do you have anything
less hot than cereal?
I could Golden Retriever
a bag of marshmallows.
Yes, perfect. And maybe
some marshmallow fluff,
if it's not too much trouble?
Maybe some egg whites.
Looks like you've had a
little too much fluff, yeah?
You know, I was
thinking about you during
all this Freeyond business.
It reminded me of your startup.
Mm, Freeyond. What a shit show.
Yeah. My firm looked into suing them,
but it was a nonprofit,
so, no deep pockets.
They didn't even have
insurance against Ludd attacks.
Honestly, the whole thing makes me sick.
Well, the Ludds had
nothing to do with it.
How would you know that?
It's okay.
It's a little bit of a long story.
You called, sir?
[MANSOUR] Can we start?
Where's, um, Looney Tunes?
It's best Mr. Choak no longer attend.
Oh, sad.
Let's discuss midterms, shall we?
- [WOMAN] Oh, okay. Yeah.
So, there are deep
pockets behind Freeyond.
The deepest.
I'm gonna take this back
to the senior partners.
I think we could start
a class action suit
on behalf of all those poor folks
on the drives. You could be
a real help to us if you wanted.
- That would be amazing.
- Yeah?
Yeah. Whatever you need.
Aw. Poor guy ate too many marshmallows.
Call Baskin Robots and tell them
to fire up an exo-suit for me.
If they think I'm too unstable
to attend an AR meeting,
I'll crash it myself.
Smart. Nothing says stable like
kicking in the door in a robot suit.
I don't need any attitude from you.
You're a sucker fucker, aren't you?
How do you know that?
Choak Enterprises owns the company
that makes your dirty little dirt devil.
You'd be surprised at the amount
of data we're able to collect.
Let's get you in that robot suit.
last man standing down here, huh?
[MAN] Yeah. The others
upgraded for eyelids
and butt cracks, but
I kept my first data plan.
Who needs eyelids?
Hundred and eighty degree field of view.
Best seat in the house. [CLICKS TONGUE]
That sound is me winking at you.
Ah, aw No.
This shit's getting old, though.
So, you and blondie pretty serious?
Uh, I don't know. We break up a lot.
Really? From what I saw, you
guys seemed good together.
Hmm. I don't know. It's complicated.
I have a, uh, unique
history with her dad.
And, um, there was this
girl who worked here
who I got kind of hung up on.
So, why aren't you with that girl, then?
She left.
I have no idea where she is.
I'm sorry, man, you don't
want to hear all this crap.
Hey, hey, come on, come on, come on.
Does it look like I have
anything better to do?
Go on.
I don't know, it's kind of weird.
Ingrid has lied to me so many times,
but I still trust her to
always be there for me.
Does that make sense? I'm
suddenly are finding
it hard to think.
And heavy.
Oh, that's because
I'm absorbing your life force.
Oh. Cool.
Wait. What? How?
A bug. There's tons of them down here.
But this one's definitely the most fun.
Oh, here we go.
- It's embarrassing.
Are you gonna kill us?
Just enough drainage so you can't leave.
It's lonely down here.
Plus, I'm probably
gonna borrow your eyelids
- and butt crack.
- [GASPS] No.
Babe, thank God you came back.
Fucking vampire. God.
I saved us, Brownie.
Yeah, you did, babe. I love you so much.
I love you, babe.
What? What, is he still awake? What?
Why! Won't! You!
Go! Down?! [GRUNTS]
Babe, babe, babe, babe, babe, babe.
- No eyelids, remember?
- Oh. Duh. [CHUCKLES]
Play it cool. Everything's normal.
No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You leaving already?
I was trying not to wake you.
I got to catch my flight back.
Well, I think you forgot something.
Looks like maybe a pillowcase.
I was planning on keeping
it professional this weekend.
And what is the profession
that wears these?
Just throw them away.
And let housekeeping
see them in my trash?
- Just
You're gonna make me miss my flight.
You can come back with me on my jet.
Yeah, maybe we should keep these.
I don't know if the
jet's got a parachute.
I have no record ♪
Of brighter days ♪
Your light is on me ♪
I can say ♪
I have no parts ♪
- I have no lines ♪
But I have you ♪
And you have me, honey ♪
Water's wet and ♪
Light is light ♪
Got upset and now I'm ♪
Doing fine ♪
When I come home ♪
When I calm down ♪
I have you ♪
You have me, honey ♪
Summer breaks ♪
Winter storms ♪
I don't mind ♪
Getting on ♪
'Cause we're going, living ♪
Glad to be ♪
'Cause I have you ♪
And you have me, honey ♪

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