Xena: Warrior Princess s04e21 Episode Script

The Ides of March

I wanna die! Please! Please! I wanna die! Who's suffering now, Callisto? And you thought you were getting oblivion.
Well, this place makes Tartarus look like a day at the beach.
How long ya in for? Eternity? That's gotta smart.
Get over it! I'm doomed to be obsessed for eternity with a woman who despises me.
What a nightmare! No kidding.
You'd think after what I told him about you, that you would give me more respect.
Him? You mean "Him" He's come to trust me.
I have his ear from time to time.
I told him your desire.
You mean, he's gonna let me go back Well, he shares with you an interest in Xena.
She's someone he thought he had in his grasp but now he's not so sure.
You mean to tell me those stupid, maudlin missions she goes on are gonna end her up in Paradise? Probably not Paradise.
Most likely, she'll be born higher up the karmic ladder.
Right, she cooks my family, destroys my life and I end up in Hell while she gets another shot.
That's fair.
Gotta love the irony.
You tell him if he wants her here, I'm the woman for that job.
You must not harm her physically in any way.
Your victory must be a spiritual one.
She's found a road to redemption The way of the warrior.
You'll need to get her off that path.
And you have to agree to take care of one other thing for him.
Yes? What's that? You know the man they call Caesar? That Xena can really mess up a dream, can't she? Who are you? How do you know about my dreams? I know everything about your life, Caesar.
What it's been and what it can be.
I'm here to help you get everything you've ever desired.
It's through me you finally fulfill your destiny.
I can give you ultimate power and free you from your greatest torment.
Xena Yes Xena.
I can't tell you how much we have in common in that way.
Let me guess This Eli guy, he's the one that taught you all this "love your enemy" stuff? That's right.
Xena, why do we have to go see a preacher? When there are battles to fight, butts to kick? 'Cause whatever Gabrielle wants, Gabrielle gets.
Excuse me.
When's the next ship for Athens? What'd you do that for? I had him.
Right.
What do you want with me? Caesar's reward.
Six million dinars.
-Six million dinars? -That's quite a temptation Not for me, for every killer in Europe.
So, it's come to this.
Caesar wants me out of the way so bad he's willing to deplete his fortune to do it.
I think it's time I put an end to this feud between Caesar and me.
You're not gonna try to make peace with that slime, are you? No.
I'm going to kill him.
In the time of ancient gods, warlords and kings a land in turmoil cried out for a hero.
She was Xena.
A mighty princess forged in the heat of battle.
The power The passion The danger Her courage will change the world.
XENA, THE WARRIOR PRINCESS Xena Xena, you can't just walk into Rome and kill Caesar.
It's an opportunity to kill a lot of romans.
I say we do it.
We're not doing anything.
I'm going to Rome, not you.
Gabrielle, I can't take you, not after that vision.
What vision? I had a vision once that Gabrielle and I would die at the hands of romans.
It's bad enough that we can run into romans anywhere -but if you and I were to go to Rome -Ok.
Well, what if I ask you not to do this? Gabrielle, he's an evil man, and he's trying to kill me.
I have to take him out or die trying.
It's the way of the warrior.
Was I in this vision? -No.
-Then I should go with you.
Amarice, you're staying here with Gabrielle.
As her bodyguard? As her friend.
You could learn something if you listened to her once in a while.
You promise you won't follow me? I promise.
Xena Be careful.
There's Xena's head.
Kill him.
-Move it! -Take "Xena" with you.
Please, no! I did as you said.
So far, I've had eight impostors try to claim the reward.
Xena will defeat any mercen'ry who attacks her.
Of course.
The reward was just to get her attention.
She will come to you.
You need to be ready.
Yes.
Well, I've made plans for that, of course.
Really? Well I suggest you just have one more card to play.
It's him.
It's Eli.
Your heart is pure, Mazin.
Abba Make Mazin's body as whole as his spirit.
Rise, Mazin.
It's done.
You're healed.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
Now, go.
Good luck.
Go.
Go.
Gabrielle Eli I'm so happy to see you I heard you were teaching in Greece.
I set out to find you.
Where's Xena? She has some work to do.
This is my friend, Amarice.
Hello, Amarice.
If somebody threatened your mother, would you fight to defend her? Amarice and I have some philosophical differences.
I see.
We've got a lot to talk about.
Come on.
Can you teach me to heal? All I can do is try and teach you how to love.
But if you love with all your heart and soul If you become love itself then you can heal.
Why is love the key? Selfless, pure love, is the only expression of divine perfection we have in this world.
It's the greatest power one can possess.
Oh, come on The only real power's at the end of a sword.
Did you hear that? What? Boots.
And if the other side has more swords? If you can love your way out of this one, be my guest.
-Brutus -Hello, Gabrielle.
You're doing Caesar's bidding again? Caesar believes Xena is trying to kill him.
He has to protect himself.
With me.
I understand.
Let these people go.
My orders are to arrest you, Eli and his followers.
You'll be taken as hostages against Xena killing Caesar.
Caesar's promised me no one will be hurt.
And you believe him Our friends are at war, Gabrielle.
I'm sorry this brings us into conflict, but it's inevitable.
Of course it is.
Move.
Let's go! Come on.
-Who the? -At ease.
Let's make this short and sweet.
Brings back memories, doesn't it, Xena? Guards! -This way! -Look behind every! My, that was a shocker now, wasn't it? Don't bother.
You've already done all the damage you can to me.
Thanks, by the way.
For what? I wanted to cease existing and you did your best to help.
But as you can see, it didn't take.
They wouldn't let me off the hook that easy.
Who's "they"? I don't know.
Whoever it is that does the final judging.
They sent me to a place that makes Tartarus look like the Elysian Fields.
They call it Hell.
Couldn't have happened to a nicer gal.
The one who runs things down, where I come from, he's very interested in what happens in this life.
He figures Caesar will be very valuable to him.
And, of course, he also figures you might be an obstacle.
Then he figures right.
And I won't be the only one.
Plenty of people will oppose Caesar becoming emperor.
Ah, you know about the emperor thing The laurel wreath kind 'a gave it away.
I'm guessing that he'll anounce it when the Senate reconvenes on the Ides of March.
My, aren't you the clever girl? Yes, some people will be unhappy but everybody has their price.
Even the honorable Brutus.
Caesar's gonna give him Gaul and that should keep him smiling.
But it's you, my darling It's you that I'm worried about.
I'm here to make you an offer.
Forget it.
-Afraid you'll be tempted? -Yeah, that's right.
I'll give you a little hint.
Gabrielle's in roman hands as we speak.
-You lie.
-Do I? My lord gave me a thorough briefing as to what's happened to you and Gabrielle since the last time we met.
I know everything about India and Eli.
So you're not the only clever girl now, Xena, are you? Gabrielle's on her way to a roman prison in the Appenines as we speak.
So About my offer Get lost.
Oh, but I'm not going anywhere, Xena.
Come on! Move it! Move it! Go! Keep moving! Jailer, these prisoners are to be held here.
Yes, we've been waiting for them.
Those crosses Who are they for? We're expecting a boatload of pirates any day.
No! Don't harm Gabrielle! Of course not! I'm still useful to you, Brutus! Get up.
Not until you pardon her for what she just did.
She attacked one of my men.
And I remember a time when mercy was shown to you! Put down your swords.
Chain her to the prop.
Oh, please Can't you just break my legs? Come on, you.
Move it! Get in there.
Nice move.
You know, if I had a little backup maybe I could have pulled it off.
You don't really think those crosses are for a boatload of pirates, do you? Caesar's never lied to me.
There's a first time for everything.
Hello, Brutus.
I have a deal for you.
You tell me where my friend, Gabrielle, is, and I will give you some information that will save your stinkin' life.
Deal? Tell you what You promise to tell me and I will go first.
Do I have you your word? And you trust me? Everyone says that Brutus is an honorable man.
Do I have your word? Yeah.
Beware the Ides of March, Brutus.
Why the Ides of March? Because on that day, Caesar will declare himself emperor.
I don't believe you.
Why would he do that? Greed Lust for power An ego the size of the Aegean.
Of course, he plans to rid himself of anyone who would stand in his way.
What are you saying? He's too smart to kill you in Rome.
You have much too much support there.
But I have firsthand knowledge that he's been talking to assassins in Gaul.
So Your turn.
Come on, Brutus.
Gabrielle saved your life once.
Give me a chance to save hers.
I put her in a prison compound at the foot of Mt.
Amaro.
I don't believe what you said about Caesar.
It's your funeral.
Brutus Was it snowing on Mt.
Amaro? Yes, it was snowing when I left.
I did it.
Did what? You two are sitting there like a couple of bumps on a log.
-What could you have done? -She did nothing.
That's right, I did nothing.
We're gonna be nailed to crosses tomorrow morning and you two are bragging about doing nothing? You don't understand, Amarice.
In order to become a perfect vessel for love one has to cease all activity.
Not only physical, but mental as well.
It's only when you've reached that state of emptiness that you're ready, at last, to be filled with love.
Just in time, too.
You'll be able to love the people who crucify us I just keep coming back.
In that way, I'm more dependable than your chakram.
My lord sees everything, Xena, and you don't have to go through with this.
I can arrange it for you and Gabrielle and all her peaceful little friends to just walk out of here and no one gets hurt.
And you and Gabrielle can live happily ever after.
What's the catch? Well, there is one little thing.
You have to drop your sword and join Gabrielle in fulfilling a life of loving kindness.
I'm still not interested.
That's because you haven't heard it all, yet.
I'm offering you complete serenity.
Go on.
There's a reason you can't allow you and your partner peace.
It's your guilt.
It motivates everything you do.
Torments you.
Invite me into your soul and I can purge you of that guilt.
I can cleanse you of that shame that drives you.
I can give you peace if you let me.
What's it gonna be, Xena? Serenity and happiness? Or another ride in that wagon with your friend Gabrielle? Think of your vision.
You're trying to tempt me from my way by offering me peace.
In a nutshell.
That guilt you're depending on I put it all behind me.
You see, I know now what I have to do.
I have to be the best warrior I can be.
To redeem myself, I have to fight evil with a sword and that's what I'm gonna do, no matter what the consequences.
Damn! Brutus Welcome.
You deposited our little friend in a safe place, I trust? -Yes.
-Perfect.
Caesar They were building crosses when I was there.
Of course.
You can't have a crucifixion without crosses, Brutus.
You're crucifying Gabrielle All of them.
But you told me she would be safe.
You were only going to use her as a distraction.
Well, what would distract Xena more than her best friend's execution? Tomorrow, on the Ides of March The very day I need Xena most distracted.
What happens on the Ides of March? I'm going to make an announcement, Brutus.
An announcement that will change history.
How are the troops looking up there? -Excellent.
-Good Because in a few days, I want you to take command of one of those legions.
The thirteenth, if you like.
-March 'em into Gaul.
-Why Gaul? I can't tell you that right now, Brutus, but, trust me.
Marc Antony! How are you? I always thought I'd die in battle, not hung on a cross.
Do you think Xena will make it in time? She'll be here.
All right, let's keep it simple.
I keep the vision from coming true and you leave Caesar alone.
Ok, Xena.
You had your chance.
-It's Xena! -Find her! Xena I'm so glad to see you! Listen That vision is not going to happen, all right? Here.
Take this.
Come on, Eli.
Get up! All right, let's go! -They're trying to escape! -Get them! -Go ahead! Run! -This way! -Run! Move! -We need more men! Go! Go! No.
Run for the woods! Go! No.
Go! Let's go! No! Get up! I can't, Gabrielle.
It's my spine I can't move.
Interesting.
No, Gabrielle, no! Gabrielle Xena You're crying? Don't cry.
I won't.
Rest.
It won't be long, now.
Rome is under threat.
I have conclusive proof that Caesar is responsible.
Friends! Caesar -Hail, Caesar.
-Most welcome.
He thinks he's a god.
I made you leave the way of love.
-It was my fault.
-I had a choice.
To do nothing or save my friend.
I chose the way of friendship.
I'm sorry for all the times I didn't treat you right.
Xena You've brought out the best in me.
Before I met you, no one saw me for who I was.
I felt invisible.
But you saw all the things that I could be.
You saved me, Xena.
I wish What? that I had 'a read your scrolls just once.
You would have liked them.
I know.
It's time! On your feet! What's the matter, Brutus? -Do you have anything to tell me? -Tell you? -What do you mean? -About this announcement you're going to make today.
Oh, that.
Yes, well, at first, you probably won't like it, but I plan to persuade you.
Are you ready for your trip to Gaul? -I'll be ready.
-Good.
Don't give me that confident look.
You're about to die like a slave and drag your friend with you and it's all right by me.
Your lord might not feel the same way.
He sent you on a mission, didn't he? Making Caesar dictator was his main concern.
And once he's ruling making him an agent of my lord will be easy.
So while you lie here helpless he's declaring himself emperor.
Good senators! True patriots of Rome! Your attention, please! I have an important announcement to make! To quell civil unrest I have decided to make an important change to our government.
Gabrielle You were the best thing in my life.
I love you, Xena.
And I must supply the leadership so desperately needed.
On this day the 15th of March I declare myself And you, Brutus? Gabrielle Gabrielle
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