Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man (2025) s01e01 Episode Script

1
-[siren blaring]
-[horns honking]
-[May] Hey, Peter
-[knocks on door]
you were supposed to be
up 15 minutes ago.
-[grunts]
-[phone vibrating]
[yawns] Sorry, May. I'm up.
-[May] Get a move on or you'll be late.
-[phone vibrating]
Oh, crap! I'm late! I'm late! [groans]
[upbeat music playing]
[sniffs] Ugh!
[groans]
[panting]
[May] Peter! Peter, wait!
Your oatmeal was getting cold
so I packed it to go.
[grunts] Thank you, May, you're the best!
[Peter grunts]
-The best.
-Oh.
-[groans] Seriously?
-[Peter] Excuse me! Oops!
-Hey! Watch it!
-Sorry! Pardon me!
-Whoa!
-Oh! Pardon me! Didn't mean to do that!
[automated voice]
Stand clear of the doors.
[Peter] Hey, stop!
I'm almost there! Don't go yet.
And they went. [sighs]
'Course.
Why would anything
work out for you, Peter?
[dramatic music playing]
[music fades]
-Ugh.
-[car honks]
[May] Hey, Peter, you need a ride?
May? What are you doing,
you're gonna be late for work.
It's your first day.
If one of us is gonna be late,
I'd rather it's me.
[soft pop music on speakers,
Pony Pony Run Run "What I Feel"]
[May] So, high school orientation.
-How excited are you?
-Honestly?
I'm still waiting for them to tell me
they sent the approval letter
to the wrong Peter Parker. [chuckles]
But, I've wanted to go
to Midtown for years,
their robotics program is supposed to be
one of the best in the country.
Ah. And here I thought
you were excited about learning.
Turns out, you just want to play
with robots all day.
[laughs] Well, to answer your question,
I'm excited.
And it'll be nice,
you know, to have something to distract
from everything else that's been goin' on.
[lively chatter]
May, I [sighs]
I just wanna say thank you.
Things have been
different without having Uncle Ben around,
but you've always been here for me.
You have always had my back,
and I really appreciate that,
more than I can say. I
I feel very lucky to have you in my life.
[chuckles]
I feel exactly the same about you, kid.
-Oh.
-[chuckles]
Okay, let me help you with that.
Oh. So, that's how it works.
[both chuckle]
See, that's why you're going
to the fancy Robot School.
-Thanks again for the ride, May.
-Of course, Peter.
[sighs] Okay. All right, Peter,
this is the first day
of the rest of your life.
No need to be nervous,
it's just orientation
at a high school for
[clears throat] geniuses.
-[lively chatter]
-[birds chirping]
How bad could this possibly go?
-[loud whooshing]
-[gasps]
-[girl gasps]
-[boy] Huh?
What the hell?
-[loud thud]
-[crowd exclaims]
[roars]
[growling]
-Peter, let's go!
-[gasps]
[roaring]
[crowd screaming]
[boy yelps and gasps]
-[boy whimpers]
-[snarling]
[Doctor Strange theme playing]
[Doctor Strange grunts]
[straining]
Where do you think you're going?
Oh, my gosh, it's
some kinda magical wizard guy?
[school bell rings]
-Wait, where are we?
-[tense music playing]
Oh, no. We're not supposed to be here.
-[Doctor Strange grunts]
-[roaring]
[Doctor Strange grunts]
[roaring]
[snarling]
-[girl] Oh, my God! No!
-[boy] No! This isn't fair!
-[tense music continuing]
-[Doctor Strange groans]
[girl screams]
[Doctor Strange] Good luck getting through
the impenetrable Shield of Seraphim.
[grunts] Okay,
never using this spell again.
[electrical buzzing]
[boy groans, whimpering]
Grab that kid.
[yelling]
[gasps]
[crowd exclaiming]
-You okay, kid?
-[boy] Mm-hmm.
Do a sweep, make sure that's everyone.
[tense music continuing]
You gotta be kidding me.
Not so fast.
[creature snarling]
[groans] No!
Ouch.
[snarling]
-[grunts]
-[boy 1] Look out.
-[boy 2] Run!
-Come on, let's go!
-[yelps]
-[roaring]
-[tense music continuing]
-[snarling]
-[steps thudding]
-[groans]
-[creature growls]
-[gasps]
[snarling]
[gasping]
-Peter!
-[yelps]
-[snarls]
-[Peter] Hey, ugly!
[gasps, groans]
I don't think she's interested, buddy!
[tense music continuing]
-[roaring]
-[chuckles nervously]
I was gonna say,
"Pick on someone your own size",
but you're actually [gulps]
a lot bigger up close.
-[roaring loudly]
-[yelps]
[heroic music playing]
Good save, kid.
[creature snarling]
[Peter] Are you okay?
-[crowd chattering]
-[siren wailing]
[suspenseful music playing]
Oh, uh Thanks. Yeah.
I I've been better,
but I definitely could've been worse.
Midtown on the other hand
Yeah, I was here for orientation.
Freshman, huh? Same.
But I have a feeling we won't be getting
assigned classes anytime soon.
[Peter] Yeah, I think you're right.
So, you got a name, hero?
Oh, yeah. Uh, sorry. I'm Peter Parker.
How about you?
Nice to meet you, Pete. I'm Nico Minoru.
[groans loudly]
-[groaning]
-Okay, rude. I didn't name myself.
[breathing heavily] No, I
Something bit
[softly] What?
-Whoa! Oh, my gosh! Hey.
-[girl] Whoa! What's up with him?
-[exclaims] Peter?
-Pete? Pete, are you okay, man?
What happened to him?
I I don't know. He didn't like my name?
[May] Hey, Peter?
-[sighs]
-[May echoing] Peter, talk to me.
-["Neighbor Like Me" playing]
-[chorus] Hey there ♪
There goes the Spider-Man ♪
Spider-Man ♪
Does whatever a spider can ♪
Spider-Man ♪
Spider-Man
Spider-Man ♪
-There goes the Spider-Man ♪
-[Relaye] Yeah! Eh! ♪
There we go
There we go ♪
There we go again ♪
Swinging through the city so fast
You can barely notice him ♪
Wall crawler ♪
You know what's after that ♪
Friendly neighborhood
He's taking care of the habitat ♪
Urban acrobat ♪
Don't know where he find the time
Fighting crime ♪
Humble beginnings
And now we flyin' high ♪
Spi-Spidey sense
Superpower science kid ♪
You don't think it's fair
I got the world's smallest violin ♪
At the pinnacle
Perched at the top ♪
It's daily and it never stops ♪
[chorus] Hey there ♪
[Relaye] Need my city,
my city it need me ♪
A hero not a vigilante ♪
[chorus] There goes the Spider-Man ♪
[Relaye] Taking off the mask
I know what you see ♪
[chorus] Look out ♪
[Relaye] Know you want
a neighbor like me ♪
Cleaning up Queens, NYC ♪
And I do it even better with a team ♪
[chorus] Here comes the Spider-Man ♪
[May] Peter! You were supposed to be up
20 minutes ago!
-You're gonna be late!
-[yawns] Sorry, May! I'm up.
I'm up!
[adventurous music playing]
[exclaims]
[chuckles]
-[man] Where you goin'?
-[Peter] Right behind ya!
-And pardon me!
-[woman 1] Yo!
-Excuse me! I'm gonna make it on time!
-[woman 2] Hey!
-Nice job, Peter [groans]
-[man 1] Watch where you're goin'!
-[man 2] Hey, watch it!
-I'm okay.
-[man 3] Welcome to New York, kid.
-Sorry about your cab.
[automated voice]
Stand clear of the doors.
[Peter] Hey! Stop! Don't go yet! Stop!
Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Aw.
And, of course.
All right, well, plan B.
[heroic music playing]
[music swells]
[Peter sighs] I was hopin' to avoid
getting too sweaty before school,
but it's better than bein' late.
Okay, here we go.
[upbeat pop music playing,
Outasight "Say Hey"]
Whoo!
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
[Peter exclaims, yelps]
[sighs] No! I'm good.
I'm all right, I'm all right.
[boy] Whoa!
[gasps] Hey, Mom!
[Peter] Okay,
we're making pretty good time.
I might actually
be a little early for once.
-[man] Help!
-[Peter] Or not.
Somebody help me!
It's no use calling for help.
Just give us the cash now
and we'll only rough you up a little bit.
-[man gasping]
-[mugger 1] He's running, grab him!
[man yelps] Help! [groans]
[exclaims]
[exclaims]
[tires screeching]
[Peter] Gotcha! [chuckles]
Hey, man, are are you good?
-Are you okay?
-Holy crap!
You saved my life!
I thought I was dead meat.
[mugger 1] You are.
This freak just bought you
a couple more seconds.
-Stevie, get this clown on live.
-[Stevie] Already on it.
Yo, yo, yo, fam, Stevie Sherman here.
Streaming live from Queens.
Check out our next victim
in his dumbass costume.
-[Peter] Is my suit that bad?
-[Stevie] You should subscribe!
-Eh.
-[Peter] Ouch!
Hey, you know what? That was unnecessary.
-Words hurt, you know.
-[scoffs] Not as much as bricks do!
-[mugger 2 grunting]
-[exclaiming]
[groans]
-[mugger 2 groaning]
-[all exclaiming]
Oh, man, the chat is blowing up right now.
-Can you do that again?
-Stop recording, moron!
Let's see how funny you are
with a concussion!
[Peter] Whoa. [chuckles]
-[mugger 1 grunts]
-Missed me.
[mugger 1 yelling]
-[Peter] Almost!
-Stop jumping around!
[Peter] Careful,
you almost hit me with that.
Watch out for that ladder.
[groans]
[gasping]
[groans]
[phone pinging]
[Peter] Oh. Hey, guys.
It's Spider-Man here.
When the police get here,
could you tell them the webbing
should wear off in an hour or so?
Don't forget to not like and subscribe.
Thanks!
[man] Man, you saved me twice.
First my life, then my face.
-[grunts]
-Thank you, dude.
Oh yeah, totally. Anytime.
Well, I mean,
don't make a habit of playing in traff
-You know what I mean.
-How can I thank you?
I mean, like, I tried to tell those guys,
I don't really carry cash
but, I mean, do you have Venmo?
Hey, don't worry about it, uh, citizen?
[chuckles] Uh It's Harry.
Well, don't worry about it, Harry.
Just consider it a good deed from
your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man.
That's me, by the way,
I am, I'm Spider-Man. Uh Uh
I'm also late! I gotta go! See ya!
[stammers] Okay! Thanks again, Spider-Man!
[school bell rings]
Following our discussions yesterday,
we'll be turning our attention
towards solving rational inequalities
-such as these.
-[panting]
And before you even consider
raising your hand to ask me,
yes, these will be on the test on Friday,
and no, you may not be excused
-from said test.
-[sighs]
-Ah! Nice of you to join us
-[gasps]
-Mr. Parker. See me after class.
-[students chuckle]
[sighs] Yes, ma'am.
-I can't believe you were late again.
-Whoa! Jeez!
Keep this up and you might actually
get an award for imperfect attendance.
Yeah, well, you know,
it would be nice to finally win
a non-science related trophy
that doesn't just say "participant".
-[groans]
-Hey, watch where you're going, kid!
-Hey, hey, hey, Emma
-[gasps]
-it's fine. Honestly. [chuckles]
-[romantic music playing]
[stammering] Oh, I'm sorry, Pearl,
[laughs] I didn't see you there.
It's not a big deal at all.
Petey's always been a bit clumsy.
You know me, clumsy, Petey Parky
uh, Parker. [chuckles]
-Oh. Hey, Nico.
-Hey, what's up, Pearl?
[groans]
So, Petey. That's something, right?
If by something
you mean extremely embarrassing?
-Yes.
-Oh, great, 'cause I totally did.
Embarrassed by your childhood crush
and it's not even lunch yet?
Something tells me
this is going to be a fun day for you.
Pearl's not just my "childhood crush",
we have a history.
She used to live in my building,
so when my Aunt and Uncle would go out,
they'd ask Pearl to come over.
You know, hang out, make sure I ate dinner
and didn't stay up too late.
Pete, was she your babysitter?
No! I was, you know, like,
11 and a half, and she was 14.
We were just, hangin' out.
-Did they pay her?
-Yes, they paid her.
[chuckles] I knew it.
It's okay, Pete.
I've read that lots of boys
develop feelings for their babysitters.
I won't judge you too much.
[sighs] The point is,
Pearl still thinks of me as a kid.
She's never gonna want to date me
if she still looks at me
as "Little Petey Parker"
from down the hall.
Don't count yourself out, Pete.
Crazier things have happened.
I mean, I once knew a guy
that still had a babysitter at 12.
I was 11 and a half.
Well, regardless of that,
Pearl's never gonna know that you feel
that way about her unless you tell her.
You should ask her out.
I mean, a girl like Pearl
isn't gonna be on the market forever.
Yeah, you know you're right.
I sh I should ask her.
I mean, what do I have to lose, right?
I'm gonna do it right now.
Or maybe after school?
-End of the week?
-I'd do it soon.
Who knows who else is thinking
about asking her out?
Ha-ha. Very funny.
You are joking, right, Nico?
Nico! [sighs] Nico!
[school bell rings]
[Mr. Campbell]
But this is actually untrue.
Although it's become
a cultural reference when discussing him,
it's been proven that Mr. Paul Revere
never actually yelled
-"The British are coming."
-[siren wailing]
What is coming, however, is a test on
Uh, Mr. Campbell. I'm sorry.
May I please be excused?
I need to run to the restroom.
-[siren wailing]
-[tires screech]
[tense music playing]
-[tires screech]
-[siren wailing]
[Peter] Whoa! Whoa!
[clicks]
[horn honking]
Gun it!
[horns honking]
-[tires screeching]
-[siren wailing]
[Peter grunts]
Whoa!
[horns honking]
Whoa!
[thuds]
Sorry about that!
Come on!
-[cars honking]
-[Peter grunts]
Come on, Spidey. You got this.
Steady. Wait for it.
Now!
Gotcha!
-[groans]
-[horn honks]
[Peter] Somebody get
that license plate number!
Oh.
Oh, man. Wake up!
-[horn honking]
-[tires screeching]
You got to wake up!
[tense music continuing]
[Peter] Okay, watch out!
There's a bus up there!
Oh, God!
-[Peter] I hope this works!
-[man yelps]
-[grunting]
-[people exclaim]
[creaking]
[grunts]
[straining]
[grunts]
-Uh It was him.
-[Peter] Holy crap! I just
I I can't believe that worked.
-[crowd chattering]
-[Peter] Oh.
-[people exclaiming]
-[Peter] Okay. [chuckles]
-[siren wailing]
-[triumphant music playing]
[cameras clicking]
[Peter] All in a day's work.
Uh, thanks for the love, everyone,
but I gotta take off.
Stay safe, New York. Uh, peace!
Okay, Parker!
If you can stop a truck,
you can ask out the girl of your dreams!
[coach] Come on, everybody,
let's switch sides.
-Let's do it. All right. Everyone!
-[cheerleader] We are the Ravens!
-The mighty, mighty Ravens!
-[coach] Go, Ravens!
-[sighs] Okay. It's now or never.
-[suspenseful music playing]
[groans] Nico, come on!
I'd finally worked up the nerve
Yeah, about that.
Sorry, Pete, someone beat you to it.
-[Pearl chuckles]
-[sighs]
-[cheerleader] Let's go, go, Ravens, go!
-[gasps]
[stammering] What? No. But I
I was just I was ready
That happened so fast.
I know, Pete.
Trust me, I was really hoping
it was going to be one of us.
[sighs]
Ugh. I still can't believe Pearl
is dating Lonnie Lincoln.
Really? Because you've been
complaining about it for a week.
I just, I don't get it.
Besides being
the captain of the football team,
-what does he have that I don't?
-[laughter]
Uh, let's see.
He's got muscles. Popularity.
Pearl, since he asked her out
-and you didn't.
-[grumbles]
[Nico] Okay, still too soon to joke.
[Mr. Taylor] Good afternoon, class.
Today, we're gonna be splittin' into pairs
for some upcoming projects.
Normally, I would assign you partners,
but since this will be
for the foreseeable future,
I'll allow you to pair up as you see fit.
[gasps] Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
Yep. Let's team up
and you can do most of the work.
Close. I was thinking
that this is my chance
to ask Pearl to be my lab partner.
If Pearl says yes,
I'll be able to show her that I'm not just
some kid. She'll totally
[Lonnie] Yo, Mr. Taylor,
can I work with Peter?
What?
Oh, yeah, sure. Lincoln and Parker.
[chuckles nervously]
What the heck was that?
Maybe he also wants
you to do all the work.
-Smart guy.
-[sighs] Great.
Now I get to carry the workload
for Pearl's boyfriend. Hmph!
Okay. So first things first,
we'll need an understanding
of stoichiometric compounds Oh.
[chuckles] Right, sorry.
Stoichiometric compounds
-are those that maintain
-The ratio in which they were formed,
-despite having defects.
-Oh.
[chuckles] I know that look. That's the,
"I didn't think the star quarterback
"would have a knack for science" look.
Yeah, no.
Sorry, I really
shouldn't have assumed that.
Nah, you're good, man.
I completely get it.
People think I'm destined
to go pro or something,
but I'd rather have options.
Playing for Bales High
is a hell of an opportunity,
and while I'm here,
I'm gonna learn as much as I can.
That's actually why
I wanted to partner up with you.
Hold on, what? Why?
-[Lonnie] Pearl said you're a smart dude.
-She I mean, she, she said that?
Yeah, she mentioned you guys go back.
Always talks about how clever you are so,
I wanted to see for myself.
So, smart guy.
-You ready to get to work?
-[chuckles] You know it.
[school bell rings]
[Peter] You know, Lonnie's pretty cool.
He's really smart, he's funny,
and he seems like a nice guy.
We were talking and I found out
we actually listen to the same bands.
-Uh, what are you doing?
-Oh, yeah.
Just adding those
to that list from earlier.
[both chuckle]
-Bye, Nico!
-Bye, Pete!
[gasps]
All right, get home safe.
Text me when you make it.
You got it. Have a good practice.
And don't forget your goggles.
[gasps, sighs]
Yo, Peter!
Oh. Hey. Seein' you everywhere lately.
Yeah, no football practice today
so I'm heading home
a bit earlier than usual.
Cool. Cool.
Big plans or you just gonna chill-lax?
Chill-lax.
Probably do a few small things
around the house.
You know how it is.
Yeah, well, I don't wanna hold you up.
I should actually get going
before I miss my train again.
Cool. Have a good one, dude.
Yeah, thanks, you too.
[solemn music playing]
[sighs]
Come on.
[solemn music continuing]
[woman] It's been four days
and you still ain't paid me back.
[man] Hey, girl,
I never even play with you like that,
-you gotta calm down.
-[siren chirps]
[indistinct police radio chatter]
[siren blaring in distance]
-[glass shatters]
-[dog barking]
[men panting, laughing]
[reporter on TV] At eleven,
a string of vandalism
[Lonnie] Hey, everyone, I'm home.
-Hey, son. How was your day?
-[Lonnie] Great, no complaints.
Hey, Lonnie, mind lookin'
at your brother's homework with him?
-[whines]
-Of course. Grab your books, Andre.
Let's get started
after I take the trash out.
[stammers] Hey!
Oh, Mom, uh, I asked the shop teacher
about your car.
He said it might be your alternator.
I'll check it out after this.
Maybe we can avoid takin' it in
and save some money.
[chuckles] That would be a blessing.
Thank you, Lonnie.
[man on TV] Hey, hey,
what you do with that thing? Come on.
[emotional music playing]
[Peter and thief grunt]
[man] That's what I'm talkin' about now?
[Peter] Hi,
I believe this money belongs to you.
Thank you. I just turned around
for one second, and
Yeah, about that
[thief crying] I'm sorry.
I lost my job recently.
When I saw the money I just
I don't know.
Something came over me. I
I I'm so sorry.
[Peter] Mister pizza guy, sir.
Uh, I mean, it's ultimately up to you,
but she was just down on her luck.
I don't know,
maybe let her go just this once?
[woman crying] I'm so sorry.
[sighs] Yeah, okay, fine.
[Peter grunting]
Hey, it's okay. It's okay.
You made a mistake.
Just, please don't make me regret this.
I won't.
I promise.
[Peter] I'm sorry about that. I just
You know, she just made a bad choice.
Yeah, I don't know for sure,
but what I do know
is you got our money back.
Thanks for your help, Spider-guy!
It's actually, Spider-Man.
Uh-huh. Sure, sure, whatever.
-Hey, how about a couple of slices
-Hey. [moans]
on the house for the Spider-Man.
[Peter] There's actually no "the",
it's just Spider
Wait. Did you say free pizza?
Thanks.
[triumphant music playing]
Mm.
[gasps] Oh, my gosh!
Somebody just threw this out?
It's It's, like, new!
Wow. Free pizza, free DVD player.
It's the best day ever!
[upbeat rock music on earphones,
alt-J "Left Hand Free"]
Oh.
[camera clicks]
[upbeat rock music continuing,
alt-J "Left Hand Free"]
[keys clink]
-[Peter] Hey, May.
-[May] Mm! Peter, hey!
-How was school today?
-[Peter] Uh, it was okay.
I found a DVD player on the way home.
Oh, and there's this crazy car
parked outside.
I
What What are you doing here?
Sorry, I mean, I'm Peter.
Hello, Peter, it's nice to meet you.
My name is Norman Osborn.
[song fades]
[closing theme music playing]