CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Episode Scripts

N/A - Evaluation Day

(sirenswailing ) Unit 584-Adam.
Please be advised we're in pursuit of a BMW going southbound on lnterstate 15 at a high rate of speed.
( tires screeching ) ( tires screeching ) Driver, roll down your window.
Let me see your hands.
GlRL #1 : Don't shoot.
Don't shoot.
Don't shoot.
Don't shoot.
OFFlCER: Dispatch, Unit 584 is a Code Four.
We've got a couple of girls joyriding.
Rookie, clear the vehicle.
( garbled radio transmission ) More like a four.
"lchabod was horror struck on perceiving that he was headless.
" Sleepy Hollow.
GRlSSOM: Vitreous humor is glazed over.
What does that mean? That means that six to eight hours ago, somebody lost their head.
Then somebody lost their head.
"Who are you? "Who, who, who, who? "Who are you? "Who, who, who, who? "l really wanna know "Who are you? "Oh-oh-oh Who "Come on, tell me who are you, you, you Oh, you!" Sayonara.
Well, well, what a switch.
You actually beat us here.
It's evaluation day.
Hmm.
Where's Warrick? He was working spill-over on another case.
Oh, that's right.
He told me.
I forgot.
Well, maybe we should be evaluating you.
You're a riot, Alice.
You and I are going to work the head case.
Goody.
Nick, another homicide.
"4-19" 40 miles outside of Baker.
Okay.
Good I'm on it.
GRlSSOM: Sara, you go with him.
Yes.
Road trip.
I'm going to go switch boots.
Cath, I'll catch up with you.
I'll meet you at the autopsy.
Head-topsy.
Sit down.
Look, Grissom.
I know this is a bad time to bitch to the boss but, uh, I've been a CSl Level 3 for nine months now.
I was a CSl before Warrick.
Warrick works d.
b.
's solo.
Why can't l? Repeat after me.
Silk, silk, silk.
"Silk, silk, silk?" What do cows drink? Milk.
Cows drink water.
They give milk.
A simple riddle.
Common sense disguised in a puzzle of words, but an excellent barometer for evaluating someone's readiness.
Look, I'm not one of your suspects you can trick, okay? If I'm not ready, be a man-- tell me I'm not ready.
You're not ready.
You know why I took this job? Honestly? I wanted to pack heat, walk under the yellow tape, be the man but mostly, because I want you to think I'm a good CSl.
And that's the reason I have to hold you back.
Anybody who's great at anything, Nick, does it for their own approval, not someone else's.
( hard rock playing ) "I'll speak for you When you're gone" ( turns down volume ) Uh, voice sound familiar? Kind of sounds like the daytime coroner.
Gary Telgenhoff? Yep.
A songwriter in his off-time.
What do you think? It sucks.
Hmm.
Hey, I just filed for divorce.
I'm feeling a little confident.
I guess.
I like it.
So, where's the head? Well, police lD'd him at the scene when they ran his plates compared the DMV head shot to the head.
Grissom, Catherine, meet Victor DaSilva.
What did this? Hard to tell without making a mold.
Fatal blow? Looks like it.
Man, look at those chopping wounds on the jawbone.
They almost look like practice swings.
It could've been dark.
Bad aim, maybe? Definitely a crime of passion.
You think a female could do this? I could've.
Scared of you.
If you want to know what "exact" tools were used, we're going to need to boil the head.
Really? You want me to prepare it? Sure.
What, uh, additive do you put in your boil? Laundry detergent.
Works great.
It's like peeling off a rubber Halloween mask.
Excellent.
Well, I'm out of here.
I'm going to be with Brass; see if I can get anything on those Victoria Secret girls.
Where's your Crock-Pot, Doc? Mr.
Moore.
My grandson won't take my calls.
He'll only talk to you.
I think James called me tonight because he thought I could help him.
That was a nice thing you did giving him your pager number when he went away, but he should be calling me.
I'm his grandfather.
I deserve to know what happened.
James is all right but, uh, there was a big brawl at the detention center.
James was at the wrong place, at the wrong time.
What's my grandson looking at? If he talks, he'll be dead inside a month.
Now, if he keeps quiet, the D.
A.
will put the squeeze on him and he'll probably end up in the big house.
You could lose your boy forever then.
Why didn't James call me tell me? He probably knew what your advice would be.
To do the honorable thing.
There's no honor in jail.
Not without a price.
Look, a crime occurred.
CSl's got full jurisdiction.
I got myself assigned to the case-- see if I can take James out of the middle.
Can we offer you girls something to drink? Please don't say that word.
You want to tell us why two college freshmen were driving a stolen BMW with a head in the trunk? We already told you.
We had no idea that was in the trunk.
Gross.
Now there's a start-- "gross.
" Gross negligence-- flying down l-15 in a stolen car.
Gross anatomy-- a human bowling ball in the trunk.
Gross details-- Iet's hear it.
We lost our friends at Bar 9-1 -1.
We had no ride home.
We were bored.
So, we started doing shots of tequila with some guy who looked like Iike Cat Stevens.
( girls squealing ) Whoo! Next thing we know, we're in his van playing strip poker.
I can't believe we're doing this.
It was a blast at first.
Then, um then he said the creepiest thing.
So, I met this girl on the lnternet who offered me a round-trip ticket to fly out and help her end her life.
She wanted me to shove a tennis ball down her throat.
Lori! Lori, over here! Lori! Let me guess.
You left your clothes in the van.
We were so out of there.
This guy was weird.
Like way weird.
I was thinking that he was going to pull a Silence of the Lambs on me and tell me to "put the lotion in the basket.
" You know what I think? I don't think you two are murderers.
I think you're just felony stupid but for now, you're being booked on evading arrest, grand theft auto DWl.
You go with this officer here.
MAN ( over P.
A.
system ): Stabbing in Barracks A.
Lock down in effect.
Guards to their post, please.
I love my Grandpa-- don't get me wrong-- but he's got no idea how it works in here and I'm not sure you do, either.
Why don't you tell me? First off, this place only sees two colors: black and white.
You stay with your own.
Despite what those Chucks think upstairs, this entire place is infiltrated with Rolling 60s.
Overflow from L.
A.
Lot of education in a short time, huh? Yeah.
I mean, I'm just trying to survive, man.
I'm 60 days and a wake-up unless I get got.
James, why don't you take a deep breath and tell me what happened here? First you got to tell me something.
You got to tell me what side you're on.
Who's side I'm on? Who reached out to you, man? Who put me in here? James, I'm trying to help you.
All right.
Breaks down like this-- Kingpin from Gerson Park and Kingpin from L.
A.
County/Slauson both under one roof.
It was time for one of them to stake their claim.
Vegas fool got shanked.
I was sitting right there.
Since I'm the newest face and only witness, Iot of fingers pointed towards me.
So, it's your life versus time.
Basically, yeah and everybody knows about it.
They're just waiting to see what I'm going to do.
I sing they send me a song back.
I shut up I'm your age when I get out.
Who found the body? MAN: Department of Agriculture.
They were searching forwild horses in their chopper when theyfound it.
None of the boys would even go near it.
I had to tape the perimeter myself.
Where is "it"? Just follow my prints.
Oh, man.
There's no head.
Do you think it's DaSilva? If it's the rest of him, he's been skinned.
Uh Hands and feet have been amputated.
Yeah.
Most likely to avoid lD.
Hey, Sara? Yeah? No approaching surface prints.
No tire tracks.
Only O'Riley's boot prints.
These are ours.
Look at the area around the corpse.
Look at the big dent in the ground, like a meteor hit.
INMATE: That guy's from the crime lab.
You gonna spray some chemical stuff over the barracks, man? Hey, what you got in the tackle box, man? You going fishing? Hey, brother, what's up? Let me talk to you real quick.
Welcome to juvie.
It's all yours.
I'm not sure we should be doing this.
What are we doing? Walking through the garage.
Snooping for trace on Grissom and Catherine's stolen BMW? All right.
It's simple.
We got the body, they got the head.
The BMW's fair game.
Come on, Sara, where's your "Noriega"? What has gotten into you? Grissom.
Uh Sara want to take a look at this? It's like nothing I've seen before-- honestly, Gil-- in all my years.
The head or the torso? Torso.
Look at the width of the ribcage-- it's enormous-- and the shoulders are significantly Iarger in proportion and size compared to the average endomorph.
The bone structure is disproportionate.
Correct.
I measured the tibia and fibula around the ankle area, then the radius and the ulna at the wrists-- the bones are 10-15% larger than the standard Homo sapiens.
Left fracture of the ischial prominence of the pelvis.
Fracture of the pubis synphisus.
Fracture of the lumbar spine vertebrae Anything not broken? No, the trauma's similar to some of the leapers I get in here: out of state, out of cash and out the window.
Suicide by hotel.
This was not a hotel.
What you see here is the flattening and expansion of the body that could only be caused by the impact of a very steep fall.
If I know anything, I know two unequivocal truths: DaSilva's head does not belong to this body.
And the reason I know that is because the torso is not human.
What is it? I don't know.
You're going to need an anthropologist.
Mm-hmm.
Uh-huh.
( sighs ) Squirrels love 'em they get tossed at Dodger Stadium and they make a hell of a butter.
You're nuts.
You know that.
Exacta mundo.
Peanuts! Right scope's the shell Ieft scope's the skin of the nut.
Think "peanuts Espanol.
" Peanuts on the gas pedal.
You're kidding.
Mm-mm.
That's one of those funny clues.
Could mean nothing, could mean everything.
Hmm.
Whoa.
-Who are you, pal? -I'm Trent Calloway.
Who are you? I'm Jim Brass.
Homicide.
This is Gil Grissom.
Crime Lab.
Does a Victor DaSilva live here? Yeah, but he's out.
And you're in.
I'm painting the house.
In the middle of the night? Back up, Slick.
We got some questions.
GRlSSOM: So when was the last time you sawVictor DaSilva? A day or two ago.
This whole painting thing had him stressed out.
"Picking up airheads just got easier.
" Yeah, he worked freelance, mostly.
He won a "Bandy" award for that one.
He worked for an ad agency.
What else did he do for a living? That's it, as far as I know.
What about you? I mean, besides painting walls.
I'm a bouncer at the French Palace.
I throw guys like you out.
( chuckles ) Yeah.
You know, you don't seem too shook up about DaSilva's death.
We weren't that close.
We had some mutual friends, he needed someone to help him with this place and, uh, I never turn down a job.
Well, I hope you get paid in advance.
Found a picture of Victor DaSilva and, uh somebody.
What does that mean? Cut out.
So bizarre, human behavior.
What you can't cut out of your mind, you can always cut out of your photo album.
Why are we in the closet? I got a call from Greg Sanders, at our lab.
He found peanut shells on the foot pedals of Victor DaSilva's car.
Hmm.
And voila.
Mr.
Calloway, would you mind coming in here, please? Mr.
Calloway is there a remote possibility that Victor DaSilva ever worked at a concession stand of some sort Iike at a ballpark or the Secret Garden of Siegfried and Roy in the elephants' habitat? I don't think it's Victor's style.
This is ridiculous.
Well, not according to his size 1 1s.
Telling you the kids in here got nothing but time.
You'd be surprised what they can come up with.
WARRlCK: Nothing surprises me anymore.
Yeah? Wait awhile.
This is the main thoroughfare for all the toilets.
All the goods come through here.
You know, it's funny, I wanted to be a surgeon.
( sighs ) Step back for Molly.
Step back for Warrick.
Whew! ( groans ) Whew! ( sighs ) Man Impressive.
ROBBlNS: Dr.
Miller this is outside my purview as a coroner.
The specimen's pelvic girdle and spine are curved and upright suggesting the species may be quadrupedal.
The left and right femur and humerus are derivative of the Tarsius.
( sighs ) I think I knowwhat this is.
Your preliminary evaluation is correct, Dr.
Robbins.
It's not human, it's a primate.
More specifically, a gorilla.
NARRATOR ( on computer ): Bushmeat Hunters thrive on the murdering of gorillas for profit.
In the United States their meat is considered a delicacy.
It is said if the animal is ingested, its great powers will be passed on to the consumer.
What are you doing? Working the case.
What case? The skinned gorilla-- torso Remember? I don't think that is a case.
Well, it was at the start of shift.
A crime has been committed.
I hate to be the one to state the obvious, but, uh this isn't a human being we're dealing with-- it's an animal.
And And every time a dog gets run over, you can't go to the vet to examine it.
( chortles ) I can't believe you.
You, with your pet tarantula, your maggot farms, that Komodo dragon on back order You should be more sympathetic to the senseless murder of an innocent gorilla.
You're right.
I apologize.
I was just checking to see where your head was at.
For now, you're working alone.
Catherine needed Nick.
Bummer.
We got another dead body call.
Wait.
Is he missing a head? Maybe.
Meantime, you're on standby in case Nick needs backup.
Your evaluation form.
"Overall performance: Outstanding.
" "Ability to prioritize: lmprovement needed.
" You up for a riddle? Sure.
Why not? Okay, repeat after me: Silk, silk, silk.
Silk, silk, silk.
What do cows drink? Water.
Why? Never mind.
Who thought that a toothbrush could take a kid's life? Well, the son of a bitch was crafty, I'll give him that.
Melted the end of the toothbrush to insert the razor blade.
Then why the rubber band? Concealment.
Oh, that's deep.
Yeah.
Now all I got to do is put this shank in someone's hand.
Hey here's something new.
The cousin of footprints.
Sock prints Iook.
That's not from a shoe.
Look at the fabric impressions.
The guy ran out of here in his socks.
Mm-hmm.
Perp thought he could cover his tracks by taking off his shoes.
He thought wrong.
Manager spotted the blood during a night sweep.
Want to knowwho the shed was registered to? Victor DaSilva.
Our head.
Oh So this is the rest of his body? It ain't gorilla.
( sighs ) Well, this amount of blood suggests that the victim was killed here.
Why don't I do the one-to-ones and you start looking for the weapon? Yeah, whatever punctures, whatever chops.
Bob Villa.
Paul Bunyan.
WlLLOWS: By the way, what about my evaluation? Keep up the good work, Catherine.
Are those molds dry yet? They're tacky.
Hmm, positive to positive.
That'll never hold up in court, though.
We're going to need to make negative molds.
Tabling the ax.
Hammer time.
Um Pretty close.
All right, I fed the measurements from the claw end of the hammer.
Something doesn't seem right about this.
Why would you use the claw end of the hammer to kill him and not the hammer end? Wait a minute.
Maybe it wasn't about hitting him in the head.
Maybe it was about fitting him in the locker.
So, the footlocker had no head room.
Exactly.
So, uh, tricky Nick, what did you get on your evaluation? It's private.
Yeah, but how many "outstandings" did Grissom give you? Enough.
What did he tell you to look for? Grissom didn't tell me anything.
I put this together myself.
Give me some light here, will you, partner? Yeah.
All right, it's like this: sock prints were found at the crime scene, size 1 1.
Shoes Grissom took from the closet here, size 1 1.
DaSilva's shoe size: Ten.
So whose size 1 1 's were they? Grissom missed something.
( sighs ) SlDLE: "Spur's Corral.
" I know that place.
They give you peanuts for starters instead of bread or chips and salsa.
I'm calling Grissom.
Look, you obviously don't need my help.
I-I got go put something to rest.
See you later? All right, thanks.
GRlSSOM: The body from the storage shed-- it's Victor DaSilva, all right.
We ran his prints.
It's nice that he still had his hands.
I was wrong about the cause of death.
The hammer didn't do it? No.
He was shot point blank in the heart.
.
380.
Imagine the human heart as an apple.
Instant liquefaction.
We found everything else in that shed; I don't know why we didn't find a gun.
Well, maybe he was shot somewhere else? That would explain the plastic.
What plastic? You never told me about any plastic.
I didn't? Oh.
The victim was wrapped in a plastic sheet.
Victor DaSilva's entire house was covered in plastic.
He was having it painted.
Really? Who's the painter? Nobody famous.
Yet.
You had access to Victor DaSilva's house? -Yeah, I was painting it.
-You own a gun? I don't mean a paint gun.
No.
WlLLOWS: Let's get to it.
What's your shoe size? Why? I have a shoe fetish.
I love feet.
It's 13.
Take off your shoes and socks.
We need to verify.
Okay step on the paper.
Two sizes too big.
You can go.
I'd tell you not to step on the evidence, but, uh Yeah, but what's the point? Pretty good gimmick they got here, though.
You eat peanuts, toss the shells on the floor-- nobody gives a rat's ass.
No, Victor DaSilva never worked here.
We found one of your uniforms in his closet.
Any idea how it got there? Guys-- look, boss, I'm sorry.
I thought I was on to something here.
I had a conflict in shoe sizes.
So, I thought I'd play a hunch.
Sara was right there.
We checked out the shoes ( Nick continues talking in background ) so that's why l buzzed you guys down.
You got to follow your hunches, right? Yeah, sure.
Tim? You still got that picture that you took from DaSilva's house? Yeah.
Yeah, here it is.
What? You're looking at the sombrero? The earrings.
Victor DaSilva was here with someone he cut out of his life.
Probably his girlfriend.
Excuse me.
You recognize this ear? You got to be kidding me.
Wait a minute.
Yeah, I do.
I do recognize those earrings.
GRlSSOM: Fred Applewhite? You all here for lunch? No.
Take out.
I heard you were disassembling the gorilla.
For purposes of disease control.
Per the CDC, I have to take samples and dispose of this animal immediately.
Well, I've been trying to find out who did this to her and, um, I have some questions.
You ask, I'll answer.
Why amputate the gorilla's head? It's a trophy.
American fetishers would pay up to $10,000 for the head of a Low Land Gorilla.
The hands and feet? Novelty items.
Sold as ashtrays.
Here Nick and I were thinking it was to avoid lD.
Why skin it? Purses, shoes, boots it's sad.
Genetically, we're 92.
7% identical with gorillas.
It's hard to tell where the human ends and the animal begins.
Well said.
I checked out a couple of websites Bushmeat.
net, Gorilla.
org.
I think she was killed probably in Cameroon or Congo transported to the Port of Los Angeles.
Dismembered, packaged Ioaded onto a small plane.
En route, they dumped what they couldn't sell but, uh, I just have to find the plane.
Needle in a haystack.
Chances are, whoever did this are halfway around the world by now.
There must be something I can do.
Actually, there is.
For everyone that parts, one stands above ground.
Okay, Mr.
Applewhite take a walk.
Okay, great.
Now, Mr.
Applewhite this time, I want you to do something different.
This time run.
GRlSSOM: Footprints are almost as reliable as fingerprints and every step tells a story.
The first few steps, you were walking.
See the complete heel, arch and five little piggies? The next few steps, however the heel disappears.
All of the pressure was put on ball of the foot and toes.
Why? 'Cause you were running and my guess is that on the day you had a head in your hand.
STOKES: You see, everyone's foot makes a unique well impression.
Check it out.
The, uh, width the ball of the foot instep arch and, uh size 1 1 for dessert.
GRlSSOM: Mr.
Applewhite your footprints place you at the crime scene.
Victor and I were partners.
We shared everything including in our house and in the storage shed.
We know that.
When did you move out? Three months ago.
He found somebody else kicked me out.
And you took all your possessions with you? Not everything.
So, you were hoping for a reconciliation.
Yeah.
I thought once Victor got this new guy out of his system, he'd come around.
But he didn't, did he? That's why you went to his house last night.
Who said I went there? The plastic-- you know the plastic that you lay down when you paint a house the kind of plastic that you, uh wrap a dead body in the plastic that we found your fingerprints on.
Let me tell you what I think happened.
Take what you want.
I don't care.
I've moved on.
What do you think you're going to do, just paint me out of your life? -Just take what you want and get out.
I'll tell you what I want.
Damn it! God! So, what did you forget? You wouldn't believe it, but I forgot to lock the shed.
BRASS: And when you came back out your car was gone.
Yeah.
I don't know who took it.
We do.
Lori! Lori! You know, that reminds me-- I got to remember to take Greg Sanders to lunch.
He did a nice job sniffing out those peanuts.
Yeah, he did.
We were waiting for you.
Meet Ronnie Connors.
Where's his attorney? What are you talking to him about my business? Ask me.
Where's your lawyer? Ask him.
How's your plaque? My what? Your teeth.
I mean, how many toothbrushes does a guy need? Apparently, for you it's as many as it takes to make the perfect shank.
Let me tell you something, breeze.
I'm LA County/Slauson payback Crip, cuz.
I got a lot of offspring up in here-- black as night.
They answer to me because I'm the macaroni.
I mean, seriously you have any idea who you're talking to? Yeah.
So, why don't I have to testify? The evidence will testify for you.
Ronnie Connors bought a toothbrush and some rubber bands at the commissary.
He didn't know it but that's the last shank he'll ever make.
How'd you know it was RC's? Before he made the shank, he shaved with the same razor.
His DNA was all over the blade.
Oh, God.
I owe you, man.
It's not me you have to thank.
I love you, Grandpa.
You're all I got, James.
You're everything to me, you hear? I thought you said we were grabbing a beer.
We are, after this.
Aw, Grissom, you know, this is your thing.
-Ah-ah-ah.
Every nine years and 34 days, I feel like sharing.
You'll like it.
It cleanses you.
Cleanses me? Whatever happened to my evaluation? You're sitting in it.
"speak for you when you're gone "I'll speak for you when your lips are cold and blue Dead men do tell tales, I'll speak for you" Ahhh! Ah, ah, ah! CBS PRODUCTlONS and ALLlANCE ATLANTlS