Waterloo Road (2006) s02e09 Episode Script

Series 2, Episode 9

So when's the wedding, then? - Is it too much? - The consummate head teacher.
I hate having to kiss the backside of the governors.
You know how much you'll hate it if they don't give you the job.
Give us the job, Kim.
This wonderful management team I have assembled and all the benefits we're bringing to Waterloo Road.
Do you have any fans amongst the children? I can't believe I've got to be interviewed by the kids.
In my day, the children went to school, they didn't run it.
Sorry to interrupt, but Dale Baxter went AWOL again this afternoon.
- You are joking.
- God, that's all we need.
Uh, right.
I'm going to go and phone the Education Welfare Officer.
And say what? - Uh, that we're dealing with it.
- We're not though, are we? The boy hasn't been in school five minutes in the past eight months.
It's ludicrous.
There is such a thing as school phobia, Andrew.
In my day it was called skiving.
Anyway, it's out of our hands now.
We'll have to let the Police Liaison Officer know.
Jack, come on.
They'll put Mrs Baxter in prison.
She's denying her child an education.
To me, that's a serious criminal offence.
Sorry, Kim.
We're duty bound.
Look, I don't care about being seen to be tough on issues like this.
Well said, Jack.
Right, we're all laid out and ready to go.
- See, I told you it'd look good.
- Bring it on.
I hope this does help jack impress the board because it's not going to impress anybody else, least of all Dale Baxter.
Sounds like you don't want Jack to get the job.
Of course I want him to get the job.
I just hope this isn't the start of some zero tolerance policy 'cause we all know how successful that was last time, don't we? Yeah, well, if the other choice is Lyndsay Woodham, we wouldn't be able to discuss our Dale Baxters with her.
She'd be too busy with a spreadsheet.
Well, obviously, there are worse types than you.
She is not an educationalist.
Waterloo Road is just a stepping stone.
In two years, she'll be offered some highly paid management consultancy job.
Andrew, I'm not saying that I want Lyndsay Woodham to get the job.
Then stop rattling Jack.
You know what he's like.
If he loses confidence, he overcompensates with bombast.
just got to keep him buoyed up and focused.
Yeah, okay.
Shut up.
You're making me nervous now.
jack! just wanted to say good luck from all of us in the staff room.
Great, thanks.
I'll be rooting for you.
Sticking pins in me Lyndsay Woodham doll.
Well, she's just about to arrive, so if you could - Oh! New tie? - Steph.
I would, er, take the label off if I were you.
Don't want to look too eager.
- Okay, uh, can we get on with this now? - See you later.
What a welcoming party.
We've, erm, set up some cheese and wine in the common room.
- Nigel, our favourite governor.
- Hello, Jack.
- This is Lyndsay Woodham.
- Welcome to Waterloo Road, Lyndsay.
Thank you.
Nigel's just been telling me all about it.
- You two know each other? - Nigel was my husband's best man.
I've come to get me sports bag.
The smell coming off it is enough to knock out a police horse.
I want all your stuff moving out, Tom.
Well, you've seen Lorna's flat.
It's tiny.
I can't keep it there.
Not planning to move into a spacious apartment, then? Now you're a two wage family again.
What? With two people earning two wages living under one small roof.
Meanwhile, me and the kids have to trip over your stuff.
I'll shift it as soon as I can.
I just don't wanna fork out 30 quid a month on storage, that's all.
You didn't have to move to Lorna's, Tom.
Well, at least she was willing to help me when some kid has some pathetic schoolgirl crush and my life ends up in a suitcase.
You, again.
I could flaming kill you, I swear I could! I can't put up with this any more.
Getting called at work to be told you've done another runner.
You promised me you'd stay this time.
Don't you give a damn about me? Mum, it's not about you! I hate school.
And I hate dragging my backside out of bed everyday to go and pack shampoo bottles into boxes, but I do it for you.
What's happened to you? - You used to be a lovely little boy.
- Well, I'm not now, okay? (BANGING ON DOOR) Police, Mrs Baxter.
- I'm coming.
- Don't you dare.
They're coming in anyway.
Save forking out for a new door.
- Please.
- Calm down.
(BANGING ON DOOR) (DOOR OPENING) Thanks for organising this evening, jack.
I think it's been very useful.
Well, as you suggested, it's best that everyone gets the opportunity to meet in a relaxed environment before the main event.
- Good night, gentlemen.
- Good night.
And I'm counting on your support tomorrow.
Our little pact.
I wouldn't count on anything if I were you, Jack.
You know what I'm talking about.
Roger, it's been a pleasure to meet you.
Nigel, will you give my love to Karen? Well, we'll see you both in the morning.
Good night.
It's good to meet you, Jack.
It's nice to know what I'm up against.
I'm not sure that you do, Lyndsay.
You know, these schools are pretty scary places.
You can't get all your answers out of a filing cabinet.
Really? Well, you're on your own.
There's no one to hold your hand.
I think I know what it takes to be a head.
But do you know what it takes to be a head teacher? I'm sure they'll pick the best person for the job.
- Good luck.
- Good luck.
Well? That Lyndsay Woodham wouldn't last two minutes in a bear pit like this.
Yeah? - Did Aspinall say anything to you? - About what? I don't know.
I don't trust him, that's all.
You were great tonight.
Thank you.
I just don't want to be living with some run-of-the-mill scuzy teacher now, do I? - I've done nothing wrong.
- Well, what are you taking her for? You're being arrested on failure to attend court.
- You do not have to say anything - Court? What court? All the letters you received, Mrs Baxter, about Dale's non-attendance at school.
I got a couple of letters.
I didn't think they were serious.
You can't lock me up.
I've got work in the morning.
Look, mate.
It's me that's not gone to school.
What's she done wrong? Wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for you.
- I'm trying to sort it out.
- You're going the wrong way about it.
Now sit down! And button it.
- Who are you? - I'm Francine, I'm your social worker.
Sod off.
I don't need you.
You're going to have to pack a bag, Dale.
Eh? What are you talking about? I'm going to have to take you to a children's home, I'm afraid.
just for a while.
This is illegal.
Have you got kids? Bet you don't get a smack in the mouth for trying to get 'em to school! All the graft I've put in, all the knock backs, nearly been burnt alive in me office.
And they wanna go and give it to someone else for the glory? Stop angsting.
You'll be great.
It's not the presentation I'm worried about.
It's all the awkward questions from the kids.
I mean, I remember what I was like when I was 15.
just show them a bit of respect.
It's them that should be respecting me.
Morning, Dale.
Hope you're ashamed of yourself.
Making me call the police, what you've done to your mum.
You don't care about me or my mum.
He's gonna try and change his ways.
Aren't you, Dale? Do you want to come to my room and have a little chat? I don't mean to pry, but Tom told me about last night.
Told you what? It's just like him to dump his stuff, isn't it? You don't need it, cluttering up the house.
It's not about clutter.
It's about moving on.
- Or not, as the case may be.
- Thought you'd made up your mind.
So how long is he gonna hang around yours like a bad smell? He's not a bad smell.
Seriously, you know he's not.
Tom and I are getting along just fine.
You don't have to worry.
Well, that's great.
I'm really pleased.
I don't think I could have imagined being like this with Tom a year ago.
But I think my priorities changing has finally made me grow up.
Well, maybe you could give him a few pointers from me.
Tell him it's not a girlfriend he needs, it's a nanny.
- What next? Water torture? - I'm quite looking forward to it.
We're ready for you.
Take a seat, Mr Rimmer.
Listen, I know what you must be going through.
No, you don't.
All right.
Well, maybe you can help me try, then.
You're under a lot of pressure now, Dale, I know.
That can make us do things the opposite of what we know is right, but you've got to fight it.
- Your mum's in prison.
- Well, I flaming know that, don't I? All right, then.
Can you tell me what it is about school that you are worried about? - Are you scared of being bullied? - No.
Or of making a fool of yourself in front of your mates during lessons? No.
It just does my head in.
- What particular part? - All of it.
I don't even see the point in school anyway.
You don't learn anything.
- It just gets like booging.
- Less of the language.
I learn more on me computer at home.
See, that's where you're wrong.
School can be fun.
And it can be exciting and, yeah, it can be hard work, but you get a sense of achievement from it that you don't get sat in your bedroom looking at the web.
So what? What do I need do to make this day as easy as possible for you? Get me mum out.
Look, if you can get through today, I can say that you've been cooperative.
And that'll look really good for your mum when she does go to court.
It won't matter what you do.
- I'll still hate it.
- Oh, come on.
Look, you've got Miss Redpath's drama class first thing.
- I think you'll enjoy it.
- No, I won't.
BRETT: Do you think teachers who can't spell should go on courses? Who says my teachers can't spell? I didn't say they were your teachers.
You haven't got the job yet, have you? (LYNDSAY SPEAKING) Ten out of ten for your observational skills.
Back to the spelling issue if you don't mind.
I've drawn up a list of teachers who make regular spelling mistakes.
Mr Dawson, chemistry.
Are we sure he's got a degree? How do you feel about religious dress, such as the Hijab being worn? If you can wear a crucifix, you can wear a Hijab.
What do you think about the school's uniform? It's supposed to make us equal.
Uh, Mr Lamb, Mr Crawford is just appalling and Miss Haydock.
(LYNDSAY SPEAKING) Tell you what.
Why don't you give me that list and I'll give them all two weeks in the cooler? You don't seem to be taking this very seriously.
Decided to pop in and join us today? Well, it's good to see your face anyway.
Why don't you put your bag over there and then I'll explain what we're doing? What do you think's the best way to deal with bullying? Well, there's, er, different types of bullying.
There's psychological, verbal, vicarious.
You You have to listen to the victim very carefully and then you have to act.
To tackle the bullies and confront them with the consequences of what they've done.
What do you think about school dinners and all this healthy eating stuff? We're trying to improve the issue of healthy lunches.
We're providing more options, more fruit and veg.
We've even got Jamie Oliver booked in for next Tuesday.
Do you mind the fact that we have a hand in whether you get the headship or end up teaching history again? Well, I wouldn't, uh - I don't mind.
- I think we've heard enough, Mr Rimmer.
If you'd like to make your way to the other panel now, please.
Little prat.
- Who? - Brett flaming Aspinall.
Who else? Why don't they just appoint him headmaster? Cut out the middleman? - Rubbish.
- He's got it in for me.
I swear he has.
Don't be paranoid.
He's just a kid showing off.
If I lose out on this job because of that little Do the Great British public know what flaming hoops we have to jump through to run a school? No wonder one in three positions aren't filled.
- Am I bovvered, though? - But he really, really likes you.
- Yeah, but am I bovvered, though? - So, what, you just gonna leave it? - Does my face look bovvered? - You've been with him for ages.
- Yeah, but I ain't - Stop there.
Right Yeah.
That was quite good.
Umm Dale, what do you think? I I think she's waiting too long for her to interrupt her.
It should be like almost talking over her.
Well, that's exactly what I think.
What you got to do, girls, is, right, you gotta get inside these characters' minds, right.
So, Lisa, you are determined that no one's gonna interrupt you.
And, Siobhan, you're determined that you're gonna get in at all costs.
Let's have another go.
Ready? And go.
- Am I bovvered, though? - But he really, really likes you.
- Yeah, but am I bovvered, though? - So what? You - What do you think? - They've got it now, miss.
- So, what, you just gonna - Does my face look bovvered? You should be a TV critic.
I love the telly.
Right, okay, girls.
That was really good, right.
But that was just a warm-up.
What we wanna do now is we wanna make up our own characters and get inside their minds.
So everybody get a different partner and then come and sit down.
I'll go with Dale, miss.
Dale, do you wanna have a go? Right.
You are a disgruntled customer who's just bought a new pair of boots and both the heels have fallen off on the same day.
You are the gentleman who sold her these boots and you do not give a monkeys.
All right.
Sit yourself down there and when you're ready And go.
I bought these from you yesterday and both the heels have fallen off 'em.
What you gonna do about it? Me? What am I gonna do? Yes, you.
The shop owner that sold them to me.
What you gonna do about it? Well, I didn't sell you your fat bum, though, did I, madam? And I think that's got more to do with the heel snapping than the quality of the shoes.
Brought the house down.
Might have a little Colin Farrell on our hands here.
Honestly, Dale, I think you've got a real talent.
And Miss Redpath doesn't say that very often.
It was a buzz.
Well, let's hope you enjoy French as much.
Mrs Hay Miss Haydock's class.
Yeah, you've always got on with her, haven't you? I've had detention off her before.
Well, make sure you don't get any more.
- Can I go to the loo, please, miss? - Eh, no.
You're gonna have to wait - till after break now.
- Miss, I'm bursting.
Umm, yeah, just be quick.
How's he been? Would you mind just going in and checking on him? I just don't wanna give him the opportunity to do a runner.
- Dale? - Sir? - It's Mr Treneman here.
You all right? - Fine.
You took your time.
Did you think I flushed myself down the loo? Frankly, yes.
You're all right, sir.
Come on.
You're late for your class.
It's very important, as we're the ones conducting the final interview, that we gather your thoughts on how you found our two candidates.
They were both dead good.
Mrs Woodham seems open to new ideas.
Mr Rimmer made us laugh.
Yeah, but he was a bit arrogant, wasn't he? Well, at least he was honest.
Look, I don't want a head that just tells us things because he thinks that's what we wanna hear.
You need a bit of leadership.
If I were to pin you down for a preference I think it's time for a bit of positive discrimination.
- Put a woman in charge.
- Well, I'd go with Mr Rimmer.
Can I have a bit of hush now everyone? I said quiet, please! Dale, sit down there next to Courtney.
Thought I had to sit on me own! Well, you've got a friend now, haven't you? Will you all turn to page 22? Move it! COURTNEY: Flamin' hell! Good.
He's got an ego the size of a football pitch.
And he's going out with Davina.
Nothing to do with it.
Rimmer had it coming.
It was too good an opportunity not to stick the boot in.
Why? What's Mr Rimmer ever done to you? He's not done anything to me.
just not a big fan.
Well, the other one might be just as egotistical.
Would you get the same kick out of demolishing her? Yes.
Probably would.
Don't like self-inflated people.
Grown up with one.
Spot 'em a mile off.
I can, too.
How would you say, ''Where is the station? I need to take the train''? Well, come on.
Ou est le gare Miss, how would you say, ''Where is the shower? ''I need to get a wash''? Oi! La bouche.
Ou-est la gas mask? Je suis tres sick.
(ALL LAUGHING) Right, smart aleck.
I would like you to read to the class the letter you wrote to your pen pal for homework.
(READING INCORRECTLY) Il est tres smelly.
(ALL LAUGHING) (BELL RINGING) The key to going forward with Waterloo Road is motivation, motivation, motivation.
A motivated staff body means a motivated student body.
You were doing really well then.
You've got loads of good things to say.
I could do without being at the mercy of technology.
Do you want me to come in and change the slides for you? What? Like my own personal Debbie McGee? No.
just like someone who knows how to work the thing.
You're nearly there now.
You'll be brilliant.
You know the job's yours.
I have told you I love you, haven't I? Well, I'm Only that you thought you did.
I'm happy you've made up your mind.
If you have.
Oh, yeah.
I tell you what.
If you get this job today, I'll make sure that there's a nice surprise waiting for you when you get home.
- What do you mean ''if''? - That's the spirit.
Sure you don't wanna go and get some fresh air? I like it in here.
You know you can tell me anything, don't you? Anything that's worrying you or is personal to you, it'll never go beyond these four walls.
English next, I think.
Maybe we'll get to do a play.
Any classifieds in there? Man with a van, storage? Give me a break, will you? No.
Good a time as any to sort your stuff out.
If you pay half the storage, I'll shift it.
Anything else you'd like me to do while I'm subbing your existence? I didn't mean it like that.
I just think it's a fair solution to the problem.
Well, don't think about what's fair, Tom, think about what's right.
If it's such a hassle, I'll come and help you put it away in the spare room.
- No.
You've helped enough, really.
- I'm happy to.
just get it shifted, Tom, or it's going in the bin.
I'm sorry if I'm making things worse between you, Tom.
Don't be daft.
She's behaving like a nutter.
It's so unlike Izzie to be petty about things.
She's just trying to force me to make it final, isn't she? And I'm not gonna do that, Lorna, 'cause that's not what I want, is it? Yeah, well, maybe it proves she doesn't either then really.
Miss? - Can I have a word? - Yeah, sure.
I'm just a bit confused with what's going on with you and Tom.
- Nothing's going on.
What do you mean? - You're always with him.
Yeah, I know.
I feel like that a bit myself at the moment.
Living in the same place, in each other's pockets at school.
- He doesn't have to live with you.
- Well, he hasn't got anywhere else.
I thought you were getting divorced from him.
Yeah, well, that was then.
Look, they're both so important to me.
I really hate to see them both so upset.
Yeah, well, maybe you should remember that when you spend all your time rubbing your relationship with Tom in Mum's face.
Mika? Trust me.
I've got their best interests at heart.
- Time to knock 'em dead, eh? - Good luck, Jack.
There's a spare seat over there, I think.
Well, he seems to be coming round.
He had a good session with Izzie in his drama, so - Fingers crossed, then? - Yeah.
See ya.
Can't sit here, miss.
He stinks.
It's against me human rights.
You will sit there until the end of the lesson and I don't want to hear another word out of you that isn't about To Kill A Mockingbird, do you understand? - Miss? - Yes.
Can I go to the toilet, please? No.
You can sit there and wait until the end of the lesson like everyone else.
So we have the opportunity with the backing of the board and the financial impetus of Mr Aspinall to take Waterloo Road and make it one of the best schools in the district.
My management style is about taking the school forward under my leadership, with my vision.
Thank you.
So you see yourself as a super-head? I don't like the term ''super-head'', but I do see myself as a school leader.
And what if the school leader leaves? The place can quickly crumble, can't it? Well, all businesses with chief executives have the element of the one-person show.
As you read the next chapter, I want you to note down any quotations you think tell us something about Atticus.
What are his qualities? What does he believe in? Choose carefully.
I don't want you just copying out of the text, please.
Look for key words.
- Dale Baxter, sit down! - Can't, miss.
Get back to your seat or I'm calling Mr Treneman! (TRICKLING) Ugh, miss, he's weeing himself! (ALL LAUGHING) Oh, that's just disgusting! I'm going to take you to Miss Campbell so you can get yourself cleaned up.
The rest of you, I want you to put away your things and file quietly to the classroom next door, it's empty.
Courtney, pass Dale his bag.
They're wet! Urgh! Pissy duds.
(LAUGHTER) Dale! Andrew, Dale Baxter's done a runner.
I hate you, Rimmer! Oi! What do you think you're doing? Calm down, calm down.
Now listen to me.
Listen, calm down.
Take it easy.
Take it easy.
I did everything you asked me to do.
What for? So's I look like a prat! Listen, you might think you hate me.
I'm sure lots of kids in this school hate me.
But we don't hate you, all right? We care about you.
Might sound daft, but we do.
Now, just calm down.
just calm down.
Listen to me.
It would've been very easy to forget you were even a pupil at this school, but Miss Campbell didn't, Mr Treneman didn't and neither did I.
Leave him with me, Jack.
Go on.
When you're ready, Jack.
I'd like to apologise for the incident that we've all just witnessed.
The young lad in question is being dealt with by our Head of Pastoral Care in conjunction with Social Services.
(BELL RINGING) Not a pin drop.
Time was it used to sound like a herd of wildebeest charging over the Serengeti when it came to the end of a lesson.
But it's not just about getting the kids to each lesson in an orderly fashion.
We have to motivate them.
Forget about education, education, education.
That will come.
What we need is motivation, motivation, motivation.
That must be the cornerstone of what we do at Waterloo Road.
Might we begin by letting you know exactly how this interview will be conducted? With the support of both the teaching and the non-teaching staff of Waterloo Road, I firmly believe that I have become someone worthy of the position of head teacher.
Thank you for that, Mr Rimmer.
Any questions? You've been in the job almost a year, Mr Rimmer.
- What's really changed? - Well, we've seen a few new initiatives.
We're looking at healthy school status here and the staff are behind me and the leadership team.
That might not sound like much, but you can't change much without the support of that lot.
Very comforting, I'm sure, but if staff predictions are right, less than 20%%% of Year Eleven pupils will leave this year with five or more good GCSEs.
How does a healthy eating initiative tackle that? We're doing our best, but it's a long, hard road.
I mean, 48%%% of the kids we see walk through that door in Year Seven have a reading age of eight or less and their numeracy skills are shocking.
If I had a magic wand What happened to ''motivation, motivation, motivation''? Sounds a bit like excuses, excuses, excuses.
Not excuses, Roger.
I'm just telling it like it is.
I know that we've got a long way to go, but I firmly believe we're making solid progress.
There's quite a lot of deadwood at Waterloo Road, wouldn't you agree? Yes.
I would like to bring in a bit of new blood.
But you can't swap youth for experience.
You've got to have both.
If you'd like to take a seat outside, we will be with you as soon as we've reached a decision.
Thank you.
Francine is gonna come and collect you.
She's going to bring you a change of clothes.
I don't want to stay here.
Everyone'll be laughing at me.
- They'd better not do.
- Well, you know they will and you can't stop 'em! Dale, just concentrate on your novel, eh? I just can't even begin to imagine how he must be feeling right now.
Not wonderful.
You have got a real knack of playing down the biggest thing, yet making a big massive song and dance about someone forgetting to put their tie on.
I recognise that description of myself.
KIM: This is going to be near impossible to manage, you know.
I think we might have to suggest transferring him to another school.
And admit defeat? He hates this school as it is.
Imagine how he's going to feel tomorrow when we force him to come back in again.
I had this printed out for Dale or whoever can make best use of it.
Overactive Bladder Syndrome.
I think it's perhaps what Dale may be suffering from.
- Over Never heard of it.
- Nor have I.
Lots of things can cause it, but it means that people who suffer from it can lose control of themselves almost spontaneously.
And here's you saying that ''school phobia'' doesn't exist.
I'd be scared to come to school if I had this.
If it is what he's got.
He could be making a nuisance of himself to make us exclude him.
He had a pair of wet pants hidden in his bag.
Is that what someone does who's making a nuisance of themselves? You're quite right.
You were wrong, admit it.
I was wrong.
- Sorry.
- Good.
Thank you for this, Lorna.
I think you might have cracked it.
I'm gonna go and give the school doctor a call.
This could stop Mrs Baxter being sent to prison.
Well done, you.
Where did you find it? Oh, I just came across it on a website I was looking at.
Really? What site? Oh, just a medical thing.
You know, the good thing is it can be cured.
- Are you okay? - Yes, yes, yes.
I'm fine.
You might want to invest in some self-defence classes if you are lucky enough to get this job.
Could you come back in, please? It's been a very close run thing, but we'd like to offer the job to you, Mrs Woodham.
Oh! Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Congratulations, Lyndsay.
- I'm sure the best person got the job.
- Thank you, Jack.
All right, well.
I'll leave you to it.
I'm sure you've got a lot to discuss.
Well, it seems Miss Campbell was right.
You do have Overactive Bladder Syndrome.
- So it's something proper, then? - It's very proper.
And it's not my fault? Young man, how long have you been putting up with this? I dunno.
Well, we don't know how it's caused, but we can treat it very easily.
You're joking me? They'll help to stop the bladder from contracting suddenly.
Drink lots of water.
No fizzy drinks.
You should see a difference very soon.
Here's to the new you, Dale.
It's not my fault.
All this time.
I just wish that you could have told us before.
You don't know what it's It's embarrassing.
We all have to go to the toilet, Dale.
You wouldn't hide a broken leg, would you? All this crap.
Well, you've got Miss Dickey to thank for all this.
Eh? Well, it was her that worked out what was wrong with you.
Don't ask me how, but she did.
I hear there's some good news.
Well, we will see you tomorrow, I hope.
They've given it to her.
- Well, that's crazy.
Why - God knows.
Suppose I'd better dust off the old history books, then, eh? Oh, Jack, come here.
That was nice.
Well? - I'm really sorry, Jack.
- You and me both.
Does anyone want an old Jack Rimmer sign? I've got no use for it now.
So this is where it all happens.
The board would like to see you again.
The board can go hang.
I've turned it down.
I just wanted the chance to say good luck.
- Are you serious? - Yeah.
These interviews are as much about the candidate seeing if they want the position as they are about them being the right person for the job and I think I might be better placed elsewhere.
You know, a bigger school maybe.
More of a challenge.
That little skirmish in the corridor put you off, didn't it? You know, it's not all about PowerPoint presentations and canap├ęs.
You need to be a good teacher first and foremost.
Thanks for the speech, Jack.
(PHONE RINGING) Hello? Roger.
I'll be down in a minute.
I'm not sure.
It's not easy being seen as second-best in the eyes of your Board of Governors.
I might step down anyway.
That would be foolish, Jack.
Waterloo Road needs you.
- Why not re-advertise? - ROGER: You know why.
It would take us another four or five months - until we found someone else.
- If ever.
Well You're in a spot of trouble, aren't you, gents, ladies? Would you like to be the first to shake my hand? - Eh? - I'm your new headmaster and if I ever get cheek like you gave me this morning again, I'll have you.
You got that, you little plonker? I will curtsy if it means that you've taken the job.
I think we should all go out for a very well-deserved pint.
I might even buy it for you.
Well done! Congratulations, Jack.
- Jack.
- Roger.
Would you like to join us for a drink? Thanks, but I've got a prior engagement.
Look, Jack, you might not have been our first choice, but there's no reason why we can't work together successfully.
Well, let's hope that things get a little easier now that my position is more stable.
Fortunately, my own position's looking a lot more stable, too.
So don't get too cocky, eh? (KNOCKING ON DOOR) Mum, I didn't mean to get you into trouble.
I just I didn't I didn't want to show myself up.
Okay, well, I'll be here in the morning at 8:30.
You won't need to bother.
We'll be fine on our own.
Won't we, son? Yeah, honest to God, I could have wept for him.
- You're all right, though, aren't you? - Yeah.
Can I have a gin and tonic, please? Call it storage fees.
Can you just lay off nagging me all the time? Don't you dare say I'm nagging you, Tom, or I'll swing for you.
You seem to be enjoying winding me up.
Look, please don't argue, Izzie.
You're working yourself up into a state again.
Yeah, too right, I am.
Well, can you go work it up somewhere else? - Fine.
I will.
- Hey! You deserved that, Tom.
Sorry, folks.
It's just a little domestic.
Look, I got a couple of bottles of Rochdale's finest to say thank you to you all for supporting me.
Assuming, of course, you were supporting me.
Anyway Take that.
- Cheers.
- ALL: Cheers! - Cheers.
- Congratulations.
You deserve it.
You're a damn sight better than a talking management book, I'll give you that.
That's the kind of support that made me take the job, Grantley.
And I've got another announcement to make, as I'm sure the rumour mill will have attested, Davina and I have moved in together and I'd rather like you all to have a drink at that.
ALL: Congratulations.
Excuse me, everyone.
I'm sorry, Jack, I don't mean to rain on your parade, but Well, I just wanted to let you all know, a while ago, I found out I had MS.
- Lorna, no.
- That's bad news, Lorna.
I am sorry.
That is so unfair.
Big hug? Oh, God, Lorna.
That's awful.
I've read quite a lot about it actually.
You hear about people ending up in wheelchairs Yes, please.
I don't want any sympathy.
I've just been trying to manage it on my own and, well, it's starting to become obvious.
I know some of you have been wondering what the hell's been wrong with me, so, well, now you know.
Please don't let me spoil the party.
- That must have been really difficult.
- You know what, Tom? I'm really glad it's out in the open.
I don't have to hide it any more.
Truth is, I was really trying to hide it from myself.

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