Out With Dad (2010) s04e13 Episode Script
Counselling Vanessa – Session Forty-Eight
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All I could think about was how cold I was.
And I I just needed someone.
But I felt like there was no one.
And then I Oh, I'm so stupid! I don't know why I didn't go there before I went to Matthew's.
I didn't even know if he still lived there and um He hugged me.
And he didn't judge me.
And then he made me hot chocolate, just like our grandma used to.
And uh And then, I came here.
And and you know everything else.
Oh Vanessa.
It sounds like you survived something just horrible.
And I can't imagine just how hard it was for you to tell me just now.
It was very brave.
I'm sorry it took me so long to finally tell you.
There is no need to be sorry.
You had to wait to be ready.
A year ago, we were complete strangers.
Yet, it seems easier.
Yes, that can be true.
Um Last week, you asked me why I wasn't sleeping well and I think it's because of all of this.
I hadn't been thinking about it for a long time.
I actually got good at finally forgetting everything, but uh then it just Just so you know, that's totally normal.
OK? Anniversaries, they they can be a big deal.
They can really dredge up these memory sometimes, OK? - No kidding.
- Yeah.
When you have these memories these nightmares, what parts stand out for you? The smells.
I can smell old beer cans.
And smoke But not like cigarette smoke, or pot, it's It's chalky.
Maybe some kind of other drug? And old basement.
And falling.
When he pulled me from the couch, I think about that a lot.
Yeah, I bet Those are really vivid, really scary memories.
Yeah Do you notice anything particular that triggers them, for you? Lots of things Whenever I walk downstairs, I feel like he's gonna be at the bottom.
Uh Lots of other stuff but I can't think of anything.
That's OK.
- We've talked about a lot of really tough stuff today.
- Yeah.
So Do you mind if I give you a bit of homework actually? - OK.
- Just, you know, this will help us to figure out more about these memories.
OK? And why they are being triggered.
So, the next time you have one of these moments when you feel like you're being transported back, if you could just write it down Do you mind doing that? - OK.
- OK.
Just make sure you keep a notebook or something like that nearby, at all times.
- Hmm is my phone OK? - That's perfect! Now, if you could just write down what you are doing, when it happens and how you felt.
- OK? - OK.
I'm afraid we've actually already run out of time for this week.
Wow - It can go really fast.
- Yeah.
We got through a lot today, like I said.
I just want to add, too, Vanessa, I'm really proud of you.
I hope you can be too.
This was hard.
Thanks.
I just want to check in with you though about how you are feeling right now.
- I'm exhausted.
- Yeah, I bet.
- But I'm OK.
- Good.
You're off to see Ollie now, aren't you? Yeah.
You know, Vanessa, I'm gonna add just one more piece of homework, - if you don't mind - OK.
I'd love you to write down anything that makes you happy.
Anything that makes you smile, even to a little bit.
Think you can do that? - OK.
- Great.
And the first think you could write down is how you're gonna go see Ollie.
I will.
Thanks for coming, Vanessa.
- I'll see you next week, OK? - Yeah.
Hmm Thanks.
All I could think about was how cold I was.
And I I just needed someone.
But I felt like there was no one.
And then I Oh, I'm so stupid! I don't know why I didn't go there before I went to Matthew's.
I didn't even know if he still lived there and um He hugged me.
And he didn't judge me.
And then he made me hot chocolate, just like our grandma used to.
And uh And then, I came here.
And and you know everything else.
Oh Vanessa.
It sounds like you survived something just horrible.
And I can't imagine just how hard it was for you to tell me just now.
It was very brave.
I'm sorry it took me so long to finally tell you.
There is no need to be sorry.
You had to wait to be ready.
A year ago, we were complete strangers.
Yet, it seems easier.
Yes, that can be true.
Um Last week, you asked me why I wasn't sleeping well and I think it's because of all of this.
I hadn't been thinking about it for a long time.
I actually got good at finally forgetting everything, but uh then it just Just so you know, that's totally normal.
OK? Anniversaries, they they can be a big deal.
They can really dredge up these memory sometimes, OK? - No kidding.
- Yeah.
When you have these memories these nightmares, what parts stand out for you? The smells.
I can smell old beer cans.
And smoke But not like cigarette smoke, or pot, it's It's chalky.
Maybe some kind of other drug? And old basement.
And falling.
When he pulled me from the couch, I think about that a lot.
Yeah, I bet Those are really vivid, really scary memories.
Yeah Do you notice anything particular that triggers them, for you? Lots of things Whenever I walk downstairs, I feel like he's gonna be at the bottom.
Uh Lots of other stuff but I can't think of anything.
That's OK.
- We've talked about a lot of really tough stuff today.
- Yeah.
So Do you mind if I give you a bit of homework actually? - OK.
- Just, you know, this will help us to figure out more about these memories.
OK? And why they are being triggered.
So, the next time you have one of these moments when you feel like you're being transported back, if you could just write it down Do you mind doing that? - OK.
- OK.
Just make sure you keep a notebook or something like that nearby, at all times.
- Hmm is my phone OK? - That's perfect! Now, if you could just write down what you are doing, when it happens and how you felt.
- OK? - OK.
I'm afraid we've actually already run out of time for this week.
Wow - It can go really fast.
- Yeah.
We got through a lot today, like I said.
I just want to add, too, Vanessa, I'm really proud of you.
I hope you can be too.
This was hard.
Thanks.
I just want to check in with you though about how you are feeling right now.
- I'm exhausted.
- Yeah, I bet.
- But I'm OK.
- Good.
You're off to see Ollie now, aren't you? Yeah.
You know, Vanessa, I'm gonna add just one more piece of homework, - if you don't mind - OK.
I'd love you to write down anything that makes you happy.
Anything that makes you smile, even to a little bit.
Think you can do that? - OK.
- Great.
And the first think you could write down is how you're gonna go see Ollie.
I will.
Thanks for coming, Vanessa.
- I'll see you next week, OK? - Yeah.
Hmm Thanks.